You were my neighbour
And I felt good vibes from you
Right from the start
We soon became good friends
And as the years passed by, our bond strengthened
Now, I see you as not just a friend
But also a family member
You are very simple and humble
Not to mention, loyal to a fault
However, underneath your calm exterior
Lies a burning passion
Especially when it comes to gaming and Hindu mythologies
The best part about you
Is that you always want to do the right thing
Even if it means losing friends in the process
Of course, as I told you recently
Those people are not truly friends
But haters in disguise
You are also extremely selfless
A quality that makes you very likeable
And at the same time, vulnerable
Anyway, as I said before
You are as good as a family member to me
And your family also sees me
As one of its own
Our phone conversations are usually very long
And I love how you take time out for me
Right in the middle of your busy schedule
I feel I can trust you
With anything and everything
Just remain the way you are
And believe in yourself a little more
Take care and see you soon da!

Dear Urvashi, wish you a belated happy birthday!!
I've known you for less than a year
However, that doesn't take away the fact
That we've always shared a cordial relationship
Not just as colleagues
But also as good friends
Right from the day we met
I knew that we would get along
Like peas in a pod
As you told me recently
Our conversations have always been meaningful
Whether it be work or personal stuff
I've never felt dull or bored
While interacting with you
You understand me very well
I can be weird sometimes
But that has never bothered you
Because the only thing that truly matters to you
As far as a relationship is concerned
Is character
In fact, that's the way it should be
Also, I've always enjoyed working with you
You are very talented
And your communication skills are top-notch
Not to mention, you are super helpful
I am sure you will make us all proud
As far as your career is concerned
Of course, luck hasn't always been on your side
But you just need to believe in yourself
Stand in front of the mirror
Tell yourself "I can do it"
And you will do it
You also have a fun side
This was on display
When we had the team lunch at Canto
And the team dinner at TOIT
Oh boy, when you talk
You go on and on
As though nothing can stop you
And I feel so comfortable with you
That it almost seems
As though I'm talking to a family member
Finally, you are very sweet and caring
Something that I've particularly noticed
When it comes to your family
By the way, please give my regards to them
And hope you had a great time yesterday
Take care and may the Lord bless you
With loads of love, success, happiness and peace

When all hopes are dashed
When nothing goes right
When water turns into sludge
Gold turns into rusted iron
Love turns into Hatred
Happiness turns into Despair
Friendship turns into Betrayal
And last but not the least
Good turns into Evil
I think of you
To the world, you may be an actress
But to me, you represent Hope
Your smile tells me
That everything is going to be all right soon
Your laugh tells me
To forget all my troubles
And come up with jokes instead
Including those that make fun of our government
Without the fear of getting arrested
Your sweet voice tells me
To listen to Harris Jayaraj melodies
So that I can stay calm
Even when facing an angry cobra
Who is itching to send me back to my maker
Your expressions tell me
That life is an emotional rollercoaster
Full of ups and downs
And sometimes it is okay not to be happy
Or to experience mood swings
And finally
Your dance moves tell me
That sometimes you just need to play kuthu songs
And dance like Legend Saravanan
No matter what the society says
And yes, I don't know you well
You probably haven't even heard of me
But thank you for entering my life
And finding a way to keep me sane
Even when I am surrounded by chaos on all sides
And there is no escape route

Dear Nithya
Wish you a very very happy birthday!!
I am sure this birthday will be that much more special
Given the momentous event that is going to happen
An event that will change your life for the better
Well, I've known you since I was a kid
Though we haven't met frequently
Nor have we spoken a lot
But I've always been fond of you
You are a very nice person
Very warm, friendly and jovial by nature
You bring a lot of cheer
To everyone around you
Not a single moment with you
Can ever be called "boring"
You are so witty
That the Sorting Hat will scream "Ravenclaw!!"
The moment it touches your head
Also, you are very sensitive
And care deeply about your family, cousins and friends
We've had some great times
Whether it be India, US or Ireland
Coming to Ireland, you were an excellent tour guide
The incredible views of the Pacific Ocean from the Cliffs of Moher
Continue to give me goosebumps to this day
And Glendalough Upper Lake was nothing less than Paradise on Earth!!
Finally, I shall never forget the moment
When we had the finest Irish beer, at Temple Bar
Then, as far as US was concerned
The cruise on Lake Michigan was absolutely unforgettable
As were the views from Hancock Tower
Not to mention, the picnic we had at the Chicago Bean!!
Anyway, coming back to you
I hope you have a day to remember
Wish you loads of love, happiness and merriment
And may the Lord bless you!!

When I met you
I developed an instant liking
Though it was not in a romantic sense
You seemed to be a bit shy
But at the same time, quite friendly
Not to mention, down-to-earth
We got along nicely
And when I met your family
I was impressed
Not due to wealth, class or social status
But because of the fact that they were all very good human beings
With no attitude or airs whatsoever
And they were already okay to accept me as one of their own
Well, we soon started speaking over the phone
On a daily basis
And since we had developed a good understanding
I agreed to marry you
The engagement was a simple affair
But I got the feeling
That we were a cute couple
Especially when we took you on a trip
Right after the engagement
As I mentioned earlier
Though I didn't have any romantic feelings
When I first met you
They soon started to develop
During the period between the engagement and the marriage
I even funded your marriage expenses
Because I trusted you
Never did I imagine
That you would eventually betray my trust
Especially after the date we had in Pondicherry
Of course, COVID19 struck
And our marriage had to be postponed indefinitely
Naturally, you were very upset
I myself was quite depressed
But I thought we could at least talk it out
Instead, you started avoiding me
As well as my family
I let it slide
Since I truly loved you
Eventually, after a week or so, we started talking again
However, things were definitely not the same as earlier
I could sense a lack of enthusiasm from your side
Moreover, you were free to talk only around 9 PM
Though ideally you should have been free throughout the day
Considering you lost your job due to COVID
Something for which you were duly compensated
By my father, who kept sending you money every month without fail
Anyway, I let it slide again
Because I loved you
On the eve of our wedding, I wrote a heart-touching poem
Which was appreciated by almost everybody
Except the person for whom it was written
That is, you
Anyway, I thought things would change
Once the wedding finally happened
However , they didn't
I made many attempts to strike a conversation
But you were only interested in watching your precious serials
I too began to watch them, for your sake
Mind you, I am no fan of serials
But I thought I should make an exception
For my dear wife
However, was I ever dear to you?
You never talked to me on your own
And when I tried to talk to you
You kept repeating the same thing
That we would eventually talk at some stage
I kept wondering and wondering
As to when that "stage" would eventually arrive
Then came the ultrasound pregnancy test
With its shocking results
From then on, you were a changed person
You kept clinging to me
And refused to let me out of your sight
You even forced me
To stop talking to my best friend
And your own best friend did her best
To make me feel as guilty as possible
Blinded by love, as I was
I refused to listen to reason
Believing that you were being discriminated against
Because of your class and caste
When you finally confessed
That you had slept with another guy
You couldn't even look me in the eye
Because of your betrayal, I went through depression
For more than a month
I am not going to waste my time
Discussing the tedious and protracted divorce process
But you took advantage of me
And my frigging autism
You lied to me and cheated me
And I loved you
Yes, it sounds difficult to believe
But I genuinely loved you
And was thus made to suffer
It's time all feminazis take note of this
Rather than jumping into conclusions
And blaming the male whenever there is a divorce
Or even an estrangement
That's all I have to say
Amen!

Recruitment is a difficult job
Surely, everyone knows that
It is like chasing a target of 350 in 50 overs
However, when you are hiring Investment Bankers
The target remains the same
But the pitch, which is a belter as of now
Suddenly acquires a greenish hue
And the ball starts swinging and seaming
One mistake, and you are back to the pavilion
Meanwhile, the asking rate keeps climbing
Thus, the pressure keeps building
Yes, that's how tricky Investment Bankers are
At least as far as India is concerned
However, European Investment Bankers are a different ballgame altogether
The target continues to be the same
As does the nature of the pitch
However, now you have to chase the target in 40 overs!!
Well, you decide to steel yourself
To bat out of your skins
And do manage to hit a few ***** out of the park
However, your joy is short-lived
As you go for one boundary too many
Only to get caught at deep square leg
More and more batsmen follow
And try their level best
To keep the required run rate under control
But the wickets keep tumbling
Meanwhile, your last hope, Hardik Pandya, arrives at the crease
And takes the game by the scruff of the neck
While at the other end, Virat Kohli stands strong
And the pair manage to build a partnership of 100
However, the European I-Bankers end up having the last laugh
As Virat gets run out
While going for a quick single
And Hardik goes for a maximum
Only to get caught
Just inside the boundary line
By now, you know, as do the European I-Bankers
That the game is well and truly up
Unless a miracle happens
Well, all you can say
Is "Better Luck next time"
Also, welcome to the world of hiring European Investment Bankers

Whenever I start work
You are the first person
Who enters my mind
It is you who I think of
Whenever I am feeling low
Because your smile is so magical
That it makes me forget all my worries
And step into a whole new universe
Full of happiness and love
Peace, Hope, Freedom
Wonder, Warmth, Gratitude
And above all, sheer positivity
Your laugh transports me to seventh heaven
When you cry, I cry along with you
Because I feel your pain
When you are angry, I feel your righteous indignation
And it makes my blood boil
Such that, I feel like punishing the person
Who dared to wrong you
You are indeed an amazing actress
Blessed with exceptional talent
And at the same time, willing to put in the hard yards
And unwilling to let success go to your head
Not to mention, you are a wonderful human being
With a heart of gold
A person who is not afraid of speaking her mind
No matter how mercilessly our society might judge her
Well, I've had my share of celebrity crushes
However, you are something else, entirely
And I don't want to put pressure on you
But I am sure you will become a huge star
As long as you remain the way you are
Wish you all the very best
And last but not the least
Please keep smiling, as always

You were my colleague
Until a few weeks ago
Whenever I came to office
It was your presence
That brought a smile to my face
After the exhausting commute from my home
By the dreaded Mumbai locals
You were a ball of energy
And I felt so comfortable with you
That it was as though I was interacting with a family member
We had an excellent rapport
And I truly enjoyed working with you
I can never forget our team lunch at Canto
And of course, the grand team dinner at TOIT
On both occasions, all of us had a wonderful time
However, it was always you
Who turned out to be the life of the party
You are sweet and innocent
And your laughter is so infectious
That it makes us forget all our worries
And live in the moment
You may not be my colleague now
But you are still a good friend of mine
And will always be
It would be great if we can catch up again soon
Meanwhile, I wish you all the very best
For your career as well as your personal life
And last but not the least
Please keep smiling, as always

Let's say I am in love with Ms. B
Being a hypothetical situation, there is no need to use proper names
So, here it goes
Dear B,
You mean the world to me
For you, I am willing to do anything
That is, of course, anything ethical
You can rant all day as you like
I will listen, understand and empathise
I can be a shoulder for you to cry on
Your happiness, is all that matters to me
You lose your temper? that's fine
After all, it happens to me too
More frequently that you would imagine
You need some space?
Of course, I will give you space
I understand what it means
To be surrounded by people all the time
And thus end up losing the opportunity
To have some "me time"
After all, not only am I an introvert
I am also autistic
And too much talking often drains the hell outta me
Except when it comes to topics I am comfortable with
Such as trains, Harris Jayaraj music, food, Harry Potter
Agatha Christie ****** mysteries, cricket, tennis
And of course, anything to do with Aishwarya Lekshmi
Anyway, I will do my very best
To make our relationship work
I will always be there for you
Through good and bad times
Of course, that doesn't mean
That I will be overprotective
You must have your independence
I'm pretty sure you can take care of yourself
However, when it comes to a situation
Where you end up biting more than you can chew
You just have to say the word
And I will be at your side
You have a few male friends
With whom you are intimate?
That's completely okay with me
Of course, my best friend is a woman
You should be okay with that
Remember, it works both ways
Then, there is the sheer pain you have to go through
When it comes to having a baby
In order to avoid that, I am open for adoption
Or even test tube babies
Of course, only if you are okay with either option
Remember, I will always love you
Whether you are at your best
Or at your worst
However, I expect the same from you as well
As I mentioned earlier, I am autistic
Which means I am socially awkward
And also socially awkward
Though I come from a vegetarian family
I eat a lot of meat
Chicken, mutton, prawn, pork, beef
You name it, you have it
Of course, unfortunately not within the boundaries of my home
Also, my political views are often radical
For instance, I do not consider Kashmir as a part of India
And I am all for a radical redistribution of power
On the basis of class and caste
Such that the poor and the underprivileged get back what is theirs
In fact, what has been theirs for three thousand years
Also, though I was born a Hindu
I actually pray to Jesus
That is, I have been doing it for the last nine months
But I don't go to church
Nor do I follow any traditions or rituals
Jesus is simply a friend to me
I believe everything will work out eventually
If I place my faith in him
Finally, I am not interested in ***
Except as a means of reproduction
I need emotional and psychological intimacy
I will share everything with you
And I expect the same from you as well
If you are okay with all this
Then we can be a team
Until Death do us part
If you are not okay
Then maybe we can just be friends
If you are not comfortable with that as well
Then we are free
To go our own separate ways
On this note, let me end my musings
And return to reality

When I started my MBA
I was looking forward to making new friends
And of course, excelling in academics
And thus redeeming myself
After my Engineering debacle
However, it never occurred to me
That I would fall in love
For the first time in my life
You changed everything
Right from our second meeting
I was drawn towards you
You were very shy
But in a good way
And of course, extremely sweet-natured
The kind of person who wouldn't hurt a fly
Though you didn't know much Tamil
In spite of being a Tamilian
Your English more than made up for that
You didn't speak a lot
However, when you did speak
You were able to articulate your thoughts exceedingly well
And though we never had a detailed conversation
Apart from our debate on the movie "Ra One"
It was always a pleasure to interact with you
And of course, listen to your captivating voice
Last but not the least
Your handwriting was so exquisite
That it had the capability
To transform the dullest subject
Into an extremely fascinating one
Anyway, I truly loved you
But I couldn't muster the courage
To ask you out
However, I don't have any regrets whatsoever
And regardless of where you are currently
I hope you are having the time of your life
Just one last thing
I am utterly gobsmacked
That you knew all along
Something that I could never guess
From the way you spoke to me
Or behaved with me in general
You are indeed an incredible lady
And I hope you remain the way you are
Because the world needs more people like you

We've known each other
For more than ten years
Initially we were neighbours
And it didn't take a lot of time
For us to get along with each other
Moreover, it also helped
That my maternal grandmother
Was a good friend of your mother
So, we soon became good friends
Since we had a lot in common
The most important of all
Was the fact that we lacked friends
And by "friends" I mean true friends
With whom we could share anything
And who were always ready to help us
If the need arose
Well, I badly needed such a friend
And I am really glad to say
That you fit the bill very well indeed
Because you are extremely humble and unassuming
Don't judge anyone
Possess a lot of patience
Don't get angry easily
Are very gentle by nature
And above all, are thoroughly loyal and trustworthy
Whenever I've visited your home
I've always been treated like a family member
Your mother is extremely kind and sweet by nature
And understands me as well
As my own family does
I've also enjoyed visiting your game centre
And watching movies for free
You are very talented indeed
And I hope and pray
That all that hard work you've been putting in
Finally pays off one day
I feel very comfortable sharing things with you
Seriously, it gives me a lot of relief
Since you are a great listener
And more empathetic than you give yourself credit for
Similarly, you are also welcome
To share anything and everything with me
I am always ready to listen
And offer you moral support
Last but not the least
I will always help you whenever you are in need
Take care, keep smiling and may God bless you da

There are times
When I wish I could be a child again
Because, as far as adulthood is concerned
There is a lot of pressure and expectations
And many complications as well
Work, relationships, time, money, health
The list is endless
Also, let us not forget
That I am a divorcee
And yearning for a second marriage
Or at least, some kind of romantic relationship
And at the same time
I have to deal with work as well
Anyway, I wish I could be a child again
Because my childhood was awesome
Lots of love
From my family, cousins and relatives
Playing cricket with one of my close cousins
Going on train trips with family
Having fun with schoolmates
Including enacting the part of a Japanese anime princess!!
Playing chess with my maternal grandfather
Watching the golden era of Sachin Tendulkar
Listening to AR Rahman classics
Watching the best movies of Superstar Rajinikanth
Playing tennis with my father
During my second visit to Mumbai
And best of all
Having a life free of tension and worries
Except of course, as far as studies were concerned!!
Well, there were bad times too
For instance, the bullying I faced
Which forced me to leave a renown school
In the span of just one week!!
Nevertheless, on the whole
My childhood is something to be cherished forever
And reflecting back on it as an adult
I am filled with a sense of nostalgia
Being a Potterhead, I wish I could use a Time Turner
And go back in time
In order to revisit all those fond memories in person
Yes, I am not ashamed to say
That I wish I could be a child again

We met about seven years ago
And I had the great pleasure
Of working with you
You were warm and friendly
As well as extremely helpful and supportive
Whenever I got stuck on a mandate
I knew I could turn to you for guidance
However, the best part was
You were uber cool
Nothing could ever shake you
And even if I struggled sometimes
You never pushed me to deliver
Something that I appreciated immensely
Of course, you were my Team Lead
But you are also a good friend of mine
Though it's been a very long time
Since we last met
We have been keeping in touch
Every now and then
You not only put up with my rants
But also advise me from time to time
Whether it be work or personal issues
I am also very happy
That you are now a mother
I'm sure you will do wonders
As a mother and a wife
And also as a HR professional
Please continue to be the amazing human being that you are
And I hope to catch up with you soon
Take care and wish you loads of happiness, love, good health and success

You may think that you are just another actress
But there is something truly special about you
Your eyes burn with a fire
That refuses to die, no matter what
Your expressions are priceless
If magic truly existed
Your smile would have worked like a love potion
Sweeping me off my feet
And into your outstretched arms
When it comes to acting, though
You show a wide range of emotions
Happy, sad, angry
Confused, depressed, disappointed
And whatnot!!
You are truly the Queen of Mollywood
And the Rising Star of Kollywood
However, success hasn't gone to your head
You are humble and unassuming by nature
But you don't have a filter
When it comes to expressing your views
Something that I can totally relate to
All in all, your mere presence
Has the capacity to render me speechless
And I am ready to watch any movie of yours
Irrespective of the genre
You are the reason I am able to smile
Through all the pain I face in life
Of course, I am sure you have thousands of ardent admirers
But you mean the world to me
Just remain the way you are
Keep chasing your dreams
And I am sure you will do wonders
Take care and wish you all the very best!!

You are not exactly a sibling of mine
However, you are my sister
And that's all that matters, according to me
What would I do without you?
I rant and rant
Knowing that you are an amazing listener
And a shoulder to cry on
However, it is providing sound advice
Where you are really in your element
Not to mention, you don't beat around the bush
Nor do you sugarcoat things
Both of which, are qualities that resonate with me particularly well
Moreover, you always offer a fresh perspective
Whether it be work or personal stuff
Best of all, though, you are ice cool
I seriously don't know how you manage to do it
Because, in these two months, I've been behind you
And there hasn't been a single week
When you haven't been subjected to a barrage of messages
Would I have taken such liberties with you
If I weren't sure how you would react?
The answer is a resounding no
Moreover, not only are you cool with it
You also come up with solutions
For each and every problem
As I write this, things are looking up
And in no small part due to you
I'm extremely grateful to God
For giving me a sister like you
As I said earlier, what would I do without you?

You people never took me seriously
For you, I was just a problem child
Who needed to be molded
According to your whims and fancies
You never saw me as an individual
Who has his own thoughts, feelings and emotions
My opinions never mattered to you
You wanted me to improve my verbal communication
As well as my body language
But you never even tried to understand me properly
It never occurred to you
That there is a reason why I am different
Or even if it did, you never truly cared
What bothered me the most, though
Was the fact
That you believed you were acting in my best interests
Of course, it was my mistake
Not to leave this accursed country
While I had the chance
And seek my fortunes elsewhere
A mistake I may probably regret
For the rest of my life
Anyway, as Arabella Figg once said
"There's no good crying over spilt potion"
I was a fool to listen to you
But I have progressed in life
Far more than you would've expected me
And not because of you
But in spite of you
Well, I would love to meet you one of these days
And prove to you
That verbal communication is overrated
Just like you yourselves are
We autistic people can do equally well, if not better
As compared to you neurotypicals
Who are obsessed with correcting others
Well, please look into the mirror
And just leave us alone
Worse than an enemy, is an NT with a saviour complex
Well, we can see right through you
You may think you are being kind and empathetic
However, in reality, you are just a bunch of condescending wankers
Who believe they are always right
Well, there is nothing wrong in having your own views
Just try not to force them down our throats
I will end on this note
Autistic people are human beings too
It is time you learned to appreciate that

You are seen as weird
People often call you "Loony"
But they couldn't be more wrong
Yes, you are indeed different
But then, every individual is unique
And I like you as you are
With all your pros and cons
Yes, you may believe in things
Which do not really exist
But then, who doesn't?
What truly matters
Is the fact that you are a beautiful human being
With a heart of gold
Who doesn't judge anyone
Sees people as they are
Doesn't shy away from speaking uncomfortable truths
Is modest to a fault
And last but not the least
Values friendship above everything else
You know, I can relate to you
I am also different
And got bullied for that
Just as you did
However, your mental strength is remarkable
After losing your mother at a very young age
That too due to a freak accident
You have shown the courage and fortitude
Not to mention, resilience and tenacity
To carry on with your life
Do your best to excel at magic
Display the natural curiosity and aptitude for learning
Which is expected of every Ravenclaw
Develop and sustain friendships
And finally, put your life on the line
In order to try and make the world a better place for all
You are not only a true Ravenclaw
But also possess the courage, nerve and daring of a Gryffindor
And the loyalty and sense of justice of a Hufflepuff
You only lack the cunning and ambition of a Slytherin
Not to mention, you were kidnapped and held hostage by Death Eaters
That too for a few months
And somehow emerged almost unscathed
After such a traumatic experience
You really are an incredible witch
Please remain the way you are
No matter what people say
And I will be a fan of yours
Until, as Neville would say, "Hell freezes over"

Though you didn't exactly give birth to me
You raised me, right from the start
Ensured that I was always happy
Took me to countless places
Sent me to the best schools possible
Put up with my tantrums
Scolded me when I was out of line
And at the same time, pampered me every now and then
Moreover, our bond strengthened over time
I began to share things with you
That I'd previously shared only with Amma
And I found, to my delight
That you were an equally good listener
Understood me to a great extent
And showed a lot of empathy
Especially during crisis situations
Such as my divorce
I really enjoyed our trip to London
Which brought us, if possible, even closer
Of course, I also had the company
Of my sister and a couple of relatives
However, it was mainly due to you
That I had such a good time
I'll end on this note
Please be the way you are
And wish you a very Happy Father's Day in advance!!

I have never met you
And you don't even know I exist
But you have cast a spell on me
From which it would be very difficult to recover
Your eyes blaze with an intensity
That can even melt steel
Your smile is so beautiful
That it cannot be surpassed
Even by that of Mona Lisa
Your laugh is so musical
That even the songs of AR Rahman
Would pale in comparison
Your hairstyle is an art in itself
Your dress sense is so impeccable
That it would put even the finest Italian designers to shame
And last but not the least
We come to your acting
A Sri Lankan Tamil dancer *** revolutionary
In the movie "Jagame Thanthiram"
A humble and yet powerful boatwoman
In "PS1" and "PS2"
A fierce wrestler with short hair
Forced to become a submissive housewife with long hair
In "Gatta Kusthi"
And finally
A teacher dealing with troublesome students
As well as impending layoffs and rejected marriage proposals
In "Archana 31 Not Out"
Given any kind of role, you play it to perfection
Born with oodles of natural talent
You nevertheless refuse to rest on your laurels
And put your heart and soul
Into the profession which you hold so dear
You are an inspiration to one and all
Forced to do an MBBS
By your extremely conservative parents
You have nevertheless the courage
To break free of the shackles placed on you
And pursue your own dreams
What's more, the risks you have taken off
Have ultimately paid off
You are the numero uno of present day Mollywood
And flying high in Kollywood as well
Yes, you have cast a spell on me
But it was a spell, that I refused to resist
And rightly so

I initially came to know you through Tamil
This was more than eight years ago
Since then, a lot has happened over the years
You and Tamil are one of my favourite couples
The understanding between the pair of you
Is deeper than the Pacific Ocean
And stronger than the Rock of Gibraltar
You are not only a very caring husband
But also a proud father
Of a very spirited child
Who is rather naughty
But at the same time, rather sweet and innocent
I am extremely thankful to you
For taking such good care of my best friend
But it's not just about Tamil
You yourself are a good friend of mine
Always supportive and encouraging
I can never forget the time
When you and Tamil were instrumental
In saving me from a disaster of a marriage
You are also extremely hardworking
And put your heart and soul into your profession
Please remain the way you are
Keep rocking and see you soon!

I've known you for close to two years
We've had a great rapport as colleagues
Though I am technically your senior
I've always seen you as an equal
In fact, we often think on the same lines
You've helped me out on numerous occasions
And in turn, I too have helped you
More times than I can count
I can never forget your words of encouragement
When I was going through a difficult phase last year
And after meeting you in person
We've learned a lot more about each other
For some reason, I feel I can tell you anything
Whether it be professional or personal
You are extremely cool and level headed
And capable of handling any situation
On top of that, you have a fun side as well
Which ensures that a conversation with you would never be boring
Not to mention, you've suffered quite a few losses
Which has made you battle-hardened
As far as I know
Nothing is impossible for you
You are also very warm and friendly
And thus talking to you
Feels like talking to a family member
You are not merely a colleague
But also a good friend and sister
Please be the way you are
And continue to do your very best
That's all I have to say for now

You may not remember me
As it has been ages
Since we last spoke
However, I probably won't be able to forget you
Right from the moment we met
I was drawn to you like a magnet
You were shy to a fault
And extremely sweet-natured
As I got to know you better
It didn't matter to me
That though you were a Tamilian
You spoke only in English
Because you were a great listener
And when you did speak
You were able to articulate your thoughts
Better than almost everyone in our college
Your mere presence was enough
To ensure that I didn't miss a single class
Except when my health was down
It is often said
That people lose focus
After falling in love
However, on the contrary
Thanks to you, I was able to develop extra focus
And achieve better grades
You inspired me
In a way that no one could have done
We once had a debate
On a rather forgettable movie
It didn't matter that our views were different
What mattered was your energy and intensity
And that fact that you took time out
To debate with a person whom you didn't know very well
You even taught me some tax calculations
Of course, it was a case of unrequited love
But totally worth it
And what was even better
Was the fact that you had known all along
And yet didn't shy away from talking to me
You really are one of a kind
As I mentioned earlier , I will never forget you

Ever since I watched you act in the movie "Jagame Thanthiram"
I knew there was something special about you
You took on a very complex role
And brought a lot of character into it
Next came PS1
Though your role was limited
You did full justice to the character of "Poonguzhali"
Right from the moment you emerged from the water
To your feisty dialogues with "Vanthiyathevan"
However, your finest hour
Came in the film "Gatta Kusthi"
Where your character "Keerthi" had to undergo a number of transformations
From a fierce wrestler with short hair
To a simple housewife with long hair
And back
The scene where you singlehandedly fought off all those armed goons
Is one I'll never forget
For the rest of my life
Then we come to the movie "Archana 31 Not Out"
Though, in my opinion, there wasn't anything remarkable
About the movie as a whole
You again did full justice to your character
Right from the travails of your job as a teacher
Including handling a class full of troublemaking students
And dealing with a lot of uncertainty
Due to the impending layoffs
To facing a number of rejected marriage proposals
For all of which you assigned cricketing terms
And finally the ****** scene
Where you delivered a speech
That brought goosebumps to one and all
You are not only an amazing actress
But also a wonderful human being
Bold and brutally honest
And humble and down-to-earth at the same time
Yes, you don't know me
Nor would you have even heard of me
But I can say with a lot of pride
That I will always be a fan of yours

You come from God's own country
And radiate such a beautiful aura
That, unless my eyes are deceived
It seems that you are God herself
Just kidding, you are a human being like any other
A rather beautiful one, though
Your smile is so divine
That it can melt even the hardest of hearts
Your laugh is so infectious
That it can send the entire planet
Into a fit of violent giggles
Your glare is so intense
That it can even **** Lord Voldemort
Faster than it takes to utter the words "Avada Kedavra" !!
Your Tamil accent is so cute
That even a newborn baby would pale in comparison
Your English is so brilliant
That it would put even the Oxford dictionary to shame
Your acting is so superlative
That it would surpass even the drama of Shakespeare plays!!
And finally, I have to shamelessly admit
That I wish I were born in an alternate universe
Where you and I could be together
For the rest of our lives
Because you are not only an accomplished actress
But also a beautiful human being
The heroine who captured my heart

To quote Athos from "The Three Musketeers"
"You are not a woman
You are a demon escaped from Hell"
When I first met you as a colleague
I made the mistake
Of getting friendly with you
When I should have ensured
That our relationship was going to be strictly professional
Of course, you had your own ways
Of charming those whom you came in contact with
That is something for which I have to give you credit
Albeit grudgingly
And you were an expert
At playing the victim card
Nevertheless, after I changed jobs
I thought I had seen the last of you
However, you came back into my life
As unexpectedly as the recent rains in Chennai
Initially, it seemed kind of sweet
However, I should have realised sooner
That you had certain ulterior motives
Unfortunately, I got fooled by your sweet talk
And started helping you financially
Because you looked up to me as a brother
I never doubted you in the slightest
Which was probably the biggest mistake of my life
You took advantage of me
In the worst way possible
And kept draining my bank account
Your lies kept getting taller and taller
And I kept believing them
Because, you had me well and truly under your thumb
However, even the most credulous person in the world
Can develop suspicions at some stage
Thus, after years of being in a psychological coma
I finally managed to wake up to the harsh reality
And told my family everything
Of course, with the help of a dear family friend
After we finally confronted you
You signed a written agreement
Promising to return all my money
Within a certain deadline
That deadline has long since passed
And you have not paid even ten percent of your dues
What is worse
Is the fact that you are absconding
And giving absolutely nonsensical reasons
Which even an utter fool would find it difficult to believe
You ruined my life
Destroyed my happiness
And shattered my self-confidence
Is this the way you treat a person
Whom you have addressed as "brother"
Not once, not twice, but several times?
I am giving you one last chance
Not for your sake
But for the sake of humanity
You had better take it
Because, if not
Then you will soon find yourself in prison
Again, to quote Athos
"You are not a woman
You are a demon escaped from Hell"

I had really hoped
To forget you, once and for all
However, it seems you are always hovering around
Like an annoying little mosquito
Ready to **** the blood
Of anyone and everyone in your vicinity
And looking for that perfect window of opportunity
To mock my shortcomings
Which apparently do not exist
For your precious little "best friend"
Who has a smug smile on his face
Ready to defend you at the drop of a hat
Of course, it will only be a matter of time
Before you tire of him as well
Because, people exist merely for your needs
Which are about as realistic
As Telugu action movies are
Therefore, it is a huge irony
That you were my first female friend
Of course, I am not sure you understand
What friendship truly means
Because, you promise one thing
And then proceed to do the exact opposite
May God help that unfortunate soul
Who truly cares for you
Because s/he will be in for a rollercoaster ride
Which will never end
Until your delusional fantasies are satisfied
By the time that eventually happens
S/he would be dead
Anyway, it was you
Who wanted to be friends with me in the first place
I, being a naive idiot
Readily accepted your offer of friendship
And was with you
Through thick and thin
However, you cut me off
When you needed me no longer
I apologised to you a number of times
Not because I did anything wrong
But because your inflated ego required a massage
Alas! To you, I was nothing more than a problem child
Whom you wanted to mould
According to your whims and fancies
I was never an independent human being
Who could make his own choices
And live his life on his own terms
Your own Brahmin sensibilities matter more to you
Than a friend who genuinely cared for you
Unlike "Mr Smug Face", whom I had mentioned earlier
You destroyed my self-confidence
And turned me into an insecure wreck
God knows how many more people exist
Whom you've treated as "use and throw"
Just keep one thing in mind, though
There will surely be a time
When the tables are turned
And it is you who will become a lonely wreck
Then there will be noone
Who is ready to rush to your aid
Because, you will be forgotten; once and for all
As you deserve to be

Your expressions can ****
Before one can even utter the words "Avada Kedavra" !!
Your eyes sparkle with an intensity
That can melt even boulders
Your smile is filled with a dazzling light
Which is so bright
That it can even turn Hell into Heaven
As we are often told
"Laughter is the best medicine"
Well, your laugh is so divine
That it can even bring people back from the dead
Your sense of fashion is an art in itself
And can even put London and Paris in the shade
Most of all, you gave up a career in medicine
In order to pursue your dreams
With a courage that would have made Godric Gryffindor proud
I can't wait to watch you on the big screen
Because there is absolutely no one
Who can do justice to the character of Poonguzhali
With such a silken grace
As I am sure you will

We have never actually met
I mean physically, of course
But we've got to know each other well
Over the course of six years
When we had our first conversation
I looked up to you, as a senior colleague
In fact, I still do
Especially considering the way you handle certain clients
Who have given us a lot of trouble, over the years
And the way you manage your work
Given that you have to deal with a lot of family matters as well
Is nothing short of exemplary
However, you are not just my senior
You are a good friend of mine too
That's why I rant a lot
As far as work is concerned
Because I know you will listen and understand
And many a time, I find
That I feel much better
After sharing my issues with you
Of course, it works both ways
I am always ready to listen
When it is your turn to rant
Hopefully, it is only a matter of time
Before we eventually meet
Nevertheless, our relationship goes on to show
That it is definitely possible
For two people to be good friends
Without meeting each other face-to-face

It has often been said
That true love doesn't exist
But that doesn't stop me from dreaming
After all, I am a romantic
And it's not like I believe in true love
Only because I've read about it in books
Or seen it happen in movies and TV shows
In fact, I've experienced it myself
Not once, but twice
On the first occasion, I was young and naive
Enjoying life to its fullest
And when the love bug bit me
It was one of my happiest moments
I looked forward to every single day
And for the first time in many years
I actually made a concerted effort
To excel in academics
However, to cut a long story short
I missed the bus by a mile
When it came to confessing my feelings
Right, let's come to the second occasion
Technically, it was an arranged marriage
But for me, it was as good as a love marriage
Because, after our engagement
I grew so deeply attached to the girl
That I was blind
To all the red flags thrown at me
Every now and then
Again, to cut a long story short
It eventually ended in a divorce
However, as I've mentioned before
I have not lost hope yet
After all, time is still on my side
However, I need to draw a line somewhere
Firstly, being open and honest
Is an absolute must
I will tell you everything
But I expect the same from you as well
Secondly, I am looking for someone
Who is loyal till the very end
I will be with you
Through thick and thin
But if you cheat on me
Then it's over, once and for all
And finally
You need to accept me as I am
With my pros as well as cons
That includes understanding my autism
And the limitations it places on me
Especially as far as social interaction is concerned
Of course, it works both ways
I am not looking for a perfect person either
After all, if it's perfect
Then it's not true love
And one of the major reasons I still believe in true love
Is that it's full of imperfections
That's what makes it so endearing
And so human

We started off as colleagues
At that time, working from home was something
That was almost unheard of
Yet, we met only once or twice
In an entire month
Because you stayed really far away
Moreover, you had a family to run
We'll come back to that later
Anyway, when we met for the first time
I found you to be warm and friendly
And I said to myself
"Here's someone I can trust
Without a second thought"
I also loved your dedication to work
However, it wasn't as though you were a workaholic
On the other hand, you were quite lively
And ensured that our spirits were high
Even when there was a lot of work to be done
As I had mentioned earlier
You had to take care of work
And manage your family
At the same time
A daunting task, without an iota of doubt
Especially when there are kids involved
As well as in-laws!!
However, the way you handled the pressure
You almost made it look easy
Though the reality was vastly different
Moreover, we had some great times
I remember one occasion in particular
When we had a team lunch at Canto
The pizza we ate was extremely delicious
And full of veggies as well
Another thing that is impossible to forget
As far as that day was concerned
Was the fact that it just kept on raining!!
It was really good that you left early
Because it took me three hours to reach home!!!
I always enjoyed working with you
Because you somehow managed to find a way
To keep boredom and stress at bay
Especially that RM-Wealth mandate
On which we both struggled like anything
But you ultimately managed to close it
Hats off to your dedication, patience and perseverance
Then the pandemic struck
While I was dealing with work pressure
As well as the cloud of uncertainty
That hung over my indefinitely postponed marriage
Your words of wisdom helped me stay afloat
In those troubled waters
Meanwhile, you took a sabbatical
Thus, I missed you at work
But felt relieved for you
Since you finally got the break you deserved
After working so hard, for so long
Nevertheless, I was glad when you returned to work
Because you are not just a colleague
But a really good friend of mine
Of course, we haven't met in the last three years
Since you've permanently shifted to Udaipur
However, a friendship with such a strong foundation
As ours is built on
Does not require proximity in order to survive
Coming back to work
Just about a month ago
We were working on a huge research project
Which was extremely challenging and stressful
Yet again, you were a source of comfort for me
And ensured that I was able to keep my wits about me
And complete my work on time
Without letting pressure get the better of me
Moreover, at the same time, you did a great job yourself
Once again, hats off to your dedication, patience and perseverance
Just be the way you are
Because you are a friend to treasure

As we all know
Life is full of ups and downs
However, a lot of people advise you
To see the positive side of everything that happens
Well, it's not exactly an impossible task
But easier said than done
For instance, if you've lost someone close to you
You'd be hard-placed to find any positives in that
After all, once someone is gone
S/he is gone forever
And all that remains of him/her
Is the memories that you carry with you
Of course, you do need to move on
And you become stronger in the process
But that's still nothing
Compared to the grief you've gone through
And the pains you've taken
In order to overcome that grief
And get your life back into top gear
Anyway, let's take a less extreme example
Imagine you are in Recruitment
And handling an extremely difficult requirement
Where finding the right people
Is even more difficult
Than booking a tatkal ticket through IRCTC
You do your very best
Search frantically in various portals
Talk to a truckload of people
Face rejection after rejection
But refuse to give up
And keep on searching
As well as talking
Till you somehow manage to find a couple of relevant candidates
Who are genuinely interested
However, your client rejects them
And thus you are back to square one
Well, there is a positive side in all this
You've now got more clarity on what the client wants
Or rather, doesn't want
But look at what it has cost you
All those hours you've spent
Are not going to come back
And on top of it
The requirement has become even more difficult
So, all those people who advise you
To see the positive side of everything that happens
Need to understand, once and for all
That it may be easy for them to say such things
But actually following their own advice
Is a different matter altogether

This incident happened more than five years ago
It was a Tuesday
And I'd gone to office as usual
Which involved a long commute
From Powai to Lower Parel
By the famous Mumbai locals
A typically exhausting commute
Made worse by the fact that it was the month of August
And therefore I had to deal with the rains as well
Something seemed to be off
As far as that particular day was concerned
Quite a few of my candidates
Were not responding to my calls
And what was worse
Was the fact that it was raining cats and dogs
In fact, my boss, who was on the way to office
Got stuck somewhere in between
And ultimately gave up the ghost
Deciding to work from home instead!!
He also instructed me and my colleague to leave office
As soon as we were done with all our critical work
Since we both had brought our lunch
We decided to leave after eating
However, our troubles for the day
Were just about to begin
It was raining heavier than ever
Just as we left office
Accompanied by an acquaintance
Trains were not running on the Western line
Thus, we were forced to walk all the way to Currey Road
Instead of Lower Parel, which was much nearer
Meanwhile, my colleague, who was residing in Girgaum
Decided to take a taxi home
While our acquaintance gave me company
Since his home was near Sion
Which falls on the Central line
And is on the way to Vikhroli
Where I was supposed to get down
However, just as we entered Currey Road station
The enormity of the situation
Struck us with the force of a bullet
There was a sea of people
And a rope was placed in the middle of the platform
In order to control the crowd
On the left side of the platform, there was a local
Which was apparently stuck there for quite some time
And on the right, the track was heavily waterlogged
All these were ominous signs
That something was seriously wrong
Well, we boarded the local
And were lucky to get seats
It was a silver lining
In the darkness that was about to follow
The train was in no hurry to depart
Whenever I heard the sound of its motors
My heart would leap with a mixture of joy and relief
Since it seemed to indicate that we would start soon
However, it didn't take me long to realise
That all my hopes had been dashed
The fact was that the motors had to be switched on and off
Every now and then
Just in order to keep the engine running
In the middle of all the chaos caused by the rains
Yes, the situation was so chaotic
That a few reporters had a field day
Meanwhile, I checked in on my colleague
And his feeble voice told its own story
He had to walk all the way
From Mumbai Central, where the taxi was forced to drop him
Till his home in Girgaum!!
Moreover, our acquaintance invited me to walk with him till Sion
So that we could have an adventure!!
However, I was in absolutely no mood for such stuff
As all I wanted, was to reach home in one piece
No matter how long it took
However, the hours slowly tricked by
And the local showed absolutely no signs of moving
Again though, there was a silver lining
In the middle of all this darkness
A Marathi NGO magnificently rose to the occasion
And started distributing packets of food to the stranded passengers
It was truly like a godsend
And helped me keep my wits about
As afternoon turned to evening
And evening to night
While the water on the right side track
Was rising higher and higher
And it soon dawned on me
That the unthinkable was about to happen
That is, I had no choice
But to spend the night at Currey Road station!!!
Yes, it was an unpleasant situation indeed
But I decided to face it anyway
Since the station was a safe place after all
And as we all know
One is always safer in a crowd
Of course, sleeping wasn't going to be an easy task
I tried various positions
Each more uncomfortable than the other
Before finally dropping off to sleep
More out of sheer exhaustion than anything else
When I eventually woke up
Things were slowly limping back to normal
Trains had started moving in the opposite direction
Eventually we departed as well
Though at a snail's pace
And had a few unscheduled stops on the way
When we reached Sion, there came the next twist in the tale
We were stuck for one and a half hours
And I began to fear
That history would repeat itself
However, God was merciful enough
To ensure that it didn't happen
In fact, after we crossed Kurla
We resumed our usual pace
And reached Vikhroli in almost no time
I was home by around 11 am
And was greeted by my family
Who were thoroughly relieved
And also full of praise
Since I had maintained my cool
In such a difficult and unforeseen situation
Ultimately, it had turned out to be an adventure worth reliving
Even if not the kind of adventure
That the acquaintance had embarked upon
And wanted me to be part of

When you are stressed, upset
Angry, sad, depressed
Or just not in a good frame of mind
You usually turn to music
In order to calm your mind
And uplift your soul
Well, it is the same for me too
Except that just any music won't do
It has to be music composed by Harris Jayaraj
He comes up with songs
For almost all kinds of situations
Action, drama, suspense
Romance, love failure, family bonding
Comedy, friendship, school life, college life
Tragedy, war, crime
Urban, rural, semi-urban
The list is endless
His music has an undefinable charm
That makes you sit up and take notice
And appeals to the masses
As well as the classes
The softness of the instruments used
The variety of playback singers
And the unique fusion of Western and Indian music
Separate him from the rest
However, what he truly excels in
Are the melodies
Just listen to a few of them
And you'll feel like you've entered a different world altogether
You'll forget all your worries
And just live in the moment
In fact, that's how life should ideally be
Of course, he will also make you dance to his tunes
Just like a snake charmer
Except that the snake actually doesn't give two hoots about music
Rather, it focusses on the movements of the snake charmer
Anyway, coming back to Harris
For me, his music is the next best thing in the world
After trains and the mobile video game "Choices"
It always makes me feel better about myself
Like I can do anything in the world
Without getting swayed by the opinions of other people
Of course, there are other great musicians too
AR Rahman, Ilaiyaraaja, Hans Zimmer, John Williams
And top bands like Linkin Park, Evanescence, Boney M etc.
To name a few
However, as we say in Tanglish
Harris Jayaraj is "vera level"
And will always be

It's always good to make friends, wherever you go
After all, every new place has its set of challenges
And in order to overcome them
It's better to have someone at your side
As they say, you don't have to do everything on your own
Well, making friends may not seem all that difficult
But keeping them is a different matter altogether
There must be some common ground
The place where you meet
The company where you work
The college where you study
Your hobbies, passions etc.
And I can go on and on
However, the point is
You and your friend must be compatible with each other
Being an introvert, I don't have many friends
However, the few I do have
Can be entrusted with almost anything in the world
This poem is about one of them
We met as colleagues, six years ago
And hit it off almost from the word go
Thanks to a few common interests
Such as cricket, movies, food etc.
We even went to a storytelling event
Where he was given a chance to take the mic
And spoke about me and my passion for trains
What I particularly like about him
Is that he is very easygoing
And rarely gets angry or upset
Even when dealing with cranky clients
And he had a whole lot of them
Every client was a story in itself
We would bond while trashing these clients
Often over a cup of cutting chai
Down at the cafeteria
As the months sped by
We grew closer
Finding more and more common ground
In the form of issues we faced at work
Especially the frequent salary delays
And non-payment of incentives
We always had lunch together
Except when either of us worked from home
Eventually, my friend shifted to Pune
But we stayed in touch on a regular basis
In fact, we met on at least five occasions
And continue to speak over the phone
Almost on a monthly basis
Even after he got married, about a year ago
He, in particular, makes it a point
To call me every now and then
And we exchange news
About our respective lives
This close friend of mine is proof
That you don't necessarily have to keep meeting people
In order to maintain friendships
Of course, it is always good to meet your friends
But sometimes, all you may need
If you're missing someone
Is a simple phone call
And in this case
Our calls are usually long
Long enough to ensure
That we sustain our friendship, no matter what

I am one of those guys
Who are reticent at first
But open up, as you get to know them
And once you've loosened my tongue
There's no stopping me
As I will go on and on
Till you die of boredom
Jokes apart, I am autistic
Which means that I may struggle
When it comes to social interaction
And can often be absent-minded
However, on the brighter side
My long-term memory is really good
And autism doesn't impact my work in the slightest
I am a good listener too
You can trust me with secrets
And I'll take them to the grave
Without a second thought
You may mock me as much as you like
But lay a finger on my close friends
And I will send you back to your maker!!
On that warning note
It's time for me to wrap up this little monologue
However, if you've attended job interviews
You would know that they usually begin like this
"Tell me about yourself"
Well, if you want a suitable answer
Then use this poem of mine as a reference
Just joking, don't even think of doing that!!

You are used to being overloaded with work
That's what happens when you work in a startup
Especially a startup dealing in Recruitment
That too, not run-of-the-mill Recruitment
You specialise in niche roles
Thus, you need to invest a lot of time and effort
In order to pull off closures
Yes, a recruiter's life is never going to be easy
But Recruitment pales in comparison to Research
When you are working on a major research project
You are essentially taking part in an almost never-ending race
Against that elusive devil, Time
A race you can ill afford to lose
And the race track is far from straight
In fact, it is full of twists and turns
Some of them are even more dangerous
Than those hairpin bends you often encounter
While driving up the mountains
There are also numerous obstacles along the way
And to cap it all
There are no prizes for winning the race
On the other hand, if you lose
There will be a stiff penalty
In the form of losing the client, for ever
And what's worse
Is the fact that your credibility will take a massive beating
From which it will be quite difficult to recover
Life will never be the same again
So, you have to win, no matter what
Of course, you are used to working hard
Whether it be Recruitment or Research
So, you put your best foot forward
And work out of your skins
Putting off sleep as much as possible
Even when your body is protesting vociferously
Against this blatant abuse
To add insult to the injury
Your laptop shows you the *******
And your phone literally dies
Sending you into a brainfade
That would have put even Australian cricketer Steve Smith to shame
Luckily, your father's presence of mind saves the day
But your troubles are not over yet
The harder you work
The more confusing the project gets
It's like being trapped in a maze
Except that it's a thousand times worse
Because the maze is controlled from outside
As if it were a puppet
With your boss pulling the strings
Thus, the harder you try to find a way out
The more you get trapped inside
With every passing hour
Hope slowly drains out of you
Until you are forced to admit
That all you can do, is pray
And keep praying for all eternity
Hoping against hope
That Harry Potter and his friends will save the day

After working hard for hours and hours
Days and days
Weeks and weeks
And months and months
One would have thought
That I deserved a break
Of course, a short one
But a break nevertheless
However, I was in for a rude shock
Instead of being given a break
I was assigned to a new project
And a huge one at that
Involving oodles of intense research
Followed by a truckload of calls
In order to extract critical information
From a bunch of highly reticent people
And finally
Drawing an extremely complicated chart
Yes, I'd done all this before
But that was nearly a year ago
And going through the same process, all over again
Was always going to be a herculean task
But hey, I was not going to give up that easily
That too right at the beginning of the project
So, I sat to work in right earnest
However, after a few hours of hard research
My head was spinning
And my eyes were burning
Thus, it was a relief to leave the office
However, there was still the small matter
Of commuting back to my home
By the dreaded Mumbai locals
I was squeezed so thoroughly
That, by the time I finally managed to reach home
All I wanted, was to crash on my bed
And sleep; for a long, long time
But hey, I decided to write this poem instead
In order to record my thoughts
And more importantly, provide an outlet
For all those bottled up feelings
So that, by the time the next day arrived
I would wake up with my batteries recharged overnight
Ready to tackle the monumental task in front of me
After all, as the oft-repeated cliche goes
It is better to try and fail
Than not try at all

There are many kinds of love
Romantic love, the most common
And also the most overrated
Family love, probably the most beautiful
And most unconditional as well
Platonic love, or friend love
Again, simple and unconditional
Something that has become very popular these days
Which leaves us with.....cousin love
Yes, one of the most underrated forms of love
Seeing as it is not frequently talked about
Well, most families stick together
So do best friends
However, there are a few things
Which you may not feel comfortable sharing with your family
Usually, the best option is to share such things
With your friends instead
Or rather, your best friend
But then, it is also possible
That you may not have a best friend
In such a case, your best bet would be your cousins
Cousins are part of your extended family
And they also know your immediate family well
Remember, you don't always have to choose between two extremes
Sometimes, you have to take a middle path
That's exactly where your cousins come in
Because they will listen to you fully
Without getting too emotionally involved or overprotective
And in addition, they may have suggestions
That might not have occurred to your family or friends
So, cousins are more important
Than most people might think
And it is high time
That we start showing love to our cousins as well
Along with family and friends, of course
But yes, not all cousins are the same
Just as it is better to have a select few close friends
With whom you can share anything
Rather than a big group of fair weather friends
It equally makes sense
To maintain close relationships with a select few cousins
Who mean the world to you
And always have time for you
Yes, cousin love is extremely underrated
But at the same time, very valuable
And something to be cherished, forever

In order to achieve results
You need to work hard
That should be easy enough to understand
The difficult part, though
Is how hard you need to work
Especially when it comes to Recruitment
You see, the nature of the profession is such
That you can't predict anything
Because everything depends on people
And every individual is different and unique
In his/her own and special way
Thus, luck is very crucial
When it comes to hiring people
There are times
When you work out of your skins
And still fail to achieve the desired results
Because luck is not on your side
There are also times
When you do the bare minimum of work that's required
And are able to achieve positive results
Because you are kissed by Lady Luck
On both cheeks
These contrasting scenarios are common
When it comes to hiring Investment Bankers
You spend the entire day calling people
But very few show interest
And apart from those who are not keen
There are quite a few
Who don't even bother to answer your calls
Or call you back
There are also some people
Who say "I will think about it and get back"
Either they get back with a negative response
Or they don't get back at all
That is to say, they just disappear!!
Thus, you have to start all over again
And since you also have tight deadlines
You are forced to work almost till midnight
And sacrifice a few hours of sleep as well
Since you have to go to office the very next day
And it does not end there
Your work forces you to stay at office till 7 PM
Almost an hour later than usual
And to add insult to injury
You get a mild reprimand
From the security staff
Of the business centre which houses your office
For not leaving on time
If you thought the worst was over
Then you were wrong
Because you are forced to work on Sunday as well
In order to ensure
That at least one resume is sent to the client
At the start of the week to follow
If only if you had some luck
That is to say
If even one of the candidates who had said "No"
Had said "Yes" instead
Then you'd have enjoyed a weekend free of work
And got some valuable rest in the process
For all your efforts of the previous week
Yes, in order to achieve results
You do need to work hard
But how hard you need to work
Is something that is almost impossible to answer
When it comes to Recruitment
Particularly when you are hiring Investment Bankers

The most beautiful relationship of all
Is not romance
It is friendship
Because there are no rules
No layers or complexities
Just shared understanding
Which is unconditional in nature
When I think about friendship
I think particularly about you
Whom I've known for ten years
Mind you, I've known quite a few friends
For a longer period of time
However, none of them are as special
As you are, to me
Very humble and unassuming
And yet having an enthusiasm
That is hard to match
When it comes to your favourite topics
Such as gaming, movies, animes and Hindu mythology
You have an easygoing and amicable nature
That would appeal to most people
Which is why I'm surprised
That you don't have a lot of friends
But then, it is better to have a few friends
Who mean the world to you
And would do anything for you
Rather than a large group of friends
Who are only there to share your joys
And are unable to support you
When you need it the most
I follow this principle to the tee
In fact, we both are in the same boat
You have always stood by me
In my hour of need
In fact, you are more of a family member
Than a friend
And I am really glad
That your family sees me the same way as well
In fact, your mother was a very close friend
Of my late maternal grandmother
And it is no coincidence
That Patti came in your dream
Just before she left for her heavenly abode
Our friendship is indeed a beautiful relationship
One that will last
As long as we ourselves do
Just be the way you are
And have a little bit more faith in yourself
Most importantly, thank you for coming into my life
And staying with me
Through good and bad times
Because that's what friendship is all about

Does expectation ever stop?
When you are at school
You are expected to get good marks
In all the subjects
Your life is decided
By your ability to memorise things
You are compared with others
Your cousins, your neighbours
Your friends, your classmates
All the time
You, as an individual
Are reduced to a mere shadow

Does expectation ever stop?
When you are at college
You are expected to achieve a high CGPA
Never mind the fact
That not getting arrears
Is practically an achievement
Especially as far as engineering is concerned
And if you happen to fail
People speak in whispers or hushed voices
When referring to you
And when you graduate
But fail to land a placement
You are seen as "that jobless guy"
And your character traits, whether good or bad
Turn out to be immaterial
In the mad race for status

Does expectation ever stop?
When you are a working professional
You are constantly asked about your salary
And it is compared
With that of every frigging relation of yours
Whether close or distant
Not to mention, neighbours
And their families as well

Does expectation ever stop?
When you are single
People constantly bring up marriage
As though it is something
That any decent human being must go through
And when you are married
Your wife also becomes a victim
Of all these crazy expectations
And you, as a couple
Are also compared to other couples

Does expectation ever stop?
When you get divorced
People keep poking and prying
Until they finally manage to extract from you
All the juicy details
But these vultures don't stop at that
They also want to know
When will your next marriage be
Your freedom means absolutely nothing to them

Does expectation ever stop?
When you are overweight
You are constantly advised
To go to the gym
Go for morning or evening walks
And again you are compared
With everyone who is slimmer than you
In the entire neighbourhood

Does expectation ever stop?
Being a good person is not enough
Having a good job is not enough
Earning a decent salary is not enough
Having a good family is not enough
In fact, nothing is ever enough
You practically need to become God
In order to satisfy the expectations
Of our ultra-greedy society
A society that never stops expecting
Until you are dead
Seriously, does expectation ever stop?

Failure hurts, no doubt
Especially when you are in Recruitment
A profession which depends on people
As much as India used to depend on Sachin Tendulkar
In the late nineties
But you know what hurts more than failure?
Imagine a T20 match
Where your team has dominated
From start to finish
And still managed to end up on the losing side
Due to a couple of bad *****
From your best bowler
In the very last over
Now, apply the same analogy to Recruitment
You have put your heart and soul
Into a particular mandate
Done a thorough search, through various portals
Called up as many candidates as possible
Presented quality profiles to the client
And lined up interviews one after the other
Everything has been worked out
To the tiniest detail
However, at the eleventh hour
The candidate backs out
Thus, you have no choice
But to start all over again
And this happens not once
Not twice
Not even thrice
But a frigging four times
However, you are no ordinary recruiter
You are a recruiter who possesses the heart of a lion
Thus, you prepare yourself for the long haul
Determined to do whatever it takes
To close this mandate, once and for all
And your efforts do pay off
Or at least, they seem to
For the client, it is a choice
Between two worthy candidates
However, as always, there is a hitch
One of the candidates has started showing signs of cold feet
While the other has to take a pay cut
That too a big one
This mandate now hangs on a knife-edge
So, it is not failure that hurts the most
But coming within an inch of success
After months of hard work
Only to have it slip through your fingers
At the very last minute

You wanted me to be your brother
To be a part of your extended family
I believed you
Since you seemed sincere enough
And got along well with most people
Thanks to your lively nature
And the dedication you seemed to show
As far as your work was concerned
I was in awe
Of the way you managed your life
Juggling work and studies every single day
And yet managing to keep a smile on your face
I should have got an inkling
That there was something amiss
However, thanks to my ignorance
Induced by my autism
And because you played your part so well
I never got to see your true colours
Until it was almost too late

You wanted me to be your brother
And I was indeed a good brother
I was always there for you
But never did I imagine
That you would take advantage of me
In such a callous and audacious manner
When you had that rather painful shoe bite
I took care of you
Even though my other colleagues advised me against it
But you were never truly grateful
In fact, you kept your distance
And came up with a silly sob story
To prevent me from interacting with you at office
I should have realised by then
What kind of a person you really were
Then again, I was woefully naive
And only wanted you to be happy
Even if it killed me from inside

You wanted me to be your brother
Well, I did my part
But you never did yours
When I first started helping you financially
I was doing it because I truly cared about you
And had a strong belief
That you would repay your dues eventually
Once again, like always
I was horribly wrong
You came up with story after story
And I kept believing you
Thanks to my incredibly credulous nature
And thus ended up draining my own bank balance

You wanted me to be your brother
Except that, instead of being your brother
I ended up being your sugar daddy
But then, like my mother said later
I was in a trance
And thus became your ATM
I have to admit, though
That you were a really good actress
Modulating your voice
To a mere shadow of what it usually would be
In order to induce me to believe
That you were suffering from blood infection
Just one out of hundreds of lies
That came out of your pathetic mouth

You wanted me to be your brother
Except that a true sister does not lie or cheat
That too, not once
Not twice
Not even thrice
But a thousand times
You have absolutely no idea
How you've ruined my life
And brought distress to my family
As well as a very close friend of mine
Through your utterly despicable actions

You wanted me to be your brother
And it was the biggest mistake of my life
To take you seriously
You even had the nerve
To make me travel for 16 km
In the hot sun
Right in the middle of summer
In order to meet you
Just so that I could keep trusting you
Or rather, keep getting fooled by your lies and half-truths

You wanted me to be your brother
But you lied to me all the time
And cheated me of my entire savings
After all that you've done
You still have the nerve
To beg for my sympathy
You are a disgrace to women
In fact, a disgrace to the entire human race
Even ISIS is far more worth sympathising with
Than you will ever be!!
Well, I would have ideally wanted you to suffer
In the most painful manner possible
But I need you to return all that you took
I don't care how you do it
Do it, and we can go our own separate ways
I can forget that you exist, and vice-versa
But until you do it
I will always be your biggest nightmare
In this entire planet
When I am good, I am very good
But when I am bad, I am the worst
So, you had better watch out
My so-called sister

How would I like to be loved?
It is a very difficult question
Because, though I appear, at first glance
To be "The Guy Next Door"
The reality, I assure you, is entirely different
Firstly, every individual is different
Secondly, I am autistic
And finally
There is so much about me
That you will get to know
Only if you are a good friend of mine

How would I like to be loved?
Well, let me tell you
Love is not all about candlelight dinners
Nor is it about *** in the bedroom
It is about being there for each other
No matter what
If I truly love someone
I would be ready to go to jail for her
Of course, not if it is for something ethically wrong
But you get the idea

How would I like to be loved?
If you have seen the Tamil movie "Thiruchitrambalam"
Then you would understand
If I were to say
That I want someone to love me
The way Nithya Menen loved Dhanush
In that amazing movie

How would I like to be loved?
If you've seen me at my worst
One of those days
When I am in one of my rages
And keep shouting and breaking things
Or I lose my focus at work
Due to all my insecurities
Rearing their ugly heads
Or I simply drown myself in my thoughts
Refusing to come out of my bed
Or I cry like a child
Drowning myself in a tidal wave of self-pity
And you still love me the same
As you did when I was at my best
Then it is indeed true love
Enough said

How would I like to be loved?
When I hear one of Harris Jayaraj's romantic melodies
And can instantly relate to it
I know that I am in love
And that love is real, not reel

How would I like to be loved?
If you ask me how was my day
And I go on and on
Droning about the technicalities of my work
Or cribbing about various issues
Such as candidates, clients or my boss
And you never tire of listening to me
Then I know you are truly in love
Also, if I keep asking you how was your day
Every single day after work
And you never once tire of answering such a mundane question
If that is not true love
I don't know what is!
And on that note
It's time to wrap up this little monologue
And return to hard reality

After a thoroughly enjoyable weekend
Which involved watching an animated science fiction thriller
Followed by a Football World Cup Final
Which turned out to be even more thrilling
I had to face the dreaded prospect
Of returning to work on a Monday
Yes, the notorious villain of the week
Which can ensure sleepless nights
Even for the strongest souls
Well, the day was actually not that bad
To begin with, at least
After a hot bath
Followed by an even hotter cup of filter coffee
Prepared by my dear mother, as ever
I had a simple breakfast
Consisting of a plate of chapatis
Mixed with some rather tangy marmalade
Thus, I was ready
To face the grind of work
Or at least, I thought I was
The reality turned out to be as different
As apples and oranges
It started with a few phone calls
However, the response was not flattering
Thus, I headed to lunch
In the hope of making some progress
In the second half of the day
However, I couldn't have been more wrong
The phone calls failed to achieve their purpose
As I was unable to obtain slots
For the interviews to be scheduled
Moreover, I was dealing with multiple stuff
At the same time
Which proved to be even more difficult
Than obtaining a seat in one of the IIMs
Time was playing a cat-and-mouse game with me
The closer I got to him
The more he would evade me
As the hours flew by
I kept meandering aimlessly
Without achieving anything tangible
By the time I finally got the hang of work
It was already well past 6 PM
And I felt as though I had wasted more time
Than a certain Sunil Gavaskar had done
In his infamous innings of 36 not out, off 175 *****
In the inaugural 1975 Cricket World Cup
Thus, I was thoroughly relieved
When the day finally ended
Returning to work on a Monday
Especially after a thoroughly enjoyable weekend
Is never good
Full stop

I thought you considered me a friend
You were always nice to me
But I am afraid
That I thought wrong
Well, being wrong has become as common
As India failing to win a global cricket tournament
Especially as far as people are concerned
Thanks to my autism
Though I was not aware of it
When I was in college with you all
I was always seen as different
Well, it is true that I am different
But I was never one of you
I was a lone wolf
Left to fend for myself
At the slightest hint of trouble
You never took me seriously
I was always the problem child
Who just needed to "grow up"
And then everything would be taken care of
It also didn't help
That I was a South Indian
Though my Hindi was decent
You always saw me as a "Madrasi"
But I saw you all as human beings
Not fair-skinned North Indians
Anyway, you must understand one thing
Friendship is not a joke
It is a serious relationship
If you can't be friends after college
Then you can never be friends at all
Don't call me a friend
And then take me for granted
Leaving me to drown
In a pool of my deepest insecurities
Which, by the way
Would never have been created in the first place
Had you possessed the guts
To be honest with me
Right from the start
Instead of playing your precious games
Just call me an acquaintance
And be done with it
Full stop

Recruitment is an utterly thankless job
Especially if you are handling an Investment Banking role
That too when working in a startup
You spend hours and hours
Searching frantically for candidates
Who possess the requisite skills and experience
Followed by days and days
Speaking to a plethora of candidates
Facing rejection after rejection
Watching your own confidence nosedive
After almost every conversation
And then gritting your teeth and continuing to burn the midnight oil
After you finally manage to share a few relevant resumes
By the skin of your teeth
You breathe a sigh of relief
Knowing that your job is half done
Everything runs smoothly from thereon
Till the offer stage
When the candidate decides to back out
Having received a better offer elsewhere
And you are back to square one
However, you resume the search
With a renewed vigour
And put your heart and soul
Into finding a suitable replacement
Your efforts are duly rewarded
However, misfortune strikes again
The candidate develops cold feet
And gets retained by his present company
You have to go back to the drawing board, yet again
However, you refuse to give up
And work harder than ever
Determined to be third time lucky
Alas! Fate turns its back on you, yet again
The client proves to be a tad too miserly
Thus pushing your candidate away
However, you continue to resist bravely
Against all odds
Determined to prove a point
More to yourself, than anyone else
However, history repeats itself
For the fourth time in a row
And you are left bruised and battered
In the face of a year full of bad luck
Which has brought you a record seven backouts
And all you can do now
Is to pray, and keep praying
For 2022 to end as soon as possible
Recruitment, is indeed an utterly thankless job

It is easy to talk about motivation
Nowadays almost everyone does it
In fact, being a motivational speaker
Has become a quite lucrative profession
However, actually motivating yourself
Is easier said than done
You may think I am being negative
Be my guest
I would rather be a pessimist
And thus risk being called a negative person
Than take a step
Into the pool of toxic positivity
Which is so deep
That even the Pacific Ocean
Can't hold a candle to it
Every time you raise an issue
It is brushed aside
With a mere flick of the wrist
As though it were a pesky fly
Buzzing around the dinner table
Whatever you're going through
Means nothing, absolutely nothing
To these motivation experts
Who keep gaslighting you at will
Until you forget that you even exist
These people brainwash the public
To believe that no one really has a problem
And that all problems are self-created
However, the reality is vastly different
Everyone has a problem
Or rather, a condition
Autism, ADHD, Down's Syndrome
Bipolar Disorder, OCD, PTSD
Selective Mutism, Paranoia, Depression
And I can go on and on
Of course, it varies by degree
From mild to severe
And from person to person
Nevertheless, a condition is a condition
And has to be acknowledged by everyone
Including these so-called motivation experts
Mental Health is indeed a serious issue
Especially in our country
And it is a real shame
That it has taken the suicide of a celebrity
For people to understand its significance
Of course, not everyone may suffer to that extent
So as to take such extreme steps
Instead, someone may lose his job
Another may be dumped by her boyfriend
Nevertheless, a suffering is a suffering
Even if the society doesn't consider it serious enough
As my therapist would say
When your brain chemicals function differently
As compared to those of the people around you
Motivating yourself is easier said than done
Especially in a country like India
Where the support system
For people suffering from mental health issues
Is still a work in progress

You may think you are special
Because you are rolling in money
And have lots of boyfriends
But the reality is as different
As chalk is from cheese
A person is special
Due to his/her character
Or what s/he does
You have a personality that is so shallow
That it would put even the Kardashians to shame
And that is saying something
You do not know the first thing about friendship
And yet consider yourself an ideal friend
To one and all
While you proceed to ghost someone
Whom you've known for years and years
All because of a silly comment
On a photo of yours on social media
Someone may be your BFF one day
And turn into a mere acquaintance the next day
For you, people are like bubblegum wrappers
To be used and thrown at a moment's notice
Of course, as we all know
There's no point in breaking your head over people
Especially in a our rather fickle-minded society
But when you act all high and mighty
As though you're always right
And everyone else is wrong
It really gets my goat
Again, you may think you are special
Based on money, good looks or the number of boyfriends you have
But all these will get you nowhere in life
Because, there will be a time
When you are in desperate need of help
And you will find
That the only people who can be of use
Are the ones whom you've already chucked

These are tough times
As far as Recruitment is concerned
Of course, Recruitment is never easy
Especially when you work in a startup
But a year like 2022
With backout after backout
And consequently rework after rework
Really takes the biscuit
Here I am
Without a single closure
In the last ten frigging months
And thus having my confidence shredded to pieces
One would think
That I badly need a break
In order to recharge my batteries
You, on the other hand
Decided to add to the burden
By assigning me, not one
But three extra mandates
Mandates that are not only difficult
But also rather time-consuming
And require dealing with a client
That has tested our patience
On multiple occasions
And on top of that
I have to come to office as well
Of course, it is all smooth sailing
As far as the onward commute is concerned
Thanks to the ever reliable AC local
The return, however, is a different ballgame altogether
Because you always make me late
Thus, I never manage to catch the AC local
And by the time I reach home
I end up hating you to the core
You are lucky magic doesn't exist
Because if it did
You would have been dead a long time ago
I would have seen to that
Anyway, coming back to reality
I have always been tolerant
But, as my grandfather would say
There is a limit to everything
And if you are expecting me to work on Saturdays as well
You are exceeding that limit
And then I will have no choice
But to leave, once and for all
As I've already mentioned
I have always been tolerant
However, my tolerance now runs thin