The dead brown of winter gives rise to yellow cups in lacey dress,
lifting their bowed heads to take in the golden days of spring.
Mornings heralded by melodic songs calling out for spring partners
in trees filled with cascades of color and buds waiting to open.
The snow and blackness has lifted and life has begun once more.
Forgiveness has found a foothold in this crushed heart.
Like a doctor sewing wounds and stopping the drain of lifeblood,
I have found a way to heal and make it back to life once again.
All poems are copy written and sole property of Vicki Kralapp.
I look at your eyes and they
remind me of my despair over
Many days of late, I find myself
truly pondering whether or not I
am cut out to be a human being.
It seems my flaws are too many.
To quote Jesse Lacey, "my bright
is too slight to hold back all my
I wish, I could write poems about
how I'm getting better, but that
isn't the case. My emotional
life feels like a downward spiral.
I feel like I'm building toward
something. i don't feel I have
any happiness in anything I do.
My default is numb. It's so rare
that I experience happiness anymore.
Something is wrong with me.
Something is wrong with me.
Something is wrong with me.
I don't want to live like this.
"I ****** less", she said grabbing her lacey dress.
Her contrary dignity intact as she takes a sip of whiskey.
Walking out the door becoming the prominent mother everyone adores.
*** addict, she ignores.
No one sees the double life she hides so well.
Between the sheets of Monogamy and lustry gratification.
Her heart beats wildly out of control making her want to feed.
Possibly disfunctional programming involved.
She feels no need to anguish in the games she plays.
Love is where her happiness is.
*** is where her gut resides.
As I came through the door
Taps the cat meowed at me
As she crisscrossed the floor space
Staying a foot ahead of me
Glancing into the big closet or tiny room
Whichever ... Dad called it his study
"Hey dad " I yelled at the back of his head
" His quick glance meant "hey buddy"
I noticed moms face on the computer screen
'Oh!"I snapped " mom ... Hey we miss you "
"I'm not talking to your crotch "she laughingly barked
"Sit down ... Move the camera or move your *** Trent"
I compromised by doing all three as dad took a break
The face of someone I truly loved sat there
Looking at me
From over three thousand miles away.
Three thousand miles away!
"Hey baby " she said in her cooing voice " How are you?"
"Got a job at Dannerlans ... Part time" I proudly engaged
"Don't let it interfere with" ...she couldn't stop and she knew...
I guess my stupid grin finally clued her in as she trailed off
"Half a world away and I'm still mom I guess. Dad musta.."
"He did ... Same thing.. And I won't. But what are you...."
"Don't you dare Trent " mock rage crossed her face
As a few octaves fell out of her voice and I already knew
Here it comes.....a tsunami all the way from Japan
Putting my nose right to the camera and pushing on
I repeated "tsunami mommy tsunami mommy san
What can you do about it . you're way over there and I'm..."
" Gonna get it so bad .. When I get home mister "
:You're gonna look end up looking just like your sister"
"Oh ....Kay... "I haltingly bounced her words round my mind
"I DONT HAVE A SISTER."
Then I saw it... Set up and now....
Confusion and pride had my ammunition... just the facts
Dad arrived at that second with a coke for me and his beer
"Did you hear her ?" I asked him
" threating to make me a girl"
As I gave up the chair I heard that cooing soft voice sorta ....
..........GR OO ooowl ?!? While still softly cooing "oh no no no...
Too good for you Bud...Buuud...Buddy? You'll just disa..pear!"
Dad laughed first - drawing me in as I reluctantly let go.
"Nice try dear.... but you lost it coming round the outside corner"
What do you mean outside corner ..it was right over but too low
"Bye mom" I said "got some homework to do " they were merged
Gone now for three month and three more to go .poor dad
His staunch had wilted within forty eight hours of her departure
But let's all pretend that you
never noticed the droop -a bit sad
Poor poor dad ... Poor poor dad I chimed as I climbed the stairs
He won't make it another three months . .. Very easy
I haltingly caught my words as the downer that they were
As I scooped the elegant Taps from the floor " but they'll make it "
I whispered into her ear. "Won't they girl? "Her answer was a purr
I'm thinking of joining the red cross
That's good...gets you out and about....
In the ...nei..bor....
"Okay .. Whats yet to be told ...spill
"They asked me to run the admin office" She
So you'll have to travel for a while that's ok" (He)
"The whole admin office for foreign.... " She let it trail......
Allright so you come back weekends
Ain't that far....to... (He)
.......... ...Japan ....(She)
Dad........didn't have any words to say
And the staunch started peeling away...right then and there
The love they shared
Might be compared
To historic qualities
Romeo and Juliet sans tragedy
Bogie and Bacall for longevity
Tracy and Hepburn for loyalty
Burns and Allen for ..for the comedy
So I knew.. as.. anyone else who
Saw him day to day decline
That she was on her way home
By seeing the force of nature
He suddenly became
A human dynamo in preparation
For the reunification.
I walked through the front door
Sharon at my side and lacey in tow
"Go tell your brother to get in here "
So she yelled out the front door
"Trenton Dean Robertson get in here!"
Sharon and I met eye to eye
Bossiest little Seven year old....
"TRENTON now!" I yelled out
"You better do what sis said"
He was now ten and tended to wander about
"I'm here "he said as he appeared
"Come on sis I'll beat you in...."
The last bit muffled
As they closed the basement door
And descending down the stairs
We both glanced into the closet
For that's what it really was
Dad sitting at the computer
And mom was on the screen
So I toted my load of groceries
As Sharon leaned in to say" hi "
And once we had supper going
I went to mix a drink and as I passed by
Dad said "son come here
Your mom wants to talk to you "
Besides we've been chatting forever!
Then he whispered "I gotta go to the loo"
"Hi mom "I said as he departed
Leaving me to warm the seat
I'm not talking to your crotch
She said for at least the millionth time
There on the screen was the face
Of someone that I loved
Who never made it home that year
The flight was destined for history
Crashing into the Himalayas
Taking everyone on board
And the staunch became so rigid
And reality was simply ignored
He handed me a coke and opened his beer
Before resuming his vigil at the computer screen
That was his reality....his fantasy... and his hex
Some might say an old adage to sum it up
"IS IT LIVE.....OR IS IT MEMOREX?"
AS I drifted from the room they were merged.
Pretty snowflakes swirling and spiralling through the air, softly landing
A myriad of different shapes and sizes
I laugh as one lands on my nose. My breath hangs in the air like a small cloud.
Snow to the knees, we sink in it as we walk and leave deep footprints. I try to step in your deeper footprints.
Overnight, white Winter, with cold heart has touched the land with her icey fingers and left a wonderland behind.
The stream is covered in ice, and translucent hard pointed jewels hang where once the waterfall cascaded. The bare arms of the trees are painted in white as Winter brushed past in her rush to cover the land.
Wrapped up warm, we enjoy the winter scenery as we sink in snow making our way home. Because of the cold and snow, home feels extra comforting. It’s a pleasure to warm our hands before the fire, snuggle up with mugs of piping hot tea, through the window watch the snowflakes tumble like little lacey acrobats.
I tried to tell him
but he wouldn’t listen,
keeps on missing
the common sense
we were all given.
He’s got a big mouth
and thick fists
matched by his dim wits,
so, pretty boy ***** is
too big for his lacey britches.
Ruffled some rough feathers
now the big birds are chirping
ready to put a hurt on
this **** that keeps skirting
He can talk a big game,
float lazily on a name,
but when the gang
comes back around again;
He won’t be taking a swim
with his shimmering
or be fitted for
the new cement style
on the ocean floor.
In fact, he will be lucky if
those redwood chips
aren’t made red with
and I might try to save him
but I am seriously starting
to prefer avoiding
the whole human herd.
— The End —