"loko" poems
Kaibigan 'yan ang tingin mo sa akin,
Kailanman di mo ako kayang mahalin.
Di ko ninais
Boom panes
Sa samahan na nabuo natin, ako'y nabihag mo,
Subalit di mo naman sinabi na ito'y isang malaking laro.
Iniisip ng iba meron tayong relasyon,
Ang hindi nila alam ito'y isang ilusyon.
Umasa ako ng "tayo",
Ngunit ako'y nasaktan lamang,
Sapagka't ikaw ay may kasintahan.
Di kita masisisi kung iba ang iyong pinili,
Dahil maski ako di pipiliin ang sarili.
Sa mga sinabi mo, ako'y naniwala,
Kahit na may iba akong hinala.
Ganun pa man, ako'y nagtiwala;
ngunit ito'y iyong sinira.
Di ko alam kung saan magsisimula,
Dahil ang puso ko ay wasak na wasak na.
Akala ko iba ka,
Yun pala katulad ka lang nila.
Akala ko noon ikaw ay maginoo,
Yun pala ay isang loko loko.
Pinagmalaki kita dahil sa iyong mabuting puso,
Di inaasahan na ako ay maloloko.
Ako'y nanghihinayang,
Pero para sayo balewala lang.
Ganyan ka ba kamanhid,
Di mapansin na ako'y nasasamid,
Tuwing nakikita kayo sa paligid.
Masakit na makita kayong dalawa,
Pero wala na akong magagawa,
Dahil masaya ka na sa piling nya.
Gusto ko ilabas ang nararamdaman ko,
Pero ayokong makita mo na ako ay apektado.
Gusto ko magreklamo, gusto kita murahin,
Pero biglang napaisip, ito pala'y isang sariling katangahan.
Mar 3, 2016
Mar 3, 2016 at 9:36 PM UTC
Ano ba? Nakakatawa!
Ano ba? Nakakainis na!
Ano nga ba tayong dalawa?
Nalilito na ako sa kung ano nga ba
Ano nga bang ang kaibigan?
Hay nako, aakbay-akbay na...
Ano ba ang iyong mga ginagawa?
Ano nga ba ang aking ginagawa?
Ano nga ba ang mga kalokohan nating dalawa?
Mas maganda na hindi na lang tayo nag-usap.
Mas ginusto kong nakikita na lang kita palagi,
Gusto kong masaya ako na walang masama sa huli
Mas ginusto kong makita ka na lang sa maskara mo,
Sa maskarang **** bawal tanggalin.
Kaibigan mo nga ba talaga ako...?
O laro at loko-lokohan lamang?
Oo, itinuring kitang kaibigan dati,
Oo, kaibigan nga ang ngalan ko sa’yo.
Hindi ko napapansin ang puso kong
Nahuhulog na lang bigla sa ating mga ginagawa.
May mga kaibigan kang babae?
Akala ko ba ako lang. Hahaha.
O ano? Nagseselos ka na?
Gusto kong kasama ka,
Mag-isa lang tayong dalawa.
Tahimik pero maraming kalokohan.
Ano ba tayo? Laging yun ang tanong.
Isang tagahanga lang ba ako sa aking idolo?
Isa ba akong kaibigan na kinaiinisan mo.
Minsan mas magandang mag-isa sa malayo.
Yung hindi ka nakikita pero naaalala...
Oo, malungkot. Wala namang taong naging permanente.
Pero ang mga bakas nila sa aking puso,
Nakabakat parin, dinadaluyan ng aking mga luha.
Baka bukas, hindi na ito maging normal.
Kasi baka sa susunod na mga araw,
Iba na ang depinisyon ng masaya.
Masaya akong nakasama rin kita, aking mahal na kaibigan.
Napapaibig ako pero ang mata ko’y nakamulat pa.
Kasi alam kong hindi ngayon.
Anim na taon na ika’y mas nakatatanda.
Pero kalokohan nating dalawa ay pambata.
Minsa’y hindi mo na maiintindihan pa.
Oo, sumosobra na rin ako, noon pa.
Ano ba ako sa’yo? Kasi kaibigan ka sakin.
Ano ba ako sa’yo? Iyong tagahanga lamang ba?
Oo, mas ginusto ko pang hindi lang kaibigan,
Pero mas ginusto mo ata akong kausap mo lang.
Gulong-gulo na ang isipan ko.
Sino nga ba ako sa'yo?
Nakakainis na lang minsang hindi ko mapigilan,
Ikaw. Ikaw. Ikaw. Puro ikaw.
Mga litrato mo, nasa phone ko. Puro ikaw.
Pero nakakapagod na magmahal...
Ng mga taong hindi mapapasa'yo.
Ano ba! Ano ba!? Ano ba!?
Apr 2, 2018
Apr 2, 2018 at 7:58 AM UTC
'Di ikaw ang tipo kong laro
Umayaw na kasi ako
Sinubukan ko na kasi dati
Ayon, talo lang lagi
Pero heto na naman ako
Parang tanga ang loko
'Di mapigil ang ngiti
T'wing naiisip nang ang balat mo'y dumampi
Pucha, totoo ba?
Na-SS mo nga ba?
Taena, mukhang ako'y na-stun
Ng walang kalaban-laban
Langya, GG
Hindi good game, kundi gagi
Diba humindi na tayo sa sakit?
Ano na naman 'to? Wooh bakit?
Noob na 'ko eh
Weak, walang silbi
'Pag eto sa wala na naman nauwi
Sarili ko lang pwede ko masisi
'Pag in-game
Please wag mo na ko buhatin
Aasa pa sa GM ang tanso na manok
Pa'no, marupok
Mabel, pasensya ka na
Hayaan mo, ang 2019 ay papasok na
Baka lumipas din
'Pag hindi, patay, "I have been slained."
Nov 9, 2018
Nov 9, 2018 at 3:20 AM UTC
I.
Pangalawang pagkakataon?
Karapat-dapat ka pa ba para doon?
Matapos **** saktan ang damdamin.
Ganun-ganun nalang ba ‘yun?
II.
Hindi mo alam ang dinanas kong hirap,
Habang ikaw, hayun at nagpapasarap.
Ang hirap mabuhay ng wala ka,
Dahil sanay na akong nasa tabi kita.
III.
Pero pinilit kong tumayo para mabuhay!
Sinanay ko ang sarili na wala ka,
At lahat ng pagkalimot nagawa na.
Pero ang sugat sa puso'y naghihilom pa.
IV.
Matapos ang isang taon,
Landas natin ay muling nagkita.
Akala ko lahat ng ala-ala'y wala na.
Akala ko nakaraos na ako sa sakit, hindi pa pala.
V.
Iiwasan sana kita kaso braso mo'y ibinuka,
Para tayong nagpapatintero sa kalsada.
Pagkat humihingi ka ng sandali,
Para makapag-usap tayong maigi.
VI.
Pumayag ako,
Kahit alam kong masasaktan lang ako.
Kahit alam kong 'di pa kaya ng puso ko.
Pumayag ako!
VII.
Bakas sa mukha mo ang pagkatuwa!
Dahil sa wakas masasabi mo na,
Kung bakit ka nalang nangiwan bigla.
Aaminin ko, ako rin ay nakaramdam ng kaunting tuwa.
VIII.
Pero hindi ko yun ipinahalata,
Sapagkat, kung iyon ay iyong makikita,
Marahil ika'y umasa na pinatawad na kita.
Mali! Maling mali!
IX.
Napa-usog ka bahagya at nagbuntong hininga pa.
Napahawak ka saking braso, tumingin sa aking mga mata.
Sinabi mo lahat ng dahilan kong bakit ako iniwan,
Ako ay naliwanagan sa iyong mga tinuran.
X.
Humihingi ka ng pangalawang pagkakataon,
Pero hindi ko yun ganun-ganun.
Tugon ko'y: “Aking pag-iisipan” at umalis na lamang.
Hinabol mo ako’t sinabing: “Mahal kita 'di kita kinalimutan.”
XI.
Hindi ako sumagot at sa paglalakad diretso lamang.
Pero alam ko sa sarili kong mahal pa rin kita.
Alas dose na at diwa ko’y gising pa,
Dahil sa aking naaalala ang ating muling pagkikita.
XII.
Napag-isip-isip kung dapat pa bang pagbigyan kita.
Kahit na alam ko sa sarili kong mahal pa rin kita,
Nagdadalawang isip pa rin ako baka masaktan na naman ulit ako.
Hanggang ngayon naguguluhan pa rin ako.
XIV.
Dumaan ang dalawang linggo,
At sinipat mo na ako sa bahay ko.
Halatang nasasabik ka na sa isasagot ko.
Niyakap kita ng mahigpit sumigaw ng “Oo!”
XV.
Sa una'y nagtataka ka pa sa kinilos ko,
At hanggang sa unti-unti kang nangiti.
Dahil naliwagan na ang loko.
Matagal ko ng pinag-isipan 'to at “Oo” ang sagot ko.
XVI.
At dahil mahal pa kita, hindi ko na natiis pa,
Hindi sapat ang mga daliri ko kung gaano ko,
Lubos na pinag-isipan ang isasagot ko sa'yo.
At magmamahalan tayo muli, sa pangalawang pagkakataon.
Jul 18, 2015
Jul 18, 2015 at 1:01 PM UTC
May yosi at may asap
Blankong tingin at sipat
Salamin na pang loko
Kulang sa balbas pa no.
Nag aaral ka pa ba
ang tinanong niya sa
Isang batang maliit
Oo po, sagot ng paslit
Parang karaniwan lang
Kung hindi natuluyan
________
Cigarettes and clouds
Blank stares on looking
A fake mirror and guise
Given away by a lack of ****** hair.
"Do you still study"
He asked
The small boy
"Yeah", said the young one.
As if it were normal
Should he say no.
Feb 4, 2014
Feb 4, 2014 at 8:47 AM UTC
Loko ndzi tihanyela andzi hanyeli nwina ndzi hanyela xikwembu xamina.
Loko ndzi famba miri ndzina matsolo yontswontswana,xana amilava ni fambisa leswi milavisaka xiswona ndzi tshika leswi hosi yindzi endliseke swona.
Loko ndzi khongela miri ndzi twa ndlala,xana ndzinga tshika kukhongela hosi yamuna hikwalaho ka nwina.
Ndzi tisomele tintombi nwina miku ndza oswa,amolava ndzi soma nwina ,mitaswivona leswaku ndzi soma hirirhandzu kungari Ku huha.
Xana ni endliwa yini?
Xankoka kanwina iku vona munhu axaniseka,leswaku mitaba swikhiyana minga heti.
Ebo mhe na ala,ndzi nge pfuki ndzi ni yingisile.
Loko mindzi vona ndzi hundza hi ndlela mi yimbelela tinsimu ta michongolo,onge hiloko mondzivona ndzimu vhevhulela.
Amilava ndzi titshova tshova bya vanwambhurhi kona mita tsaka ,Mina andzi fambeli kutsakisa munhu ndzi fambela kufika laha ndzi yaka kona.
Xana mindzi endla yini.
Andzi dyi swanwina ndzatitirhela himavoko ya Mina,nwina miendla onge vatomihakela.
Ndzi tshikeni ndzi tihanyela Mina.
Xana mindzi endla yini.
Ndza engeta nakambe xana mindzi endla yini?
Nov 29, 2015
Nov 29, 2015 at 1:59 AM UTC
A party in the jungle heat,
he is sober,
Like always.
*Just one drink...
Come on try it...*
No.
One, please, do it with me
No
Don't be left out
No
Just one...?
...no...
One.
Capitulation First Sip.
Fruit juices of the jungle- strawberry sweet with that telling aftertaste
no regret.
Sip.
Gulp.
First cup finished
He is Tipsy.
Secnd cup finshed
He is Buzzed.
Pride, He has lost his inicense, He is growin' up.
The only limit is dere are none...
Three cups in and the sweet nektar is gane,
One half a Loko next – grawss.
The world tips.
One half a wutr botle goes very fastly - no flavor at all
The world blurs,
Cut to couch 3 am
He tiiirrrred, He fulll, He is full-on drunk.
For the first time in sixteen years, he is a wining-confused-inarticulate baby.
Pillow on his face to hide from the lights- not the shame- just the party that needs to be over
He wants sleep, but the spins keep him awake.
The rumors abound: "He assed out on the couch."- not true.
Alcohol fueled lie.
Alcohol distorts perception far worse than a few rumors can hope to encompass.
Alcohol turns your average teen into a
Thrill-seeking
Death-defying
Lady-killing
Frisky-living
Idiot.
Jun 16, 2013
Jun 16, 2013 at 2:00 PM UTC
'Di ikaw ang tipo kong laro
Umayaw na kasi ako
Sinubukan ko na kasi dati
Ayon, talo lang lagi
Pero heto na naman ako
Parang tanga ang loko
'Di mapigil ang ngiti
T'wing naiisip nang ang balat mo'y dumampi
Pucha, totoo ba?
Na-SS mo nga ba?
Taena, mukhang ako'y na-stun
Ng walang kalaban-laban
Langya, GG
Hindi good game, kundi gagi
Diba humindi na tayo sa sakit?
Ano na naman 'to? Wooh bakit?
Noob na 'ko eh
Weak, walang silbi
'Pag eto sa wala na naman nauwi
Sarili ko lang pwede ko masisi
'Pag in-game
Please wag mo na ko buhatin
Aasa pa sa GM ang tanso na manok
Pa'no, marupok
Mabel, pasensya ka na
Hayaan mo, ang 2019 ay papasok na
Baka lumipas din
'Pag hindi, patay, "I have been slained."
Nov 6, 2019
Nov 6, 2019 at 3:15 AM UTC
In this world of constant change, where all things shatter,
Love, too, succumbs to fate, like the falling matter.
From high to low, all rises fall, gravity's hold supreme,
Leaving us to ponder, what's the purpose of this dream?
What's the point, I ask, of embracing love's allure?
Today, you were absent, and my heart felt unsure.
Before my weary eyes, I witnessed a tender sight,
Two souls, enraptured, frolicking in the evening light.
Their joy was evident, as they shared a playful kiss,
A secret world they cherished, a passion they wouldn't dismiss.
But love, they claim, is magic, with hidden tricks concealed,
Give me a single reason to believe this truth revealed.
The art of life, they say, elevates desires and dreams,
Including true love, where nothing's as it seems.
Just like you, dear Akalu, I long for company,
Yet I stand alone, amidst stars, in infinite mystery.
Awaiting a fictional lover, hoping for a guiding hand,
You understand my plight, in this desolate land.
Loneliness engulfs me, a lost soul adrift,
Circling a crush who never notices my existence's gift.
Akalu loko-loko, we both yearn to be complete,
To find a love priceless, with hearts firmly bound, sweet.
Someone to catch us when we stumble and fall,
A companion to withstand gravity's daunting call.
But unlike me, dear Akalu, you bask in the sun's embrace,
Its radiant light ignites you, casting a glowing grace.
My faith, once steadfast, has faltered and waned,
Leaving behind a sorrowful journal, a garden untamed.
Dec 29, 2018
Dec 29, 2018 at 7:18 PM UTC
Here I sit with bile in my throat and music fading in my ears.
Once again trying to find the right words to make it better
This time I'm afraid there's no way to make it better only to explain
I'm slipping away, becoming who I left behind years ago
It's like a drug, watching the world turn into blurry chaos.
Just this morning I'd ****** up beyond belief before six am.
Passing out drunk on my front porch, waking up to my keys in hand.
Wondering how I got from across town to here and how long it'd been.
Climbed into my bed and faded away to longing thoughts of you.
I wake up to a pounding in my head and fuzzy memories of the night before
I remember taking my first shot of fire water and the burn it left in my throat.
One shot turning into a couple, my four loko getting lighter and grabbing her *** outside
Doing more shots of fire water and jack daniels, eating nachos so I could drink a little more
She went to bed and he took me outside, he kissed me against the car
My protest falling silent against his slightly sweet lips, bittersweet lips
Stumbling out back, trying to clear my head and his hand hovering to catch me if I fell
Asking if he liked getting hit by her, if he liked the way she treated him, what made her so special
His answer hot and hungry against my lips, I remember wishing you had the same passion
The guys laughing from inside the garage, laughing at us, his sigh in my ear
Dropping the doobie, looking for it and finding myself face first in the dirt laughing
Walking off trying to get away before I drank anymore, walking down the street
His voice, calling me back to the house, his hand grabbing mine and telling me I was safe
Telling him I wasn't that I wanted to go to the park, that Daddy would meet me at the park
Him saying Daddy would meet me at my house on friday but that I had to come back inside
The last thing I remember is hearing her sobbing, saying that I'm her best friend, that I was too drunk
Then I woke up on my porch, cold and holding my keys for dear life, he must have dropped them off.
All I can remember now is how much I love you, how much I want us to work, how much you care
You are my rock, my drug, my sense to this world. Without you I just mess it up.
Sep 14, 2013
Sep 14, 2013 at 1:44 AM UTC
I am sorry I tried calling you that one time
when I was drunk off lonely and whiskey and Four Loko.
It’s just that your hands were so good at keeping
me together. My body still sometimes collapses into the shape
of your mouth. I am such a soft, malleable thing, and it has taken me
too long to realize that you are also this. More important,
that you are more than my memories. That you exist free
and independent of my life. That my idea of you that crosses
my empty highway mind is not you. And with this, I am so sorry
for all the nights I tried to split your heart open just so
I had a place to rest. I did not understand how you were no
longer me anymore, how the you I had in me was a postcard
and not the city. Forgive the fury, the angry prayers tossed towards
the dark of my 3AM ceiling that were meant for your neck.
You were asleep that night where we started to break, and my skin
felt taut and sunburned, so red and wanting to scream, but Cassidy
told me that it makes sense why this was so frustrating. The rusting
of four years should make me mad. It meant I cared. And I still do.
And I still get the urge to hollow my arms so you can fit better, you
this new person who has grown and loved and spilled over into
a newer night. I forget so often that I can’t carry you like I once did,
and that you don’t know how to hold me anymore.
Even now, I’m still apologizing.
Nov 2, 2015
Nov 2, 2015 at 10:31 PM UTC
took his bike to the end of the street and disappeared.
he was laughing.
maybe today, just find a way
to bell the bones of magnificent fun.
she thought he was funny. he
took to the day like a wild oat.
took a bullet to the chest, still had long to go.
that old bless of a naked always-stretching lung
[can we account for nuance?]
took. took. took.
holocene compounded, brain aneurism expounded.
he knew the city suffered, city slumbered, never, not ever.
your number? he asked her.
or about some kind of snake wrapped around the heart.
war chest, drum the chest, bone or breast.
twas rhythm, not explosion.
rhythm/blast.
city/socks/electronics.
the humdrum conundrum of *** thumbs and time.
we are surrounded yet alone.
****** yet liquid.
remember the lung?
city/shoes/blood.
he thought she was funny.
stoop, stop to think about a text…
send.
Feb 25, 2020
Feb 25, 2020 at 7:07 PM UTC
I know I’ll always love you
Both of you
She is my other half
And you are my home
Our breath is one
Our bodies
Submissive to the chemsetry
We are one a temple of new hope
A trio of the gods picking
Nov 11, 2018
Nov 11, 2018 at 10:21 PM UTC
This dream was so real...
The Man
The Legend
The Legendary Drunk Poet Hisself
Asks to see my poetry
Tells me to bring wine
*Dont Forget the wine ************
So I drive over in my El Camino
&
Bellbottoms
Only I’ve got a can of Fruit Punch
12%
Alcohol
Instead of a bottle of wine
As Hank requested
you have to make the reader jump off the cliff with you in your first line, otherwise there’s no point
sip
good God! What is this?!
I’m thinking he’s gonna be furious
But he takes a deep pull
Knocks out half a can
Looks at it
Fruit Punch eh?
I show him my stuff. He likes it. Some of it.
No more poetry for the day man. Say, let’s go to the beach. Huntington or Hermosa. Grab another can or two of this amazing concoction
I tell him they have it in Lemonade
Peach Black Cherry...he lets out a smile
burp
It smells like Fruit Punch
*Well Come On **********
He talk in rhyme the rest of the day...n just like his words have told me about souls
The free one is rare...but you know it when you’re around one because you feel great and beautiful yourself when you’re near one
Mar 22, 2018
Mar 22, 2018 at 6:50 AM UTC
Berni chalo ler chieng
jiduto gombo bedo kodi
jolweny thao
jogoro goro
jo chwecho chwecho
poets ndiko
jogedo gedo
Ruothi nindo otamo
jothumbe gocho
chuo matek tek tho ne herani
erani loko chuo joneko
kona gima onego atim
Jan 12, 2020
Jan 12, 2020 at 10:27 AM UTC