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mei Apr 2021
i stayed home from school that day
because i was exhausted and lacked sleep
or maybe it was because i didn't really feel like going

it wasn't because i was texting you
all night saying goodbye, or
because i simply didn't feel like i could
continue on living

at least that's what i tell myself
when i hear three knocks on my door and
it's eleven in the morning and i'm
still in my pajamas

it really could have been
because i wanted to sleep in, which is
what i tell to the police officer as he sits down
across from me and asks me if i'm okay

of course, do i not breathe before you?
at least that's what i tell him
in my mind, the same little phrase
i have told myself all the times before

and he looks at me and he does not smile
or look away or crease his eyebrows
and i do not ask for a reaction
or people begging at my feet

we both know what is happening here
we both wish we didn't
mei Feb 2020
under the crescent moon
i tell you that i love you,
a glimpse of your eyes
                               filled with stardust
you tell me you love me too
mei Jan 2020
you love me as a friend
i love you like i have never loved before
mei Jan 2020
i think i've fallen into you
or maybe i have just stopped at a dead end
somewhere in the maze of your eyes
too afraid to find the exit
for i may never be able to return again
(i want to return again)
mei Jan 2020
love me or leave me
which will you choose?
both bring pain
one sooner than the other
but at least you will be my muse
mei Jan 2020
you make me feel blue
not from melancholy,
but from the way you have
become the sun
and i wish to be the skies
that always exist, comforting you

so that you will always have me,
a love that (i hope) you know is true
for s
mei Jan 2020
when you tell me you love me
do you feel it from deep within?
or are these words disposable
the same way in my eyes
i have always been
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