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Shantelle Macasa Mar 2016
Love is inhaling deeply and losing the ability to exhale
Inhaling the small details
The moments
The feelings
Anything I could breathe on

Yet i couldnt exhale
Better yet i wouldnt
Because i was afraid
Afraid
Of losing you
Of the moments
Of the memories

Of your love


Inhale

With each attempt I make, it would leave a burning pang in my lungs
It slowly suffocated me as I breathe in the unwelcomed pain

Inhale inhale

It was an overdose of emotions
A rollercoaster ride
A greedy attempt

I was greedy
Greedy of your love
It tormented you each time i inhaled
Each time I inhaled more and more of you
Because it took away your humanity

Inhale inhale inhale

It made you afraid
Afraid that if you leave
I would suffocate
Lose myself
Die

But I forgot
I forgot that you needed to breathe too
That you also needed to inhale the same love I greedily took from you
I didnt realize that you struggled to breathe for love
Love that's supposed to be meant for two

Till you died

Inhale inhale inha...

It was difficult now
Inhaling didnt feel the same anymore
Instead of warmth and comfort
I felt grief and pain

Inhale inha...

Then
I realized that i was mistaken
I was mistaken of love
That love wasnt something i should selfishly claim as my own

So I tried to breathe again

Inha...

Exhale
veritas Aug 2018
a glass chalice shattered on marble steps,
a cherub speared by his own arrow—
    do not tell me you do not hear it.

where moon boys and glossy girls live boldly,
they glow, shining and tacky like transparent saran
wrap
a rope around your neck and
stay.
for where death is present, so too is its midwife.

inhale exhale
in the dark
help guide me to the exit sign

oh! perform for the lords and ladies,
lie down under lights and washes of blushing love,
over your body
lay a rose for crows who do not sing.

but beware, when slowly will a golden shroud descend

and you will fall to your knees.
(as petals fall to the ground, so soft)
and it will part a way
(if buttery light could cleave so)
not clear but swiftly fading, slowing

illuminated faintly dimly glowing
above me reaching inhale
exhale inhale exhale inha—

thank you.

.
oh fallen child, where have you gone?
is there really balm in Gilead
or is that the mistaken hope of every saint and sinner?

it is a silent night tonight, blessed with only one star,
and i hope that it is yours.
for the world went black when you closed your eyes
and will need new seeds of light.

how did we fail you so badly?
how did we fail to see underneath, fail to
hear you screaming, telling us you felt wrong.
you spoke out for us, lifted us in our silence,
and yet, we said nary a word during yours.

it is not hard to tell someone they are loved.
to let them know that they have done well, that they have worked hard;
to lighten someone’s heart with a simple word or two.

for in this life of stop and go, the rush and sigh of a few billion souls
runs fast like rapids beneath the feet, and
it is not so hard to be
lost ,
swept up amidst a current of
mockingly pulsating restless life,
all the while being buried ,
fathoms beneath a violent sea of wrath,
a tempest held in depthless waters, a fight unresolved—  
where, under the shadows of a brooding cloud and a weeping rain,
our sorrows will wash over us.

but what good is a battle unwitnessed?
address it say its name.
stop hiding it behind plastic flowers and brittle leaves,
under rice-paper skin and honey smiles.
rip the valance off
of this drapery of deceit
and lay bare before the world the truth.

it was suicide.

he took his life.

mental health is real.
perfection is not.

reach out.
speak up.
give love.

if anyone can be saved, then
let not your death be in vain.
.


rest in paradise, jonghyun.
if you are aching, if you are drowning, know that someone, somewhere, is afloat because of you.  please, do not hesitate to seek help, we are here for you. it is not wrong to feel how you do, to be who you are. you are loved, you are worthy, you matter. reach out, for you are not alone.
James Hooper May 2019
These roads are black
Burning my souls
I’m wishing for direction
Perhaps nobody knows
They whisper
“Nobody Knows...”

Shhhhh

My stomach feels empty
THOUGH IT’S NOT
This pacing has me more
Lost.
Oh, how it’s turning in
KNOTS

Shhhhh

HELP ME

Shhhhh

I could help me
I’m stuck in overdrive
I should help me before I end
my life

Shhhhh

I’M STUCK IN OVERDRIVE

MY lack of purpose
Your picket fence and glory
MY broken brain
Should I be sorry

I AM SORRY

Shhhhh

Breath,
You are worthwhile
None of this is real
SURE
Just another **** pile

Farewell to the chaos
cheers to the tears

Shhhhhh

******* VOICES

Inhale - Exhale
Inhale - Exhaaaa
Inha - Ex————-

— The End —