The Weight of Silence
A shadow at my back,
I'm losing track
Never looking back
flip it
I feel it every step,
creeping on the ground
grip it
where I once stood tall.
Can’t escape what haunts me
a breath that cuts,
a stare that burns,
a world cold,
that keeps churning,
while words keep burning.
The world outside,
too loud, too fake, remake
people smiling like knives
cheating lives,
slutty wives
husbands that aren't there
broken stares
hidden in silk sleeves.
I see it in their eyes
the hunger,
the emptiness
we’re all starving,
but we’ve learned to feed
on the bones of others.
I was born to question,
seek answers, seek truth,
but my voice got lost
in the noise.
I scream and nothing echoes,
I try to find me
Or
just sometimes let go,
the walls are too thick,
too hollow,
I swallowed all my words
red pills, old thrills
cold chills,
just to fit in,
but now I choke on them,
gagging on the truths
I never spoke,
eye shut but supposed to be woke
the joke.
The streets are paved in glass,
but no one dares to walk
bodies outlined in chalk
victims or victory
not
necessarily
a worn-out necessity,
Thoughts that hound the mind incisively,
Recklessly
too afraid to break,
too afraid to inhale,
too easy to fake,
too afraid to feel
the cuts that come with honesty.
But what is a life
What’s your deal, for real
if you don’t break yourself open?
What’s a soul
if it never bleeds?
I saw the demons
shape-shifting,
they walk in the daylight,
wearing masks made of smiles,
and delight,
morning to moonlight,
but they never fool me,
I can see
I know their names
I know their games.
They dance around,
They dance with flames
slick trickery in their veins
whispering promises of peace,
but all they bring is war,
what for?
Wars we can’t see
because we’ve been blinded
by the glitter and the gold,
sorry far too far from old.
I’ve been to hell,
and I’m still here
When your body and soul disappear,
crawling through the ashes,
gripping the last bit of hope,
a mind blinded by the dope,
Begging for the rope,
I don’t know what it means
to be saved,
but I know what it means
to survive,
dead in every moment,
I’m still breathing,
even if I’m barely alive,
I strive
To make it past yesterday
Living in tomorrow
Time lost then borrowed
The demons knock,
but I don’t answer.
I don’t need them anymore.
I’ve learned to build my own door
and this time,
I’ll keep it shut tight.
Because the silence
is louder than anything
they can throw at me.
And in that silence,
I’ll find my strength,
I'll find the me
learn and see,
Maybe I will see the light!
Copyright Malcolm Gladwin
March 2025
Demons Crawl