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anxiety comes as a haywire mind
a situation in your head
worlds away from everyone
words unsaid
scared to be anyone, much less yourself

but most of all
it comes
and it never really leaves.
Controlling my everyday life
Taking my heart and throwing it against the wall
Wrapping around in my head to consume my thoughts
Crying and screaming against my throat
Crashing and thrashing its way into my body making me shudder
When theres a knock at the door
Lighting fires to my insides
Making my hands shake so someone will notice im unbalanced
Life ***** and I want to leave this place people call home, because no where is home anymore and I cant feel safe unless I am free
If reason was kind.
It wouldn’t allow people
To go to hell in handcarts
Whilst it sits by pretty and dolled up.
It’d go out of its way
Lend a listening ear
Offer its counsel FOC
It’d compel its narcissistic ego
To allow it to attend to people’s issues.
It’d come out of its ivory tower
To see what the world’s “really” like.
But methinks reason’s unkind.
It’d rather have its wits around itself
Than waste time availing itself to people’s thorny issues.
It’d rather have us be blind to it.
i want to rescue
someone else
'cause i can't seem
to save myself.
******* ****
That's all there is to say
After a glass of whiskey
And a bottle of wine
And the fear that tomorrow
Things may not be better
So where do I go from here?
Since today is a down day
One of many in a row
And I thought I was getting better
*I thought
I was getting better

— The End —