"masochist" poems
Fear makes no sense
it doesn't matter what fear
Fears don't define weather
you are brave or not
weather you are reckless
Or *********
Fear is not,
as some think,
part of your instincts
of survival of self preservation
It can destroy you,
turn you into lil' pieces
Apr 5, 2014
Apr 5, 2014 at 10:54 PM UTC
it's the management
here to inform you
your lust has been hacked
we know what your thinking
what you hide
we are all up in your business
like cyber terrorist's
don't ruin your life with to much self respect
we are all watching you **********
to mamma mia meets a hundred shades of crimson
and fight club blood ****
while you ***
screaming
ooooooooh god
licking
holes and poles
like a pig at a trough
praying to be handcuffed and on your knees
sweating and hysterical, a red moon struck **** face
high on drugs
in a dream better then this life has to offer
life is full of yogas
***** pony position
bouncy bouncy
i'm the light in your darkness
i know what you do
i want pieces of you, you wont show anyone else
your sickness, is my own
you are my love slave
turning me *********
who loves to hurt you
who's the *****
who's the switch
your flawless
now
cry me a river
move a little bit faster and to the left
your **** is a cartoon
**** grinning emoji
bleeding shrieking
fu fu fu fu *******
your brains running out of your eyes
gimmie all your venom
***** movie poem's
*** tongue and *****
your mouth like hemoglobin jewelry
saliva diamonds
kiss that
you'll never go back
squealing smooth heat
breathing winds of perfume
love and pain
united by
tragedy and desire
by
the grotesque and the beautiful
like thirst holds stones
stop crying
you know baby
you look your best on the toilet bowl
shameless
a delicious little *******
that holds me close to life
like a baby to the womb
please
stop banging on the door
i'm using this stall
Thank you
The Management
Sep 22, 2018
Sep 22, 2018 at 11:43 AM UTC
Silly little *********
spitting up her heart
Wishing she was talented
Wishing she was smart
Slice and bite and beat yourself
all above the knee
Never swim and never cry
then nobody will see
Stupid little *********
tearing out her eyes
Punishment doth bring success
Perfection carries lies
Tell them all it was the cat
Conjure up some cheer
Fill your life with silent screams
then nobody will hear
Crazy little *********
cutting up her wrists
Pushing down with all her might
as hands turn into fists
Blood is pouring out your veins
and you stop to stare
Knowing if you died tonight
then nobody would care
Dec 25, 2013
Dec 25, 2013 at 2:32 PM UTC
Graffiti, Graffiti, Graffiti
Being bled onto
The landscapes between thighs
Incarcerating women's wombs
Justifying men's genes
Foreigners appropriating
Women's and men's sexualities
Losing the power to be
When changing our roles' long overdue
Gendering our words and attitudes
Man, who taught you to be a chauvinist!
Woman, who taught you to be a *********
Don't put your god in gendered bigotry
Do man's emotions feminize him?
When will women freely carry torches!
What gender do you assign this voice?
What gender do you assign this words?
Will the masses even understand these choices?
Don't worry, my sexuality won't infect you
Criminalizing sexuality
Placing it front and center, implying that's all I am
Graffiti, Graffiti, Graffiti
Being bled onto
The landscapes between thighs
Graffiti, defiling the masses not high classes
Because men and women of society
Full of stride, take pride, in their gendered hyde
Graffiti, defiling the masses not high classes
Ignored hoods, barrios, countrysides, ghettos, projects
Devouring women's and men's bodies
Younger and younger people falling to HIV/AIDS and STDS
Vaginas receiving the violence, wombs bringing misery
LGBT youth ****** into fire
Lost males (in mental chains) ****** to assert their manhoods
Graffiti, Graffiti, Graffiti
Full of dangerous chemicals, being sprayed onto
The landscapes between thighs
Attempting to legislate our stories, without warrant
Jan 29, 2013
Jan 29, 2013 at 10:06 PM UTC
I don't care what people think
If I am a ********* or a fool
I want to say I love you.
Even if you can't love me
the way I do cause you love her
I'm just a fool falling for you
But I am not asking
For you to love me back
Because you can't
I'm sorry from being brat
But can't help it I'm jealous
Even if I have no rights
Cause your not mine to loose
And it kills me every time
Facing those facts though its hard
But its okay at least you are smiling
I prefer it than your your tears
Maybe I'm not meant for you.
Maybe I'm meant for someone
Maybe I'm destine to love you
Just to knew the meaning of love.
That the books can't explained
It is from a personal experience.
I want to thank you from that.
But before I could get over you
I just want you to know.
I love you even if you aren't mine.
Jan 9, 2015
Jan 9, 2015 at 4:57 AM UTC
More blood drawn for no apparent reason.
Things may be okay, but I am not.
My body will be my canvas, that nobody will see.
My scars will be a masterpiece, but only in my dreams.
I want the pain.
Or is it pleasure?
Since I get so much joy from the crimson blood forming on my thigh.
I am a *********
I want it, I need it.
Nov 8, 2014
Nov 8, 2014 at 8:19 AM UTC
Would you kindly
hug me tight
with your hands
around my neck?
Would you kindly spend the night
and comfort this nervous wreck?
Could you show me a smile
while you tell me that I'm trash
Could you insult my lifestyle
without even batting an eyelash
Should you care about garbage like me
your tastes must be perverted
Should I be allowed to feel this happy
honestly, I'm uncertain.
I need you to use your claws
to draw out the blood from my skin
I need you to break through the walls
I built to hide my true self within
I need you to split me open and dig inside
to grasp at my heart if you can
I need you to know the thoughts that I hide
and love the person I really am
Oct 25, 2017
Oct 25, 2017 at 4:14 AM UTC
I could never know just how dangerous being a lamb is until I fell for the lion.
He could easily snap me in half, mentally, emotionally.
He is all predator, cool calm and collected.
All harsh lines and sharp tongue
All confidence and cockiness
But the way he moves, so beautifully
It breaks my heart.
And I am the sick ********* that can't bear to let go,
I would run if I wasn't so busy being caught up in him
So busy wanting to put him back together
Because he wasn't always a lion, wasn't always this.
He was a cub once, a smaller version of himself now
Lesser and more
But I will fall asleep tonight thinking of his roar
And what it does to my heart
Not afraid, but utterly transfixed
Stupid, stupid lamb
For falling in love with the lion.
Sep 22, 2015
Sep 22, 2015 at 11:50 PM UTC
don't waste your breath
telling me to get better, talk ***** to me
don't hold your breath
hoping i try to help myself.
if you're going to hold my neck
hold it a lot tighter than that,
don't forget to push down
on my windpipe with your palm,
we're wrapped up in these bedsheets
because i want you to hurt me.
i want to see the rope burn on my wrists glisten
where it's begun to tear away at my flesh
and i like to feel real tangible knots
when i'm tied up in self loathing.
i struggle to find the line between
lovesick and depressed or
being a ********* what's the big difference.
either way i wake up with bruised
blue lips and oxygen deprivation,
and fresh linens wet with singeing liquids,
and a pain in my stomach or lungs that means
i'm still breathing slightly.
i wanted you to **** me.
Sep 12, 2017
Sep 12, 2017 at 4:39 AM UTC
slave is someone who does not have authority over their own lives slave is someone subservient controlled dominated by somebody something slave works very hard for little or no pay slave is property of somebody something slave is someone forced to obey
sycophant is someone servile who overly flatters more powerful individual for personal gain sycophant is bootlicker brown-noser fawner flunkey doormat lackey lap-dog yes-men parasite toad-eater (pause reposition) somebody possessed of excessive vanity may cultivate sycophant swarms
side by side they stand clothed in black not quite similar the one slightly taller possibly because the other suffers poor posture perhaps they are related because in odd way they appear alike or of same ilk yet upon closer scrutiny it becomes apparent they have very little or nothing in common the taller one with troubled sad eyes the other smiling obsequiously the taller one more muscular ***** from working menial labor the other with curved spine slumped shoulders because of undue bowing and crouching while blowing smoke up other people’s *****
sadist is someone who attains ****** gratification by inflicting physical pain shame to other people sadist is someone who delights in excessive cruelty degradation to others
********* is someone who achieves ****** pleasure from being hurt humiliated abused dominated punished often self-inflicted ********* is someone who enjoys being harmed misused mistreated ignored by others
sadomasochist is someone who gets ****** gratification by alternately or simultaneously enduring hurt causing pain to somebody else sadomasochist is combination of sadistic masochistic tendencies in someone who obtains ****** pleasure from inflicting submitting to pain cruelty
sycophant slave snakes up leg of movie actress dictator who gains pain through pleasure 2000 miles from equator IED cell phone detonator sycophant dilettante ***** up to sadistic art critic or publishing editor on escalator while below on main floor of shopping mall ice rink figure skater pirouettes bows to nominator surreptitiously bribed by infiltrator mutilator
Feb 27, 2011
Feb 27, 2011 at 4:38 AM UTC
I'm writing this poem to be ignored
like many of you
I enjoy being a poet
of keen irrelevance
a literary luminaire
of solitude
a lost writing ghost
a megalomaniac haunting himself
a waiting oracle
waiting
for the occult muse door mouse to tap dance
whispering night babble
or having a cooked chicken fly into my mouth
while i take searing snapshots
of erratic images
puzzling them into words
from boundless burdens
of heaping intestinal bluesy aftermaths exodus of conscience
bruising my self like a ********* in heat
on out of control run-on rants
and blood razor drenched mysticism
while real men drive earth movers
drink bruskies
and kick ***
hustling time share Chinese handcuff contracts
and up sell social justice platitudes
fit for pie in the sky levitating hysteria
lives shatter like red ice
in endless cacophonies of skull clobbering effacement
I'm writing this poem to be ignored
and no one lets me down
Mar 20, 2019
Mar 20, 2019 at 3:32 PM UTC
We are polar opposites
You are West, I am East
Our views always contradict
You have a sweet tooth, I don't like sweets
You are white, I am black
Not literally, but just in life view
Sometimes you're ***** white and I'm clear black
It varies from half empty to half full
You are an extravert
While I am an introvert
You like being surrounded by people
I'm fine being secluded in the darkest corner
You're frank and always true
I lie so no one will have a clue
But you always know what I hide
While I am oblivious if you're really fine
You are a cat-lover, I am a dog-lover
It rain cats and dogs when we're together
You sing the sweetest meow at my whimper
I happily wag my tail at your purr
We both like music though
But we listen to different genres
We never even shared on one earphone
So sometimes we just endure the silence
You are a sadist, I am a *********
You leave bite marks on my skin
Whenever you're overwhelmed
But I'm really fine with it
You like Vampire Diaries and Victoria's Secret
While I like TVXQ and anime
We'll never agree on a TV show
Now who's gonna hold the remote control?
You are a clean freak
I am not that very clean
You're probably next to Godliness
While I'm second to the last in that list
You are very hardworking, I am lazy
While you are being busy
I'm being a potato on the couch
"Sweep the floor.", you said as the broom flew on my face, "Ouch!"
I like food trips
But you are on a diet
You like to eat healthy
I like to eat anything but veggies
True, we don't have anything in common
Except for the dislike of the black part of the fish's meat
But we are familiar of our demons
And the how-tos for its defeat
Yes, we must be polar opposites
And yes, we're like magnets
Positive plus negative
To each other, we are attracted
I am salt, you are pepper
And we complement each other
We are each others' puzzle pieces
Completing each others' emptiness
We are yin and yang
We cannot live without either one
And most importantly, you and I
We rhyme
Jun 15, 2015
Jun 15, 2015 at 11:27 PM UTC
I am the catalyst of this cataclysm
the catastrophe that impaled
the atmosphere
of this vagabond heart
that is shaped like a sphere
and an uncertain future
being build out of fear
that gets bypassed product
of my cynicism.
Secluded in my lab
concocting a potion for this illness
and when all else fails
call me the alchemist
nothing more than an
angst-ridden antagonist
my apologies to the pessimist,
my excuses to the optimist
I was born to be a *********
with a heart made of silver.
Buried in my bunker
trapped in someone else's lore
which in turn makes me the catalyst
of my own downfall
I was baptized a Catholic
without ever being asked
turn me into a Cyclist
and I'll pedal real far
turn me into a Scientist
and my lab coat will leave my side
turn me into a labyrinth
and you won't be able to find
traces of me, of who I was
or who I never came to be.
Dec 26, 2009
Dec 26, 2009 at 3:00 PM UTC
You got under my skin,
and ripped my heart out of my chest.
You lit a match against my skin,
and then stayed to watch it burn.
* I still cross continents for you.*
Apr 25, 2014
Apr 25, 2014 at 11:12 PM UTC
My Darkness is what makes me
I embrace let it taste me
Down to the abyss
Death my favorite wish
Naturally a killer
Life is just a filler
I hold the cards what should I deal you
So dark feel me wicked
See a knife I want to twist it
Sadist or ********* either way I am gifted
You will never see me
You can even be me
My Darkness seeps into the scenery
Serial killer nah I'm much ill-er
My Darkness is primal I am a sealer of fate
Death Note set the date
Allow me to demonstrate
Villain mastermind
What I am can't be defined
Dark so lovely go ahead try mug me
Eyes behold what's beautiful is ugly
Call me a sinner I'm not a beginner
We can play a game there is no winner
So let My Darkness take you
Devour remake you
Heaven will never miss
The devil in my kiss...♏
Feb 19, 2014
Feb 19, 2014 at 6:08 PM UTC
Fought
One, Twenty-two skidoo.
Cantankerous mad filamous
She,
That of her,
Me.
Piñata, stretched balloon
Over my big fleshy
******
Tea and cakes,
Painted my nails
Painted my lips
Like candy.
Gold trinkets,
Pour like mercury out of my ear.
Ouch! I cried
My feet in hot sandy
Dreams.
Flying peacocks tickle
My *****
Oranges roll on chalk board tables
Over stale rye bread.
***** dribbles out like mucus
And a runny nose.
Toilet paper and rusty water.
********** on you.
Stocking lover.
Fetish cover.
Woman pusher.
Mellifluous ****
Look at my skin.
Pink, beige, peach, red
Porous, greasy, bacteria ridden hide.
**** me like seppuku,
Smother, suffocate me with
Red jelly jam.
Lubricate your finger with black
Cancerous ash.
Stick it in my naval,
Unravel my umbilical cord
Like so many filaments of my heart.
Tear your flesh
You auto *********
Rip your liver
And force feed it
Corn and maize
Hay and grass
Emory my nails against
Red barn walls
Until bare skin fundamentals
Kisses with salty lips
Inflame my ravishing
Pig stomach.
Kick my shin you
Everything,
Wake up you stupid
*****
Void can be blue skies,
Oceans call for suicide.
Kiss me with delight,
Raspberries tattooed
In my *****
Strawberry cream
Vanilla, milk,
Ponderous infinity,
Cotton, dough
Honey and sage.
Caustic gastric
You and not me.
Feel my legs,
Touch my thighs,
Lick my lips,
Give me anything
Not direct.
Tie me up in complexities.
**** my head up.
Put me in a dream,
Make me happy.
Blair Butterfield 2004
Jan 11, 2010
Jan 11, 2010 at 7:09 AM UTC
Cursed to this life
Everything pre decided for me
My happy and sad
My hate my love
We’re all just displays of skin and bone
Most with no souls
Crying about their five dollar latte
What should I wear today
Release from our lips sin and beauty
The sickness and desire it is going to take me
Hearts cold as ice freeing me from these emotions that are destroying me
Impaling metal and plastic just another facet
New to you another defect I see
Deep down my heart is still beating wishing my blood was seeping
Oxygen in everything wishing it would leave me
Break my bones putting chemicals in my veins
Once forever but nevermore
I’m in a sea of green and blue
Wishing something would set me free
Only pain pushes me to maintain
Step into my shoes just look see for a minute
Just a warning you will never come back the same maybe insane
Gold dust coursing through me never allowing me to feel the pain
With blue lips please just poison me
Mar 19, 2019
Mar 19, 2019 at 3:03 AM UTC
I keep the shower window open
In 20 degree weather
There’s somethin’ about feeling
The freeze and burn together
Fusing two halves,
Fueling one desire
Steam pries at pores, like
Needle nose pliers
Winter exploits wounds
Haughty exhales through
Diamond ****** wrist cutters
Cascading
Cherry brandy drain water
Licking ankles purple
Branding Frost’s musings
As my final verse
Fire, ice — whichever comes first
Duality be ******
I favor efficiency
I’ll marvel as *********
At the sadist who takes me
But know that, once
Is all I can endure
And of this, I am sure
Dec 12, 2018
Dec 12, 2018 at 2:02 AM UTC
The cannibal is thirsty
for a flesh martini
Dabs of salt here and there
On tongue and ocean groin
The ********* is hungry
To be the tender olive
Eaten very slowly
Lick the ****** pleasures
Of each other's
knife
kiss
Maternal affections
pouring open by God's rage
They are
shelter
Ignition
To each other's
demons
wonderfully delicious
as frosting or
whipped
cream
They are rare fruit, indeed
What are the odds of them finding each other?
Just goes to show, my lonely lovers
There's someone for everyone
You too
Will find
Your soul mate
Someday
just as the blood
Will eventually
Drip
from
the cannibal's
smiling
mouth
Oh my love,
you are my
yummy chicken bone
dipped in
your
sauce
"Ahhhhh...." he says
"This must be love."
Mar 27, 2013
Mar 27, 2013 at 1:53 PM UTC
i want to peel the skin from my limbs
strip by strip
with broken glass making jagged incisions
then watch the blood drip
down my body
dark red is pretty.
i want to scratch my eyes out
i've seen too much now
they'd look better splattered on the floor
just like ***** blotched decor
i want to pluck my nails out from the beds of my fingers and toes
and with a torch burn it all, melt the cartilage off my ears and nose
its too much extra baggage
for when i jump off the ledge
i like to mutilate myself
i’m a ********* as well
i love slicing deep into my skin
or puncturing myself, with a needle or pin.
seeing my blood escape captivity
makes me feel more alive than if it was still inside me
even more so when i carve out an artery
it falls so gracefully down to my feet
i want to display my own bones in my home
and replace them in my body with metal poles
i think feeling pain is better than feeling nothing
and seeing a sharp razor to grate my skin is always enticing
i love how it stings.
blood is the liquid of life yet symbolizes death
i corrupted my soul, now an expired body is left
i want to reach inside my chest
and grab my heart
and squeeze so hard
it oozes like jello through my fingers
and stops beating forever.
Nov 20, 2022
Nov 20, 2022 at 7:54 PM UTC
The best poems are all about
loss and pain and suffering.
It feels more natural to write a poem
about a long lost memory,
Or a love that never worked.
Poets aren't allowed to be happy.
They’d run out of material to write about.
The words
content and happy
in the same sentence as the word
I'm,
feels like your tongue
never sitting right in your mouth,
like teeth getting in the way
when making out
like an itchy throat,
not going away even after coughing a fit.
The phrases
You are and my boyfriend
can't be a real sentence
like how
unicorns and fairytales
don't exist.
They just feel like
two jigsaw pieces
from different parts of the puzzle
forced to sit beside each other.
The word love
just doesn’t resonate
with the beat of my heart.
Maybe because
my heart stopped beating
a long time ago
and my brain had to carry the workload
so I think twice as much as I should
synonyms?
I overthink.
I may be the only poet
who doesn’t want to be happy;
a ********* clinging to heartbreak,
and loss and pain and suffering.
because it’s easier to let heartbreak
wrap myself in its familiar arms
than to experience an adventure
with happiness wrapped in mine.
Oct 31, 2017
Oct 31, 2017 at 6:18 AM UTC
I must be a *********
For falling in love with you
And you must also be a *********
For loving me too
Of all the types of self harm
You were the sweetest
And when I wanted to shut everyone out
You were my one weakness
And you must be a *********
For trying to pick up broken glass
But I am not a sadist and I won't let you
Hurt yourself whenever I crash
Apr 14, 2014
Apr 14, 2014 at 8:46 PM UTC
i've been kissed
by a sadist
who holds my hand
and guides me softly
to dramatic
pain
at his hands
i've been held
like a child
so fragile
i could be dropped
or broken
with such ease
and no fight
i've been kissed
by a sadist
who hurt me
so fully
so hatefully
that i don't
quite
catch on
under his spell i wait
and wait
for love to greet me
like it once had done
the kiss
of the sadist
burns my flesh
exposing the weakness
underneath
but i always return
to the sadist's touch
the sadist's
kiss
the sadist
because i love
his love
and his love
is my pain
the kiss
of the sadist
makes me
a *********
Nov 3, 2017
Nov 3, 2017 at 8:41 AM UTC
I used to be a cheerful girl
My friends when I was younger described me as "jolly"
But I grew up as a *********
I explored the world of pain, I traveled the road of sorrow
I cried myself to sleep and woke up with heavy bags under my eyes
One day I realized I was depressed
I even became suicidal and my friends didn't like it of course
They wanted to understand me but even I couldn't understand myself
Sure, I am surrounded with the people who care about me
But maybe, I am better off alone
Alone in my world where I won't bother anyone, only myself
And now I am isolating myself, keeping everything in private
Having Facebook for academic purposes only because apparently, ultimate self-expression is not allowed there anymore
Having Twitter and Instagram and other social networking ***** I mean sites, just for the sake of keeping the memories
But really, if I wasn't very sentimental, I would have deactivated every single account I have on the internet
The cheerful girl that I used to be is trapped inside the sad person I have become
I've been choosing happiness as much as I've been fighting depression
It's true that one's self is responsible for making decisions but in my case, it's not because I chose to be like this
The mess I have become was beyond my control
"Choose happiness, fight depression"
Sure, sure. As if it is that easy.
IF IT WAS EASY, I WOULD HAVE DONE IT ALREADY.
I hate myself.
For being weak.
For being a coward.
For being so stubborn.
For being stupid.
For being myself.
Will sorry ever be enough?
Can being a human be an excuse?
Will my depressed self ever find that cheerful girl?
That girl who used to have a lot of dreams
That girl who used to live life to the fullest
That girl who used to laugh all the time, even at the littlest things
That girl who used to have such a big heart
That girl who used to be happy
Or maybe, just maybe, she's just really... gone, gone, and gone.
Jan 21, 2016
Jan 21, 2016 at 12:57 PM UTC