That nameless spark
The one that starts in your diaphragm
you think it’s your breath,
but it gets stuck

Chest—hot
Breath—ragged
Heart—taiko beat

But you turned away...

“Didn’t want to start something”
You said

“Smart for you, sad for me”
I said

...Incompatible, I rationalized

What to do now?

Did we dodge a bullet?

Would your woundedness have moved
Through me and left a mark?

Your hesitation has.

“Everyone is complicated”
You told me after you kissed my neck

Do I stay soft?

Stay open?

I didn’t know when you said “everyone”
you meant yourself

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I was not interested in this. I know of this video clip well before. That i has written the application, constructed them, redirected doing it, along with starred in it a century periods. The idea bores others; I'm not saying attracted.In I actually consciously modify my believed to something more productive, way more remarkable, significantly more on positioning with the Paradisiaque Profile in which I seemed to be produced. It requires bravery and courage person to love. Seems much better to put into effect really being suitable as an alternative to developing serenity; that should be small wait for community that will cater to our demands; to utilize your distress views on the masturbator sleeves considering that other folks do not suit the anticipations. It needs will to visit our selves with the help of sincerity and even consideration; towards pull away our stamina via transforming into a injured person; to prevent blaming. An important vivid middle existence in your getting. The application really wants to provide in itself, to be lifestyle amorously in addition to joyously, to reside courageously.

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Well, that was one hell of a poem
That will never see the light of day
I’ll just hide it away
In a folder on my laptop
Marked
Not to be read
Unless I am dead
The curious will surely want to read it then

You need to separate the wheat from the chaff
The boys from the men
You need to separate the uncensored
From the censored
The undone from the done
You thought it
You wrote it
You spoke
There must be something you liked about it
If there is I don’t know what it is
I’ll return to it in the morning
When I’m mourning my awakening

There is nothing I like about it
There are no words I care about
There are no seasons that shine
Reasons that rhyme
No rhymes sublime
I have left it all behind
In the gloom of my mind

All the sparks have been extinguished
I think and think and think
It’s brought me to the brink
Where have I gone wrong
I reach down deep inside of me
But, can’t seem to find the way in me
I’ve lost my muse
I’m not amused, but I am
Without my inspiration
The emptiness screams at me
Exasperating my damnation

I can’t seem to take another step
The heaviness deflates me
That’s not me you see
On the floor
Please just ignore what you see
Step over me
Go around me
Let me be
Let me wallow in my pity
Pity, please
I can still be the witness to
My woundedness

In the solitude of my loneliness
Diving into my emptiness
The depressive blob finds me there
It spreads like the black plaque
Where ever it goes
Filling every crevasse
With what isn’t me
Phlegmatic globs of stickiness
Yet I can’t seem to separate from
it’s grasping crusty tentacles

it is me
it isn’t me
does it matter
when you’ve lost your inspiration
and you’re as low as you can go
and nothing seems to matter
the world spins on slow
you know it’s just a cycle
you’ll come back around
and you’ll land with
your feet on the ground
but, not now.

Have I given away my power
Why can’t I be the one
Who inspires me
Why am I not enough
Am I playing too tough
Too rough
You can be rough and tumble
Still, stumble and fall
I said
To no one at all

You like everything you are
Even when you’re subpar
Who’s to be the judge
Have you heard
No what
The judge retired from the bench
That’s not true
I knew he was lying
I have my spies
Who do the spying
Really
Yes really
That’s quite silly
I feel the fog lifting
I fear it’s lifting
Because it was so comforting
Like an old blanket
That’s so familiar
And that’s even sillier
I feel the fog lifting
Time to put my head
Under the blanket
And go on another mind junket

Gruesome clots
of concentrated tantrum
Donated air tubes
who function to ventilate
That can airrigate the condensed spaces

When properly running
Executing the wasteful obstructions
Which aren’t much fun
when freedom’s an outing
All this idling and itchy blood,
festering in a wet sponge,
In an open container,
Where walls hold daggers.
And the guides are all blinded to the path
To make my own path anyway
Just if we could find hold of the string
Which was the pull upon my stride
And my pride’s woundedness proves
A fallen walk upon the obstacles
So it appears, way, must stroll more rhythmically
Dropping the scholastic endeavors
Because it’s all becoming pleasure less routine
Tensions streaming through a dam
And now it’s all recycled
Plagiaristication, even in the present fiasco
Can’t a task be a task? A breath, a breath..

Infinite masks approaching the infernal sacrifice
Transparent as glass or crystal ware
Prepared upon the dinner table
But I forget how to swallow the liquid
And soothes aren’t soothing
For they all appear as deception..

for honest humility
and proper pride

my woundedness
not to hide

to flow out to others
and heal inside

to work again
O God! I cried

courage please
prayers for my bride

to endure to the end
until I've dared and died