Barry’s dead.

I saw you dying weeks ago;
An oyster shell turned empty can,
Scrumpled up and finished
By the past’s magnet attraction
In your shakey hands.
It’s just a habit now and you can hardly kick yourself.

Buckets of Grolsch:
My swash-buckling hero
Turned slosh-slurping zero once again
And shiny surfaces
Never suited you.

Scrub away at that black demon matter
With the sole white spirit
Your genius affords. A shattered socialist
Posy primrose ******;
That’s the story of your life –
All
      most
               man.

Now beneath the cowslips
And the heifer’s hooves,
Your saintly-thorny words without a roof:
But who will speak for you?
And trawl the depths
As you once did in youth?
Prizing open oysters…

I hope that where you are
Your silence brings relief.
I hope that where you are
You smell the borage breeze.
I hope that where you are
There’s ox-cheek for tea
And your carbonated past
Is carbonating in mute peace.

Tonight the argent stars
Are dulled in disbelief
Tonight the slate that you’ve carved
Is the hardest you will teach.
Tonight the tumblestones
Are falling down in grief:

For Barry’s gone to rediscover Pearl
And the beauty of her peace.

pencil
slithering      along paper
projecting a negative
spilling with meaning
enduring
the human condition
coiled abstracted
killing
the beekeepers  daughter
dimming
with every other mistake
just another
scrumpled piece of paper
census taker
wet
with excitement
cabinets, pills, waste
a false flag
fundamental
our angels of materialism
cue commercials
peasants whim
never finding
the key to expression

You're such an awesome little cat
Your life started with "I am not disposable"
The most heart wrenching sight to behold
A tiny black scrumpled up mess
You're now our loved "Scrawny black rat"
You don't like to be held
About a minute is your limit
Then your sweet tone ... mmmmmmhhh
Not happy you grimace
So I put you down
I will never traumatise you
Just build a cool world around you
I love it at my meal time
You jump up in my face
You just can't help yourself
You have to investigate
And taste .. and what do I do
I let you cause you make me melt
Still small with the heart of a lion
I'm so glad we saved you

How was your trip? I hope you enjoyed it
Did you stay up all night? Or wanted to die? I did
The sun has made your skin glow
And it's just made my scars show
Again

The blade I used to carve out bark on the trees
Has now made marks on my sleeve
You see I'm too scared to leave now
So I'll just let my wrists bleed out
And hope they won't find me

I wrote your name on my arm
With a lump in my throat
I wrote 'I'm sorry, forever' on a scrumpled up note
Grabbed the stool from the kitchen and placed my head through the knot  and write before I leaned towards the rain
Your text read out 'stop'

I didn't want a life without you
I must be in heaven because now I only see you