for all the names on that granite wall and many others...

I  Prelude

Vietnam broke my mind.
Now it runs like a cheap watch
always leaping about in time.
It pulls me backward into
strange visions of a world gone mad.
My life is time borrowed from corpses.
It is hard to lead your life
while you are stuck in another.
Time, the great healer,
only seems to make this worse.
Self-medication, legal meditation,
nothing seems strong enough
to stop the pounding of the rotors,
the screams of the men and the monkeys.
I have never been able to **** the demons
hidden in the tree lines of my mind.
Forty-three years later I'm still hiding
nauseous and naked in the napalmed jungle.
But my high mileage body clings to life:
the quest for immortality knows no shame.
Now I am a poet drunk on words,
stumbling over the illusion of art.
The more I know of language,
the less I understand life and loss.
And still the mortars rain down
in an eternal, inescapable monsoon.


II Place

Imagine a land that smells entirely of ****.
Only 70 miles wide in some places.
I flew above the abandoned bases of a war
that had been abandoned as well.
Places given up to the jungle
where 60,000 Americans died for nothing.
An implacable enemy that had fought
the Japanese and French before us
and had no doubt they would prevail.
A very beautiful place seen from the air
if no one was trying to eradicate you.
Skinny children, old women, many ******.
A place where real tigers might well
leap from ambush and eat you alive
and snakes so deadly that once bitten
you only got two steps before death.
Breathtaking sunsets and sunrises.
And the possibility of doom everywhere.
Rice paddies, mountains, triple canopy jungle.
Gorgeous beaches and an ocean laden
with sharks and sea snakes for company.
A place where death picked his teeth and smiled.


III Action

Stark terror is the mother of combat;
the rage of Peleus son Achilles
drives the soldier into the filed teeth
of impossibly horrible situations.
Not for America or the Stars and Stripes
but for the man next to you
whom you probably didn't even know.
Never ask why one man dies
and the one beside him lives on.
I shot an NVA regular from 20 feet
with a Colt Model 1911 45 automatic.
Got him exactly in the chest.
He looked very surprised to be dead.
I was surprised I didn't miss.
At An Loc a Huey 20 yards from mine
loaded with 18 hopeful human beings
took a rocket up the *** and
disintegrated into a debris cloud
of metal fragments and pink mist.
No bodies to be bothered with,
no pieces large enough to identify.
A CIA officer executing the wounded.
A tame **** torturing his countryman.
The exquisitely horrific moment when
you know you are falling, not flying.
The partner cut in half by a machine gun
five feet from where I stood.
Do not try to make any sense of this.
Fall back on the mantra: *don't mean nothing.
Cling to that and you may stay sane.
Apparently, God was busy for ten years
and never bothered to visit Vietnam.

IV Comrades

Forget that band of brothers *******,
we were more like a desperate rabble
with no one to count on but each other.
Sometimes a brother shares the blood
in your veins; sometimes you know him
by the blood that flows from his.
You scream, you curse, you try so hard
and he dies like a huge baby in your arms.
Vietnam was a club you could only join
by being there deep in the ****.
Now we are old men but our memberships
will never expire until we do.
And who will remember us then.

V Aftermath

Treated like lepers, we slunk home,
each to do the best he could.
Many died in the denouement of
drugs, alcohol, homelessness, suicide.
When I got home I wanted to be alone,
to be with people, lots of *****,
but only with no emotion attached,
an ocean of Jack Daniels, lines of coke,
mountains of ***, electro-shock therapy,
calm sleep without nightmares
and sometimes the comfort of a quick death.
Not much different than most I think.
Saigon fell. Don't mean ******* nothing.
Only some of us remember and want you to know
so you won't be fooled again.

Imi soptesti vorbe dulci, in timp ce-ti ascuti spinii,
Ca prin vraja ma atragi printre portile gradinii.
Si se-nchid in urma mea cu un scartait incet,
Soarele dispare-n zare lasand cerul violet.

Eu te caut fermcat printre atat de multe flori
Ce ma incanta si m-atrag cu ale lor calde culori,
Frunzele fosnesc in juru-mi, in explozii de ecou
Tu incet prepari veninul in amurgul indigou.

Si pasesc increzator, nestiind ca o sa m-ataci
Fiindca asupra ta vegheaza o armata de copaci,
Si ma zgarie si-mi par un sinistru labirint
Luna imi ghideaza calea cu a ei raza de argint.

Stralucesti printre frunze atragandu-mi privirea,
Caci mirosul tau ma cheama si-mi ineaca gandirea,
Inima-mi tresare tare fiindca tu-mi promiti saruturi
Inauntru o simt *** bate simultan cu mii de fluturi.

Si imi canti incet un cantec intr-o liniste de gheata,
Insusi labirintul verde se trezeste usor la viata.
E o lume de poveste, totu-mi pare ca-i un vis
Tu sirena din adancuri, ma atragi inspre abis.

Simt liane *** se aproapie, si se incolacesc pe mine
Si ma trag tot mai aproape aducandu-ma la tine.
E de ajuns sa te privesc si raman pe loc lovit
Simt doar inima *** bate, caci in rest am amortit.

Nici medusa insa-si cu ai ei ochi patrunzatori
N-ar putea sa ma inghete si sa-mi dea asa fiori.
Cu niste lanturi cuprinzi intreaga mea fiinta
Impietrit si fascinat eu privesc cu neputinta.

Ghimpii-ncep sa ma intepe  si in carne isi fac loc
Simt veninul *** patrunde si *** sangele ia foc.
Caci cu cat m-apropii tot mai mult tu ma ranesti,
Si in crunta-mi suferinta tu continui sa zambesti.

Sfaramat in mii de cioburi, ma atarn de-un fir de ata
Doar prezenta ta himera ma mai tine acum in viata.
Insa tu dai drumu lantului, si ma zgarii violent,
Din atatea rani deschise veninul se scurge lent.

Naucit ca sunt iar liber, tremurand m-am ridicat
Chiar si ghimpii tai uscati, eu incet i-am scuturat.
Doar in inima au ramas, caci mi-e frica-n lipsa lor,
Viata incet mi se va scurge printe gauri s-am sa mor.

Simt un foc adanc in suflet care arde irizat
Si cu infinita lui ardoare, ma consuma infometat,
Caci te vad acum mai clar si incep sa realizez,
Ma ranesti doar stand acolo desi eu ma-ndepartez.

Nu sunt ghimpii ascutiti ce m-au stors usor de sange
Nici veninul tau fierbinte ce din vene mi se scurge
Nu-s nici vorbele otravite ce le spui tu cu blandete,
Caci desi nu vrei s-o faci, ma ranesti prin frumusete.

READING

Thank you President Obama
For putting on a show
You do the best you can, I know
That's why I'm a big fan
For this country, you own the plan
I will answer the phone
You will protect me and my loan
It's time I make a stand
You are the ruler of this land
I'll pray to God above
That everyone gives you love

(2pac talkin)
You know what gang violence is, mostly
And the people don't want you to hear this
Somebody shoots your family member
So of course you retaliate, You know what I mean
Same thing the you. S does except nobody even shot their family members
You know, they see that, somebody bomb a school
And all these people get killt
So the united states feel like ooh that's messed up
We gotta go show em who tha real killers
This country was built on gangs, you know
I think this country still is run on gangs
Republicans, democrats, the police department, the fbi
The cia, those are gangs, you know what I mean
The correctional officers,
I had a correctional officer tell me straight,
We the biggest gang in New York state
Straight up
[Verse:]
Supress the revolution of premeditated scheme
Introduce a drug called crack, to us ghetto teens
Got a law for raw ******, now playa what it be like?
When will ****** see they got us bleedin with three strikes
Can't seem to focus hopeless, with violent thoughts I wrote this
Got these Devils petrified, hidin from my hocus-pocus
And so I learned to earn my currency in over time (muahahaha)
Affiliated, clearly click a military mind
May God forgive us though we dwell inside a paradox
Thugged out and drug dealin, from the womb to the block
My live mind got me survivin five rounds
My forty-five got my fortified with live rounds
When ****'s thick we plot hits, when our glock spits
All hail, Out on Bail, Wrath of 2Pacalypse
Forever ghetto necessary picture food stamps
Outlaw **** ****** never left the boot camp
Chorus: Busta Rhymes
We got the real live **** from front to back
To my ****** in the world, 2Pac is back
Where my soldierz is at? (2X)
Where the **** my soldierz at?
Where my soldierz is at?
[Verse 2:]
Now I was born as a rebel, making trouble for the devil
Take this ******* ****, to a whole nother level
Can you feel me now? Armies in every city
Definition of power, players are you with me?
See the war is the profecy, survival is the strategy
Rest in peace to my comrades that deceased
(Busta Rhymes: Notorious B. I. G)
Organize these streets in time
Youll have these devils petrified of a ***** in his right mind
They tell us that we hopeless and hell bound
This for the brothers in penetentiaries jailed down
I got you in my heart till tha day I die
Think of tha damage we can do, if we wasnt high
Can you picture me loc? Its a thugs wrath
Political contracts and blood baths
For Matulu Shakur up in the rikers,
Though they got you, I never let them stop me
The struggle continues
(2Pac Talkin)
Now if we do want to live a **** life and a gangsta life and all of that,
Ok, so stop being cowards and lets have a revolution
But we don't wanna do that, dudes just wanna live of character
They wanna be cartoons, but if they really wanted to do something
If they was that tough, alright, lets start our own country
Lets start a revolution, lets get out of here, lets do something
Chorus: Busta Rhymes
We got the real live **** from front to back
To my ****** in the world, 2Pac is back
Where my soldierz is at? (2X)
Where the **** my soldierz at?
Where my soldierz is at?

it became a perpetual motion
a dance
someone hands the card, another lights
the amount of aching discolored grazed fingers was immense
put your finger on the flint wheel
press it down

karen thought we should make a sign
the scrambles of bruised fingers for a piece of cardboard
my fingers throbbed as i scratched our message on the board
i kept the pink flower locked in the crease of my hand
and threw them in air
“draft card burning here”

it was 7 00 in the morning
october 21 1967
i was only 17
my brother jeffrey was flying a plane over dien bien phu
a friend richard was screaming in the trenches of xuan loc
a lover michael treading through a swamp in mui bai ****

i stepped up to The Police.
The. Men. In. Suits. Stared. At. Me
Blank. Faces. And. No. Expression.
I picked up my Pink Daisy, and brought it up to their bayonets
this is for Jeffrey, for Richard, and for Michael

the men in suits stared at me
in a world of chaos and confusion
all I heard was
Silence.

this plain of death

corpse-strewn
stone lonely
smashed objects
broken by

abstractions

what painted this scene?

decisions made
by ample men
in clean rooms
faraway

good reasons
bad intentions

abstractions

orders given
and followed

a soldier
slumps among
the bodies

abstractions

stained fatigues
silent rifle
dead eyes

wondering

how this happened
and who they were
and why

abstractions

no answers

boy, man,
executioner,
victims

abstractions

killer or killed

life will not
go on

   - mce

YELLOW TAIL MOUSE TALE  
From the 9th diary entry of Stewy Lemmon's childhood adventures.  
 
This week, I had the best surprise present since Christmas Day, when I received my new grouse pet mouse named, Smooch. But the surprise didn't come from my parents, Archie or Flo, for it didn't even come from my little brother Lemmy's mouth. It wasn't from the mouths of my two much older identical twin sisters, Emma and Jemma, either.  
 
Believe it or not, it came from the mouth of my mouse, named Smoochy. Yes that's right, he does speak and he told me about his remarkable life story, since birth.  
 
It began when, I was feeding him some of my Mum's delicious afternoon treat. Do you remember the one that I named, 'a colourful fruit-blast'? Smoochy said, 'wow!, I love your Mum's food, it reminds me of my Mums magical dessert creations, she used to make for me, before I came to live with the you and your family'.  
 
I was gob smacked, when I heard Smoochy, actually having a conversation with me. I now knew 100%, that I wasn't dreaming or hallucinating, when I thought, Smoochy spoke to me. Just like the time on the seashore with the whale, and the fairy floss at the seaside resort named, Slipslopslap Bay. Also the time during the circus, while we were holidaying at the big top park circus, named Rolling River Retreat.  
 
Smoochy, told me about his parents, who's names are, Slippy and Sloppy. He also said, 'that his birth name is actually, Poppy, but he didn't mind being called,Smoochy. His name I had given him last Christmas. He said, 'it's grouse for a mouse to have a cool nickname, in the world of humans'.  
 
He also added, that in the animal world most creatures, don't even speak. Except for some mice, a parrot, and he was also led to believe, maybe even the odd Dolphin, swimming around the ocean.  
 
Smoochy, told me, 'how he and his parents Slippy and Sloppy, ended up at the local pet shop, in my local village named, Shimmerdimmerlee, when he was only about 2 years old'.  
Smoochy' said, 'that his parents, used to travel around the globe, with the very colourful and world famous circus troop name, 'Mr. Kazoontite's and his Marvellous, Magical, Mysterious and Musically Minded Misfits'.  
 
They both used to appear in an act, with the circus's ventriloquist, who's stage name was, 'Mumbling Murray the Mouth of the South'.They would pop their heads out of his top, left and right hand side pockets, of his jacket, and pretend to speak in English.They could also speak, a bit of his native language called, 'Ogbogolo'.  
 
When Mumbling Murray, opened his mouth and spoke, they would only be grinding their teeth together, to get the cheese out of the gaps of their teeth. But, the crowd thought it was funny, so they just kept doing it, for every act, over several years.  
 
Then one day, my Mum was having a baby, it was me. So, I was born in a big top circus and was looked after, ever so well by my parents and all of the other circus workers. Then one day, Mumbling Murray had to go back to his home country, to look after his sick sister.  
 
Mumbling Murray, had just finished the circus tour, near our village and decided he should take my parents and I to the local pet store. He thought, 'maybe they can be cared for, by a new loving family'.  
 
While living in the pet store, we noticed, with utter amazement, a very colourful parrot, talking in English. So Smoochy's Dad, answered him back, and the parrot almost fell off his perch. He spun around, about 3 times in a row. He then yelled back to my Dad, 'did you say that'? Yes, I did indeed, replied my dad, with a very proud smile on his face. Wow, said the parrot, 'I thought I was the only non human, who could speak'.  
 
Smoochy's Dad told the parrot, who's name was Polly, by the way, 'that he and his wife Sloppy, had learnt to speak English, from the ventriloquist acts performing with Mumbling Murray, the Mouth of the South, and the world famous circus troop named, 'Mr. Kazoontite's, Marvellous, Magical, Mysterious and Musically Minded Misfits'. They, in turn, taught their only son, Smoochy, mouse language. during the day and English at night, before he went to sleep.  
 
As for my Mum Sloppy and her magical dessert creations she used to make for the family. It was the best mixtures of sweet and colourful ingredients anyone could ever imagine. She used to go looking for snacks that were left on the floor under the seating area after the end of each nights circus performance. She would find things like salted popcorn with a touch of butter, a variety of different coloured chocolate, Neapolitan ice cream, orange Jaffa's and an assortment of lollies. It was so fun eating it all in a large dessert bowl after our main meal.  
 
Gee I miss those days and miss my mum and dad so much, Smoochy (Poppy) told me. So the next day I mentioned to my parents that I really need to go to the loc pet shop to get something really important for Smoochy. They said what do you need? Dad said I have built you a new pet mouse house for your grouse new pet mouse Smoochy and I even hand painted it with such colourful flair using my artistic nous.  
 
What else does Smoochy need, asked my mum. I said it is something that everyone needs in life and can never be replaced. So my parents said ok, tomorrow morning we will go down to the village pet shop and try and find what is so important for you and your grouse pet mouse Smoochy.  
 
Here we are Smoochy, at the pet shop that took you and your parents in a few years ago. Let's go and have a look for you mum and dad together. We saw slimy snakes, sticky spiders, floating frogs, flirting fish, droopy ducks and even timid turtles. Then all of a sudden we spotted several mouse houses.  
 
Smoochy was quietly saying, "Hello mum and dad are you here", even I was yelling out, Slippy, Sloppy, are you here. Then Smoochy spotted his parents in a mouse house which was stacked up on the top of a shelf full of books, towards the back of the pet shop.  
 
Hello son, how have you been and how did you and your new friend know we were living here? Smoochy told them that his new friend Stewy, knows that he can talk and I told him of my early years of life and what had happened to us all.  
 
I then yelled out to my parents, "I've found what Smoochy needs, we have found his real parents right here in Shimmerdimmerlee's village pet shop. Mum and dad said ok, you can have the two much older mice, so Smoochy has a mum and dad like everyone should have in their lives, even though they aren't his real parents.  
 
So back home we went and welcomed Smoochy's mum and dad, Slippy and Sloppy to their new grouse pet mouse house and even showed them dads unusually built and outrageously painted outback backyard shed.  
 
It was a hot afternoon, so we also slid down the "Terrific Triple Tumbling Tremendously Turning Travelling Tubes" to the village pond and introduced Buck the Duck to Smoochy's mum and dad.  
 
Smoochy and I have decided to keep his families secret to ourselves for now. It's ok that my mum and dad don't believe what I say on some occasions, because at least I know what the meaning of family means deep down inside, for myself but also for my friend and grouse pet Smoochy and his loving mum and dad.

******* ain't **** in 2000's i don't trust em
they show they ***** so **** 'em
buck 'em down smack downs with the gun in hand
leave a permanent frown in school i was a clown
after the money the green crack scene king
everything turned reality from a dream
now a loc on the loose lookin' for a caboose
so i can tap it like rabbit smokin' jokerslike a bad habit
show up boy if ya want to watch these slugs dump up on you
still a ***** been real since i was an embryo
don't matter the scenery or scenario down for my barrios
turn 15 keys to 75 G's nigguh please 
i don't mean to brag but i got street cred **** the feds
and cops to 502's tryna get a brother on a catch 22
learned game from the wise my eyes
filled with blood from **** im tokin'
throwin' a peck harder than woody woulda
carvin' haters with barbed wire
im Crazy never lazy with my trigger aim high not low
hop in the blue midnight 64 pinin' the baddest cabbage
raw savage spittin' cavi flow open up ya holes
with my hallows ya swallow casket follow
but ain't no love lost toss out the best of 'em
now they sleepin' with the rest of 'em
ti's the retunr of the G me replica of the E
they may forget you i but imma keep you alive
though ya dead and gone
im continue stompin' much luv from Texas to Compton

So what the ****? ****** bumpin' gums
talkin' loud but sound like they got ***
in their mouth watch ya mouth boy
i ain't comin' to play
deals from Montego Bay parlay in the streets Texas to LA
i smoke muthaphukkaz like a philly
get off the ***** silly crazier than a hillbilly
fuedin' cities show none pities
to muthaphuckaz the world is a ****** up place
too many after the paper chase
from ladies to hoes rich to poors weak trend to populace fashion shows
i opened doors
thats locked dont give a **** thats why i keep the pistol cocked
knocked off'd another now ya blood on the concrete
duck nigguh! now ya *** a sleep a creep
on the real thought really doe
i don't rock diamonds or pretentious jewels
just man made rules **** religion along with a stool pigeon
my hands itchin'
cuz im urgin' for another ****** plan with the pistol hand
to **** propaganda can't tha
stupid *** media nothing but ******* hidin'
behind tubes muthaphukkaz
come out come out so i can show ya what the
hallow points about
i may get killed for keepin' to real
i put that on my kids and my biz
by the way my muthaphukkin' name is!!!
_

So proud to live in Queensland, for all it has to share
For anywhere else, in this great land I really just don't care.
I love the smell of burning cane
The ash flying through the air.
This sunburnt state was my home before I went away.
My wife and kids I left behind, hoping to see another day
I answered this great nations call when I was just nineteen.
That didn't stop the enthusiasm, boy I was so keen.
Timor, Iraq, Afghanistan, before I turned twenty five.
On return home to this state my life then took a dive.
The friend left first, the social life. No more did that exist.
The nightmares and the drinking took their place, to this day they do persist.
My family suffered most of all, my moods went bad to worse.
I went through stages where i almost gave up on everything in my life that had any worth.
I got some help in Hospital to help mend my tormented ways.
That way I can spend the rest of my life spending all my days,
In this sunburnt state of ours, at the family home
Now I only feel normal, when I am alone
I now spend all my time on the family farm raising sheep pigs chooks and cows.They can at least be trusted, I can spend hours and hours
This state is more than just a loc, a place you say you live, Queensland is the only place that has given so much, but still continues to give.
I love this state, ill never move. Till the day I die
Even if they said to me, it's easy if you try
But when I go remember that, I have been tormented, torn and broken,
but at least i lived in paradise the truest words ever spoken
Gavin H
20 May 2014

Dis is one dream that won’t be pleasant
I’m the master, you the peasant
Broken Ankles and Totaled Cars
Really!? More like Strange Dreams from weird bars
Guess it can’t be, Queens too young
In a club, hands w’d get tied, like your tongue
More like a wanna be princess, than a true Queen
You got weak poems like Death by Dopamine
Mo like, Death by Dope Poet, me!
Ya best run back to the Prayer Closest gurll
Time for a Waking up, I’m da King of the world
There are two things you can take
That your Unabridged Loc Bat and your Mistake
Show some Self-Control SISS
Gonna get your ******* in a great big twist
Your right about one thing, it’s My Fault
That you’re stumblin’ in the hundred, an I’m winin the vault
BOO HOO! Handle With Care
My rhymes nock your teeth out and pull your hair         (Not me, rhymes. No violence towards women!)
I Release my poems, to be a my ****
You’ll be reciting’ Memories of You, like a drug
You asked the question, What I May Lose
It aint up to you B, it’s for me to choose
You were So Close, you could almost taste it
In stepped the King, now your poems aint worth sh…..

Yo Yo! Listen up all you shawtys
Ya steppin’ to the Kng, you must b chugging foties
Take a herd of ya’ll to get in my face
Talken to you, Somethin’ and Madison Grace
This is the toughest challenge you’ll ever face
Betta  get fifty of ya all pseudo poets
Cuz you’re the what?
And I’m the KNOW IT!!!!!!!

I have seen death's face
in many places
from Saigon to An Loc,
to the DMZ:
not by virtue, but luck,
he did not see me.

The others who fell
in those self-same places,
he surprised and snatched
away too slow to flee:
by the dumbest of luck,
he did not take me.

Now they are the forgotten dead
and I am old and weary
and worlds from Saigon
An loc or the DMZ:
my time and luck are running out
and slowly he turns his face toward me.

  ~mce

and i’ve lived years of
turbulence; to be loc-
k’d out. problems str-
iking as an adder. pro-
blems adding to the
strike out. end of the
game we all play but
for the lone individ-
ual, and i was hand’d
the pack of smokes
with a ten wrap’d ‘ro-
und. not an act of for-
ced reliance. act of:
  – save your money.
     you need it more
     than i.
and i’ve learn’d to ac-
cept. to receive with
grace and charity, to
offer in grace and ch-
arity. that other ten
percent.       braking.
     January,
year prior, to be found
destitute yet suffer no
one’s restrictions. and
the numb fingers rem-
ind me of my obstina-
nce, remind me that
i’ve been made to suf-
fer the cold.
oh, how the frigid
men slept with a rotg-
ut shank prepared. en-
ding dreams in which
survival is their sunrise.
and i pull’d a scarf over
my face to obviate the
cold. and in the false
spring of year prior, the
trees were trick’d to
give up their leaves
budding life as an
early spring sacrifice.

I don't know how to react anymore
and I don't want to see or read
or feel these words anymore.

I'm back to:
numb
too far past cold to:
feel
too close to warm to:
go back.

I'm noticing pieces of me
that are pieces of you,
and pieces of him,
all bundled together in little buckets
and big buckets and zip-loc bags
and old mint tin cans,
see them spilling from your open spaces,
and hear them ringing in all of mine.
Mostly from the half of you that cares
or the half of you the matters because of it:
the deeply-colored-yet-rarely-touched,
the wide-spread-and-beggingly-waiting.
the almost-loving-but-definitely-can't.

everything.

its the rip comin' up

with much reps i keeps my eyes on the prize

g'yeah i improvised on a uprise

cuttin' all the dead weight competition

my ammunition keep suckas in suspension

or lock down when i come around i clown

with the homies and the homettes

got the wet wet to get my brain set

for a drive-by suckas slippin' 40 sippin' 4 dippin' hittin'

multiple switches laughin' at these

punk sons of ******* unload my clips

throw there bodies in the ditches

cut off they ***** n leave it in they mouth

so they know the south

aint no joke loc cuz we smoke

suckas til they wesley snipes color brothers

like me bound for the penitentiary

its a gang were all the low-lifes hang

but things don't ever change

im trapped inside a maze with much blunder

i could've have been successful maybe

if the hood didn't take me under!!!


so many after me cuz we enticed to the same

epitome rap is mind my mind is rap

can't shake the flaks

see my homie in the caddy rollin' with tha **** daddy

gangsta mack kickin' drag to all the hoes with big *****

skipped hardknock classes

went straight to hoods college gainin' knowledge

graduated with honors

from the big timers tellin' me how to make a move

and don't get caught up in the groove

u gots to play it smooth

and be vigilant on ya closest friends

cuz they'll pretend to be ya homies but after ya dividends

thinkin' this bank roll they gone spend? but i lends

my lue to no one only a gun

up in ya grill piece thats the only peace

i see you laying and becomin' one with death

heartbeats slow no hards breath

when i commence to ****** know ya never heard of

me cuz i strike unexpectedly im makin' money

by the ton thats on the one son

ull catch me rollin' in a pimped out 97 honda

maybe id be better off dead if the hood

wouldn't take me under!!!

I didn't know him well.
I was only just twenty.
He was the first Indian
I had ever met though
he called himself a Skin.
Came from northern Nebraska.
He was tall, strong, quiet
and soft spoken
with a strange authority.
Somehow, he could sense fear.
At the end of the first day
over An Loc I was
well beyond fear, beyond
terrified, barely functional.
While we refueled
he came over and told me
not to worry. Every day,
he said, was a good day to die.
First time I ever heard
Crazy Horse's famous phrase.
In the morning, his waddling,
overloaded chopper took
a SAM missile up the ***
and totally disintegrated:
no wreckage, no bodies,
no anything left at all.
There's nothing
really left to say
except I hope that for him
it was a very good day.

  ~mce

He took the dagger
from the dead hand
of a Marine Major
on the battlefield
of An Loc
so the tame *****
wouldn't steal it
like the thieving
cowards they were.
Kept it, used it,
smuggled it
back to the world,
has had it for 43 years
and now it sits
on his coffee table,
still talon sharp,
against the day
when he might need
to cut the world's throat.

A great man said
fatigue makes cowards
of us all.
When I tire I falter.
After 72 straight hours
of flying at An Loc,
I slept with my eyes open
and was terrified
every moment
I was conscious.
No more wars for me,
an old man 50 years later,
an old body bent
on a different life.
When I am weary
I see the raw meat
on the floor
and think a new life
is impossible
but maybe some
variations on a theme
could happen.
I feel like
a worn out raccoon
treed by the hounds of life.
I feel giddy
with self-doubt
as if the world
is telling me something
I don't want to hear.
"Devouring time blunt
thou thy lion's paws."
And I will sleep
and tomorrow
what is impossible
tonight might
even seem likely.

  ~mce

Why were you smiling
as you turned
my blue sky
white cloud mind
into a thunderstorm?

Was it funny when you created dust
out of my porcelain love?

Did you enjoy
sprinting over the twigs
that were my bones,
crunching them into the open, dried out pinecones
that I opened for you?

Of course you were smiling.
I allowed it.
I relinquished my tight grip of the tattered ropes
that held you to me.
I let your untamed soul run free,
setting fires wherever you traveled.

I still love that smile.
That smile that pierces my zip-loc bag of a spirit
and lets the contents sprawl across the floor.
You won't pick up the mess.
That's okay.

I let you set fires that decimate entire cities
just so I can see that intoxicating smile.

Rollin down the street with lil Pauly trollin all the freaks with their Converse conversing on the Servicemen and the suicide rates waiting at the gates for the slow ride to make the left turn at the community estate, I state, its great liven upper middle in the greenest state eating entitlement cake acting like I am vital and any mistake would break the system we bump fists and switch the disk by remote control stroll down the veranda like a Versace panda rockin an ice banana and a Bernie Sanders bandana living breathing socialism planner listen to the police scanner don't have to smoke bammer like Loc in the slammer up in Alabama fresh pajamas flannel and polyester pics of a jester wrestler molesting a waitress successfully doing the Cosby ya'll be callin me insensitive but I'm representative of a nation that don't give a **** --

Get up and grind through time the mind
in and out intwine
the mind ablaze a puff of rays a smoke
I praise Omega, go ahead and poke

Broke, "loc" but just for today, NOT for Alpha
Has guided my ways, these days our family still
Finds a way so we grind till the dollar bills turns to rays.

Vaporized by emotion, commotion
Vaporized by the endless need to consume.

To regrow too, to leave our imprint so they know once we were here, can they hear?

Thoughts in the grind, a trance that it sears like fire and the infernos that touch as I move for the currency harden my skin and thy emotion 'till dreams path cleanse again and I know I awake to God here again.

Guiding my ways so I fear not destruction, cause in fires defeat I learn something, those ways that are shown take me there then taking me home where I learn from my Lord, Omega marching to Heavens door oh' how I adore the days again I praise thy Lord

knows my ways, my ****** BLASPHEMIES ways. Again I march as I pray, take me where I need to be in fires or in ice, freeze, in space where a black hole tarnishes my face, now my mind bleeds and recedes

back to you, Omega I know one day there will be proof, but will that be enough for some minding their truths.

Conquering the dollar.
Conquering the land.

There is truth being brought by you so take my hand.

As I grind through time the, endless march till destruction, picking up my loot as I go praising my Lord in my consumption.

Se pare ca știi totul
Și doar a predica
Nu văd ce rost are
Aici prezența mea
Când ce rezultă-n mine este numai sânge
Dat pe dinafară pentru a te unge
Pe răni tu, înțeleptule
Ai țipat destul să-mi tai urechile
Furia ți-a ajuns dincolo de cer
Și cântecul ți-e plin numai de "disper"
Si gol de "ajutor"

Însă nu e "gol"
De "spune-i tu pentru mine"
Ca și când ar fi ok să obții
Tot ceea ce vrei fără sa îți ții
Singur șaua vieții
Se simte incredibil și-mi pare impecabil
De bine plănuit, căci nu ești responsabil
Dacă nu merge bine, doar n-ai spus tu ceva
Erai prea ocupat cu a te alerga
Cu furia cu mânia și mândria ta

Toți sunteți furioși și intitulați
Să aveți dreptate, să nu vă schimbați
Toți sunteți titani și restul sunt cei proști
Se pare că sunteți destul de inimoși
Să vă iubiți pe voi suficient încât
Să vă protejați de orice v-ar provoca mai mult
Perspectiva asupra realității
Asupra iubirii sau a maternității

Iubirea mea nu pare
Să aibă loc aici
Și nu-s vreun salvator
Ca să vă scap de frici
Mai ales atunci când clar ca din topor
N-ați sugerat niciunul că vreți vreun ajutor

Suferiți că vă place și asta-i adevărul
Pe care-l văd eu, nu *** sa fiu eroul
Când refuzați puternic orice implicare
Care să vă fie puțin provocatoare.

Nu vă doriți salvare, ci numai validare.

Sclavi ai vieții voastre, ah cât e de trist
Dar păreți comfortabili în lacrimi și abis
Și când am încercat o mână sa vă-ntind
M-am topit și-am plâns, era mult prea acid

De libertatea-i munte, îmi sunteți plini de mare
Și-am să vă mulțumesc, căci nu e de mirare
Că busola mă îndrumă pe altă cărare
Și vântul dintre pânze îmi zice așa tare

"Ești doar eroul tău, și orice chemare
Ce vine dinspre ei, doar cere ca atare
O respingere simplă, fără vreo formă
De sentiment de ură sau țipete de normă "

Nu vreau sa vorbesc cu nimeni despre nimic
Și am s-o țin simplu, nu am s-o complic
Dacă îmi aduceți acest zgomot în casă
Sper să mâncați bine, dar nu la a mea masă,
Am sa vă anunț că nu e pentru mine,
Și am s-o zic repetat și dacă tot nu-i bine
Sau nu are valoare încă ce vă spun,
Sper să fiți iubiți, dar pe al meu drum
Nu vă mai *** permite vreun fel de access
În realitatea mea sau să îmi abuzez
Iubirea și răbdarea când văd așa de des
E loc doar de-un om, și drumu-i deja mers
De mine.

Așa că baftă voua,
Și cu bine mie.
Sau poate e pe dos,
Nu vreau sa stiu,
In fine.

_M.

gleaming face

gentle wind strokes

winter mist

amidst the dusk spectrum

occasionally, the horn sings;

forward we must go.



from a poet

with silent tricks

to broadcast nonchalance

guiding lively slaves

through a path

scattered in pain

the brittle loc’d poet

says blow the horn.

listen to my rap tales
this aint a fairytale
all hail don yosef here
so here me clear have no fear
in this *******
had to do my ***** dishes
to make hood riches
but then again
im just one of fishes
stuck in the sea
of the lost souls
spawning outta control
how can i maintain
this pain on my brain.
and they say im insane?
*** i see the game
**** the fame need i explain?
how many gone die for the same lies
true eyes realize
the mind hypnotize
by the tvs aint no surprise by sunrise
you see thugs rise
on the verge of revolution
positions in place
pistols shootin'
enemies get bootin'
loc'd out with my posse we boostin'
into overdrive
once we ride and collide
bound to be a homicide
can you picture me
living this dream called reality
a cold fantasy but remember me G
that game that i passed down
for centuries
ill be right here even if they ****** me
my seed will be in a women
my legacy continues
this cant be livin


how the **** is this livin?
everday sinning
while the evils grinning
and them devil's winning
what a cold world
we live in
justice comes just as
so **** they ***
i let my gun blast
at the task
force
mixe my words out the source of course
im a rebel considered a rival
to the system
buckin em
never duck from em
i see you got fan mail
but never see me in jail
my wisdom never fail
learn from the universe
how to reverse the curse
i make the best out of the worse
the best is yet to come
how come
they want me dead
picture me in casket?
next to them soulless *******?
im rolling the.game blackwards act awkward
to coward
but aint no ***** in me
since i took the **** principality
make possibility
lool easy
if ya black like me
ya know they strike us quick
like a match fast burn
when will we learn
this aint our ******' home
im alone in the battlefield
got my kids
kissin me through a bulletproof shield
got **** how could fall trapped
into this deadly game
called society
this aint livin to me G

im a psychopathic
drastic causin' cataclysmic
intent i make disaster every i time i record on the master
tape i spit hotter than a pyroclastic
from a volcano the iconoclastic
is back puttin' foes in plastic im fantastic
as the four flame on on my hoes im a graphic
visionary turn you ghost now u in a cemetery hail mary
im controversial equivocal
satirical makin' miracles
everywhere i go might as well call me a oracle and turn my vocal
so i can show you how loco
i can get on the beat mystique--unique my style can't be competed or defeated
no losses king of all bosses
my competitors is air heads
they been deflated unappreciated
control by me so u know they dictated
as well it ain't hard to tell
i got a big **** makin' ******* ring they bell regina bell i gotta bunch of stories to tell
got more thrills than great adventures
suckas takin' mouth shots only to extract they dentures
toothless ruthless merciless
with this style i spit ****
on these flaks i feed bread crumbs to the birds--oh i thought u heard?
that boy yosef ain't no joc loc
i leave suckas more smoked
than butts in astray rhyme i day
eat up emcees like good n plenty bars
i got many if any
want to jump ill leave u beggin' for chance take a quick glance
and you'll see i take it literal this is the visions of lyrical