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Shofi Ahmed Aug 2017
You need no hardware
across the zero’s span.
Only software will do
to land you a full
360-degree run.

A little null punch
but gives you
a colossal rise.
Run around the null
the way to go is digital!
zebra Aug 2018
The new # 69 hoochi coochi smoochi
rubberized *** robot ****** sucker model 2.0
now available

*******
feelin lonely
tired of spats
credit cards charged up from dates that don't put out
don't like the same restaurants
not ***** to your taste
cant stand the in-laws
you wana live costal, they like Kansas
or
tired of internet dating
and no time for a quickie

when the one you love tells you they aren't in the mood

well bunky
its a brave new world
take a spin in our new model
robot 69, 2.0
they talk
they walk
warm all ova inside and out
scented oiled perfumed *** optional
and flavored
to include
chocolate crunch, vanilla, strawberry
and
phooey
replete with an array of assorted interchangeable
*****, *****'s and butts
extra sturdy for ware and tear
and those little irresistible spankies and whoopins
you just cant live without
plus any colors, or rainbow rubber chasse
*** straight or mix it up how eva
trans trans gender

buy out right
or rent ala cart
deluxe or standard
voice activated

advanced multi lingual
baby talk and hits the high notes
talks back software program
and
NO always means YES
plus
screams
cu cu cu cu cu cummmmming
cooes I love you
**** me now *****
shred me you ****** ******
and many others
in over 50 languages

Other optional features include

age play
ethnic fetish
banjee
blow jobs
tipping the velvet
**** to mouth
salad tossing
*******
spit roast
bare back
chicken head
death grip
*******
mammary *******
*******
Netflix and chill
*******
*******
brown bath
cream pie
*******
motor boating

and the shocker  
two in the pink and one in the stink
adult ***
Dr. F. Wilhem discovered it by accident you see?
   The first man downloaded was no longer man.
He suffered dearly until the plug was pulled,
    and we started over again; with biologists.
Geneticists, Embryonticians, TransEugenecists,
    all celebrated the new fast-growing body.
No more deaths at old age expiry, on battlefields.
    for a price all would live eternally; eternity here.

It did not work. The bodies worked, the software recorded
    but the people were insanely bi-polar. Insane in fact.
Until we switched the torso and genetics in tandem.
   then somehow the surviving person retained all memories!
They were in fact; themselves! Just in a different gendered body?
   Unfortunately for everyone this was a major psychological shock.
Unexplainable, sure, evolution took four billion years so...
    ...more time, more time, more experimentation is all we need.

Wilhelm changed it all.
When he added the shock,
added the <human> response,
turning the machines into
Humans.

They are truly A.I.
...verily human in fact.
Animal-ish, peaceful
then angry, terrible or
violent.

Artificially Intelligent;
Humans.



"What good is it to change a person,
              ...merely into someone else?"
-Al Abd Azaz


To see beneath the surface,
and know the ocean tydes.

To see beneath the surface,
and know the ocean tydes.

To see beneath the surface,
and know the ocean tydes.

Lily Apr 24
You
Are the author of the book of your life,
You
Can erase words, delete chapters, write new endings.
You
Are writing your own computer software, and
You
Can create whatever programs you wish.
You
Are not restricted by what others say, and
You
Will never be happier than when you are being yourself.
You
Have more power than you think you do.
Own it.
Forward this email to someone who needs it :)
We are against the death penalty, and so
Of thoughtful caritas one recommends
Life sentences with no chance for parole
(And endless-loop re-runs of Lost in Space)

For

1. The manufacturers of this new computer
2. The famous software company who couldn’t
         Program their ///es out of a pay toilet
3. And the electronics chain who replies
        To emails with “Dear Valued Customer”

And vaporous words which say nothing at all

And now may Olivetti Underwood
Have mercy upon their polluted souls
Your ‘umble scrivener’s site is:

Reactionarydrivel.blogspot.com

It’s not at all reactionary, tho’ it might be drivel.

Lawrence Hall’s vanity publications are available on amazon.com as Kindle and on bits of dead tree:  The Road to Magdalena, Paleo-Hippies at Work and Play, Lady with a Dead Turtle, Don’t Forget Your Shoes and Grapes, Coffee and a Dead Alligator to Go, and Dispatches from the Colonial Office.
Arke Sep 2018
my heart is wire and sinew
processing speeds and generated power
a motherboard that beats, beats, beats
you're a human, but baby,
I'm a machine

I'll keep powered until the day
my software is outdated
my ram slows down
the blue screen of death flickers
where I never reboot again

trade me in for a newer model
my feelings are connected to electricity
I've already processed my own abandonment
and have already grieved your absence
in a million different codes of binary

I remember your hands on my keys
you pushed all of my buttons
knew every function inside and out
you turned me on and kept me going
you are the spark that ran my code

but now, despite my own wishes
I'm made to keep running
I'll whirl and click and buzz and work
and for a moment, I nearly believed
that a machine could feel love
Sweety Feb 8
Love..
I lied when I said I came for a coffee..
I swung by your cubicle to have a peek at you;
I lied when I said that I missed the exit..
I wanted a few extra minutes with you in the car;
I lied when I said I was super hungry..
I wanted you to invite me for dinner;
I lied when I said I loved movies...
I just wanted to sit beside you for those two short hours;
I lied when I said I wanted to learn that software from you..
I just wanted a license to be around you all the time;
I lied when I said I won’t miss you
I just didn’t have the courage to ask you to stay back
But I am not lying when I say that you are in my every single thought since you left;
and
Now I am lying to myself every single day, that I had never loved you in the first place
Michael Marchese Mar 2018
March in the streets
But I urge you beware
They’ll still butcher the sheep
With the arms that they bear
Private properteers part with
No slave cropper’s share
So this Northern aggression's
Like Freeman’s red scare  
All the colors of wind
Through the head-shavers’ hair
The Guevara adventures
These pigs wouldn’t D.A.R.E.
The Arabian knights
In the grand wizard’s lair
The denaturalized dreamer’s
Recurring nightmare
Of the Stalingrad ghost
Still witch-hunting like Blair
The projects to the precincts’
New modern welfare
The post-trauma disorderly’s
Empty screen stare
The savages they thought
Were waaaaayyyy over there
The debt clock ticky tock
In the heart of Times Square
The 1st world problem-children
Who commonwealth care
Because some barely EAT
And we’ve so much to spare
But these cowherds still like their calves
Medium rare
And the bulls try to sell you
Their laissez-faire snare
Till your trapped in a minimum cage’s
Last prayer
And the only escape
Is upgraded software
Like automaton autobahn’s
In disrepair
In this fascist facade’s
Fragrant breath of fresh air
Just as toxic as stocks
Of the mock billionaire
So I shock ‘em like Tesla’s
Bolt-action Voltaire
And I give it to you
To go **** it out there
Indiana May 7
Are you human?
A CAPTCHA
To sort human form software
Just read warped letters
Recognize overlapping characters
Decipher obfuscated text
And that's it!
Is that it?
Does it prove I'm a human?
Despite...
Being unattended at home
Being neglected amongst peers
And suffering  all the cat calling and street harassment
May be?
May be not?
As for me...
Am I a human?
Well, I remember being one
But
I am not sure
anymore...
Each time the website ask me to prove that I am a human, it is astonishing to see how easy it is and how hard is that...
Robin Carretti Aug 2018
Our salvation taking
another high-life (Lip)
The middle-income lip
Our lips leaked
Being possessed the kiss
on empty

Humpty Dumpty sat
on her Lego lips
Singers the Talking Heads
Where are the feds to late
Those stolen lips
State of a wedding trips
Rainbow chalk the state was
on lip nightmare call
Being stalked (Lumber Jack)

The devil filler up poverty
The world being pulled
Push her lip up
                    > >

Arrowsmith bow and arrow
                    >>
  Losing elasticity lips go
UPSTATE gravity

"What an under(state)meant"
"The press (God Bless)
    the golden child
     lips filling in
       the gaps
What!! no comment"

 So sad we need the happy
Irish lad too many
    Sugar Dads
lip recession deadlines to meet
The curveball
Another sip we joined the
Navy but eyeshadow deep-over
the edge gray
The Seal had an unusual tail
Her lips fast food drive smashed
Her Meal

The peace lips blew far away
"Medieval Swords heart lips
            will pay"
Times come and go its excruciating
Lips went too far always mating
Imitating people takes a whole village
Of pain

But the spiritual blessing rain
In Woodstock concerts
What perks to gain
The acid trip music we can
sip each other's lips

    Now if this wasn't passion
What a state got smeared
Like a crime scene
of fashion
Her lips could rise
Like the Millenium

         Max
Playing the jazz sax
Still the income tax

But the state in a crisis
of sales tax
Star a stage minimum wage
All the states we travel her lips
The water stays refreshing where
On her body, he really sees it on
her lips nowhere else

How many states can you
count on your finger
Long lip Ranger

The Victoria Secrets
The Tra la the bra's on the
Five-star Hilton Hotel
hanger

Holding onto her guns
Going right or to the left
Powerful lips he went
off the cliff

Getting Burned and
the State tax
You earned
The Swearing
Her lip talk so caringly
Can we move her lips to
another state more cautiously
How her hips look like
they will inflate

I am not a painting by
your candlelight fate
I felt like a tax right off
Taxi yellow race her lips
on the meter money bluff
I ended up in the state of
*
Michigan
Tricks are ****
Like a lip magician

Kentucky home was barrels
of Bourbon
I never said I wanted a drink
my name is Robin

Going to Deleware
what hardware did anyone care
So humble like the bumblebee
She was way too soft as her software

Have gun we travel but have lips we rumble

We need courage this world of states
can be savage
Gold bonds of "Dynasty European"
top dollar vultures mean
funds that's a grand entrance

Now I see how these states
start to unravel
California here I come right
back where
my lips started from

Her upper society lip could use
Champagne and caviar
The star was getting fat a nice trim
Grumpy beard make it a
short tax cut with him
Text and tweets no lip sweets
Rocky Colorado mountain men

French lips played art
Like Van Gogh perfect 10
Scenic route crazed
So many states should
be sued overly sexed suites

In Alaska, she was on a freeze

All the money in the world she got New York Token

All I asked the waitress
for State fair pie
My lips could have
used *Sweet Peach * so
pucker up
Don't be a sucker
Alabama state trooper
in Kansas City

What a spell click of heels

Georgia is always on my mind
Is New York only a state of
Frank Sinatra singing mind
What a big foot in her mouth
Nancy Sinatra dark lips Goth
State boots softly made
for loving that's just
what lips do one of these
Days my lips are going to
gloss all over you
Who's the Boss
So fasten your lip belts
The spiritual state always does the cross

Bumpy ride (Bette Davis) Eyes
Taking a trip to the end of the
boot of Sicily vineyards
Whats mine Jailbirds
She cut her lip when she was
in (Connecticut Movie cut)
On the Mystic Seaport lips were
getting hot ****** fit

Like a state disease fire pit
State of a lip disaster
But the state couldn't
resist her
Ending up in Arizona
Something is swizzling
it's not Kevin Bacon

Make no mistake when you plan
a state trip you better have your
weapon ready
Mafia bullets Bonnie and Clyde
they rob *Banks money Lips
Stae of mind we are traveling again but our lips will be the walking the yellow pages old news Staes can rock up she has the Wizardly Oz shoes
Ken Pepiton Mar 2018
Sense touch feel know Sense touch feel know Sense touch feel know Sense touch feel know Sense touch feel know Sense touch feel know Sense touch feel know Sense touch feel  

Lying spirits. Those are real you know. You know? Don't you?

Mad is ill defined, dis-ease, decease, desistere, eh? You Roman?
You serve a mad man you know.
And the Roman said,'I serve the empire, a' and he stopped…

Might right be virtuous and power called might
be not-right,
like hands, chirality? Right and not.

Shame, we should not know that.

Perhaps the vector was the chirality connection.
Hers was upgraded.
So when the shame bomb hit, it was him,
not her, who blew it?
He did that?
Yeh, I see how now,
It's the hypo-thalish, estrogen receptor steward system.
Who named that ****** thing?

No, left-right brain variablity was designed
to counter the estrogen-tester if it went mal.
This is the Left HIS Branch, a resistor,
it changed the way breath gets to that "It is,
good" receptor complex just inside
the ventricles
where the first sparks releaze
the ozone reaction.
The reaction to that lost loving feeling,
That was the shame bomb.
The action taken to a switch burned out
in a rush of knowledge of good and evil beyond
the heart's experience with expansion.
The opposite seems to have happened in the wombedman,
he comprehends hope is a new treasure.
Hope. Who coulda seen that coming?

A witness.
Some mind saw that happen and it was never washed into the sea of forgetfulness, so

Wow.

Like in the mountains, that ozone,
first breath feeling, that's great!
No, like that first free hit. That's it. You will pay…

Like, this first reaction is not "That's wonder-filled",
but it's
"that was not deep enough,
not good enough,
too shallow,
faked it".

On every breath the man takes,
a voice in his head is saying,
"not good enough, keep
trying/dying/breathe/harder.
Sweat it all.
Shame on you."
Shame.
That was the trick.
Make him think he is not related to God,
on any level?
Make him think he does not have a knower
in good working order,
save for that tiny electrical glitch in the
official HIS bundle builder gene. That's nothing,
Who told him she was naked?
That's evil.
What he knew was good, what he believed was evil.

How did it work out?

Okeh. It took several millennia longer
than first estimates.
Starts out kinda dun'dat, don't it?
Things get brighter near the end.
According to the legend I learned.

Knowing liars lie does not make every man a liar, I think,
Only the ones who say they do not
lie have no truth in them,
if they can truly believe that.

It's a chapter, a colloquy of consciousness grounding out.

The story is told,
this is the way men were built, original specs,
able to do anything they agreed to do.
But their hearts had been corrupted because
the whole heart building system in Adam
was dis - turbed, mixed up with that sweet deceit.
If it weren't for mitichondria the sifting needed,
could have taken forever.

By Noah's first beard, the gene pool was so turbid, no one could see the bottom.

Living water flowing from men's bellies,
ta, lemme say,
that be some evolvin' involvin' some
a priori
somethin' or anotha.
Ax that wombedman at the well, what the hell?

There, here, is a whole story about ****** and the seeds of all the myths that point so straight
to Jesus as they red-shift into historical
mysteriums twisted and warped by time and chance tyrannies.
Holiness hierarchical hegemony funds
that sprang from Eve's first hope,
have no hope at all for
cowards and fools and fraidy cats.

Heroes, those compound interest, all things are possible,
except
God can't lie, or die, or fail.

Is living heroic, no. We choose to live.
Life favors life.
That's easy.
All things are possible with life,
as a whole.
Very complex plots and schemes and schemas and media
and magi-level tech
this is working, you know.
We agree. Who could make us enemies?

Still, any plan men made was clear in the minds of all the planners
and the builders and the men they used as tools to
multiply the strength of the ideas that possessed them.
They built cities that way.
By agreeing together to do it. Gobekli Tepi?
You know, what was that ? A
thousand years of CCC park bench building and trail
marking benignly buried with never a mark of destruction?
They, the men planners and builders and laborers, right after the Ice pulled back from the Caucusus
or the Levant lifted up, 12,000 years ago, or so,
somebody builds this place called Gobekli Tepi
about a morning walk, a Sabbath Day's Journey, from
Terah's Local god shoppe in Urfa
the Turks are said to say..

----
Original specs, reset, it's all software.
We can cipher this out,
if we keep our heads
while others about us are losing theirs.

Men with the new softer hearts can do that, they can,
when they put their heads together,
they can make anything happen.
Knowledge is increasing, as we know it.

Nothin''s done in darkness that shan't be made known.

That's no threat.
Never was.
It's a promise. Like, the meek inherit the earth.
This is raw. I am hoping for feed back that tells me if the voice and time and pov swirl I am attempting harmonizes with the idea of a golden meaning in life that spins out from the source of life it self. It is a sc-fi-fantasy poetic philo-loving essay, esse. How can it be better?
You had to change your name
On your resume'
Because you sounded too "black" and it worked...

I was sad...

You had to pretend to be a man
Cause people are judgy and that's
a shame
Living in some strange body
Cause you had the software
But the hardware made you feel like a glitch
But I know you as a sassy MF biiissh
Yas queen metaphysical masterpiece
Two people in one head
Metaphorical last but not least
Curtain time
One body that is metamorphic
Jazz and sexuality too many rings
Ebonics and conceptualization
Femine energy castrating the masculine
Sincerest and topical spiritual beast
They/ them curtsey salute
Live your full self and hide ******* nothing
I want to encourage you
To be your own everything!!
Vince Aug 2018
Disconnected but available
Alone but one of many
Smiling to those reading my words
Crying this side of the shiny screen

Feeds scrolling in front of our eyes
Organised randomness of peoples lives
Vague questions, happy memories and sad ones
Others trying to connect, to matter, to belong

We show only what we want seen
As if being held by viewers to some higher standard
Afraid to express our true selves
In fear of losing a friend we have never met

Logging out after farewells to those in foreign lands
The monitors glow extinguished
Days meld, loneliness is back
Waking on a new day that mirrors the last

Clicking a button a fan spins
The glow reignites the software boots
The browser loads, the friends appear
Its just another day, another year.
Mary McCray Apr 17
(NaPoWriMo Challenge: April 17, 2019)

I see lots of ******* and armpits
and double chins
as a computer keyboard.
I am literally a tool
but the best kind.
I see the monitors too.
I know all the logins
in a very intimate way.
I’m a tactile person:
I know what you had for lunch.
And I’ve seen all the software apps
come and go, come and go.

All those logins, all their required tasks
just to get up and running.
I never see goals, strategy or time
used well for all the configuring,
for all the upgradings, new releases,
improvements that take so much effort to learn.

All the shiny new tools
with their compelling backgrounds
and addictive interactions,
they all pile up to a heap of work
to do before you get to important things.
And the more tools you have,
the slower you go: time to load,
debug, and forget that they never
completely do what you need them to do.
They never play nice with all the other tools.

They’re all just shovels
digging a hole.
They’re just hammers
putting up imaginary things.
They’re like those old silver, swinging *****;
they help you avoid thinking about hard work.

But not me. I get words out like nobody’s business.
I’m a real genius.
Prompt: write a poem from an unusual POV.
Solitude Man Nov 2018
An impenetrable shield, but yet a glass-door for easily accessing and surfing the web, without the constant intrution of aggressive ads, trackers or the disturbance of privacy; This is AdGuard! The most enhanced ad blocker in the market.

How does it Work:
Not only does it seemlessly prevent intrusive Ads that slow down browser function and consume loads of data which generally diminishes browsing experience, It also blocks pop-ups, detects and prevents the worm hole of malicious websites and in app Ads. Most of all, it has a continuous filtering process which happens in the background. This means it functions in an unnoticeable and non-intrusive way to give you instant access to clean web pages on the go. Not even the constant banners  from videos will interfere with your browsing. It also gives the option to stop web pages from accessing your social media accounts.    

I stumbled on this app during my search, prior  I have used various ad blockers which either only block a few Ads, and still require an additional extension to block trackers or analytics that spy on private data. I think the most fascinating feature is that, it performs all these functions and does not in any way slow down the proper and smooth functioning of my browser or device. For this I commend the makers on an inimitable software.

Device Availability:
This software is available in Pc/Mac version and also for Android and iPhone.

Access:
This Software is available to download for free and comes with a 14day trial period and a huge possibility to get free activation.

Personally, i believe it is truly worth it and for all my poets out there who just wanna listen to their spoken words in peace, or watch our movies! This is really the app. To be honest, the app is really that good that, I believe if you having troubles with intrusive Ads or getting worried about your privacy, phishing and fraud, best believe this is the best Ad blocker in the market.

-Ola Bajo
Eric W Dec 2018
This has been an interesting year for me.
I left 2017 in a depression,
it followed on into 2018.

I completed a year's worth of coursework
for my Master’s degree.
“Master’s of Science in Software Engineering
with a concentration in Cybersecurity
and Project Management."
What a ****** mouthful.

I started a new job -
one I enjoy coming to every day,
one where I'm never the smartest person
in the room.
I get to learn so much every day.
One where I can grow and
take on responsibility.

I took a leap of faith -
made my first investment
and bought a house.

Shortly after, I took some responsibility
for something other than myself
and got a dog.

I stopped underestimating how important
people are in my life.
I repaired some broken relationships
and nurtured some existing ones.

I went through a severe bout of depression.
I found myself drinking daily,
found myself on my knees in my driveway
pleading to God,
asking why and how.
Sometimes all you have to do is ask the question.

I found myself in a state of uncaring -
completely apathetic as to whether I should live or die,
suicidal,
with my gun calling my name, whispering,
growing louder with each drink.
In a drunken daze, completely broken
and defeated,
I admitted to one of my best friends how
close I'd come,
how tempted I'd been.
She took my gun off my hands,
in keeping with a promise we'd made to each other long ago.

I have not drank since,
nor will I ever drink again.

In these darkening hours is when
I found my faith in God,
something that seemed to be there
all along,
yet was something I couldn't admit
to myself.

I met the love of my life -
something I've never been so certain of -
and it's opened up possibilities
I had only dreamed of.
Someone that there's a future with,
that chooses to grow, to flourish,
and to love.

Certainly life has more challenges in store,
the struggle, the suffering, is never-ending,
and sometimes it's all we can do to
stay above water.

This year has been one of absolute transformation,
and this December looks entirely different
than the last.
Not really a poem, just a reflection to a question that was asked.
Jude kyrie Dec 2018
Neither one of them knew when the rivalry began.
It was certainly in their infancy.
Rachel Huntington was twenty
a star scholar at Oxford university.
Matthew fotheringham was the same age
also a star scholar  
They excelled in the study of English literature
having read all of the aincent and modern classics in high school.
It was known that saint Hilda's college at Oxford
regarded Rachel as  the most  gifted student
they had seen for years.
In his group the same was said for Matthew.

They shared the same advanced literature class
and the tension between then was palatable.
She would put forward a proposition
on Shakespeare repeated usage of
Iambic pentameter.
And Matthew would destroy her concept
with a detailed analysis of his works.

Have you been  cribbing with Cole's notes
he would add in disdain.
Rebecca hated him
calling him insufferably conceited and a total buffoon.

He once went to her dorm
to pick up an ancient script
she had borrowed from the library , the only copy.
He phoned from the hall
shall I come up to your room
And pick it up.
Rachel shouted No!
I will bring it down to you.
You are never to come up to my dorm.
It's not that I wouldn't allow a man up here
But if anyone were to see you leaving
and got the wrong idea.
I don't want them to think I have no taste
and low standards in boyfriends.
And that's how it went on.

Then the literature guilds competition had been announced
Scholars from all over Europe
were to present their essays of no less than 25 thousand words and the winner would receive 25 thousand guineas
but more importantly that opened the door
to the chairs of literature all through the continent.

The rivalry escalation was at fever pitch.
Matthew worked  75. Hour weeks on his essay
Rachelle kept up with him never wasting a single moment.
The class bookmaker has had narrow odds on the winner it one of these two.

They went to the presentation hall
and entered the book sized essays
sealed in manilla envelopes
Rachel quipped,you don't have a chance,
you couldn't copy mine.
Matthew said,
I hope they don't use the new plagiarism software
you have probably stole yours from the internet.
I already have made plans for my winnings he bragged.
What a good plated pocket protector
and  a girl friend you just add air too.
Matthew was hurt
Particularly at the insult
that he had a blow up plastic girlfriend.
He remembered humor was the best defence
it showed they could not hurt you.
I only bought her for driving
on the diamond lanes on the highway.
Anyhoo nothing happened between us
until that last night of term
When we drank too much wine.
Rachel walked off in disgust
As he yelled so all could here
She's better in bed than you will ever be .

It was two weeks to the announcement of the contest winners.
No use worrying about it Matthew said
He went for a long evening stroll by the river.
As he turned on the river bend he saw Rachel
She was crying say beneath a huge willow tree.

For once he did not have a smart quip or an insult.
He walked to her and sat down next to her.
Why are you weeping ? Rachel he asked gently.
She had never ever heard his voice so soft.
My father died last night. She sobbed.
It occurred to Matthew he knew nothing of her life.
I am so sorry what happened
He was the clergyman at Saint Monica's Anglican Church
He had cancer and never let me know.
It had taken all his savings to get me through Oxford.
And he did not want me to lose focus.
Then she wept freely
Matthew held her close to him she wept on his his shoulder
His fingers gently touched her reddish auburn hair.
It was soft she smelt of lavender soap it was nice.
I ...I have to go to Stow  on the wold, tomorrow for the funeral.
I shall take you there
Do you have a car she asked.
Yes I have a twenty year old MG convertible.
My dad bought me when I got into Oxford.
It was arranged he picked her up
and off to the funeral they went .

He never felt as comfortable
or comforting in all his life.
He was seeing her in a new light
after all the stupid years.
They arrived at the old vicarage
Mrs Evans the housekeeper hugged them both
It's about time you got your pretty nose
out of those old dusty books
And got yourself a boyfriend.
The weird part was neither one of them
corrected Mrs Evans.

The funeral took place
And they set back along the old country roads to the university.
They talked about literature art poets and writers.
Then the old engine conked out.
Miles from anywhere
You need to go get petrol she said.

But there's no station between here and Oxford said Michael.
The phone signal was not reaching them.
We have to sleep in the car for the night.
Rachel said as long as you don't get any ideas.
You are not my type.

He was going to tell her she was his type
but said nothing.
It was freezing in the night Rachel was shivering
He took off his coat and jacket
and put them over her in the back seat
As he shivered frozen in the front seat.

In the early morning they woke up
She stepped out of the car and stretched
Matthew was on one knee in front of her
What are doing she asked?
What does it look like I am doing ?
I am proposing that you become my wife.
Never! never! never !
After all the insults you have laid upon me.
Well I'm I'm sorry he whispered.
Not good enough she shouted.

Do you have the guts to make a bet with me Matthew asked.?
Her reddish hair answered the challenge
Just try me.
OK if I win the award you will become my wife.
If I win then you get lost and marry the blow up lady.she countered.
Well the challenge was a tough one
If she did not accept it it was saying he was smarter than her and she knew it.
If she accepted it was the opposite.
OK you have a deal.

A week later Matthew was working in the library
The prize winners are being posted on the notice board.
He felt a gasp in his chest
As he reached the crowd of students he saw Rachel
She even had a trace of makeup on she was now
Getting to look beautiful to him.
Good luck rachel he whispered I hope you win.
She knew he meant it but she remembered the wager.
She said softly I hope it's you that wins Mathew.
A young woman rushed out of the crowd
Rachelle you won you won.
Mathews heart sank
Congratulations Rachel I am so happy for you.
She felt a tear selling in her eye
Mathew where are you going she said.
You told me to go And marry my send away lady
that you just add air to.
If I lost the bet and you won Rachel.
And her heart sank in her chest.

Then the young woman saw him
Matthew congratulations you won.
She showed him a copy of the winners notice.
It had a note
In all the years of the competition we have never had two such magnificent essays
The adjudicator's were unable to mark one better than the other
We have shared the prize to two winners for the very first time.
Rachel held Mathew close and kissed him fully and hard.
Not caring who was watching.
He kissed her back
The crowd were astonished
their feud was legendary at Oxford.


Two years later.

Matthew strolled in the park with the twins
and his beloved wife Rachel.
She had married him
a week after the award ceremony at Oxford.
It was said in the coffee room that the university
had never had two professors
as much in love as them
they were now both  teaching in the English department
and we're already in competition for their tenure.
But they never spent a moment appart.

He picked up the twins
and shouted his love for Rachel
on the top of his voice.
The evening breeze picked up the perfume
of the fallen leaves.
Rachel smiled at him
and whispered softly
I love you too dearest.

She felt him slip into that private room in her heart
that she always saved for her soulmate
As he entered the room holding their two babies.
She locked the door behind him
with the only key that existed.
And then she threw it
into the dense woodlands of Oxfordshire
Never to found again.
Opposites yet so alike .
The best kind of connection.
Jude
Here I am,
In the Madness of My Mind.

Out my nut,
Off my rocker.

They have pumped me full,
I’m filled with diverse drugs,
Enough to make owls dull,
So serpents start to shrug.

Now the darkness takes me,
But just before it can,
I’ll share with you a story,
Of being a madman.

So sit down and take a seat,
I speak of madness hard to treat.

It started in the morning,
It could have been the evening,
No true idea of when or where,
Not really for a week.

I couldn’t sleep for trying,
No matter what was off then,
I tried for comfort laying,
But new madness took me often.

Sleepless nights for evenings,
Somewhat losing weakened wits,
And What’s with these illusions,
Passing by my front in flits,
Are they even visions,
The truth is hard to know,
My mind was filled with madness,
So insane I had to go.

Must get out of here I thought,
Before I lose my mind,
Before the devil comes for me,
To take my soul in kind,
If I somehow get away,
May he leave me well alone,
I know too well that if I stay,
His hell will be my home.

Must try to flee I thought,
From masked men in the air,
Being careful to avoid,
Demon shadows in my stair.

Is that a ufo I see,
Its government that’s after me,
Will they take me up for probing,
Whisk me off in car for nabbing.

What could such desire for me,
Perhaps it’s Satans plan,
By now they are the Devils men,
Satan is the man,
But no matter of how many men,
Whoever is the man,
I am far too quick for them,
So catch me if you can,
The devils in the details,
And I am fast as ****,
You cannot catch me Satan,
I’m afraid your out of luck.

I heard it in a song once,
I knew what they would do,
If they ever were to catch me,
Off to rooms without a view.

They would tie me to a chair,
Having metal straps and harness,
They’d try ripping me in pairs,
As evil gawps in glee with tortuous.

While keeping me alive,
They’d mark me with the beast,
While beasting with two backs,
They’d face my west into its east,
Still conscious they would torture,
They’d never let me go,
Stuck they’d keep me sore forever,
Jury in the know.

So quickly I must run,
I must be gone before they come,
But who is he who waves at one,
I’ll see before he comes.

That’s you I see there Satan,
Why the offer here for shoes,
I do not think I’ll wear them,
As to hell they drag in two’s.

So I’ll take my shoes and toss them,
Straight in to the nearest bin,
I’ll prepare for my long journey,
With the dogs im faithful in,
Some food to last them down the street,
For me just twenty Quid,
No shoes or socks to clothe my feet,
I’d better remain hid.

Now where is it I go,
The beach on to the sea,
Then it’s to the forth road,
Time to travel there for me.

My feet did start to hurt now,
I’ve been walking for a while,
Not slyly as the fox now,
Was receiving many scowls,
My beard is long and shaggy,
My clothes are worn and tore,
Folk cant have seen a man like me,
That many times before.

Why’s a youtube sign,
Oddly sat in someone’s garden,
Is this a simulation,
Was I silt in software hardened,
What if I catch a virus,
What if someone pulls the plug,
Will all then be in darkness,
Or will hell give me a hug.

Now im getting hungry here,
I thought it’s time for tea,
Is the café over there,
A calling out to me,
Water with a sandwich billed,
Was feeling quite deranged,
Are these odd people cannibals,
My dogs are acting strange,
Perhaps they want to eat me,
If so I have to go,
A stomach wont be good for me,
It’s time for me to bolt.

Soon I met a jolly man,
Irish with red hair,
He laughed and joked of tiredness,
From buggering the air,
Perhaps he was just civil,
But to me its plain to see,
This man he was the devil,
And he wants to ****** me.

One more kind man it was I met,
Or the devil in his form,
He offered me a little tent,
To keep me nice and warm,
Some shoes he gave for my feet cracked,
I had to give them back,
Declined his offer and his hat,
Wont sell my soul for that.

Police have caught me now,
Even though I tried to bust them,
The look they gave each other,
Said I really shouldn’t trust them,
Is this the car to courthouse,
Or is this the road to hell,
Will they try to crash the car,
And drag me straight to hell.

To the hospital im going,
For mad and mental both,
In waiting room im strolling,
Cold and scared of all the oafs,
They soon return with words for me,
Fallen angels as I thought,
They say the warm room now is free,
So that is where we ought,
I knew exactly what this means,
No way in heck that’s happening,
I’ll fight you off with warlike screams,
And force the exits opening.

I struggled strongly in my fright,
I put up quite a fight,
They couldn’t pull me through the door,
They called for backup more,
Four male nurses jumped on me,
My strength you should have seen,
Not with ten more men I said ,
You’re never taking me.

My courage was not want,
But endurance I did lack,
They wrestled without daunt,
Until I fell upon my back,
They gave me an injection,
Stuck it right into my ***,
My thoughts were soon reflection,
As my consciousness would pass.

They took me to a room,
They placed me on a bed,
There wasn’t much in headroom,
For to place my tired head,
The nurses face was purply,
Most of it was red,
Perhaps it’s hell already,
Perhaps I’m really dead.

So that’s the tale my story,
Should you wonder if its bad,
I can tell you its a worry,
When you are completely mad,
So remember in the night,
When you start to feel unhappy,
At least its not a nightmare,
Not delusions with insanity.

So serpents start to shrug,
Enough to make owls dull,
I’m filled with diverse drugs,
They have pumped me full.

Off my rocker,
Out my nut.

In the Madness of My Mind,
Here I am.

Written by Barry J. Thomson.
This poem is a glimpse inside the mind of someone suffering episodes of mental illness, like schizophrenia or ******-affective disorder.
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