Is it finally time to start a family with the woman of my choice?
Someone with class that treat others with respect?
Who, one day, will carry my offspring.
Teaching our sons how to become Kings & our daughters to evolve into Queens?

Is it me trying to get recognized for my accomplishments?
A young black man, age 26, hustling for what's mine for the taking?
Surpassing my limits, accept new challenges, place my awards on the wall.
Prove my worth to the world.

Is it money or fame?
To be able to buy a brand new car? Or purchase a new house this year for mom?
Maybe get on TV & tell my story of how I survived.
Perhaps give wisdom or confidence to the next generation.

I remember the times when I met you.

—First time was at a frat party
—Second time was on a date
—Third time was at your momma’s house.
—Fourth time was heading back to your place.

Curly hair, mix heritage, thick in those jeans, cocoa butter skin tone.
Foreign language makes me weak in the knees
Especially when you role your “R’s” with your tongue.

How do you keep,
keep me dreaming
about you?

This feeling
I have is deep,
deeper than you know. It has me chasing after you.

Tell me what did you do to me, babe?
You put some type of potion all over me.
Hit me with something new babe.
Spiritual waves, have me feeling some type of way.
I want you for myself now, I can no longer wait.
Whatever spell you have me under, has me stargazing.

I dedicated my life
to stay by your side
respect our relationship & to always love you right,
keeping a vow to never cross any boundary line.
But you showed a different side.
An unexpected twist that brought tears to my eyes.
Your energy changed.
From positive to negative, this affection & demeanor wasn’t the same.
Anytime my friends called to check on me or hangout, you yell.
Cursing out my name as if I brought shame into our relationship.

Now I can’t breathe...

I can’t breathe because I’m traumatized,
I’m traumatized because I can’t socialize,
I can’t socialize because I ghosted my friends for you so now I hide in fear

You stole a peace of my mind to the point where I can’t even recognize who I am anymore.
Which causes me to feel less of a “Woman” inside.

But no more!
Times have changed

Somewhere along the road I found strength.
Gain the courage to move on & think about what’s best for me
rather than sink back into your arms.
See, I've learned that you never had power...
You were a simple weak man
trying to devour a Queen’s castle
rather control your own **** tower
like the lowlife peasant you are.

But now that you are gone,
it is safe to say
I am better without you in every way.
So stay your btch a_ off of my phone.
There’s nothing here for you, please leave me alone.
Your words mean nothin', so please hold your tongue &
don’t worry about the next man I f-k with
nor I am lovin'.
Just know it will never again be you,
you’re no longer a discussion
highly irrelevant
good riddance , peace out boo boo.

I vision you here, in this hot shower with me.
Washing your body down with Dove Soap.
Creating circular motion on your chest as you smile,
while I grab your waistline.
Feeling all over your back
arms
kissing your stomach &
touching places I know I shouldn’t.

Temperature rises, the air is foggy.
I hear your voice in the mist whispering my name.

This moment is so surreal ,
until the phone rings on the counter.

& then I open my eyes,
turn off the shower,
realizing my mind is playing tricks on me.