Dude I need to *** so bad. I need to *** soooooooooooooo bad dude. Oh my god I need to *** Then go *** Lol dude I cant go *** Why not Cuz i have to write this What no just go *** No you dont understand if I go *** and come back I wont be able to write it anymore becuase I won’t be needing to *** anymore which is the mindset that this is in Wow now thats what i call a STREAM of consciousness LMAOFA, LOL, WHUWH, HLAOAALFHA,

I hate the way you hold cigarettes
and how you never drunk text me
at 3am. I want to be the person you
think of when a sloppy drunkard
is kissing you at a bar. His breath
rank with stale stogies, light beer,
and cheap whiskey. He uses way too
much tongue and swears his ****
won’t fit in a ******. He couldn’t
spell ******* and even if he uses
his fingers, it’s not enough to make you
***. I hate bad lovers and that’s all
I imagine you with. Dudes who say
“wanna play just the tip?” and other
lame *** **** because nobody ever
told them “ladies first” and you have
to stimulate the ****.

we're on a break,
meaning we catharsis ****,
often in public places,
often with an edge of violence,
much like the session in the
family restroom, here at
Big Daddy's Bar-B-Que (travesty, travesty).

still waiting for Em to to finish "tidying up."
and the brisket is salty.
or it's the leftovers from her forehead.
she should have cut her fingernails.
thinking of a way to hide the blood trails
running wild on the back of my t-shirt.
catharsis, she says. it's healthy, she says.
Elvis croons over the arcane stereo system
and a white-haired woman with gelatinous
arms taps her fingers on the tabletop along
to "Teddy Bear."
the waitress keeps a hawk's eye on my
half-empty/half-full glass of water.
and I'm afraid to take a drink.

here comes Em. she's an athlete. and we're on a break,
meaning we don't see each other's parents.
don't nod and listen.
and don't say things like, "oh yeah, your sister Sarah. how's she?"
hallelujah, hallelujah. Em played point guard in high school.
her last official sporting endeavor. but twenty minutes ago
she told me to look up a complicated position
via iKamastutra on my phone
because she's an athlete, and I'd be "amazed at what
this
machine [her body]
can do."

but I hate when she says **** like that.
catering to an I'm-almost-certain-peg
of my fantasy. harder, harder
and before I finish, she insists on
swallowing
and
it makes me uncomfortable
but
we're on break, and to argue
would be a crucifixion to this "vacation."

I think about Elvis.
and wonder if any
woman is still alive that
swallowed his ***.
and when it's down
to just one, does that mean
anything?

"well that was fun," Em says.
her mascara wasted.
the brisket is salty.
I take a generous drink of water.
I hear the sound of breaking glass.
the waitress has busted
a bottle of ketchup in her
rush to refill my 2/3rds empty cup.

"mazel tov," I say.

I like being in charge sometimes.

I want to be choked and spanked and ******* and ****** hard.

I want to wear a strap-on in bed.

I want to be used.

I think about spanking you until your *** turns red.

I want to be slapped and called a ****.

But I melt when you call me babygirl.

I swoon because you’re a gentleman.

I smile when you’re cute and girly.

I want to cuddle and watch Disney movies.

I like having hot wax poured on my body.

I like to play with the candles on the table at fancy restaurants.

I like ice too.

I like to watch your pupils dilate when I look at you a certain way.

I like when you look at me in that certain way that makes me lose my breath and giggle.

It calms me down when you call me owlet when I’m stressed.

You give me warm and fuzzies when you call me your best friend.

Maybe I like you.

So maybe this isn’t so complicated.

*Maybe it’s really simple.

If Daedalus built us a labyrinth

Of chambers with beds, and smells of mint,

I’d never try to leave or escape,

I’d stay with you, it be our fate.

-

Your enticing scented perfume,

Catches my nostrils as I gaze at you,

You glance back, seductive and robed,

Your shoulders revealed, the rest unknown,

Until a slight twitch adorns the floor,

With the garb you wore before,

Your lingerie lingers there now,

Across your backside and ***** endowed,

Your back is still there turned to me,

Morals become my enemy.

-

I walk slowly, creep behind,

I take your hips and you take mine,

I feel your nails dig in my sides,

Pain is not to be belied,

Turned around now, look at me,

In my eyes, what do you see?

Feel my hand gently stroke

That precious cheek of yours to stoke,

The fire that internally burns,

Inside ourselves, the passion churns,

My hand softly grasps your throat,

Your pupils widen, you are smote,

A short gasp, an inhale of breath,

I adore seeing your heaving chest,

Surprised, aroused, you grab my hair,

We break something beside us,

I don’t care, we don’t care.

-

Your *** in my hands, your legs wrapped around,

I put you on a table, throw you down,

You smile and bite your lip and look up,

Joyous repetitions of “****, oh ****”,

You bite my collar bone and shoulder,

I think “Oh, how I love to explore her”,

Pandora’s Box knows nothing of this,

I feel, as I hold down your hands with clenched fists.

-

To the chamber that promises silken sheets,

You and I alone, who needs “discreet”?

Sensual moans from my Aphrodite,

You call me Ares, and quiver slightly,

We've now become quite volatile,

You feel no need to hide your guile,

You bury my face a midst your chest,

Smiling lightly, pointing to your crest,

I serve you well,

As far as listening can tell,

You happily return the favor,

This moment in my mind, I’ll savor,

A fallen angel is angel nonetheless,

You look up and I must confess,

The sight of it, so great to behold,

That I stand you up, and around, and fold

You across the bedside chair,

Alas, the pleasure doth find you there.

I am yours and you are mine,

Behind our door records no time.

-

When I bend to receive a kiss,

Ah, the touch of your perfect lips,

Your taste, it’s addictive to say the least,

I cannot stop, your tongue can’t cease,

Then you recoil and I silently beg,

You then submit, and tighten your legs,

I kiss your neck, hear a deep breath in my ear,

You have the power of my mind to steer,

Your hands and nails find my back,

And then, in ecstasy, you attack.

What must be hours go by and then,

I feel from inside, your body tightens,

We are both together this moment,

There is a small flood after the levee’s exploded,

You lean back, dragging nails, and scream,

Heavy exhales as if we were breathing steam,

You lay atop, beautiful and breathless,

After all, we are quite reckless,

Feeding on our insatiability,

We lay here kissing awaiting re-ability,

We are lost in each other’s flesh,

And mind, and heart, and we both have fetched

A longing lust that took command,

Without daring reprimand.

-

This is Adam and Eve’s paradise,

Without The Apple, it will suffice,

This night feels as if it will never end,

We take each other again and again.

My heads pounding
My necks twisted amuck
think I'mma stop giving a ****
Light up a blunt and do what I want -
woah wait -
ain't that the **** that got me
here in the first place?
Worst case I nervously pace
the halls for a day - two or a weekend
Blasting the weeknd
Entire enviroment reeking
shrieking -
Nah -
I'm better than that.
Can't latch onto the past.
That's the trash that got
us there at the start - instead
I prepare it in art
And share from the heart, with you.
And you.
And you and you and you.
Because why not?
It helps forget about that pinebox looming-
Thinking outside the winebox lucid -
I mean Windex, clean em out
And a win decks, stacks paper chips
You can't say this isn't some matrix blips
I am not losing ****
I am manuevering this beautiful thing
up past this ******* Nuva Ring
Cause that's life - you can get beat
or keep it on a leash - jeez
that's sexist. I don't know
where this became an accepted
comparison, its embarrassing
comparing them - to K9's
But we hear it through the grapevine
Turns of phrase we make fine.

Babe, when I plow in and out of you,
palms holding your luxury buttocks
and lips on your bare *****
bodies moist in sweat and anticipation
in this low light, feeling a fleeting pulse
of your flowing hair is ecstasy, is ecstasy.
I'm a kneeling missionary of the gasm,
yes, the big O shooting to heavens.

Bow down.
Look up.
You addict —
consumed by a
human body.
Ideal to you.
Indifferent to me.
So, look at me.
Look at my *******.
Swollen.
Sagging conically.
Look, but don’t touch
Then, sharpen each square inch.
Pause at each nip.
Turn me around.
I make it easy to feast on my anatomy.
Shove your white fists
inside these delicate folds of skin.
Then rip me off my pedestal
and onto your lips,
so you drown ******,
choked by dust.
Your tongue
carving territory
inside a power-hungry *****.
Just another sculptor, shackled to art.
Such cold worship
granite cannot love.

Folks these days are either evolutionists or creationist while I kick back self-proclaimed suicidal ideationist.
       I've got bigger fish to fry than some issue with a racist, if politics were even crazier I'd be a proud pro auto-felatio-ist.
      But I don't like politics it tends to get people bitter and my ex-girlfriend ****** glitter.
     I'm damaged and you know I'm a ******* sinner. Still sitting at the table screaming where the **** is dinner?

Put it in a box and tell it you’re mine
Chain it up tight and tell it it’s fine
Make it wait. Make it shake.
Make it quiver. Make it quake.

Keep it dark. Full of despair.
Make it gasp for every breath of air.

Tell it don’t you dare —
Move and it might just tear.

Maybe even share
for a faire

to dress it up, dress it down
Make it smile, make it frown

With metal spikes to keep it still
Easy to use, ready to fill.
Into the morning and through the night
It should know better than to put up a fight.

12/28

I once caught a gaze that you deemed to spare me,
Your eyes were Andromeda, your hands adored me,
I believe you fell for my sardonic wit and charm,
And knowing my heart would do you no harm.
I was lead to your chamber and then,
It was as if I'd entered Heaven.
-
I smelled the rain from outside your window,
The petrichor and your graceful perfume,
Drunk with lust I stepped forward,
Hoping you were ready to be adored.
You stopped me and sat me down
On a cushion, then kissed my crown,
Then you backpaced with a viscious smile,
And danced for me and all the while,
I couldn't resist you, I didn't try,
If I layed you down, I wouldnt let you just lie.
-
Twisting to your intoxicating tune,
I couldn't but stare and watch you move,
Piece by piece, you shed your coverings,
And second by second, plucked at my heartstrings.
You stalked forward, my heartrythm cracked,
Sitting in my lap now, hands on my back,
It was so vivid, so real, so adorabley twisted,
The creatures in us, to feel, to visit.
-
Your scented bodice enticed me still,
Your lips were parted, nostrils flared as well,
Your eyebrows were arched and quite intrigued,
Your eyes showed me everything you wanted to see.
Avast, alas, a glimpse of the past
You move my hands to your chest and as
I grasp gently your hands go down,
They reach for what you need endowed,
Your fingers then trace the ink marks on my chest,
And then lay on my left side to feel beating breast,
Eyes, they're alive, they cast aside,
You then embark upon a wild ride,
My shirt you lift, my belt undone,
You bite my neck for the sake of fun,
I caress your ribs, your perfect skin,
I am the epitome of sin.
-
You turn around and tease me now,
Back arched and leaned against my chest, and how
You move so delicately and with all vehemence,
I want to know your passionate violence.
-
"To bed then my dear",
I hear you say,
"My darling, it would then make my day",
Your hand on my chest, mine around your neck,
You mount atop and in all bedecked,
In sulfurous longing, and hiding a biting lip,
You take me for a sensuous trip.
Arise, dear goddess, I know not this love,
It's new to me and all above,
Every ****** a moan,
And silence from  I,
I try so hard to please,
I love your breath and rolling eyes.
Faster rotations and deeper depths,
And then you seek to give punishment,
To a crawl you stop, slow and so shallow,
You are the siren that shall be hallowed,
Intensity and pleasurable frustrations,
But with a coy smile you spare me lustful aggrevations,
You return so slowly to increased mach,
In ecstasy, my thoughts all to you flock,
Nothing appeals like the words you speak,
Amidst a room so vastly bleak,
In my ear you gently ******,
The thoughts become real with no protest,
My, oh my, the night goes by,
And time lost is gained with you and I,
Never and forever hold no ground here,
I make you quake, I want to hear,
Hear the longings within yourself,
As I unleash all of your hells,
Faster and harder it comes to fruition,
Taking eachother until submission.

Babe, there's many kindsa cravings:
the vanilla kind, where young idiots
write about how they miss his
or her touch on their skins.
or the morbid kind, where another
lot lament how they'd rather die
than not see each other.
I'll tell you of this real and adult craving:
babe, I ******* miss my manhood
feeling ron n ***** up your moist hindside.
Babe, its a crack kinda craving,
the sight of which, beneath wet garments
and better yet, when parted
revealin that silly sorry slithery
gateway to the netherheavens,
this is the kinda crack, harder than coke,
that my adult craving craves, this
craving, babe, is for the real.

oh, baby, tonight,
the wind's a bit bitter on skin
tonight, the itch strikes
oh, baby i'd so love  
to plug all nature's loose ends
oh when you
crawl to me like that,
knowing you are all lubed
for me, tonight,
there's a crank that goes wild

He called her a **** at dinner
Told she could be thinner
Played the part of being an ***
Voicing opinions deemed crass

A waiter wandered up
Refilling a cup
Gave the girl a wink
But was more of a sporadic blink

Her date stood tall
And turned his fist into a ball
Told the waiter to **** right off
A comment muddled by a cough

Then, in an act of violence
Came a brief respite of silence
The waiter was struck in the jaw
Knocked on the floor captured in awe.

He was then beaten ‘til dead
Over inferences read
The woman screamed
At her date, the blood coated fiend

Police were brought in
The man simply grinned
Cuffs were attached
As the man’s might was matched

A month later
Due to the dead waiter
The man had his day in court
A bailiff acted as his escort

The man was sentenced to 15 years
The woman, in attendance, shed no tears
The man was taken
He appeared visibly shaken

Taken to a cell at Briar Field
A place all go to yield
He was beaten for days on end
By prisoners looking for time to spend

Searching for a sense of hope
Utilized in avoiding a knotted rope
The man found a friend
With a helping hand to lend

Then one day talking wasn’t enough
The man’s friend got rough
After a quick stich
The man was anointed a *****

Sitting for dinner he was called a ****
By his friend, who had become quite blunt
A guard came by and batted and eye
The friend asked if he wanted to die

Said this man was his slave
A poor ****-******* knave
The guard retreated
Victory conceited

But the friend pressed on
Until the guards life was gone
Then walked back after the stunt
And called the man a fat old ****

It's the finality of it all that propels me to run away,
and in my distraught cowardice I ponder,
just how many masks must I wear,
to masquerade my hatred, to hide my tears, to disguise all the fear?

Angels, and Demons lie in and around every thought,
and in my wrath, denial, and loathing,
I chase them away with the ferocity of a demon
rampant within a fog of ****** induced madness,

and yet that demon which remains; knows just the right words.

Her venomous static pierces the softest remnants of my heart,
the mask cracks, and my hatred erupts like knives, razors, and ropes tied in nooses;

I want to **** your daughter in front of your eyes,
I want to ****** everyone you love; while you watch in agony,
I ******* despise you.. humanity is filth, a virus, and a ******* disease.

I pour gasoline on my own humanity, and watch god's crinkled face
as I scrape a razor across my skin just to spite his entire ******* existence,
just - to - spite - my - own - existence..

I slowly burn it all away, burn away all that matters, and all that I love..

I ******* hate it all!
I want to destroy it all!
I want to consume it all!
I want it all to end in a fiery blaze!

I want humanity to writhe in the same diseased agony that engulfs my heart
piercing it like millions of red hot razor blades..

I want to destroy every last bit of compassion,
every last bit of purity left in humanities already blackened hearts,
and as I watch as it all crumbles to the ground in it's insignificance,

I can only laugh.

Not arsed about your journey in.
You’re boring. It’s 8:30am
Aassault by tedium
Boring-*******-story.
Your daughter’s thirteenth-birthday-buffet.
Where’s my ******* pepper spray.
Don't care about your weekend love.
Where's the ******* get out clause  
******* about the pork pies and
Pass me the ******* tranquilse

She breathes against my neck. It's a slideshow of sounds growing and falling around me. I don't know where it's coming from. Her skin slides against mine like we are a piece of machinery, working towards the same goal. Keep moving, keep moaning. Her hips bucking and my hand over her mouth to keep anyone from hearing us-- from entering our world. The wind is knocking at the window, trying to throw us off. I grab her chin with my hand as the other grabs at anything it can reach. Her eyes are blurry. They have a hard time focusing on mine. Are you scared, baby? I'll go slower. I torture her. Make sure she's paying full attention. Make sure she's losing her mind. Her body makes waves against mine. We lose ourselves to each other and the wind keeps trying to get inside.

Hey, TeleCheck:

                                              T
     ­                                         H
                      ­                         I
                                         te  S  le

When your nothing to nobody
and you just want to be something to somebody

Same intro as before but please bare with me…
You see that moment was enough
If only you knew where my mind was prior to yesterday
It’d surprise you I swear
The demons I've kept in captivity as we laughed and sang
Even I forgot they existed for a moment
Sitting above the clouds
Cruising in my ride
A beautiful girl at my side
Her smile was everything
Her silly *** ad-libin’
But it was natural and simple
It felt so rejuvenating
and of course thoughts ran close to the borders of NSFW
As quick as when I stepped into her home
And had a chance to admire her **** physique
and how good her **** looked
on her slim little frame
Ravishing señorita
She knows I’ve got my eye on her
like something I desire
But time is critical to a matter such as this
A coin flips and like a hit switch
The light fades
Darkness reigns
And she can’t seem to take control of the thoughts that rage
Lately, I’ve known the feeling
I guess this is why I stay late and write rhymes such as this
And I love the influence you bring indeed
But I will always be respectful to what you need.
I just hope that she sees
What I’m saying ain't’t the same
Blunt or not
Today I was satisfied
Knowing I made her smile
and the only thing that would’ve made it better
is if I was singing those words into her ear as we danced
and our bodies intertwined like a moth to the flame
as the music consumed us…

Because there’s nothing like feeling wanted
When you’re told you’re worthless
By the same people you call family
Or when the friends you defend
Have you feeling ashamed
For calling them exactly that
A friend
but lately,
History is all that chains us
But like Ksan say,
It might be time to cut them off
And it hurts more because we’re supposed to be brothers
But that doesn't seem to matter to all of us…
I apologize if that’s none of your concern
I wouldn't want to waste breath on something you fail to care about
Don’t mind tho,
I’m forever the lonely poet
Trying to gather an audience of peers
To hear me speak
because I figure maybe its what they seek
I’m just searching for the ones that these words may reach
as they read this speech
and realize
that in life,
there is always more than meets the eye.

THIS POEM IS NSFW

read at your own risk


The dream
I had
last
night
Where I walked in
With only lab coat on
And langier
I see you
Where cleaning up
After an autopsy
I went up kissed
You
And pulled
Me closer to you
And take my
Lab coat off