Life is full of choices.
I dont really get a say in those.
What should I know anyway, I'm only fifteen.
Because of this I dont know anything.
I don't know how I feel or my sexuality or any of the right answers to "grown up" problems.
What should I know about who I like.
What should I know about separations, and divorces. What should I know about ****, ****** abuse, or physical abuse.
What should I know about having to make hard decisions.
I havn't lived long enough to gain enough experience.
Well I know about who I like. To me a relationship is when there is a strong connection between two people that they don't share with others. Its not always about ***. Its not always about gender. To me, that connection can be made with anybody.
I know about separations. I know it can be hard for everyone in the family. Not just the children. Not just the parents. I know it is hard for me. I know it is hard for my Mother. I know it will be hard for my Dad when he finds out.
I know about ****. I have been *****.
I know about ****** abuse. I spent six years going through that and longer with physical abuse. Being beaten and hurt. Crying out and nobody helping.
And I know about hard decisions. I have only made a few but I know how difficult and painful they can be. I had to choose between parents. I had to choose my future. I had to choose to report my own brother for hurting me for so many years. I had to turn in family. My mother blames me. And I guess in a way it is my fault.
I know I am still young. I was robbed of my childhood and forced to face realities that no child should have face. I don't have as much experience as others, but I still have experience. I still have feelings. My age does not make me dumb, and does not mean I can be ignored. I am as much of a person as ever one else on this earth and I will not be belittled anymore.
I do not know everything.
I dont even know everything about myself. This, however, does not mean I know nothing. I am proud to be who I am. And everyone else should be proud of who they are. I have a story. We all have stories. We all have pains and we all have problems. Age does not effect these problems. They are still there.
I'm going through so much right now, and I don't have much support. I feel like I'm going through life alone and it gets overwhelming. Everone has problems big and small no matter the age. I'm just so tired of people saying kids and teens don't have issues. We do.