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Phila Mdleleni Apr 2015
Be still for my heart has been stained with love,
For today I shall gain no pain tomorrow,
For in my death at night I smile,
And in my birth in the morning I smile again,

For my pains and worries are like miles away,
For love in my heart has become like passion,
For when I think about love I see vissions,

Vissions that come with ambitions,
For my nation today shall stop descrimination,

For we are as bold as uniting..
Written by :Phila Mdleleni
Karijinbba Jun 2019
Once Upon A Time
I once stood up ****
immortalized in photoshoots
as my lover's VENUS.
Down I laid in deep shame
more than to pose for
an unanounced **** Cannon
photo shooting spree there
upon a cut tree I stood prompted
to lay down on it.
A tree of life simulation a second chance to birth a new dream
the huge cut stump sadness
signifying our child lost!
Our magestic forest land dream
upon that Hill was born.
A new Adam a new Eve a new beginning.
Stonned by past orphaned wars
unawareness dormant beast
was the pain of denial my abandonment syndrome.
It all proved futile yesterday
but today I share my true story.
all awakened struggling to heal

I hate this car filled city
my heart breaks in loneliness
I surely must love the suburbs.
being sociable realizing my lossess
where i missed my marks

My secret friends are trees
ancient green cedar woods.
Others are masked behind this cyber mirror eagerly reading me
some even ask me, hey
How do you do?
To not let the dark
get to me!
commenting and cheering me
so, the mystic forest trees
see me, hear me
re-burrying my past secrets
and pots of gold in roots

I do love the woods now
that always had terrified me
since my dad was shot nearby
in our forest land's I was five .
I still hear the gun shots!
I hear my babies cries too
in the enemy's hands hurting

The stump became
my millionaire mystery bank
burrying all our cash loot as dowry
my grieving lover twin flame divine
with insignias it all had arrived carefully inscribed
"Great fortune to Believer"
"Fame true love to the adventurous clever digger beauty"
"Deathly curses, bad luck,
great calamity poverty to the
foolish desserter unbeliever"
urgently advising to
"Hurry up it's all time sensitive!"
yelled my fiancee's love letters.
A stump, a tree and a elite lover
among magestic tall green trees,
carved my fate today to return!

And in that mystic Hill far away
And once upon a time true magic touched me thus changing us both
and with this mystery to rejoice
life makes sense where love lost.
All trees now tell me bittersweet stories and I bitterly weep.

The stumps chopped trees
in the nearby streets hurt deeply
I was once that Queen bee of
Once Upon a Time
chosen to change Earth
where rich could marry poor
women not men would rule
Where wealthy share
their treasures earned
or inherited cheerfully so
changing lives by the score.

I was promised nine diamond tiaras
For each baby ours born of twin flame twin souls our "glued together baby."

Our Memoir book to linger forever linked by the magic of true love.
I found my old dream of dreams
my peaceful own Reign RDDBBA!
That was then joy happiness lost
it's life saving rejuvenating today.

Although the trees in
that forest lands adored me
they too detested me.
Covertly wearing masks too
furious with my dead calm silence
then misunderstood no more tonight
all tests buried to be worthy ofof joining my lover's world
Green yellow leaves thundering
in wind murmuring sad songs
no one but me can now hear
their frantic Psalmic cries;
Nature it seems it too
takes back as much as it gives.

Our bitter harvest dreams
burried abandoned sleeping
where our road fork bent in
as I laid posing his Venus of Urbino
in the **** back then;
stonned bewildered scared
feeling abandoned alone,
all by me as punishment seen!
All a secret remained a lifetime.
So heartbreaking it is.
the nagging pain won't subside
Without timely Second Chance Vissions
our awesome dreams
couldn't breathe in the face of reality
my lover's gap dividing.

In the end my tree of life sighs
as it burries my body
deep dead asleep
under its mighty living roots
the stump and the tree
left behind devour all
all whats left of me,
sigh.
~~~~~
By: Karijinbba
All rights reserved
revised a 6/29-19 /10-2020
In the end we matter only to those kindred souls who remember us in our true light understanding
our inner core loving us
as we were
in good and in bad times.
thanks for reading
Vladimir s Krebs Jul 2018
Her love is so intoxicating she paralyzes with her venom. The toxins are kicking in. She medicates my brain leaving the emotions painless. Agin and again i feel like half awake or in acoma where im not alone. She is my angel my god my vissions i see in my head and my dreams. She spins a web where we lay where she lays me down to rest.  Alone i stand in this life a wisper and a scream. This can be real im going to go insain blowing my mind away. What is left only dilusions of the girl i love. The pain come crashing in with the knife you stabed me twisting till the blood stains your blade. I stand in the rain gettting wet. The tears start to bleed crimison red like when you put crimson red lipstick you kiss me all over with. These games the dreams the vissions you left me with give me the strenght to keep walking threw hell i am traped threw. 3 am you are sitting on the couch you drinking red wine or have you finally trapped your next victim and ****** all his blood out of his vains to show you are my true love. Your love is so strong my night mars never seem to exist when you have me tighlt in your arms. Everyday i see buring firery hell i see people suffer for all there sins they have left scares all over. I will walk threw the vall of death just to be with my wife with her intoxicating aroma she suduces me with. Temtation will only bring me missery. My prince i love you i will catch all the threats in my web making sure your safe. No harm will come when you follow me threw the heavens and hells. She has bit me showing me a life with painless begainaings and endings. My life has been nothing but full of darkness pain and endless battles. My wife is like a black widdow her venom sinks in to my vains like needles setting all my pain go away she sets my fear and endless terros away. She promised me i will not die one breath at a time. She picked me up off the floor when i was to weak to keep going. Everyday my dreams change all i see is her right in front of me her venom gave be the visions of a millions dreams. The thunder storme breakes my silence when the fear is to much to bear. I drift in to my own grave awake or asleep. Feeling like im floating motionless in the ocean where the wakes ******* me down to a wattery grave. Before i get taken she grabes my wrist and pulles me to safty where i will not be dead. I feel like the rain sends my soul away dancing in the rain. Playing with fire is what i like to do she is my little widle fire i love to play with. Her long blond hair leaves me speechless. Everything seems to go crazy into my endless fight i face every day. Every battle i face she always stand by my side and fights all of the darkeast demons that torment me every night and day. Leaving my mind a damgerious thing to play with. My night mar becomes real when i start seeing the demons who have been chasing me threw this endless hell i shall rise to the heavens. I will cast my own shadow to play a psychotic game i like to do when your heart burst with all your emotions at once till your hollow inside.  In the middle of the night i sit up with fear and tears screaming my wifes name even tho she is right next to me. Its 4am nights i see with no sleep upp all night thinking all my thoughts. What is real what is true what is fake. Its time to embrace all the pain you feel and anger you go into. My soul is yours to take her fangs i feel it under my skin feeling like im being burned alive. Her love is all i need to to stay alive her love is what makes my life painless. But she suduces me then gives me her venom leaving me paralyzed into her love and powers of love lust and suductions its our own 50shades of grey with our love we have every day night .

With out her i will slowly drift into madness i will slowly go insain losing everything i hade slowly dying one breath at a time.
the power of lust suduction love will catch you like a spider in a web
Phila Mdleleni Apr 2015
Tomorrow when I have made it,
Tomorrow when I have reached my success destiny,
Tomorrow when my dreams and vissions come true,

I shall indeed say that I have passed and went through that phase,
For in that day it will feel like I have turned on a new page,

Tomorrow my pains and worries shall pass forever,
For in that day I shall roar louder like a Lion on a cage,

For I know that tomorrow it will feel like I'm on a new stage,
And it will truelly feel like a new age

For nostalgic sorrows will be felt no more..
I wrote this poem to motivate myself that I will overcome sorrows in my Life and live a happy life with no pain and anxiety.

— The End —