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"rehab" poems
Seven shots with ****** knuckles, four bottles of letting everyone down, Eight hits from a disappointing life. It only took me one trip to the rehab center called your touch. I used the medicine of your love to become sober. now I am dependent on you, I need you every day and do not feel the same without you. I have an itch when I'm away and a warmth when I'm close. I became addicted to your love. twelve tabs of compassion, three pints of self-worth, five pills of your warm embrace, And one injection of beautiful passion. I want you... I need you... I have you. I love you.
0
Jan 27, 2017
Jan 27, 2017 at 1:41 PM UTC
Newly Sober.
midnight skin blanketing ******* toned hips a warm tongue points; this the taste of ecstasy on my fingertips taunts the rehab in my touch yearning to risk it pills litter stone-wood floors as we **** through flaws **** feelings carpet the inner raw** moaning and creaking of hard wood boards wild moods bodies wet clinging sensual monsoon fiending for a fixing we cut through bleeding lust ****** sheets whispering drops of crimson truth as familiar sensations pulsate we gyrate losing focus of whose waist hanging onto **** don’t wait
0
Jul 16, 2014
Jul 16, 2014 at 4:11 PM UTC
******
Nobody chooses a bottle willingly. A pill or a loaded gun, in the end it's all the same. We're waiting, still, hiding. In our holiest of places: The kitchen and the office. A quiet sideways-slide into the last available stall in a casino washroom. The seat is still warm. Teachers don't tell kids that drugs are bad. They told us that we were the evil ones for deep-throating a bottle of ***** every Friday. They didn't know what we had to go home to. Cancer sounded better than living past 20, and that's the thing that they'll never comprehend: There's always a reason underneath overdose. The only time a drug is bad is when you can't afford it, and you're sitting alone in a fetal position crying in need for a chemical bliss that you've caressed over and over; a blanket covering memories. Feelings. Emotions. The only time a drug is bad is when you're too **** poor to grab anything better than a box of Benadryl and a dimebag of shake. The only time a drug is bad is when you're anything but rich an' white and pretty, because then you're not addicted, you're having fun with the price of 1,000 a week at an all-inclusive rehab resort. Drugs don't discriminate, but people sure as Hell do. There's always a reason underneath overdose. There's always a reason underneath. There's always a reason.
0
Sep 18, 2018
Sep 18, 2018 at 1:15 PM UTC
Under the Overdose
Alcoholism took my father away from me. I watched him destroy his life from the age of five. When Austin left us- I watched his life shatter completely. I started to plink away on the piano. Then he started to pick up the pieces. He got his life together, remarried, and is trying to repay a lost childhood. So I continue to play. Now, I'm watching both my sister's life come to crumbles at the lips of a bottle. So I play louder. One has gone to rehab for drugs and alcohol. She is getting better- back on her feet. The other has moved out and cut off communication with our Father. So I keep playing. I'll write a sonng or two for you- and I'll wait for you to come home. All I've ever known alcohol to do- is destroy. And people wonder why the smell nauseates me..
0
Jun 16, 2014
Jun 16, 2014 at 12:02 AM UTC
Alcohol
iN & Out Of Rehab        iRelapse Then Collapse iNever         Commited To Sober Living So Why Are People Tripping?      Drug Programs Are A Waste According To My Case.         im Never  Going to Stop  unless i O.D And Drop But Even iN Heaven Thats iF iRise.             With the Angel imma Continue Tweaking Cause iM A ****** Tweaker      Or iN Hell With Fallen Angels. It'll Be Better,        Since iSold My Soul To The Devil. He Never Asked iJust Gave iT Up. iFell iN Love With A stimulant Drug made up Of Chemicals ****** Poison But idgaf il Keep Dosing.    Went From Snorting To Smoking     Methamphetamine iLet iT Get The Best Of Me. Part 2 Out & iN 2014 iTs Krazie iM Back To This Dope **** Its been Already 4 years and Im still Addicted. In & Out Of Rehabs, Different Drug Programs and Sad That iStill Havnt learned **** Got Out November 19 2014 For The 3rd Time And im Still Twisting, Getting Lit Ilove Living Twisted Im on a comedown Im irrated right now wanting to take Another hit.
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Sep 6, 2014
Sep 6, 2014 at 2:21 PM UTC
iN & Out Of Rehab
Hey everyone, I wanted you all to know That I went to rehab No, not drug rehab ****** addiction rehab Much more...I don't know, Abnormal? I want you to know this Because I love you And I don't care What kind of **** you've been through Or how ****** up you are I am too I've been close to a lot And I'm sure if I knew your whole, I would love you the same, If not even more Because vulnerability is beautiful Wear your heart inside out You won't scare me And if you scare someone else, well, Now you know who they are
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Nov 6, 2014
Nov 6, 2014 at 8:04 PM UTC
Vulnerability
Sunday: Ant Pills Bear Traps Cobra Feet Monday: Dolphin Lungs Eel Soup Frog Limbs Tuesday: Gecko Suits Horse Pie Inchworm *** Wednesday: Jaguar Barbed Koala Beer Lynx Lynch Thursday: Monkey Chips Narwhal Fashions Otter Drugs Friday: Porcupine Rehab Quail Map Roadrunner Piano Saturday: Slug Party Turkey Slop Urchin See Sunday: Vulture Guns Walrus Tongues X No Monday: Yellowjacket Fever Zebra Clowns
0
Oct 4, 2010
Oct 4, 2010 at 9:08 PM UTC
Jeff Corwin Teaches Lindsay Lohan the ABCs
***is there a rehab for self-hatred? because i don't fall into drugs. i fall back into hating myself.***
0
Feb 15, 2015
Feb 15, 2015 at 11:14 AM UTC
rehab for hatred
He looks like a rasta Preaches no money only peace But smokes no **** He’s been sober all his life Like he just got out of rehab But doesn't mind if his friends smoke a couple trees He breaks it down like a b-boy That might of known Michael Jackson Then belts out American country music In the heart of Africa Designs fashion making Europeans wonder If they should colonize Africa again to get his resources. Neo-colonization anyone? He has small money He lives poor But lives rich Has his own humble home Like the adult he’s been since 15 And loves helplessly like he’s still 15 Despite the bruises the world continues to lash on his never aging soul. Ohhh Those bruises must hurt But he’s trying to heal them with his art He is an anomaly Doesn’t fit here or there But anomalies are perfectly normal They choose to sit in there soul Release truth that needs to be told Because it’s only natural Not fabricated The fabricated Really hates it. The fabricated Still takes a taste of it Because they want that Freedom The fabricated Watch in awe They say no You aren’t allowed to do that That’s a contradiction You’re a paradox Social lines wont let you cross that. Get back in line Get back in line Before we shoot you Because we want your freedom too. He’s been shot a couple times I think his soul is his armor But he lives in a human body So you can imagine he’s not all that bullet proof. Even if his body dies one day I swear his soul will live on. His freedom has no expiration date.
0
Jul 3, 2016
Jul 3, 2016 at 3:41 AM UTC
You're a contradiction
He looks like a rasta Preaches no money only peace But smokes no **** He’s been sober all his life Like he just got out of rehab But doesn't mind if his friends smoke a couple trees He breaks it down like a b-boy That might of known Michael Jackson Then belts out American country music In the heart of Africa Designs fashion making Europeans wonder If they should colonize Africa again to get his resources. Neo-colonization anyone? He has small money He lives poor But lives rich Has his own humble home Like the adult he’s been since 15 And loves helplessly like he’s still 15 Despite the bruises the world continues to lash on his never aging soul. Ohhh Those bruises must hurt But he’s trying to heal them with his art He is an anomaly Doesn’t fit here or there But anomalies are perfectly normal They choose to sit in there soul Release truth that needs to be told Because it’s only natural Not fabricated The fabricated Really hates it. The fabricated Still takes a taste of it Because they want that Freedom The fabricated Watch in awe They say no You aren’t allowed to do that That’s a contradiction You’re a paradox Social lines wont let you cross that. Get back in line Get back in line Before we shoot you Because we want your freedom too. He’s been shot a couple times I think his soul is his armor But he lives in a human body So you can imagine he’s not all that bullet proof. Even if his body dies one day I swear his soul will live on. His freedom has no expiration date.
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54
What if I told you I want to die? That I'm tired of living, of being alive? What if I said it gets worse at night? The thoughts get louder and everything seems wrong What if I told you I lied when I said I was fine? When I said I'm fine, how are you, I was actually crying on the inside. What if I lied and said everything is alright No, I'm not crying, I swear I'm fine. What if I tried to take my life? Would you send me to rehab? Hoping the doctors would fix me, and everything would be fine? What if I told you hope is dumb? That hope is a stupid thing to have Because when I have hope, everything falls apart. What if I told you I lied, again, when I said I was better? That I only said that so you wouldn't worry? Well, I did. What if I said to you, I've hated myself since the age of 9? That I wish you could've helped, before it was too late? What if I succeeded in killing myself? I doubt anyone would cry. Would you even care, If I took my own life?
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Apr 16, 2017
Apr 16, 2017 at 11:07 PM UTC
What if I told you?
I need rehab from you, and I’m sorry but this isn’t healthy. Admitting being a problem is sobering And I hope you can recover from my withdrawal. I’ll be busy detoxing myself, For everyone after you. But mostly for myself. I hope you remember how great you are!! As I try to forget all the poison you gave me I'll be cheering you on from a far!! & revising the scripts I tell myself So that one day I'll stop playing the role You put me in And I'll start living For myself again
0
Jan 30, 2019
Jan 30, 2019 at 12:04 AM UTC
Refuse to be Used
Drug Addict I drink beer, I drink liquor, doing shots makes it quicker. I smoke a bowl, I smoke a joint, is there a problem, get to the point. I take acid, I like trip, I love the trail of a moving whip. I like ****** sugar, I snort coke, no wonder, I'm so **** broke. I pop pills for stress, some for pain, you'll never hear me complain. I shoot ****** then I dose off, my life is just a total loss. I make and smoke **** hoping it takes my last breath. Special K is my favorite tranquilizer, I use it as a drug appetizer. I smoke crack, don't ask why, don't knock it, til you try. Ecstasy makes me feel so good, it always puts me in a special mood. I sniff gas, I sniff glue, then I ask, who are you. Sometimes I smoke hash, I live a life of white trash. Morphine can't be beat, my brain has suffered a defeat. I even take ****** and steroids, ***** big, ***** small and I'm paranoid. Been to counselling, been to rehab, last time I went, I ended up with ***** Now finally, I'm clean and sober, been that way since mid October. I admit drugs are more fun, but in the end, God finally won.
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Jan 11, 2014
Jan 11, 2014 at 2:56 PM UTC
Drug Addict
Machine ground days Somehow survived by clinging to precarious plans Die for those. For proles are stuck in a televised gleam but I’m barred from distractions I’m a man of action Spring healing: I found a new hope to get through the day It has a name and it’s you Workday: animistic curses against people and their systems and products except animals would escape forever as soon as they open the cage but we stay The beastly gnashings of overworked merchandisers for invisible self pocket stuffers The competition's getting to us, comrades I feel swindled out of my labor I was pregnant but they sold my child before I woke up Addressing the solipsism of my rehab circle: I’m Kagey, and my life is hazy but, blunted or no, let’s get this clear: don’t trust your senses and that goes for all my human peers Body is a cage full of defenses Still, I’m suspicious of reality whether it’s façade society or the wooden chair in front of me Still, I enjoy the virtual scenery I ain’t talking about on the T.V. or phone screen I mean the willows, buildings, and faces But all these mushy green acres are fakers blobs without our eyesight Still tho, me and the universe are tight.
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Sep 2, 2014
Sep 2, 2014 at 8:00 AM UTC
Cashier Writings on Receipt Paper
**** head, struggling for breath Final hit, before the red Light flashes, warning to stop Over dose, **** the innards She never chose to lose this Battle, between herself & it Where'd she go, lost in space Chasing herself, a dog with his tail Praying to an above, to lead her Straight laced, not swerving off track Please God save me, her last plea Before another day dawns, her final wish Sketcher, tweaker, where's that syringe The lights too bright, reality a curse Rolled up in rehab, another ghetto kid Not this girl, high class, white, moneyed Lost to the night, speed freak, hopeless Drowning in addiction, using again Chemical structures defining her fate Her brain the game Disfigured face, unrecognizable eyes Family love, isn't ever enough Rushed to ER, another broken soul Promises that drugs will save her When only she can ever Save herself This time, she's not another life Lost The Gods sure blessed her, not with Her wish So she's packaged off to rehab The third times a charm, right? © Sia Jane
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Nov 14, 2013
Nov 14, 2013 at 3:11 PM UTC
Rehab
Evil & crime so predictable & stale. Stupid how arrested suspects get bail. Convicted when their victims tell. Prison is where some stay & are jailed. They have to communicate by mail. Sometimes their focus goes in another direction. Where probation happens after correction. Child & spousal abuse, drug use, & rehab that is no use. History repeats Wives & children still get beat. Their isn't always a Superman or Batman to be your hero. With a sword or crossbow. Details of armed robbery , drug dealing & smuggling. Stabbings & muggings. On the inside homosexual love with cuddling. Human trafficking & prostitution. Violating amendments & constitutions. They are how they are from how they were raised. If their victims could speak from the grave Or had they been saved. They could explain & describe how their rapists & killers behaved. Male & females do their time. Years in custody for their crimes. Seriousness of their offenses vary. Some educate, get jobs, or marry. Behind bars is where violence belongs. To be punished for all that they did wrong. Some from death row are now dead. Similar to the wildlife in a zoo behind bars they get fed.
0
Feb 8, 2015
Feb 8, 2015 at 11:11 PM UTC
Darkness Prevails
iNever Been iN A Relationship With A Human Being. Only With My Drug, Crystal **** IConsidered iT My Lover. My Baby, My World My Everything. iFell inlove With A Substance, Felt So Real. Created A Strong Bond That Seemed unbreakable We Were unseperable. This Stimulant Kept Me Away From Reality And Everything in it. Blocked Me From Having An Actual Boyfriend and Catching True Loving Feeling. iWas Blinded By These False Euphoric Feelings. A Rush Like iF ive Accomplished A Hundred Things. iWas Concentrated And Focused On Getting High And Just living The Addict life. That iHad No intrest At 16 Towards Boys or having a love life. My Mind Was Just Set On The Streets And Dope Game, Riskful Missions And Hanging With Friends. Guys Would Holler, But id Give No interest. Just Me And My Drug iS All That Mattered. Throughout My 3rd Time iN Rehab, My Neighbor Would Call. A Guy Friend. Daily Conversations, Laughs And giggls,  something so rare and unexperienced. As iBegan To Recover & Emotions Started To Untie, iBegan To Feel Some Strange feelings ive never experienced 1st hand. Once iGraduated My program. We Communicated More, I liked This, i liked him. Was Hard To believe that after all he knew about me? He was into me to. My supporter, My Friend This Guy Became My 1st Boyfriend <3 041314
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Sep 19, 2014
Sep 19, 2014 at 9:52 AM UTC
Boyfriend
Oh, what a horrible night Definitely not late December back in '63 These are the Frankie valleys of my days Night is always black Night always comes back Night envelopes us in the abyss And makes us cherish light Heightening our senses To help us handle the unknown When my days are filled with stimulation The stillness of night sinks me Into quicksand mixed by The current of my mind Overflowing into the sands of time And reminds me Of the stillness of my eyes locked on you Or the stillness of my actions as you walk by Or the stillness of my heart when you call me a ****** My frustration boiled Night's black tar So I bottled it up Placed it in a syringe And medicated my love with darkness I worked my first job at the local Kroger's People would leave with everything they wanted And I'd push their empty carts back into the store The artificial lights of the street lamps Lacked warmth Their hypnotic buzz highlighted The stillness of night Making me wonder if there was any way I could be happy Similar to when activity would die down in rehab A pitiful wretch left to his faculties I'd stare out the window Into the concrete chasm And wonder if happiness could be found by someone like me Night continues Night confines Day comes And goes Night returns Night reburns Night relearned I really hate to see the day come to an end It'd be alright if I was on the bay with a pen But I live near sulfur vents Inside a searing tent Where the hellacious temperature rises rapidly Despite the absence of the sun's warmth The hellfire of night Reminisces of those I have thoroughly failed And my overwhelming remorse As I stare out my window Into the bramble ravine I wonder about the possibility of contentment The stillness of night answers me But at least now I can open the door And charge into the night headstrong To search frantically For someone who Erases my history And writes my future And makes me wonder if I could ever be happier
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Jul 11, 2017
Jul 11, 2017 at 4:13 AM UTC
Night
Oh, what a horrible night Definitely not late December back in '63 These are the Frankie valleys of my days Night is always black Night always comes back Night envelopes us in the abyss And makes us cherish light Heightening our senses To help us handle the unknown When my days are filled with stimulation The stillness of night sinks me Into quicksand mixed by The current of my mind Overflowing into the sands of time And reminds me Of the stillness of my eyes locked on you Or the stillness of my actions as you walk by Or the stillness of my heart when you call me a ****** My frustration boiled Night's black tar So I bottled it up Placed it in a syringe And medicated my love with darkness I worked my first job at the local Kroger's People would leave with everything they wanted And I'd push their empty carts back into the store The artificial lights of the street lamps Lacked warmth Their hypnotic buzz highlighted The stillness of night Making me wonder if there was any way I could be happy Similar to when activity would die down in rehab A pitiful wretch left to his faculties I'd stare out the window Into the concrete chasm And wonder if happiness could be found by someone like me Night continues Night confines Day comes And goes Night returns Night reburns Night relearned I really hate to see the day come to an end It'd be alright if I was on the bay with a pen But I live near sulfur vents Inside a searing tent Where the hellacious temperature rises rapidly Despite the absence of the sun's warmth The hellfire of night Reminisces of those I have thoroughly failed And my overwhelming remorse As I stare out my window Into the bramble ravine I wonder about the possibility of contentment The stillness of night answers me But at least now I can open the door And charge into the night headstrong To search frantically For someone who Erases my history And writes my future And makes me wonder if I could ever be happier
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64
It's hard to fall in love again Because after all that I've been through I very strongly believe that the only ones who can ever truly love you back Are your parents and your dog It's hard to fall in love again Because I was born and brought up in a culture which said that all that matters is the outside And the inside can just go **** off It's hard to fall in love again Because it is shown that being fair is the only way you can be lovely That all matrimonials ever wanted was a slim and b'ful lady If this was an MCQ, I'll be the none of these It's hard to fall in love again Because I'm scared all men just want the body with curves and face like an angel That the only things that should be big are your **** and your *** Because who gives a **** about a big heart It's hard to fall in love again Because the words that he said in the past still haunt me, telling me that I'm not good enough Pretty enough, **** enough, anything enough to be loved It's hard to fall in love again Because eventhough I read quotes on how beauty comes from within, it's proved wrong with every single encounter Which leads to be believe that all that movies and books ever taught us about romance is absolute ******** That the only reason Jack ever loved Rose was because, well, she was ******* hot It's hard to fall in love again Because people don't see that you're born with the skin but it takes effort to build the soul Because the skin will form wrinkles and sag with time But the soul and the mind won't It's hard to fall in love again Because I don't want to add more to my list of insecurities and brokenness which scar me forever Because I don't want to dive down and down and down into my worn out self esteem It's so ******* hard to fall in love again So I laugh it off and joke around But everytime I see you I really, really want to fall in love again But I'm scared that you'll do the same and break whatever is left of me That you'll turn me inside out and rub my imperfections till they burn That you'll laugh with your friends and say Where did that ***** even gather the guts from to come up to me and say, "Hey man, I like you" Like that's the worst thing anyone could ever say to you? They say Love is a drug But I think I'm in rehab They say Don't be cynical about love because in the face of all aridity and disenchantment It is as perennial as the grass But I think I'm better off in a barren land A place that can accept me for who I am So the next time you ask, "Are you dating someone?" And I reply with a snort and say, "Huh, look at me. No one would want to be with me." And you say, "No, looks don't matter and the personality-" I'll punch you in the ******* face Because to hell with all your crap You won't want to be me even for a single day You won't want to be the ugly girl standing in the corner of the hallway
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Oct 15, 2017
Oct 15, 2017 at 7:03 AM UTC
Confessions of an ugly girl
It's hard to fall in love again Because after all that I've been through I very strongly believe that the only ones who can ever truly love you back Are your parents and your dog It's hard to fall in love again Because I was born and brought up in a culture which said that all that matters is the outside And the inside can just go **** off It's hard to fall in love again Because it is shown that being fair is the only way you can be lovely That all matrimonials ever wanted was a slim and b'ful lady If this was an MCQ, I'll be the none of these It's hard to fall in love again Because I'm scared all men just want the body with curves and face like an angel That the only things that should be big are your **** and your *** Because who gives a **** about a big heart It's hard to fall in love again Because the words that he said in the past still haunt me, telling me that I'm not good enough Pretty enough, **** enough, anything enough to be loved It's hard to fall in love again Because eventhough I read quotes on how beauty comes from within, it's proved wrong with every single encounter Which leads to be believe that all that movies and books ever taught us about romance is absolute ******** That the only reason Jack ever loved Rose was because, well, she was ******* hot It's hard to fall in love again Because people don't see that you're born with the skin but it takes effort to build the soul Because the skin will form wrinkles and sag with time But the soul and the mind won't It's hard to fall in love again Because I don't want to add more to my list of insecurities and brokenness which scar me forever Because I don't want to dive down and down and down into my worn out self esteem It's so ******* hard to fall in love again So I laugh it off and joke around But everytime I see you I really, really want to fall in love again But I'm scared that you'll do the same and break whatever is left of me That you'll turn me inside out and rub my imperfections till they burn That you'll laugh with your friends and say Where did that ***** even gather the guts from to come up to me and say, "Hey man, I like you" Like that's the worst thing anyone could ever say to you? They say Love is a drug But I think I'm in rehab They say Don't be cynical about love because in the face of all aridity and disenchantment It is as perennial as the grass But I think I'm better off in a barren land A place that can accept me for who I am So the next time you ask, "Are you dating someone?" And I reply with a snort and say, "Huh, look at me. No one would want to be with me." And you say, "No, looks don't matter and the personality-" I'll punch you in the ******* face Because to hell with all your crap You won't want to be me even for a single day You won't want to be the ugly girl standing in the corner of the hallway
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54
A person like you should never have to go through what you have No one deserves it, but especially someone like you. I talked to you for 15 minutes and by the 8th minute I had tears rolling down my cheeks and my heart pulsated so sharply I thought I could see it through my shirt God, why. Mom. Cancer. Rehab. Chain. ******* Smoker. Depression. Anxiety. Body dysmorphia. God, I am so sorry.   All the cliches in the entire world could not amount to the things I wish I could say to you, and one day make you believe. All the times you saved me from my worst self, only to realize that while you had saved me, it was your own self that was delving deeper and deeper into its own defeat. God. Every time you would come up and give me a hug even when I barely knew you. When I had no idea what you would mean to me, and how much your life would impact mine. I am so sorry. Sorry that your parent's were **** to you. That you didn't get the family you deserve, but made yourself such a strong, completely marvelous person. I'm not romanticising any of the things you went through because I would never shed a good light on things that caused you so much suffering. No, that's not it at all. All the stories you told me tonight seemed too unbearable to be real. But those stories are your harsh realities and I would trade everything I owned, all the money in my bank account, for you to stop what you do to yourself and the undo the numbness you've trained yourself to feel you are NOT sad personified you are NOT just *** appeal and sweet heartbreaker you even know that my heart breaks, literally I can feel it, when you tell me, show me, paint ******* pictures for me of all the things you've dragged yourself through I can't pick your feet up and carry you through, though. God, how I wish I could. You have to do it on your own, I know you can. But I just ******* hope you'll follow through in your terrifying, mystifyingly horrible promise of, "Maybe I'll stick around until then" . . .
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Sep 4, 2013
Sep 4, 2013 at 11:53 PM UTC
sad personified
A person like you should never have to go through what you have No one deserves it, but especially someone like you. I talked to you for 15 minutes and by the 8th minute I had tears rolling down my cheeks and my heart pulsated so sharply I thought I could see it through my shirt God, why. Mom. Cancer. Rehab. Chain. ******* Smoker. Depression. Anxiety. Body dysmorphia. God, I am so sorry.   All the cliches in the entire world could not amount to the things I wish I could say to you, and one day make you believe. All the times you saved me from my worst self, only to realize that while you had saved me, it was your own self that was delving deeper and deeper into its own defeat. God. Every time you would come up and give me a hug even when I barely knew you. When I had no idea what you would mean to me, and how much your life would impact mine. I am so sorry. Sorry that your parent's were **** to you. That you didn't get the family you deserve, but made yourself such a strong, completely marvelous person. I'm not romanticising any of the things you went through because I would never shed a good light on things that caused you so much suffering. No, that's not it at all. All the stories you told me tonight seemed too unbearable to be real. But those stories are your harsh realities and I would trade everything I owned, all the money in my bank account, for you to stop what you do to yourself and the undo the numbness you've trained yourself to feel you are NOT sad personified you are NOT just *** appeal and sweet heartbreaker you even know that my heart breaks, literally I can feel it, when you tell me, show me, paint ******* pictures for me of all the things you've dragged yourself through I can't pick your feet up and carry you through, though. God, how I wish I could. You have to do it on your own, I know you can. But I just ******* hope you'll follow through in your terrifying, mystifyingly horrible promise of, "Maybe I'll stick around until then" . . .
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27
Challenges punctuate our lives with question marks. We ask ourselves, “How long?” So we dream. We wonder about each other. So we believe. We concern ourselves with each other’s welfare. So we pray. We doubt our wisdom. So we trust our hearts. We second guess ourselves. So we act in faith. We question our tomorrow. So we cherish the present. We fear the question marks that have punctuated our lives. So we build walls; Walls to hide from our fear, walls to hide from our frustration, And walls to hide from our feelings. Let us never build walls that would cut us off from the world, Or from each other. Within the circle of our fellow strugglers, Our thoughts are punctuated with fewer question marks, And from time to time - a simple period. Here with each other, it's not as difficult to wait for the answer. And the walls don't seem as challenging to climb. Whatever our question, We can dare each other to dream. And in this time of testing, we can hope for the answer, An answer that will be different for every one of us. An answer that punctuates each of our lives With an exclamation point! ©2014 Michael S. Davis
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Jun 12, 2014
Jun 12, 2014 at 11:12 PM UTC
A Punctuated Life (Voc Rehab)
On road trips we would use each other as pillows Brother to window sister to shoulder brother to shoulder sister to window Are we there yet? I mean, Are we grown up yet? Brother to work sister to rehab brother to work sister to school No matter the pattern we all appear leaning on love and blood
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Apr 13, 2015
Apr 13, 2015 at 8:36 PM UTC
Brother, Sister, Repeat
flying juniper arrows fell asleep by the meadows struck my body with vengeance that night you screamed at me sweetly made me tear at my covers blackbelt in bedsheet karate i was the kid in rehab who my counselors let watch movies past my bedtime
0
Jan 2, 2014
Jan 2, 2014 at 8:10 AM UTC
Untitled
Day One: A voice speaks to me. When you realize that being lost is so close to being found, you see a sea of family members plagued within the lineage of licentious newborns and hospital beds. You become yourself, a lisp. Day Two: Long ago in a city left unscorned he was torn, from the cokeheads and colorful regimes, angels sing long songs of separation anxiety and **** withdrawal. I was torn from the deadbeats of supposed society and three day vicodin trips into my mind. So can you let me know when I get there? ‘Cause I left there running…I wonder, did someone ever tell you that two strangers could twist around your neck at beck and that three parked cars and seventeen lonely nights could haunt you for the rest of your faces. Day Three: Tell me of your drug induced hallucinations. Day Four: Wait. Hear. Can’t you listen to the relapse? Stop, think. No. gone. Left. Love. Return. My curious addiction. Go back into yourself and listen. Can’t you hear your soul call to me? It’s loud. Day Five: I remember prizes at the bottoms of cereal boxes, right before the net broke. Will you be first? Snap back to reality. It’s dark in here. Wretch from me… I am crying, screaming, haha! I’m melting inside! Day Six: By plucking her petals you do not gather the beauty of the flower, but the seed inside Caked over in grief, we are not plates that match. But fools of folly caught in a sea of coke and disillusioned discord. Speed stands between directing and orders to death’s soldiers. Day Seven: The difference between God and his counterpart is that he makes exceptions! Except me. Day Eight: Accept me! Please. Wait. No. don’t slow, speed. I can only take so much forgiveness, is a decision, and I cannot make it. I am without it, leave me breathless. Day Nine: The angel of death waits He comes for me, but I am running, finding, hiding my inner Nemo in the hands of oxycodon, privileged in the amenities of amphetamines. I am tired of running! Haggard. Take away my hands, my restraints. Let me feel again. Please. Day Ten: I am awake. There is an apple in my field of vision. Kiss it. Love it. Take it to hedonism and back again. But it knows too much. So tell it everything will be ok. It lives in epilepsy. So placate it. Resurrect my apocalypse.
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Jul 31, 2013
Jul 31, 2013 at 8:57 PM UTC
Rehab Diary
Day One: A voice speaks to me. When you realize that being lost is so close to being found, you see a sea of family members plagued within the lineage of licentious newborns and hospital beds. You become yourself, a lisp. Day Two: Long ago in a city left unscorned he was torn, from the cokeheads and colorful regimes, angels sing long songs of separation anxiety and **** withdrawal. I was torn from the deadbeats of supposed society and three day vicodin trips into my mind. So can you let me know when I get there? ‘Cause I left there running…I wonder, did someone ever tell you that two strangers could twist around your neck at beck and that three parked cars and seventeen lonely nights could haunt you for the rest of your faces. Day Three: Tell me of your drug induced hallucinations. Day Four: Wait. Hear. Can’t you listen to the relapse? Stop, think. No. gone. Left. Love. Return. My curious addiction. Go back into yourself and listen. Can’t you hear your soul call to me? It’s loud. Day Five: I remember prizes at the bottoms of cereal boxes, right before the net broke. Will you be first? Snap back to reality. It’s dark in here. Wretch from me… I am crying, screaming, haha! I’m melting inside! Day Six: By plucking her petals you do not gather the beauty of the flower, but the seed inside Caked over in grief, we are not plates that match. But fools of folly caught in a sea of coke and disillusioned discord. Speed stands between directing and orders to death’s soldiers. Day Seven: The difference between God and his counterpart is that he makes exceptions! Except me. Day Eight: Accept me! Please. Wait. No. don’t slow, speed. I can only take so much forgiveness, is a decision, and I cannot make it. I am without it, leave me breathless. Day Nine: The angel of death waits He comes for me, but I am running, finding, hiding my inner Nemo in the hands of oxycodon, privileged in the amenities of amphetamines. I am tired of running! Haggard. Take away my hands, my restraints. Let me feel again. Please. Day Ten: I am awake. There is an apple in my field of vision. Kiss it. Love it. Take it to hedonism and back again. But it knows too much. So tell it everything will be ok. It lives in epilepsy. So placate it. Resurrect my apocalypse.
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On the day that I lost my name I took a nice long walk To the edge of infinity, Searching for it You know, they say the earth is round And as I leaned to peer over the side of it There, lay a vast blanket of outer space No continuous ground— like they said No path to move on from Dead-end roads  and deadened feet Had led me to this edge, where I cut myself on contemplative thorns “At what point did he stop loving me?” “My friends are gone” “Rehab couldn’t fix me” “I don’t want to wake up tomorrow” No, the world isn’t round My thoughts are round And so are my vices Always spinning and falling Into a perpetual mental cycle So when I looked beyond the cliffs of my flat Earth Into the depths of nothingness I pondered what it would feel like To       tippy                  toe                          my way over                   To lose myself forever If I never wake up tomorrow Would they remember my name?
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Jul 17, 2018
Jul 17, 2018 at 9:19 PM UTC
To the Edge
You are my ****** The ever-nagging drug addiction That keeps tugging at my strings No matter the rehab I have done upon my soul, Regardless how bad I know you are for me - But you were worse. You could never be my Heroine, The one who saves me from my worst, To be the last, the only, by my side, To hold my hand and be my strength when I fail, Telling me, no matter what the stars say, Everything is going to be fine - But you could never be that. You are my ****** That which I will always desire - no matter how long I have been clean of you - But I now know its not the love affair I thought it once was, I bear the emotional scars like needle marks, Those I used to hide, I now wear open and honest, telling what you did, And somehow, You were always worse.
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Jun 18, 2011
Jun 18, 2011 at 6:36 PM UTC
****** not Heroine