The longest of nights lasting an eternity
As tics and tocs echo off these empty walls
Nothing moves or even vibrates
Besides the spontaneous quiver
Of my bottom lip
Dancing alone to the sadness

Dust resides in place of corners
Of every picture frame you took
Leaving hallow memories
To haunt this dreadful house

Staring at our bed
Still made from the last time
We both slept in it

My heart collapses
As my body follows
With a rush of pain
Stabbing into my mind

My dearest friend where can we run to?
Please take my hand
And show me where the pain stops
Or where the road ends
Or how the light dies

You've always been there for me
And hid away when I forgot
But I need you now more than ever
Please don't leave me here all alone

I may not be as strong as I once thought
And this scares me
Because you may be my only friend left

You want to know the truth?

I lost a part of me that day
My body shutting down
As the convulsions started
I guess that's what happens Right?
Eighty two capsules of Tylenol
Dissolving rapidly in my stomach

As the seizures started
I broke my little brothers lamp
Crashing to the floor
muscle spasms kept me awake
Just long enough to think...

Think of my mistakes
And the reasons I wanted out
The flashes of your face
And the shades of your smiles

But till this day, I'll never forget
Not once was I afraid
Not once did I regret
I truly believed I was going to die
And I had accepted it

Sometimes I wonder
If a part of me did die that day
Left behind to wither away
Haunting me from time to time
Calling me to come back

And to be honest
I miss you old friend
But I still have things to do
So you'll have to wait a little longer
Before we can hold hands once more

Splattering droplets
Calm the skin
As each molecule
Fissures under the magnificent rays

Oh why have these bruises failed to heal
To exist as pastel
Smeared upon my canvas
Traversing along my veins
As roaring rapids
Claimed the cracks of the earth

Forgive my unforgiving tendencies
Latching onto your heavy soul
Dug so deep within yourself
My roots excavated your pain
And brought nothing but beauty
To this calm yet frightening world


Just breathe

Let us synchronize our hearts
As one
And our minds will forever follow

You grew onto me
As the gallant red wood
Binds with the earth
Morphing and mixing
Our roots intertwined
Clasping hands yet
Clashing organics
Without you I'm baron
Just endless desert
Awaiting your everlasting life


The contents may be under pressure
I think to myself
As I lay on this cold floor
Mismatched socks and a pair of gym shorts
One last jab at myself
To replace this fear with humor
the razor gouges my smooth skin
A quiet patter echoed throughout the house
The blood pooling at my thigh
pain slowly drowns away
Like a ship cracked at the hull
There is nothing left to do
But wait
I will not struggle towards the surface
I will not panic in the darkness
As my lungs fill to no return
I leave this cold world
No longer afraid
And no longer hurting
my aching heart rests
As a sun setting along the sea

Graves dug by robots built by man
As these hallways clutter
Air tainted by the breath of disease
Crashing rays of light shatter my thoughts
To love you
As another holds your hand
Give me this future you promised me
Amongst the chaos and pain
These imaginary voices control my life
Scripting when to bath and when to die
To void this re-entry ticket into life
Hurricanes crash as birds fail to fly
Hearts will stop and these cells will die
Actors run off script to tell us lies
Beneath melting ice of the unknown
Show us beauty yet spare us fate
As these flowers fail to blossom
Give us more time
To fix our mistakes

The way I fold my receipt after checking out
The song I turn to on my last rep
The reason I'm on season 6 episode 9
Why I pull the cookies out 3 min early
Why I still use a body pillow
Why I try to floss
The shoes I wear
The food I eat
The tears that flow
The heart that aches
The sadness that followed after you left
The rage I got lost in
The gambling
The drinking
The sobbing
My life

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