I don't love you that way anymore.
Why?
I am not sure but I don't.
I am stricken  with fear that won't,
Be aware  of things that I missed with us together.
Many Years gone like  an old football that lost its leather.
You have done this to my heart as if it were a change in the weather.
Walking away like you just watched a movie.
Leaving me without a catch of anything but sorrow.
I am supposed to move on ,with all my emotions.
Because your happy now, and that is your only notion.

Al Melaskev

My home is bare, with no love to share,
My heart is lifeless for I have become wifeless.
The job was taken and may have break’n the love
Of the marriage and the wife, she has left the carriage.
With her heart she said she loves me but her face tells me I’m
Ugly and lost in sadness that can only be tragic.
She is still my magic; I love her deeply my heart can not
Function with out her near me.
She is happy and that is great, I am losing everything but
Weight. I eat my sorrow and need money to borrow to keep my self from
Giving up the morrow. I have no friendship which is my fault I lose them all with out
A cause. I must change to keep her close which mean my job and life must become toast.
I have to lose all that I am and change the way that so I can stand again with her who makes me happy.
I want her to see me and her not feel ******. I have reduced her life to this because I didn’t take care of her with desire instead, I let our love expire.

The heart is homeless but not the body, the body lives in empty house and the heart is hostage like a trapped mouse.

Al Melaskev

Repressed and Depressed

I am alive but don’t like living
I feel that I am only giving
Life has become an odd existence
Because I am afraid I give too much resistance
I do not let others inside for the fear of losing all my pride
I fear to lose all I have but I drive away those that want to give
I feel worthless I feel ashamed that I cannot just reclaim the happiness that
Is inside behind the wall and foolish pride. I try to give to others first as long as I
Am not close to them I can manage to always help them when I must open to others
My mind always tends to shutter, I close off to world missing out on all who care only so that I don’t have to share.
My inner thoughts are seldom good they often tend to create dead wood.
I cannot say that any one should care for you see I will not want to bare my thought because I lack the
Idea that I am worth a friend’s appeal.
I do not like to think about all the friends that I close out I blame the lack of connection on others unwillingness and connection.
But as I ponder more and more I see that I am need to open up my door and let my friends and family in so I can live and not die within.


By Al Melaskev