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Lazhar Bouazzi Apr 2017
Of this verse
The core, the middle,
Is marked on its palm.
No riddle
To be guessed in a lyric
So brittle,
Whose task
Is  to hold in place
The fissured parts
Of a gypsy's fiddle.

LazharBouazzi, April 4, 2017
Kara Jean May 2016
Late night seems to be my favorite place
I promise to behave
I'm not going to lie, the meaning has clouded clarity
I can't help the words I speak, they come out before I think
I keep telling myself I was born interesting for a reason
You guessed it, Barney Manners never worked for me
To be honest, I'm only capable of being Kara Jean and she is ******* amazing
Since you guessed the Password on her Chat
And realised your Smooth Ring was the Key
Past Admin's notice the Prince on the Bat
Made promised Pretzels and let her Love be
Happily, miraculous Spheres you own
Which you found real Logins are just as base
Place it closer to you. And it was shown
Just how pillowy was her lone disgrace
Try to be yourself. These Guys on the fringe
Act on tattled theatres they do not know
Ever thinking they live Life on the binge
When all this time it was just for ****** show.
Continue your Chat. She deserves to talk
But make sure then you take her for a walk.
#tomdaleytv #tomdaley1994
RK Mar 2018
I'm not one to walk too fast so I slinged along at my own pace.
Besides, I always hear an inner voice reminding me not to hurry, how I'd miss so much. What the ****'s the worry?

I always listen, taking  heed, knowing well the futility of rushing,
After all, multitasking is not as marvellous as some imagine.
Better to fully experience the moment, we're living.

Continuing at my own pace, seeing, hearing, smelling, touching, tasting, 
 living life to the full.
The scent in the air  at evenings best.
The vibrant colors, the buds gently unfolding, exploding, opening to the light stopped me in my tracks.
I marveled in wonder!

Stopping to shake the hand of an old friend I met, making a plan to meet up again, ended in hugging.
I stood to watch the sun going down,
Loving the moment~~

Then, I heard a man singing!

" Lady in Red - you're dancing with me, You look wonderful tonight"  

A gorgeous man, descending from a roof top continued singing, totally unaware of my being.

  "I have been blind, you're dancing with me ... You look wonderful tonight"

I wondered might he be in love, I guessed he must be, he seemed very happy. Perhaps he had a wife, girlfriend, maybe a lover. I was living through him, enjoying  these attributes, wishing good things for him.

I couldn't wait to get home, though not in a hurry, to taste the apple crumble I'd baked earlier. To play the song, "Lady in Red" you're dancing with me.

To capture his feelings of love, in a song.
Most of imy poems come from real life experiences.. This is one!
Sam Hawkins Oct 2018
Who would have guessed -- when I tilted my heart
toward baby lizard, perched on a colored desert stone,
she'd blink one eye at me, turn to smile, it seemed,
and lend a listening ear?

I'd said "I love you".
She and I were One.

Who would have thought -- when stone heard me
loving her, it would, it seem, speak back?
I was loving stone too!

Stone, I admire your villages.
I smile at your many stone peoples.

I eavesdrop on universal questions posed
around fires carefully tended.

And around hearths, among
cinder specks scattered--one minute wisp,
a grain of cinder there.
I love you too!

And in that cinder grain I hear --
worlds of stars, sweetly singing!

By way of explanation, dear necessary reader,
this is what a practiced discipline of
loving all beings equally
has made of me.

Whack Crazy?
Could be.

But will you nonetheless
accept the possibility, my hand,
and go love adventuring?

If you'd like, we could earnestly
talk it through.

Love speaking through us
and we, listening.
In Thich Nhat Hanh's book "Present Moment Wonderful Moment" he teaches (among many "gatha" practices) Mindful Eating. With the fourth mouthful one recites in head "I practice equal love for all beings".  This has been challenging for me, this "equal love". I like what has happened to me!
Clinton munaba Nov 2018
i cant remember when i last held your waist
i bet he does so at every chance he gets
but whats in there for me
do you think of the cold days and warm evenings spent together?
i guess i guessed wrong but who cares
better you happy anyway
that moment you seem not the shake off the dreams you held with particular lady and she seems to have shaken you off like already dissolved in this new whole reality faster than you doing
Big Virge Oct 2016
It's ...  " Hard To Find " ...
Some ... " Peace of Mind " ... !!!
when ... what surrounds ...
makes you ... feel down ... !!!

MANY ... Now try ...
Good old ... Coc' Lines ... !!!
to ... Ease their minds ...
in ... "PRESSURED" ... times ... !!!

So .....
MANY ... now ... !!!!!

are ...
White Line ... HOUNDS ... !!!!!

it's ... " Hard To Find " ...
A Mind that's ... Sound ...
and ... Doesn't buy ...
Coc' by ... The Ounce ... !!!!!

Such ... Chemical Highs ...
are now ... Supplied ...
to kids ... as if ...
being high's ... Just Fine ... ?!?

It's ... Joked about ...

from scripts of ... rhyme ...
to TV Shows ... Before ... bedtime ... !?!

Are they saying ... Refuse ... ?!?
or .... Give Them ... A TRY ... !?!

I'm a bit confused ... ???

Is it ... Wrong or ... Right ... ?!?

to take drugs ... that ...
could take ... your life ... ?!?

or .... Even WORSE .... !!!
that of ... YOUR CHILD ... !!!!

As I said before ...
I'm Really ... Not Sure ... ???

because so many
choose to ...................................................... ignore

Until ... Drug HEAVIES ...
reach their ... door ... !!!!

See ... it's hard to find ...
some ... Peace of Mind ...
if you're ... the type ...
who is ... Inclined ...
to think of ... MORE ...
than ... getting high ...

I guess ... that's me ... !?!

Someone ... who sees ...
that ... Peace of Mind ...
is worth ... More Than ...
a ... Stack of Cash ... !!!!!!

Finding ... Peace of Mind ...
Helps me ... unwind ...........................................................

and helps me write ...
my thoughts ... in rhyme ...

Thoughts that ... make ...
my mind state ... break ...
into ... A Place ...
that's ... NOT SO ... great ... !!!

One that leads ...
to War ... NOT ... Peace ...

A place I find
but choose to .................................................................­.......................... release ...........................

because of what ...
it breeds ... in me ...

A mind inclined ...
to get ... ANGRY ... !!!!!
about the ways ... Societies ...
Keep Damaging ... Humanity ... !?!

from ... Relationships ...
that now ... Don't Click ...
without ... Fake Bits ...
or things that ... Bling ... ?!?

to those who ... " think " ...
Thinking's .... A SIN ... ?!!!?

My mind ...
like ... The World ...

Constantly ...... spins .................................................................­.................................................................­

When I observe ....
how people .... live ....

So ....
Peace of Mind ...
is ... " Hard to Find " ... !!!!!

If you're ... Inclined ...
to ... Read the ... SIGNS ... !!!

Many ............. are NOT ... !!!

So will get ... SHOCKED ...
when what they see ....
CAN'T BE ... Denied ... !!!!!!!!

Their eyes .... will then be ...
Opened ... WIDE ... !!!!!!!!!!

when fate decides ...
to END ... their ride ...

NO MORE ... " Good Times " ..
or ... POSITIVE ... Vibes ...
when those who've ... PROSPERED ... !!!

have to ... COLLIDE ... !!!
with those they've ... tried to ...

" Conquer " ... and ... " Divide "

What is this ... place ... ?

Could the ... " Matrix " ... ?
be it's name ... !?! ...

Where ... " Politics " ...
CONTROLS ... the game ... ?!?

Well i'll ... Explain this ....
through this ... Simple Script ...
for those who'll claim
that i'm ... " Quite Insane ' ... !!!!!!!

See ... " Poly " ... can mean
kind of like ... " Complex " ...

Or ... More Than ... one ...

and a Tick is ... YES ...

A BLOODSUCKING ... Insect ... !!!!!

So Yes ... You've guessed ...

We've got ... PROBLEMS ... !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

when the Matrix ... is set ...
and ... CLEARLY RUN ... !!!!
by ... MANY ... of them ... !!!!

So USE ... Your Head ...
" HEED " ... what i've said ... !!!

Do Government Sects ...
Really Do ... what's ... " Best " ...
for those with ... "less" ...

Or just ... "PROTECT" ...
"Their Own" ... interests ... ?!?

See ....
Peace of Mind ...
is ... " Hard to Find " ... !!!

If you ... " Listen and Observe " ...
and Dis-sect ... what you learn ...

If you ... turn a blind eye ...

You may get ... BURNED ... !?!

So ...
PLEASE ... Be Wise ... !!!
and Remember ... these words ... !!!

What's ... " Good For " ... YOU ...
May Be ... " Good For " ... ME TOO ... !!!

So ....
Don't You ... " Think " ... !!!

I'm ...
Preaching ... or ... Teaching ... !!!!!

I'm simply ... " Speaking " ...
and ... Making ... " Links " ...

That ...
Help me ... " Find " ...
Some ... " Peace of Mind " ...
through words I ... Rhyme ...
when I sit and ... Write ...

But ...
Truth be told ...
as time ... unfolds .......................................

The people of the world ...
are losing ... " Their Souls " ...

and ....
MUCH MUCH ... Worse ... !!!!

are ... TAKING LIVES ... !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

which I guess is ... " Why " ... ???
when I ... Think about ... Life ...

Some ....
" Peace of Mind " ...

is ......

... " Hard To Find " ...
it's getting Harder & Harder .... to find it ... but Keep On Trying !!!!!!
Big Virge Apr 2017
This ... Disrespect thing ...
is ... OUT OF CONTROL ... !!!

from work to ... Street Corners ...
to ... most peoples' ... " Homes " ... !!!

My Poetry .... Roams .............................
just like ... " Mobile Phones " ...

to send out ... " This Vibe " ...

Disrespect ... NEEDS TO ... die ... !!!!!

We NEED TO ... " Respect " ...
This Thing ... we call ... " Life " ...

LOVE ... One Another ... !!!

is what's ... Right ... !!!

Take things ... in your stride ...
DISMISS ...................................... foolish pride

cos' ... Pride like they say ...
comes before ... A Fall ... !!!

and next thing ...
You've guessed it ...
You're facing ... A WALL ...

A wall ... FILLED WITH ... Bullies ... !!!
just ready to .... BRAWL ... !!!!!

But bullies ... are Dummies ...
whose thought waves are ... "small" ...

Like those who believe ...
in avoiding ... School Halls ... ?!?

That line's ... for those kids ...
with ... SLEEPLESS ... Eyelids ... !!!

ALWAYS ... think of ... THIS

A Bully is .... weak ... !!!

So Don't ... lose your sleep ... !!!

cos' bullies ... DON'T THINK ...
of the ... " Sows " ... that they reap ... ?!?

OKAY ...
Yes I mean ...
They'll reap ... what they sow ... !!!

Well ... ?
Maybe I don't ... ???

But ...
One Thing ... I KNOW ... !!!

IS ... most bullies ... Don't See ...
that the ... Sickness ... they keep ...

is REALLY ... A Sickness ...
that slowly ...... just Creeps ...

A Sickness ...
That'll give em' ...

YES ...  
One ... " FINAL " ... Sleep.

and this may be ... " Why "... ?
Our Youth ......
Die on streets ..... !!!

The Cycle's ... Complete ...
from Rappers who talk ...
about ... Killing Emcees ... ?!?

to crimes some ... " Commit " ...
Against ... " Humanity " ...

I'm looking for ... " Peace " ...
in places ... I be ...

But let's get things ... STRAIGHT ...
Don't come ... Pushing Me ... !!!!!

Be ... Nice ...
and ... Believe Me ...
I'll be ... Nice to you ... !!!

I may ... turn my cheek ....
if you give me ... Abuse ... ?

But .... !!!!!

That's cos' I choose ...
NOT TO ... act the ... " Fool " ...

but .... Anything's Possible ...
I've got ... Two Hands Too ... !!!!!

I put that verse in ....

to PROVE ... Peace ...
Can Be ... COOL ... !!!

But everyone's temper ...
has Boundaries Too ... !!!!!

So ... what do you do ... ?
when THUGS ... approach you ... ?!?

Well this ...
I CAN'T ... tell you ...
cos' ... I am NOT ... You ... !!!

I'm simply ... Advising ...

Fighting NEEDS ...  " Downsizing " .... !!!!

But .....
This thing ... RESPECT ...

Really NEEDS ...
An ... UPRISING ... !!!!!

cos' Violence ... INFECTS ...
and ... CANNOT ... Protect ...

The world and ...
It's ... People ...

So take time and ... " Check " ...
The thoughts I ... " Collect " ...

and take time ... Before ...

Dishing out ....

" Disrespect " ....
This piece speaks for itself .... It's easy to Disrespect, however, sometimes what's harder to achieve, is better for Humanity
I'm on a train.

One of those red ones with black trimmed windows you can imagine rolling through the suburbs on the way to NYC. Not a subway car but a classier vintage with proper rows of cushioned seats and a lever to pull if there is an emergency. There are sparse shrubberies on one side of the tracks and the ocean on the other. Young trees and bushes stroll by.  A little wind is pushing off the ocean, massaging the car ever so gently back and forth as we move along. A gentle click-clack is on the tips of our ears.

We got on together. I hadn't known you for very long but the connection was stronger than anything I had ever felt or have since. You practically sat on top of me for the first few miles. Couldn't keep your hands off me,  staring in my eyes like you were searching for something lost but you couldn't remember what. The edges of your lips turned upwards permanently as if you were always at the verge of a laugh. You interlaced my fingers with yours and held on like you would be ripped away if your grip loosened for even a second. Slender fingers holding so tightly that they were becoming red.

You were excited to to be riding with me, about where we were going and all the things we would do when we got there. I would see you peer out of the corner of your eye, then lean over to brush your soft cheek against my budding stubble. Kissing and gently biting my lips insatiably. The suns rays coming in at an angle and lighting up your perfect smile and dimple.

I had to remind you we were in public.

I was lost in your blonde curls and the incense of your neck. I had fallen incredibly hard and so fast that my face hurt from smiling and my heart beat with vibrations I had never known. Not even a whiff of anxiety or neurosis. Some of the best memories of my life, as fleeting as they turned out to be.

I yawned and you put your finger in my mouth. I bent over to tie my shoe and you would poke my **** and laugh with your own reflection in the window, like this was the first and best joke of all time. Maybe it was and maybe it is.

The waiter came and informed us that a thing called "the bar car" existed. We both jumped at the idea. I didn't exactly notice at the time, during our excitement, but that's when the train started going faster and everything out the windows began to blur.

The bar car was a wild ride and we took advantage of our lo'cal. All kinds of fine wine, liquors and illicit substances were available. We tried them all. You were beautiful, your laugh infecting everyone around you, I was charming and held a captive audience.   It was a dark, loud and glorious blur. We were the life of the party and it chugged on till dawn.

We woke up in our seats, disheveled and discombobulated. It was dark out already. Did we sleep through the entire day? The train was slowing down, maybe approaching a station. The party was amazing but we were certainly paying the price for the black out. You moved over to the seat across from me to have some more space and lay down. I saw myself in the reflection. My hat, charm and smile from the night before had vanished. I must have left them in the bar car the night before.
      You had changed, beauty uninterrupted but different somehow. I couldn't put my finger on it. Irritated maybe? I invited you to cuddle and battle the hangover together but you ignored me. Like you couldn't hear me or didn't want to. I decided to let you be.

I got up to use the bathroom and thought I would go look for my scattered belongings. Maybe I could find a scrap of leftover dignity while you rested. I inquired to the conductor who directed me to the bartender in the bar car. He hadn't changed a bit, somehow untouched and unaffected by last nights antics that had effected me so dramatically.  Same black suspenders and white pressed shirt with impeccably slicked hair. I asked him what happened and if I had an open tab. While slowly polishing a rocks glass he looked up and made eye contact for a split second before looking away.
He said:  "Oh the bar car takes its toll. In the end we all end up paying one way or another". I still don't know what he meant by that or if he knew.
      I asked him if he found my hat and he said he would check the camera. We walked in to a small back room, while he was reviewing the tape, over his shoulder I noticed a tragedy.

We were drunk. I was going on to a group of new friends on one side of the bar, they were hanging on my words and I was eagerly explaining whatever nonsense they were drooling over. You were in the corner wearing that red dress I love, with your hair up in a tight bun. A few curls had escaped and brushed your high cheekbones, a thin line of pearls dancing delicately across your perfectly symmetrical collar. You were stunning and inebriated, swaying with each bump and motion of the train. A man wearing my hat put his hand on your side to keep you from swaying over and then he left it there.
I took a sharp breath.

It looked like you put your hand on his hand to move it but then it stayed and you both swayed together. As the air left my lungs and the blood drained out of my face I watched your lips touch the strangers. A small piece of my soul slipped away forever. I couldn't watch any further. When I asked the bartender how long it went on he fidgeted for a moment and uncomfortably muttered "quite some time". I never found my hat or the other part of me that left that day.  

The train slowed. I walked to the back, as far away from you as I could get, in utter disbelief. How could you? I thought to myself.
I mourned the loss of the you as I knew you yesterday, quietly and to myself. A tear  escaped my eye and rolled down my now fully formed stubble as I fell in to a random seat in mild shock. There were a few passengers back there so I had to pull together relatively quickly. After gaining some composure I knew it was time to get off. I knew we could never get back to yesterday morning though I would have said or done anything to do so.

The train had stopped. I went back to my seat and you were sleeping. I took my coat and gathered my things. The conductor looked at me confused as to why I would leave something so magnificent, I assume he had no idea what had transpired.   

I walked to the rear of the car and slid the door open slower than required. I stepped to the stairs and put one foot down on the step and the other on the ground. I stopped, rooted with my hand on the railing, lingering between two very different paths.
     I knew that it was time to get off, I knew this was the sensible thing to do, that I couldn't get past this offense regardless of how I had felt earlier the day before. The whistle screamed from the locomotive. The conductor looked at me and shook his head, I'm not sure if he was trying to tell me to stay or go but a decision had to be made.

The train lurched forward and I watched as the station slip away slowly. I sat in between the cars for a while and watched the ocean and birds. With a heavy heart and shoes I walked back to my seat. You were waiting. Crying. You knew. The bartender had told you. You didn't mean do do it, didn't realize what you were doing and thought it was me. He was wearing my hat and the whole world was blurry and dark.

I believed you. Self anguish mixed with alcohol was dripping from your pores. I knew you didn't mean it and were drunk, but could I ever forgive you or trust you again?

I loved you still.

I caught a glimpse of my reflection, a weaker version of myself looked back. As if an invisible chip in my teeth had developed and my shoulders lowered. The charming, confident man from the bar car the day before had been replaced. Something was off but not enough for anyone else to notice, just enough to know a change has happened.
       The train started to pick up speed again as we distanced ourselves from the station.  I second guessed my decision to stay but I didn't look back.

I found the man with my hat and punished him with a few blows in the dark. He knew he ****** up, apologized and took the beating like a man. I never got the hat back.

The engineer announced that we would be going through a tunnel soon and to turn on our lights and keep our hands in the windows.

It would be dark.  

We stayed away from the bar car for a while but the draw was irresistible. After a few hours we were there again but you never left my side.  Then you did. I was looking for you but you would disappear and not answer me when I called you name. The tunnel went deeper and darker and I didn't know where you were and I suspected you liked it that way. The train began to slow down again as we exited the tunnel.

I finally found you back at our seat, you had moved one row away from me. I asked you to come back, tried to hold your hands but you pulled away with vehemence. When I came back from the bathroom you had moved another row farther.
I knew I was losing you.
I begged you to return but you told me calmly that it was time for you to get off. At some point in the tunnel you had decided that you didn't want to go anymore . Your mind was made. You were going to catch another train at the next station.

When the train stopped I thought for sure you would reconsider but you didn't. Didn't even give it a thought. You just grabbed your coat and hat with one big bag under your arm. You kissed me on the cheek like a french stranger and were off. Going somewhere else on a different train. Just like that.

I rode the rails for quite some time by myself , many people getting on and getting off, passing me by. Every once in a while I would think I saw you at a station or in a **** though the window of another train. I often thought I could smell you but when I breathed deeper it was always gone. A ghost dancing on the edge of my senses.

A young girl in a headband got on the train. She was listening to headphones and dancing to herself as she bobbed along. She sat down in the seat next to me flashing a smile. She had a wedding ring on and I dismissed her immediately.  She didn't move from the seat or stop glancing my way. Eventually she confessed that she wanted to talk. I told her I wasn't interested but she persisted.  I hadn't talked to anyone on the train for quite some time and after some more mild persistence, I gave in.

We had a lot in common. We were both riding alone, desperately wanted attention and were thrilled to receive some.  After a few laughs she slid her hand in to mine and interlaced her fingers. I left it there. It was warm, comforting and wrong. She was married but I had been riding alone so long it felt good to have some company. She stayed and we talked. She was broken and I had a knack for fixing things. After a few hours of dramatic conversation I fell asleep with her head on my shoulder.

When I woke up  the train was flying up the track on the side of a mountain. Trees and rocks were a blur of green and grey. The engineer must be trying to make up for lost time I thought to myself.

The girl was asleep with her head on my lap. I looked down at her hand and the rings were gone. I woke her briefly to ask where they went. She said she didn't need them anymore and had thrown  them out the window.  She could of sold them, I said, but she said she just wanted them gone so she could be mine and fell back to sleep.  All of a sudden I couldn't breath. This train was roaring down the tracks, the once gentle click clack had become a loud hum. Suddenly too loud. This girl in my lap who had just gotten on the train wanted to stay. I considered her for a while as she looked up at me with big blue eyes, shining and wet, like a puppy in the shelter, terrified of rejection and desperate to be adopted.

At the peak of the mountain, just when the train began to even out, you waltzed back in to the car with a champagne flute in one hand and your bag in the other.

I don't know when or where you got back on, must have been a few stations ago when I stopped looking for you. Maybe you were wearing a disguise, who knows what you had been up to while you were gone. I'm not sure how long you were away but it was quite some time. That you had been through something was obvious, a new wrinkle had formed on your brow and you're once confident stride had changed to a cautious stroll. What actually happened out there I don't know.  I never asked and I don't want answers.

You looked at me and smiled. It was good to see that smile, like sun on my face on a brisk day.  You took a step toward me and then I looked down in my lap at the girl at the same time you did. I looked up. You and your smile were gone.

Everything I had begun to feel for this broken, head banded girl in my lap dried up like a puddle in  the dessert.  I quietly and gently nudged her awake and told her I had to use the bathroom. She put her head down on my coat and fell back into what ever trance she had been in, eyelids gently fluttering, eyes searching beneath them for what I would never give her.

I dashed up the isle and threw open the door, almost shattering the glass. The conductor glared at me and rolled his eyes as I barged past to the space between the cars.

There you were. Standing on the stairs with your head out the opening. The wind was blowing your perfectly formed curls around your head like a blonde explosion of familiarity. I yelled your name and you dove in to me. My senses erupted, my mind went numb as the train was nearing another station and I inhaled your essence greedily.

We moved to another car. I abandoned my coat with the married girl and never looked back. I hope she found what she was looking for. I  never could have been the answer she was so desperately seeking but I know I  helped steer her towards it.

You told me you had encountered some other people out there on the rails and they had reminded you of what we had when we first left the station. I never forgot.  

The train started to rock and get going again. We were back in the bar car and starting to brown out. We had to get off of this train right ******* now. In a desperate moment we looked at each other and put our hands, together, on the emergency brake cord. I looked in your eyes with your hand on top of mine. You kissed me while yanking down on the cord. Time slowed, the breaks squealed and everything exploded throwing luggage, people and the entire contents of the bar car in to a nondiscriminatory chaos . We got up off the ground, ran to the end of the car, dove off the side in to a soft patch of grass and rolled down a small incline. We watched as the conductor sifted through  the mess and interrogated the passengers, trying to ferret out the party responsible for pulling the brake. He spotted us off the side of the tracks and shook his fist while shouting every conceivable obscenity combination.

We laughed, held each other in the grass and kissed deeply.

We watched the train pick up speed and disappear in to the hills as relief spread over me.

You interlaced your fingers in to mine and we both looked out to where the tracks disappeared into the horizon, wondering how far of a walk it was to the next station.
empty seas Jan 12
i was pacing back and forth
wondering how i could tell you
how amazing and awesome you are
oh, but i knew

i knew your mind is shut
you think your value lies with him
he’s your lifeboat with a leaky bottom
you’re drowning, not trying to swim

so please do what’s best
for your health and your heart
you’ve probably guessed what i’ll say
but i still think it’s a start


you’re way to good for him
the shining star you are
please take care of yourself
and go say au revior

i want you to be okay
but he just makes you feel like ****
i know you’re in love with him
but please just go do it

dump his ***.
this isn’t the best poem I’ve written, but it really gets the point across, hopefully

for everyone who’s in a ****** relationship, get out of it. You may love them, but they’ll only hurt you, and you deserve way better than that
rebecca Sep 2018
YouTube videos replace my creepy, old, Chemistry teacher.
I can't keep up in French, and don't ask if I can understand: I can't.
AP World History might put me to sleep in a coffin with all this stress.
I'm much too anxious to be my old, creative self for English class.
Who would have guessed that I look forward to Algebra II,
where things are somehow simple--
where black and white puzzles can be actually be solved.
I'm so stressed I can't do anything to stop being like this
I should be studying.,
I should be reading,
but here I am about to have a mental breakdown
because I'm so **** stressed!
I'm exhausted because I stay up too late,
due to the fact that I'm literally drowning in a sea of papers and books.
I just want to sleep,
but I can't,
I'm too busy worrying about my next exam.
Sorry, but I really needed to write something. I know it's bad, but I am too tired to care, so enjoy.
Terry O'Leary Feb 2014

Well, GI Jack is welcome back, he left his legs in 'Nam.
He wakes at night in sweat and fright, then drinks another dram.
He doesn't know quite where to go, so seeks his uncle, Sam.


One can't ignore - his ma was poor, and seasons sometimes cruel,
yet Jack was brave and well behaved and surely no one's fool
so joined the ranks that man the tanks, as soon as he left school

He learned to **** our foes at will (ordained a sacred rite)
then packed his bag, unfurled his flag, when sent away to fight.
And yes, the tide was on our side (for, clearly, might makes right)

Through tangled days in jungles' maze, he sought the enemy
behind the trees where, ill at ease, he fought the Yellow sea -
upon the waves of gravelled graves he sailed a killing spree

The ****** dropped and cooked the crops, charred huts along the way
and tanks, with zest, erased the rest, their villages of clay.
(Yes, turret guns are loads of fun with roaring roundelay.)

While on the hunt with other grunts, he burned some babes alive
and wondered why frail things must die, while evil's phantoms thrive -
<When folly ends, he'll make amends if only he'll survive>

With ***** traps (sticks smeared with ****), yes, Charlie fought unfair.
He hid in holes with snakes and voles and snuck up everywhere
and like a mite within the night, caught Jackie unaware

At battle's end, Jack sought his friends - their souls were washed away
and only he and destiny were left in disarray -
with bed and pan, just half a man, the man of yesterday

When Jack awoke beyond the smoke, his frame no longer whole,
he found instead some suture thread neath wraps to hide the hole,
and realized a further prize: a chair on wheels to roll

His head felt light, as well it might, at Victory Day Parade
(across his chest, you've surely guessed, his medals shone, arrayed)
for when he rolled, while others strolled, his boots no longer weighed


Well, Jack stayed home (no roads to Rome) to start his life anew
receiving dole which took its toll as largess went askew
for sure enough, when times got tough, his uncle, Sam, withdrew

To walk the streets with fine elites (or else some *** who begs)
or find a job (or even rob) requires both your legs.
And those who can't, are viewed askant like those we call the dregs.

For getting by he tried to ply and mine his medals' worth -
a wooden cup, a mangy pup, a smirk when miming mirth,
and best of all, at midnight’s call, beneath a bridge, a ‘berth’

He clutched a sign 'A dime to dine?', if anybody cared,
but soon he found, as time unwound, that victors seldom shared.
And Jackie's pride was slowly fried by vacant eyes that stared


He took to drink to break the link with thoughts of what he'd done
and threads of doubt began to flout the yarns Big Brother spun
of freedom's ring and other things, like what it was we'd won

His vague unease arrayed a breeze
with words that chilled the air
and like the fogs above the bogs, they floated through the square
where people sat at tea to chat, and shrieked 'How could he dare?'

Yes, freedom's price is never nice: like storms before the flood
the Daily Rag was on a jag, was looking out for blood,
deemed Jackie's thoughts untamed and fraught, then dragged him through the mud

By hacking clues, they plucked his views like grapes upon the vine.
Big Brother came, blamed Jackie's name for thinking out of line,
shut Jack away from light of day, eclipsing freedom’s shine

The Junto Brass, with eyes of glass, were robed in fine array
to hear the words (though slightly slurred) the witness gasped to say,
while Justice snored (the waterboard awash with Perrier)

Well, Jack was charged with laws enlarged in secret dossiers
within the guise of spreading lies and leading thoughts astray -
The Jury's out... the rabble shout “well someone's gotta pay”

The Judge (who fears the mind’s frontiers) inclined his head to yawn
while making haste through courtroom waste, though slightly pale and wan.
(A voodoo Loon withdraws as soon as Night condemns the Dawn.)


While in his cell, the verdict fell - the sighs of Silence, rife
While in his cell, the verdict fell - the Reaper played a fife
While in his cell, the verdict fell - the price was Jackie's life


Well Jackie's ghost, unlike the most, still mused upon the praise
for misdeeds done in victories won when cruising in a craze,
and once again upon the sin of thinking, nowadays
where, cunningly, humanity’s served lies, and trust betrays.
Then, reconciled, it simply smiled at fortune's wanton ways.


A mind was caught while thinking thoughts neath Sammy’s prying gaze
and forced to stop by concept cops, else join the castaways.
For now it's law to hold in awe the brave new world's malaise
and cerebrate with programmed pate, adorned with thorned bouquets,
then mimic mimes in troubled times - and no one disobeys.
With freedom’s death, truth holds its breath awaiting better days.
SilentAce Nov 2015
I remember the way he looked at me
the smell of hay and fresh cut grass
his hands on the small of my back
the way he tipped his hat at me
the steal my breath kind of smile he wore when he saw me.

I remember being the girl he could never forget
being the girl that confused him most
Spanish, Syrian, and Southern.
"I don't get you"
He never had to.
Because he got me.
There was something about what a homegrown Texan boy could do to my heart that made me want him.

I remember how we first met.
I showed up at the barn to de horn our steers.
black skinny jeans and overly accessorized cowboy boots.
He took one look at me and shook his head.

"**** girl, you're not from around here are ya?"

I had hoped it wouldn't be so obvious
blood rushed to my cheeks.

"Texas born and raised, just not technically all caught up on the 'raised' part."

He smiled, and I think I stopped breathing for a second.
He jumped the stall wall he was behind and landed with such grace that just left me in awe.
I drank in the picture of him in that moment.

He had short blonde hair,
crow's feet from face that smiled a lot in the sun.
Blue eyes that shone like he was up to something
And his smile did something to me I just couldn't ignore.

"Name's Taylor"
He extended an arm out to shake my hand
I remember my pathetically delicate hand in his strong grip

"Hi. I'm Sami, sorry if I look absolutely ridiculous, I'm new to FFA..."
I tried to save myself anymore embarrassment.
"Naw, never woulda guessed it.”
He teased.
I just blushed.
His accent was like honey.

I remember how he always watched me with the animals
watched me trade in my skinny jeans for Miss Me's
and my points for square toes.
And soon I wasn't just the city girl pretending to be country anymore.
I was apart of it.

He told me once that even though I wasn't from a Texas family
country was definitely in me.
From the way my toes tapped to Kip Moore
The way I sang free hearted at the Lee Brice concert that summer.
The way I stole his hat and twirled for him in a dress with boots.
He told me he could see the Texas in me
and I knew he was right because I fell in love with this life.

The life where we rode horses for fun
skinny dipped in the ponds behind the pasture
hauled hay and filled feed trays
listened to 99.5 on the radio blaring singing along like no one could hear us.

He was something sweet, a boy who showed me what I wanted in a man later in life.
If the love didn’t feel like a country song, it wasn’t a love for me.

I will always remember how country became apart of me
and the boy who saw me blossom into it.
CAM Oct 2017
She's really cute.
You talk about her the way I talk about you.
And you know it.
Can you tell that I've guessed?

I haven't decided to ask you much about her yet.
I think I know what you might answer.
Your face lights up when you talk to her.
Which happens all the time, I fear.

I still have yet to decide.
Would I rather see you happy?
Or see you be mine?
And then I remember you're still my friend first.

Yesterday to my friend, I said
You really just liked me as a friend.
I couldn't be more glad
Did you expect me to be overly sad?

You're an amazing person,
So sweet and kind
I really suppose I'm learning
You're the kind of person I need to find.

So I suppose I'm in the friend zone.
But it's not the worst way to go.
At least we're still friends.
And I hope that doesn't end.

In the end my respect for you,
Wins above it all
You're my friend and I appreciate you,
Through everything all and all.
Ah, this felt really good to write.
The moon arose upon the dark night sky,
My lover lay still sleeping next to me,
His insipid skin shone bright, the beauty of he,
I arose; my fangs extended I can’t deny,
I assume you guessed that we cannot die,
As I wait I brew a *** of blood tea,
But the kettle screamed loud as a banshee,
My Dear, looked at me, a gleam in his eye,
He sat beside me, I can tell he thirsts,
“Dark angel” he charmed “lets please our blood ****,”
“Mon Cher” I murmur, “long as you’re with me,”
I bite her arching neck and the blood bursts,
You are the solitary one I trust,
This is survival, not just a **** spree.
vampire poem...
I Can't repair you,
I'm broken too

All i ever wanted
To be the one to speak her name as mine

For hurting you over and over again
It hurts me too

I keep saying it's good for you
but i doubt my honest feelings

That you don't understand me when i say
I love you

For not comming with a warning lable
"dangerous, do not speak with"

For not telling you
And never going to

You could've guessed
I'ts to late now

I'm kinda stuck
But you can't help me out

Do I want to stay or not
Well I don't really know

For lying to you and never stopping
It's a big cycle

I really am
but remember

It's just a game
This one's for you babe
MadnessUnseen Aug 2018
i am really bored
of living
drawing on my board
my death
belief is ****** and
so is faith
by my word i stand
**** the rest
the world is infested
burn the nest
and you guessed it
we are the cause
we are the infestation
with some laws
can not have salvation
it's too late
Ma Cherie Oct 2016
The house is quiet, only my whisper is heard...

oh, I guess I'm such a nerd,
are you hanging on my every word?

OK good, come on, let's go,

Shadows drifting, so discreet,
fowl breath, a cut out sheet,
  hard to move these trembling feet
a waiting guest, for me to greet?
not a trick, I hope a treat!?!

Perhaps the reaper comes this way
he knows of this, a game I play?
waking Crowley, where he lay,

I grab ahold the banister,
and step around the stair valute,
the air grows dark and thick again,
as everything is put in mute,
until a bell, I pause to think,
perhaps a playing flute?

Prolly not & that's real cute,
or maybe
inquiries of  candied loot?

True that,

I wait to hear again, a ding,
the joy of laughter it will bring,
the songs again my heart will sing,

I grip the rail, I'm petrified
a ghostly ghoul,
me, has spied
I move away,
from where I hide,

Shhhhhh be quiet,

My legs are heavy,
I slowly stepped,
you escorted,
up I crept
tears I wish,
that I had wept,
I move my hand,
away are swept,
no way for me to leave, get out,
they'd never hear me scream & shout
trudging on with wary doubt,
I bite my lip,
I moan & pout,
in every step, as I grow brave,
climbing up, a darkened grave,
with every step, my soul to save,

Very dramatic poet,
emmmm thanks, read on,

I reach the top in my suspense,
ahead I say, in my defense,
sorry if you're feeling tense,

It's alright,

I open up the door ahead,
filling me & you with dread,
dragging knuckles, telluric bed,
I look, in horror, shrilling,
a glowing face, chilling,
peeking, must be the one,
that I,
... am seeking!

I chuckle at the sounds of creaking,
bones & boards beneath my feet
they tell,
so sneaking up?
you lived in ****?
so I give up
hey, where's the bell?

Oh hear it is, that's just swell,
I know right?
Thanks for finding it though,

Look out!?!

Jumping out, you give a start,
I feel it pump inside my heart,
looks as if I need black art,


Your not afraid?
you silly girl, let me give
another whirl
a bony hand, sweeps & swirls
tattered sheets they creep & twirl

You do your best
to discourage guests
I'm prepared for any scary test
Yes I'm different from the rest,
& by the way,
you mustn't know that I am blessed
I'm not leaving, you may have guessed

Some pumpkins happy
some are scary
the children here,
they shan't be wary
I am not, no I am nary
this may be a fateful twist
but by the gods I have been kissed
sorry but your aim, it missed

I know that I look a witch
as I move my nose & give a twitch
but my dear, I pulled a switch

I raise my hands, I curse your words
as spirits cry, my voice, is heard
I bind you here, your soul I gird,
I cast a spell, hogtie your feet
take a bite, it's really sweet
yes my dear please have a treat
do you mind, if I have a seat?

I call my spoon, my kettle stirring,
as he speaks,
the words are spurring,
I laugh aloud, as kitty's purring,
supernatural events, occurring,
as caldrons bubble, broomsticks fly,
& Frankenstein went walking by,
his Mummy gives a wistful sigh,

Your look of shock, a priceless one,
like someone just removed the sun,
I dare not say, a silly pun?

No it's very good,
Oh hey thanks friend,

As breaking glass of aged pane's
& your attempts to stop me,
all in vain,

In  rattlin' of my heavy chains
relieving bones,
from what they weigh
as my skeleton comes out to play
protecting children as you prey,
wave a wand, a hand & down I slay,

Too much?

No, go on...

The werewolf howling at the moon
growling baying, softly croons,
a clown I think might be a goon,
the wicked hour coming soon,
cackling witches laugh &  snicker
spirits run & candles flicker
demons plot, giggle...
... snicker,
rubbing hands,
they fight & bicker,


I must admit their kinda spooky
Some are cute and kinda kooky,
To me look like a bunch of groupies,

Ha ha, good one poet!
Oh, well thanks!

I give my stick another flick,
I guess I gotta few more tricks!?
as fires dance in flaming licks,

Ewwww, I like it...

Halloween no time for fools,
the banshee comes with gaurding ghoul,
we're taking him to scaring school

Oh very cool,
yeah I made some room,

You can ride with banshee there,
the one with all the crazy hair,
you'll be alright just don't stare,
It's not as if I just don't care,

Huh!?! Great,

The unwanted speaks,

Well my dear, I'd say we're even
but temporary guess I'm leavin'
and your magic I might believin
pretty good, you think you won
congrats again, it's been real fun
a spell like yours can be undone


Oh I see, you think my best?
wait a sec, I'll get undressed
something here I must confess

Most these monsters are my friends
on whom my back I can depend
do your thing, with time you spend

That's okay, you go ahead
I don't wanna end up dead
and now I see, an empty bed
& your face is just filled with dread
boy you're really turning red
must be all the ink I bled

Careful now,
is this just a story?
filled with rhymes,
& kinda gory,
finding out is mandatory,

Now I jump out,
- I just say BOO
I guess, you see-
the tricks on you!

Happy Halloween!

Great ending,

Awww thanks for the love,
yeah sure do love this time of year,
lotsa fun, this one,

Enjoy a candy,
& thanks for coming!

Cherie Nolan © 2016
Halloween, ooooo...
Spooky fun!?! Does it make any sense!
Oh I love monsters Inc, must be I remembered!
Alexander T Oct 2018
I felt my heartbeat today
I cant remember the last time

when I met you
I knew there was something
but I never could have guessed this much love
could have ever came from what we make

you're making me live
I want to live
all because of you

all because of you
im starting to learn happiness
and it all starts with you
I love her from the very first moment, and now that I have her i love her more and more. And she knows that too.
Ken Pepiton Oct 2018
If you were me,
you would be making the world a better place.

Or thinking about making the world a better place.

Someday, after you learn being me makes you
Really, dead center on the spects, carazy smart
seri-al-owzly simple minded
regarding pre-literal ideas that few, if any

besides you, me now, ever literally take for granted,
for God's sake.
Right, that's some good to be done-

set that blasphemin', God-blamin', goofball free.

If you were me,
you would be hoping nothing you are thinking
is really doing what you are thinking. But it did.

You ever been in an angel bar? I know where some are,
if I were you,
I'd take the dole and hang out widimall day. They are
here to serve. It's in their contract, and they love

leading expeditions into the unknown unknowns, ain't
never been this far before.
Okeh. That did it. Conway Twitty, I could not
have guessed...

Serious poetry, Nietzschean twit. Is laughable.

If you were me,
you would know this is in the cycle. This is whatchamightcall,
the way home, the short version-cut.
The dole, that's grace in action, when nobody else you know has any way to help. Onliest good comes from good done. An old lady told me that, and I thought if you were me..
CallMeVenus Jul 2018
Today I visited our spot for the fist time since you’ve been gone

And as I guessed, this year spring came in suspiciously late and I knew that it was because of you. You stopped time for me. Your last miracle.

But it feels ruined in all its beauty without you here. There is no sky under which I can last without you.

You know how I always liked wearing color and I would swear I’d wear yellow to make you smile?

But after they told me you are no more I knew wearing anything but black would never feel right again.

I whipe my tears as the sun hits my face. I avoid your name only to stop myself from sinking.

I divide my being in three: before, with and after you

Now you exist in places I can’t reach with my hands and I ache while I trip over our memories and open windows.

So when tomorrow starts without you and I’ll have rising sun and tears in my eyes and coffee I will honor you.
Love of my life.
For a time I kept an eye out for the more obscure and exotic
substances, tracking research chemical vendors who had
the most up-to-date wares, drugs that were relatively
unknown, drugs so new they weren't illegal yet.
You couldn't imagine the range of products.
Stimulants, downers, 'noids, 'roids, *** drugs, study drugs, etc.
Not many hallucinogens unfortunately,
But that's a different art. There was
your standard battery of illegal narcotics,
******* knockoffs of more popular drugs,
Drugs designed to evade tests but retain the effects.
Then there was the more experimental stuff. Suffice to say,
This part of the internet is strange and lawless world.
Not like the wild west, more like the backstreets of Seoul.
I spent many a night trawling through the listings
in search of the most recent pharmaceutical innovation,
I sought to keep up with the current affairs of
this rapidly evolving world. A couple of years ago
a certain vendor's listing flagged my attention
and, on an intuition, I acquired a mysterious assortment
of synthetic cannabinoids for far too little.

Thus, I found myself with several improperly labelled compounds.
It took me many months to even partially identify them
and the vendor went dark before the results came in.
However, that intuition was correct:
One compound
was entirely novel.
No mention of it online.
No IUPAC name. No history
of human use.  No prior trace of
its existence. An arrangement of molecules
that had never before seen on the face of this planet.
Imagine that, I found something new. From its structural name
I guessed it had been designed to circumvent whichever analogue act while hopefully retaining enough activity to lend itself to abuse.
These were part of a far more dangerous class of drug
than I would have preferred, and I would
be glad to be rid of them.

There is something very wrong about the circumstances in which
these compounds came to be in my possession. Legal or not, they were part of an unregulated human trial; a consequence of prohibition.

I had submitted them anonymously to a laboratory and stipulated that they make the authorities known if indeed it was novel.
I retained a tiny sample of each identified chemical
for my own experimentation, but sent the unidentified compounds
to the proper authorities in case they too were novel.
As to my own dilemma.
Many a psychonaut
dreams of being the first being to experience
the unknown effects of a novel chemical.
Like Hoffman or Shulgin before them,
It is the highest honor one can think of,
To explore a configuration of consciousness
previously unknown to the human psyché.
However, I declined this once-in-a-lifetime
opportunity. I chose not to retain the superpotent or novel ones.
When I try a novel compound it will be on my own terms, and
the endeavor will be a worthy one. Even more to the point,
Safety first.
I am a little annoyed I had to skip over them, I cannot add them
to my scoreboard, but I did discover a line I'm unwilling to cross.
If I am to try a truly novel compound it will be of my own making;
And I'll certainly not be investigating this avenue
of substance, it's really more of a cul-de-sac.
That class of compounds is the scourge
of many a council estate. In prison they call it
bird killer, on the street they call it spice.
That lone psychonaut learned some terrifying things
about the world; one should tread carefully
and be mindful of what they seek out.

A story from the depths of the darknet.
Terry Collett Nov 2018
Ingrid's mother
was found not guilty
of the ******
of her husband
and released.

Benny heard
from his mother about it
from the local paper.

Ingrid was living
with her sister
miles away.

Benny had only seen her
once since she went away.

Will they move back?
He asked his mother.

Don't suppose they will,
she replied,
probably move elsewhere.

Benny sighed:
he liked Ingrid;
he befriended her
when others wouldn't.

Her old man
had been a bully and abuser,
and Benny wasn't saddened
when someone
cut his throat outside
the public house
and left him there.

At least her mother
was free now;
he hadn't thought
she had done it.

He walked upstairs
to the flat
where they used to live;
it was empty now;
he assumed another family
would move in there.

He looked over balcony
at the Square below:
the milkman
was delivering milk
from his horse-drawn cart;
kids played
on the pram sheds
or played skip-rope
or rode bikes
round the block.

He missed Ingrid;
he guessed she went
to another school;
he wondered who
befriended her now.

He watched the horse
stop and feed
from a nose-bag,
while the milkman
delivered the milk
to doors below.
Benny and his friend 1957
JaxSpade Jan 6
I'm a sucker
For red lips
Curved hips
Red hair
And big ..


You guessed
I'm a sucker
For brunette
High heels
And a tight dress

       You bet

I love blondes
            And wet
Lingerie and ***
The softness of a woman
And the smell of her scent

I'm sucker for it

Female and kiss
Her long nails
And breast
Whispering in my ear
Her soft voice saying..

the sweet, innocent, happy girl
I used to be, only 5 years ago, is long gone.
Thrown away like a pile of garbage
& replaced by a zombie
Fueled by nothing more than fear, anger, sadness, & anxiety.
Not living; just breathing.
If she knew herself today,
She would be terrified of the monster she'd become
While her dreams were crushed right in front of her
& swept away by suicidal fantasies
And abuse of ecstasy
She saw.
She would probably be wiped away
Because she would have never guessed
She would become suicidally depressed
& at the age of 17, addicted to numbness
That eased her emotional pain.
Cutting, burning, drinking,
Taking so many pills she couldn't even think,
While almost by the minute,
Her anxiety and depression only got worse.
But what would surprise her the most
Was how she could even think of ending her own life,
Because she always knew suicide was never the answer.
But I guess after 2 years of constant anxiety,
Depression, hoplessness, & a life that didn't feel worth living,
It begins to feel like the only option.
Most painful of all,
She would hate to see her own death,
When the tiniest thread
Of the rope that once fully held her life together,
Bringing her hope,
Finally broke.
Crying, dizzy from all the pills she took,
She grabbed her blade and slide it across her throat.
Ending all hope for things to get better.
I'm sorry I'm not you anymore.
It shouldn't have ended this way,
But I couldn't live like that forever.
It had to stop
disclaimer: I haven't gone through some of these things, I based them off little things I went through and what others I know went through.
Anyone Nov 2018
That night in the park,
When I drank too much tequila,
We first became friends,
And I started to see her
Around much more.
Unlike others she didn't bore
Me into numbness.
Instead I started to notice
The genuine laugh
And guiltily pleased face
At my carefree jokes
And occasional poke.
She chose to fling around
Yet still enjoy the sound
Of my company
And conversation.
But a question mark formed
And hung like a far-off storm.
We both knew it, our friends guessed it.
But we never did address it.
Limbo is an okay place to be;
Lots to do, more to see.
But the idea of heaven
Overbears like a cloudy dream.
Not seven months later
At Halloween,
We watched a Harry Potter film,
One we'd already seen.
Under the blankets
Our knuckles brushed.
In a sinful rush, the ****
Drew each finger together;
Lacing over eachother;
Thumbs gliding the skin.

Going out on a limb
Was the closest we'd ever been.
But after that, nothing happened,
And soon she moved away.
I'm sure I'm forgotten
In a nonchalant way.
So I still wonder why
We didn't take off and fly,
Or at least never tried.
So here's the lie,
I didn't ever want her.
It's better that it was left like this.
A train you might want
Is much harder to catch
Than to miss.
Nyx Oct 2018
Time passes over quickly
Within the blink of an eye
Seasons are changing
Its summer again, I sigh

It brings back things
That I thought I had forgotten
Bottled up emotions
Forever left unspoken

I see the beauty of the sky
Crystal clear and blue
The yellow Daisy's return
How did it all come so soon?

People fading in and out
Some of them have left
Though thoughts of him
Have my heart beating out of my chest

Anxiety always flushes through me
At every mention of his name
The memories and feelings
Everything remains untamed

We talk briefly of a boy
Who was once here
That stood high on a pedestal
There are many rumours you'll hear

He abused his girlfriend
He used her for her body
He never loved her
He is a heartless *******

I can tell you as a fact
That he loved her more then life
When she broke up with him
It ripped through him like a knife

He played the bad guy to the world
Let the friends he had think he was evil
He doesn't care at all
I learnt that people can be quite lethal

Within me he found sanctuary
A place where his heart could rest
He cried a million tears each day
A side nobody would have guessed

A story that remains a secret
My love for him stays untold
Happiest I've ever been
Even if I was bring controlled

As I walk down the path
Certain area flooded by him
I can't replace his memory
He was my light when all was dim

Occasionally when his name comes up
Many have ask me of the boy
Who was he to you?
Trying not to be coy

Painting on that smile of mine
To which has been perfected over the years
A longing pain erupting within me
Pain I've kept hidden from all my peers

He's an old friend

I would tell them
As I glance over to the tree
Him and I laying in peace
Filling myself with bitter sweet glee

But its better for the both of us
Now we are both free
My precious summer love
Just another devotee

My old friend
and secret love
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