Tired eyes
Tired tongue
Blatant lies
Heart numb
Love me now
Love me never
Think I know
You'll choose the latter

The walls are white
The floor is blue
The sky not quite above
Me and you
Just a panel away
Everybody else sits
So completely okay
An inch becomes a mile
The door a barrier
Between us and happy smiles

Curled up so small I unleash
A monster so big
Answering anxieties call
In everyway
It's told not to
Beside me you slash away at
The scary monster
Whipping it with words
Comforting hand squeezes
And cries of favourite bands

We're lead to a cave
Not trapping of us
But of the world
Saving us from
Outside these paper walls
We colour them in
Til ours pencils are blunt
And our eyes
Dry from the tears
That spill our fears out to the open.

You're the dark blue hue set over the beauty of untravelled worlds
Drawing me back to the blanket of a comforting home
Drowning me in sickly sweet memories
Turning my hopes and my dreams to pointless could of beens

You're the poloroids stuck to the shabby cabin walls
A constant burning reminder of what I left behind
A snapshot of a non-existent place
That I yearn so hard to go home and find

You're an anxious longing for untouched perfection
I wish to hold it in my gentle hands
A love for the soft yet constant melody
Of an old song from my favourite band

You hold me back, hugging me in the comfort of your wooden arms
I'm oblivious that the plane I board will turn your wood to charcoal
And my perfect metallic palace
Will rust in the acid rain

Distorted thoughts,
Amplified by the darkness,
Growing loud in sound,
And further away,
From what's real,
But you
            don't
                   know,
The label you put,
On the old sliver mirror,
Is somehow an illusion,
Tonight,
Everything is bright,
Everything is scary,
Everything is endless

What was once simple,
Is now a world of worry,
Stress sprouting like trees,
From the overgrown garden,
That is your tired mind,
It tries to run,
Exhausted from trips,
To the shadowy spots in your head,
Right now,
Everything is blinding,
Everything is terrifying,
Everything is endless

Shaking,
Mind racing so fast,
It could out speed a race car,
But not before your heart and lungs,
Win first and second prize,
And they all stand on a podium,
Over looking your sanity,
Now,
Everything is here,
Everything is now,
Everything is endless.

Standing there,
Light bouncing gracefully,
Off your auburn hair,
You are more than I could ever imagine,
You might be when we first met,
But now you're here,
And I let you have all my secrets without a thought

You are never far, always near
In case I ever (always) need you,
You don't tell me you love me,
And nor do I to you,
Simply because we don't need words to see it

We fight for each other,
Defend till the very last breath,
And cover the charcoal tracks,
Of acts maybe we shouldn't of commit,
We gift each other with smiles and laughter,
And acts of care not visible to the passerby,
But that can be seen bright and colourful in our eyes

We share endless calls sitting on bedroom floors,
Scattered with reminders of each others presence,
Lent books, borrowed clothes and past birthday presents,
All coloured in by you

You're not a loud bang of care,
But a quiet friend who is always there,
Whether I need you deperately or not,
So don't think you'll ever be forgot,
By those who paint in gold,
And who's love is told,
Because though they are magical,
And light up unknown fires inside of me,
You will always be the glowing orange,
And even in the background,
I'll still hear you just as loud.

Blue tinted lips,
Curved round at their edges,
Not quite candor,
In what they choose to convey

Blue tinted lips,
Growing frost in the bitter cold,
Lifeless yet living,
A mask for your purple corpse

Blue tinted lips,
Drowning thoughtlessly,
In the indigo ocean,
Surrounding your burnt out head

The sound of sitting in the cold,
Arms locked tight together,
Nor lies or truths are told,
In the silence of tonight

The comfort of hip to hip bindings,
Of breathes tangled together as one,
Of reluctant tears streaming down battered cheeks,
Of smiles about to come

The quiet warmth of a hug,
So fitting to this loud moment,
And the clasp of a hand tugging,
On old, colour faded, hoodie strings

The glowing of the street lamps,
Lighting up our once grey faces,
Showing it's stamp in silence,
Love need not have a voice

My ocean
My sea
Swallowing me
Carefully
In your
Fibreglass
Arms

A look down upon,
A once joyful photograph,
Now locked down by,
A shattered pain of glass,
I smile,
Even though I'm in pain,
Staring at tainted memories,
Whilst walking through the rain,
I thought you were sunshine,
Before I knew the definition,
Know I understand,
You were toxic all this time.

A melancholic feeling,
Washes over me,
Now I know you were stealing,
The meaning of happiness,
And replacing it with self loathing
And self doubt,
You were all I had,
I didn't know what without you,
Looked like,
So like the trees,
I tried desperately to hold on,
To golden leaves already fallen.

I know I need to let go,
You make my world duller,
But you are still my black and white,
Even if my world has colour,
It's difficult to let you fall,
I know that it might break you,
And I don't want shatter your bones,
Even if you broke,
My patchwork, beating heart.

Snuggled in your arms,
I feel safe,
I feel warm,
Protected from the shadows,
Just you and I,
The monsters can't reach us tonight.

Wilted flowers,
Dying by the closed window,
In the the darkness they cower,
Suffering through the lack,
Of days spent with you.

These flowers jewel my childhood,
The colour in my photo book,
Now distant, cold and grey,
Petals falling each time,
 A maybe doesn't come to life.

Flowers see the mask,
The man hidden beneath,
A shadow of who he used to be,
Or maybe it was always pretend,
I was just to blind to see.

Stare up,
I see escape,
A universe,
Overflowing with,
A million curiosities,
Waiting to be found.

Stare up,
I see beauty,
A whirlpool,
Of pretty fairylights,
Dotted on the ink,
Soaked sky.

Stare up,
I see wishes,
The eyes of,
A hopeful child,
Who believes in,
The night time magic.

Stare up,
I see home,
A place I belong,
Even if I,
Am an alien to,
Them.

Heart racing,
Blood pumping,
Sweat dripping.

Air thick,
Ground wet,
Footsteps heavy.

Fear revving,
Anger laughing,
Normality waving.

Branch snap,
Breathe fast,
Hide well.

Damage done,
Regret building,
Memories mocking.

Voices startle,
Growing nearing,
Pain awaits.

Deep canyons of regret,
Etched clumsily into the soul,
The pitiful burning of a lone twig,
A message written in coal,
The hesitation,
That brutally murders dreams,
The questions,
That rip adventures at the seams,
The desperate rescue attempt of a flower,
Days ago dead,
The late night wonder,
Of all one could of said

My feet buzz againest the hard wood floor,
They want to escape,
They dream of more,
Than this grey skies uniformity

They want to pitter patter,
Againest alien surfaces,
They want to know what matters,
The most in this misty life.

They want to live their fantasies,
They want clarity,
To have a monochrome rainbow,
As their reality

They want to splash though an icy river,
That carries joyous smiles,
And less than carefully calculated,
Phone dials

They want the moonlight,
To bonce off their paper skin,
To be able to make memories,
To share with kin

They want to tip toe,
Up creaky stairs,
To bring best friends up,
To their sunshine lairs

They want to fall in love with the certainty,
That tommorrow brings,
Another day unfolding just as perfectly,
As the last

A cinema of films,
Conjured up by the mind,
A place to live in,
Whilst you leave today's life behind
A castle coated in gold,
A drawing done in sliver,
A place were stories are told,
Only in the good light

An escape route from reality,
Who wants to think,
Of your present responsibilities,
Let'***** the rewind button,
You can always delve deeper,
When in the past and,
Life is always sweeter,
When the bitter is removed.