i.
you are the cruelest person I've ever
met but my heart still beats really
fast whenever I think about 
you. I'm afraid if I touch 
you I'll burst into 
flames again. my 
hands haven't stopped shaking since you
left and I never got to thank you for teaching me the meaning of the word
hurt. I found my 
poems at the bottom of your
garbage can and I still can't 
sleep alone. I 
kissed you a lot, and sometimes, you kissed me
too.  

ii.
your skin rings up memories of moonlight and 
granite, a gaping
desert lying open like
it's as vulnerable as
you when it gets
dark. you have a murderous look in your
eye but you never broke a hair on my
head, you saved every phone log of every time I ever
called you. i heard your last girlfriend got arrested for domestic 
abuse and you never wrote to tell me. did it
hurt you more than 
I could? I hope you found what you were
looking for out there and I hope you never
lose it unless you
want to. 

iii.
something about your
eyes makes me want to know everything about the middle of the
night, I watch you
move and I whimper inside my
head. I haven't touched you in what seems like two whole
lifetimes, if I ever even did at
all. I hope I can again some
day. years later and your music stillI makes my ears
raw. I hope that bullet didn't
hurt too bad, I hope 
it brought you the happy. I'm sorry I never
could. 

iiii.
we are a modern day romeo and juli
et, it took me two 
years to realize how lovely your
lips looked and I'm still wrecking 
barriers, I'm still 
damning christ. my best friend has made it
clear she does not want me as a 
sister. I wish they'd let me
love you because you, you are all I've got
left. I might be the bullet but I will never be the
shooter, I'll take everything on
myself. you are so fragile and i am so 
sorry.

I feel that I fall for
More than I stand for
That's not gonna fly and therefore
I can't join the air force
Killing time
and showing no remorse
allowing life to take its natural course
Of course I failed to see
that effort is the source of sorcery
involved in letting life take form

My real eyes see lies
like mr shakur said
stillI see no changes,
but mr shakur's dead
so many thoughts go running through my head
dreams of people qouting rhymes that I said

When I'm dead
Bury my beside my book of rhymes
so I can write these clever little lines
for all of time

Don't shed
a single tear for me
instead please learn to see
the world for what it is
not what it appears to be
I do this all for free
just to spread some positivity
Cause I believe that positive can live
for all eternity
if we can learn to be
the  living form
of poetry

flowing like a river to the ocean
my emotions stream
from me to you so let me say in closing
That I hope they help
to lift your load and let you shed your loathing.

Sadness is killing my own character,
past is now a memory and present is the badest chapter,
nothing is well nothing is fine,
all things are like killing me from behind,
pains and aches now are regular,
it dosent mean that it dosent hurt in today's time and i scream within darkness andmy dreams are now going 2 shatter,
dreams are now lost in the scary dark side of my self,
my books are still in the shelf,
from last year,
and the mask of happiness i wear,
to show that i am all fine and all is going regular as a daily daily servivce,of good things m happening in my life and also from them i love and have care,
but i know it's not more than just a imagination of them,
i know what i am going through and no 1 tries 2 help but when,
they will ask for help i'll do for my past's good character's sake,
still m tryin 2 get up but stilli know it's not possible it's fakeDream...