"prestidigitation" poems
You ought to know Mr. Mistoffelees!
The Original Conjuring Cat—
(There can be no doubt about that).
Please listen to me and don’t scoff. All his
Inventions are off his own bat.
There’s no such Cat in the metropolis;
He holds all the patent monopolies
For performing suprising illusions
And creating eccentric confusions.
At prestidigitation
And at legerdemain
He’ll defy examination
And deceive you again.
The greatest magicians have something to learn
From Mr. Mistoffelees’ Conjuring Turn.
Presto!
Away we go!
And we all say: OH!
Well I never!
Was there ever
A Cat so clever
As Magical Mr. Mistoffelees!
He is quiet and small, he is black
From his ears to the tip of his tail;
He can creep through the tiniest crack,
He can walk on the narrowest rail.
He can pick any card from a pack,
He is equally cunning with dice;
He is always deceiving you into believing
That he’s only hunting for mice.
He can play any trick with a cork
Or a spoon and a bit of fish-paste;
If you look for a knife or a fork
And you think it is merely misplaced—
You have seen it one moment, and then it is gawn!
But you’ll find it next week lying out on the lawn.
And we all say: OH!
Well I never!
Was there ever
A Cat so clever
As Magical Mr. Mistoffelees!
His manner is vague and aloof,
You would think there was nobody shyer—
But his voice has been heard on the roof
When he was curled up by the fire.
And he’s sometimes been heard by the fire
When he was about on the roof—
(At least we all heard that somebody purred)
Which is incontestable proof
Of his singular magical powers:
And I have known the family to call
Him in from the garden for hours,
While he was asleep in the hall.
And not long ago this phenomenal Cat
Produced seven kittens right out of a hat!
And we all said: OH!
Well I never!
Did you ever
Know a Cat so clever
As Magical Mr. Mistoffelees!
2.5k
treacherously torrid and torrential torrents of totally tangential tumultuous tortuous ; tyrannically torturous adjunct viably salient seethe.
procrastinating pandemic plenipotentiary prosthesis ; prosaically pragmatic parenthetical predication predilection premise prognostication
panoramic tableau preternatural propensity proclivity prestidigitation gesticulation :
gyration guidon ; ghastly gruesome grotesque hideously horrible horrendous heinous
grotty gnarly
diabolically maniacal dementia brusque macabre abrupt
awful
amalgamated anathema analysis agnate aggregate aberrance
somatalogy virtuoso cognate obduracy
worse
rudiment ebullience , confluence effluent effusion affluent , prolific profusity opulence , cogent fecund secular secund , recondite redolence abstrusely obstreperous mesomerism resonance resilience
protractive perpetude futurity
blither blandishing blabber burnishing boresome blahs
lithe blithe jabber prattle chatter tithe
morose morsel moribundness
stolid stoic
stalwart bastion bulwark
Oct 24, 2013
Oct 24, 2013 at 5:45 PM UTC
Never disown hope
In the swallow of storms
Give up the recitation
Of all previous forms
I was an affirmation
Firm in someone’s grip
Hidden under doorways
Now I’m about slip
Reminders of destitution
Reaching for solutions
Running the prestidigitation
Trying to solve my situation
Never disown hope
In the swallow of storms
Give up the recitation
Of all previous forms
Give the revolution
Take your hands from the die.
I never give up.
One must see the sky
I captured the vision.
A new world inside my eye
Feb 11, 2010
Feb 11, 2010 at 5:16 PM UTC
Verily the exordium told anent a beauty engirdled in her fedora
soliciting those whoever descried her into her mere servile admirer
eight trenchant tinctures upon her body invigorate like a cadenza
I dare not to contradict the verity that I am beguiled afore her
whilst the snain distilled faintly enwreathed her in unctuous silk
concordantly she devote herself earnestly to the impeccable rain
that emanate her fragile poetry with prestidigitation in a whisk
forsooth she is but the vernacular sobriquet to the soul of the rain
recall me otherwhile during the rainstorm champagne did coerce
and the sunset's glass of wine exude her ingratiating persona
like a myriad of aphrodisiac summarized in a single verse
when harmony and lyrics danced in the crepuscular crescendo
all of that needed to be enunciated is it is you
do not harshly let me be thy unrequited dilettante
Jul 15, 2013
Jul 15, 2013 at 4:27 AM UTC
At end of my show . . .
Angel in the wings appeared,
. . . True love came to me.
Jun 28, 2014
Jun 28, 2014 at 1:24 AM UTC
Cheap imitations and prestidigitation
A head full of acid and water on the knee
Punch in
Punch out
I'm filing a work related grievance
For managerial negligence
I protest and picket
My picket sign parade along the picket line
Put me in the Warsaw ghetto
Make me wear a star
Put me to work
Until I starve
I want my independent identity
But the in-crowd beckons me to live in anonymity
-Tommy Johnson
Jun 7, 2014
Jun 7, 2014 at 8:17 PM UTC
You know the feeling, dear
Lover of Words.
Sounds of syllables
rolling through your mind
like deliciousness itself.
Sometimes it's just the sound, then a glint
of meaning smiles at you, inviting you.
Lifting it gently, like a sleeping child
you listen for potential phrases,
sentences emerging from within her dreams.
Tuck the covers lightly
around your new poem child,
and may the Muse of Words
favor her, and you.
Mar 31, 2016
Mar 31, 2016 at 5:22 PM UTC
I lit a cigarette to watch it burn down
Instead of filling my lungs with it slowly
The tendrils kept my thoughts at bay, for now
Fingers shook as my brain began to cloud
But smoke is always inescapable
Without putting it to my lips, I lost
Misery made me completely star-crossed
Feb 12, 2013
Feb 12, 2013 at 11:51 PM UTC
By: Cedric McClester
Here are the wherefores and whys
Alternative facts are just lies
Projected as strong alibis
To misdirect the unwise
The photos offer us the proof
That alternative facts aren’t the truth
From the mouth of the liar and chief
It’s incredulous beyond belief
Admittedly she’s a real jewel
Convincing to those she can fool
But she’s being used like a tool
And that is unusual and cruel
The universe she’s living in
Is ruled by an ocean of spin
She does it because she can
Can we have the church say amen
The press is truly amazed
How she instantly coined the phrase
Alternative facts now replays
In interesting and varied ways
Like no one wants to see his taxes
When the opposite is where the facts is
But I guess she’s had so much practice
At the prestidigitation she waxes
She’s his spokesperson, as it were
Her words rarely represent her
Over time it becomes a blur
Though that thought might not occur
His taxes remain on a shelf
So blame him and nobody else
If he de-legitimizes himself
Like Kramden, I’m talkin’ ‘bout Ralph
Cedric McClester, Copyright © 2017. All rights reserved.
Jan 23, 2017
Jan 23, 2017 at 8:22 AM UTC
You love to be sesquipidilian,
As you lay your tiles on to my board,
With your totally sheer sciolism,
Is how all of your big points are scored
Your intricate skills of tmesis,
Laid horizontal and vertically on my squares,
As you use your well thought out accoutrements,
To cover me so I'm no longer bare.
You never confabulate with opponents
Your attention's always fixated on me,
That's why I'm ebullient and awaiting your prestidigitation,
Each and every time you decide to play me.
Jun 11, 2020
Jun 11, 2020 at 3:30 PM UTC
SENTENCING
I understand a thief picking my pocket
Or sneaking in at night to burglarize
I understand prestidigitation tricks
Seeming miracles before my eyes.
It is easy to understand a robber
The holdup of some passerby.
They don’t have a conscience so
They don’t even have to try.
I understand the bullies in schools
The ones who disrespect the rules.
Probably their parents were creeps
Abused them while they would sleep.
The kids can become nasty, and mean.
It’s high on the list of evil I’ve seen.
Because to abuse a child is a sin
And it ruins the child before it begins.
It makes sense for bad butchers
To carve off a bit from the customers
Especially if they never get caught;
It is very much the way they were taught.
It’s so much like those confidence men
Take money their marks won’t see again.
And creeps sell phony knockoff goods.
All kinds of bastardy comes out of the woods.
But, I can’t understand the people who
Make huge money off all that they do
To sell their fellow countrymen out.
That is a very special kind of lout.
The kind that get elected to high office
And behave in a way that is lawless.
These people stole everything they got.
They deserve to be taken out and shot.
Brent Kincaid
3/16/2015
Mar 17, 2015
Mar 17, 2015 at 12:24 AM UTC
(alter knit lee titled: vita in oculis nudato)
goo goo gaga I wanna yell
cuz, synonymous
with other wordsmiths,
or...well
whatever will eire'n burr,
a sought after creative
passionate pursuit aye tell
ye a boot me own aha...eureka insightful
revelation explaining
ma quotidian writing spell,
and phalanges skitter
across qwerty keyboard
at light in an attempt to quell
onslaught tidal wave crashing
upon me conscious state pell mell
which tsunami flood spongy
heady gray matter with hell
over high tide heals assailing,
bruiting, clobbering this fell
low inducing (me) to play
Handel's Semantic Water Music
on the smallish piccolo cello
which Sirens of Tighten,
(who just appeared out of thin aire -
cuz scriveners can resort
to prestidigitation to make appear
any necessary entity
without rhyme or reason),
anyway, this sylph sea Oceanids nymph
i.e. mermaids didst dee clear
particularly via
barely audible verbal communication
sotto voce en dear
ring gently beckoning
affinity this modest heir
to secret himself within secluded lair
whence, an automatic
erectile flickr, kickstarted,
levitated, and manifested
an instantaneous jubilant kik
lobbed me near
this seductive, sedulous, and sedum
scented sir experienced hypnotic stare
charming froto into trance scandent state
as if by magic the tubular
testicular proboscis didst inflate
aptly serving as modus operandi flagellate
thus proving a "happy ending" against being celibate.
Mar 25, 2018
Mar 25, 2018 at 8:04 PM UTC
Don't ask me cause i wanted more
Am a king In my own dwelling
I tried calling to the platform
She never came
Money makes the rule
I got the act I know
I want to do it no one knows
They don't understand
So I say to you give me
A platform to prove myself
Prestidigitation, when the time comes
But it never went
the time is now
Talented is my own Neptune
In the house of praise
my name will make the hall of fame
As the sun and stars dewlls
Before the fat lady sings
Apr 3, 2016
Apr 3, 2016 at 1:55 AM UTC
They called him Wit the Mystic
though his real name was unknown.
Just another John Doe, he,
on the edge and most alone.
But with a dusty derby hat,
and a little dedication,
he became a vagrant wizard,
mastered prestidigitation.
Misdirection, sleight of hand,
the man could do it all.
An expert with a deck of cards,
or three cups and a ball.
And somehow, out of thinnest air,
with magic palpable and real,
he managed to manipulate,
create many a hand-out meal.
Oohs and ahs in multitudes
would shower him with praise.
He plied his trade with pride in spades
on even the rainy days.
Though masterful and powerful,
old Wit still struggled through-
living in the shadows, man,
can be a tricky thing to do.
Old Wit the Mystic had one trick
that he had always feared.
Alas, the man's last bow had come,
and then he disappeared.
Where the wizard ended up,
nobody really knows.
Among the stars and legends, or
with the rest of the John Does?
Jan 11, 2017
Jan 11, 2017 at 9:12 AM UTC
Or Woman, Or Child, Or...
The following elucidated
conjecture actually can
(reed best) be taken with a grain
of salt, and no ban
nah nah split 'ope ya 'ere me
cloud and lear, cuz (Oh my...
heavens to Betsy), ennui
got pulled by Evan -
Jewel Lean, who handed this long fellow
(wads worth to you)
speculation with fan
see prestidigitation legerdemain - tan
ta mount to cheap tricks
re: out of thin air
by this half
fast hue man,
Hill Billy ***** Wonka Nilly,
who blithely doth asseverate
apothegm (poem title) equally applicable
Century21 today Aswan
**** maxim initially
bespoke, when collective
primates begat enfant terrible
foo fighting predetermining anon
metastasizing debacle Yeti
bedeviling civilization
a bajillion years in the future with
Matthew Scott Harris deadpan
words worth less his way
before even an odd iota
of dire straight sultan
of swing didst merely span
spottily scattered amidst
pristine Earth, where
unchanging arboreal
beastie boys to oman,
and flock of sea gulls
continuity elapsed – Ivan
hunch, albeit un
recorded disc contented sow
sow hogtied pan
dum mo' nee ham, or
blessed historical events,
kept (stay'n) alive,
courtesy"FAKE" Trump
petting Dapper Dan,
where he knit pattern,
qua oral tradition, sans clan
destine scattered hot pockets
of sparse **** sapiens,
i.e. humanity LESS preponderant,
primary, and/or prolific,
where superstitions parlayed
(voodoo with no Fran Schwa),
and whirling dervishes fed elan,
which earliest recorded (doctored,
digitized, and demented
oh yea), not
tomb mitt to dimly mentioned
asper "time and tide
wait for no man"
purportedly by one
Saint Marher, circa:
1225 anno domini.
Sep 23, 2018
Sep 23, 2018 at 3:27 AM UTC
*Sometimes the velvet blue night is a sorcerers cloak , prestidigitation
centered on my downfall , the pun of a hurtful joke , belted to the yoke ,
trudging my demons at the crack of the whip , a clipper ship mired in the
doldrums yet life has no braking system , it's a no replay theorem , no drain to open to whirlpool away , no script to learn of the coming days , no Madison Square Garden for petty songs , no oracle defining right from wrong* ..
Oct 4, 2016
Oct 4, 2016 at 8:02 PM UTC
trump - hide and run for headline cover before armageddon
arc de triomphe interesting facts
if zee al chemist trump doth win go hide in the bunker
to save your ***
brace yourself as this don holed
confabulates that gold iz brass
and conjures prestidigitation
like spinning false hoods in2 truth - crass
- - - - - - - - - - - - -
a synonym force head fabricator -
will threaten democracy, thus be afraid
as this pompous voice quotes
from hiz playbook, which = a charade
the hard core truths, he
(who i liken to the plague) doth evade
- - - - - - - - - - - - -
and dreams up fault of Barack Obama
for extinction of dinosaurs,
crucifixion of Jesus Christ
down fall of the Roman Empire,
or far tethered Fred Flintsone ca fetching an escapade
- - - - - - - - - - - - -
yea...this rip pub lick'n presidential contender
evinces a psyche frayed
building and monopolizing castles in the sky -
nonexistent as a grade
- - - - - - - - - - - - -
school fib - or donning role
as play ground bully teaming with ivan
the terrible to dominate the greensward
in the above fiction, but...man
that loose canon dressing his
- - - - - - - - - - - - -
"make america great again" gag line - whar i ran
and mid eastern countries will rise
as one cheering him as star of global hit parade
despite any raging oppositional pandaemonium
birth er ring a conflagration
- - - - - - - - - - - - -
kenya believe the world acquiesces
to thine projected masquerade
blocking im grate shunning crowds -
which number of people rival in size
taller (if stack one atop thee other)
- - - - - - - - - - - - -
than the trump tower casino or high rise
with his signature - hm...mebbe funds provided
by drug lords, the swedish house mafia
or terrorist ties???
- - - - - - - - - - - - -
whom security details silence by tossing a hand grenade
sham on you Potemkin village people for quaffing draughts
from elixir purportedly to transform visage with trademark
swept back, wavy and coiffed hirsute.
Jan 9, 2018
Jan 9, 2018 at 12:40 AM UTC
Though thine two grown
former babes in crib age,
now lead checkered lives,
no longer monopolize my time
as though their persons went backstage
either one embracing, judging,
and negotiating positive
chutes and ladders with courage
evoking glee this papa
helped both beautiful lasses
avoid being risk averse
navigating life with minimal damage
though to get ahead of the class,
(asper the eldest Eden Liat)
credit karma fairly and squarely attributed
to herself with encourage
meant from this papa, who oft time
felt he lacked any clue
akin to a hobbled battleship left
to drift at sea, whence,
upon landfall sub
sequent lee forced to forage
in a foreign dominion (akin to being
among Settlers of Catan),
plus devoid of instruments to gauge,
an optimal strategic operation,
thus figuratively groping in the dark
(unaware of a brewing twister)
guided by blind faith
doth admit saying sorry,
but apologetic homage
would disqualify thyself,
a "FAKE" mastermind
undeserving of just desserts,
unfairly via diktat plucking sweet treats
awash within Candy Land,
a deceptive image
entrancing, luring and, spellbinding
ultimately incurring trouble,
particularly when Shana Aubrey
(younger by about
twenty six months)
garnered lion's share of parental attention
necessitated mandatory intervention
due to language
skills, plus pronounced
developmental delay,
where supreme social service
sages gentle massage
wrought divine prestidigitation
as one after another
case worker did overencourage
to counteract congenital
cognitive setback (coalesced in utero),
now finds das dada envious
(cuz, aye got mired, hogtied,
and bogged down with
obsessive compulsive trivial pursuit,
hence warrant so lucky as thee Punim)
steers ship shape body electric
round her uncharted cerebral
cape of good hope passage.
Jul 9, 2018
Jul 9, 2018 at 11:00 AM UTC
Asper daily expounding fostering
inchoate manifesting mod
er writ writing quality,
solitary scrimmage tackling
undertaking, yielding whir
ring, sputtering, kickstarting, and
buzz-feeding at competitive, communal
crowed did metaphorical trough,
where household named author's
top New York Times best seller
tier, overshadowing under
rated genre bending, breakout aspiring,
story board qualifying,
opportunistic newbie man
use script artful dodgers
mere dust collecting drafts,
anticipating to stir infectious interest
incumbent - at mercy,
tripwire activating quint
essential key, which anchors print
ting projected uncertain
popularity first edition,
awakening, guiding, nosing
asymptote analogy steering
reader toward nascent
scribe, where paper
back writer wannabe,
toils away incorporating subtle
(hook, line and sinker) techniques,
(albeit apropos literary
ploys, a true test tum ment,
viz sophisticated gambits
to massage late tint
prestidigitation abra ca dab rah,
sine non qua cogent
see kant, and tangent triggers
modest mien fortified, exemplified,
and downplayed akin
to unassuming Clark Kent
in his cape ably nonchalant
transformation into superman,
and/or more pointedly,
some original heft leant
to set apart striking
poignant implement
exhibited by aspiring
writer daily revising,
albeit gal or gent
his/her uniquely obscure
trademark, but
eventually keen agent
assays non-boastful writing style
im prim mature print,
sans unassuming swiftly tailored
harried style seduces seek
curing sincere overnight reverent,
well deserved kudos
comically marveling
at thee most im portent
salient strengths, per
hops hue moored opulent
quality instigates
affinity toward nascent,
bar riddle be, bill leading,
bud ding scrivener,
not necessary alluding
to a hypothetical outlier
thus, any similarity between the
above statement and
a living person perchance named
Matthew Scott Harris
purely coincidental.
Oct 3, 2018
Oct 3, 2018 at 1:10 AM UTC
To Be Pressed By A Dumbbell
Two fifteen pound
steely danse sing
wrought iron dumbbells
ill-tempered, impatiently,
and intensely a weight
their turn to hmm... press me,
and forthwith dense trait
heavy handed prestidigitation
to yours truly, this primate
currently attempting
to craft sad excuse
for a poem, sans far fetched
notion, aye trite re: late
engendering, foisting, and goading
bizarre lifelike qualities
to inanimate solid helpmate
to build (and/or oven
just tone) muscles bitterly, painfully,
resignedly wince, where washboard
abdomen long a goner
impossible to recoup,
whar hide didst narrate
ting hours sculpting great
former Adonis build
on these, now nada so lovely
bones, and experience
spiritual strife to oscillate,
perhaps witness sing
angst to esse skill late
heady feeling healthy vim within
myself, how just
with verily at least dedicate
half hour exercise can be great
for body, mind, and
soul triage, otherwise...
basic gravitational laws
of physics gladly
hand me unwanted fate,
how gradually physique
will eventually demonstrate
flabby, droopy, and
unwanted addy post tissue create
ting another reason to berate,
castigate, emasculate, where
self repudiation will germinate
(albeit, thence in extremis), yours truly
doth relinquish fitness regime
resulting sparking, and taste
testing casus belli dictate
tête-à-tête, viz hasty
unconditional surrender to
a void mortal kombat,
which latter, would exterminate,
the forces of yin and yang,
re: lee (I rub hurts) loch cur,
thence finding me fraught,
(yule hiss see - uselessly)
grant ting soul
option to disintegrate,
in the event emotional civil war,
rents asunder every fiber
of mine being, which
wrath wracked wraith self destruction
twill woefully satiate.
Oct 18, 2018
Oct 18, 2018 at 3:37 PM UTC