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Emory Jul 2018
This poem mentions self-harm. If this upsets you please don't read it


I used to want people to look at me,
And know that I was sick.
I envied those with physical illness,
As opposed to mental.

I romanticized their struggle,
And their experiences.
I felt hurt that I was treated,
As though it was all in my head.

That was until I engraved,
Markings upon my skin.
Now everyday I see,
The memory of,
A darkness I,
Nearly lost,
Myself,
In.
alexis hill Jun 4
today

I sat very still

the kind where you can almost hear the silence. I could feel my heart alive in my chest. beating.

walk on. walk on. walk on.

it wasn’t easy
I had to crawl to get here.

a lot of time spent tip toeing
through easily depressing situations

I don’t do well with emotional upsets
slit wrists
like please don’t hurt me
palms curled to a fist

but I couldn’t seem to
escape
his body weight

some things you just can’t
undo

unlike a knot tied
and pulled tightly
straight like a line
testing for sobriety

I AM NOT
linear

but you are

just like how you
think the past
shouldn’t
bother
me

and how recovery
should be me
getting over
it all

can you really call
yourself a professional
if you have never
walked the line?

so.

please- try mine.
life side.
km Mar 2017
:(
things have been different lately
and here i am hoping
for things to go back the way they were
all i've been doing is wait for you
and wonder what you're up to

i try to understand you
with your excuses and all
you say i'm over thinkning
but i think it's just too much

you were never like that
and things seem to be going downhill
sometimes i think this will pass
but i also think this wouldn't last

im tired of feeling lonely
even with your presence
conversations seem so dead
which upsets me the most

i dont know if this is still right
but i still love you wholeheartedly
our spark that once was there
is now slowly fading away
maybe i am overthinking, but who knows if i am right?
Skaidrum Feb 2017
...
new moon
"just let me sleep,"
moon eaten
my absence upsets all.
Look at me, really look at me,
stare up at the belly of a loved sky,
watch fingers dipping into bowls of blood holding hope,
feeling around for a sliver,
of sweet milk,
of relief,
of anything;

new moon whispers
on the dead bodies left behind,
god sighs---
he knows;

"I am not the same"

waxing crescent
map out my wreckage,
my skeleton of poetry;
in the spines of books loved by mankind,
bury me there in a pages of flowers---
in the altitude of words;
read me with a hunger you have never known before,
over and over;
whenever it seems fit~
like the light of the moon is a cigarette.

smoking,
he's always smoking now.
god takes another drag;
he describes to me:

"You could be my bible,
you book of blood"


I can't stand smoke...

"I have no business in being your  holy snakeskin."

first quarter
I've been searching for
solid ground, solid shadows,
a solid compromise;

I wanted a little more
than ordinary love from him so I

asked him where the static began,
for me it's below my bottom left rib
and found that it was also where the spiders started too.

Time, that quiet thing
obeys god, only
because it waits for no one

it loves
unzipping the law of alchemy,
cause ink flowered in my blood again;
I should thank time
it was this saving kind of grace;
always has been

god stroked my hair this time
and said quietly:

"You see,
the saddest thing is realizing
that there's nothing more they can do for you"


waxing gibbous
Oh, where's my love?
Is it in the fever I call happiness,
is it in the sword my mama raised me to be

Is it in the way
the moon tiptoes closer
when he says my name
in that beautiful way he does

or breaks my name
over his teeth like it's just
glass apples

God doesn't even look at me
he doesn't have to;

"Do you believe in angels?"

the wreckage answers him
"not lately"

full moon
And it begins again
I watch as he just looks away
and says it's fine
it hurts

god narrows his eyes but shrugs

"Pain had other plans for you."

I breathe out raggedly;

"I guess,
if there's no key
then I'll just swallow the whole door."

...
I trusted you.
I love you more than anything.
© Copywrite Skaidrum
Sally A Bayan Apr 28
(parts of an old poem-edited)

:::::::::::::::
Was awake, 'til Black Saturday's tail end,
through Easter Sunday's dawn...a day potent
with rejoicing, renewing faith, and the essence
.of one's presence
while seeking quietness
amidst the busyness
of one's existence
how does one forgive....forget
the wrong, when it still affects, and upsets?
how does one love tirelessly, without regret?
:::::::::::::
these thoughts come to me
when writing prose, or poetry.
when turning to shelley....or rossetti
the hours turn to a sentimental journey.
while understanding their lines,
i also ponder on my life...my own lines.
a mug of steaming creamed coffee, clears
the old English cloud, shooing away my fears,
......if it's my day.......if i'm in  luck,
a few lines arise easily.....or, i could get stuck.
:::::::::::::::
when winds aren't in my sail, they stubbornly
steer my boat towards that river lull, so droopy.
i paddle away, painstakingly,
when river runs dry, or dryer... i just let it be.
as long as coffee steams on......brewing,
my mug, i keep refilling...leaves me thinking
of  Elizabeth Barrett Browning's "sonnet 43..."
facing a mirror, i'd ask: "how do i love thee?"
i'd say back: "lemme count the ways, dearie."
::::::::::::::::
i see me, reeling on the bar of life's daily
circus, counting the ways, loving, going off key...
rather than fall, i turn those moments into poetry
keeping silent for hours....climbing dark valleys,
rising the next morning, to start my litany,
i ask myself anew: " how do i love thee? "
:::::::::::::::::::::::::::



Sally


©Rosalia Rosario A. Bayan
April 28, 2019
Ivy Leigh Aug 28
The need to breathe
and hold firm
in a room full of turds
over-weighs the hate
or the buzz in my mind.
Nevertheless I take that breath
and continue the journey
into my head
to find and lose
myself in others words.
I wont fall into rabbit holes
off of bar stools
that only lead to unhappy
upsets, shallow eyed
and deep tasting jacks
and cokes with drunken orders
of fries.
I can only imagine
the feeling of a piercing end
by bullet, knife, or choking line:
the sadness isn't as deep as alcohol runs
behind backs and under noses.
ATL Sep 16
remind me that i’m not a nag
and i’ll build you a boat made of
frilled marigolds & thornless roses,

i’ll float us along
and talk about how

it upsets me
when i see pieces of my father
mix into basic interactions.

my fear will leave
to go sit next to triangles in heaven

and i’ll wait for a scarecrow from high school that i loved but never slept with,
i’ll wait and think of your eyes.
Andrew Feb 2018
You ****** her in front of me
And there's nothing I can do
You ****** her like Ted Bundy
When there's nothing I can prove
By hitting her
You're pitting her
Against us
Defenseless
She acts superficial and vapid
To better fit into society
The change is quite rapid
Now she has propriety
But in accepting this role
Her broken soul grows cold
Her hand she folds
To be given gold
Becoming manipulative and callous
This upsets the peaceful balance
She cures herself of her pain affliction
By turning it into a destructive addiction
And getting on the other side of infliction
You should be the one that is faulted
Yet you're the one that is exalted
Can't you see how this woman is on the border?
She definitely sees how you defend Rob Porter
Drusila Mar 13
6:18

Getting up today felt like the vanilla scent of a cake.
Let the water run through your face
Neck,
The curve of your hip
In all your bare-skinned finery you're awake

Plain strong coffee
Let it be our ritual at daybreak
Perfect time for a sweet craving
Crimson lustful bliss
I say my "Laudes" through parted lips

7:22
Celeste's declamations sound more alluring today
Teach that Hedonism is not all Humans seek
Unique brazen secrecy
Let not life be an honest misery

14:03
In that aisle read "dairy replacement"
For a second wish to find out when did people supersede humanity
Proceed, smile to the woman at the counter
In the open-air, lit cigarettes
Blown smoke, blown regrets
The joy of yesterday not relive

16:30
Home sweet home
Lay down your upsets and close your eyes
The touch of your hands my worries confine
Shoulders,
Back,
Clavicle,
Shoulders,
Back
Lastly, we baked
Uncomplicated and unmixed orange cake
Orange cake and vanilla ice cream is our feast

21:47
The water takes away, clean, purges everything
Glory redemption finally found
Close your eyes and claim your prize
Caress me
I am brand new!
Laudes - are one of the liturgical hours celebrated in the morning. *Portuguese
Wait! Wait!
A pinch of salt in my heart,
Keeps inflaming through the halt.

Wait! Wait!
Some lost in their lives, living with you
Some lost their lives for the pain given by you.

Wait! Wait!
When people meet you,  
To the expectations they live up,
When people breathe you,
To the life they give up.

Wait! Wait!
To some you yield results,
To the most you offered upsets.

With perseverance, I get towards my aim,
As an interference, you send me back with a shame

People exclaim what God say
Why fear when I am here.
But Mr. Wait. You say
Nothing here, when I am near.

Through you, I faced disappointment.
With your end comes my accomplishment

Hello Mr. Wait. I warn you
The more you live with me,
The more I turn rebellious.
The more you give me woe,
The more I become your foe.

Thank you Mr. Wait.
You made me the best Hunter animal with a ferocious killer instinct,
I won't leave this instinct, till you become extinct.

Challenge for a change,
Revenge for an exchange.
I personified wait as a person. In career, what waiting does? This is is what I wrote. Waiting may be sweeter when it is more personal. But when one is rejected chances due to money, poverty or other reasons, a person is pushed to live with that waiting till the end of his life. Waiting has stolen many successes and even life. This is the central theme of the poem. But, beyond it, waiting offers a never defeating strength to attain an insurmountable task. It gives that Hunter and killer instinct to win with that aggressive spirit. That's what I told in the poem.
Dark n Beautiful Oct 2018
After last night’s rain the street
Smell like one of those booth peop holes on
42nd street:  Curiosities smear the cat:

This morning the sun is trying to make a
Break through: the pile of trash await
The landfill: just like the daily flushes
Of the unused pills:

We never give up. Our bodies are gradually dying,
but we ourselves are being made stronger each day
2 Corinthians 4:16:


Ten days to forget this cold: and dream of summer tides,
With a genuine smile, with gratification
I just want to forget this relentless extremely cold weather
not having to wait patiently for spring,
Which always leave me in apathetic state
  without my build in control: I am undone:
I struggle with my feelings, for my man’s servant
Open his eyes, LORD, so that he may see.

“Then the LORD opened the servant's eyes,
and he looked and saw …that I wasn’t really his Queen
but the ice  poet: his mere presence upsets me

*"In the depth of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer." — Albert Camus
PLAINJETPLANE Jan 11
Life isn’t always about the big things
but the little ones, they are not necessarily small either.

Like the times you would braid my hair before sleep
and the next morning I wished for it to grow faster
just to doze off in time before you finished
so that I would soundly sleep with no anxiety but a blankie.

Sometimes I felt like an elder sister
I’d go and scare the birds you wanna play with
I’d lock the door and make you plead outside
I’d make you take things I pretend I can’t reach
and I refused to stop, because I saw you laughed
and I guess, that’s probably a part of me which made you happy.

You said nothing’s impossible for me
and truth is, I kinda agree
I know I’d go as far as I could
I’d conquer the stage and make people believe
like a great person, there I stood.
But when the night passed
I’d put on the clothe that says my name
I’d take off the mask which has never been me
and I would find you.
I would find you
just to tell you how did my day go
like a little girl who’s just getting to know the world
and you’d nag at my irrational decision
and we both would be tired of how dumb I can be
but I know, I’d still go to sleep happy,
knowing that somebody’s just as dumb as me.

But little did we know
that bestfriend can break our hearts too
No, I’m not blaming you.
Because
I must have never been prepared
or I’ve been living in lies
that everything will work for me
even when I’m too busy to give a glance
I thought I’d never have to see you leave
I thought you’d never choose anything else before me
I thought what I did is enough to make you happy
when the truth is, it’s not always about what I feel
You too, want to live like me.

I miss you.
a lot.
as much as I was mad, it upsets me more that I can’t be there
to witness your happiness, like how you were there when I felt it
I still want to hear your dreams
I still want to call you stupid which only means I just want the best for you
I still wanna fight the person who makes you sad
I still want to be the gangster whom bigger figure you know you’d always have to hide behind it.

But I just can’t move.
or am I just waiting.

That one day, you’d call my name and hug me
cuz by that time, I know you still need me
I’ll know I’m not only a person asking for a sympathy
that I’m also able to give love rather than just receive
and that, you still haven’t replaced me
with a new idea of an opposite character I’ve turned out to be.

But maybe, we're just a same person
from two different worlds
We thought we could walk the journey
with all we got and any obstacles, we're ready
But nobody has ever guaranteed this
cuz it's always best to let go, and let God
and as for me
All I want is for you to be happy
Even if it means, happier without me.
So close yet so far.
Deep down inside, you still have a special spot in my heart. You're still my bestfriend. I don't know how is it going over there but as for me, I know that I'll always love you.
sage eugene zumr Nov 2018
never knowin what service was the best  
always tearing at my chest
demons never resting from this quest
it upsets me to be tested by the devil
and his army of complexion
its definite id rather death
then to be seen as someone
who cant stretch out a hand
and contest like this man lets
god and his ****** pests
always want fraud from a lambs vest
famous rappers got fan checks
makin me look upset and i cant rest
so i build the feat with concealed release
talkin matrix never made it in them seas
im always kickin with the bassist
and he breaks it like a beast
tension in the room
it always seems
You can tell by a pale shadow of former self
And  shape of the scattered pieces
You can tell ,
From the pieces of the once bread basket of Africa
That someone is slowly
And artistically looting the store 

I can see,
The trailing blood and the aura of warmth
That there was once,
Electrical pulse of the heart
As povo cry,
For broad-based  
and inclusive Dialogue to rescue,
Yes!
I could hear,increasing  calls  for  precipice
And wails to  avert further  implosion
  
And the winds of memory floating by
The crescendo in the calls for sound talks
Yes sound dialogue,
In the wake of an  increasingly restless citizenry struggles

Still dustbin  of a golden history
You can sense from the tremble of the chambers
The undying pulse and the scent of a beloved
That the heart once danced to a dreamers' beats

To them tears are,
The horse pipes they use to water their worth
To multitudes,tears are words the heart can’t express
As the black cloud  sheds  rays  of hope  
Still leaves “imminent light” behind

As the mass bank hope
In our eternal message of hope
Ushered by Martin Luther King, Jr.
  "One day  dawn will come".

I can see  traceable  traces
Of corrupt foot prints
And  traceable track record
Of 'prominent' looting finger prints

As the influential turn aside the needy from justice,
Rob the poor Chimanimani people of their right,
Making widows  their spoil,
And *****-nilly  making the fatherless their prey!

Dear LORD!
Why  your wrath  upsets not these moral monsters?
Who are by no means worthy of following
Those that deprive the afflicted
Those who because of their  hard and impenitent hearts
Attract your necessary reaction to objective moral ill

Dear Lord why has your  wrath not fallen
On rightful  time?
How can hell be just?
I
Shyanna Aubin Aug 2018
There was a time were there was a girl who wanted things but couldn't explain why. She was confused and depressed all the time and her body kept changing. Her parents never excepted who she has decided to become, so when she grew up it was hard to tell others who she now is. I am that girl. I wanted everything.
As I continue to grow up I learn new things. I have gone through so many different changes that sometimes I get very confused. I have been in many different relationships and most have not been healthy. There were a few different relationships that were good but I messed up by leaving. But there is only one person I can actually say I would get back with. He was the first person I can actually say was the first ZI ever loved and I know if he ever asked me back out I would leave the person I was with for him.
I'm in a program because apparently im too much to handle for my parents. Sometimes I feel neglected but i know i'm not. There are alot of people that are there for me even if it's not my parents. I am a very bubbly person. It hurts me ever more than a normal person will hurt when I get upset because depression makes everything worse than a normal person might feel. I say might because who really know what or how others feel. Somedays I wish I wasn't alive but then I think there would be no way anyone can see the world without them in it because what if the world didn't exist.
My relationships are always complicated because I get bored because I ****** up the onr relationship with someone that wasn't that bad. I listen to what other people were telling me instead of following what my heart wants. I think to myself what if I didn't break up with that person. Would my life be different if he was in it but as my boyfriend. Would I stay home with my mom and got my **** together sooner than I did. I just wonder if he still thought of me. I know he was a big part of my life when i was with him. I miss it. I miss being able to hug and hold him. I miss him in general.
But who cares about me anymore, not many. I'm usually on my own looking far into my future trying to piece the past together. Removing small parts of my past I want to forget but can't because I have been through so much there isn't much I can just forget. My past formed me into the person I am today and for that I can't forget my past. I like who I am today even if others don't. At Least I can see how much I have changed and made myself into a better person.
When I think of my past, i think off everything I have suffered and it hurts. But I have to do things the way I do or ill panic. Im very weird I bite. When some asks to fight me I growl at them and show my teeth. I'm not normal. Im literally like an animal. I do weird things. But I also am a very creative person when it comes to things. I have a good heart. Even tho I might do some strange crap here and there. I have done bad things but made up for them in the end.
I know i'm not the best but I do try my hardest. I just struggle knowing I have been in and out of programs since I was twelve. It's hard mainly growing up in places away from your family and that's where the depression and the bad behavior started. I have recognized that I started to act up and get all depressed when my dad and mom split up. I have struggled accepting the fact that they “will never ever ever get back together” yes I just quoted the taylor swift song lyrics. It upsets me but hey its life and you can't change the past but you can move toward the future.
When my parents split up my mom got with this guy that I hated with all my heart. And yes hate is a strong word but I hated him. He tried to replace my father and I didnt like that very much. My dad meant everything to me when I was younger and he still does to this day. After I started getting close to moms new boyfriend he did the unexpected. He went to take me out for ice cream down the street when it was dark out.
There was this shortcut in the woods and when we were halfway down the hill in the woods he pushed me down took off my pants and started touching me in places I didn't want touched. I started crying but he didnt stop. Then he put his head between my legs and started to eat me out and I was only 9 years old I didn't want that. I just was scared and I was too small to push him off. When I got home I was to scared to tell my because he told me not to and if you didn't listen to what you were told you'd get punished and after what he already did I was scared of what he would do again. Every day for a week he would go in my room late at night and touch me. But I was glad it was me and not my little sister so I put up with it.
Not long after he started to hit me and my little brother. One day he kicked my little brother in the back and slammed his head on the floor that was the day I took a chance grabbed a broom and whipped my moms boyfriend in the head. But it was just enough for my brother to get away but I was the next target. But that's not all that's just thes start. He put bruises all over my body but at least he stopped sexually touching me. That's all I cared about was keeping my siblings safe.
But even through those times my mom didn't do anything she let him hit us but she was scared too. One day he even pulled my little sister through a window because she punched my little brother I was so scared I ran upstairs to my neighbors house and told them and my neighbors boyfriend came to the rescue. A few months after he knelt on my chest I couldn't breathe but that was the one time my mom told him to get the ******* me. But once he got off me i ran outside in shorts and a tanktop and I ran to school with just socks on my feet and it was the middle of winter. That was the day my school called my dad and said that if he didnt come pick me up then with my siblings we were going to get taken away so my dad came and got us.
Few months after my 11th birthday my dad had a friend watch me when I was home sick. Everyone trusted him but then he molested me. I was sick but I took my blanket and ran to the bathroom and locked the door and waited for my dad to come home and I told my dad what happened and my dad freaked out. But christmas eve I told my mom and after that my mom took me home with her new boyfriend and never let me back to dads after that but I snook to see my dad after that because I didn't want to live with mom at all I didn't trust it after he last boyfriend. But can you blame me.
Grace May 6
"It would hurt me", he whispered softly under the protective blanket of the night.

He held her closer in his arms, "You are my everything."

He paused. "It upsets me to see you unhappy. I want nothing more than your happiness..."

Another pause.

"So I understand if you left. If you left me, if you left this world."

He struggled to find the right words.

"I'd understand but it would still hurt."
rhiannon Feb 27
Heart Broken!
Holly’s Story:

Snow swirled around the misty,dark forest as i walked through carefully.Dead leaves crunched and the wind blew heavily.Trees swayed from side to side,shaking colourful leaves onto the ground.Red,orange and green.The colours of the beautiful Autumn.I was alone,listening to the birds sing their sad,melancholy tunes as they flew past.Cold air blew against my back.I shuddered.And turned to the icy footpath.I skipped along merrily,chasing the little birds as i went.The dark approached and i found it harder to see where i was but i still happily played with the squirrels and robins as i walked home.

It was now pitch black outside and i completely lost where i was.I continued nervously.My heart beating fast.As i was walking i could hear footsteps moving towards me.I stopped and listened.The footsteps seemed to be getting closer to me and approaching more quickly.I turned around but couldn’t see anything.Then i tripped.I stood back up.As i was about to run something grabbed my arm and pulled me.Who was it?Where is it taking me?I scream.

I tried to wriggle however the hands gripped more tightly and and stayed firmly against my small,cold arms.A couple of minutes later,i stopped wriggling as i started to feel extremely tired and soon i fell asleep,breathing in the cold air.

The beautiful sun awoke me and i stood up,brushing the Autumn leaves off my ripped,muddy jeans.I walked through the hanging branches and shadowed trees.Something was moving in the distance.I concentrated hard and saw a dark figure moving towards me confidently.As it approached i could make out a face.It’s eyes as blue as the ocean and features pale.It stared at me with an expression of hatred and loathing.It was wearing dark clothes and was extremely thin.

It moved from behind the shadowed trees and i started to recognize it.My ex-boyfriend.He looked sad but he glared at me with hatred.It seemed like he wanted some sort of revenge on me but it was hard to tell as he also looked sad.As if he wanted to tell me something but just couldn’t bring it into words.

It all started last summer.It was the hottest day of the year.The sun beamed its hot rays and smiled cheerfully at the playful children.I walked through the grounds of the house to the lake.There stood Alex.I placed the flowers on the fountain side and picked up the vase.”Here,i’ll help you,”Alex said as he tried to grab hold of the vase.”No,no,i can do it.”i replied.He continued to pull,insisting that he should help and…The vase smashed into tiny pieces.I cried,”Now look what you have done!”I leapt into the lake to fetch the pieces.Soaked i climbed out and walked back to the house.I turned around,he was still there and looked shocked as if he didn’t know how to react.To some people it may have seemed silly but it was a really valuable vase of my granddad's and the only thing i had to keep as memories of him.And it is now unrepairable.

It was mid-afternoon and our servant,Becky was cooking a roast dinner for my older brother,Max,who was returning
home from Cambridge University.No one was in the mood for a hot meal when it was already extremely hot.Alex sat next to me at dinner.It was awkward as no one knew what to say.I was still really upset with him.

He phoned me and messaged me after that saying that if i let him help it wouldn’t break.I started to ignore him for weeks and he said,”we can’t stay together if we are not even talking,it wouldn’t be right,i’m sorry!”

I know i should just forgive him but it upsets me too much.He walked further out of the forest and stared at the sky.It feels like he might be trying to bring back the happy memories we had together before we split up.I still think about it sometimes and feel sorry for him that he is so heart-broken.I just can’t quite explain it to him.

Alex’s Story:

Watching the distance between us both when we used to be so close just breaks my heart.I think back to all the memories we had together and happy things we done and just wish it could still be like that now.If only Holly understood how much it means to me.I sit on the snowy bank and the dead Autumn leaves and write in my spotty note book.

“It’s hard to believe

That you no longer

Care about my feelings,

Knowing that we

Were once so

Close to each

Other.

Why can’t the

Bond we had

Still be there?

Sitting in the

Darkness,

Remembering the

Happy times we

Once shared,

I hate the

Distance that

There is

Now between

Us.

Why don’t you

Understand?

Why don’t you

Care.”

I then put my notebook in my pocket and alone i stay in the cold,dark forest.Maybe one day Holly will understand.

A few years later!

I still go past Holly’s house sometimes to remind myself of all the happy memories that we shared.I never see her anymore though now that i am a famous Poet and Author.We never got back together even though i really wish we did.I love visiting the area Holly lived with the beautiful flowers and colourful leaves surrounding the forest and all the cute,little animals that sing their sad songs of Autumn.It’s peaceful! But sad! The magic that Holly brought to it is no longer there and i’m always there alone now so it isn’t as special as the times i spent with Holly.The wildlife no longer moves cheerfully in the wind and the leaves don’t have their sparkle that they used to have.Even the snow doesn’t swirl around the dark sky anymore.Everything has changed.

There is only one thing that keeps me going and that keeps me going and that is my books i write.Without them i would be trapped inside my own thoughts and sad memories.
A sad heart breaking story!Bound to bring you to tears.
Eva Rushton Aug 2018
As I sit under the tree , it’s leaves canapy above
As if a spy blue sky peeks through the gaps
The song of breeze takes me away to places I love
In distance I hear ,maybe birds I think perhaps

The old dog lays at my side, snaping at Flies
I try read his mind, and he blinks as if to hide
Then with a moan he shuts his eyes
And into dreams he’s gone with pride

Below the hill I hear the stream trickle past
And I imagine all of life’s upsets
On a line and out I cast
Away they go, no more to feel or to fret

Written by E. M. Rushton
Aug 16th 2018
Eleni Sep 18
Search for me in your deepest woes
Do not be gentle with your shows.

For it is not easy to find a locket in the mist
And harder for the trapeze to twist-

and break with truth.
Naivety pirouettes beyond youth.

Circus nature preys and submits in hurdles
Upsets the fragile body with tight girdles.

Blisters shall form lest you be still
But comfort never satisfies the thrill.
Jonna 8h
I don’t know where
I’d be without you now,
but I know I wouldn’t
be the same somehow.

I haven’t always done
my best by you,
but you stuck by me
through and through.

Your love, loyalty, and strength
always cease to amaze me.
How do I tell you thank you
adequately?

The day came where I watched
you start slipping away,
and I started to think about
what I’d say.

Words and memories
you started to lose.
I saw it on your face;
shattered, bemused.

And all I want is to give you
your years back.
I see you helpless,
starting to crack.

It breaks my heart
and it scares me too,
to watch this, what
you’re going through.

It upsets my stomach
thinking about this.
Life’s recent events
have my mind abyss.

You’ve left an imprint
on my heart,
no matter what happens
we’ll never be apart.

It’s tough for me,
I know it is for you.
I’m gonna do my best
to be whatever you need me to.

— The End —