"stonecold" poems
Her mind was in Hawaii,
Dancing under waterfalls,
Wandering through rainforests,
Picking tropical flowers and
Braiding them into her hair,
Simmering on sandy beaches,
And gazing at the stars.
Her heart was in Normandy,
Eating crepes and sipping lattes,
Strolling through spring green fields
And along lazy river banks,
Kissing the walls of castles,
And scooping up scallop shells,
Soaking up French syllables.
Her hands were in her pockets,
High-fiving friends and
Running through her lover's hair,
Sewing, cooking, washing,
Punching, tearing, scratching,
Caressing and confessing,
Catching the very first drops of rain.
Her feet were on the streets of Seattle,
Tapping to the rhythm of the bass,
Shuffling in and out of the rain,
Dodging puddles and strangers,
Observing art and sculptures,
Chasing down a taxi or her dog,
and embracing the crisp autumn air.
Her lips were on the edge of a soda can,
Singing along to her favorite songs,
Whispering sweet nothings into the air,
Empowering the impoverished
And scorning the injustice,
Kissing a forehead, lips, and hads,
And stonecold silent as her mind does the work.
Her eyes were fighting back frosty tears,
Swallowing scarlet sunsets,
Painted in yesterday's make up,
Tracing your stoic silhouette,
Rolling like thunder before the storm,
Lapping up dizzying moonlight,
And buried in words, and words, and words.
Her body was in Los Angeles,
But, she was on a metanoia,
Breaking free of past and future
To find herself a presence
That would always be worth fighting for,
To reach sophrosyne, namaste,
And to put her frantic body to peace.
Jul 29, 2015
Jul 29, 2015 at 2:53 AM UTC
Sailing soft, frozen in time--
Sat on your chair where I could've sworn
I saw a past life regression flash along
Your face. Stuck there now,
I'm alone now and forever forth.
For years I stored half my cash into a box
without second thought
just to end up spending it all in six months.
that last crash erased all the academic pablum
that proved less required reading
more distraction.
Just a border now,
head against an extending wall,
Witless and stonecold sober;
At ease with every unanswered craving
And coexisting with a life where nothing goes
according to plan.
Oct 18, 2020
Oct 18, 2020 at 1:11 PM UTC
I witnessed the foreshadowing of my once bright sky,
How living memories started to die
Fathom my happy life instantly turn into lie
Give me a second and I fool everyone a treacherous smile
It began with... I don't know actually
Maybe when people turned their backs from me
While their constantly saying that they'll never leave
They aren't even aware that in every day they did
Then, my fragmented soul, I promised, I'll be tougher
Like a stonecold in the midst of sober
Because in this universe, I am a one of a kind hue
That can't even blend with the beautiful colors of you
So today, I'll be climbing Mt. Forlorn
And dive in the deepest sea of thorns
So honey, listen to me, have sense of alertness
Even your own shadow will leave you in darkness
Jan 17, 2018
Jan 17, 2018 at 8:24 AM UTC
the fireworks trapped in his eyes
freed by the tears rustling
dried out within me
spark by dying spark
all had fell the same
& here we are tonight, one
not-long-ago night
we were here
you looked through me
as if I'm an everbright light
& our firefly hearts
ignited into the wildest
of fireworks
we surrendered
all our withheld lights
to a shallow sky
the way you faded shadow-dark
in the stonecold
of a hollow fire
while I'm still here
we're but back here
where we fell in love
then out of it & now
I look like the brightest light
running out of you
we were but just mere men
who fell in love it was
when we fell in love
that we fell in love only to tell
goodbye
Aug 18, 2019
Aug 18, 2019 at 3:23 AM UTC
that man...
he's a goner trapped in a physical flesh
he trusts no one
well, I guess
and hatred is feasting his soul
he's a stranger everyday and no one
knows him
that man...
he's good at deprecating himself
in his mind, you'll find an eccentric kind
of chaos
in his heart, it is over a negative hundred fahrenheit
-- stonecold.
but that is my man
he is a beautiful chaos
I see him as precious as a water to this earth
I want to hold him moreover a forever
until he bleeds no more
until he could smile a genuine one
until his heart becomes warm in my embrace
but my man clothed himself
in thick sheets of anxiety
yet, I will reach brokenness to cover him
with my love, I'll do it until it fix him
yes, I really love that man.
Jan 5, 2019
Jan 5, 2019 at 12:03 AM UTC
Man starts dreaming—
greedy dreaming.
He begins to burn
a different kind of fire.
His heart like an ember
can be fiery and fervent
can burn a silhouette
a shadow in love
a ghost in grief
all in his deep shades
of crimson blue.
Here he is
here he's been
here he will be
burning memories–
photographs and things in pages
curling into black
the stench of obliviun
is one with the smoke
that is how he builds
a different kind of fire.
Plunged his hand
it shines in his very eyes
dancing gracefully
like a wild gloriosa
rustled by the winds
restlessly,
like a scarlet swan
in a lake of stonecold ashes,
as if the only thing at peace
in a holocaust of memories.
Then stares back
before it sways back
into being the ordinary flame
it was.
If he would listen
the fire has a pulse
a flicker beat
almost like his.
The flame did not burn him
as if it has always been
a part from within
as if he was made out of it
as if it was made out of him.
He felt the soul of the fire.
It's pulse—
felt like home.
Jul 20, 2019
Jul 20, 2019 at 2:26 AM UTC
I push you away
Roll my eyes on you
Put my hands in my hips
Till you leave
So I can cry
In bittersweet relief
Leave, I tell you
I do not care
I have myself
And that is all I need
But when you leave
I look out of the window
Watching you go
Praying you will turn around
Come back
And finally
See me
How I really am
But I can not show
I can not break
I need to be strong
So before I cry
I will scream
Before I break
I will go
The world has teached me
That those that show weakness
Will be run over
So I pretend
Till one day I don't have to
But you never turn around
And my heart
It keeps breaking
As I push you away
It scares me
How good I can lie
How I can pretend
To be stone cold
While I break
In silence
Mar 12, 2019
Mar 12, 2019 at 12:40 PM UTC
the midnight wind howls
a petal is plucked
from the lotus' heart
it drifts away
the reflection of the moon
snow-white
on the frozen pond—
illuminates
the lotus beneath the ice
it's stonecold lonely
when you're only a touch away
but we're forever apart
when there's no ripple anymore
but blossoming thorns of ice;
as the midnight wind lulls
the last shred of hope fluttered
from the frozen, sullen heart
it withers away
across the sky-deep, empty hollow
to the infinite darkness beneath
scentless
& snow-white
Jan 17, 2021
Jan 17, 2021 at 10:07 AM UTC