this morning when I opened my eyes
the light was breathing the window had a pulse
as if I was a body with unmystified senses
as if I could see deeper in everything that surrounds me
perhaps a remembrance of how
difficult it was for me to be in the world
with an immense sensitivity to the slightest movement of life around me,
how wondeful to attune to the wind, the leaves, the cacophony of beautiful words and deeds, the harmony in the blinking of strangers, the sway of steps on the streets, the collapse of the waveforms of dreams that we called reality
how hard to have a mind that might understand eventually that truth is complicated or not for every creature on the walks of life.
my essence is vulnerability my strenghts is my weakness for my foolishness there is no cure
don't have to look in the mirror to recognize
my human face, your human face, their faces
late in the night when I close my eyes I see only people, the beauty of the world, the cosmos created through pain, how
the morning of the day I was born was there, and everything was already breathing before me and everything will be still spinning its mystery when this excess of life will rob a last breath from me. I know I will be watching the breath of light, how everything gets illuminated when the time is ripe

I pray for knowledge,
understanding and wisdom
     to answer each question

And in case of doubt and uncertainty,
please clear my mind
     and bring back my self confidence

I also pray that you keep me in good shape,
give me strength not only in physical
     but also in mental, emotional and spiritual aspects

Guide me on my way to the exam place
watch over me all through out the exam days
     and sent your angels to calm me

May I overcome the fear of failure
and help me dwell on my strenghts
     instead of my weaknesses and lackness

I pray for everyone who will also take the exams,
may we not take this as a competition,
     bless us with perseverance and humility

Almighty Father,
please hold my hand
     and sit beside me

I know I did my best,
please do the rest
     and let your will be done

That happens in secret
Its halo of the unknown,
Always unexpected,
But deeply rooted,
In its perfect time,
Enlightened by its own,
As a new step,
Beyond your strenghts,
To lead yourself.

Black, blue and white
Like watching the ocean, the moon, the clouds, the starlight
At peace , there's a calm , there's still, the night
Yet below the deep , the bellows roar, there's war, a fight.

Red, white and black
There's passion standing amongst your brothers, people you know have got your back
We stand hand in hand, we focus on our strenghts and not what we lack
We march forward with no thoughts of going back
into the ocean, into the war

Purple, red and gold
We see the king, we hear the trumpet, we hear the saints sing the songs of old
We do not lose focus, we don't waiver, we do not shiver in the nights of cold
We do not waste thoughts on any precious sentiments,
We pull our swords, we stand bold.

and i smiled into my father’s face and eyes
when i wrote this, and he set off to work
and i set off to bed to sleep off
having fed the hangover to appear by noon of what i thought
to be the next day... :)
indeed i did feel lazy being a poet and not being a
journalist. and i know the dead poets' society
still lives on! it still lives on! even though he was an actor,
the dead poets' society still lives on!
but i still have my father's strength at 6am as a roofer
than the weakness of a poet at 6am in wish to be
a roofer - most of the agonies of man are explained by the strenghts / “apathies” of animals... who share none of our sensible inquests of the new arrival proclaimed as lord of mannor but the corner stone / messiah of our turnip pyramid constructed by eager termites... we have none of such composure between mammal and lizard... we then in pretence rule animal with man’s fake prosthetic heart as heart of hierarchy and as above? when with as an above no above we dare believe in, surely?! of what heart does serve and of what heart could serve, only the sensual it does, serve, and no other in the realm of the heart’s intent to think exchange heart for mind and allow mind the feeling enclosure of not thinking. what then? i mind my poetry is weakened such and such takes of what could never be mistook: but you know how a masculine profession was mistook for a feminine one? it only took a mother and a builder to say they differed: the builder’s mother said the hammer in sense, while the mother’s sunday am simply said, the nails frequent the builder’s hammer less than my son’s tears my husband’s eyes, even thought that thety do.... as i too wish robin williams was my english teacher... but... really... wasn’t #hatealcoholicsmuk -
but then i heard soulfly's tribe:
your tribe our tribe!
your life our life!
your god our god!
your tribe our tribe!
amazon mea culpa mea crux mea ego!*

it’s a shame most of our lives are lived only to anticipate
a said impromptu:
mr. johnny mayfair..
king’s cross the doors are parting
hence you depart;
and so much of life was,
missing the mongol tribe
that would have replaced flatmoor st.
and would have done so with a good intention
and a happy face of he who was a member of...
the mongol tribe... rather than the boredom of
flatmoor st. making it worth a wrinkle to age to 80
and only remember life as having played chess.

the thought of another human
falling wholeheartedly in love with me
is absolutely terrifying
because that would mean they would accept me, all of me
all of my beliefs, and faults, and strenghts, and weaknesses
me as a being and as a whole
they would see and look at and accept
and yet throughout all of that they would still love me

the concept of that i will never be able to accept
because there is a lot of me
there is a lot of personality, and thought, and being that goes into being me
i'm a human
and i'm a mess majority of the time
so why would someone look at me and talk to me
and thinks "wow, i absolutely love her"

and what makes it terrifying most to me
is that this human would first have to see the true me
the rough, over thinking, exhausted, emotionally inept me
they will see every inch of my soul and my existence
and they will see that not everything is exactly as i present it

and that is what is most shocking about it
to know that someone i absolutely adore does the same to me
throughout everything that i am
they still love me and accept me

My worst fear is not to have any fears...
For without fear...
I would have no courage...
Courage is what keeps me going...
Is the force behind my strenghts...
And what helps me overcome my weaknesses...
We are humans...
We must value our strenghts...
And we must understand our weaknesses...
Have no fear...
You can overcome any fears...
For there is no fear that can subdue your spirit...

give applause to the blind judge, hats off to the deaf law
nobody remembers right from wrong
oops brain glitch, not permanent
or is it
has it all become a conspiracy or should i go back and study psychology
i used respect as money, earned some bad habits and honey,
Got time and some std's
Dont forget it,yeah i dont regret it thats why i said it
lost control,sold my soul, for what ?
popularity, clarity,insanity? SO THEY SAY
I like to call it Love
Is this a spell or, is Love just a butterfly floating beautifully in hell
Brother and mother,wife and children, strenghts and weakness' we all fulfill them
Head up here's a moto
quitters never win and winners never quit
wait why am i sparying this nobody is listening lol

Give up or build up your strenghts.

Do planks and set ups also push ups.

Is it best too work out longer or shorter?

Shorter at intense, range will yeild epic results.

These are your planes work out 53 days.

Each day do 29 push ups 55 sets ups 300 pull ups.

Remix take protein supplements for ******* help.

Drink water only devotion is key in your resume.

Only thang's too focuse on are as follows.

Strenght and power calm and control your breaths.

Work out 3 to 4 mins use stop watch.

As your body, will change rapidly am a body developer skilled, at development and production of hulks.

I have to admit,
I want you,
I want you so bad,
I want your positive energy
You´re strenghts,
Your kindness,
Your selflessness,
Your ambition,
Your passion,
I want to look into your blue eyes,
Hold onto your strong arms,
I´ve never been so sure about wanting something,
Do you feel the same way,
Do you want me like I want you,
I have to know..

Do not falter before midnight
Because absolutely I need you,
               warm and close
Because I need from your open empire
Do not falter before midnight

Refrain from any aversion or madness
Don't touch yourself
even to comb your hair
Stay unique, curious and pure
Please, do not give up

Because I feel abandoned and forgotten
I need from the light of your cave
that shelters me from the cold
I only ask for protection and warmth

Because I wander in this cold winter
all alone as a lost lover far from home
Please, do not falter before midnight
before I could get to you tonight

It would be unfit if I find you broken
and with all your gates covered
Or worse; occupied or blocked
Because then I would die from cold

So take my strenghts and will to go on
And please do not give up
Do not falter before midnight
because I need you more than ever
in this cold winter were I am lost
Do not falter before midnight

for quite some time now i have been wondering how great men would think, plan and excute things.
what i should've been focusing on is his character.
The battles he fights regularly
his emotional strenghts
his weaknesses.
for he faces them everyday, until the day that his physical body ceases to exists
yet he still remains.

what makes him strong?
though he knows that he is still weak?
though he knows that some of his decisions were fatal, to say the least...
what makes him strong enough to face tomorrow?
or to face his friends and smile?

what makes him push forward
when everything around him:
his friends, relatives, situation
is running the other way...
what makes him walk an extra step? though his kness could've given up
1000 meters ago?

what makes him tick?
is it his pure will
and guts
and instinct?
or maybe, just maybe
he has gotten used to this battle...
that his body is moving involuntarily, to do what is right in the eyes of God
so what makes him tick?

when he is down, and his heart is frail...
what makes him smile?
surely it isnt a fake one
though crying would have been the easier option...
and quitting could have been the easier way out.

how much passion does he have?
so that he could withstand the coldness of every grim
... of being alone in his decisions...
what intensifies him? is it the goal?

what makes a man?
so that he could be strong willed
enough to make sacrifes again
and again and again
that though the earth beneath him is shaking, he still stands firm

so what makes a man... to become a rightful inheritor
of this gift...
which is called "calling"?

i know, i will not age
and lose my eyesight
before i see...
truly see...
and understand
what makes a man.