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"terrors" poems
Why Men Cry in the Bathroom For so many reasons. I will tell you the why. I think you know, Or perhaps, you think you know. Men are always O.K., Even when not. We expect the worse, Accept the worse, Nonetheless, We are forever unprepared. Wearily, we cry, In the bathroom, in private, Lest sighs slip by, We be unmasked, Early warring, strife signs warning. Copious, tho we weep Before the mirror confessor, It is relief untethered, Unbinding of the feet, An uncounting Of beaded rosaries, Of freshly fallen hail stones, Of night times terrors By dawn's early edition's light, and welcomed. But look for the mute tear, The eye-cornered drop, *** tat, that never drops, But never ceases formation and Reforming, over and over again, In a state of perpetuity of reconstitution, *The tippy tear of an iceberg revealing, And I see you peeping, wondering, What is beneath* Look for: the torn worm-eaten edges of spirit, thrift shop bought, extra worn, grieving lines neath the eyes, where the salt has evaporated, discolored the skin. worry lines, under and above, browed mapped, furrowed boundaries. the laugh line saga, where better days are stored, recalled, as well as recanted, publicly, privately. Why just men? I don't know, Perhaps, it is all I know. end.<nml> Jan 6, 2013
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Jun 22, 2013
Jun 22, 2013 at 10:46 AM UTC
Do You Know Why Men Cry in the Bathroom? (2013, can u believe it)
My name is Erin and i was ***** at the age of 7 it has taken me 14 years of my life for those 13 words to escape my hollow mouth the only questions i come to now is why why lock me in that room why take everything from me my innocence my purity my childhood in that room where my family trusted you where i trusted you the night terrors i have to this day still haunt my mind like a never ending drive in movie that plays over and over only the moon in the night sky isnt made to be found here there is no light in these terrors i cant sleep this time of year because every time i do its you in that room locking the door shutting the windows ********** me yelling at me every single night i close my eyes it has taken me 14 years to accept the fact that i was taken by you i have been numb ever since left in the dust rotting away at the core thinking i was nothing thinking i deserved nothing because you took everything but not anymore i will recover from this i am strong enough i believe in myself i believe in my own happiness and i promsie that when i have children one day i will never ever let them rot at the core i will find happiness the darkness will not take over this time
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Feb 27, 2018
Feb 27, 2018 at 3:17 AM UTC
The Anniversary of What Started Everything
The man of life upright, whose guiltless heart is free From all dishonest deeds and thoughts of vanity: The man whose silent days in harmless joys are spent, Whom hopes cannot delude, nor fortune discontent; That man needs neither towers nor armor for defense, Nor secret vaults to fly from thunder's violence: He only can behold with unaffrighted eyes The horrors of the deep and terrors of the skies; Thus scorning all the care that fate or fortune brings, He makes the heaven his book, his wisdom heavenly things; Good thoughts his only friends, his wealth a well-spent age, The earth his sober inn and quiet pilgrimage.
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13.7k
Guiltless Heart
Poppy, oh poppy abundant and flowing across all the fields you're still constantly growing. As your seeds blow and find their own bed, they're reminding us of the most glorious dead. Glorious in the contribution they made. Glorious for the price that they paid. Glorious for fighting for what they believed. Glorious for the terrors and hell they received. Standing their ground in the eye of the storm. Standing their ground whilst receiving the swarm. Standing their ground in the mud and the vile Standing their ground through the horrors and toil. The death and the blood flowing like a river. Like the fields of the poppies the breeze does now shiver. The seeds carry on into a new time, an horizon of red the future will entwine. Poppy, oh poppy so winding and red, reminding most deftly of our glorious dead. You are constantly sowing your own little seed as those who had fought did for those who were freed. Although many thousands of lives they have gone your legacy will  like that small seed go on. Although now in history and most never met you can take it for granted we shall never forget.
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Nov 11, 2014
Nov 11, 2014 at 2:31 PM UTC
Poppy, Oh Poppy!
pageants of pageants fractals and hype of faceless terrors and faceless inside when rain on corrugated iron when rain and the kettle boiling i know i have taken too much time i have taken time from time to decide to realise i was only wiser before trying. Patterns of paradox haunt the terms of all desire tussock grass on paths that cuts the thin skin and sticks and a view to nowhere some leaf in autumn the hope of finding
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Feb 12, 2017
Feb 12, 2017 at 4:50 AM UTC
4am when the moonlight broke through
Education is currently being used as a weapon to arm the educated to defend the system. Question the system. Go out there and equip yourself for the right belief. Be a dreamer. The dream is beautiful. The problem with dreams is that you don’t know the dream has turned into a nightmare until you wake up. Are you awake? Be awake. The problem with being awake; we need to rest. Lucidly dream. Be lucid. The problem with being lucid; you’re lucid. There was a dream not long ago. The dream was beautiful. We liked the dream, the dream became ours and we slept. Slowly we all grew tired. Those that did not need to sleep, those that did not like our dream, we treated like children. We know that we need to rest and we were tired. We left our children to starve. We forced others to sleep and so, we forced our children to sleep. Even in our sleep, we forced others to sleep. And so the big dream grew. It became nightmare. We all dream. Be aware of others dreams. Be aware of others while we sleep. Be aware of those that sleep while we awaken. When you wake and see your siblings rest no longer. That their dream, once ours, has turned to terror. The problem with dreams… We force our children to sleep. Is this bad? Always question. Should we force them to wake? Force can create. Force can destroy. The problem with being awake, when we know our brothers and sisters sweat in there nightmares; we have a choice. That is not a choice to wake them or not. To hope for the best. That the nightmare will end and the dream will return. A dream that has travelled through the terrors of our minds will not return the same. Would you like the red pill or the blue pill? Is there good and bad? Force can create and destroy. Be mindful of how you wake. Be lucid of how you force others to wake. Tea or coffee; a cigarette; some breakfast; some fear? Use balance. We are all unique. I have a personal story. As I wrote this, typos occurred in the original edit. The technology, ‘swipe’ was used.  I meant to spell unique and unite was spelt. Personal became powerful and with turned to WE. Is there a reason ‘i’ should always be capitalized? ‘i’ wish to be mindful of my readers. ‘i’ want to stay true to them. We that can read are the readers. ‘i’ am the reader. When I isn’t capitalized I began to feel more comfortable with using it, if i gave it arms; ‘i’. And when I typed to explain that, I went to preferring if isn’t typing out ‘and then i and then ‘, to just type two of them; ii. We don’t want to be alone. There’s no I in teamwork but there is and I in kind. I is complicated. Be you. Find your voice. Have a voice and be aware. Others have a voice. What would happen if we all respected each other’s voice? What would happen if we all had the same voice? That was the beauty of the dream. The dream is travelling through nightmare and is slowly returning. It has changed. Unite our uniqueness’s. Do you eat fast food? I love it. It is a dream… Do I eat it all the time, I hope not. Ken Robinson is a good man to ask. Consider food for the mind. There are beliefs out there. There’s a belief out there that our world is ****** Forgive the language. Understand it. I wanted to say, ‘that our world is doomed; eternally ****** to be destroyed’ and that scared me. **** There will always be nightmares, disaster and destruction. What is an ‘aster’? Curious. When did we chose to destroy; each other? Could we create; each other? There’s a belief out there for that one too. Are you awake, yet?
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Sep 22, 2012
Sep 22, 2012 at 9:06 AM UTC
.What is an Aster?
Education is currently being used as a weapon to arm the educated to defend the system. Question the system. Go out there and equip yourself for the right belief. Be a dreamer. The dream is beautiful. The problem with dreams is that you don’t know the dream has turned into a nightmare until you wake up. Are you awake? Be awake. The problem with being awake; we need to rest. Lucidly dream. Be lucid. The problem with being lucid; you’re lucid. There was a dream not long ago. The dream was beautiful. We liked the dream, the dream became ours and we slept. Slowly we all grew tired. Those that did not need to sleep, those that did not like our dream, we treated like children. We know that we need to rest and we were tired. We left our children to starve. We forced others to sleep and so, we forced our children to sleep. Even in our sleep, we forced others to sleep. And so the big dream grew. It became nightmare. We all dream. Be aware of others dreams. Be aware of others while we sleep. Be aware of those that sleep while we awaken. When you wake and see your siblings rest no longer. That their dream, once ours, has turned to terror. The problem with dreams… We force our children to sleep. Is this bad? Always question. Should we force them to wake? Force can create. Force can destroy. The problem with being awake, when we know our brothers and sisters sweat in there nightmares; we have a choice. That is not a choice to wake them or not. To hope for the best. That the nightmare will end and the dream will return. A dream that has travelled through the terrors of our minds will not return the same. Would you like the red pill or the blue pill? Is there good and bad? Force can create and destroy. Be mindful of how you wake. Be lucid of how you force others to wake. Tea or coffee; a cigarette; some breakfast; some fear? Use balance. We are all unique. I have a personal story. As I wrote this, typos occurred in the original edit. The technology, ‘swipe’ was used.  I meant to spell unique and unite was spelt. Personal became powerful and with turned to WE. Is there a reason ‘i’ should always be capitalized? ‘i’ wish to be mindful of my readers. ‘i’ want to stay true to them. We that can read are the readers. ‘i’ am the reader. When I isn’t capitalized I began to feel more comfortable with using it, if i gave it arms; ‘i’. And when I typed to explain that, I went to preferring if isn’t typing out ‘and then i and then ‘, to just type two of them; ii. We don’t want to be alone. There’s no I in teamwork but there is and I in kind. I is complicated. Be you. Find your voice. Have a voice and be aware. Others have a voice. What would happen if we all respected each other’s voice? What would happen if we all had the same voice? That was the beauty of the dream. The dream is travelling through nightmare and is slowly returning. It has changed. Unite our uniqueness’s. Do you eat fast food? I love it. It is a dream… Do I eat it all the time, I hope not. Ken Robinson is a good man to ask. Consider food for the mind. There are beliefs out there. There’s a belief out there that our world is ****** Forgive the language. Understand it. I wanted to say, ‘that our world is doomed; eternally ****** to be destroyed’ and that scared me. **** There will always be nightmares, disaster and destruction. What is an ‘aster’? Curious. When did we chose to destroy; each other? Could we create; each other? There’s a belief out there for that one too. Are you awake, yet?
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A decade of silent and grieving pours Sadly no mountains to explore Only islands in our dreams That are vastly full of dreary streams, Wailing rains have stopped, But only can I hear the sound of my clap, This one pour of flood, has caused many terrors and blood             - Learn your mistakes before it may cause a storm-
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Sep 28, 2014
Sep 28, 2014 at 10:20 PM UTC
One Pour Of Flood
What Hope Remained? What hope remained when hope for hope was spent?         When putrid plumes dulled morning into night         Hope lived in heart-struck deeds of bold intent,         As mortals wept and earthborn angels went         With downcast eyes to clamber heavens height. What hope remained when hope for hope was spent?         When panicked sirens wailed a lost lament         And backs were bowed beneath ungodly weight,         Hope lived in heart-struck deeds of bold intent         As boots bore souls up treadmills burnt and bent         To scale a void devoid of dawning light. What hope remained when hope for hope was spent?         For those in sight of angels heaven sent         Atop the world to aid their mortal plight,         Hope lived in heart-struck deeds of bold intent.         When wingless brethren conquered feared ascent         To gift last hope to all who saw their might:                 What hope remained when hope for hope was spent?                 Hope lived in heart-struck deeds of bold intent. In The Fall I chanced upon a stranger in the fall, Cosmetic garb of office black and white Portraying calm demeanor of his plight As shadows panicked on a stricken wall, And oft' I find my mind in numb recall To look upon that helpless human kite Who tumbled from the terrors of a height, Yet graceful as an eagle in a stall Before it plummets earthward --   'Neath the pall Of twisted steel rended by follied flight, That stranger lives forever in the light Suspended in iconic timeless sprawl.         I wonder, in the briefness of his fall,         Did he derive the meaning of it all?
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Sep 4, 2015
Sep 4, 2015 at 7:20 PM UTC
Villanelle and Sonnet
What Hope Remained? What hope remained when hope for hope was spent?         When putrid plumes dulled morning into night         Hope lived in heart-struck deeds of bold intent,         As mortals wept and earthborn angels went         With downcast eyes to clamber heavens height. What hope remained when hope for hope was spent?         When panicked sirens wailed a lost lament         And backs were bowed beneath ungodly weight,         Hope lived in heart-struck deeds of bold intent         As boots bore souls up treadmills burnt and bent         To scale a void devoid of dawning light. What hope remained when hope for hope was spent?         For those in sight of angels heaven sent         Atop the world to aid their mortal plight,         Hope lived in heart-struck deeds of bold intent.         When wingless brethren conquered feared ascent         To gift last hope to all who saw their might:                 What hope remained when hope for hope was spent?                 Hope lived in heart-struck deeds of bold intent. In The Fall I chanced upon a stranger in the fall, Cosmetic garb of office black and white Portraying calm demeanor of his plight As shadows panicked on a stricken wall, And oft' I find my mind in numb recall To look upon that helpless human kite Who tumbled from the terrors of a height, Yet graceful as an eagle in a stall Before it plummets earthward --   'Neath the pall Of twisted steel rended by follied flight, That stranger lives forever in the light Suspended in iconic timeless sprawl.         I wonder, in the briefness of his fall,         Did he derive the meaning of it all?
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35
I am not just a person in a uniform, I am a Soldier. Every time I arise,  I obey; Each time she calls, I step up To defend her freedom, To restore her home of peace I arise,  I obey, I soldier on. Into the forest of her terrors I charge, not without fear for that which is mine but with love and strength and faith, I March. Defending the labour of heroes past, I march; fighting for dreams of her children bright- the  future she deserves. I arise, I obey, I soldier on. In the army I serve Nigeria,  my Country with heart, might and spine. Though a thousand times I have fallen, bits and pieces of me, lost to her darkness, still I obey, knowing it may be my last. I arise, leaving my family and friends behind. I obey your call of duty. My service and loyalty I pack on with my combat gear, that you may live to see yet another day, to feel yet another ray of light on your face. I am not just a person in a uniform. I am your Soldier,  the Nigerian Soldier, Ambushed and slaughtered in 40s, 70s and 100 for lack of resources. Bless me O Nigeria as I arise and obey Send me to your enemies with arsenals and might to match the fire in my eyes. As opposed to the massacres of me, let the headlines read of our gallant victory For my victory is yours over those who threaten our unity. I am not just a person in a uniform. I am your Soldier Do not let my bravery dissipate to stupidity For I rise,  I obey,  I soldier on still. ©Belema .S.  Ekine ©belemascribbles
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Dec 23, 2018
Dec 23, 2018 at 6:51 PM UTC
SOLDIERING ON
I am not just a person in a uniform, I am a Soldier. Every time I arise,  I obey; Each time she calls, I step up To defend her freedom, To restore her home of peace I arise,  I obey, I soldier on. Into the forest of her terrors I charge, not without fear for that which is mine but with love and strength and faith, I March. Defending the labour of heroes past, I march; fighting for dreams of her children bright- the  future she deserves. I arise, I obey, I soldier on. In the army I serve Nigeria,  my Country with heart, might and spine. Though a thousand times I have fallen, bits and pieces of me, lost to her darkness, still I obey, knowing it may be my last. I arise, leaving my family and friends behind. I obey your call of duty. My service and loyalty I pack on with my combat gear, that you may live to see yet another day, to feel yet another ray of light on your face. I am not just a person in a uniform. I am your Soldier,  the Nigerian Soldier, Ambushed and slaughtered in 40s, 70s and 100 for lack of resources. Bless me O Nigeria as I arise and obey Send me to your enemies with arsenals and might to match the fire in my eyes. As opposed to the massacres of me, let the headlines read of our gallant victory For my victory is yours over those who threaten our unity. I am not just a person in a uniform. I am your Soldier Do not let my bravery dissipate to stupidity For I rise,  I obey,  I soldier on still. ©Belema .S.  Ekine ©belemascribbles
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42
Tyger Tyger. burning bright, In the forests of the night; What immortal hand or eye. Could frame thy fearful symmetry? In what distant deeps or skies. Burnt the fire of thine eyes? On what wings dare he aspire? What the hand, dare seize the fire? And what shoulder, & what art, Could twist the sinews of thy heart? And when thy heart began to beat. What dread hand? & what dread feet? What the hammer? what the chain, In what furnace was thy brain? What the anvil? what dread grasp. Dare its deadly terrors clasp? When the stars threw down their spears And watered heaven with their tears: Did he smile His work to see? Did he who made the lamb make thee? Tyger Tyger burning bright, In the forests of the night: What immortal hand or eye, Dare frame thy fearful symmetry?
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7.6k
The Tyger
'Twas my spring of youth in that lot That now haunts my mind by that spot Of which I could not love less - Wonderful loneliness, Of the lake's Serenity gown, With nature circled 'round. But when Death hath reached its grasp Upon Serenity's water - poured into his flask, The sadistic sagacious wind went by Murmuring the funeral cry - Then - I finally awake - To the terrors of Serenity Lake. Yet I persist that it was not fright! Simply Death's delight - Fueled by the Void of Sorrow, Pierced by Serenity's arrow - No! - This Love I must define! The trip to the lake, of thee and thine. O! - Death's grasp laid in that voracious wave, Enticing Serenity to be my eternal grave, Upon that very fatal spot - Where the two children rot. For no soul shall ever make, A Heaven out of Serenity Lake.
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Dec 2, 2015
Dec 2, 2015 at 8:48 PM UTC
Serenity Lake
Why am I so weak? Why can’t I be strong for once. Why can’t I be normal? Why do I live in a world of pain This reality of truth This realm of heartbreak? Why do I live in a society where I fear for my life? I fear the terrorists coming, I fear the school shooters shooting, I fear the threats that have yet to be known. Why should I, or anyone Have to grow up with this? The constant threat of something coming, The feeling of uncertainty when it come to school, Wondering if I’ll be the next victim? When will I be able to walk the streets, Not wondering if I will get shot. What wrong with today? People ask. Let me tell you. I have to grow up Living In fear for my life I have to grow up with the threats of terrorism I have to grow up Wondering if I’ll die today I have to grow up Knowing the world is falling apart I have to grow up Feeling as if there is always something bigger than me I have to grow up With no hope for a better world This world is toxic, I wonder when others will start noticing
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Apr 10, 2018
Apr 10, 2018 at 5:57 PM UTC
The World Terrors
i write to hide away from the terrors of the world. i write to sink slowly into the terrors of my mind.
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Apr 26, 2014
Apr 26, 2014 at 3:24 PM UTC
terror
Like a captive, I capture rapture wrapping around stakes that matter Joan of Arc battered Also tattered but, easily dismissive Refracted from fractured prominent phrases people play with Distinctly persuasive and evasive, dressed boyishly attractive, lax stature, dawning armor crafted by absence as if asked about it- I’m drifted Protection is principle prerequisite, when fire is lit I sort of implore your aorta before it’s incinerated to ashes Dethatched as a habit, with swords or hatchets crafted to singe heartstrings that attached it While I slash slick Rick as a quick fix, To fend for pretend pretenses or presumed tricks, I can’t quit Cause I hit lips against hash spliffs fashioned with dashes of passion all while rationing fireball cinnamon sips Martyr to avoidance I gaze at fabled dazed gossipers galvanizing grips on gritty grapevines while licking warning labels through smoke haze on blurred lines Capably unstable Other eyes attending scandal circles able to shout lies and rekindle handed arguments on tables with locked smiles stay boxed in Avidly amiable Searching for counterparts when combusted or branded Toying with matches loses meaning when rules reseed Those vagabonds claim love is some all end hard bent to mend what the same above can’t comprehend. Breaking boredom, I pillage pillows with night terrors And ardent arsonists yearn for flames that churn, turn, liquefy and learn learned thoughts and smoldered feelings Completely complacent Melting in one another they are completing each other like two candles tryst true at a wedding day However later the blaze is severed, smoke sears, and charred black wick stands alone for them. Aggressive and progressive. As for me never pleading, fire forever fleets to streets between iron bars I built that cage in deep heat and seep dire dreams once desired Suppose I’m a skeptic Roasted or disconnected Just jaded, just met you Always over it too soon Burnt but I’m amused. I’m useful.
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Jun 9, 2014
Jun 9, 2014 at 11:59 PM UTC
Martyr
Like a captive, I capture rapture wrapping around stakes that matter Joan of Arc battered Also tattered but, easily dismissive Refracted from fractured prominent phrases people play with Distinctly persuasive and evasive, dressed boyishly attractive, lax stature, dawning armor crafted by absence as if asked about it- I’m drifted Protection is principle prerequisite, when fire is lit I sort of implore your aorta before it’s incinerated to ashes Dethatched as a habit, with swords or hatchets crafted to singe heartstrings that attached it While I slash slick Rick as a quick fix, To fend for pretend pretenses or presumed tricks, I can’t quit Cause I hit lips against hash spliffs fashioned with dashes of passion all while rationing fireball cinnamon sips Martyr to avoidance I gaze at fabled dazed gossipers galvanizing grips on gritty grapevines while licking warning labels through smoke haze on blurred lines Capably unstable Other eyes attending scandal circles able to shout lies and rekindle handed arguments on tables with locked smiles stay boxed in Avidly amiable Searching for counterparts when combusted or branded Toying with matches loses meaning when rules reseed Those vagabonds claim love is some all end hard bent to mend what the same above can’t comprehend. Breaking boredom, I pillage pillows with night terrors And ardent arsonists yearn for flames that churn, turn, liquefy and learn learned thoughts and smoldered feelings Completely complacent Melting in one another they are completing each other like two candles tryst true at a wedding day However later the blaze is severed, smoke sears, and charred black wick stands alone for them. Aggressive and progressive. As for me never pleading, fire forever fleets to streets between iron bars I built that cage in deep heat and seep dire dreams once desired Suppose I’m a skeptic Roasted or disconnected Just jaded, just met you Always over it too soon Burnt but I’m amused. I’m useful.
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34
god gloats upon Her stunning flesh. Upon the rechings of Her green body among unseen things, things obscene (Whose fingers young the caving ages curiously con) —but the lunge of Her hunger softly flung over the gasping shores leaves his smile wan, and his blood stopped hears in the frail anon the shovings and the lovings of Her tongue. god Is The Sea. All terrors of his being quake before this its hideous Work most old Whose battening gesture prophecies a freeing of ghostly chaos in this dangerous night through moaned space god worships God— (behold! where chaste stars writhe captured in brightening fright)
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6.8k
God Gloats Upon Her Stunning Flesh. Upon
My memory beats in rhythm with my heart. Spilling out snapshot flashes of life like a flick book's muffled cries. Controversial plastic shell, elastic strap, stick insect mattel covetted for months until Santa dropped it down the chimney, almost as fast as she sprogged and regained her figure - the original scrummy yummy mummy set to spread low self esteem. My daddy said anyone can crank out a kid like she did, as my mother ground her teeth to protest on behalf of her traumatised frame. Strange, I almost became one of the lost - before I grew cells and self, another fragile foetus swinging on a noose from gallows where once a ****** failed to stayed closed. Little life curled tight self soothing sings al na tivke iredem bim'nucha My memory beats in rhythm with my heart as I lie beneath my shroud of sadness filled with down shrinking from the light of day I want to tell you that I love you, that my heart brays, beats, bleets, breaks, aches for you. My soul, spirit, self thrice chorus al na tivke iredem bim'nucha as waters flow from deep to deep where danger dances and solace is sought from beyond the fruitless orchards and willows weeping branches reaching out for you. My memory beats in rhythm with my heart surrounded by madonna, ***** and all betwixt spheres of life protruding, pronounced, announcing themselves; in streets where bundles, terrors, cherubs, banting, brat and bairn alike shriek, scream, squeal, shout, squalk, squabble, sing in a cacophony that makes my heart weep and ache in longing to sing to self in solitude al na tivke iredem bim'nucha. My memory beats in rhythm with my heart pulsating thoughts, dreams, hopes of you through the whole of me. Brought to my knees I seek wisdom, guidence, strength to let you go. The river is waiting for you, you who I hold tight in my caul trying to trust, seeking strength to hakshev le'ivshat haga'lim holding the thought of you, the love of you, the hope of you tight in my arms crooning my lullaby of lament al na tivke iredem bim'nucha
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Jun 26, 2013
Jun 26, 2013 at 5:57 PM UTC
River Lullaby
My memory beats in rhythm with my heart. Spilling out snapshot flashes of life like a flick book's muffled cries. Controversial plastic shell, elastic strap, stick insect mattel covetted for months until Santa dropped it down the chimney, almost as fast as she sprogged and regained her figure - the original scrummy yummy mummy set to spread low self esteem. My daddy said anyone can crank out a kid like she did, as my mother ground her teeth to protest on behalf of her traumatised frame. Strange, I almost became one of the lost - before I grew cells and self, another fragile foetus swinging on a noose from gallows where once a ****** failed to stayed closed. Little life curled tight self soothing sings al na tivke iredem bim'nucha My memory beats in rhythm with my heart as I lie beneath my shroud of sadness filled with down shrinking from the light of day I want to tell you that I love you, that my heart brays, beats, bleets, breaks, aches for you. My soul, spirit, self thrice chorus al na tivke iredem bim'nucha as waters flow from deep to deep where danger dances and solace is sought from beyond the fruitless orchards and willows weeping branches reaching out for you. My memory beats in rhythm with my heart surrounded by madonna, ***** and all betwixt spheres of life protruding, pronounced, announcing themselves; in streets where bundles, terrors, cherubs, banting, brat and bairn alike shriek, scream, squeal, shout, squalk, squabble, sing in a cacophony that makes my heart weep and ache in longing to sing to self in solitude al na tivke iredem bim'nucha. My memory beats in rhythm with my heart pulsating thoughts, dreams, hopes of you through the whole of me. Brought to my knees I seek wisdom, guidence, strength to let you go. The river is waiting for you, you who I hold tight in my caul trying to trust, seeking strength to hakshev le'ivshat haga'lim holding the thought of you, the love of you, the hope of you tight in my arms crooning my lullaby of lament al na tivke iredem bim'nucha
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38
an incredible incite (the ruthless volatility of words) ~for L.B.~ the only place of solitaire solitude in the city accompanies me like a faithful country dog that doesn’t know better to be afraid, of moving cars, sleepless night terrors and unscripted “dreams” where image and words say come “follow me” with ruthlessness and no cloying come hither looks and see and take and recall with perfect midnight blue sky clarity for the incredible incite of credible insight surfacing unexpectedly in a intemperate pool of slushy snow, that will be an ice storm of painful confrontations with naked inner truths standing outside in sunny sub zero playground there is great risk.  volatility gone wild. when the speed governor is removed and you live at 100 mph on local streets, when the merest slight of an accidental incidental touch transforms into an incite incident and hell is the threat that you will not die today and your own words will ruthless pull from the nerve places where sensible and sensual cannot coexist and this write this script is a poetical insight inside, an incredible incite and what your spilling is spaghetti sauce blood when you left your brain on broil, instead of the faking daily of slow simmering ineffectual intellectual words that just don’t cut the crap. your addiction complete, you cannot live without the incredible incite, the ruthless volatility of words, otherwise why rough write what you see in the blind beyond the blind 1/6/18 5:03am
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Jan 6, 2018
Jan 6, 2018 at 5:17 AM UTC
an incredible incite, the ruthless volatility of words
an incredible incite (the ruthless volatility of words) ~for L.B.~ the only place of solitaire solitude in the city accompanies me like a faithful country dog that doesn’t know better to be afraid, of moving cars, sleepless night terrors and unscripted “dreams” where image and words say come “follow me” with ruthlessness and no cloying come hither looks and see and take and recall with perfect midnight blue sky clarity for the incredible incite of credible insight surfacing unexpectedly in a intemperate pool of slushy snow, that will be an ice storm of painful confrontations with naked inner truths standing outside in sunny sub zero playground there is great risk.  volatility gone wild. when the speed governor is removed and you live at 100 mph on local streets, when the merest slight of an accidental incidental touch transforms into an incite incident and hell is the threat that you will not die today and your own words will ruthless pull from the nerve places where sensible and sensual cannot coexist and this write this script is a poetical insight inside, an incredible incite and what your spilling is spaghetti sauce blood when you left your brain on broil, instead of the faking daily of slow simmering ineffectual intellectual words that just don’t cut the crap. your addiction complete, you cannot live without the incredible incite, the ruthless volatility of words, otherwise why rough write what you see in the blind beyond the blind 1/6/18 5:03am
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People say marijuana is "The gate way drug" My response is Yes, the gate way to your mind And that is only if you make time, My mind is full of gates not yet unlocked Around each corner a new gate appears Fears, tears, and terrors all hidden behind gates, Once you unlock the gate all time stands still and all worries are gone, The mind is set free and time flows
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May 11, 2015
May 11, 2015 at 12:01 PM UTC
The Gate Way
*i was looking at an old and tattered black and white photo of my grandfather a man i never knew and wondered about his existence like a horizon of dissolution his soul enshrined in my own and like him and all creatures ultimately i remain defenseless against realities magnitude while my father loved me as a child he grew unkind over the years and we where set bitterly against one another other his tyranny and my disobedience as i gathered strategies craft by machinery of thought and festering gall he, the bully got bullied back by me and old age as we in tandem set fire to his sadistic golden age of disillusionment and here we are now the living and the dead still locked in a grudge a recurring spirit of revenge in a valley of tears before i myself join the ephemeral legions in a pile of stones and ashed corpses are we not a procession of long struggles and short pleasures a history of terrors and creatureness stooges bound by the wheel creation crucified by desire and the apathy of obliterations aftermath an archeology of death ruin upon ruins has God sinned against man or bestowed his grace mystified perfect and beautiful beyond measure yet to be discovered in an alternate reality?
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Nov 4, 2017
Nov 4, 2017 at 10:26 AM UTC
HORIZON OF DISSOLUTION
Concealed depression is Buying water proof mascara So you won't have to reapply makeup after each daily breakdown. Concealed depression is Laughing at everything so they won't question why your eyes always water. Concealed depression is staying up until 4 a.m because it's the only time you can ignore the world and no one will notice. ...Or concealed depression is taking three melatonins in hopes you'll sleep deep enough to keep the terrors at bay. Concealed depression is Staying consistently busy So your mind will be too exhausted at the end of the day to fight you. Concealed depression is the impatient selfish monster that burns bridges as you cross them. Concealed depression is feeding yourself lies like "I'm fine" or "I won't cry". Concealed depression is the uphill battle that you don't get to win once; it's a mountain you're forced to climb every single day. Concealed depression is silently screaming, hoping someone will have super sonic hearing, swoop in like a bat, and carry you under their wings. Concealed depression is never hugging too tightly or meeting a gaze too intensely in case your guts may slip out before you can catch them. So when they accuse you of changing, when they accuse you of rage and indifference, of violence and apathy, when they ask why you never called, when they ask why you never told them, all you can say is that concealed depression is like an overbooked hotel and there's only room for one. All you can say is that you were afraid Your darkness would drown them too and then there would be no one left to save you.
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Jul 21, 2017
Jul 21, 2017 at 2:52 AM UTC
Concealed Depression
Concealed depression is Buying water proof mascara So you won't have to reapply makeup after each daily breakdown. Concealed depression is Laughing at everything so they won't question why your eyes always water. Concealed depression is staying up until 4 a.m because it's the only time you can ignore the world and no one will notice. ...Or concealed depression is taking three melatonins in hopes you'll sleep deep enough to keep the terrors at bay. Concealed depression is Staying consistently busy So your mind will be too exhausted at the end of the day to fight you. Concealed depression is the impatient selfish monster that burns bridges as you cross them. Concealed depression is feeding yourself lies like "I'm fine" or "I won't cry". Concealed depression is the uphill battle that you don't get to win once; it's a mountain you're forced to climb every single day. Concealed depression is silently screaming, hoping someone will have super sonic hearing, swoop in like a bat, and carry you under their wings. Concealed depression is never hugging too tightly or meeting a gaze too intensely in case your guts may slip out before you can catch them. So when they accuse you of changing, when they accuse you of rage and indifference, of violence and apathy, when they ask why you never called, when they ask why you never told them, all you can say is that concealed depression is like an overbooked hotel and there's only room for one. All you can say is that you were afraid Your darkness would drown them too and then there would be no one left to save you.
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50
Underneath the leaves of life, Green on the prodigious tree, In a trance of grief Stand the fallen man and wife: Far away the single stag Banished to a lonely crag Gazes placid out to sea, And from thickets round about Breeding animals look in On Duality, And the birds fly in and out Of the world of man. Down in order from the ridge, Bayonets glittering in the sun, Soldiers who will judge Wind towards the little bridge: Even politicians speak Truths of value to the weak, Necessary acts are done By the ill and the unjust; But the Judgment and the Smile, Though these two-in-one See creation as they must, None shall reconcile. Bordering our middle earth Kingdoms of the Short and Tall, Rivals for our faith, Stir up envy from our birth: So the giant who storms the sky In an angry wish to die Wakes the hero in us all, While the tiny with their power To divide and hide and flee, When our fortunes fall Tempt to a belief in our Immortality. Lovers running each to each Feel such timid dreams catch fire Blazing as they touch, Learn what love alone can teach: Happy on a tousled bed Praise Blake's acumen who said: "One thing only we require Of each other; we must see In another's lineaments Gratified desire"; This is our humanity; Nothing else contents. Nowhere else could I have known Than, beloved, in your eyes What we have to learn, That we love ourselves alone: All our terrors burned away We can learn at last to say: "All our knowledge comes to this, That existence is enough, That in savage solitude Or the play of love Every living creature is Woman, Man, and Child."
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5.9k
The Riddle
Underneath the leaves of life, Green on the prodigious tree, In a trance of grief Stand the fallen man and wife: Far away the single stag Banished to a lonely crag Gazes placid out to sea, And from thickets round about Breeding animals look in On Duality, And the birds fly in and out Of the world of man. Down in order from the ridge, Bayonets glittering in the sun, Soldiers who will judge Wind towards the little bridge: Even politicians speak Truths of value to the weak, Necessary acts are done By the ill and the unjust; But the Judgment and the Smile, Though these two-in-one See creation as they must, None shall reconcile. Bordering our middle earth Kingdoms of the Short and Tall, Rivals for our faith, Stir up envy from our birth: So the giant who storms the sky In an angry wish to die Wakes the hero in us all, While the tiny with their power To divide and hide and flee, When our fortunes fall Tempt to a belief in our Immortality. Lovers running each to each Feel such timid dreams catch fire Blazing as they touch, Learn what love alone can teach: Happy on a tousled bed Praise Blake's acumen who said: "One thing only we require Of each other; we must see In another's lineaments Gratified desire"; This is our humanity; Nothing else contents. Nowhere else could I have known Than, beloved, in your eyes What we have to learn, That we love ourselves alone: All our terrors burned away We can learn at last to say: "All our knowledge comes to this, That existence is enough, That in savage solitude Or the play of love Every living creature is Woman, Man, and Child."
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60
I’ve never truly been diagnosed But I have some troubles Some ability to scare the living **** out of myself with my mind every single night Can never fully sleep without something happening Shall it be scratching, moaning, pounding on the walls Shadows, demons, or just my own self getting me Maybe voices or images, the thought of disasters A nightmare, body pains, or just my own mind not wanting me to sleep Pains in my chest that hurt worse with every beat Or maybe the sense of a presence looking over me I haven’t got a clue for the cause of these nighttime fiascos but it’s something every night The only source of release is when I turn on my phone to see a text from the person I love And even so, though it feels like a boundaries around me, I know something is out there waiting for me to turn off the lit screen and be face to face with the terrors that keep me awake at night
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Apr 29, 2018
Apr 29, 2018 at 2:12 AM UTC
Nighttime Fiascos
Her face displayed a smile, Her skin made out of false matters, She painted herself in gold. How beautiful where her skin, Her skin striking in the sun, The paint shone bright, And inchmeal, she melts. How could you paint Plastic out of gold? Have you dreamt of a world Filled with her infamous thoughts? Have you lived in a world Where her existence Is just a living nightmare? Beings? Night terrors? All because of a toxic Barbie doll. You sit by my wooden dresser There in the corner of my bedroom. Sweeter you look in front of me, Than the way you chatter behind me. Every piece I hold onto, Thee steal and smirk... Doing it as if I have not yet caught. You loved taking my heart into your palm. Breaking them into pieces And would make ******* out of them. What a waste for me to let you Break it for me. Call me bossy, Maybe I’m just clever. You could be so jealous I guess I’m just smart. Do you have those brains, too? I’ve heard you had none. You’re pulling me down, While you had nothing to brag about. The best of me, Oh that crap of yours, I give it my all, While you had none. Responsibility, what a word. Recalling the first times, You seemed to look innocent. It was memorable for you never liked me, Neither did I. “Best friend”? It is such a believable name, Isn’t it? But, I don’t remember it. “Stop being my friend” ****** then leave me behind. I would not be the one doing it for you. Opening your diary, While you never read mine. You ask how I was, I answered, “I’m fine.” Your concern? Angelic yet fake. Look now who’s a Barbie in her smile. I  am not playing puppets, I just knew what to do. I just had a lot of things in mind, Wishing you told me yours. I saw those words you held against me, “She’s this girl and she’s that.” You little ****** don’t be such a brat. My mother taught me gossiping is bad, Why do you do it to me? I looked like a villain but I was just a victim. Oh, I learned in my life... How I could say “no”, It is brave, little one. And to learn is to never trust And to never talk to a Barbie doll.
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Oct 29, 2018
Oct 29, 2018 at 7:43 AM UTC
Barbie Doll
Her face displayed a smile, Her skin made out of false matters, She painted herself in gold. How beautiful where her skin, Her skin striking in the sun, The paint shone bright, And inchmeal, she melts. How could you paint Plastic out of gold? Have you dreamt of a world Filled with her infamous thoughts? Have you lived in a world Where her existence Is just a living nightmare? Beings? Night terrors? All because of a toxic Barbie doll. You sit by my wooden dresser There in the corner of my bedroom. Sweeter you look in front of me, Than the way you chatter behind me. Every piece I hold onto, Thee steal and smirk... Doing it as if I have not yet caught. You loved taking my heart into your palm. Breaking them into pieces And would make ******* out of them. What a waste for me to let you Break it for me. Call me bossy, Maybe I’m just clever. You could be so jealous I guess I’m just smart. Do you have those brains, too? I’ve heard you had none. You’re pulling me down, While you had nothing to brag about. The best of me, Oh that crap of yours, I give it my all, While you had none. Responsibility, what a word. Recalling the first times, You seemed to look innocent. It was memorable for you never liked me, Neither did I. “Best friend”? It is such a believable name, Isn’t it? But, I don’t remember it. “Stop being my friend” ****** then leave me behind. I would not be the one doing it for you. Opening your diary, While you never read mine. You ask how I was, I answered, “I’m fine.” Your concern? Angelic yet fake. Look now who’s a Barbie in her smile. I  am not playing puppets, I just knew what to do. I just had a lot of things in mind, Wishing you told me yours. I saw those words you held against me, “She’s this girl and she’s that.” You little ****** don’t be such a brat. My mother taught me gossiping is bad, Why do you do it to me? I looked like a villain but I was just a victim. Oh, I learned in my life... How I could say “no”, It is brave, little one. And to learn is to never trust And to never talk to a Barbie doll.
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75
Behold the One with the Aries, the Ward of Santa Muerte Our 16th President voted by 16 million Filipinos this 2016 The 1st President from Mindanao from being Mayor of Davao…Duterte! He is One with MiJoRdGr (Miriam, Jojo, Rody, Grace) The 4 Opposition Presidentiables who defeated Mar Roxas And brought Liberal Party its great disgrace! The One with the Aries from the Land with War The Land of Promise – feared by typhoons, but filled with goons So from her came a Liberator among MiJoRdGr! That this One should war with our nation’s greatest horrors -Drug Lords, Liberals, Treasoners, Criminals & Terrorists- These powerful entities to our history are desecrators! So by being one with lawmakers, law enforcers & lawful people By the overwhelming power of the Supermajority Our country’s greatest terrors…Du30 shall conquer them all! But first, he must defeat his detractors – Leila, Leni & Trillanes These triple crooks who want to topple the government Are also said to be conspiring with EU, UN & US! Yet with Trump’s triumph, US is no longer an enemy Our American hatred weakened, our Chinese friendship strengthened As it established great friendship with Pres. Du30! Do not emulate the girl power of those Liberal crooks We got an Olympic medalist Heidilyn & Ms. International 2016 But Leila & Leni?...Can only ruin our country…like blasted nukes! Do not worry for we have Pacquiao as still winner & role model Alongwith Gen. Bato, a victim of yellow washing machine But these Pro-Du30 men…to criminals tough, to innocents gentle! May God allow this True Change to take place with continuity Let Pres. Duterte lead us for many more years to come For the Supermajority, for you & me… for our country! -12/30/2016 (Dumarao) *Our Golden Times During PDu30
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Sep 28, 2019
Sep 28, 2019 at 9:19 PM UTC
Our Golden Times During PDu30
Behold the One with the Aries, the Ward of Santa Muerte Our 16th President voted by 16 million Filipinos this 2016 The 1st President from Mindanao from being Mayor of Davao…Duterte! He is One with MiJoRdGr (Miriam, Jojo, Rody, Grace) The 4 Opposition Presidentiables who defeated Mar Roxas And brought Liberal Party its great disgrace! The One with the Aries from the Land with War The Land of Promise – feared by typhoons, but filled with goons So from her came a Liberator among MiJoRdGr! That this One should war with our nation’s greatest horrors -Drug Lords, Liberals, Treasoners, Criminals & Terrorists- These powerful entities to our history are desecrators! So by being one with lawmakers, law enforcers & lawful people By the overwhelming power of the Supermajority Our country’s greatest terrors…Du30 shall conquer them all! But first, he must defeat his detractors – Leila, Leni & Trillanes These triple crooks who want to topple the government Are also said to be conspiring with EU, UN & US! Yet with Trump’s triumph, US is no longer an enemy Our American hatred weakened, our Chinese friendship strengthened As it established great friendship with Pres. Du30! Do not emulate the girl power of those Liberal crooks We got an Olympic medalist Heidilyn & Ms. International 2016 But Leila & Leni?...Can only ruin our country…like blasted nukes! Do not worry for we have Pacquiao as still winner & role model Alongwith Gen. Bato, a victim of yellow washing machine But these Pro-Du30 men…to criminals tough, to innocents gentle! May God allow this True Change to take place with continuity Let Pres. Duterte lead us for many more years to come For the Supermajority, for you & me… for our country! -12/30/2016 (Dumarao) *Our Golden Times During PDu30
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Poppies blossom like open cuts. Ripe and red, they fill the air With a cloying sweetness So potent anyone downwind Must shut their eyes and breathe Through open mouths. Tasting The breath of flowers, they grow Nauseous and afraid. The fields sway in the hot breeze Until they resemble an ocean aflame - It is here, among these poppies, I have Found the blood of the Earth. It is moist and toxic, an acid eating away the soles Of all that wade through it. How many gaunt, pale bundles of bone Rest below these soft, red petals? No one dares to count. People do not fear such Lovely things - if they’ve only seen Pictures. How nice it must be To know nothing of poppies But their color, their shape. They seem almost beautiful - But you know better. You have stood waist deep in the Malignant fields, breathing the air That slowed your limbs - Turning your arms and legs into pendulums Swaying to the beat of the buds That encircle them - Until you knelt, weighed down, Nearly submerged by saccharine terrors, And cried, hoping the water leaking from your heart Would put out the fires you find yourself embracing. After all, during the darker hours Any light is better than no light at all (Or so something whispers in your tired ear). You know the horror of poppies - But still you have yet to plunge Past the black eyes of those red beasts - For when the wind blows clean, cold Air to you what do you do? You raise your arms and let yourself Feel as though you can fly - And one day…one day You will look down And see yourself above A ground free of poppies.
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Oct 24, 2014
Oct 24, 2014 at 3:48 AM UTC
Poppies
Poppies blossom like open cuts. Ripe and red, they fill the air With a cloying sweetness So potent anyone downwind Must shut their eyes and breathe Through open mouths. Tasting The breath of flowers, they grow Nauseous and afraid. The fields sway in the hot breeze Until they resemble an ocean aflame - It is here, among these poppies, I have Found the blood of the Earth. It is moist and toxic, an acid eating away the soles Of all that wade through it. How many gaunt, pale bundles of bone Rest below these soft, red petals? No one dares to count. People do not fear such Lovely things - if they’ve only seen Pictures. How nice it must be To know nothing of poppies But their color, their shape. They seem almost beautiful - But you know better. You have stood waist deep in the Malignant fields, breathing the air That slowed your limbs - Turning your arms and legs into pendulums Swaying to the beat of the buds That encircle them - Until you knelt, weighed down, Nearly submerged by saccharine terrors, And cried, hoping the water leaking from your heart Would put out the fires you find yourself embracing. After all, during the darker hours Any light is better than no light at all (Or so something whispers in your tired ear). You know the horror of poppies - But still you have yet to plunge Past the black eyes of those red beasts - For when the wind blows clean, cold Air to you what do you do? You raise your arms and let yourself Feel as though you can fly - And one day…one day You will look down And see yourself above A ground free of poppies.
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