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Sienna Luna May 2016
Focus
your life is in shambles.
Focus
it’s already dismantled.
Focus
your trial awaits.
Focus
not time to delegate.
Focus
on something that breathes.
Focus
on someone that feeds.
Focus
the pressure’s getting to you.
Focus
the lessons’ somehow esque.
Focus
bring firelight to the forest.
Focus
don’t try to score us.
Focus
for your quaint life’s in danger.
Focus
and pay up your wager.
Focus
on nothing at all.
Focus
even though you feel small.
Focus
just know that it’s here.
Focus
you’re twisted in fear.
Focus
your pain is not real.
Focus
those thoughts that you feel.
Focus
are not at all plausible.
Focus
the damage is causable.
Focus
if only you are able.
Focus
to become a bit more stable.
Focus
just focus
at the camera on cue.
Focus
just focus
your petty sum’s due.
focus camera anger stability stress life coxcomb comatose danger fear pain pettythoughts ryhmes sillynonsense
Sienna Luna Feb 2019
Focus
your life is in shambles.
Focus
it’s already dismantled.
Focus
your trial awaits.
Focus
not time to delegate.
Focus
on something that breathes.
Focus
on someone that feeds.
Focus
the pressure’s getting to you.
Focus
the lessons’ somehow esque.
Focus
bring firelight to the forest.
Focus
don’t try to score us.
Focus
for your quaint life’s in danger.
Focus
and pay up your wager.
Focus
on nothing at all.
Focus
even though you feel small.
Focus
just know that it’s here.
Focus
you’re twisted in fear.
Focus
your pain is not real.
Focus
those thoughts that you feel.
Focus
are not at all plausible.
Focus
the damage is causable.
Focus
if only you are able.
Focus
to become a bit more stable.
Focus
just focus
at the camera on cue.
Focus
just focus
your petty sum’s due.
Benji James May 2017
Hey somebody
pass me the eyeliner
Because I want to get Emo
Yep **** it
I'm the drama queen
Always get it wrong it seems
Some say I complain too much
But I don't give zero *****
Sometimes you need a whinge
Yeah just have a little *****
Wise words from the drama king

Focus all eyes  on me,
Attention is what I need
Focus all eyes on me,
I've got something to say
Listen to what
comes out of my mouth
Maybe I'm talking
a lot of **** right now
Focus all eyes on me,
Attention is what I need

Always underachieve
Failing everything I do
Failing them, keep failing you
Can't seem to do
Anything I set my mind too
I'm looking around
For something worth living for
Every time I find something
It escapes my grasp
Always end up back on my ***
Can't seem to get it right
No matter how hard I try
Can't appear to get it right
No matter how hard I fight

Hey somebody, pass me the eyeliner
Because I want to get Emo
Yep **** it
I'm the drama queen
Always get it wrong it seems
Some say I complain too much
But I don't give zero *****
Sometimes you need a whinge
Yeah just have a little *****
Wise words from the drama king

Focus all eyes on me,
Attention is what I need
Focus all eyes on me,
I've got something to say
Listen to what
comes out of my mouth
Maybe I'm talking
a lot of **** right now
Focus all eyes on me,
Attention is what I need

Why does life smack you in the face
When you're circling the drain
The skies have turned to grey
You're miserable every day
Can't seem to catch a break
No matter how many Kit Kats you ate
Is this it, is this my fate
Staying up until late
Just so that I can contemplate
Every **** mistake
I've ever made

Hey somebody, pass me the eyeliner
Because I want to get Emo
Yep **** it
I'm the drama queen
Always get it wrong it seems
Some say I complain too much
But I don't give zero *****
Sometimes you need a whinge
Yeah just have a little *****
Wise words from the drama king

Focus all eyes on me,
Attention is what I need
Focus all eyes on me,
I've got something to say
Listen to what
comes out of my mouth
Maybe I'm talking
a lot of **** right now
Focus all eyes on me,
Attention is what I need

Do you know
What it feels like
To stare at your phone
No messages coming through
Feel like nobody
even cares about you
Yep you wonder what you can do
Is there something wrong with me
Is there are reason people hate me
What is it they need to see
To see I'm worth some time
Every once in a while
Trying to hide this emotion
Behind a smile
All these sarcastic remarks
Covering scars

Hey somebody, pass me the eyeliner
Because I want to get Emo
Yep **** it
I'm the drama queen
Always get it wrong it seems
Some say I complain too much
But I don't give zero *****
Sometimes you need a whinge
Yeah just have a little *****
Wise words from the drama king

Focus all eyes on me,
Attention is what I need
Focus all eyes on me,
I've got something to say
Listen to what
comes out of my mouth
Maybe I'm talking
a lot of **** right now
Focus all eyes on me,
Attention is what I need

Can't seem to make it pay to pay
All this debt is crushing me
And I'm losing my mind every night
To that devil inside
The one that won't let you sleep
He even haunts you in your dreams
There no escaping this reality
And all I can do
Is keep on strolling through
The best that I can
Hope that someone understands
Maybe one day
I'll find happiness again

Hey somebody, pass me the eyeliner
Because I want to get Emo
Yep **** it
I'm the drama queen
Always get it wrong it seems
Some say I complain too much
But I don't give zero *****
Sometimes you need a whinge
Yeah just have a little *****
Wise words from the drama king

Focus all eyes on me,
Attention is what I need
Focus all eyes on me,
I've got something to say
Listen to what
comes out of my mouth
Maybe I'm talking
a lot of **** right now
Focus all eyes on me,
Attention is what I need

I want to get dramatic
Don't tell me not to get dramatic
Don't say I'm complicated
No, I'm not complicated
I'm talking straight
Hey wait, wait
Sister pass me the eyeliner
Because I want to get Emo
You know I want to get Emo

©2017 Written By Benji James
Agnis Lynota Oct 2012
Another day at school, and I am the most pen clicking, pencil pushing, question asking, clueless, self conscious student in my class. Ok, focus….well I try to focus but I never know what the teachers mean when their teaching, and I never know what the priests are preaching, but I do know what I am thinking. And I pray to God that no one else knows the thoughts that linger in my mind. Because there is always a time, but not always a place. And I would do anything to feel the warm embrace of someone who has passed and who loved me. Ok, focus…well I try to focus and I can look at my book all i want but the only thing that goes in is the deep breathe that comes before a sigh. What will all of this school crap mean to me anyhow? Will it help me brush off the struggles on my shoulders, or will it just add more weight to weigh me down. Ok, focus…well I try to focus but instead I sit in class and nod at the teachers to make it seem like I'm paying attention, but what I'm actually doing is trying to shake the troubled thoughts out of my head so that when its my turn to read the passage, I can focus on whats in front of me and not whats behind me. I never knew who to be because I always cared about what everyone would see and if I was better than she or good enough for he and I always wondered when will I be free..When will I be free from the rivers that my tears have formed on my cheek? When will I stop trying to compete and feel complete? When will I get to feel the heat of a love that no one speaks of but everyone desires? When will I get out of this social fire that uses rumors and sadness to make everyone perspire? When will I be free from the mean looks that makes my heartbeat irregular like my temperature when I have fever. but it doesn't matter if I'm sick healthy or dying, because either way I'm gonna keep trying not to care. Ok, focus….how the **** do you expect me to focus when I'm you busy wondering how I look from over there, or if they can  see my despair. Do they know ever time I curse and swear? Do I need to fix my hair? Do they know that their words have the power to strip me bare? When will I get the **** over it and grow a pair? Okay, focus on the real question: where? Where do I go from here? Where do I get happiness? Where will this world lead me to after I'm out of these four walls of high school in less than a year? And every time my teacher calls on me to read I have to ask, where are we? and with a grin she always replies focus, Cali.
One of my spoken word poems
ॐ-i Feb 2015
My focus has been ****** since the day I was born
I was shot out of the womb, flipped upside down on my head,
And had my *** pounded until it was raspberry red

One would think that at that point in my life
My focus might have been on the colostrum
But being ****** to and fro is enough to pull anyones focus
Asunder, from the teet to the ceiling, to the wall, and eventually
Into pieces on the floor

My focus has been ****** since the age of nine
I wanted swing high on the swing set and play kickball with my friends
But my focus was torn by the torments of my ragged looks
The shame of my poor disposition
And the embarrassment of wearing my borrowed bra and donated clothes

My focus has been ****** since the eve of seventeen
When I thought that I was in love with a boy who never seemed to see me
I wanted to brush my fingers through his hair while we feigned awareness in American History
Or lie on his chest as he sang to me strumming on his ukulele
Which made it rather hard focus on geometry
But I was correct in my original assertion that he never ever noticed me

My focus has been ****** since the day I turned twenty-four
And I say that as I am sitting in class writing this story
Property is fun and law school is aight in general
But how could I possibly focus on executory interest
When failing out would ironically fair my nerves so much better?
Wrote this in class. I have officially checked out.
Scotty B Dec 2012
Focus...
Focus...
Focus!
What?
Okay,
What is this?
The walls,
The bloodied white walls.
Are we okay with this?
My feet,
What the HELL is at my feet?
I can't see with all this ******* white light.
This shimmering white light.
Are we okay?
Drip, drop ~ drip, drop
Clocks on the walls?
Focus...
Focus!
What?
Open your eyes,
Quick!
QUIET!
What's that crawling on the walls?
Drip, drop ~ drip, drop
Are these...
Molecules!
Okay.
Okay.
Focus...
Just focus.
I think I'm missing.
Drip, drop ~ drip, drop
Someone should turn down these lights,
Before I lose my minds.
Where did I even find the time?
Focus...
Focus...
Focus!
My hair;
It's gone!
Who took my ******* hair?
Focus on the paranoia,
Focus on the paranoia,
Focus on...
What's in our leg?
I can feel it,
I can grab it,
Got it!
What the **** is that?
Is that...
Water?
Well, how do you do kind sir?
Why, Water, you can talk!
Well, how do you do kind sir?
Why, Water, you can ****!
Well, how do you do kind sir?
Why, Water, you can dance!
Well, how do you do kind sir?
Why, Water, you can prance!
Do you like my clocks on the walls?
Drip, drop ~ drip, drop
How about my filaments in your head?
Drip, drop ~ drip, drop
How about the nightmares we've had?
Drip, drop ~ drip, drop
How about the wettings in bed?
Drip, drop ~ drip, drop
Welcome,
Welcome,
Welcome,
To the Dead!

Drip, drip, drip, drip...
*Drop
Boygene Borice May 2018
Focus is like a walking stick to a blind man,
When he loses the way, it guides him,
Gives him the touch of his path,
As he moves towards his destiny.

Focus is like a shoot of the tree,
It guides the branches in alignment,
When one branch falls off,
The tree still has hope of growing.

With focus, mountains are leveled,
With focus, oceans are crossed,
With focus, clear ways are made,
With focus, destinies are fulfilled.

What if it is only focus that you lost?
That’s why you are messed up,
That’s why you can’t accomplish a task.

If you focus today, you will reach your destiny,
If you focus today, you will battles,
If you focus today, you will conquer enemies,
If you focus today, you will have what you need.

Be focused!
You cant achieve anything if you don't have focus. stay focused
Focus
on the one thing that has more value to you
more than all the other things you want in life  
then just go as hard as you can test the limits
that are set then break them
instead of the sky as the limit
let’s make the limit the heavens
when they say you’re going the wrong way
or you can’t do that cause you won’t make it
look them in their face and say ‘watch me’ as Nas said
the world is yours by that I mean that we have got the world from god
so let’s make the best world focus
on inspiring others to be better than you
show what you did then show them how to do better
let them so you what they know
change their mind from a kid with a dream
to a man with a plan that will change the world
that society will look at as the one and only, the top dog
then they gonna  teach another and reach a ton
focus
on the ones who doesn’t believe that they have anything to live for then change that show why the world needs them
show them what someone has shown you make them achieve all goals the set for there self
plant the seed and watch the flower grow let them see the impossible happen before their eyes to show there is  nothing that you can’t try or accomplish
focus  is when you see or want only one thing
we focus on what we can do to change the world to make it a better place
then you won’t be scared to walk down the block let’s direct our focus on society let’s take it to a better place and time where we can live in peace love and harmony or just see the world through another set of eyes that  are not our own
focus on education it’s a key
how is it a key cause it could show you where the money at
or put you in a higher position in life show what you know
and help change the world for the better
let’s see what the leaders of tomorrow
will focus on so one day
we won’t need to say cash for guns or
stuff like that in a way
we probably miss it when
we finally have peace love and harmony
but until then focus
Jamy Jun 2014
I try to count the ceiling fan blades as they swirl around,
People thought this was cute when I was small,
Especially when I was clocked in the head while counting upon a top bunk,
I'd hear voices behind me sometimes that seemed like a distant echo in a tunnel,
All I could focus on was the whir of the fan.

This interest in fan blades extended to wheels,
As cars would drive by I'd match the rhythm of the engine to the movement of the wheel,
It wasn't cute anymore,
While the voices behind me shifted tones I tried to pull myself away from the passing Toyota out of the window,
ADD was the only word that stuck,

While my therapist would talk I'd focus on her flickering desktop lamp,
Which was uselessly consuming energy to light an already lit desk,
Occasionally she'd say my name a few times and click her pen,
But it wasn't until she'd switch the lamp off leaving me only 7.5 seconds to hear its buzz and see it's dimming flicker,
That I could focus on her words,
And as the phrase 'no improvement' escaped her lips the only things I could think of were synonyms,
I turned one over and over in my mind
Failure.

When we'd walk I'd let his sweaty hand slip into mine,
Ignoring the manual moisture,
Instead I'd focus on his pulse,
Its rhythm kept me at bay,
It suspended me there in time,
Away from fans and wheels and reality
My focus solely on him,
So I'd lie still and listen to his heart beat,
Feeling a smile creep to his face,

I am no longer lost at sea with my focus however I'm not in bay,
I lie in the gulf bouncing between presence and absence,
My therapist who is now the only person that can speak to me and tolerate my pace,
Says I've improved,
But instead of focusing on the synonym Win,
I focus on making my brain push against the strain of the pill.

The voices behind me are now completely gone unless made my main focus,
I can not smile and verbally respond simultaneously,
I no longer have the speed to count my fan blades,
I focus on his heartbeat quicken with anger as he shouts,
I cannot love a zombie.
Annie McLaughlin Apr 2016
Focus
this moment won't last forever
Focus
take it in, not only the better
Focus
on our heavy breaths synchronizing
on the way that our bodies mold perfectly together
Focus
on his eyes, his chest, his lips on my collarbone
Focus
on the tree outside the window
that has been an umbrella to our love
Focus
on the bandaids on my arm
blocking the gory scars from a quick relapse
Focus
on the pleasure
that only he could cause
Focus
this moment won't last forever.
She has a core
A focus, her focus is real
But her focus is gone
Her focus violently said No
Her meaning went off

She hasn't been ripped
She's a vacant impulse
Her focus is dislocated
how wrong
How sad to see her heart!

Her focus won't come back
It hurts, it hurts, it hurts
Love opens doors and closes them behind
Her focus won't let her be
She frantically fights, advices not to love too much
because she did
She puts up with my glory and feeds me still
Because her glory is gone,
When your focus points to a dead end street
I can feel you girl, your tragedy of love
When the meaning is gone,
And you chase the sun desperately
But the sun is not enough
The sun doesn't shine as bright
The sun is dimmed, simply not calling out your name
The sun lacks something, you run away
And everything is pointless today, even the sun rays
Aubrey Nov 2014
I'm not sure how old he is, my step-step-granddad, but that's the advice he gives that fixes itself on my psyche.
Focus.
The act is the goal.
It's the thought of having been and becoming whole.
Focus.
Each event is like a pebble in a landslide.
I take it in stride.
Focus.
I am everywhere and there is no center, no home base, no dock on this river. I'm caught in current. Stay calm. This is perfect.
Each twist in the flow, every rock of the boat, every splash in the face, my being gives chase to  possibilities in consistent inconsistencies, sacred, eternal, geometries. Do our bodies disperse like the leaves that traverse from limb to ground, spiraling down?
Focus.
Where are your shoes? We're running late, and there's no time for another drink. We're out of milk? Look at my sink. It's piled high and I can't think with you  making all that ******* noise. What time is it? I forgot to call... that bill is due tacked on the wall. I wonder if we'll talk again. There's spam where your email should have been. All this time I thought that we were friends. I can't sleep. I'm up too late and I can't sate this need to see what I can make of missed phone calls and mystery texts. That write up? No, I haven't seen that yet. But don't forget, I told you, "I can handle it." Remember? Double. Oh. Seven.
Wait.
Focus.
Breathe in. I'm calm. That's resurrection.
Breathe out. I'm smiling. That's reconnection.
Jowlough Mar 30
The hidden hustlers.

Most of the time, we question the focus of the people we know who are used to having multi faceted things going on with their lives. Stereotypically, most folks have one track sense of judgement on their failures blaming it on the lack of time because of the multiple things those multi faceted people do. There is a known imperative for the common haters, keyboard warriors and ****-hurts of the judging world of current social media to capitalize on the mistakes rather than what has been accomplished, boiling down to, yes, lack of focus.

These people are low-key hustlers. These are people who have massive amounts of real pursuit in terms of things outside their core jobs. People who are the reasons why charities exist, and the same category of people why art forms in this earth continue to be significant. They are usually those folks who are the outliers of the common society, and what a joy to meet and get inspired by these people.

And yes, they are the ones who has people’s eyes sticked in their backs for most part of their lives. The ones who are often exposed to criticisms and judgement, particularly to things like lack of focus during the event of setbacks and misfortunes. When a failure arises, the first one to blame is the lack of focus. I’ve experienced it myself and to the other people, and some, to the closest circle where I personally noticed the struggle in terms of managing their time and their long-lined patience. More than time actual struggle, it’s the stereotyped judgments that hurt them.

But through the years of observation, I found the idea reversed.

Reversed in a sense that I believe that most of the multi-faceted persons have the most solid and ******* focus someone can get from a person. Over the decade of experience in the workplace, those who have side hustles and passion projects are the people who have actual pedigree on lending an extra thousands of miles when tasked to do something. They are the master of balance. They sacrifice their passions hideously depending on human variables such as timing and use of words. They are over-reactive internally and complicated critical thinkers because they won’t allow slightest of any judgement touch and blame the things they are passionate during an event of delays on the tasks they are doing. They know how to sacrifice and be hurt in the process. These are the people who spends sleepless nights just to save their passion projects and keep them afloat in hectic schedules, they are the hustlers in such a way that any loopholes that lead to destroying the things they love can’t be tolerated, so they better put in the hard work hiding in plain sight even if there are no eyes looking, they are masters of making it effortless in the naked eye. But when you dig further on how they do it, you know that they are always in a brink of dying due to misunderstandings and angry loved ones, families and friends because they have been all juggled inside the 24-hour day. Yes they know their shortcomings, but I say, it’s the reverse in terms of  focus.

Some people might relate to this because, I know that these are the people who has thirst to etch something in the world, but is to busy to market and brag it. They have multiple pockets of insane hours and grit on their focal points of pursuits.

Only people with strong focus can be experts in their multi-faceted fields of pursuit. Without massive amount of focus, you won’t be able to build multiple habits. And without the habits, you won’t be experts. Period.

And the funny thing is, often time, people who are judging them on their slightest mistakes are usually reactions from mediocre individuals who are connected with them and sometimes, the victim character who got the lesser attention time from the multi-faceted hustler, thus stirring up pressure because, looking at it, there is a level of dependence, and any delays or setbacks could be  attributed to the ‘so-called’ lack of focus.

These hustlers are people, who are sometimes, difficult to understand. They give vague reasons why they cannot attend a not so important life event. They mastered the art of matured alibis so they won’t hurt feelings. But true enough - they might be insensitive at times.

They get anxiety when they don’t produce something out of their passions. They are curators of their own products. These are the natural creatives, in which, ironically, the stereotype judgment on their mistakes are usually associated with time management issues, lack of focus and improper spending of money on things that majority of people won’t appreciate, or worst, in some eyes, are not important because it doesn’t profit.

I find it ironic when those people who are multi-faceted are more focused than those who are masters of a singular field. We can say that both has focus, but cancelling out the posers, multi-faceted hustlers have the most low-key grit and grind attribute you can find in any human being.
They won’t anyone touch their joys with one-dimension judgement. But they are not showy and everything seemed to be effortless.

So what I'm telling you is somehow the argument is in reverse. They tend to be targeted because of their vague presence, in which results speak for itself. they are working in the shadows - They are the people who inspires, who are strong, and the ones who deserve any small amount of appreciation. They are the people I call the hidden hustlers.
Stay focus, keep your eyes on the Creator.
Stay  focus, keep relying on his strength here.
Stay Focus, and keep trusting in your Creator.
For I as well as many others are praying for you.
Focus on him, the true Creator of Life and death.
Never give up on him, for he never gives up on you.
Just stay Focus, keep relying on him for he is Good.
Keep Focus, and keep praying to him in everything.
For he shall never ever let you down so stay Focus.
Potential

I was told I had potential
That I could do great things
But nothing has transpired
Into the glory that it brings
And so the bar gets lowered
As far as it can go
Until, it can get no lower
No room for me to grow
Perspective is welcomed greatly
Opinions come and go

Focus is illusive
As well the ebb and flow
Focus is illusive
As well the ebb and flow

I've been stagnant without direction
As the years pass and I grow old
The consensus is its never too late
Or at least that's what I've been told
It's far, so far beyond my vision
Down that long and winding road
I once thought I held it in my grasp
But it slipped right through the fold

Focus is illusive
As well the ebb and flow
Focus is illusive
As well the ebb and flow

Greatness isn't given
Or earned through years alone
It's what we say and how we say it
It's with our words and tone
It's possible you've reached your peak
Up the mountain through the snow
It's still no cause to lower the curtain  
After each and every show

Focus is illusive
As well the ebb and flow
Nothing is more conducive
Than letting shine your inner glow

If there's a chance then you should take it
Show us all how much you've grown
From the prince who lost his kingdom
To a crowned king on his throne
Not everyone can make it
The choice is yours and yours alone
Just don't become complacent
When the world is yours to own

Focus is illusive
As well the ebb and flow
Nothing changes without change
When you still have room to grow
This started as a writing prompt many months ago. Directly due to positive feedback, it was made into this poem and ultimately, into a song.
Sam Arin Sep 2019
Focus.

Just try to
Focus.
I’m hearing,
but not listening

Focus.

Why cant I
Focus?
maybe because
Im writing this poem
or maybe…

Focus.

Youre not even trying to
focus
im not hearing anymore
im sure not listening

focus…

i cant
my mind is too
gone...
Part one of two poems written in class one day both expressing very different emotions and reactions to the same situation
jeffrey conyers Apr 2015
If ever depressed.
Make God your focus.
Open up and confess with honesty and truth.

Even if happy.
Make God your focus.
Give him the credit for your upliftness.
For him , we should serve a true purpose.

When pushed to your limits.
Make God your focus.
Every trying time you face in your life.
If you make God your focus.
You find he make things work.

He doesn't let us down.
Not in the least.
If you think about it.
We more likely let him down.
Cause we fail to make God our focus.

Sure not all of us.
Then this poem isn't addressed to you.
Cause we make God of focus.
Jonny Angel Dec 2013
Gently rock,
soothe me,
focus,
focus on us,
feel the flow
of me
inside
of you,
high in Heaven.
Josh Hall Mar 2014
My dreams,
They slip me into sentimental abhorrence,
Distractions are piercing my silence,
The insects are buzzing,
They drive me away,
I notice the new shade of gray,
It consumes my life,
It consumes my whole life!
So I ***** and strife!
Watch my world break its back,
Refracted distractions shine through the cracks,
My focus blurs to black,
Focus!
For ****'s sake let me focus,
My mind slips to hell,
It will **** us all,
So leave me alone,
Grow up,
Be thrown,
Expect me to die,
Waiting for things to get done,
I don't like to lie,
Let me know when we've won!
Please save some focus,
It's all I want to do,
Leave me to focus,
And I'll try not to leave and say "*******."
I've decided I'm going to put songs in the notes of my poems, because I can.
"thholyghst"-Crosses
You have to stay focus on God, when you don't know what to do.  Just believe  he will give you strength, to make it safely through.
There will come a time in life, when all is going well.  Then all of a sudden, you feel that you have failed.
You have to stay focus on God, so you can keep a clear and sound mind.  God will be the one to help, and he will be there on time.
You have to stay focus on God, so he can heal your pain.  Don't call on anyone else, other than" Jesus " name.
You have to stay focus on God, so he can lift your load.  He will give you strength to be around, until you are old.
Stay Focus On God!
By, Sandra Juanita Nailing
Alyssa Underwood Sep 2017
There is little in this world that consistently causes our hearts more pain or which produces in us more need for forgiveness than rejection, especially from those whom it has cost us so much to love. It is universal anathema to the soul, and much of our lives can be unconsciously governed by the fear of it. So we find ourselves naturally asking, "Joy in the midst of rejection? Is that even possible?" Oh, yes! Not only possible but commanded of us who are believers in Christ. And not only commanded of us but ready to be gloriously bestowed on us like the most precious of pearls.

It's in the season of greatest rejection that we enter the season of greatest opportunity to discover the fullness of God's joy by discovering the fullness of His own heart. Walking in intimacy with Jesus through this searing pain may be one of the most priceless privileges of grace granted to us on this earth, for it opens up one of the widest doors for us to enter into the fellowship of sharing in His sufferings, and there is no more obvious chance to die to ourselves and live for Christ than in that holy communion of suffering with Him.

It's there that we're most able to clearly see Him and best prepared to clearly reflect Him, and it's then that we're empowered to live our lives here on earth from the very throne room of heaven, seated in the resurrected presence of our Bridegroom, where the joy always runs full and over. So our deepest heartaches will turn to deepest joys when we embrace them for the sake of Christ, to gain Him and be found in Him, to know Him in intimate detail through excruciatingly sweet experience. We will discover that the Lord entrusts the most luscious of blessings and the rarest of secrets to the most desperate and thirsty of souls, and that He delights to place the loveliest of wings on the lowliest of worms.

The gifts of myrrh's sorrow which the Father pours into the vessels of our lives are poured first into the hands of His own Son and flow through His nail-pierced scars before they ever touch us. And as we choose to graciously receive them as such, we are filled up with Him and enabled to pour Him out into the lives of others, even those who continually scorn and despise us.

The gift (yes, gift) of rejection is the high privilege of being asked by our Commander to become His flag bearer, receiving the esteemed honor of marching beside Him at the center of the front line, into the heat of the battle and into the face of the "enemy" (the rejecter), armed with no gun and carrying only His banner of love over our head for all to see. It's a sacred invitation into a certain death for the sake of knowing His love more intimately and for the service of displaying it more gloriously.

And if tempted to refuse the privilege, let us remember these two things: this life is so much more freely, joyfully lived when we have finally learned to count ourselves dead to it and alive to Christ, and the flow of His agape love through us will only be as strong as what it costs us to demonstrate it. The greater the cost, the purer the love; the purer the love, the more we are made like Him; the more we are made like Him, the more attuned we will be to His own heart's breaking and to our own breaking of it.

Oh, that we might be purged of ever thinking again that our neglecting of His love does not matter to Him! May He cause our hearts to break and break until we see how much it does! May we know the world's rejection again and again until we are finally scoured clean of our own despicable tendency to reject Him in favor of all our worldly playthings! No lover has ever endured more rejection than our Lover at our own hands and by our own hearts. And no lover continues to love through rejection with the determination and desire, suffering and sacrifice, tenderness and tenacity of our own Bridegroom. Can we not endure whatever He has called us to suffer for Him? Can we not allow it to drive us more fervently to His heart?... Lord, capture us by Your mighty hand and consume us by Your mighty flame, and may we pant and pine only for You, for Your love sets us free to dance in the midst of the fire!

How humbling, mystifying and worship-evoking it is to realize that the One we have so grievously rejected is the same One Who so perfectly understands and longs to comfort our own heart's grief when we are rejected. And to not run to Him now for that fellowship of healing would be to reject Him all over again and to break His heart once more. What could hurt Him more than our stubborn resistance to share in both His sufferings and His comfort when there is so much joy and intimacy waiting to be had with Him? Whatever ache our own heart knows, however deep and scathing, it cannot compare to the ache of His own heart when we let anything pull us away from Him, for He is rightly EVERYTHING to us—Father, Husband, Lover, Best Friend, Brother, Confidante, Kindred Spirit, Counselor, Nurturer, Rescuer, Healer, Hero... Behind the pain of every rejection is a legitimate need or desire that He is waiting to fill in us, and we have to let Him get to it by dying to our fleshly ones.

Or do we suppose that we might ever find true and lasting joy apart from dying to ourselves and abiding in Him when He died so that we might fully live in the joy of that abiding? No, true joy will only follow abiding; abiding and dying walk hand in hand, and rejection throws open the door for all three. Man's rejection is central to God's wooing, for it shatters our false expectations of human love and stirs in our hearts the longing for a perfect one. So let us not shrink back fearfully from that which can do us such good and teach us to love as Christ has loved us. With renewed passion, let us ask Him to wrap every affection of our hearts more tightly around Him that every desire might be united with His own and that we might learn to love in a way that sets our lives and the world around us ablaze!

To be despised and rejected and, still, to love—that is the ultimate triumph of Christ in our hearts, for we are never more like Him, never more full of Him, never more surrendered to His heart and His work than when He pours out His love through us to those who will not love us back. When we can stand in the face of bitter, cutting words, contemptuous looks and shaming mockery and still love fiercely but with a gentle and quiet spirit, we will know without doubt that it is His Spirit moving gloriously through us... Lord Jesus, Who so willingly floods our hearts with Your most precious gift, Yourself (and You are Love!), teach us to ever know You more and to rely fully on the love You have for us and ARE for us in infinite supply. Teach us to feast on the abundance of that love, and let it flow freely out of us to the ones who would reject, scorn, mock and hate us, so that they too might one day taste and be consumed by Your perfect love which drives out all fear—Your infinite, immeasurable love which heals all wounds and fills all emptiness and gives meaning to all of our pain. You alone, O LORD, are able to truly and purely love through rejection, but You live gloriously in us, so unleash Your mighty waters through us. Your love is everything, for You are Everything!...

Our all-sufficient Bridegroom is able to work His agape love most perfectly in us when that love poured out to another is not ever reciprocated, for it forces us to finally let Him fill us with Himself alone and to rely completely on His love instead of on the love of another to meet our heart's deepest hunger. The need for His filling IS our deepest hunger, and so our soul comes most alive not when it is loved by our fellow man but when it receives and pours out Jesus' love to our fellow man, expecting nothing in return but more of Him. Thus His love is made complete in us whether they ever love us back or not, and the fear of their rejection is eventually driven out by His perfect and perfecting love.

Even if love is never returned...never even received...it is never in vain, for "love never fails." To love someone, though we mean nothing to them, may seem too cruel a burden for the heart to bear, but the only thing worse than not being loved is to not love, and so the greatest tragedy of love spurned or lost would be to stop loving. For to cease loving that which causes us pain would be to let the pain win, but for as long as we love, really love with Christ's own heart, no matter what else happens, we win.

Love without pain remains unproven and, therefore, is meaningless, but love through pain invokes nothing less than the miraculous and inspires even the incredulous. The purer one's love, the more pain it causes when it is rejected, but only continued love can redeem the pain of loving, and only a perfect Love can heal love's scalding wound; the more scalding the wound, the better primed it is to receive that perfect Love fully into it.

There is great romance to be found in unrequited love that keeps loving, though it is beyond any human emotion or fleshly capacity or mortal understanding. It is a most sacred mystery which cannot be grasped with the head or even the heart but only with the spirit, for it is a love whose connection to Christ remains unsevered. There is perhaps no intimacy to compare to it, for it drives us to Him like nothing else will. It is a love whose longing for the other gives us the greatest insight into God's own aching longing for us. Only when it has cost us everything to keep loving do we begin to understand the smallest fraction of the wildly extravagant love Christ has for us or of the brutally scandalous pain which it has cost Him, and it will leave us in utter awe of Him and in love with Him like we have never been before.

As our focus is turned more and more toward His love for us and toward all of our previous rejecting of it, we will come to clearly see that agape love and rejection have everything to do with the the hearts of the lover and the rejecter and nothing to do with what the beloved and the rejected have done or deserve. For obviously we have done nothing to deserve God's love and He has nothing to deserve our rejection, yet He never stops loving us and we keep rejecting Him in ways we can't even comprehend. No one has ever known more rejection than the only One Who is completely worthy of love. Every time we sin we reject Him in favor of something else, but still He loves us without fail and without end. He loves us because He is love and because He has chosen to set His love on us. We are absolutely and irrevocably loved and accepted in Christ Jesus, and nothing and no one can ever change or mar that love. Our identity is completely secure in Him simply because of Who He is and who He says we are to Him.

Therefore no amount nor depth of rejection by anyone changes anything about who we are in Christ or our worth to Him. We do not need any man's love or acceptance to validate our worth, for it has already been established in the heavenly realms by the only One Whose verdict carries any real and lasting weight. We are significant and precious and holy to God regardless of what anyone else thinks of us or says of us or does to us. What has their rejection got to do with us? Nothing, for we are His! We are chosen and we are beloved! And so we are freed from the fear of rejection when we see that it cannot define us or taint us in the sight of the only One Whose opinion or judgment matters. It's a glorious thing to finally care what no man thinks of us, only the Master, for then we begin to be free to love all men as He loves them and to pray with deepest sincerity, humility and fervor even for those who spitefully reject us.

And even for that one who has hurt us most deeply, who has crushed our heart and thrown us to the wind like chaff without so much as a glance back, we will pray, no longer with only a slight and distant hope that he would return to us but now with a passionate desire to see the prodigal return to the heart of the Father. We will pray, not with a focus on life with him but with a focus on life for him. We will pray for a total and glorious restoration of his life to Christ, even if we will never be there beside him to share in the fellowship and joy of his homecoming, even if we will never get to experience up close in this life the thrill of seeing the Lord make something beautiful yet of his ashes. And this may be the hardest and truest test of our love for him—this painful sacrifice of desiring his absolute best apart from us. It is a wrenching blow to our pride and to our will (not to mention our codependence), for we had so longed to play the Muse and to awaken that beauty in him. So we know we could never yearn or pray for this out of our own strength or wisdom; it is simply too painful to our flesh. We must be led into it and through every delicate step of it by our loving Redeemer, our Bridegroom, as if He were leading us out under a canopy of the starry host and into the most intricate and intimate of moonlit dances. And so we begin to pray and to dance...

But even wrapped in Jesus' arms we are clumsy, stumbling miserably over our own feet. The music is perplexingly unfamiliar and the steps wildly unpredictable, and our toes feel terribly pinched in these new shoes. Maybe this dance is just too hard for us. Maybe we are not yet ready. Maybe we should sit it out for now and try again later when our shoes are a little more broken in or when our heart is a little less broken apart. So we pull away...

But He tenderly beckons us back: Dear and beloved bride, broken-but-beautiful one whom I have made My own, do not push Me away now, not after I have brought you so far. I have many more secrets to share with you and so much more to show you of Myself. But you are not letting Me lead this dance, beloved. Why are you so rigid in My embrace? Why so worried over the next steps? Let go of everything and abandon yourself to My love. Enjoy Me...Follow Me...Lean into Me...Keep watching My face...Let Me move you however I desire us to go...Trust Me...Love Me. Shall we dance, then?

Yes, we shall and we do! As He draws us into Himself, into the prayer of His heart and the dance of His Spirit, and as we give ourself over completely to the impulse of His leading, the details of our words and the precision of our steps give way to the desire and passion of His will, and the pulsating of our heart swirls to the rhythm of His own. The further He pulls us into union with Himself, the more we find ourselves desiring this same intimacy-with-Him for the very one who has so badly hurt us, for we see how badly he himself is hurting without it. We realize now that his running away from us and toward another is just as much a reflection of his insatiable yet misunderstood craving for God as was all of our running toward our own idols (including him). Our soul aches for his redemption and his healing and for his lost sheep's heart to be brought out of darkness and into the marvelous light that shines from Jesus' face, that he might truly know the pleasure of knowing the One Whose pleasure he was created for.

Somehow, through this heightened and mysterious intimacy of prayer for him, we are now discovering a strange and new kind of intimacy with this very one whose intimacy had so often given us the slip, this one whom we had so long loved and lived with but failed to uncover at all, and the fresh wind of it drives us even deeper into the ache of God's own heart for him and for us. It is at the center of that ache that we are finally able to let go of the hurt and the man and leave the matter entirely in God's hands, understanding that the Shepherd's aching heart knows fully all whom He has chosen and will never stop dealing with or seeking after any of His own sheep. And so...


                        We release to Him with a heart of trust
                        This one whom we love and always must
                        We can let go the man and rest because
                        It's out of our hands and always was



But the dance, like the feast, goes on and on, and the more we dance and the more we feast, the more we heal. Our Bridegroom wounds us by His own providence but washes our wounds with His faithfulness and binds them up with His love. The wounds and their healing make us beautiful to Him. They teach us to know Him, to hunger for Him, to enjoy Him and to please Him. And they get us perfectly ready for that most glorious of dances and that most joyous of feasts which are still to come but, perhaps, much closer than we might dare to imagine. It is time to awaken, dear bride of Christ, and to break in our dancing shoes!
~~~


"And so we know and rely on the love God has for us. God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in him. This is how love is made complete among us so that we will have confidence on the day of judgment: In this world we are like Jesus. There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love. We love because He first loved us."
~ 1 John 4:16-19

"And we boast in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us."
~ Romans 5:2b-5

"As you come to Him, the living Stone—rejected by humans but chosen by God and precious to Him— you also, like living stones, are being built into a spiritual house to be a holy priesthood, offering spiritual sacrifices acceptable to God through Jesus Christ."
~ 1 Peter 2:4-5

"He was despised and rejected by mankind,
    a man of suffering, and familiar with pain.
Like one from whom people hide their faces
    He was despised, and we held Him in low esteem.
Surely He took up our pain
    and bore our suffering,
yet we considered him punished by God,
    stricken by Him, and afflicted.
But He was pierced for our transgressions,
    He was crushed for our iniquities;
the punishment that brought us peace was on Him,
    and by His wounds we are healed."
~ Isaiah 53:3-5

"But whatever were gains to me I now consider loss for the sake of Christ. What is more, I consider everything a loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things... I want to know Christ—yes, to know the power of His resurrection and the fellowship of sharing in His sufferings, becoming like Him in His death..."
~ Philippians 3:7-8a,10

"But He said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect in weakness.' Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong."
~ 2 Corinthians 12:9-10

"For just as we share abundantly in the sufferings of Christ, so also our comfort abounds through Christ."
~ 2 Corinthians 1:5

"'Blessed are you who hunger now,
    for you will be satisfied.
Blessed are you who weep now,
    for you will laugh.
Blessed are you when people hate you,
    when they exclude you and insult you
    and reject your name as evil,
        because of the Son of Man.
Rejoice in that day and leap for joy, because great is your reward in heaven. For that is how their ancestors treated the prophets...But to you who are listening I say: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you...Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful.'"
~ Luke 6:21-23,27-28,36

"Make sure that nobody pays back wrong for wrong, but always strive to do what is good for each other and for everyone else. Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus."
~ 1 Thessalonians 5:15-18

"You make known to me the path of life;
    You will fill me with joy in Your presence,
    with eternal pleasures at Your right hand."
~ Psalm 16:11

"I pray that out of His glorious riches He may strengthen you with power through His Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God. Now to Him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to His power that is at work within us, to Him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen."
~ Ephesians 3:16-21

~~~
Michelle M Diaz May 2014
its cold here
my heavy eyes droop
the teacher drones on
I blow my nose, so that I can breathe
in, out, in sneeze out in, out, in, out, sneeze
I'm at the back of the room
isolated
java 2, the elite
sitting alone in a java 1 class, so I don't have to pay attention
Mrs. is teaching stuff I already learned
She hands me packets to work on, on my own
the trees look so green, I love the spring
may, almost, summer
summer coming soon, not soon enough
tap tap tap tap the keyboards click click click
ugh my nose is so congested
my eyes are so heavy
sleeeeeep I just need sleep
I have to packets I need to work on, but I can't focus.
can't focus, can't breathe
my hands are tired from typing
I'm too tired to focus on reading
so what to do, what to do.
I'm wasting time, but who actually cares
I'll get the work done, just not today
summer come sooner, I need some warmth
warmth, my bed is so warm
this classroom is cold
i'm cold
bed, bed, sleep warmth
how will I ever get through this day?
Focus
(A Friends Challenge)

Focus on the good things
That happen every day
Don't just see the bad things
And think that it's okay

Talk about a life well lived
The compassion someone showed
A moment of forgiveness
That touched someone you know

There are people all around us
Who lend a helping hand
That will give the shirt off their back
To help their fellow man

So many who are out there
That answer to the call
Each day they do amazing things
Wanting no reward at all

So focus on the good things
That happen every day
See all the things around you
That make this world a better place

Focus


Carl Joseph Roberts
A friend's challenge to bring attention to the fact that all we hear about is the negative on the news each day. He said there are so many good things but you never hear of them.  Wanted me to write a poem reminding people that there is still a lot of good out there and it is not all gloom and doom. Look around daily and focus on the possitive instead of just hearing and seeing all the negative.
Electromagnetic Motion Ocean Of Pure Focal Emo-tion.
The Very Sound Of The Creators Verse And Rhythm In Loving Notion Pouring Through The Crystalline Endocrine Indoctrinated Shock Ra Of Shocking Unblocking Colorful Tones In Unmolested Focus And Definition.

To Flow Your Emo-tions Through Your Core And Manifest In Your Intended Notion All Without The Misidentified Horror Of The Wrongfully And Negatively Defined Emotions, One Finds That The Mere Act Of William Tell And That Apple Upon The Head Must Have Been One Hell Of An Interesting Interaction, Yet Instead Of The Reassuring Smiles And Calm Demeanor Of The Archer As They Lock Eyes, What Pray Tell You Think The Eyes Of The Archer Looked Like On That Very Frozen In Time Moment As He Released The Arrow To Guided Love Of Perfected Intent And Delivery Of Safe And Demanding Fortitude Of Action To Defeat All Possible Variable , As If To Need To Bend The Very Laws Of Nature If They Were To Cause An Number Of Odd And Unpredictable Events To Derail The Intent Of The Man Shooting The Apple Off The Head Of His Dear Child's Head, For Not A Bird May Pass Between, Not A Gust Of Wind Be Seen, Not An Earthquake Be Fabled To Accrue, Not A Single Action But The Undeterred Focus Of Absolute Might In Will, His Fee Will In Flight. What Might His Eyes Be Relaying In That Frozen Moment? Reassurance, Pity, Fear, Confidence, Or The Electric Fire Of Electromagnetic Motion Ocean Of Pure Focal Emo-tion To Get The **** Thing Done And Without Foolish ******* Reactions To The Real And True Focus Of Emotion, And Pray Tell, What If The Child Mistook This Look In A Moments Notice And Flinched Out Of Concern That The Father Was Angry With Him? Or Is It Best To Realize The Real Importance Of This Story As It Is The Trust In The Definitions Of Intended Focus And Not Of Simple Trust.? ,... Yes, Intended Focus Of Emotions Being Trusted As True And Not Negative In Nature, Dear Friend, Yes. So Let Your Soul Be Your Pilot, Let The Flow Of Emotion Be Free And Not Dictated By The Restraints Of Control And Be Seen And Used In Negative Ways, For These Are The Crimes Against All Mankind And The Bigger Part Of Why Spoken Word Is The Very Spell That Binds The Psyche, For The Focus Of Or The Lack Of Focus Of Emotions True Meaning And Purpose Is The Crime Against All Life Indeed. Live Free And Pilot This Love Ship Successfully By No Longer Defining Self By The Ways And Means That Have Caused Us To Fear Our Own Power To Move Mountains, And Kept Us All Mustard Seeds When We Are Truly  Far More Than You Can Believe. Feel Free, Yes, By All Means Feel Free.
Let your soul be your pilot - Sting - Lyrics
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tst34mtiz1Y
Pyrrha Jul 2018
I find it strange that when I look into your eyes I'm not met with an endless starry sky. The world around me doesn't freeze or turn monochrome around everyone but you. I don't see an endless sea or visions of a setting sun, no matter my determination. So how do I know it is love if it isn't as the words I've heard all my life describe?

Yet my heart still drops when you walk into the room, even when your focus is a place far off. People say it's like a flutter but this is far too heavy to use such a light word to describe such a feeling. It's painful, but I know it isn't something ominous or bad because it feels right. How do I know it is love if none if my words describe it right as they should?

I get it every time our eyes meet or you tilt your head and smile with your head in the clouds. I get it when you laugh to yourself or say something hardly above a whisper. When you focus so hard you ***** up and let out that silly sigh of aggravation and I feel such deep affection. Yet is it alright for me to say what I feel is love when I can't even tell myself what love is?

I don't think your eyes need starry skies or my stomach needs a million butterflies. Your smile doesn't need to illuminate the room and my thoughts for you don't need an anchor. Your love shouldn't have an expectation and my words don't need to have a proper diction.

Perhaps I'll see it in your heart or feel it in your touch one day if you feel the same regardless of what the world has sold me with their modern day poetry. I promise you that no matter how hopeless I become I will find out for myself  what it means to love you wholly, even if I have to find out from loving at a distance.
I don't understand why I write so many poems about love when I am not even in love. It is so frustrating to have words without a muse and a muse without words.
Jul 2018
for a moment i lost focus.

i lost focus.
began to forget
parts of myself
that made me
me.

i lost focus on myself.
only to direct it to the
temporary world that
we live in.

for a long time
i lost focus of my mind.

only to focus on the
blur and haziness
that is my life.
-feeling out of touch is one of the worst things yet.
Alexa Oliveira Jan 2014
This week focus are daily tasks....
Exercising
Eating 3 healthy meals
Prayer 3 times a day
Reiki for at least 20 mins
Sending out 5-10 resumes
Meditating for at least 10 mins
reading, writing, and listening to positive messages...

The focus is in the lotus...

And i can do anything...

I can not only get through this week.

But i will get a new job by next week.

I will be cool, calm and collected everyday, and by Friday night be at peace with myself..
Look back at January and laugh...  
Laugh because i know that im stronger now than i ever was...
God gives his toughest battles to his strongest warriors...

Afer losing mommy , i got straight A's. i played sports, i ran everyday, now that i think about it, i took very good care of myself.. i spent my week focusing on me, i would hang out with friends from time to time...

but i really did just focus on me, and what i wanted...

I remember it being tough... i remember thinking i would never feel better, i also remember having some days where i would just lay in bed...

i guess i was much more gentler at 16 then i was being weeks ago at 21....

5 years.. wow...

Seems like forever since then.

SO much has changed on many levels. Especially spiritual.

But i got through it...

Just like im getting through this...

When you relax the mind and the body, you then can focus...

I was so tense all the time.

Its nice to feel free for once...

Go with god.. He always fulfills our needs...
Before ...
As you grew
my focus was
on your beauty
and love
As I grew
your focus was
on my duty
and devotion

After .....
As you grew
my focus is
on your growing
beauty of love
As I grew
your focus is
on the strength
of my love
IndiGo Mar 2015
I wish God could send my dreams thru the mail
I wonder if he likes to see me fail
I wonder if i'll ever reach them at this point
It seems like everything is turning switching & flipping
I wonder if my dreams are too big for me
Or is that just the voice of misery & frustration creeping up behind me ?
What is there to do?
What is there to say?
If i pray for my dreams right now will they come in the mail today ?
These questions toss & turn in my mind daily
Trying hard not to let the voices lead me astray
Focus on my focus is what i say
Dreams upon dreams i see
Focus on your focus they said
Dreams upon dreams i saw
Tears upon tears i cry
Failure upon failure i felt
Dreams i saw
blurred out, i see no more
Tears  fell, they saw
Dry your eyes they said
To write, is what i did
Are my dreams too much for me?
They arent here, as far as the eyes can see
When I go to sleep I see my dreams face to face in front of me
My older self she said, youre dreams are so big the most you can do is imagine, not physically see.
I took in what my older self said , then i said my one of a kind self just told myself my dreams so big only i can reach them myself.
Focus on my focus i say
Dry those eyes i say
Greatness i see
when i look at me
Amelia Jo Anne Sep 2013
let myself just stop halt, just for a second. let myself be myself, surrounded in music & by people I don't know..and some of them that I Do. stop for a moment & let myself just focus on their hands, their lips on me, working mine in the rhythms, those slutty club hypnotics crafted by sound manipulators. wait, Focus. Their soft, demanding lips on mine. not the ones I want but hey. Focus. Those slender fingers reaching up the nape of my neck- my arms give me away with natural goosebumps, my skin hacking up, reflexively, not aggressively, but with fondness & heated chills. those fingers, nails trailing my scalp...****, I wish he could do this - wait. Focus. her lips still demanding mine, but liquor likes to press the 'play' button when you're not looking, leaving you to stop. look at the mess you've made. children have a funny way of breaking all their favorite toys. stumble to the bathroom you half hoped you'd be tasting danger in about an hour ago. can't even be angry enough to flip off the other girl at the sink, too ashamed to look at yourself. the pressures of hating yourself some days unbearable because you get claustrophobic when the door closes with only you & your Savior inside.
Ivette Nov 2018
Sometimes I wonder if this is actually going to happen but when I drift of to space it is just...YOU!

No it is never going to happen! Me focusing on something for once. Writing, reading, listening, eating, learning, sleeping, talking NOTHING.

I won't be able to do it therefore it is never going to happen because in the middle of me doing something it is always you that is in my mind!

Why out of all the years I had to meet you was in the most important year of my high school life.

I can't focus on anything because once I close my eyes, it's you. It is always you. When I talk to you though it is different..I can focus on what I am doing with you right next to me.

Is it because I am finally awake? That I am not dreaming anymore because the dreams are coming into a reality when you are in the same setting with me?

Even while writing this it is you in my mind. I can never do anything right when you are not around it's like you are a drug and I just need it every time until I just pass out!

But when you are here and when I am out of space in reality, I focus. But I am sad..knowing you have a girlfriend. With you knowing how I feel towards you and you don't do anything about it. Not even a single "Oh well I'm sorry but I'm taken" all I got was "Oh okay"

You are just going to ignore my confession? Well I guess I am never going to be able to focus.
I don't know if you will be able to understand what I am talking about. But when I speak my mind I just type and type and whatever comes out just comes out and I don't plan on rereading it and clean and fix what my heart spilled
Focus
she reads
her crazy showing more than usual
"I'll **** him"
she says
her jersey accent strong like my morning coffee
"I'm joking"
she laughs
her presence making it hard for me to
Focus
her voice makes my mind think of lazy Sundays
blankets above us like canopy's
awnings that hold nothing but past memories
a glance in a tenth grade math class
suddenly fourteen year old me couldn't
Focus
no she was not perfect
her mind a bit to wild
her eyes a sliver to beautiful
her laugh a tad to intoxicating
her voice a pinch to sweet
her a bit to
Focus
I fell in love  with the
artistic, the crazy,
the jersey girl who with her extensive collection of art supplies
sketched
drew
and painted my world.
every color a pastel oil
every shape a charcoal sketch
everything she touched
vibrant like neon signs and now that shes gone i cant
Focus
M Aug 2014
Oh, darling, my focus is unbroken
until I hear your call
Those few words you'd spoken
In the twenty twelve fall
Spin in my head slightly broken

Boy, I'll never forget you
But I ought to move along
You're welcome on this trip too
Sing with me my lyricless song
We'll search for the greatest view

Trust me, and the church of blue and green
Run through the ultimate adversity
and the ultimate strength will be seen
I'll follow you; invoke my curiosity
even through you're only eighteen

Oh, darling, my focus is unbroken
until I hear our song
an off-pitch love token
soon- it won't be long
before the truth is spoken

And I'll have to get out now
wait, slowly focus returns
as it will I vow
as the pills tip back and the incense burns
Take a bow

The focus is back and your love is gone
the pieces are disconnecting, the house not under control. people showin' up unannounced, not wanting to leave. what do i do?become the bully?kick them out, give them the cold shoulder?i'm not losing the life i have, for some kid looking to get high...get you **** and go, there's the door. this is now drive thru thuggin', no more chillin'.need to get focused, need to concentrate, i'm fallin' apart, used to be on tap,now i need help. my minds always on money, ten steps ahead.now i'm falling ten behind, for letting a stranger in. the boss man's mad,mad as can be. I'VE LOST FOCUS,but i have hope cause, he still hasn't given up on me....focus...concentrate...get back.
if you decide you want to use this please tell me.

— The End —