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There is a million
in this auditorium
that is meant
only for one
and I am in the
spotlight in the back

limelight
of limelights
in the grim
...dim...
spot
of attention
...wide eyed stares
from ghosts in the walls
scuttling

and amongst the million
I am
quite ignored.
Aaron LaLux Sep 2019
Remember Your Self [3]

I don’t write because I want to, it’s not exactly pleasurable,
I write because I have to, it’s an addiction, it’s compulsory,
I write because someone’s got to document the events of us,
& our experiences in the collective epoch in this living history,

this whirlwind life that’s such a rush of blurs it’s obscured,
especially in a place as stimulating as Hollywood,
where it’s all too easy to get lost in the intoxicating limelights,
especially when ego strokes are handed out free-of-charge,
expensive tastes are paid, constant cheap thrills are supplied,
there’s an open bar complete with complimentary bottles,
models that’re gorgeous, fortunes that’s enormous sized,
inside are pop chart artists, lots of toxins for thirsty nostrils,
plus encore nights, because you always get the hottest invites,
to the most exclusive events to party with American idols,

but in the sauce of all that awesomeness,
try not to forget yourself & get lost in it,
see Hollywood can certainly be good for your ego,
but can also be bad for your health & often is,

Hollywood,
where people don’t care who you are, only what you are,

Hollywood,
where people only care about you as long as it feeds their ego,
even though one must starve the ego to feed the soul,
they should know, you must starve the ego to feed the soul.

Though it seems these days we’ve got it all backwards,
we feed the ego while starving the soul,
see these superficial feelings are only emotional actors,
our selves are the stage & they’re just playing their roles,

kinda like when you think it’s me that you’re holding,
but in reality it’s just my body it’s not my soul you hold,

oh I’m first to admit I see all of this, but I’m not an Apologist,
so I don’t apologize, see I’m an Emotional Anthropologist,
so I write words with no apologies to try & describe all of this,
for all of us in the form of Poetic Literary Ambiance Lists,

I write these soulful love letters, to our future past selves,
so hopefully we can remember to remember the memories,
& in turn remember remember our selves,
& that’s why I write these literary anthropologies,

I don’t write because I want to, it’s not exactly pleasurable,
I write because I have to, it’s an addiction, it’s compulsory,
I write because someone’s got to document the events of us,
& our experiences in the collective epoch in this living history..

∆ LaLux ∆

from THHT3: The Hollywood Hearts Trilogy vol. 3
available worldwide 9/9/19
Sergio Gonzalez Dec 2020
I see butterflies in the sky
I see the trees sway
And the birds fly
And I wonder,
Could it be my time
Is this my moment
Is this a sign from the devine?

I wait and wait and wait
I wait to the point that I may lose hope
I was never meant for this moment
Was I never meant for this world?

But this maudlin feeling hovers over me
Feeding the doubt in my mind
Filling me with shame
Straight into my heart

But feelings come and feelings go
There’s no perfect moment
In this perfect world

So let’s dance under the dim lights
No time for moonlights
No time for limelights
Enough with the perfect moments
Fabricated at the expense
Of living our lives
Don’t miss that moment
Wishing for the stars to align
Somehow things will work out
And if they don’t
At least we tried
But forevermore we’ll know
We are all meant for this world
Jamie Jul 2018
Hold tight to that illusion of freedom
Like the quilted lies
That, drip from your fingertips
And throw them into the
Darkness behind you
like the fabricated illusion
Of our own prosperity.
Where wrapped in others
Silken words of misconstrusion
our people lie in wait
Ready to cross walls
They cannot hope to break down.
Our land of the free is priced in expletives
Spoken brassly on shining screens
As falsified information pours out of
It,s limelights.
There are family trees burned to cinders.
Half off of your freedom!
New sale here!
Just pay everything you own,
And your family ties and voila,
Here you are in our free priced land of the free,
Your worth decided by your face,
Your speech, the hard won calluses
On your hands, open in a useless
Sign of peace
Where the homes of the brave
Hold vacant signs and empty people
Shells of what they used to be,
Standing in as the 2 by 4 support beams.
Send your sequin sympathies
To those with the money to pay for them,
To watch you twirl on stage spouting
Shakespearean lines of unfelt empathy
Attempting to assuage the audience
And pass off inequality as the new normal
The power play goes on
The curtains close on one more act of
Unconstitutional proportions
The audience
Unknowing
Applauds
~In response to our government and their decisions~
Telephone lines above me.
Electric like Elvis’s guitar.
Guns & Roses playing softly.
I’m feeling like a fallen star.

Gas station, LED lights.
I’m a deer in headlights.
Ovation, green lights.
I’m having a panic attack.

I dyed my hair black, do you recall that, baby?
I used to think I’d dye it blonde again when I’m happy or did I wanna dye already?
Red sky, who are they to downgrade me?
I just lied my *** in the grave they dug me.
Slap me upside the head already.
Tell me to be smarter.

Starlets making news by malice.
I’m just idly crossing that turnpike.
Once I was in love, in Paris.
Entranced reasonlessly in my mind.

Hollywood, limelights.
I’m so prone to gaslight.
Only saw me in bad light.
Poked fun at my loneliness.

I sought solace in Mötley Crue, remember, baby?
They were all laughing, jumping rope and I wanted to jump off something high already.
Red sky, who were they to affect me?
I just had to stand for myself, apparently.
Bury me in your arms already.
Tell me I’ll be okay.

We’re hitting the road now, baby, tell me it’ll be okay.
We’re entering the desert now, baby, fifteenth interstate.

Clover.
Yachts.
Vermilion.
Who were they to upset me?

Hoops.
Harleys.
Equinox.
Who were they to decry me?

If I write you a Devil Glitch, will you love me like your next *****?
If I give you some attention, will you ease off all this tension?
If I write you a Devil Glitch, will you love me like your next *****?
If I give you everything, will I get at least some of it back?
Wonder why I’m clingy, wonder why I’m so anxious all the time?
Wonder why I’m so tired, wonder why I don’t trust anyone?
Red sky, who were they to change me?
I just nodded when they used me.
Drive me to Vegas already.
Tell me to be braver.
First promotional poem off my 9th poetry collection titled “Major Arcana (Hope II)”.

It was originally meant to be a song. I created the concept of it in fall of 2018 but never got to actually write it. Finally, in February 2024 I made this poem.
Skyler M Aug 2024
When sitting within the room where I was reborn,
I cannot tell if the fumes that I exhale are toxic,
When I'm so afraid for anyone to know me,
For what if they find out I'm a tyrant before I do?

Sitting in a crowded room with the lights,
Bearing down on my shoulders and tongue,
Manage the twisting shame through trials,
I am a twisted beast full of sin and carnage.

I am a twisted beast full of sin and carnage,
A dictator pleading with deities for forgiveness,
Ravage the next night with vicious vices,
I am nothing more than a young and dumb kid.

Sitting in a crowded room with the lights,
Bearing down on my shoulders and tongue,
Manage the twisting shame through trials,
I wish I was confident in my impoverished crimes.

Don't look my way, no, cause I'll feel it,
Bitterness that crawls into my throat-

Is it that I'm a bad dog?
Am I dog trained to protect myself?
Or am I a stray yearning for a home?
Can I follow someone home and curl into their lap?
Can I lick my own wounds and share them carefully?
Or will my hackles begin to raise as my lip curls?
Or will I turn to bite and tear at the hand's flesh?

Sitting in a crowded room with the limelights,
Bearing down on my shoulders and tongue,
Manage the twisting shame through trials,
I am a twisted beast full of sin and carnage.

I am as I was raised to be.
Smita Jun 8
EXAMS FINISHED AND I'M STILL FEELING BAD,
A HAPPY ENDING, BUT I FEEL NOSTALGIC AND SAD.
WILL BE MISSING ONLINE CLASSES,
AND NEW BONDS WITH THE MASSES.
THOSE ASSIGNMENTS AND END-MINUTE REVISIONS,
NEVER-ENDING DISCUSSIONS WITH  CHANGE OF SEASONS.
THOSE SELF-LEARNING MATERIALS AND SCARY TEN YEARS,
THAT HAPPINESS OF REACHING HERE AND HOLDING ONTO THE TEARS.
EXAMS ARE OVER ....
BUT, THIS LIFE ITSELF IS THE BIGGEST EXAM,
MAY YOU ALL SCORE WELL AND BEND IT LIKE BECKHAM!
SPREAD LOVE AND HELP EVERYONE,
AFTER ALL, IT LIMELIGHTS YOU AS A TRUE HUMAN.✨

@Smita writes

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