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If we lived loud enough
To silence the voice of reason
And wore our true colors
To show who we truly are
Our soulmates would glow
Like rays of sunshine
Calling us to come home
And our dreams would be realized
Faster than we can take it all in
We would meet lovers and friends who will never leave us
And see the world for what it truly is:
A mixed bag of heroes , liars , angels and demons.
There’s something in me that wants to destroy me
A voice that works to punish without reason
A hand that is brought down undeservedly on an innocent conscience.  
A cane that leaves ****** lines across my mind
As it beats the positivity into submission
And a spear which impales my confidence
Like a soldier would do to its enemy.
The mirror is my enemy
It shows me things way before I am prepared to accept them
And forces me to stare at a creation I deem inadequate.
Saying my name leaves a sour taste in your mouth.
Your hazel eyes burn at the site of this shadow you wish you never recognized.

But I still ache to feel your guiding hand
And hear your calming words.
I still feel your warmth,
Long after you’ve left me in the freezing cold.

I wait everyday for that warmth to return,
Hopeful that I won’t spend another night  aching to feel a sense of belonging.
It hurts to watch your perceived future walk away, but better is yet to come.
If I let you peek inside
The dark room called my heart,
Would you run from the faces
And blood on the walls?
Would you hide from me?
From the fear of being engulfed
By the emotional flames
which consume me
Daily?
It’s a terrible experience to let people in and they give up on you. This poem is centred around that exact feeling which is something I fear very much.
Behind this smile,
Lie puddles of regret,
Flowing into a river of melancholy,
Washing into an ocean of self loathing.

As my aspirations float down this stream,
They become soaked in doubt,
Until eventually,
they are so fragile,
That I’m convinced I have no choice but to abandon them,
And watch as they slowly sink down
Till I cannot see or feel them anymore.
I feel sick to my stomach when I have to lie about how I’m doing everyday.
Elsewhere another weeps hopelessly
At the loss of love as strong as mine
Another back too is sliding down a wall
As lovers waltz carelessly in the garden of laughter
My first poem on here and it’s a short/more experimental one for me. I usually don’t write about love so this is sort of new for me. Enjoy!

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