"haunts" poems
What is it about you that haunts me?
I let you go so I can set you free.
You meant everything to me and we were forever,
But it isn't our time to be together.
I was completely lost before I met you.
You gave me reason to live and direction to follow.
But now we're back at square one,
And the loneliness has already begun.
I promised you I'd never leave.
You promised never to let go of me.
Yet here we are, far apart in distance and in thought.
I wonder how we'd be if we hadn't fought.
Blocking is a blessing, and you used it well.
I regret my decision, now I'm in hell.
A life without you, is no life at all.
I just wish you'd pick up my call.
With several attempts I lost faith.
I think it's goodbye, this is our fate.
I'll always wonder if I made a mistake,
If I could've avoided all our heartache.
-Wayward❤
Jul 25, 2018
Jul 25, 2018 at 1:01 PM UTC
There comes a day in your life where you meet someone special…
You try so hard not to admit it but you just can’t hold back the way you feel…
I like you.
You get all those feelings…
Those butterflies you can’t stomach,
That heart rate you can’t put at ease,
So baby …
Sweetheart with the beautiful smile. Sure, I loved sleep
But dreams couldn't compare
Not to talking to you until my mind screamed for rest
And the butterflies in my stomach settled
Darling with the endless amount of love…
your love could fill the oceans and climb the tallest trees,
but could your love belong to me someday?
Be given to me?
Can you feel the way I do for you?
& Boy, sometimes I tangle my own fingers
Closing my eyes, losing myself in a daydream
Where your voice is more than an echo in my mind
And I even believe for a few seconds you're still here
Lover, who writes me poems,
You should know I write you too.
I write about you until my fingers ache
And still after that I keep writing
Because there's just some people you could write about forever
And baby, you're one of them.
And boy who played me a song,
Sweet sounds bow down to my ears,
And the way you play your guitar…
& the way I daydream about kissing your lips...
I can’t wait until the sparks of your tongue burn my mouth
send electric shocks through my body
Cutie… with the funny jokes,
You make me laugh.
Today you made me laugh,
like you always do,
you’re the only one who can now a days.
Baby, with those sparkling eyes,
Your eyes haunt me whether I'm dreaming or not
And what haunts me more is the fact that
I can’t have you now
because you ruined it
It hurts to think about it,
So I have to block you out.
Play your songs to someone else,
Read your silly lines of heartache to someone else,
And go find… someone else.
Jul 5, 2013
Jul 5, 2013 at 5:10 PM UTC
You're a one night stand
But we spent too many nights
I lost count of it.
You're that unexpected kiss
On a drunken wasted night
Of vomits and *****
You're that awkward hi
Exchanged by strangers who
Thought they both knew each other
But were clearly mistaken for another.
You're the bruise that turns blue
When I accidentally bump my leg
On the corner of the bed.
You're the scar that I never
Knew I had.
You're the bittersweet taste in
My mouth every morning.
You're the last thought lingering
In my head before slumber takes me
And you're the vagueness that
Haunts me in my dreams.
You're the scalding hot shower
In a cold freezing morning.
You're the boiling tea that numbs
My tongue for the rest of the day.
You're the obsession
I will never learn to let go of.
You're that person I will
Never get to call mine.
You're the one that got away.
Mar 12, 2015
Mar 12, 2015 at 7:34 PM UTC
I had a dream about you last night mum
Where I finally got to say,
How much I love and miss you
Each and every day.
They say time is a healer mum
And the memories will always be real,
But neither time nor memories
Can change the pain I feel.
The pain is ever so real mum
It gets harder in every way,
Even though I know you're not in pain
And we'll meet again one day.
I fear I'm losing some memories mum
Some seem to have gone astray,
Apart from the memory of the night we lost you
The night you went away.
That memory haunts my dreams mum
I wish it would go away,
I know my mind is repeating it
As I long for you day by day.
I long for just one moment
To hear you call my name,
And tell me that you love me
And hear me say the same.
Until that day comes mum
Goodnight,
Godbless,
Be free.
Sleep well until we meet again,
With love to you from me.
My Mum, My Best Friend
31/07/1968 - 27/07/2017
Xxxxxxxxxxxx
Apr 20, 2018
Apr 20, 2018 at 1:49 AM UTC
What do you know of war?
First person shooter
Simulated gun fire
computerized blood splatter
What do you know of war?
Tag team alliance
Kids slaying kids
for virtual dollars
What do i know of war?
I saw the carnage
Devastation, the horrors
The smell of death
What do i know of war?
The pain haunts me
every day
every hour
It NEVER goes away!
War ain't no game, bro!
Aug 31, 2018
Aug 31, 2018 at 8:53 AM UTC
I remember when you were four
I caught you drawing on the wall
I couldn't get mad
Instead I just laughed
And I still have
The finger print painting
that you made
In fact I had it framed
I have every art piece you made
To remind me that your always here
with me spiritually
All These tear drops
That fall upon the page
Creating smudged ink stains
As this pen bleeds
Words drenched in sorrow
An empty heart slowly fades
Can't seem to find a way
To release all this pain
Can't seem to find the words to say
I miss you each and everyday
Can't find a logical reason to explain
Why you were taken away
Can't forgive God
For what he's done
Just hope he's
Holding you in his arms
Keeping you safe and warm
You got the voices of angels
Who can serenade
And sing you to sleep
I'll keep you safe
Inside of your dreams
We were at the hospital
I was sitting beside your bed
And you wiped the tears
Underneath my eyes
Then I heard you say
Daddy please don't cry
I like it better when you smile
So I smiled
Don't say no goodnights or goodbyes
Yeah princess your my little fighter
My inspiration, my perfection
My saviour, my hope, my strength
Your everything I am
I'll carry that with me forever
All these tear drops
That fall upon the page
Creating smudged ink stains
As this pen bleeds
Words drenched in sorrow
An empty heart slowly fades
Can't seem to find a way
To release all this pain
Can't seem to find the words to say
I miss you each and everyday
Can't find a logical reason to explain
Why you were taken away
Can't forgive God
For what he's done
Just hope he's
Holding you in his arms
Keeping you safe and warm
You got the voices of angels
Who can serenade
And sing you to sleep
I'll keep you safe
Inside of your dreams
I still remember
when I heard the doctor say
(There's no heart rate)
That line still haunts me
Your mother and I fell to the floor
Neither of us wanted to get back up
It felt like we cried for hours
And then I felt
something give me strength
Then I remembered what you said
Daddy please don't cry
I like it better when you smile
So I pulled myself back up
from the floor
Took your mother in my arms
Carried her back to the car
You were every step
You were every breath
All These tear drops
That fall upon the page
Creating smudged ink stains
As this pen bleeds
Words drenched in sorrow
An empty heart slowly fades
Can't seem to find a way
To release all this pain
Can't seem to find the words to say
I miss you each and everyday
Can't find a logical reason to explain
Why you were taken away
Can't forgive God
For what he's done
Just hope he's holding
You in his arms
Keeping you safe and warm
You got the voices of angels
Who can serenade
And sing you to sleep
And I'll keep you safe
Inside of your dreams
I still remember when
I heard the priest say
May she rest with angels
watching over her
May they share there
infinite love on high
May they protect
her blessed soul
Let the Lord take her
Into his loving arms
To keep her safe from harm
I said Amen to that princess
And I've seen you in the stars
Yeah you'll never be to far
For we are always
With in each other's hearts
All these tear drops
That fall upon the page
Creating smudged ink stains
As this pen bleeds
Words drenched in sorrow
An empty heart slowly fades
Can't seem to find a way
To release all this pain
Can't seem to find the words to say
I miss you each and everyday
Can't find a logical reason to explain
Why you were taken away
Can't forgive God
For what he's done
Just hope he's holding
You in his arms
Keeping you safe and warm
You got the voices of angels
Who can serenade
And sing you to sleep
And I'll keep you safe
Inside of your dreams
Sometimes I sit in your empty room
Imagine you playing, drawing
Creating all those games
You used to play
With your vivid imagination
A world of your creation
It's like your still here
I can feel your essence
I can feel your presence
In this place
It's where I go to relive your memory
That you left for me
All these tear drops
That fall upon the page
Creating smudged ink stains
As this pen bleeds
Words drenched in sorrow
An empty heart slowly fades
Can't seem to find a way
To release all this pain
Can't seem to find the words to say
I miss you each and everyday
Can't find a logical reason to explain
Why you were taken away
Can't forgive God
For what he's done
Just hope he's holding
You in his arms
Keeping you safe and warm
You got the voices of angels
Who can serenade
And sing you to sleep
And I'll keep you safe
Inside of your dreams
©2018 Written By Benji James
Jun 23, 2018
Jun 23, 2018 at 5:53 PM UTC
You hear me from afar,
but my voice does not touch you.
You no longer want to feel ...
So let me speak with your silence ...
You're like the quiet nights ...
where not even a leaf moves .
And your silence, haunts my thoughts.
But let me tell your silence one thing ...
this, is how the dead live, in silence alone.
And you are more alive than anything I know.
Because I, once heard your voice, so sweet in the night...
You hear me from afar ...
But you, do not want to hear my voice.
You reject it as if I were your own pain,
If I am, then I ask your silence forgiveness...
it was never my intention.
I know you feel my words that fall upon you gently,
even the distance cannot tear them away!
So please tell me at least one word ...
it doesn't have to be of love.
So let the leafs move with the wind ...
and break the silence you carry within.
Bring your voice back to life...
**** the silence, that hides inside.
Nov 17, 2010
Nov 17, 2010 at 2:01 PM UTC
Dear, though the night is gone,
Its dream still haunts today,
That brought us to a room
Cavernous, lofty as
A railway terminus,
And crowded in that gloom
Were beds, and we in one
In a far corner lay.
Our whisper woke no clocks,
We kissed and I was glad
At everything you did,
Indifferent to those
Who sat with hostile eyes
In pairs on every bed,
Arms round each other's neck,
Inert and vaguely sad.
O but what worm of guilt
Or what malignant doubt
Am I the victim of,
That you then, unabashed,
Did what I never wished,
Confessed another love;
And I, submissive, felt
Unwanted and went out?
18.2k
when the clock ticks at 12,
another minute has passed and another day has been renewed.
it replenishes an entire moment that separates yesterday from today.
when the clock ticks at 12,
a part of me has left something for good.
something that could only be retrieved by the nostalgia
of the passing hours that gives a pang of discomfort and dismay.
when the clock ticks at 12,
a fairy godmother is there waiting for me to move past everything and start fresh,
like nothing has ever happened from yesterday
but when the clock ticks at 3,
my emotions are scattered,
eating me alive.
it kicks me out of the zone - exposing me to a world of nothing but things to hide.
it haunts my core, dwells with my demons,
building up emotions that don't seem to collide
and at 3, I find you - once again with all the sublime images we’ve captured
and grand words we’ve uttered.
i find you, drowning from the roots
of my memoirs... and there I see how midnights took parts of me
because at 3, I’ll always remember how I grew with thee
a.t.
Oct 13, 2014
Oct 13, 2014 at 10:25 AM UTC
The water haunts my house. Appearing so very often.
The nights on which it comes
tears apart all in its path.
No one can stop it.
It burns as it gets a hold of your throat and kills your insides with each sip
a sip so deadly you don't realize there until it hits you so hard you cant stand correctly,
so hard it slurs your words and will make you feel what anger is trapped deep inside you
So deadly it makes you feel as if your dependent on it.
It is planted in your mind,
making you think of it every second of the day, craving the sweet relief of un-quenched thirst.
Water kills you and the ones who love you.
Water needs to stay in the cabinet tucked away
where no harm is done.
So my dad will no longer hurt himself or me and mommy.
He is not deadly just the water that kills and injures.
The water haunts my house.
Sep 24, 2017
Sep 24, 2017 at 7:12 PM UTC
It follows me around you know
Maybe it never really left
It hangs around the air, light as a feather
But it´s presence, heavy as a weight.
As I sit on the bus, an empty seat at my side
It sits, it looks at me, and it stares...
And my mind is flooded with thing we used to do
Things of lovers: to kiss, to hug, to lose myself in you
To show you my affection, to show you I cared.
As I go out to take a walk, it walks by my side
It matches my speed, no matter how slow or fast
And my heart weighs heavy with things I could have done
Tell you I love you, being there for comfort
So much time wasted, never to return.
As I lay in my bed, it lays by my side
Perfectly still, just outside of my grasp
And our future banishes in front of my eyes
Our home, our family, our lives intertwined
It tears me apart, as I begin to cry.
It follows me around, but I can´t leave it behind
The ghost of you, it haunts me day and night
The mistakes I made… The errors of my ways…
I pay for dearly, every single day
Loneliness follows me, and it has your shape…
Jul 31, 2018
Jul 31, 2018 at 11:52 PM UTC
Confused,
You told me you loved me
You told me you cared
But you're not here
Nobody's there to help my soul
Heal from all the pain that haunts
Me like a ghost,
All I have is a bunch of questions,
questions with no answers...
Or do I ?
Jul 27, 2014
Jul 27, 2014 at 1:06 AM UTC
I call out your name from another room
but your mind is trapped inside the color blue
I want to pull you out of shattered glass --
from all that haunts you in your past
you are here but you're still there
where bombs, and blood are everywhere --
lost in the color blue while you're
wandering from room to room
you are trapped inside the color blue
I keep searching for an open door
to tell you that you're home from war
you are here but you're still there
trapped inside the color blue
but, I keep searching from room to room
forever, and ever until I've found you.
Feb 15, 2015
Feb 15, 2015 at 1:04 PM UTC
She plays softly by the moonlight
In mournful solitude surrounded by mist
With the moon listening to the violin's song.
The notes caress the stars at night
As the violin sings with her tenderness.
The night carries the music along.
She comes alone at night to sit by the lake
And pour her heart into the violin's strings.
The violin's voice haunts the nighttime air.
She plays a song of longing that makes her heart break.
Her spirit weeps as her violin sings,
While into the night rises a song of despair.
The moon and the stars lend their ears
As the solitary maiden comes to play
And the mournful notes take flight.
They listen until the sun's greeting nears
And the tune finishes with the birth of the day,
But will be started anew when her violin sings at night.
Nov 17, 2011
Nov 17, 2011 at 10:01 PM UTC
The walls screamed poetry disease & ***
an inner whine like a mad machine -
dropped in a
cave of roaches
or rodents
The Computer
faces of the men
The wall collage
reading matter
The Traders (dealers)
~~~
I am a guide to the labyrinth
Come & see me
in the green hotel
Rm. 32
I will be there after 9:30 p.m.
I will show you the girl of the ghetto
I will show you the burning well
I will show you strange people
haunted, beast-like, on the
verge of evolution
-Fear The Lords who are
secret among us
~~~
Leaving the phone-booth, I was
Struck by a whiff of
the weird.
Insane old country woman
come to nag the haunts
of town
Hairy legs w/open sores.
From what swamp or under-rock
did you crawl to remind
us what we choose
to leave
13.8k
In the Midnight heaven's burning
Through the ethereal deeps afar
Once I watch'd with restless yearning
An alluring aureate star;
Ev'ry eve aloft returning
Gleaming nigh the Arctic Car.
Mystic waves of beauty blended
With the gorgeous golden rays
Phantasies of bliss descended
In a myrrh'd Elysian haze.
In the lyre-born chords extended
Harmonies of Lydian lays.
And (thought I) lies scenes of pleasure,
Where the free and blessed dwell,
And each moment bears a treasure,
Freighted with the lotos-spell,
And there floats a liquid measure
From the lute of Israfel.
There (I told myself) were shining
Worlds of happiness unknown,
Peace and Innocence entwining
By the Crowned Virtue's throne;
Men of light, their thoughts refining
Purer, fairer, than my own.
Thus I mus'd when o'er the vision
Crept a red delirious change;
Hope dissolving to derision,
Beauty to distortion strange;
Hymnic chords in weird collision,
Spectral sights in endless range….
Crimson burn'd the star of madness
As behind the beams I peer'd;
All was woe that seem'd but gladness
Ere my gaze with Truth was sear'd;
Cacodaemons, mir'd with madness,
Through the fever'd flick'ring leer'd….
Now I know the fiendish fable
The the golden glitter bore;
Now I shun the spangled sable
That I watch'd and lov'd before;
But the horror, set and stable,
Haunts my soul forevermore!
13.2k
I am caught up in anxiety
It’s something that haunts me daily
A tightness in my chest
Because of the things I know
Everything moving in circles
Nothing permanent
And the love stained in my heart
Will fade
And grow again
But the pain in my chest
Won’t fade
Nor grow
Aug 17, 2014
Aug 17, 2014 at 12:57 PM UTC
I don't know why I think about,
The dirtiest word I know,
My eyes start to swell up,
It starts to eat at my soul.
Why does it come across me
Why do I feel this way
Why was I born different
Why couldn't I just be the same
The dirtiest word I know
Is one that was almost met
With a bottle of pills
That I cant say I regret
A little girl back then
Not nearly the same
Wasn't able to admit
This would be a lifelong fear
Or a threat- I guess that's right
It taunts
and haunts
Sometimes wont leave me alone
This ***** ***** word
Is really starting to take hold
It happens when I'm happy
It happens when I'm sad
I guess the words are manic,
anxious and depressed
It sounds much better simply said
Then the real words they represent
I skipped my medication
I skipped my only step
I could blame it on some other thing
But I'm the one at fault
I lose control of everything
Of the world that I try to control
Will there ever be a cure for the way that I feel
Or will suicide finally take hold
It gets worse the older I get
I fear it will only grow
I hate how this feels
I hate who this makes me
I just want to feel normal again
Aug 17, 2018
Aug 17, 2018 at 10:06 PM UTC
No one has ever asked
So no one ever knows
How do I feel
It's like I speak in codes
For one I am tired
Of crying and yelling
Of being sad and pretending
Of being alone and angry
Of feeling stuck and angry
Of needing help and remembering
Of being different and missing thing
I AM TIRED...
I am tired of being stepping stones
Of being forgotten and alone
I tired of all the pain and hurt
Of being treated just like dirt
I am tired of wanting the easy way out
Of being pushed around
TIRED
T-
I-
R-
E-
D-
T - tired of being tormented
I- tired of trying to impress
R- tired of my rage
E- tired of my emotions
D- tired of death
I AM TIRED
I am tired of sickness that haunts me
I am tired of my own brain that taunts
Of being called a coward
Of feeling overpowered
I'm tired of look beyond the bad
I'm tired of being sad
I am tired of all the burden to my stress
I'm tired of all this mess
I'm tired of feeling worthless
I'm tired of having no purpose
I AM TIRED
I am tired of setting my goals aside
I am tired of the saying "I tried"
I am tired of ending up as a last choice
I am tired of feeling remorse
I am sick and ******* tired of life........
always getting the best of me....
I am tired of wondering "what could be"
I AM TIRED
I am tired of endless hope
I am tired of being the world's biggest joke
I AM TIRED
I am tired of being tired because you see
Being tired caused these endless emotions...
Out of me...
I AM TIRED OF BEING ME
CAN YOU HEAR MY EMOTIONS NOW?
DO YOU KNOW HOW I FEEL?
OR DO YOU CHOOSE NOT TO NOTICE
I AM ...
...TIRED
Nov 1, 2016
Nov 1, 2016 at 10:55 PM UTC
Shackles and chains
used to run through my veins.
Freedom did not know my name
Now I roam the halls with no shame.
A brand on my torso
haunts me also.
My writing lets out the built-up anger
of the anchor.
Betrayal and sorrow fills the room
but I do not have gloom.
I’m always tired
but I never sleep.
I’m also sad,
but you never see me weep.
Thunder and rain
gave me pain.
Ships and dancing
were never romancing.
And here in the freedom I stay
because the skies are no longer gray.
I am strong and I belong.
And I have known this all along.
Jun 11, 2014
Jun 11, 2014 at 1:50 PM UTC
.
*So here I am once more, in the playground of the broken hearts.
One more experience, one more entry in a diary self-penned.
Yet another emotional suicide,
overdosed on sentiment and pride.
To late to say I love you, to late to re-stage the play.
Abandoning the relics in my playground of yesterday'.*
The first words you killed me with.
The first Script to make me cry.
The opening song on a plate of sorrow.
The opening sight of my Poets eye.
Your words soaked my childlike mind
as I lost on the roundabouts and swings.
The Jester stands with violin and quill,
composing tears on his broken strings.
I sat and chewed those daffodils
and I still struggle to answer why.
I grew up and left that playground
but its the place where my heart died.
So I never did write that love song,
My words just never seemed to flow.
The martyrs twisted smile haunts me,
my Harlequins head dreams in sorrow.
The game is over.
The game is over.
© Pagan Paul (22/05/17)
May 22, 2017
May 22, 2017 at 1:14 PM UTC
She came to me in a dream,
on a long and sleepless night.
A vision, it would seem
of a world I had left behind.
And I wonder from time to time,
I wonder how she is.
I wonder if she’s alright,
If she’s happy with the life she lives.
People come and people go,
They walk right in and out of your life.
Some mean more than they’ll ever know.
Some haunt you in your dreams at night.
And I still think of her sly grin,
and that sparkle in her brown eyes.
I miss crossing her path now and then,
and holding her in my arms so tight.
How could one so very small,
so frail, and meek inside…
Be the first that I recall,
such a big part of my life?
And I hold on to times we shared,
and think of that world I left behind.
And never once regret I cared,
for that girl I’m without tonight.
Of all my past, I miss her most.
Yet I stay my tongue, and tell her not.
It’s something that she may never know,
but I hold her still, near in my heart.
My love goes out to that browned eyed girl,
who haunts me in my sleep.
To the one who is no longer in my world,
but means so very much to me.
My heart goes out to her tonight,
wherever she may be.
I may have cut her out of my life…
But she’ll always be with me in my dreams.
Jul 6, 2011
Jul 6, 2011 at 9:50 AM UTC
Aegri Somnia Vana (Latin): a sick man's dreams; hallucinations
In the country of the blind,
the one eyed men are kings
So condemn what you don't understand
**C
O
N
S
U
M
E**
It's more alluring to feed the machine
**C
O
N
F
O
R
M**
Is your life the masterpiece you dreamt of painting?
From out of the depths,
Comes Father Time to devour your /follie de grandeur
Your blissful ignorance
Your wishful thinking
**O
B
E
Y**
It's all I can do to preserve a calm mind
Or try
But I'd rather play follow the leader
I'm plagued by my cognitive processes
It haunts me
And my inability to bring luminescence
to the infinite shadows swirling around me
Don't you know by now your essence of life
manifests in the vibrancy of your frequency?
Philosophy or logic
It's a Love > Fear dichotomy
Jun 27, 2013
Jun 27, 2013 at 7:56 AM UTC
It is so real to me.
I see it's harmless name everywhere, and it looks so innocent off of the context of your skin.
It haunts me where ever it is or whatever state it is in, and it is so shadowed to me.
But also extremely real, and vivid.
So chilling, but it also sets me to fire.
I see other harmless names and I am foreign to the lands of those graves.
I am glad, but I hate that this stands out to me.
I am walking the path of the graveyard, and will I fall in to my likely grave?
Or will I break off onto the swept path?
I will not know, but I am passing the graves of others who have succumb to the rough grips of these names.
And on these graves there are things written, telling what pushed and buried them in these graves.
And I see many empty graves and blank headstones ahead.
I know that mine may be waiting for me, and self harm is pushing me along the path to it.
Still, I am pushing back and I will ***** the swept path with my muddy feet.
And once I am there I will run far away and never let myself be pushed again.
I will not be buried in the dirt of self harm.
Mar 25, 2014
Mar 25, 2014 at 2:29 PM UTC