m Oct 2017
It’s hard to find
the truth in the dark.
My thoughts stumble
into others
trying to sort
the real from the fake.
I cannot tell
if the shadows
that are on my wall
are real monsters
or ones of my own creation.
Either way  
I will allow them
to swallow me whole.

While the edges
of the truth blur
you lie next to me.
You are peaceful.
You are silent.
You are motionless.
I want to scream.
I do not have
the courage to ask you
what is real
and what is fake.
I do not have
the courage to
turn on the lights.
Jay 6d
Soft wet sand squishes under my toes
Cool water soon laps at my ankles
Telltale signs - the crowing of birds,
The laughter of children
The seabreeze at my nose

The water invites me in. I wade
Through every choice I thought I made.
Through time itself.

Clouds blanket the
Sun and I see myself in the sky, drowning,
Words from a script caught in my throat,
The water, the sand, they force me through it.

The curtains hiding the truth fall
Darkness seeps through the seafoam
I see the meaninglessness of it all
My reality is not my home

I want to turn around
Go back to what I know
But the water takes me by the leg
And little fingers of sand pull me on
I hate this life and I hate this place,
hate the terrible truth I’ve found

The fingers have become hands.
They do not let me go,
The waves bubble a lullaby, a dirge
“Bring your body closer still, with great care
We will keep it.”

Faces in the waves call to me,
The water croons its song
With the sun, wit abandoned me
And so my feet march on

I stay awake at night
Humming the ocean’s tune
Counting the stars on my ceiling,
I try to convince myself
Reality is just my room

The gentle fingers of sand are teeth now
Gnawing, gnashing, scraping teeth
The ocean screeches and howls a sound
Like playing a vinyl on a pizza crust
Like playing a knife on a breathing rib cage

Under my pillow lies
A single, sandy tooth. But come the dawn
My hand, hidden under the cushions will be withdrawn
I will awake, soft wet static under my toes
Cool delusion soon laps at my ankles.
Telltale signs - the taste of bile,
The script starving my lungs,
The water caught in my ears, babbling in my head, the
voice I’ve always known.
This poem was about my own struggle to be my authentic self, in the face of what my body and the thought process I had been conditioned to have told me.
grace snoddy Mar 16
for so long,
i made one with the cracks in the road,
making sure i never stepped on one.
and i never cared to notice
how tired i was from doing it.

maybe it was because
the innocence
and easygoing youth
shielded my eyes
like the white linen curtains
that used to hang lazily on my window.

for so long,
the nine o’clock news
never bothered me
as much as it does now.
and the fact that everyone seems to drag their feet
at the same miserable pace
never struck my mind.
days keep growing faster
at an undetectable rate,
and i’m just starting to see that.

maybe it was because
reality tore the drapes down,
letting all of the light
shine on the things that were
left in the dark.
because growing older
was one of the things
that i chose
to leave in the corner.
English Jam Mar 4
[Part the First]

There's some giddy, childish sensation
The hope of a new generation

Faceless cameras war for my voice
A flashing ocean of stomps and shoves
Taken from me is my choice
Given is a false sense of love
They smile too wide to be true
Contorted and stretched, like some plastic
But they're all I have before the blue
So deep breaths, and then come dramatics

People who pass me by
Don't seem to realise
The emptiness of the sky
They just need to see me sign

They ask:
Is it lonely up in space?
Is it a cold, abandoned place?
Is it bright amongst the stars?
Do you know who you really are?

[Part the Second]

My life has faded to drunken thoughts
Reality doesn't confirm what can't be bought

The multicoloured psychedelia
Of nebula turning to rainbows
Now looks more fake than ever
And so my sanity goes
There's a beast out there, lurking
I'm not sure if it wants me
But my hope is hiding, sulking
From the abyss that can hear and see

The worst way to die is alone
Where there's no one who can help me
As my punishment destroys my home
At least, from my memory

They screech:
It's so lonely up in space
It's a cold, abandoned place
It's too bright amongst the stars
I think I'm dreaming too far

[Part the Third]

The faintest echo of laughter
Presents itself as my only answer

It's distant, like someone drowning in ecstasy
But it rings from the walls to my ears
The effect of the starry-eyed seas
Has mutated into whimpering fears
I know I'm not amongst the stars anymore
But the damage cannot be undone
So I gave myself to the floor
I could lie here, and never see the sun

Space could've never actually existed
Just a vivid fantasy of escape
But my mind has been so twisted
It must've been the cruelty of fate

They wonder:
Was it lonely up in space?
Was it a cold, abandoned place?
Will the stars ever forgive?
Do I still have a life to live?
Just a three-part theatrical space story I was casually thinking of. Wow, that sounds pretty arrogant (but I meant it in a nice way:)
Waking up in cold sweat
was it real or just a threat?

I'm not...


                                                 sure.


It really scares me sometimes
              /not seeing with my eyes/

Desperately looking through my             memories

What isn't real, or rather, what is?
Maybe I need to take my pills
                                to see the kills
                                      of my dreams

It gives me chills
To have the feels

                                               -awake-
Some stuff i'm going through right now...
I dreamt that they all left me in a dark night,
Tears were crawling down my cheeks,
Cold was freezing up my heart,
Wind was flying my thoughts in circles infront of my swollen watery  eyes ,
I thought happiness was finally lingered in my life,
I found out that it was waning once more,
Waving from behind those bushy trees,
I heard my peace starting to rumble,
I felt my eyes going lifeless,
I dash for happiness,
Like an addict who scurries to be drugged,
Turned out that it doesn’t always have to be in the same shape,
So places,people and old routines can’t make the pills,
for the ingredients always change.
Mei B Jul 10
It was that first time when I looked at you.
You started running through my mind.
Everything went along step by step until that one day you’d look at me, and that’s when I knew, I’d always had this feeling when I’m around you.

All your gestures stunned me in a way, I felt light when you hugged me that one day, liked you’d
beg me to stay.
Of course, I’d never let go anyways.

Especially that valuable smile, I’d look at you and you flash it at me.
When I compliment you, your feedback is what I seek, you win.
Always leaving me weak.

What I love about you, there are so many things.
Thinking about it…I’m so glad it’s not a dream.
That’s why reality is here for me.

As I write this poem for you, I’m thinking about you at the same time.
Making words out of the blue to rhyme.

I’m glad I get to know you, and can’t get over your smile too.
This probably seems lame, but there’s just so many things I can’t explain.
for a special moment that I didn’t think would come full circle in my life. for him.
Tori Ginter Jul 11
You didn’t even call...
I told on Monday how I’d only had a couple days till I was gone.
But that wasn’t enough for you
I’d have to be dying in order for you to call
Little do you know I am, it’s why I must leave this place that is killing me slowly.
But I still have hope
A dream
You’ll be standing there at the end of the aisle right before I  board.
I will drop my bags and run as fast as I can into you
You’ll be the excuse I’ve been looking for to stay
But the reality is
You’re the excuse that makes me have to leave.
Your silence screams leave more than goodbye
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