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"hifi" poems
Miss Cleves (she dropped the Mrs. when her husband left) stood by the doorframe of the lounge, dressed in a flowery kimono, which revealed more than it concealed. ***** wants some milk, she said. Benedict looked around at her from the sofa. Percy will oblige after his drink is drunk, he said. Chopin’s concerto no 2 oozed from the hifi. He drained his drink and followed her into her bedroom. Once Percy had obliged and ***** been fed, they lay abed. She criticizing his Marxism, he her Scottish conservatism; she talked of her husband’s betrayal and *** with air hostess trollops, Benedict half-listened taking in the ending of the Chopin. She talked of the poor and the slums saying: you can take the poor out of the slums, but you can’t always take the slums out of the poor. He raved about the rich, she scorned the poor; he talked revolution, he pointed out Stalin and Mao and the altars of blood they brought. Another drink? she asked. He said yes and she went off to pour. He lay naked on her bed wondering what the priest would think of him lying there **** naked. He heard the Chopin begin again; she had thought of that. Time to prepare, he thought, once more to feed the cat.
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Jun 14, 2013
Jun 14, 2013 at 1:56 AM UTC
FEED THE CAT.
Fenola watched as Eileen bathed. She took in the hand moving the lathered sponge over the contours of the body, moving between **** like some venture ship of old, moving down the belly, beneath the soapy water to the pleasure dome, then out again around the neck and under chin, then whole body over once again. She knew that body well, each inch of flesh, each orifice, each smell, each loving touch. Even the thought pleased her overmuch. Eileen looked over where Fenola sat, on stool, in bathrobe, with feet on mat. Come on in, she said, room enough for two, you rub my back, I’ll rub yours and other places too. Fenola thought awhile, took in her eyes that gazed, the smile that spread, the memory of the afternoon in bed, the positions held and played, the *** ensuing. Eileen pointed to the soapy bath, come in, she said with **** laugh. Fenola stood up from the stool, disrobed, set it aside, stepped in the bath and sat down, the water engulfing. Somewhere from the other room, Ravel played from hifi speakers, Bolero or some such piece, the sound touching the bathroom walls with steam and scent. The girls rubbed and scrubbed and laughed in soapy water, each one like a siren of the sea or Neptune’s daughter.
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Nov 28, 2012
Nov 28, 2012 at 3:42 PM UTC
BATHTIME SHARED.
Shrove Tuesday. Meet me after school. She had scented breath. Gordonstone Said he’d ****** her. There was that Look in her eyes. Her sister never had The same way about her. The parents Both taught at college. The father loved Mahler and smoked a pipe. The mother Had a taste for S&M; and listened to Country and western. Meet me by the Bandstand and come alone. Bud went Along alone. The afternoon sun shone Weakly down. She was standing by the Pond watching the swans. The parents Are out tonight she said how about you And me? Bud said what about you and me? The parents’ bed we could if you like She muttered. Bud wondered where her Parents were going and would they be late. Ok he said. They walked through the park. The sun was going down. Her sister was out With some schmuck at the movies. She took Bud into the house. He smelt wealth and Comfort. Want a drink? she asked. Bud sipped At the father’s scotch. She gulped down the Mother’s gin. How about you and me going Upstairs to the parents’ bed? Bud swilled the Whisky around his mouth. The cheeks burnt. The tongue almost died. She took his hand And climbed the stairs. The carpet was soft And deep. Bud thought of *** most days. Bud dreamed of *** She undressed. Removed Each item like some downtown stripper. Bud once saw his mother’s naked **** He was off food for a week. Come on in She said. Bud removed his shirt and pants. The curtains were flowered. He climbed into The parent’s bed. Maybe Gordonstone had. She lay there inviting him in. There was country And western music coming from the huge hifi. Bud hoped she didn’t have her mother’s taste For S&M.; She hummed some country song. Don’t be long she said. Enjoy she whispered. There is no tomorrow. You’re a long while dead.
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Dec 4, 2013
Dec 4, 2013 at 3:01 PM UTC
SHROVE TUESDAY MEET.
Shrove Tuesday. Meet me after school. She had scented breath. Gordonstone Said he’d ****** her. There was that Look in her eyes. Her sister never had The same way about her. The parents Both taught at college. The father loved Mahler and smoked a pipe. The mother Had a taste for S&M; and listened to Country and western. Meet me by the Bandstand and come alone. Bud went Along alone. The afternoon sun shone Weakly down. She was standing by the Pond watching the swans. The parents Are out tonight she said how about you And me? Bud said what about you and me? The parents’ bed we could if you like She muttered. Bud wondered where her Parents were going and would they be late. Ok he said. They walked through the park. The sun was going down. Her sister was out With some schmuck at the movies. She took Bud into the house. He smelt wealth and Comfort. Want a drink? she asked. Bud sipped At the father’s scotch. She gulped down the Mother’s gin. How about you and me going Upstairs to the parents’ bed? Bud swilled the Whisky around his mouth. The cheeks burnt. The tongue almost died. She took his hand And climbed the stairs. The carpet was soft And deep. Bud thought of *** most days. Bud dreamed of *** She undressed. Removed Each item like some downtown stripper. Bud once saw his mother’s naked **** He was off food for a week. Come on in She said. Bud removed his shirt and pants. The curtains were flowered. He climbed into The parent’s bed. Maybe Gordonstone had. She lay there inviting him in. There was country And western music coming from the huge hifi. Bud hoped she didn’t have her mother’s taste For S&M.; She hummed some country song. Don’t be long she said. Enjoy she whispered. There is no tomorrow. You’re a long while dead.
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43
Her seventh suicide, attempts failed, saved, the last by that medic with the beard like Christ. Thin sharp blade against forearm, the fingers shaking, the eyes focused, the voice of some French singer in the background, the red line, the spurt of blood, the walls, the bath, splattered. Seventh time lucky, the water warm, the water reddening, the body becoming cold, tired she closes her eyes, is this how one dies? Mother’s demise with the cancerous crab ******** into her brain and ******* up to pain. She thinks on, the French song on the hifi low, darkening. That medic brought her back last time, like some Lazarus, back from the dark, the unknown light, the long night. Seventh suicide, attempts made, unsuccessful, buggered up, teetering on the edge, that time balanced on the high office ledge and that cop with the Al Pacino look, talked her in, failed again. Outside another day, sound of pitter patter, sound of rain.
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Mar 11, 2013
Mar 11, 2013 at 5:49 AM UTC
HER SEVENTH SUICIDE.
Chana, having made love with young Baruch, went to get more wine. Did she need to get another? She thought, she was old enough to be his mother. The LP of Bruckner he had brought still played on the hifi; she preferred Mahler’s fifth. The kitchen light had a mellow glow. She poured more wine into the two glasses and returned to the bed. He was laid there like some young prince, proud and youthful, head full of ideas, morals gone to the wind, seemed happy to have had her and sinned. She put down the glasses and climbed into bed. Him and his Marxism, she thought as he talked of Das Kapital. She placed her hand on his pecker, life enough yet, stirred, moved. She could smell the *** in him; the stir of a young stallion. Her long ago husband was never like this even in his youth; she was well rid of him, him and those airhostesses, those whom he said he had quite oft and where. She smiled at young Buruch lying there wine in hand talking of a revolution that would never come, his pecker stirring, his words becoming slurred with the taking of wine. That first time he had her on the sofa; oh, that took her back some. He drained his glass, put on the side. He was young enough to be her son, she mused, watching him stir and prepare, her young stallion with hazel eyes and dark brown hair.
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Jul 2, 2013
Jul 2, 2013 at 2:04 AM UTC
CHANA'S YOUNG STALLION.
Benedict met Mrs Cleves in one of those out of town bars and they had a few drinks and she told him about her ex and what a ******* he was and how he used to mess around with those air hostesses (he being a steward on a plane) and he'd even boast how many of them he had had that week and Benedict listened and drank his drink knowing that after this they would go back to her place and drink more put on some Delius on her hifi and have *** on the sofa or maybe make it to her bedroom if time and passion allowed but she talked on about her ex and how she met him after she came out of the convent (Benedict couldn’t picture that scenario) all innocent and pure and thought love had been found Benedict sipped the last of his drink noticing how her hair was like that French queen he’d read about who’d had lost her head on the guillotine and still she yakked on about the ex how he liked fast cars and women and drank too much and disliked her Scottishness or her whiney voice Benedict wondered what she was like back then before the pounds had landed on her before age had begun to settled into features and remembered that time they had *** on the sofa and they’d fallen off ( too much ***** or what he couldn’t now say) and the downstairs neighbour had banged up from the room below and she said shut the **** up you old hag and all said in her Glaswegian tones and they lay there on the floor she **** naked and he semi clothed with Mahler’s 5th bellowing in the background and as he came back from his thoughts she was still talking of the ex and he wished she'd finish up her drink to get back to her place for more ***** and ***
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Jul 18, 2013
Jul 18, 2013 at 1:47 AM UTC
MORE ***** AND ***
Benedict met Mrs Cleves in one of those out of town bars and they had a few drinks and she told him about her ex and what a ******* he was and how he used to mess around with those air hostesses (he being a steward on a plane) and he'd even boast how many of them he had had that week and Benedict listened and drank his drink knowing that after this they would go back to her place and drink more put on some Delius on her hifi and have *** on the sofa or maybe make it to her bedroom if time and passion allowed but she talked on about her ex and how she met him after she came out of the convent (Benedict couldn’t picture that scenario) all innocent and pure and thought love had been found Benedict sipped the last of his drink noticing how her hair was like that French queen he’d read about who’d had lost her head on the guillotine and still she yakked on about the ex how he liked fast cars and women and drank too much and disliked her Scottishness or her whiney voice Benedict wondered what she was like back then before the pounds had landed on her before age had begun to settled into features and remembered that time they had *** on the sofa and they’d fallen off ( too much ***** or what he couldn’t now say) and the downstairs neighbour had banged up from the room below and she said shut the **** up you old hag and all said in her Glaswegian tones and they lay there on the floor she **** naked and he semi clothed with Mahler’s 5th bellowing in the background and as he came back from his thoughts she was still talking of the ex and he wished she'd finish up her drink to get back to her place for more ***** and ***
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90
I am a practitioner of art, said Alice, oil and canvas are my daily bread, charcoal blackens my fingers, darkens my soul, my dreams are of *** and men lost, I bed sad men in my thoughts. My art keeps me from asylums, takes me from the doctor’s couch to the lonely studio, the air full of fumes and stale food and my unwashed body. My mother was a slave to the kitchen sink, her life spent in domestic chores, in my father’s bed, in the worrying times she popped the pills, drank the bottles dry. I am the spyer of secret lovers, my sister’s men in her double bed, the laughter and tears in equal measure,   the flowers and bruises all fondly kept, the split lips and black eyes, she wore with pleasure. I am the painter of other’s souls, images oiled in with the darkest colours, their features blended with the darkness of their lives. My brother sat with his demons, supped with them in his lonely hours, injected the nightmare makers with the addict’s skill, he slept uneasy in another’s bed, chased by his demons and women until he died, a bullet in his head. I listen to Parsifal on the old Hifi the Wagnerian opera is my secret drug, my opener of days, my closer at nights, the background to my daily arguments and fights. My father was my only healer, his loving touches healed my hurts, stitched my cuts and wounds, he watered down my temper’s scorns; he alone shared my soul’s foul deeds, knew my heartaches, my scars of *** and doctored my soul’s lack. He was cornered by the cancer’s hold, its icy fingers in his bones and skin, its deadly smell in his breath and flesh and his parting words were lost in the final rattle. I am the artist of life’s dark wars and ancient wounding battle.
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Dec 22, 2012
Dec 22, 2012 at 5:48 AM UTC
ALICE AND HER WONDERLAND.
I am a practitioner of art, said Alice, oil and canvas are my daily bread, charcoal blackens my fingers, darkens my soul, my dreams are of *** and men lost, I bed sad men in my thoughts. My art keeps me from asylums, takes me from the doctor’s couch to the lonely studio, the air full of fumes and stale food and my unwashed body. My mother was a slave to the kitchen sink, her life spent in domestic chores, in my father’s bed, in the worrying times she popped the pills, drank the bottles dry. I am the spyer of secret lovers, my sister’s men in her double bed, the laughter and tears in equal measure,   the flowers and bruises all fondly kept, the split lips and black eyes, she wore with pleasure. I am the painter of other’s souls, images oiled in with the darkest colours, their features blended with the darkness of their lives. My brother sat with his demons, supped with them in his lonely hours, injected the nightmare makers with the addict’s skill, he slept uneasy in another’s bed, chased by his demons and women until he died, a bullet in his head. I listen to Parsifal on the old Hifi the Wagnerian opera is my secret drug, my opener of days, my closer at nights, the background to my daily arguments and fights. My father was my only healer, his loving touches healed my hurts, stitched my cuts and wounds, he watered down my temper’s scorns; he alone shared my soul’s foul deeds, knew my heartaches, my scars of *** and doctored my soul’s lack. He was cornered by the cancer’s hold, its icy fingers in his bones and skin, its deadly smell in his breath and flesh and his parting words were lost in the final rattle. I am the artist of life’s dark wars and ancient wounding battle.
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52
Each finds their own salvation or not, Nima said. Birds fed in her hair. Her eyes ****** in black holes, gave birth to dreams. I sat beside her, drank black coffee, smoked menthol cigarettes, heard Coltrane on the HiFi. How deep does my soul go? She asked, what is *** after all? I inhaled and looked at the cavern of her small firm ******* Cold turkey, she said, rather have a cool fix. I sat exhaling menthol smoke; the Coltrane runs on saxophone caught in my ears. I think I’ve spiders in my ****** she said; big black ones with hairy legs. I closed my eyes supping on the menthol smoke, sensing Coltrane's sound invade my soul. Nima lay back down, legs spread, black beetles and insects inside her drained out head.
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May 30, 2014
May 30, 2014 at 12:04 PM UTC
EACH FINDS.
Benedict's mother stood by the twin tub washing machine lifting the steaming wash from the washer to the spinner with wooden tongs, her eyes focused, her arm straining. He watched her; a book, Plato's Republic, lay open on the table by his hand. He studied the red hands, the worn fingers, how she wiped the wet from her forehead with the back of her hand. Plato’s Philosopher Kings seemed too hard for his delicate mind at that stage, the Greek world too far off in the past to give him comfort. Maybe you ought to read something lighter, his mother said, pushing down the washing with the end of the tongs. Find it hard to read at all at present, he said, everything’s an effort. Making the effort is part of the effort, she said. You don’t want to be in the hospital again, do you? He closed up the Plato book. He wondered how Julie was. He’d not seen her for months. Good job too his mother would have said if she had known about her. No, he said, not there again. His mother spun the washing, the noise ratted the machine. He rose from the table and walked down the passage way. The machine rattled still. He went in the back room and put Miles Davis on the hifi. The muted horn, the saxophone weaving, the drummer keeping pace, jazz on a highway, he closed his eyes, head full of darkness, breath full of sighs.
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Jun 9, 2013
Jun 9, 2013 at 7:16 PM UTC
BREATH FULL OF SIGHS.
It was all part of the scheme of things Henry thought and even when the women looked at him with that odd curiosity he never failed (at least not in the beginning) to make a score usually with one of the females less prettier than the ones who left before and after taking her for the drink and meal routine and maybe to the cinema he took her back to his place and poured her a drink and put on a cool jazz record on the hifi and set her down on the sofa and she talked and he watched her lips move the lipstick red the kind his mother used to wear and her nose was kind of pointed and lifted up at the end and her words went over his head he wasn’t interested in her philosophy of being or what she had bought at the last sale he studied her chin the way it rose and fell as she spoke the words pouring out and he said look Honey I know you like to talk but how about you and me going to bed? Oh she said I haven’t told you about the time I went to New York and so Henry lay back on the sofa closed his eyes and let her talk a jazz saxophone filling in behind her voice the record turning her mouth opening and closing and he thought of time passing and remembering his mother’s red lipstick mouth scolding and after boredom had set in deep he drifted off to sexless sleep.
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Jun 29, 2012
Jun 29, 2012 at 1:36 AM UTC
HENRY AND THE SCHEME OF THINGS.
Hornbridge likes to see girls undress. But slowly. Their thin fingers and thumbs Holding the cloth and taking off. Especially The black negligee held just so. He fully Dressed waits until the final article of Clothing is removed and she stands gazing At him with her bright expectant eyes. He likes to have music in the background Playing. Jazz or classic. Gerry Mulligan for Some types or Mozart for others depending On their breeding or class. Occasionally a Rock Chick makes it through his defences and he Puts on the Stones or something of their ilk. He likes it when the girls place their hands on Their hips as they wait for him to undress. Yet there is always some disappointment. Some flaw in either ******* or waist or legs Or *** Gloria spoilt him. Hard act to follow. Those eyes. How he could swim there in that Blue liquid of the two eyes. Those ******* How could he ever forget them? His dear friends. The way they would be waiting. Her hands soft And warm and gentle touching him. And how She loved to disrobe to the tones of a turned Down Vivaldi from the hifi. Sad she left. Final Curtain. Big cancer. No fond slow goodbye.
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Feb 29, 2012
Feb 29, 2012 at 2:21 AM UTC
HORNBRIDGE AND GIRLS.
And so on Tuesday morning I'm going to once more close the door Me and Mollie dog are going to say goodbye For a few sweet days in the woods Days to sit and think beside a flickering log fire Days spent in silence but for the sound of the birds the breeze rustling in the leaves A time to gather my thoughts A time to sit and write...In daylight Come the sinking of the sun out there to the west That then is the time I probably love the best I will sit and read the stories in the flickering of the flames Think about tomorrow and the words that I will pen Yes, yes I will write of the things that I have seen, done The reason for my being here Why I left the world behind Will I miss them? Internet, tv, microwave and shower No, I wont miss them Come early morning bleary eyed a cold dip in the stream A few small logs on last nights fire then watch the kettle steam And while the world is yet asleep I'll have eggs and bacon in the pan How can I not sit in the splendour of this oh so pleasant land In the background my hifi plays the music I love to hear Hifi!!! No, its the singing of the birds And so me and the Mollie dog do sit In our tranquil retreat you can live in your ratrace world For me life is oh so sweet
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Jun 28, 2014
Jun 28, 2014 at 1:35 PM UTC
Come And Join Me
Elsa sits on the edge of the roof of the building smoking a cigarette her thoughts on Bolright her feelings on the downside her get up in the morning and have a good look out on the city still intact the stone on the rooftop is warmed by the morning sun and warms her **** and thighs and so what she thinks if he doesn’t come back again what the heck do I care I had a good time had a good night the bed rocking some the Miles Davis CD oozing from the hifi rising in the air and he was a cool lover had that way about him that make the most of this baby because you won’t feel the same again kind of sensation and she looks at the passing traffic the ant like people below the smell of the city the sensation of the warm stone beneath her the warmth rising through her skin the touch pretty much like his but softer more gentle and she inhales deeply on the cigarette sensing the smoke against the back of her throat sensing it take up in her lungs and thinking of him trying to remind herself of each moment with him the touches the kisses the *** oh yes the *** and she exhales the smoke and laughs to herself as if remembering a private joke.
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May 7, 2012
May 7, 2012 at 5:04 AM UTC
ELSA AND THE CITY VIEW.
It was a room at the top of the building music being played from some hifi system and Judy said you dance quite well thanks you said haven’t seen you here before she looked at you with her dark eyes I come for the drug aid they help me here to get of the junk oh right you replied looking for signs of needle marks or signs in the eyes you take junk? No I’m a ***** clown you said she nodded and danced to the music for a moment or so my parents are doctors in the City and have put me in the hospital but I get out for a few hours and they let me come here for the help you looked at her dressed in her tight slacks and over long jumper her ******* small compact untouchable her hips swaying to the music’s beat the way she moved drawing you in smelling her scent her words lost in a singer’s voice a guitar whining in and out maybe I can come see you you have to shout over the music’s rising sound sure she said moving her neat *** as she moved around and she whispered the address and where the hospital was and how to get there then she was whisked away by some guy with a drugged out look in his eye and you watched her sway moving off going slowly but sexily away.
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Apr 1, 2012
Apr 1, 2012 at 3:01 AM UTC
A ROOM AT THE TOP.
Hi come in I’ve just put on the Mahler the 3rd Ok? she says and before you can reply she ushers you into the lounge where you remove your coat and hear the Mahlerian sounds from the hifi and the smell of her scent and two glasses of scotch on the small table by the sofa take a seat she says taking your coat off to the other room and you look at the Picasso print on the wall and think how long before she tries to undress you and you sit and she’s back and sits beside you and says drink up and take in the Mahler and guess who I saw today and she had the cheek to ask how I was when she knew she’d been gossiping about me to the **** neighbours and you sip the scotch and look at her plump face and her deep blue eyes and the red dress she has on and the overbearing perfume and how her ******* try and push their way out of the dress and you try and get a word in something about the 3rd symphony or how you like the Picasso print but she talks on and over you like a tank her words hard biting with their Gaelic tones and then she puts her hand on your thigh and rubs it up and down all the time her words unfaltering stretching through the air and I told the old crab to go smell her husband’s crotch and that was it how was your day? she asks looking into your eyes her hand still rubbing and your pecker rising and you say a real downer of a day but whatever now let’s just get into the 3rd and sip our scotch and she smiles and makes a grab for your hidden crotch.
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Mar 29, 2012
Mar 29, 2012 at 3:49 AM UTC
EVENING DATE.
Hi come in I’ve just put on the Mahler the 3rd Ok? she says and before you can reply she ushers you into the lounge where you remove your coat and hear the Mahlerian sounds from the hifi and the smell of her scent and two glasses of scotch on the small table by the sofa take a seat she says taking your coat off to the other room and you look at the Picasso print on the wall and think how long before she tries to undress you and you sit and she’s back and sits beside you and says drink up and take in the Mahler and guess who I saw today and she had the cheek to ask how I was when she knew she’d been gossiping about me to the **** neighbours and you sip the scotch and look at her plump face and her deep blue eyes and the red dress she has on and the overbearing perfume and how her ******* try and push their way out of the dress and you try and get a word in something about the 3rd symphony or how you like the Picasso print but she talks on and over you like a tank her words hard biting with their Gaelic tones and then she puts her hand on your thigh and rubs it up and down all the time her words unfaltering stretching through the air and I told the old crab to go smell her husband’s crotch and that was it how was your day? she asks looking into your eyes her hand still rubbing and your pecker rising and you say a real downer of a day but whatever now let’s just get into the 3rd and sip our scotch and she smiles and makes a grab for your hidden crotch.
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39
It was the time when clock was ticking exactly 12. The stars started fading and sky covered itself with clouds. A little boy opened the door hearing the rain, the soil was wet and it had the fragrance of freshness in it. The mesmerizing sound of droplets amazed him. He smiled and wished facing the sky, the one wanted to be a pilot , so that could do a hifi to the clouds, but the illness he was bound to would never let his wish to be fulfilled which he knew . He stepped in the rain and it rained, just rained
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Dec 6, 2019
Dec 6, 2019 at 9:48 AM UTC
It rained
The Puerto Rican Senorita in The room above as A cute *** Henry Thinks, as he watches Her sway upstairs to Her room, giving him A smile and turn of Her dark haired head. She Has no marido Yet, although he’s seen The occasional Man walk up to her Room some nights. He hears Her walk across the Floor above, sometimes She dances to the Music from her cheap Hifi, tangos or Sambas that Latin American stuff He’s heard before, and He imagines her Dancing, her short skirt Rising, her lovely Legs showing, her cute *** moving from side To side, and he can Only imagine What else she does when The men come and the Dancing stops and the Music falls silent. Then he just lies there On his bed smoking, Watching the smoke rise And a phantom of The senorita Dancing naked there Before tired eyes.
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Apr 17, 2016
Apr 17, 2016 at 10:09 AM UTC
DREAMING OF. (OLD POEM)
You suspected Saffy Was shafted by her Brother; the big ape Eyed her frequently From his armchair In the corner when You called on her To go out. She had That, Oh I can’t go Out now look; can’t We stay in, watch a Movie or go to my Room and listen to the Hifi? Sure, you’d say, And go to her to room And sit in the chair by The wide window as she Sorted through records. The side of her neck was Shot with brown marks, Her eyes haunted, her thin Fingers flicking LPs, her Tongue lying on her lower Lip. She played her only Beatles album, Help, Played it loud, sitting On the edge of her bed, Nodding her head. The ape Knocked her door, peered Through the gap, not too loud Saf, turn it down lover child, Don’t want any neighbours Banging on the wall, he said. She waved you goodbye from The door, the ape saw you Off, his eyes following your *** down the path with His sick laugh. Saf didn’t Say that he did, but hinted, Implied; her words echoing Through the mind years later. The ape long since dead; Bullet in the head, by her They said, pulling the trigger Of the father’s gun, ending It in the room where all began; Window open, wind blowing Curtains, gun blast, midday sun.
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Apr 16, 2016
Apr 16, 2016 at 12:01 PM UTC
SUSPECTING. (OLD POEM)