"terd" poems - Hello Poetry

What in the world is wrong with me? Writing poems about gross stuff I see. Like ***** matter and old underwear Is there something odd up there? Poems all about maggoty dog poo, Popping pimples and what else did I do? I wrote a poem about a piece of **** And a guy blowing boogars in his soup One about a pickled pig in a jar Do I think this will make me a star? About a guy who was stuck on a bus Who had an accident and there was a fuss I also wrote one about my pet cat With tinsel in her **** What's up with that? I also have a poem about picking everything from teeth to **** and finger licking I wrote about an autopsy that happens when your dead Is there a short circuit inside of my head? You know I had to write about farting gas And what happens when something else you pass. And about a guy killing a bunch of birds Just because one, in his eye, dropped a terd About inflamed hemroids and rotten, spoiled meat And a terd eating dog. That's not neat! One about a boy not bathing for a month I wonder if that wasn't my millionth. I even have one about digging up old poo And one about changing diapers. Oh eww! I'm sure that soon there will be more to come With the way my brain works and where I'm from So 'til then I think I'll end this tirade And hope you'll read the next mess made.

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Oct 3, 2012

Oct 3, 2012 at 11:49 PM UTC

mike-west

What Is Wrong With Me?

What in the world is wrong with me? Writing poems about gross stuff I see. Like ***** matter and old underwear Is there something odd up there? Poems all about maggoty dog poo, Popping pimples and what else did I do? I wrote a poem about a piece of **** And a guy blowing boogars in his soup One about a pickled pig in a jar Do I think this will make me a star? About a guy who was stuck on a bus Who had an accident and there was a fuss I also wrote one about my pet cat With tinsel in her **** What's up with that? I also have a poem about picking everything from teeth to **** and finger licking I wrote about an autopsy that happens when your dead Is there a short circuit inside of my head? You know I had to write about farting gas And what happens when something else you pass. And about a guy killing a bunch of birds Just because one, in his eye, dropped a terd About inflamed hemroids and rotten, spoiled meat And a terd eating dog. That's not neat! One about a boy not bathing for a month I wonder if that wasn't my millionth. I even have one about digging up old poo And one about changing diapers. Oh eww! I'm sure that soon there will be more to come With the way my brain works and where I'm from So 'til then I think I'll end this tirade And hope you'll read the next mess made.

32

This morning I had to go ***** so bad I squeezed and I pushed with all that I had And after what seemed like a great battle I heard a ker-plunk from what I did straddle The mighty splash that this thing made To have a look, my curiosity bade So up I did rise slowly and sure So as not to drop any poo onto the floor I looked into the bowl not believing my eyes This terd was of a most bodacious size The cause of the strain was now easy to see I new then not what I had set free It leaned upright on the side of the bowl Like it was in a jacuzi relaxed and whole As I looked at it again in utter disbelief I knew I had to flush away my relief But when I pushed the handle on the toilet I found All the **** did is spin round and round Like a wooden stick in water being stirred I was amazed at the stiffness of this **** When the flush was done I looked with disdain The **** was still there and left not even a stain I flushed again with greater resolve And the **** broke in half as it did revolve But then as it started to finally go down Something then happened that made me frown It got stuck and clogged up the hole I watched in horror as water filled the bowl It plugged the toiled up tight like a cork And now I wished I'd chopped it up with a fork I grabbed the plunger from off of the floor And plunged real hard, for my toiled to restore But though I plunged with all of my might It seemed that the **** was winning this fight After several minutes the water went down But only at a trickle as again I did frown So along I did move from plan A to plan B I'd show this **** who's the boss, not it, but me So with hot water, a bucket I did fill And dumped it in so it could swallow that pill After twenty buckets, the **** did give way And I was able to flush. Hip-Hip-Hooray!

0

Dec 10, 2012

Dec 10, 2012 at 3:32 AM UTC

mike-west

The **** That Wouldn't Flush

This morning I had to go ***** so bad I squeezed and I pushed with all that I had And after what seemed like a great battle I heard a ker-plunk from what I did straddle The mighty splash that this thing made To have a look, my curiosity bade So up I did rise slowly and sure So as not to drop any poo onto the floor I looked into the bowl not believing my eyes This terd was of a most bodacious size The cause of the strain was now easy to see I new then not what I had set free It leaned upright on the side of the bowl Like it was in a jacuzi relaxed and whole As I looked at it again in utter disbelief I knew I had to flush away my relief But when I pushed the handle on the toilet I found All the **** did is spin round and round Like a wooden stick in water being stirred I was amazed at the stiffness of this **** When the flush was done I looked with disdain The **** was still there and left not even a stain I flushed again with greater resolve And the **** broke in half as it did revolve But then as it started to finally go down Something then happened that made me frown It got stuck and clogged up the hole I watched in horror as water filled the bowl It plugged the toiled up tight like a cork And now I wished I'd chopped it up with a fork I grabbed the plunger from off of the floor And plunged real hard, for my toiled to restore But though I plunged with all of my might It seemed that the **** was winning this fight After several minutes the water went down But only at a trickle as again I did frown So along I did move from plan A to plan B I'd show this **** who's the boss, not it, but me So with hot water, a bucket I did fill And dumped it in so it could swallow that pill After twenty buckets, the **** did give way And I was able to flush. Hip-Hip-Hooray!

42

Waking early in the morning and stepping out to see The sun rise to begin, the day so beautifully The sky was free of clouds and red off to the east Dark blue toward the west. For my sleepy eyes a feast. "Oh a flock of little birds flying overhead." I couldn't help but watch them, so I tilted back my head. Flying with great skill right over top of me. I couldn't help but ponder "How wonderouse a thing to be." And looking up to watch them, their beauty made me sigh But then one bird, dropped a terd, right into my eye It burned like a red hot poker, my eyeball was ablaze I let out a painful cry and wiped it from my face I tried to open my eye but the burning was too great And now those little frikin' birds, I really began to hate I swore to get revenge on that nasty little bird That had the gall to bullseye me with it's frikin' terd So I went to a store and purchased me a gun A semi auto twelve gage, that should get 'er done I purchased fifty shells each one filled with bird shot. And hoped to **** that little bird and watch it's body rot. So later in the evening of that very day With a patch over my eye to keep the pain away I formed the perfect plan to get my sweet revenge And blow away that flying band in a ****** killing binge I got up extra early and went outside and stayed Very quiet so as not to ruin my vengful killing raid. And just as I had hoped, like yesterday at this time. "Here they come!" I thought with glee "Vengence will be mine!" And just as they did yesterday, they flew right over head And I chuckled to myself, "That sucker's gonna be dead!" And as they came within my range, anticipation grew dire Jumping up, I started yelling, and with my gun opened fire "DIE YOU LITTLE TERD DROPPER!" Insanely I exclaimed BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! seven lives I quickly claimed BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! I Fired and more did fall I looked again, and checking, I saw I'd killed them all. And as I stood there looking at the little birds I'd killed I asked myself, "Was it worth it? Was my revenge fulfilled?" And as I contemplated these feelings that I had A certain guilt came over me and I started to get sad. But suddenly, in my eye, there was an awful burn And I then knew I was right to **** them in return.

0

Sep 30, 2012

Sep 30, 2012 at 6:43 PM UTC

mike-west

Into My Eye

Waking early in the morning and stepping out to see The sun rise to begin, the day so beautifully The sky was free of clouds and red off to the east Dark blue toward the west. For my sleepy eyes a feast. "Oh a flock of little birds flying overhead." I couldn't help but watch them, so I tilted back my head. Flying with great skill right over top of me. I couldn't help but ponder "How wonderouse a thing to be." And looking up to watch them, their beauty made me sigh But then one bird, dropped a terd, right into my eye It burned like a red hot poker, my eyeball was ablaze I let out a painful cry and wiped it from my face I tried to open my eye but the burning was too great And now those little frikin' birds, I really began to hate I swore to get revenge on that nasty little bird That had the gall to bullseye me with it's frikin' terd So I went to a store and purchased me a gun A semi auto twelve gage, that should get 'er done I purchased fifty shells each one filled with bird shot. And hoped to **** that little bird and watch it's body rot. So later in the evening of that very day With a patch over my eye to keep the pain away I formed the perfect plan to get my sweet revenge And blow away that flying band in a ****** killing binge I got up extra early and went outside and stayed Very quiet so as not to ruin my vengful killing raid. And just as I had hoped, like yesterday at this time. "Here they come!" I thought with glee "Vengence will be mine!" And just as they did yesterday, they flew right over head And I chuckled to myself, "That sucker's gonna be dead!" And as they came within my range, anticipation grew dire Jumping up, I started yelling, and with my gun opened fire "DIE YOU LITTLE TERD DROPPER!" Insanely I exclaimed BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! seven lives I quickly claimed BLAM! BLAM! BLAM! I Fired and more did fall I looked again, and checking, I saw I'd killed them all. And as I stood there looking at the little birds I'd killed I asked myself, "Was it worth it? Was my revenge fulfilled?" And as I contemplated these feelings that I had A certain guilt came over me and I started to get sad. But suddenly, in my eye, there was an awful burn And I then knew I was right to **** them in return.

42

My neighbor's dog is very strange I just wonder if it is deranged He takes a dump and then gobbles it up What the heck is wrong with the pup? It's the weirdest thing I've ever seen And quite nauseating in the extreme I recycle some stuff, but good grief! This is a bit beyond my belief! How does my neighbor really not know? Just take a look out your window! He must not know it though because He let's the dog lick him without pause. Maybe the dog has a sick sense of humor, Or maybe he just has a massive brain tumor. How can you not tell after you're licked? The very thought of it is making me sick! Doesn't his breath smell just a bit bad? Doesn't it smell like **** just a tad? I guess he saves alot on food. But holy crap! C'mon dude! Be alert and watch that pup! Eating it's terds! He gobbles them up! The dog needs time with Doctor Phil. Or at least be put on some kind of a pill. I'd tell the dude but I'll not be the one To tell someone such news. Not even for fun. So I'll let life go on and simply concede It's just the way that dog likes to feed But if I go over and visit him there Of his dog's kisses, I think I'll beware!

0

Sep 30, 2012

Sep 30, 2012 at 6:46 PM UTC

mike-west

Terd Eating Dog

My neighbor's dog is very strange I just wonder if it is deranged He takes a dump and then gobbles it up What the heck is wrong with the pup? It's the weirdest thing I've ever seen And quite nauseating in the extreme I recycle some stuff, but good grief! This is a bit beyond my belief! How does my neighbor really not know? Just take a look out your window! He must not know it though because He let's the dog lick him without pause. Maybe the dog has a sick sense of humor, Or maybe he just has a massive brain tumor. How can you not tell after you're licked? The very thought of it is making me sick! Doesn't his breath smell just a bit bad? Doesn't it smell like **** just a tad? I guess he saves alot on food. But holy crap! C'mon dude! Be alert and watch that pup! Eating it's terds! He gobbles them up! The dog needs time with Doctor Phil. Or at least be put on some kind of a pill. I'd tell the dude but I'll not be the one To tell someone such news. Not even for fun. So I'll let life go on and simply concede It's just the way that dog likes to feed But if I go over and visit him there Of his dog's kisses, I think I'll beware!

30

Have you seen people act He screams at a shop keeper with words that hurts He thinks his phone and his looks is what matters the most His car should be fancier than most All we look at are things that don't define who we are If you shout are you a man or does that make people understand If your phone is expensive that means your rich and you have fans It's funny how people think so materialistic now a days To them the really thing that matters is only a haze People who clean your street do it for a penny to earn They deserve my respect than a man with a gold earn Respect who are below you and know that in the end your made from sand So if you disrespect him is more better than you Think deep and don't be a stupid terd

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Nov 6, 2015

Nov 6, 2015 at 3:03 AM UTC

mubarak-zeinalabdin-mirghani

Nowadays

Have you seen people act He screams at a shop keeper with words that hurts He thinks his phone and his looks is what matters the most His car should be fancier than most All we look at are things that don't define who we are If you shout are you a man or does that make people understand If your phone is expensive that means your rich and you have fans It's funny how people think so materialistic now a days To them the really thing that matters is only a haze People who clean your street do it for a penny to earn They deserve my respect than a man with a gold earn Respect who are below you and know that in the end your made from sand So if you disrespect him is more better than you Think deep and don't be a stupid terd

14

Black bird Sunken word White teeth Gleaming reach Frost bite What a site Dog terd Something heard Long hair So beware Soft life Nothings right Full moon Many crimes No sun Hiding some Earthquake Many shake Hurricane Strong winds Killings Sorrow Death Beware War Forgiven Love Hate Peace Anger Right Wrong No tomorrow Just today Pain Heart What's Great Fantasy Illusions Milk Honey Bread Butter Is this A mistake

0

Jan 9, 2015

Jan 9, 2015 at 12:15 AM UTC

kidcalvoaolcom

2 lines

Black bird Sunken word White teeth Gleaming reach Frost bite What a site Dog terd Something heard Long hair So beware Soft life Nothings right Full moon Many crimes No sun Hiding some Earthquake Many shake Hurricane Strong winds Killings Sorrow Death Beware War Forgiven Love Hate Peace Anger Right Wrong No tomorrow Just today Pain Heart What's Great Fantasy Illusions Milk Honey Bread Butter Is this A mistake

46

in yes terd ay s questions another breath from yester day wont fit ? ... .. .

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Feb 22, 2018

Feb 22, 2018 at 10:05 PM UTC

lashingstars

we wont fit

in yes terd ay s questions another breath from yester day wont fit ? ... .. .

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