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"hardened" poems
*My depraved soul's unearthed By the Holy Ghost's breath And given new birth Out of spiritual death This wretch is turned 'round Fit with eyes to believe A lost sheep is found And her Shepherd received My blots are each edited Out in Christ's fount His righteousness credited To my bankrupt account A prisoner's been pardoned No debt left to pay A heart which was hardened Becomes pliable clay My life's set apart Now from worldly regression Picked out from the start Made for Christ's own possession I'm purchased with blood Shed on Golgotha's tree A slave bought by God And fully set free My sins were all laid On the head of a Scapegoat Who carried their weight To a desert remote Once an object of wrath And deserving hell's fire But Jesus took my bath— Conflagration of God's ire So an enemy no more I'm brought into God's fold Carried through His door And out of night's cold He calls me His child His heir and His bride Though once an orphan wild Now seated at Christ's side And soon He'll return When salvation's complete When no longer I'll yearn For His own face I'll meet!*
0
Apr 14, 2017
Apr 14, 2017 at 11:37 PM UTC
Grace
Great tragedy suffered, Impossible circumstances conquered, The warrior walks upon the field flanked path. The wanderer's armor tells a tale, Battle scarred and partially rent asunder, A face of stoicism that hides the haggardness underneath, Peeking out beneath the mask of a hardened soldier. The clouds clap ahead, preceded by flashes of light brightly illuminating the world, Accompanied shortly after by the rainfall. A trickle becomes a downpour, The battered individual trudging along as the road becomes a bog of mud and slop, The message firmly planted within their mind. Coming upon the dark outline of the castle ahead the warrior picks up pace, Reflecting upon what would happen to those that the Warrior helped. The pace is now fueled by a different kind of urgency. The rain is cold upon the face's of those that it falls on, The torn edges of metal digging in at places, Some already wounded and tender, As the final hilltop between them is crested. The gates are closed, And this loyal soldier is for the moment shut out, A fist is raised, The declaration of allegiance given, An angry detailing of the warriors achievements and adventures shouted, And a challenge of one's path, Building in anger and fury as the dam finally breaks and gushes forth, Threatening to shatter the gate and doors to splinters and twisted metal. A long ago promised gift to be rewarded, For all the things endured, Things that could be considered so cruel, The storm picks up in force until it's akin to that of a hurricane, As if brought forth by the warrior's grief and pain finally being released, For the first and only time. These things ringing out despite the storms roaring wind, Gathering force, Perhaps in affirmation of the warrior's words. After a pause the gate begins to lift, It's metal screeching, The doors groaning as they begin to swing outward, and the battered soldier is bathed in light, Taking the weight from the warrior's shoulders, As the threshold is finally crossed.
0
May 12, 2018
May 12, 2018 at 9:22 PM UTC
Threshold
Great tragedy suffered, Impossible circumstances conquered, The warrior walks upon the field flanked path. The wanderer's armor tells a tale, Battle scarred and partially rent asunder, A face of stoicism that hides the haggardness underneath, Peeking out beneath the mask of a hardened soldier. The clouds clap ahead, preceded by flashes of light brightly illuminating the world, Accompanied shortly after by the rainfall. A trickle becomes a downpour, The battered individual trudging along as the road becomes a bog of mud and slop, The message firmly planted within their mind. Coming upon the dark outline of the castle ahead the warrior picks up pace, Reflecting upon what would happen to those that the Warrior helped. The pace is now fueled by a different kind of urgency. The rain is cold upon the face's of those that it falls on, The torn edges of metal digging in at places, Some already wounded and tender, As the final hilltop between them is crested. The gates are closed, And this loyal soldier is for the moment shut out, A fist is raised, The declaration of allegiance given, An angry detailing of the warriors achievements and adventures shouted, And a challenge of one's path, Building in anger and fury as the dam finally breaks and gushes forth, Threatening to shatter the gate and doors to splinters and twisted metal. A long ago promised gift to be rewarded, For all the things endured, Things that could be considered so cruel, The storm picks up in force until it's akin to that of a hurricane, As if brought forth by the warrior's grief and pain finally being released, For the first and only time. These things ringing out despite the storms roaring wind, Gathering force, Perhaps in affirmation of the warrior's words. After a pause the gate begins to lift, It's metal screeching, The doors groaning as they begin to swing outward, and the battered soldier is bathed in light, Taking the weight from the warrior's shoulders, As the threshold is finally crossed.
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41
*My depraved soul's unearthed By the Holy Ghost's breath And given new birth Out of spiritual death This wretch is turned 'round Fit with eyes to believe A lost sheep is found And her Shepherd received My blots are each edited Out in Christ's fount His righteousness credited To my bankrupt account A prisoner's been pardoned No debt left to pay A heart which was hardened Becomes pliable clay My life's set apart Now from worldly regression Picked out from the start Made for Christ's own possession I'm purchased with blood Shed on Golgotha's tree A slave bought by God And fully set free My sins were all laid On the head of a Scapegoat Who carried their weight To a desert remote Once an object of wrath And deserving hell's fire But Jesus took my bath— Conflagration of God's ire So an enemy no more I'm brought into God's fold Carried through His door And out of night's cold He calls me His child His heir and His bride Though once an orphan wild Now seated at Christ's side And soon He'll return When salvation's complete When no longer I'll yearn For His own face I'll meet!*
0
Nov 5, 2015
Nov 5, 2015 at 4:07 PM UTC
Grace
In time you’ll recover and absolve push those scorned impressions aside hammer down the jaded edges and sing that delightful commoners song the one you sang so well in what seems a lifetime ago You really had it you know that fiery disposition and nimble cunning those butter chords and derelict style we could see it -- we could all see it it was all it took to turn the evening tide (and rile that buck fever) heads bashing tongues lambasting middle fingers high and raising Cain on those may fly statesmen There were no rules when it came to your survival no textbook rally or common bond no structured songbird or bravado stage you either made it, or laid it “life by the ***** Mr. Poppy would say a kaleidoscope of dreams with rich colored imagery hardened artisan seams in a carefully woven motif But something got lost in the needle point something sinister and distorted took hold the quirks and street genius that were your lifeline gave way to grunts and squeals and chilling night crawlers the colors faded quickly to a cold confining grey There was no grace in the new world no retribution or switch back no salvation or accorded finale only edged platforms of blackened steel that kept you cased in a silent vanquished cell shivering cold with fear night without day all in the shadow of death But time heals all and the polish sneakers and open sores are long gone (though the roman nose and shallow cleft remain) indeed the falconer beat the widow maker this go around and I’m hopeful it won’t happen again and if it does you’ll see me standing hand on heart with that old verse in hand: he ain’t tainted or silly, and most certainly not forgotten… he ain’t loony or fixed, or a product of his self-doing… he’s just a straight shootin’ guy, who had the most of it figured out
0
Jan 29, 2017
Jan 29, 2017 at 8:38 PM UTC
The Commoners Song
In time you’ll recover and absolve push those scorned impressions aside hammer down the jaded edges and sing that delightful commoners song the one you sang so well in what seems a lifetime ago You really had it you know that fiery disposition and nimble cunning those butter chords and derelict style we could see it -- we could all see it it was all it took to turn the evening tide (and rile that buck fever) heads bashing tongues lambasting middle fingers high and raising Cain on those may fly statesmen There were no rules when it came to your survival no textbook rally or common bond no structured songbird or bravado stage you either made it, or laid it “life by the ***** Mr. Poppy would say a kaleidoscope of dreams with rich colored imagery hardened artisan seams in a carefully woven motif But something got lost in the needle point something sinister and distorted took hold the quirks and street genius that were your lifeline gave way to grunts and squeals and chilling night crawlers the colors faded quickly to a cold confining grey There was no grace in the new world no retribution or switch back no salvation or accorded finale only edged platforms of blackened steel that kept you cased in a silent vanquished cell shivering cold with fear night without day all in the shadow of death But time heals all and the polish sneakers and open sores are long gone (though the roman nose and shallow cleft remain) indeed the falconer beat the widow maker this go around and I’m hopeful it won’t happen again and if it does you’ll see me standing hand on heart with that old verse in hand: he ain’t tainted or silly, and most certainly not forgotten… he ain’t loony or fixed, or a product of his self-doing… he’s just a straight shootin’ guy, who had the most of it figured out
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65
Glitter and gold is the man in the chair with rings on his fingers and the hardened harsh stare blinded by ugliness wrists chained down by no use a man with much money he spends on abuse the term known as trafficking familiar I’m sure he’s never been one for doing what’s pure so he lays down his money flings out his cash says he’ll pay the full price for the girl with the mask just to touch her to feel her pet her cold body with his run clammy hands up her scarred legs clamp her in his ashen fist little boys too he will willingly harm because trafficking to him is a sport no need for alarm Just cows in the system of making ends meat. The poor solemn dancer the poor saddened soul the poor battered spirit angry that they’ve been sold with ***** feet and scabby legs they work to feed the king the end from him they can only beg And freedom will never ring.
0
May 15, 2014
May 15, 2014 at 4:47 PM UTC
Glitter and Gold
A vessel for water hardened soil ceramic broken forever spoiled. But gather with care, these grounded bits, and paint upon them as a soul canvas
0
Mar 28, 2014
Mar 28, 2014 at 10:36 AM UTC
The Soul
*My depraved soul's unearthed By the Holy Ghost's breath And given new birth Out of spiritual death This wretch is turned 'round Fit with eyes to believe A lost sheep is found And her Shepherd received My blots are each edited Out in Christ's fount His righteousness credited To my bankrupt account A prisoner's been pardoned No debt left to pay A heart which was hardened Becomes pliable clay My life's set apart Now from worldly regression Picked out from the start Made for Christ's own possession I'm purchased with blood Shed on Golgotha's tree A slave bought by God And fully set free My sins were all laid On the head of a Scapegoat Who carried their weight To a desert remote Once an object of wrath And deserving hell's fire But Jesus took my bath— Conflagration of God's ire So an enemy no more I'm brought into God's fold Carried through His door And out of night's cold He calls me His child His heir and His bride Though once an orphan wild Now seated at Christ's side And soon He'll return When salvation's complete When no longer I'll yearn For His own face I'll meet!*
0
Apr 14, 2016
Apr 14, 2016 at 3:09 PM UTC
Grace
# Each body part sizzled in pure pleasure in the blissed wake of your oral efforts brought forth the waves of rapturous delight...                                        Spurs poetic inspiration                                         in equal liberation                                         of desires to please.                                         Bodies transpose                                         in fluid motion                                         as brazen eyes meet.         Savor the voluptuous image before you.         Indulge your eyes in my carnal halo         before they roll to the back of your head. On all fours knees between your thighs tips of swollen breast caress your chest tasting fresh honey upon lips in a kiss.                                         Ripples of ardor                                          hover                                          by wet trails                                          of sensual kisses                                          suckling towards                                          the apex. Breathe in the slow motion pace that pulsates eagerness to the fore tumescing bulge leaking with anticipation of viscous lava.         Tickles of silken hair         against flesh edges closer. Emerging subtle grumbles in deep resonance betray your impatience . Hands tightly twine in tangled hair to maneuver the treasure hunt.                                          Licked lips pause                                          at the sight of fire                                          burning in                                          glazed gazes                                          before engulfing                                          the throbbing member. Plump ruby lips greet velvety texture in a slow deep dive. Tongue curls around the flavor in a dulcet embrace.                                          Moans release                                          as grip tightens                                          in my hair                                          settles the                                          rhythmic pace                                          to taste in an                                          oscillating dance.         The masculine aroma of heady musk         lingering there, arouses my appetite. With my enthusiasm attuned to your preferred rhythm suckling, slurping surface and dive in measured unison.                                           Break of breath                                           allows tongue                                           freedom to roam below,                                           licking, soft kissing                                           the tender hammock                                           of testicles.         Tongue and lips escalate higher         to mount another assaulting dive         deeper in the depths         of the cusp in cavity. Wetted fingers probe even lower circling superficially as gasp escapes your heavy breath; flaming eyes lock.                                           Finger dips in                                           with expert finesse                                           gorging hardened growth                                           within a wrapped hand. Thighs tighten with rocking grip. Head thrusts onward, drilling forward in each dive.         Salvia slips         fingers grip         lips dip Engorged swell, flesh tightens in an intensity of volcanic eruption ...         HALTS         assault Pace retracts. Loosened lips kiss tip. *“Soon sweetheart, your time will *** inside me as we surrender to synergy."* #
0
Sep 10, 2018
Sep 10, 2018 at 7:51 AM UTC
love...................................lust (act II)
# Each body part sizzled in pure pleasure in the blissed wake of your oral efforts brought forth the waves of rapturous delight...                                        Spurs poetic inspiration                                         in equal liberation                                         of desires to please.                                         Bodies transpose                                         in fluid motion                                         as brazen eyes meet.         Savor the voluptuous image before you.         Indulge your eyes in my carnal halo         before they roll to the back of your head. On all fours knees between your thighs tips of swollen breast caress your chest tasting fresh honey upon lips in a kiss.                                         Ripples of ardor                                          hover                                          by wet trails                                          of sensual kisses                                          suckling towards                                          the apex. Breathe in the slow motion pace that pulsates eagerness to the fore tumescing bulge leaking with anticipation of viscous lava.         Tickles of silken hair         against flesh edges closer. Emerging subtle grumbles in deep resonance betray your impatience . Hands tightly twine in tangled hair to maneuver the treasure hunt.                                          Licked lips pause                                          at the sight of fire                                          burning in                                          glazed gazes                                          before engulfing                                          the throbbing member. Plump ruby lips greet velvety texture in a slow deep dive. Tongue curls around the flavor in a dulcet embrace.                                          Moans release                                          as grip tightens                                          in my hair                                          settles the                                          rhythmic pace                                          to taste in an                                          oscillating dance.         The masculine aroma of heady musk         lingering there, arouses my appetite. With my enthusiasm attuned to your preferred rhythm suckling, slurping surface and dive in measured unison.                                           Break of breath                                           allows tongue                                           freedom to roam below,                                           licking, soft kissing                                           the tender hammock                                           of testicles.         Tongue and lips escalate higher         to mount another assaulting dive         deeper in the depths         of the cusp in cavity. Wetted fingers probe even lower circling superficially as gasp escapes your heavy breath; flaming eyes lock.                                           Finger dips in                                           with expert finesse                                           gorging hardened growth                                           within a wrapped hand. Thighs tighten with rocking grip. Head thrusts onward, drilling forward in each dive.         Salvia slips         fingers grip         lips dip Engorged swell, flesh tightens in an intensity of volcanic eruption ...         HALTS         assault Pace retracts. Loosened lips kiss tip. *“Soon sweetheart, your time will *** inside me as we surrender to synergy."* #
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107
She's spent all the rent on cigarettes and cider, so pull out your **** and put it inside her. No need to bring your polished game, for this one's a **** and that is her name. In her **** or up her *** The choice is yours, where d'ya wanna *** Say "You fuckin' **** get down on all fours, 'cause this is how I **** little ****** Impale her on your hardened stick and explode inside her, creamy and thick. Bangin' her **** hole, it used to be tight. It's not anymore, it gets wider each night. Then when you're done, wipe the rest up her back, letting her know most got shot up her crack. Next week she'll be suckin', an appetizer before fuckin' This **** she don't care, for a TGirl with red hair. ****** Poetry by Kaydee.
0
Jul 9, 2018
Jul 9, 2018 at 4:33 PM UTC
****
Cold, blue, wet, fragile, brittle, hard, steam solidified, water hardened, anger, fear, white, tensile, steam solidified, water hardened; you lie in her wintered veins. why? "If she's awake, I'll **** you." staccato words spoken like a knife blade thrown... ...with malice and intent. Her father's voice from the bedroom next door no sound of her mother. The female child cowered under her candy-striped sheets their usual soft comfort unnoticed footsteps door handle moving light seeping into her sanctuary her heart thudded trying to escape her chest as she held her breath. "Please, please don't hear me." a silent plea as fear snatched her in its icy grip. She could smell him smell the cigarettes smell his power. She waited. He backed out returned to her mother between her heartbeats she heard the slap "You are lucky this time, ***** She sleeps." Heavy footsteps down the stairs punctuated by her mother's tears.                             ~~~~~~~~~~~ The girl child had only ever blamed her mother decades of anger and bitterness the memory of this night buried deep. Crazed hard ice beneath the tundra of her life. In the third decade of the girl child's life her mother died alone never forgiven for what she hadn't done nor for what she had. The ice remained in the girl child's veins If anything, thicker...harder. Then in her fifth decade this ice became water as with the passage of life the tundra thawed and rising with it to the surface the truth. Then what? The girl child worked hard at staying warm at keeping the ice at bay. Not easy. Nothing was ever said to her father. In her sixth decade the girl child's father died embraced in his daughter's arms forgiven for what he had done and for what he hadn't. The woman had finally thawed she was properly warm her own love finally able to flow
0
Feb 29, 2016
Feb 29, 2016 at 1:39 PM UTC
ice
Cold, blue, wet, fragile, brittle, hard, steam solidified, water hardened, anger, fear, white, tensile, steam solidified, water hardened; you lie in her wintered veins. why? "If she's awake, I'll **** you." staccato words spoken like a knife blade thrown... ...with malice and intent. Her father's voice from the bedroom next door no sound of her mother. The female child cowered under her candy-striped sheets their usual soft comfort unnoticed footsteps door handle moving light seeping into her sanctuary her heart thudded trying to escape her chest as she held her breath. "Please, please don't hear me." a silent plea as fear snatched her in its icy grip. She could smell him smell the cigarettes smell his power. She waited. He backed out returned to her mother between her heartbeats she heard the slap "You are lucky this time, ***** She sleeps." Heavy footsteps down the stairs punctuated by her mother's tears.                             ~~~~~~~~~~~ The girl child had only ever blamed her mother decades of anger and bitterness the memory of this night buried deep. Crazed hard ice beneath the tundra of her life. In the third decade of the girl child's life her mother died alone never forgiven for what she hadn't done nor for what she had. The ice remained in the girl child's veins If anything, thicker...harder. Then in her fifth decade this ice became water as with the passage of life the tundra thawed and rising with it to the surface the truth. Then what? The girl child worked hard at staying warm at keeping the ice at bay. Not easy. Nothing was ever said to her father. In her sixth decade the girl child's father died embraced in his daughter's arms forgiven for what he had done and for what he hadn't. The woman had finally thawed she was properly warm her own love finally able to flow
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66
Sandwiched in layers of liquid crystal display, Encased in vats of plastic,                                                        we Voyaging in data-spheres, plumes of digital play. Mindless,          In the soup of silicone,                                                          all Myth-makers,          Pouring over electro-spawned          networks,                                                          fall Workers,           In the buzz of bits and bytes, of           megabytes and terabytes,                                                          down Everyone           Far from the wood, the brine, the           mud that caked us,           In tighter and tighter           digitised  projections,                                                          click! ‘Like me’, ‘Share me’, ‘Leave your comments.’ Messages smoothed out in polymers, Beyond reproductions of ourselves,                            enter: Deeper, delving in the mire of dream-conscious, Now a waking voice,           Hardened, digitised, recorded in           bubbles, in drives, in clouds:                          Numb numbers of numbers numb,                           mirror.           A platform slotted home: The motherboard!           To record the echo in the hollow           of our Being.
0
Sep 30, 2017
Sep 30, 2017 at 10:44 AM UTC
Silicone Souls
Sandwiched in layers of liquid crystal display, Encased in vats of plastic,                                                        we Voyaging in data-spheres, plumes of digital play. Mindless,          In the soup of silicone,                                                          all Myth-makers,          Pouring over electro-spawned          networks,                                                          fall Workers,           In the buzz of bits and bytes, of           megabytes and terabytes,                                                          down Everyone           Far from the wood, the brine, the           mud that caked us,           In tighter and tighter           digitised  projections,                                                          click! ‘Like me’, ‘Share me’, ‘Leave your comments.’ Messages smoothed out in polymers, Beyond reproductions of ourselves,                            enter: Deeper, delving in the mire of dream-conscious, Now a waking voice,           Hardened, digitised, recorded in           bubbles, in drives, in clouds:                          Numb numbers of numbers numb,                           mirror.           A platform slotted home: The motherboard!           To record the echo in the hollow           of our Being.
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37
65 years from now when my grandchild looks me and asks me "Grandma do your cheeks look like they are falling and why does your backbone rise higher than the rest of you?" I will answer: Baby girl what they don't teach you in school is that the older you get the more gravity pulls at you. Keeping your feet planted and your mind out of the clouds. Life moves down instead of forward. Bones grow frail and muscles shrivel up and weaken just like your ability to dream. Dream of what you’re going to be, "when you grow up" because, darling this is it. I'm all grown up. I am all I was ever meant to be. My clay has hardened, no longer able to bend and curve with the wind.   Too weak to keep walking forward. That is why baby run while you still can, discover the world. Leave footprints in every corner of existence, because when you're as old as me your feet will be sore and won't be able to venture deeper into the pockets of the universe. Roots now bind me to this little house where I will keep moving down. Gravity is too strong for me now dear. My skin has already given up. Succumbing to the mighty force. Falling away from my bones that lie hollow inside my cheeks engraved,with the memories too valuable lose after  lifetime. So that when this world had changed, beyond recognition, I will still hold inside of me the days that I spent in the sun . As for my back. Honey, the best thing you can have is a backbone , because when everything in this world in pulling you down, you're going to need something to keep holding you up. My backbone, a tribute to the years I spent tiptoeing across the coal beds of this life’s mighty fire.  But one day it will turn into a white flag of surrender. That is when you know that gravity has won. I will sink back into the earth and maybe start again…
0
Jun 11, 2015
Jun 11, 2015 at 2:59 PM UTC
Skin and Backbone
65 years from now when my grandchild looks me and asks me "Grandma do your cheeks look like they are falling and why does your backbone rise higher than the rest of you?" I will answer: Baby girl what they don't teach you in school is that the older you get the more gravity pulls at you. Keeping your feet planted and your mind out of the clouds. Life moves down instead of forward. Bones grow frail and muscles shrivel up and weaken just like your ability to dream. Dream of what you’re going to be, "when you grow up" because, darling this is it. I'm all grown up. I am all I was ever meant to be. My clay has hardened, no longer able to bend and curve with the wind.   Too weak to keep walking forward. That is why baby run while you still can, discover the world. Leave footprints in every corner of existence, because when you're as old as me your feet will be sore and won't be able to venture deeper into the pockets of the universe. Roots now bind me to this little house where I will keep moving down. Gravity is too strong for me now dear. My skin has already given up. Succumbing to the mighty force. Falling away from my bones that lie hollow inside my cheeks engraved,with the memories too valuable lose after  lifetime. So that when this world had changed, beyond recognition, I will still hold inside of me the days that I spent in the sun . As for my back. Honey, the best thing you can have is a backbone , because when everything in this world in pulling you down, you're going to need something to keep holding you up. My backbone, a tribute to the years I spent tiptoeing across the coal beds of this life’s mighty fire.  But one day it will turn into a white flag of surrender. That is when you know that gravity has won. I will sink back into the earth and maybe start again…
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37
Though the first carried more miles, the second day of the hike was totally and unapologetically uphill. 
When you ascend, hiking becomes the zen of endurance. 

First, you are stripped of all the pleasures of hiking. Your excitement is boiled into lactic acid. Your love for the trail is baked, hardened and dehydrated into thoughts of laying down in the sun until the heat shrivels you into an unconscious raisin. 

Try as you may to put on your “isn’t hiking just a slice of heaven?” face, strangers passing you on the downhill stride can only see your “PLEASE GOD, HELP ME OR ******* **** ME” face. As much as hiking really is a small slice of heaven, there is no denying the living-death of taking 10 straight miles to the knees under the chaffing hell of a 50 pound sack in the relentless sun. 
 But when you’re back in an office, sitting on your cushy little ergonomic chair, you long for the sweat and the torture that forces your mind to the ankle deathtraps of mountain terrain. To the deep valley behind and below you, and the crystal basin at the foot of the granite Giants. 

The worst thing you can do is ignore the pain—that makes it relentless. Instead you focus on the pain until you become it. The only thing left is the moment between each step, when you remember why you are here and what it is worth. Every time your foot touches dirt, it leaves twice the footprint. One on the mountain and another in your memory where you will safeguard the misery of your ascent and hold on for dear life. One day, when your knees are too weak and your body can no longer table your pack, all the pleasures and joys of the trail that you once thought dissipated in the steam of uphill toil will come rushing back with the magnified strength of every year between you and the present you once knew and respected enough to actually live. And if you didn’t, if you let it only be pain to get through and not to focus or dwell on, then that is what it is and will always be. A dull memory of pain, dark and somber and incomplete.
0
Sep 23, 2015
Sep 23, 2015 at 2:41 PM UTC
The Zen of Hiking
Though the first carried more miles, the second day of the hike was totally and unapologetically uphill. 
When you ascend, hiking becomes the zen of endurance. 

First, you are stripped of all the pleasures of hiking. Your excitement is boiled into lactic acid. Your love for the trail is baked, hardened and dehydrated into thoughts of laying down in the sun until the heat shrivels you into an unconscious raisin. 

Try as you may to put on your “isn’t hiking just a slice of heaven?” face, strangers passing you on the downhill stride can only see your “PLEASE GOD, HELP ME OR ******* **** ME” face. As much as hiking really is a small slice of heaven, there is no denying the living-death of taking 10 straight miles to the knees under the chaffing hell of a 50 pound sack in the relentless sun. 
 But when you’re back in an office, sitting on your cushy little ergonomic chair, you long for the sweat and the torture that forces your mind to the ankle deathtraps of mountain terrain. To the deep valley behind and below you, and the crystal basin at the foot of the granite Giants. 

The worst thing you can do is ignore the pain—that makes it relentless. Instead you focus on the pain until you become it. The only thing left is the moment between each step, when you remember why you are here and what it is worth. Every time your foot touches dirt, it leaves twice the footprint. One on the mountain and another in your memory where you will safeguard the misery of your ascent and hold on for dear life. One day, when your knees are too weak and your body can no longer table your pack, all the pleasures and joys of the trail that you once thought dissipated in the steam of uphill toil will come rushing back with the magnified strength of every year between you and the present you once knew and respected enough to actually live. And if you didn’t, if you let it only be pain to get through and not to focus or dwell on, then that is what it is and will always be. A dull memory of pain, dark and somber and incomplete.
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7
I feel your silky hair through my rough, calloused hands Your flawless skin softens this hardened heart Melting away into your arms Gentle scratches across my bare back remind me, That I am far from alone in this cold world I crave this beautiful touch, not between lovers A reassuring brush of the shoulder and a deserving look Eyes that sparkle like a priceless gem A wise, bullied soul with a sharp wit to match The voice that strikes fear into me, as a conscious into a person My love, do not mistake this weary traveler for an idiot
0
Mar 18, 2012
Mar 18, 2012 at 2:25 AM UTC
Work To Be Done
The seeds of truth and love and light are scattered all around Some among thorns and rocks or on the path, but some will find good ground These are the conditions in which our souls can be found Those among rocky soil are shallow and cannot take hold When the heat is on in life they wither truth be told And at times it seems they act distant mechanical and cold Amidst the thorns and weeds the souls that fall Find their deaths in the earthly siren’s call Thirdly they that fall on hardened soil build up a rugged wall Response to pain or suffering one creates a shield For fear of getting hurt again but needing to be healed Difficult to break through or down to deliver truth revealed Finally the soul that falls on fertile soil and grows deep root Healthy and pure they bear plentiful and beautiful fruit This can be our destiny and our lives can follow suit At different times in our life our souls can be Any one of the soul’s soils you see But we can choose and act any of these So let us strive without end to find good soil not to break but to bend Not to weaken but to heal not to tear but mend and seal Set your seal upon us Lord and help us have the strength and grace Sign your name upon our hearts as we sign ourselves with the father son and holy spirit Deliver us from temptation and sin to your heart Oh Lord and we pray for our soul’s deliverance AMEN
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Feb 7, 2015
Feb 7, 2015 at 12:23 AM UTC
Sowing Souls and their Soils
Grayness swells above, It rains glass drops from heaven They shatter on me. The glass will not make me bleed, My skin is hardened as stone.
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Jan 25, 2015
Jan 25, 2015 at 10:46 PM UTC
Ta-tanka
i asked her, does it look the same? she gave me that funny look she gets whenever i say or do something a little dim it's a mirror image for a reason she said in the mirror i see muscles, and strength hips a little too wide and fleshy but still muscular, strength all the way down but when i reflect on myself, no mirror necessary it is never the same i don't feel as strong as i could don't look as sharp and sturdy as i could those fleshy sides, too soft for a battle-hardened brain and turbulent thoughts i need angles, i need straight lines but there's nothing straight about me and that's half the problem and the other half is that i hate the softness that lingers but everybody else loves it and i don't want to be warm and able to be cuddled i want hard edges and nimble, spindly fingers; when i play my chords i want my bones to tap the strings and when sadness sheathes itself within me i want eyes as dry as my eczema-bitten hands
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Jan 4, 2018
Jan 4, 2018 at 8:46 PM UTC
reflection
Thin, white wrists. Bone white Like china And just as brittle. They make that coarse, scraping sound when they touch one another. The kind of sound that delicate, expensive teacups make when stacked The wrong way. It makes me cringe. Little blue veins kiss the surface of them, Hissing and sizzling when the air gets Too close Like tiny snakes. These wrists Have made promises. They have Borne loads. These wrists have snapped like twigs Under the weight of a heavy, Punishing love. But, pressed back together the way they'd been, They hardened oncemore Like stone And the cracks and fissures Sank inside again And smooth, unmarred, delicate white skin emerged To begin the process over. At night the snakes whisper and murmur against my cheek in their sleep And sometimes, quite suddenly, They sink in their fangs And I awaken with a start, A sharp pain radiating out to my fingertips Like a shock. Last night I felt their strikes by the hour One, Two, Three, more. And this morning a strange... fullness Began in my wrists And seeped out Up along my arms Through my collarbones and down Into my heart. Perhaps it was the venom Working But where it spread I Settled Like an old stone wall. Like the halls of a castle That has seen too much death And too many kings. I sank into myself For the first time And the ground felt heavily solid And I felt Only the hollow hiss Of little blue and green serpents Dreaming inside me And that Was something like certainty, Although of what I still don't Know.
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May 18, 2014
May 18, 2014 at 11:58 PM UTC
Medusa
Thin, white wrists. Bone white Like china And just as brittle. They make that coarse, scraping sound when they touch one another. The kind of sound that delicate, expensive teacups make when stacked The wrong way. It makes me cringe. Little blue veins kiss the surface of them, Hissing and sizzling when the air gets Too close Like tiny snakes. These wrists Have made promises. They have Borne loads. These wrists have snapped like twigs Under the weight of a heavy, Punishing love. But, pressed back together the way they'd been, They hardened oncemore Like stone And the cracks and fissures Sank inside again And smooth, unmarred, delicate white skin emerged To begin the process over. At night the snakes whisper and murmur against my cheek in their sleep And sometimes, quite suddenly, They sink in their fangs And I awaken with a start, A sharp pain radiating out to my fingertips Like a shock. Last night I felt their strikes by the hour One, Two, Three, more. And this morning a strange... fullness Began in my wrists And seeped out Up along my arms Through my collarbones and down Into my heart. Perhaps it was the venom Working But where it spread I Settled Like an old stone wall. Like the halls of a castle That has seen too much death And too many kings. I sank into myself For the first time And the ground felt heavily solid And I felt Only the hollow hiss Of little blue and green serpents Dreaming inside me And that Was something like certainty, Although of what I still don't Know.
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62
*all my life i held a dream of a woman i would love of course she would be alluring supple a charming countenance erudite, with an angelic face her body a muscular stretching willow arching her legs over head kissing her own curving soft feet a graceful contortionist in confetti colored sparkle pantyhose stretching towards me silken hair draping a perfect symmetry with spun sugar kisses wafting the scent of vanilla and candied vaporous breath lips like cherry lozenges but one never knows ones destiny i met her my girl destiny and except for a faint look of languor and ruin with a tinge of withering she was without doubt unbearably titillating with razor-thin blackened lips mascara slits for eyes hair pulled straight back jet black jelled like hardened licorice with satanic blood rivulets and pitch fork tattooed **** a vice of lechery a malefaction of moral turpitude her *** scarred from orgiastic beatings her **** became like a large wrinkly mouth resembling the face of a bullfrog from pleasuring  herself with tableware cutlery her soul a broken creel suffering bouts of anxiety like a weeping moon having  been institutionalized in Mother Marys Hell House from a ghastly bout of parricide her father, a hobbling gloomish troll while the dark veins of mother ran through her soul leaving little choice but to dispatch the parents abandoning their corpses in the kitchen like strewn litter turned out just my kinda girl d e s t i n y
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May 14, 2017
May 14, 2017 at 9:14 AM UTC
MY GIRL DESTINY
outlines of red for a head purple lines for a spine icy pink run the length of arms blue and green swirls for hips silvery golden shins rise above brown feet colored for heat and earth the mind is deepest here all things melt and meld to slide down the spine and cool to hardened action in the arm the hips support and are friendly relief the shins reflect the stars and feet ground you to nature the essence of where you are
0
Jan 2, 2015
Jan 2, 2015 at 4:39 PM UTC
color curves
where solar lips are parted and crescent ******* hardened cobalt fire licks your name off its oldest breath this ****** hollow bends its neck through thermal skies and sand scarlet waves of heat off your (sweet ancestral) hand come inside, the door is open. the answer's always yes Medusa’s gaze would turn to sand if she knew the stony glories spanned within rock candy walls ablaze flood plains carry hydrogen freight from your abyss' collapsing weight the broken ***** flowers rusting in the haze long stem bows in the cut orchestral steal blood from the times ancestral the ink has spilled and left a stain under folded layers of skin that the mirror reflects from views within your eyes are naked lights, innumerable and plain.
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Sep 30, 2013
Sep 30, 2013 at 11:51 PM UTC
flamingo / vampire
I knew a dangerous man. You wouldn't know what he was. But I could see the tight clench of broken fists. The ****** tape carelessly wrapped around the bleeding breaks in his hardened knuckles. A murderers kiss is a rush. It is a pool of water so hot it feels cold. When was the last time you kissed someone so passionately it caused your hair to stand on end? It caused a chill down your spine- quick and ruthless. I wasn't scared of dark eyes or dark mouths or dark hearts. I wasn't scared of a bullet or a gun or an ****** that starts with a rope and a whip and ends with bruises and my body pressing into broken drywall. I smile at the danger in the threat. Our intensity crumbled our surroundings. We were the flash. The flame. He was the thrill, I was the ****** Have you ever wondered what hell was like? People don't speak of the days they spend there. They don't talk about the tortured memories that keep them awake. A smoky afternoon and broken glass. Cigarettes flung out the window with your decency. Mangled innocence is okay as long as you keep it contained enough to sweep out of the room after you're done. Eyes like a black hole. Shaking desires. And when he says beg, you close your eyes and feel the fire. Have you ever loved a wild man? Have you made him moan in the dead of night? Have you ever been a pane of glass? Have you ever had a brick thrown through you and been alright? Have you ever known a bleeding devil and made his bed your home? Have you licked his blood and tasted your doom?
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Nov 29, 2015
Nov 29, 2015 at 2:04 PM UTC
Eight Questions.
I knew a dangerous man. You wouldn't know what he was. But I could see the tight clench of broken fists. The ****** tape carelessly wrapped around the bleeding breaks in his hardened knuckles. A murderers kiss is a rush. It is a pool of water so hot it feels cold. When was the last time you kissed someone so passionately it caused your hair to stand on end? It caused a chill down your spine- quick and ruthless. I wasn't scared of dark eyes or dark mouths or dark hearts. I wasn't scared of a bullet or a gun or an ****** that starts with a rope and a whip and ends with bruises and my body pressing into broken drywall. I smile at the danger in the threat. Our intensity crumbled our surroundings. We were the flash. The flame. He was the thrill, I was the ****** Have you ever wondered what hell was like? People don't speak of the days they spend there. They don't talk about the tortured memories that keep them awake. A smoky afternoon and broken glass. Cigarettes flung out the window with your decency. Mangled innocence is okay as long as you keep it contained enough to sweep out of the room after you're done. Eyes like a black hole. Shaking desires. And when he says beg, you close your eyes and feel the fire. Have you ever loved a wild man? Have you made him moan in the dead of night? Have you ever been a pane of glass? Have you ever had a brick thrown through you and been alright? Have you ever known a bleeding devil and made his bed your home? Have you licked his blood and tasted your doom?
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33
Brown eyes aren't special, fetishized, or the happiest ones. Brown eyes feel normal. Turn off the lights and observe how fast eyes change. Vibrant blue eyes turn sad. Amber eyes forget to look inwards. Calm green eyes turn sour. Gentle hazel eyes do not smile the same. Grey eyes become hardened. Brown eyes are like a cup of coffee that sat for too long. They turn bitter with rage.
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Apr 25, 2020
Apr 25, 2020 at 1:36 PM UTC
Brown Eyes
You’ve hardened me And every silver bullet you’ve lodged into my heart, I’ve plucked out, Enduring the pain And built myself an armor Out of your betrayal. And You are not a Phoenix. Your tears Will not heal the open wounds you have caused With your trifling talons. You cannot fix this.
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Jul 14, 2018
Jul 14, 2018 at 5:30 AM UTC
There is nothing magical about you.