We died that day
I can see our mausoleum now
Stacked stones
Memories, overlapping
Beautiful and meaningless
Wasted space in heads too young
Too young to see the facade of this house
Falling away
As you fell away from one another
In different beds now
But mommy and daddy's would always love each other
Right?
Permanence was supposed to be spelled in your names
I dared not think it any other way
Collapse was hearing my fathers cry
From seeing mine
Choked by some unseen force
I think we can call guilt
We weren't meant to stay together
Alive
This family
Fate fiddled with the idea
Fabricated smiles
Serving dinner to the ties of your marriage
Us
No
That day aged us years I swear
Reality thumped in chests
Where blind faith once lived
Zane was old enough to know
Family meeting meant goodbye
Zara young enough to hold concern only in our puppy
Asking with a quivering lip where he might go?
I excused myself
From the room
The idea that this was real
And it must've been my fault
I thought
The blame must live in me
I see the sorrows in my parents eyes
I know the blame must live in me
Somehow
How could I have known?
The good in this
Seeing my mother's smile light up in another man's eyes
Someday
And now we're buying our new house
To replace the old one
Building it with empty stones
We've yet to make memories of
My new step sister
A step mother  
And none of my fathers cries
How could I have known
I wouldn't still be bringing flowers to the steps of our mausoleum
That life moves on
And how beautifully bittersweet that could be

you are still my zing
my one and only
the best and worst thing
thats ever happened to me

you are my angel
you are my butterfly
you taught me to fly
but not in hell

you are the spark
you are the haven
you put me in the dark
but also put an end

now i am in the dark again.

My hair is growing longer
I've lost weight - but not the bad way
this time
My new necklace
Your beard is longer too, oh it curls
What's that? Did you get that at work?
It doesn't look serious
I have nightmares
My artwork
Band logos
Smoke with me
Skylines
Tattoo ideas
Michelle's saggy ****, drawn hastily and without detail
but you prefer it that way
Oh how cute
your dogs are trying to steal your pillow
I guess I can be lonely
I'll fight with nobody
except for my stuffed animals for the
empty space

You are in as little a hurry
This morning
As you've ever been.
Re-engage your safety.
Holster your stress.
Your car is a gun.
Your key the trigger.

Two ton hollow-points flying
Down every street in the world; lead
In search of potential tissue.

The father witnessed his own heart
-Shape and weight of a five-year-old-
Break into molecules midplay
On the parking lot
Under a blind reverse.
Perhaps the groceries blocked her view.
Clip emptied in a split second.
Your car is a gun.
Your car is a gun, a child's tunnel vision
As narrow as the barrel of a .22.
Aim carefully, away from people.
Squeeze, don't pull. You hold lives with
Your steering wheel. Destinies under your feet.
Every turn you make has room for tragedy.
Your car is a gun.
A hot, smoking gun.

You are in as little a hurry
This morning
As they are to put something so
Small in the ground
And return with heavy unhealable hearts
To a house
That won't see them smile
For another five.