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The pain/ waxes and wains/ to know shes/ really gone/ hasn't tried to come back to me/ I was always fine feeling a little sick/ as long as she returned with my medicine.

But now its gotten worse/ my eyes flooded/ the tsunami within/ please take me with you/ is it ok to be this weak/ probably/ not/ I realized this morning/ I won't be waking up with her tomorrow/ and sorrow is my best friend/  I haven't shed tears for a few years now/ it feels incredible to be alive/ every time I have to pass her stop now/ it will **** me/ I can't go to the Met/ I can't take the J/ I can't walk to SoHo from work/ I can't exist on this earth without her.

She never loved me/ just told me what I wanted to hear/ I showed her all my fears/ she asked me to trust her, and so I did/ gave her the keys/ let her in/ she kept her muddy shoes on my carpet/ I've written so many poems about the way she makes me feel/ just an attempt to heal the splinters I got from running barefoot on her boardwalk.

This is an elephant sitting on my chest/ a poison fruit in my stomach/ one thing we could agree on/ banana pancakes in the morning/ I would look at her in awe/ shes a triumph of humankind/ one thing I think/ maybe we use logic + reason to protect ourselves/ and those with a dominance in thinking can be some of the most hurt/ perhaps not/ I have to get to work now/ I'd rather be in bed having a good cry/ only a few drops this time/ only a few months she's been in my heart.
Yuki Jan 18
What should I do
when my heart
feels so heavy?
I am not much of
a weight lifter,
I do not know
how to raise it
from the ashes
and bring it back to life.
Ellie Dec 2014
A boyfriend and a goal
The fuel to my eating disorder.
Just 5 pounds.
No dessert tonight
Just 4 pounds.
No dessert tonight
Half a sandwich for lunch
Just 3 pounds.
No dessert tonight
Half a sandwich for lunch
Only a salad for dinner
Just 2 pounds.
No dessert tonight
Half a sandwich for lunch
Only a salad for dinner
I'll go for a run
Just 1 pound.
No dessert tonight
Half a sandwich for lunch
Only a salad for dinner
I'll go for a run
No breakfast tomorrow
Just **5 more pounds...
I've been healthy and happy for 2 1/2 years.  To anyone struggling: you can beat this, I believe in you!
Songs abound in Time as running due paid
We of Merry Emotion dance a Jig
And see you Happy toss-coins on the Said,
Mark farthings for pounds won on Cocktail's Lip
And whilst we Celebrate, what is that Chest,
Eating Sweets beneath the Lottery's Lot?
That's a nice hobby; Dried lollie's possessed
And Playful Numbers tucked beneath forgot
Taking Remembrance when he was Alive
With Chances simply Fun and Truly told
That the Greatest Theme; Not for Profit's Bide
But Storied Values hungry tongues retold.
What such Lesson this, a Blackboard can learn
Gems studded aside; That same Chest you earn.
#tomdaleytv #tomdaley1994
Dan Filcek Apr 2015
collect payment support
regulatory regimes including failed merger which
effect enclosed circle including capital
Other responsibilities include:
enforce administering registrations
Responsibility protection
overarching public service
strong cadre investigating previous criminal work
Alcohol aligned
tackle pounds
Their skills range: intrusive
arrest, entry, search, detention.
detain anyone committed
listed parts which deter intelligence
analysis assessment:
the nascent department staff
occupies office
cultures: mating the terrier with the retriever
interim period empowered
relation matters within remit
Customs: ethnic-minority permanent policy of racial discrimination.
This year for Poetry Month, I decided to post a "found poem" every day. If writing a poem is like painting, a "found poem" is like sculpting. - source - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/HM_Revenue_and_Customs
King Panda Jun 2016
like red lion parts
crotch rocket
nut cup
anything done behind
a dumpster in the dark
yes, always
because you never liked how
light peeked through my thin
hair
or how I squinted
my eyes when I kissed you
“Just close them all the way
*******!!”
of course, I obliged
anything to keep you
away from your mother
anything to keep you
out of the garage
the sulfur smell
the demons in your
drinking marble
but god,
the vibration
the car peeling out
on the driveway and
“Here take this.”
all of me reminded you
of her
all of me
“Rest, darling. Rest.”
and every time the night
ended with unclothed gin
bedspreads like
forts and painted
walls
“Go **** youself.”
and all was lost
my body
my grief
10 pounds lighter
sweat soaked through
the carpet
King Panda May 2016
the river is
drinking it
sequins
blankets
the river runs past
hobos
unidentified
water fowl
two trolls
taking shelter under
the bridge
there’s conversation
in another language
fiendish brains connecting
fiendish yet
beautiful
thunder
tampons
a turtle
a naked boy
on the patio
rain
definitely
rain
unmatched
and the steam
coming from the
bridge
once there was a troll
on my face
and I swatted it
with a broom
but it came back
it came back
with you

laughter pounds
with the rain
laughter that wears
emotion like
skin
soft
elastic
still pink
bouncing
on the river’s surface
breaking
absorbed
sustenance for
the trolls
like fiends with faces
like minds with names
these two connect
with spark
and the rain
falls
the stillness under
nature’s
machinery
Heidi Shavill Feb 2013
CHOMO
Anger building up in me
Pounds my skull quite violently
I can’t sit still so I just pace
Until again he invades my space.
Afraid to tell, I rage and scream,
Upon deaf ears falls my suffering
The pain inside I've rarely shown
Cripples me if I’m alone.
Too easily they let it slide,
What he did for years they tried
To hide the truth and blame the one
  Ripped apart by their ******* son.
Heidi Shavill
2013
I believe you, it's not your fault.
Nobody Sep 2017
First he demanded I force him on the bed.
He said don’t dare relent till he’s fully spent.
So I start by removing all of his clothes,
kiss and bite him all over, so very slow.

Then he makes me bind both his hands tight,
orders a satin scarf to blind his eyes.
Next I gently bite his neck on both sides,
stirred on even more by his ****** cries.

My tongue wants to lick him just where he likes,
he trembles and shakes as I lick him up right.
He’s hard and tasty, I tease him till I’m sore;
**** and stop, he can’t take it, and begs for more.  

My mouth is so warm, he’s slippery wet.
I take it, and smother my throat in the mess;
and after he’s been pushed so close to the edge,
he rapidly pounds my mouth till the end.
The uniVerse Oct 2015
I want you to know
that I still care
even though
I despair
and my heavy heart
it's still beating
from the outskirts
where life is fleeting
I still hold on
to my sanity
but I don't belong
with gravity
let me float upon clouds
let me soar in the sky
yet still my heart pounds
and I don't know why
why I'm still here
to be used like a lover
but riddled with fear
still yet to discover
for it to become clear
tell me your secrets
that I will hold dear
fill me with regrets
in exchange for my heart
let time forget
the things that have passed.
https://www.instagram.com/p/ByV2HZ7noWM/
Cindra Carr Oct 2010
The dread of consciousness fills me.
The numbness fades away
As I reach out for the space beside me.
The fire lights the blood
Illuminating it for all to see
No one will though.
I am alone again.
The blood pounds through my head
Beating itself against my skull
‘Out!’ It wails at me.
I cannot.
‘Alain…’
My voice cracks
Like the ancient creaks of a tomb.
Forever I am tormented.
Forever she will be out of reach.
‘No,’ the fire hisses at me.
‘No!’ It cries building itself up.
‘I cannot!’ I cry raising my arms
Shielding against the wall of blood and fire
I am lost.

cc2010
Lizzy Apr 2015
Pill one was bad,
It made me sick.
Didn't work too well.
The zombie i became,
Drove some away.
It made the monsters multiply.
I spent my days in bed,
Too tired to move.
But lighting would strike my lips,
If I dare stop.

The next was heaven,
God lived in that pill.
Still on number one though,
It only added to my war.
See, number two had other uses.
I could take three and feel like flying.
I could crush it into dust,
And smell it's sweet high.
Pill number two got me really ******* high.

The crash from number two,
Pushed me to number three.
Withdrawal made me twitch,
Sent electricity through my veins.
Number three replaced two.
Still on one,
I hoped it would be the change.
It only made me fear for my life.
It killed my love,
Left me to die.

Doctor number two,
Please fix number one's mess.
He ****** me up bad.
But you listen to me.
You don't just write down symptoms,
And give me drugs when you tell me to leave.
Doctor two knows more about me than I do.

Take away number one,
She gave me number four.
I was a homicidal maniac.
My anger took over,
And violence seemed so lovely.
After some time this was all gone.
It did nothing to save me,
Didn't even try.
Doctor, this doesn't do ****.
It's left me drowning again.

Take away three.
Number four and five,
Now that's a combination.
Pill five stole my sleep,
And all desire to eat.
Food looked disgusting,
My heart beat quickened.
I couldn't stand still.
Now on four and five at the same time,
And starving,
I lost fifteen pounds.

Now add six.
Four, five, and six.
All at the same time.
What's happening to my body?
I've become a science project.
I felt all the chemicals in me.
Might as well have been poison,
Because six did nothing.
Like number four,
It didn't even try.

Take away four,
Give me number seven.
Now we have seven, five, and six.
It's too early to tell,
How seven will **** me up.
I don't feel human anymore,
Just chemicals with feet.
Seven, please save me.
Rose Jul 2018
my heart pounds
my butterflies rocket to the sky
my hormones are heightened
my throat constricts
how is it that i feel everything at once
delight.
contentment.
infatuation.
it feels surreal,
and it's all because of him.
the epitome of human art
i'm intrigued by every aspect,
every idiosyncrasy,
every flaw.
i want to be consumed by every part of him, to the brim.
i want to inhale the peace and serenity he brings,
i want to swallow his touch,
and never regurgitate,
i want to believe in the hope he's awakened in me.
i want, i want, i want.
but i fear.
fear the potential heartbreak,
the loss of excitement if he disappears,
i fear the depth of my emotions,
the abyss of "love" i always lurk on the edges of so idly
is it worth it?
to put all this power in his hands.
and in return,
shower him with the love my heart swells, threatening to burst, with,
and for once.
just once,
feel it back.
-v.la
TJ Dec 2017
my rabbit heart it pounds and pounds
I am tiny and frightened in the grass
they will catch me they will catch me they will catch me
catching means fury and pain
and something worse -
but I don't even know what

I have to
cover my tracks
I have to
run run run
I have to
freeze
hold my breath
pray
as my heart pounds
loud enough to hear

I make my nest
of chosen family
chosen interests
chosen self
and I dig and I cover
and I hide hide hide
throw them off the scent
have I said too much?
is it over?
do they smell the trail?

my rabbit nose can smell things and
my rabbit ears can hear things and
my rabbit eyes can see things
that lead straight to my nest

but my rabbit heart doesn't know
how much the foxes know

I imagine all the ways the foxes will smell and hear and see
and catch me, corner me
and I cannot escape
and it is not a dream this time
I am in their jaws and it is over

that is what my rabbit heart imagines
and why it pounds pounds pounds
one smell left out of place
and they sniff it out and come for me
and I am so small and so helpless

I am fast and jumpy
and that has saved me
time and time again
but what about this time?
when will my luck run out?

I am quick and clever
but they have teeth and hunger

-

what is it like
to not fear like this?
to have a lion heart?
to walk in the world
with something other than freezing and trembling
and a heart that pounds in fear

what is it like
to not even be a lion, no
nothing so grand
but a pet rabbit
who knows only safety
who is anxious in his nature
but has never seen a fox
never kept a nest of secrets
never been so close to death
just from a pounding fearful heart

I wish I knew
written 4th July 2016

inspired by Florence + The Machine's song "Rabbit Heart (Raise It Up)"
jeremy wyatt Mar 2011
Poor wee cat lost in the dirt
trodden on when wee and hurt
lived on worms and ***** things
insects crawlies all with wings
you fell lucky furry boy
found a family full of joy
hunted you until they won
took you in for love and fun
now you weigh a lot of pounds
your belly drags along the ground
but such a baby you're so sweet
rubbing all around our feet
"Dry me off then put some food
in my dish please don't be rude!"
I have to say that in my mind
a cuter moggie can't be found
If am born next as a cat
I'll be like Wilson soft and fat!
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