I recently went through a spell
When I had one minor and two major operations
In rather quick succession
One of the consequences of this was
That I didn't see my grandkids for months on end
Primary schools being, as they are
The Petrie dishes for all human disease
So, it was decided that as I was either waiting for
Or recovering from surgery
To keep them away from me
Until I was in the clear
And when I was in the clear
I was soooo glad to see four of them
The youngest of my grandkids
Are twin boys, far from identical
And at this time they were about six
One standing a head taller than the other
And at seperate points in the day
Independant of each other
Each twin said the same thing
"Grampy, I  thought you were allergic to kids."
And to each I gave the same reply
Once I stopped laughing
"Ah well, sometimes it's better than others."
I can see the picture now
"Mummy, why can't we see Grampy?"
Jenny, doing a thousand other things
And no time for explanations
"Grampy's allergic to kids!"

                                              By Phil Roberts

I have forgiven my own attackers

Forgiven the one who cheated on me

Even though she told me to **** myself

That no one would come to love my scars



I battled long against my depression

Won some battles, some I have lost

The years have never been easy

Hatred could easily had swallowed me



I was molded by those now gone

A grandfather I loved with respect

He was not my true one by blood

He was a black African and he was proud



And Grampy, today I am missing you

You taught me who I would come to be

Some would only see you as a black man

My eyes only see you with pride



Abraham Rachid, your soul is always near

I feel you when I am needing you most

I reach out and I touch your spirit

Your soul always helps me to stand tall

Someone called me a wild caveman today
Guess who that little voice was who told me that
My grand baby
What a treasure for gramps.
She is right
Im as wild as two baboons babooning in a room from a cheap
Hotel.
Im wild .

My wife's father
Never gave me acceptability for his
Grown daughter
He came to except me later
When I impregnated
His daughter
Then the father in law
Liked me
Don't understand that one.
So it took my seed
Into a *******
Too make him like me!
And now many grand babies
Entice me
On grandpa's knee's
They say grampy please
Please just give us one dollarino
For one toy from,
San Francisco.
I always give in
To their pocket-thief smiles
They seem to like stealing away
Gramps old farting heart.

I thought of those gone by
How we loved them so
Those tears we had to cry
Wishing we could let them know

Just one last time, to be able to say
"I love you, you have gone away"
"I wish you could stay, you could stay"
"Without you, it is so empty today"

So here I am now, wishing for the rain
Every drop that falls, it is an Angels tear
Up there with God, I know you remain
Watching over me, whenever I fear

I never thought that you would have to die
You were always there for me, always there
If only I had got the chance to say goodbye
It just isn't never fair, it's never really fair

Just one last time so I can say
"Nan, I miss you, if only you could stay"
"Grampy, you showed me strength in your way"
" I love you both, I still miss you every day"

So here I am now, wishing for the rain
Every drop that falls, it is an Angels tear
Up there with God, I know you remain
Watching over me, whenever I fear

Muggy murky dawn clogged with gloom the abbey

Where his grampy sleeps ,

Through

the drizzles fizzle

As native orchids embosoms and blossoms in his lost vault.

like a curfew drawn in the church

The pew lost its crowd

With the paws of time.

Lone man sleep

In deep latin chants they petrify you

Before sheol purifies you

And litany literature lecture limbs you

When in overprotected embankments of battlements

They dry their garbs

Where your lore forayed growth

And sweat smeared smelt breathed wealth

Chagrin dreams washed ashore

lay as upon a cold mornings recollection on a tabloids sold column

which drew your freckles bolder

In a savour of remembrance

For your zealous zealots

Who on an another 'all souls day' reoccur revisiting

the truth of their establishment


in prayers
The good Lord adorn you
Let Lekker dreams cradle you
Your consorts concert never consume you
And earth never haunt you

Tiffany the things unseen you do to me
from the first time my eyes met yours
in your grampy blue van, u had me floored
hazel eyes and a spark of life behind them
to get to know you would be a ten
it seems to me like youre nervous
and a little unsure just like me
can you see?
Im writing this poem about you
cause I dont know what else to do
I was living in a tent
cause it was just me
and I cant afford rent
I thought....
just thought it would be pretty sweet
if we got to know each other
more than just on the street
Hanging out at the cliffs
that was neat
I never jumped from that height before
I was nervous
I kinda did that for you
cause like I said before
You had me floored.

You're wearing too many rings,
just like me.
You're wearing glasses,
just like me. (except mine don't fix my eyes because my eyes are fixed fine)
You're calling me a Little Monster
and I'm laughing, giggling, because monsters don't exist
(except in the closet and in the basement and inside the vacuum)
and you're smiling at me and everything's gold from the fire.
You are wearing an office-shirt, with a collar and a pocket and buttons
tucked into your brown pants
almost like it's seven thirty in the morning, every morning
except it's not. It's Christmas Eve Eve, and I know that because Mama told me
because that's why Grammy and Grampy and Aunts and Uncles and Cousins are being loud in the Living Room
(which is weird because why isn't the kitchen called the Eating Room or our bedrooms called the Sleeping Rooms)
and I know that you're wearing serious-clothes because that's What Grammy Wants to See
and I've been waiting for this day for a whole year. Which is like forever.

I ask for a story and your face wrinkles a little because
I ask for them all the time, I collect them like old people collect money and bank letters and shoes
and you're getting tired of telling them, probably,
but I want the air to shimmer behind your voice
and I want to be the only one that hears it
so I beg.

And you tell me about a magic carpet you had when you were a boy
about fruit--like bananas and apples and kumquats--coming to life
about the time Santa slept late
about when dragons used to be pets and how we used to fly them like cars

and the air is still shimmering but
I'm getting sad
sad,
which I never do when you tell stories
because I'm realizing that all your stories have already happened.
They're ghosts, gone by, never coming back,
beautiful things lost, disappeared.
And you never tell me about the future
because you don't know it any better than I do
and the world seems kind of scary,
too big for me,
ready to **** me in like the vacuum.

You stop your voice, you peek at me
and see my eyes
and then you hug me
all warm because we're by the fire
and the room is silent except for the crackles and snaps
and voices coming from downstairs.

And your shirt is soft and I'm crying
hot water leaks from my eyes, falling down beside my nose
because no one knows the future and it's all too perfect right now.
And you let me go and you kiss my forehead and
say "is it all better now?"
and I nod because I love you
not that I know what love is, but it feels that way
and I'm safe.

My body is like a destroyed DVD,
Scratched up from all the lies and pain brought by two humans I’ve trusted for the last 14 years.

Like a deep scarred disc,
My life stops, (Pause)
sk-k-kips (act like i’m stuttering) over the years I call scenes, I want to forget.

As time ticks by,
more scenes from my life are erased from sharp things like knives and lies.

scene 1: Daddy quits drinking, mommy starts smoking again.

scene 2: We move to Maine to be close to grampy and grammy, they said maybe they can help mommy slow down the amount of gray clouds released from her mouth.

scene 3: Mommy and daddy kiss each other like the people in the movies, its kinda gross

scene 4: We move again cause daddy says his hands make holes in the walls bigger than elephants. and I know that is big.

scene 5: I start Kindergarten, daddy is holding my hand tighter than a gorilla. it sort of hurts but I won’t say anything.

scene 6: I call my teacher mom, maybe cause mrs.roberts has asked me more questions about how my day than the person that used to make supper for us.

scene 7: Mommy starts swallowing these ovally things so she can feel better and not yell at daddy anymore

scene 8: I have to start taking the pills with mommy cause apparently being myself isn’t good enough for her.
[Pause again]
scene 9: mommy is pulling more cigarettes out of the white box than I can even count

scene 9: my daddy wakes me up with bottles that are brown and shaped like the ones on t.v. breaking on the floor cause he isn’t supposed to be drinking that kind of “juice”

scene 10: My mom says she is going away for a while but never says when she’ll be back.

Scene 10: I’m not inhaling the black smoke she blew in my face filled with elements that I discovered called Lies and pain.

Scene 11: Mom comes back like winter, cold hearted and only for a few months

[Pause for audience]

scene 12: Dad locks Mom and I out of the house

scene 12: Mom leaves me at the house so I have to sleep outside

scene 12: Mom is moving 5 states south, the same direction my life is going.

(Slow down)
Scene 15: I get caught finding a way to release all the pain onto my wrists with knives cause my dad is using the same knives to open bottles like a sailor.

Scene 15: I haven’t seen mom in 3 years

Scene 15: I blame myself for dad drinking again

Scene 16: Mom says she loves her boyfriend more than her own 3 children

scene 16: My 12 year old brother is told to **** himself

scene 16: nobody cares

Scene 16: (Slow down) My dad asks why I want to skip over the scenes 13-14
[pause]
“Dad life is to short to reminisce all the bad things.”
Even now I still make scars on the left side of my brain as if I’m going back in time from the Iphone 6 to the 1st Iphone getting thicker and thicker

Scene 16: My dad pays for pills that try to fade the scars on my dvd.

Took the corn from their places
Grampy wiped his dirted face
A towl and a handbag
Sanded desert of CA today
Buggy duning
Or Chevy tuning
Which seems more for me
Pleasurable their both sight's
For sore finger's

He was a crossword puzzle in the local paper
and a raspberry danish with coffee on Sunday mornings &
an extra pinch of salt at dinner
or two.
He was a constant battle of Grampy vs. the squirrels
that raided the the birdfeeder
He was a top drawer candy stash and show tunes playing through the house
And 10 over when hitting those speed bumps
He was the only man I knew that would take his dentures out at DiMillos
& for those of you that don't know DiMillos, it's not the type of restaurant for such things
He was a broken belt on Thanksgiving,
but that wouldn't stop him until his pants were around his ankles
One thing always told me, "I'm gonna fall asleep before my head hits the pillow!" Which always left me in a state of curiosity
I can still hear his voice saying that one line from that one movie..
'You're the guy who overfed my goldfish'
and I'll never forget the way he replied whenever Nana scolded him
'Yes, lovey'
For all of the things my grandfather was, and always will be
He'll be remembered as a neighbor, a father, a husband,
And an amazing grandfather

Grampy
Needs stimulated,
Grammy is irritated.
The old slapper hand is the best tool for releasing
Down and ***** stress.
I think gram's is coming
Think I need best hide it.
Down boy, down!

My age is in a cage
Released I am in dismay
Tired I am of sleeping haze
Tip top over the limit
Maby wake tommorrow
Maby join a senate
Might be president
Who knows
Who will vote
For Grampy.

i picked a pickle
from grampy's pickle jar.
I snippled a bushel of beer at the select town bar*
got into a mess with san diego blues.
After the train passed by
gramps cried
when the coppers held a horn and their sirens
went woopa dee doop.

i picked a pickle
from grampy's pickle jar.
I snipple a bushel of beer at the select town bar*
got into a mess with san diego blues.
After the train passed by
gramps cried
when the coppers held a horn and their sirents
went woop woop.

Red roses stare at me
Loud voices scream from the kitchen
My grandfather is dying
And they're paying cards
I guess he's not quite dying
But the pain meds make him loopy
And the lack of food and liquid
Make is voice scratchy and him
Unbearably thin
I'd be lying if I said it didn't scare me
I'd be a liar if I claimed to not love him
I guess I'm just not ready to lose him
Because I can't stand the thought of losing another loved one

Red roses stare at me
And I'm there with him
Holding him tight
I love you, Grampy
Please don't go yet...
Please don't go yet....
Please don't go.

i picked a pickle
from grampy's pickle jar.
I snippled a bushel of beer at the select town bar*
got into a mess with san diego blues.
After the train passed by
gramps cried
when the coppers held a horn and their sirens
went woop woop.

i picked a pickle
from grampy's pickle jar.
I snippled a bushel of beer at the select town bar*
got into a mess with san diego blues.
After the train passed by
gramps cried
when the coppers held a horn and their sirents
went woop woop.

We say
it is wasted
upon the young, to which
Youth retorts, Grampy, I do not
concur.

You left me in 2015
You were found in your apartment
you funeral was sunny
From then i hated sunny days
I was 13
You left me to cry
You left us all with out a brother, a father, a grandfather
You left me to comfort mom and grandma
You left jamal in his on greif to comfort his mom and sister
You left us with no hand to hold
No smile to hold on to
I sense you around me but you arent truely there
Grampy we all miss you im going to be 17 soon and i need you but your gone