Monica Segeren Jul 2013

I had a dream about my Grandpop last night, 
To see his face
To hear his voice again 
Makes me miss him
Even more than I already do
I simply cannot express 
The numbness in my chest 
All I can is: 
I'm sorry for all I've done 
I hope that I'm making you proud 
Proud of who I am today 
I miss you so dearly Poppop 
It really saddens me 
Saddens me you're no longer here 

Ayeshah May 2012

He used to paint my nails.

He'd paint em

pinks reds and orange

he'd paint them blue

sometimes too

mostly black.

He'd make tiny daisy

flowers all around.


He used to put lipstick

on me

he'd trace my  out lip line

he'd use

black or brown liner

making them fuller

he'd tell me

they need to look fuller.


He use to dress me up

he'd get fishnet thigh highs

he'd have me step into

a mini dress

made of synthetic leather

zebra prints all around.


He'd follow with

a black tight

leather half shirt

gloves long and white

always would follow.


He use to do my hair

he'd comb front to back

for 45mins

it'd shine and glow

falling off my shoulders

cascading down my back

it almost touched my butt.


He used to put me in heels

he'd picked always the reds

I didn't like these red heels

I stood almost to his chest.


He used to tell me

to dance.

He'd say move my

hips like this

in a circular motion.


He'd say stand

  in the middle

on the dinning

room table

dance for me

he'd say
dance
for poppop.


He use to touch me

when I danced

He used to

touch himself too

I cried.


He'd become meaner

He'd say don't

make me punish you

I felt punished already.


He'd get undress

I'd cry louder

begging him not to.


He's slapped

my face

I always fell

I'd stand up

fast or he'd

hit me again.


He'd lay me on the table

keeping me trapped

in the middle

he'd fill me every night

I'd cry

He'd laugh.


He use to paint my nails.

(until my birth father shot him)


Always Me Ayeshah ®
Copyright ©
Ayeshah
K.C.L.N 1977 - Present YEAR(s)
All right reserved ®*

Valo Salo Aug 2015

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