Oh my dear friend molly,
How I love you so.
Always there for me,
Oh sweet molly
A your voice is a drug.
Makes me feel comfortable
Like my sweet friend maryjane
All you need is to spark her up
Shes on fire
Makes you feel worth living
I always hang out with maryjane with friends
Even alone
My mom likes her
My family doesn't
My mom hates molly
For a reason unknow
Maybe because she almost killed me
Molly killed my cousin
I miss her but molly is nicer
Makes you happy right?
My cousin never did
I met maryjane when i was 13
Best day of my life
Happy
The happiest i had been in months
At a party is where i met her
Maryjane is my bestfriend
She introduced me to molly
I blame her sometimes for that
But then i hang with molly and i love her
Molly is fake though
Always nice when shes with you
After she makes you feels bad
Like you need her all the time
As if you cant live without her
Oh sweet maryjane never does this to me
She knows ill always come back to her
But molly has a price too
Makes you happy but then harms you
Please leave molly i cant continue to live with you
Maryjane my savior is the one i look up to

Take me down that yellow brick road
I want to see all the broken people
searching for solace in those old stones.
One by one they wander through
smokey air and blood stained eyes
in search for the place where no one cries.
Sweet Maryjane won't you be my guide
traveling through space til
I've lost my mind

She kisses me sweetly
I kiss her back
I break her to pieces
But she still gives me love
I shove her in a glass bowl
And inhale
mmmm
Exhale
She embraces me
She fills me with magic
Makes me feel unstoppable
I know that when I'm gone
She'll bring me back
I know that when I want to get lost
She help me get away
She'll stay with me until the end
Wiping my tears
Holding my hands
Through the Years I know I'll be sane
Because I have my love
My MaryJane.

Thank you for all the late-night talks;
Long insightful walks.
For always being the one thing that kept me partially sane;
When my whole world thunders and rains.
I appreciate all the laughs you have brought;
The shenanigans that thankfully  weren’t caught.
 
Thank you for being my rock MaryJane;
Though my love for you may seem bitterly arraign.
Most of all thank you for controlling my anxiety;
And keeping benzos from being a life’s priority.
No matter what you always knew how to make me feel better.
For that I dedicate you this thank you letter.
 
I value all the friendships you have bestowed in my life past these years;
Especially the ones no longer here…
I am not saying the  only good people in my life are because of you;
But **** you have brought good company through.
You introduced me to old souls;
Never drove me from my goals.
Many have stated their opinions of you:
I don’t care though; to me you will always be true.
After all these years;
I am almost in tears.
You have always been by my side;
Always along for the ride.
I temporarily must part my ways;
Because the legal system claims our friendship is not okay.
To me you were more than ***;
You were my **** rock.
 
Thank you MaryJane.
 
-C. Jackson.

self realization struck painful and fair
i was wasting my life going nowhere
and with the fresh pain clarity came
to better myself i'll never be the same

Share the love like wine, get drunk with the divine, spread your kindness like kisses on your lovers behind.
Put on your magic coat, get lost with princes as frogs croak. Be beautiful and stop time, your lovers hand is yours and mine.
Pretty little girl lets take it for a whirl, back eddies of galactic swirls, your heart dazzles as mine twirls.
Shining lights so bright, making moves on the moon's night. Here in good company, our hearts echo like an orchestrated symphony. Staying put in the lime light, keeping time cause our moods right.
Jumpin Jack goes over the hill, Jill tumbles as our hearts spill, kiss me girl, lets seal the deal. Making loves like magic, you just have to know how it feels.

Your sticky and moist on my fingertips,
I pull you apart to push to my lips.
My tongue follows the folds of your skin,
Becoming light as I hold you in.

Dancing with you burns my desire,
Bringing me close as you hold onto fire.
I Taste you as I exhale so slow,
I feel your touch as you come and go.

Rolling my fingers over your paper skin.
Holding you close as I breath you in.
I pull on you for one final kiss,
Searching in you for something I miss.

Returning again and again to **** the pain,
Just me, myself and MaryJane.

my aunt,
my beautiful aunt,
my hippie aunt.

the one who gave me a jar of sand and shells and whispered, "don't ever open it, or else the whole sea will spill out".

my aunt who smokes joints and offers it to the birds.
the one who sings on mountain tops, and tells me about her trips.
"i could hear my skin cells whisping past one another",
'parmel gantry they said, parmel gantry i echoed'.

the one who told me her whole existence is based on the fact that a furniture truck delivered a sofa to the wrong house.

my aunt who said when her daughter was young,
14 maybe, she would sneak off and see maryjane.

she said she was on her way to Woodstock,
but her brother, her brother was a cop in new york,
and he 'kidnapped' her,
told her "no, the closest you'll get to those ***** hippies is through this television in the attic."

"but he made me dinner every night, it was wonderful" she said,
"i hadn't seen him in years, we really bonded."

"i had a scholarship to upenn, he didn't want me to lose it"
but she dropped out one week in and moved to oregon.

she married on a commune, and her housemates threw rose petals on the only bed there.

and when that was over, she married another by the same name.

and i've never seen someone laugh so much.
i've never seen someone so happy, so genuinely happy.

I spent some time with a good friend of mine, whose name is Maryjane.
She helps me to get through the stress, and dulls some of my pain.
When I feel so upset from life that I just cannot eat,
I pack a bowl, light it up, inhale, exhale, repeat.

Then something magical happens, I think about food.
The way that it tastes when it's swallowed and chewed.
And I make weird creations that shouldn't taste right,
but thanks to my green friend I eat every bite.

A grilled taco sandwich with mustard and cheese?
As long as I'm ******, I'll say "Yes, please!"
A hamburger pie with ice cream on top?
If I've smoked enough, then I'll eat it up.

I love my dear friend, because she always sets me right.
She levels my head and gives me a manly appetite.

Oh drink that wine
Before it makes you go blind

The feeling is just so fine
What should I do about the brine

Oh I think I feel pain free
There's got to be another way

The pain is so strong
Why does the pain have to be lifelong

Mary Jane said she'd be back
She lives across the tracks

Wine is legal
Such a shame

Cause maryjane kills the pain
Helps to cure the brain

Cause they wanna do a frontal lobotomy
Which will release the pain sounds so unreasonable

Don't play like that
Curiosity did **** the cat

Sounds so out of whack
When will Mary Jane be back

While I wait I'll drink my wine
Remain on cloud nine

And as a lesson from my wonderful and wise sister, Tonya, I'm going to list a few things I'm grateful for:

My family (sisters, my brother, the dad I got to have, cousins, aunts, uncles, nieces [Naomi and Maryjane] and great friends)

My furry pals (all the pets I have and all the amazing animals I get to care for at my job)

The fact that I have a full time job and therefore, a roof over my head and food in my belly plus the bellies of my animals

My health. The fact that I can walk, run, drive, see, hear, smell, and feel

My life. The gift I was given by my mom and dad. The ability to bring creativity and joy into this world.

My creativity and art. Not everyone is given the ability to draw, paint, sculpt, sing, write, play music, and sew.

My voice. I'm so thankful to live in a time and place of free speech. I have so much to say, and if I lived in a time or country where saying whatever I wanted was unacceptable, I don't know what I'd do.

I'm thankful for many things, and I'm going to make sure I think about new ones every day.

I'm grateful to have all of you in my life, as well.

What are you guys grateful for?

After all the keys of *******,
conversations of heartbreak,
swigs of liquor mundane,
and kisses from Maryjane
I swear I can drive home.
Numb, thinking of Love--

Snapchat your toys when we hang.
Won't reply to my love when you see my name.
Everytime you come back to visit
by the Murrieta cold mist,
you hold my hand and kiss my lips
like you're sick of it.

You told me you still got it for me.
But Girl, why do you dance when I cry?
Been around the beds at the UC
so give me meaning to why I still try.

I'm begging Honeychild,
****** of my eyes.
Dangerous with your lies--
****** to the real stuff,
Couldn't understand my love.
I'm begging Honeychild,
Show my you still got it for me.

I'm out in South County
driving under Orion's belt.
Call you when my drunk heart is for sell again.
"Please, please drive home" you told me,
Suicidal tendencies control me.

No more drugs,
no more driving like the street has me sprung.
But of the bumps that clumped my vision,
and drugs that sunk my conscious,
you were the worse
saying Novacane was yours.
A sad song, why can't you see I'm the one
feeling numb
on the ice cold lawn,
while you're filming ****
with no red light on.

Its lonely at this time of night
i think about the woman i wish i could have in my life
maryjane has had a hold my time
im ready to let her go now.

To explore some new territory
Alive and Awake maybe she will notice me
if not at least ill have a hold of me

Welcome to AA. Also known as Addicts anonymous
Well, hi I’m Jetzael, and I have an addictive personality. But you can call me jet. It started about 4 years ago with small things.
You know, from the things I ate to the seats I took.
But then my addictive personality escalated to people. But let me explain to you how my addiction with people worked… or works.
Itll start of by needing to take a glance at you. That would fulfill my high. Then I needed a simple hello until I needed a hug, a conversation, lunch every day, a seat next to you, it never stopped! My addiction with you never stopped, it just kept growing.
And when my high wore off, you didn’t get out of my head. What were you doing? Were you happy? Did you need something? Are you mad, sad, frustrated? Are you okay? … am I okay?
All I could ever think about, was you.
And we all know here, addictions never end in a good high.
So it got to the point where my questions turned from were you okay? To was I ever gonna be.
I went through the withdrawal. All alone. All the restless tearful nights until I got high again. Not by you though. But her name was oxycodone, with her friends Percocet and codeine.
They became my best friends. They always distracted me from you until I got tired of them, because you… pff… you gave me highs that codeine could never. But then came along all the restless, nauseous, and chilly nights until they all got out of my system. Why? Because I was growing an addiction for you… again. Would you still like me this way? Would you support my ways? But the one question that kept me up all night was, did you still love me?
At least just a little bit?
But then my old home-girl came through, Maryjane. And numbed my mind away from all the questions and thoughts that existed about you.
She would smoke me out every day, before the sun was even two minutes into his 12-hour shift.
We would be numb the whole day so I never had the chance of thinking about you. Couple of months went by, but if you wanna be exact, my addictive personality could tell you how many months, days, hours, minutes and seconds it was. But that’s unnecessary.
I mean, all my highs were starting to let me forget your scent, touch, words, even your face.
But then you crossed me again, and all those things I thought I forgot about you, rushed back into my head faster than any other drug that existed.
So here I am again, craving highs, not from oxy, perc, codeine or marijuana,
but from you.

You taste like miscarriage
Back pain is free hugging
It's never been so clear how the walls are white
This room has two mirrors
None of them talks about medications

Your nose seems to know how kindle to the eyes the air is
It tastes like green chili
Or an itch on the back of your neck
You haven't shampooed in months
Stirred stomach

Maybe that is how she talks about the abortion
You hand me two roses
They have never had thorns
Last night I was throwing up tulips
Throat sour like some smile

Your tongue tastes like daddy
Lifted from chest
It was a surgery
You wish it had failed
They found Jesus instead

It is not chest pain
It is just enough that it tastes like pickled her
Bring the jar to you
I'll bring the jar to you
It is blended with your scalp and last Saturday's meal

It has never been so clear why the floor is white
This room has two lamps
None of them knows who Maryjane is
As we are so white as the pipes
I am going to the bathroom

Tomorrow you'll be fine
Just not today
Just keep holding on for tonight
Just repeat this day after day
Tomorrow you'll be fine

The needles in my arm make you disappear.
The high goes down and I'm out of here.
Snow dripping in my throat.
The taste of you makes me choke.
Tabs take me on a trip far away from you.
Needles erasing my memory of everything you do.
Snow numbing the "I love you" as I bite my tongue
Maryjane wraps me in embrace
She helps me forget the way you taste.
I'm leaving this place.
I shake. I shake.
My heart just breaks.
Of all the drugs I've used
You were my biggest mistake.

nostalgic
for the honest ****
bathroom floors in friend's apartments
ten dollar bleach kits
orange tint
drinks and joints lit
feeling it now
drunk and confessing my sorrows
high anxiety
because
things come back and bite you if you're not careful
be aware of what you confide in strangers
and
I'm telling myself constantly
to appreciate my privacy
because I always get stuck regretting
the minute after letting someone in
and
back then
it was so easy
the early and mid 20s
lucy changed me
molly made it carefree
while maryjane remains centering
I wonder what you're wondering
are you wondering about me?
no one has ever wanted to know
why it's hard to love me
they only want to know why it wasn't easy
and then leave
some days it's still lonely
pity party planner of one, no need for an RSVP
I know it's only me
in my head, sort of drowning
wandering antique stores, buying stranger's found things
there's magic in the history, sadness in the poetry
rust and broken seams
take my heart strings
pluck them from me
I'd like you to try harder to please me
gotta turn off these ******* feelings first
I forget where this is going

My best friend came along unexpected.
we just ended up talking even though we hated each other at first
My best friend had my back. she made sure to stand by me every time.
My best friend put my pieces back together when I didn't think it was possible.
She came in and saw my bruises and ****** noses.
She saw the tears at night and pain in my eyes
She was there.
She helped me
when I had no one and felt all alone
she was my person.
She had patience when I was wasn't the best.
she had love when I had none
She had faith for the both of us when mine was running low.
She picked up the 90 when all I had was 10
and she still does to this day.
My best friend is gods blessing to me.
My best friend is Maryjane.
Yep that's her name
and shes my best friend
shes my sister.