you used to come home loudly in the dark but

quietly in the day we’d be together

to compensate

we were only in love on Halloweens

you in those hundred dollar costumes worth two

in material and tiny fingers

**** rats and ER surgeons

to me with a pop-culturally relevant strap-on mask

Frankenstein (to the dumb dudes that go to these things)

that chisels me like a jell-o mold

that blurs her infinitely beautiful walking-away

the blooming glances pairing parting lips to talk *******

caking the ***** reeling in our heads

winding round the spindle hooked tight

pulling my hard-hat plastic-green face

to the windmill

halloweens upon us get the sweeties in

put them all in bags let halloween begin

children at the door doing trick or treats

you are at the ready with a bag of sweets.



dressed up in there costumes witches vampires too

looking very scary to try and frighten you

carrying there pumpkins lighting up the night

happy smiling faces a halloween delight.



bringing lots of memories when were children too

and all the trick or treating that we used to do.

Here's a little story about one of my best friends, and I
We've gone through the lowest of the lows, to the ecstasy peak of highs

It all started during the second half of 12th grade
Immediately a beauty caught my eye, fixated my gaze
Her aura was not normal and I immediately needed to know her name.
It was in that film class, where we set the stage.

I tried to back away, even though it wasn't what I felt in my heart
There was just something about her that struck me right from the start
I knew in her life movie, I wanted to play a part.

Not a supporting actor, not a stagehand.

I wanted that lead role, and so I took a stand
We then embraced our connection, and took on life, hand in hand

There were clashes with the cast around us
Mental strains clogged the drains and caused too much fuss
But we knew enough to build off of what we had, trust.
That and a whole lotta love, thankful for every moment
That I was blessed with this star from above.

But we were young, high-strung, and intoxicated by our surroundings
When we shut it all out, removed all doubt,
Together on a cloud it was no less than astounding.
A future we were founding, shined brighter than sun beams
It's in those fields where life feels better than your dreams.

Existence was constantly testing us, arresting us in prisons that felt so grim
I was fighting a battle against hateful people, one I could not win.
Voices from outside led us astray, to sin
An alcoholic's logic, made me wanna get a bat and swing
But we sparked a new beginning when we dismissed other opinions.

She was my sunshine, and I let her know
We nurtured our beings, continued to grow
Anywhere she wanted me, I would surely go
We never stopped to look back, groovin' with the flow

We never meant any harm
but sometimes had to disarm each other
when the alarms were blaring.
There were occasions that were downright scary,
But peace was found in each others' eyes,
Staring into the depths of one another's soul
We physically held onto each other determined to never let go.
Despite the rain, shine, or snow
We've weathered all weather patterns
Our boat we continued to row

Merrily merrily, wait where are we?

2 hearts, minds, bodies, and souls
Our blissful union had been on a roll
But spending life on a bus, depressed, and sleep-deprived was surely taking it's toll
Got me drinking and thinking there'd be a tomorrow I wouldn't know.
Became resentful with a head full of dreadful hypotheticals
Unto none I could bestow.

Someone drowned in the nearby river
I figured I would join them after a night of abusing my liver
I immediately considered, how I felt during her moments of weakness by the cliffs
I'd've been so hurt emotionally it would seem as if internally I was pummeled by fists
I then put a pen within my grip, now connecting the dots, it led to this.

I once pushed her away, now it was her turn.
I tried holding on too tight constantly watching the bridge burn.
Impending doom filled the room inside my head
Sorrow was now the only one to lay in my bed
Zooming down a road I knew to be a dead end

When the time came, the perfect vision of our future shattered
I still kept fighting for love, but felt it didn't matter
The canvas was torn, the paint was all splattered.
I felt as if it were a sick joke,
Causing my inner demons laughter chasing a happily-ever-after

She would still call on me, whenever I was needed
Like temporary medicine even though I felt that I was bleeding.
Never heeding warnings from friends,
I felt like nothing more than a means to an end.

I lost the two that were closest, but they found each other.
In that fire I was but a scorned lover,
Cast them off my island,
While they didn't know where my life or mind went.
Lived life fast, one could say hell-bent
Then spent a lot of time, with another girl.
Decided this was gonna be my new world.
Although, it was doomed right from the start.
I was this girl's "soul mate"
but she couldn't hold my whole heart.
I tried forcing it, picturing another forever
I hurt us both, my mind is far too clever.
We were both too hurt from the past,
I knew it was a matter of time, it wasn't meant to last.
The concept of hurting someone, I just could not grasp,
2 and a half years sure went fast.

The original girl would sometimes pop in my dreams,
It was never angry but I didn't know what it could mean.
Shortly after the breakup came in girl number three,
We matched, the fun times with glee
Surely we were on a loving spree.

One night it changed, my whole being felt strange.
Inside was a feeling that I just could not tame.
I was at work stuck on a trip down memory lane
Fiery passion was the game
I knew deep inside I needed that again.
Hurt to another came down like rain,
Never intended despite how much I could explain.

I needed to let go of past pains and invite love to stay.

I messaged the girl that was once the brightest star in my solar system
We let our feelings out and again our spirits were in rhythm
It was a new beginning
Even contacted my old best friend n let him know how I missed him.
I again tried to hug her pains away and listened to every word she'd say
Common contact was slowly turning the nights into days
Replaying memories and the talks of forevers with old and new lovers.
We knew once again, that we always had, us.

Memories irreplaceable
I smile when I look out the windowsill
Reminiscing on the old thrills.

Nights spent watching sappy movies alone
while she lay with her head on my chest to the beat of my corazon.  
We once had sanctuary in each other, a home.
So many times I held her with optimism while she cried
Mascara marks on a hoodie of mine have stood the test of time
In her once upon a time was the only place I could confide
Arguments and water balloon fights.
Sneaking around to see each other always felt so right.
Halloweens and the moments in between,
Knowing the grass on the other side wasn't any more green.
Beds that were beyond places of rest,
Places where our cosmic beings could confess, love.
The best of rollercoasters had us addicted moreso than any drug.
I let tears fall in front of her once, regarding the loss of my dad
She held me oh so close and told me I'd be the best father anyone could have.
We've grown with time, and I'm happy to see her still rain down sunshine.
I'm happy that we once had each other as lovers,
and have each other as friends.
The past is past, but the stories will never end.

Tell me lies.
Such little white lies.
To you,
I may be,
Just another,
One-of-the-boys.
But you should know.
I'm old enough,
To get wise.

Tellin' me lies.
Tellin' me little white lies.
Tell me,
What I see,
In your eyes.

The heart I thought,
Was on fire.
Must've been,
Your own burning desire.

Tellin' me lies.
When you're tellin' me,
Little white lies.
I can hear it,
In your voice,
When you give those,
False alibi's.

I wish I never knew,
You.
And the things,
That you do.

Tellin' me lies.
Tellin' me ***** white lies.
And now,
By your own choice.
You must wear,
Your own disguise.

I wonder how it seems,
For you,
To live,
In your world of,
Never ending Halloweens.

Tellin' me lies.
You're tellin' me lies.
I wonder how you feel.
When all around you,
Love dies.

Hungry eyes,
An' looks that ****.
How hard you try,
To get your fill.

Tellin' me lies.
Tellin' me more,
Little white lies.
But it's never,
The way you planned it.
Sometimes,
There are no good,
Good Byes.

Love that is honest an' real,
Is found by so very few.
But how easy it is,
For you to steal,
Love from a fool.

Tellin' me so many lies.
Ain't nothin' new.
Ain't no big surprise.
Only one thing to do.
Say good-bye.
No more lies.

growing up, i lived on the
highways between FL & KY
either in the cab of my dad's truck
or the backseat of my mom's ford.

streetlights became stars, &
the stars became my universe
i saw my first meteor at 3am
on the road back from TN.

Halloweens were spent in the cab
with Bugle's on my fingertips,
cackling like a witch.

Christmas was an adventure,
stuffed into the backseat between
blankets & winter clothes.

breakfast was a McGriddle,
lunch was a bag of chips & soda
from the gas stations & truck stops,
and dinner was my favorite, always
at ******* Barrel, beside the fire place
surrounding by my family & others.

the highway is my home, &
i wouldn't have it any other way.

For a long time coming I have known things weren't going to be easy
the genie isn't going to give wishes like it was candy on halloweens night,
every night I'd lay my head on my pillow and cry for about ten minutes
"it'll be easy soon, isn't it?" I'd ask myself convinced myself to go on
like a parrot repeating the same old song, I said "it'll be easy soon",
and come noon of the next day; I realised it had been a routine,
a living pattern of new scene each stained in the same old ways,
the same old days reliving itself in front of my eyes.

A few nights ago, I tried to **** myself and I did not die,
somewhere, something is keeping me alive and tomorrow
I'm going to stop trying, because trying to die was more exhausting
than trying to live. I made a promise a long time ago to keep going on
and that will be the path I am on.

I am choosing to try to be happy for this year
I'd fought my fears and I'm one new day into my life,
and tonight, I will try my best to invent dreams in my head before I sleep
rather than spent the time in a deep cry, because tonight,
as lights go off and my head hits the pillow, I will be thinking happy thoughts.

I love all of you.
I'm going to keep on going, each and every day.
Until old age rips me away from all of you.

I've moved so many times
But that house stayed constant
All the years of staying late
Thinking it was haunted.

That house was like a home to me
Where I'd sit with dogs in dim light
And dance around the kitchen
Bake cookies and try to take flight.

We walked around the neighbourhood
And ate our weight in doughnuts
Listened to pop songs and sang along to Snow
And tried to get boys to phone us.

The place where we would rescue Peach
And let our piano skills loose
With Juicy Couture jingly bags
And never ending apple juice.

All the teddy bears we won
And sneaking into sister's parties
To curry sauce and French plait fails
Marked my height from when I was thirteen.

The Halloweens full of sweets on the floor
And crying at sad parts in cartoons
With all the 'road friends' drawing near
In my best friend's little box room.

The house is like a museum
A house of memory for me
One thought and I am half my age
With Guinea Pigs and our hopes for babies.

Goodbye old house, Goodbye old friend
This is the end, I know
You're up for sale and then you'll be
Somebody else's home.

Your face broke like glass that night.
I held it together for you,
skin trickling through my fingers.
The sum of all your
hopes, errors, and ever-will-be’s

Birthday cakes, lease signings, Halloweens,
the man who will one day silence the noise.
These moments deserve you, like so many
others not yet ready to cry for you.  

Listen and come back
to me. You can’t have
her. We need her.
Come back. Come
back. I won’t let you have her.

Open, dark sepulchers! Autumnal woe
whips the dead leaves, which scattering, whirl below.
Bright orange memories of summer’s cheer
Flame out in phantom grimaces of fear.
Bare eldritch limbs reach out against the dusk
and spectral winds disturb each withered husk.
Thoughts wax sinister, existentially . . .
for such we shall become, eventually.
All hallowed saints acknowledge even this,
Departed from a world they do not miss.

Unable to assimilate true night,
The nation now embraces plastic fright,
Satanic sweetness surfeiting its young
while judgement in the wings, awaits, unsung.
They purchase Chinese plastic slasher-masks
To celebrate those diabolic tasks
They wish were only nightmares of the mind;
And so they show they’re spiritually blind;
Culturally and politically as well,
For thinking there’s no Heaven, nor a Hell.
As if Life’s stunning triumph thrills them less
Than spectral superstitions they profess.
They glorify the grave, though life is good—
Their children freely tour the neighborhood . . .

Oppression that prevails beyond our lands
Bears testament to this. Who understands
How real the threat of gruesome harm can be
Where terror’s costly fear is given free?
Imagine those who fled forevermore
Real graves and bones, blood; homelands wracked by war—
Survivors, having seen such things fulfilled
May wish they could forget how some were killed;
Their Halloween replaced with realer fates:
by bombs, in wars, in dark tyrannic states.
From whence true refugees take flight from death
to live where freedom draws an easier breath.
Uprooted, then transplanted, seeking life,
Believing they have now escaped the strife
Must they be thus subjected yet again
To fear’s oppressive rule, so now as then?
Traumatic scenes are glimpsed, it’s all in fun . . .
Meanwhile, those who have lived it come undone.
Ironic morbid joke: where freedom reigns
To purchase fake cadaverous remains;
Permit the grave to thus enslave our brains.

There was a brighter side to all this rot:
In neighborhoods your adult mind forgot;
So long ago, so lost in childhood’s mist.
Of what did earlier Halloweens consist?
It wasn’t all about the grave, the gore.
You didn’t buy your costume at the store.
Your mommy helped you tailor some disguise;
A character to charm, and to surprise
The neighbors known to live along your street.
Nostalgic masquerade: the bittersweet . . .
Now, our nation’s hypoglycemic kids
Gorge on what diabetes’ law forbids.
Macabre, this epidemic in our streets:
Sugar-addicted specters draped in sheets
Or dressed in Wal-Mart costumes of the ******
who ask for candy (grabbing on demand).

Were I the Lord, I’d find it all less cute
And curse it, as the fig-tree, to its root—
Slam shut the cover on the fearful tome,
Restore true life, reviving every home
Till Treats and Tricks alike speak more of faith
And God’s own Spirit banish every wraith.

The horrors you exhume in idle hours
To haunt your artificial autumn bowers
Are real for some, who question, once a year
What’s wrong with you, romanticizing fear,
When Death and Hell are real—however near.

i love you like the polar bear loves the beach
wistfully, between a sigh
and early morning dreams,
scattered between autumn snowflakes
and flowered halloweens
with all the adoration of
a dying bride-to-be,
sowing kisses into letters,
tucking love into the seams.
darling, i love you
but it's not meant to be.

There is such thing as too much reality,
For us to face,
In which Halloweens come and go,
But the horror stays.

They sometimes call me the gray girl.

For most, it's the dye I  pollute my ***** dish water hair with but
for few, it's the cold ice water that's replaced the liquid pumping through me.

Sometimes I wear men's golf sweaters in the summer.

The droplets that slide down my back remind me
that even abominable snowmen melt and while
it's mostly sweat, it's partially my inner workings thawing becoming nothing but a pool beneath my wiggling toes.

Deep puddles, never-ending trenches to trudge through,
Shallow puddles, the same ones I used to play in when I was a kid. Splashing and leaping until my lower limbs stay covered in rain water mud and my bangs smell like the outside air.
I didn't seem to melt as easily then.

They sometimes call me the girl frozen in time

Maybe for the '96 edition baseball keds I wear in the fall, mimicking the past, keeping it's stillness locked away in a time capsule along with the same ice princess costume I wore three Halloweens in a row.

Or maybe for the worn out flannel from Pools that always seems to be the first thing I throw on my shivering body when old man winter blows his first frosty kiss
always finding it's way to my cheek.

They sometimes call me rosie

Not the riveter, but always for the hue of reddish pink that accents my nose when spring showers and April flowers grace my passageways and fill my visuals.

It's more than the allergens, it's the intoxication of new life with fresh beginnings that make everything seem smoother than the honey tea dripping down the corner of my mouth.

They sometimes call me all of these things, but I've always been known as the season of dwindle.

soon its Halloween the night of trick or treats

children at the door for there bag of sweets

dressed in spooky costumes knocking on the door

having lots of fun its Halloween once more.



pumpkins with there candles lighting up the night

with there  pumpkin faces shining very bright

  a lovely night for children having lots of fun

happy and content now Halloweens begun

(feels not as original or a truth of ideas however schemes well)
Tally of mace on nucleus of life's decrepit rung
Desperate dance attributes poison apple and silver tones
Inducing revealing cold eyed banter vaudy poems
Insidious demon tongue nor right from wrong
This is our Halloween
Layers of loess everywhere that time calls out
To the lashes of rancid social whips
Daring as shackled warted frogs motionless hips
Another death angel amasses and stumbles about
Forensic silk of life's intonation...
to defer avid devil
voiced cloth into... pathetic aberration
Masquerader not knowing right from wrong
This upon our Halloween song
Aptly a force fire and ice
That strikes a zeal
The zombie pieces of imbued flesh squeal
**** flying birds for altar thrice
Rescind all spots in the pews evil runs through
Sharing nightmare of attrition with nervous children who
Invoke ******* ghostly images of iron bound evil views
In shadows of society's passion of rot
Dire is walking misbegotten ground
Hate fear floating abyssal holds resounds
To wear costumes and rejoice barfing... who fought?
To next generations this passion we try to endear
Is an act as desperate as it is most insincere
This unfortunately my vicious evil queen
It bequeaths the truth of all our Halloweens

Yesterday we spoke and it was for a brief moment
tried to catch up on all our happenings
but it wasnt enough.
I remember when we used to know everything
that was going on, where we went, and when we went.
All the people who were familair, but now when we spoke
I know only half of the story and half of the people.

I don't know if you got an A on your test or if you failed
your presentation because you forgot what you were talking about.
I miss hearing about your day.
I miss the small gatherings and the spontaneouty of it all.
I miss going to work and goofing around because half of
the time we had no customers.
And I miss watching the games, because thats all that we could watch.
I miss going to work and talking about all my problems, because
I knew you guys were older and lived it all.
I miss the little things, like sleeping in all day and the drive to school.
Finding a parking spot or going to the dining hall where we'd sit for hours.
I miss having a class together. I miss going to Town Center.
I miss the noise in the night, although occasionally I would hear the police sirens
which was not comforting at all.
I miss sitting on the couch and watching Weeds and USOT.
I miss going to the pool and cooking out.
I miss hiding from the weird next door neighbor because of the thrill.
I miss having friends over even at all hours of the night.
I miss those quick trips to the gas station or the drive around town
just because we were bored.
I miss Halloweens at Tech and making new friends, whose names I wont remember come morning.
I miss the Taxi rides.
I miss you calling me up because you need a friend to ride with you to wherever you are going this time.
I miss staying up late and sleeping well into the afternoon.
I miss going to Mellow and the Mexican restaruant on the corner of the street.
I miss our mexican friend, the one who gave me the napkin flower.
I miss a lot of things and people. But sometimes I"m just tired of saying it
because it brings back what used to be and sometimes what used to be is never going to come back.
I miss you.

halloweens upon us get the sweeties in

put them all in bags let halloween begin

children at the door doing trick or treats

you are at the ready with a bag of sweets.



dressed up in there costumes witches vampires too

looking very scary to try and frighten you

carrying there pumpkins lighting up the night

happy smiling faces a halloween delight.

soon it will be halloween not to long to go
children at the door pumpkins all a glow
costumes and there masks  lots of sweets to eat
having lots of fun for there trick or treat

lots of happy children having so much fun
lots of smiley faces now halloweens begun

halloweens upon us get the sweeties in

put them all in bags let halloween begin

children at the door doing trick or treats

you are at the ready with a bag of sweets.



dressed up in there costumes witches vampires too

looking very scary to try and frighten you

carrying there pumpkins lighting up the night

happy smiling faces a halloween delight.



bringing lots of memories when were children too

and all the trick or treating that we used to do.