"dweeb" poems
Doo baa doo dweeb man without woman
and ye vee la lovisha woman without man
be like a tree w/o leaves, & flowers w/ no seed;
******* w/o hash; dat hash w/o ******
**** w/o crystal & drugs w/o tranquilin;
my favourites! - smack...! without brown sugar like sugar with no sweets;
showered on her yummy sweats.
swetean ********* aye plead!
gravity w/o **** be like her **** w/o dopping
bars w/o beers; night clubs w/o Hi-ladies;
hookah w/o "chillam"; & "madira" w/ no trekkies
like a cigarette w/o lighter, & dark jungle w/o lantern,
us men & you women be so incomplete w/o love like me - the Homewrecker w/ no affairs with love dieties.
Sep 19, 2018
Sep 19, 2018 at 8:48 PM UTC
The dweeb lived in the dwellings of a dwindling tribe of dwarves
Who anchored little kayaks at the moorings in the wharves.
He organised this transport so that they might go at night
Deep into the dark dense woods to visit their Snow White.
But the dwarves were very old and weren’t getting any younger
And although they really wanted too it couldn’t last much longer.
Meanwhile the dweeb would study every minute of the day
So studious and serious with little time for play.
The daddy of the dwarfs known as Doctor Joe
Said to him, “Look dweeb, there’s little left to know.”
But still he studied on writing loads of lengthy notes,
Which sometimes he would use to make tedious little quotes.
Until eventually the dwarves found him annoying and real boring
Besides he woke them up at night with his constant snoring.
So Doctor Joe hatched a plan with his little tribe
It was devious and genius and this I will describe.
They knew Snow White was lonely and longing for a man
So this is what they had in mind for this dweeb known as Stan.
Snow White would lie there in a dwam pretending to be dead
And somehow they would lure Stan along to her deathbed.
So they told her that he was a Prince, the great love of her heart
She of course was up for it, and couldn’t wait to start.
Doctor Joe then told the dweeb, that Snow White was no more.
He said that he might save her and showed him to the door.
On their little kayak they paddled up the river
But the dweeb then said to Doctor Joe, “I don’t know what to give her.”
The Doctor reassured him that it would be real bliss
If only one time in her life she had a loving human kiss.
The dweeb replied, “This just won’t work.” So he quoted healing potions.
When Doctor Joe rejected these he suggested soothing lotions.
None of these the Doctor said were right for their Snow White
Only a kiss from a real-man could help her end this plight.
So eventually there beside Snow White all the party stood,
Outside of the stone cottage deep within the wood.
The dwarves should have looked distressed but they were full of glee
And so they had to hide their smiles in case the dweeb should see.
At long last they’d be rid of him, this boring little nerd
Some of them expressed this and they hoped he hadn’t heard.
But the dweeb was now distracted by the beauty of this girl
He didn’t know if this would work but he’d give it a whirl.
He puckered up his lips and planted one before he spoke
Then gob-smacked he stood there as Snow White soon awoke.
Immediately when their eyes met he knew that it was right
Likewise she felt this too, it was real love at first sight.
So you see that all of this now ended happy ever after.
Doctor Joe and all the dwarves left in bursts of laughter.
Dec 7, 2009
Dec 7, 2009 at 11:16 AM UTC
I WANT TO TEASE YOU, TEASE YOU I SHALL, YOU ARE SPASTIC, DUDE I HATE YA
HANG ON, YOUR NOT LIKE YOUR NANNA, LET’S TEASE THIS SHYPERSON, BUDDY
HE IS FALLING ASLEEP, TEASE THIS SHY PERSON
I SAID, I WILL FALL ASLEEP, YA SEE, I WILL FALL ASLEEP, AND ALLOW YOU TO TEASE ME WITH THE COSMOS
YOU SEE, LET’S TIE THE SHYPERSON UP, AND THROW HIM TO THE ALIENS’
YEAH, I AM HAVING FUN TEASING BRIAN ALLAN DEAR CHILD
YOU SEE, I CAN SEE THE MEDICATION MAKING YA TIRED
YOU SEE, ATHENA CAME UP AND PUT METHANE IN MY MOUTH AND TOLD THIS DWEEB THAT
YOU REALLY CAN FIX YA TEETH IN THE COSMOS, IF YA TAKE THE RIGHT MEDICATION
I SAID, I AM WATCHING SOME SNACK OFF COOKING SHOW, IT’S PRETTY RADICAL
IT’S ABOUT THE LATE NIGHT SNACKS PEOPLE HAVE, AND WHO CAN MAKE THE BEST MEAL
THE TEASER SAID, TRY AND BE LIKE YOUR NANNA, CAUSE YOUR NOT LIKE YA NANNA
YA LIKE US, CAUSE YA HOUSE IS MESSY, I AM SURE OF IT
BRIAN ALLAN SAID, CAN YOU LET ME GO, AS HE WAS TIED UP IN THE NEPTUNE PUB
BY OSAMA BIN LADEN AND THE GUY WHO NICKED HIS LINCH IN THE 1970S
IT’S THE ONLY WAY TO GET HIM, REALLY, WELL, IT’S NOT, BUT NOBODY WANTS TO, YA KNOW DO HARM
YA SEE BRIAN JUMPED UP AND SAID, **** OFF, YA NOT GETTING ME, YA ****
AND THEN THE GUY WHO NICKED MY LUNCH SAID, NO BUDDY, YOU ARE WITH ME FOREVER
WE’LL MAKE YOU TIRED, AND THEN SEND YOU TO HELL, WHICH IS THE SUN
BUT EVERYONE SLEEPS THEIR WAY TO FIGHT THE PERSON WHO IS KILLING BRIAN WHERE THEY WANT HIM
YOU SEE THEN SLIM DUSTY SAID I GUESS IT’S LONESOME AWAY FROM YOUR KINDRED AND ALL
FROM THE DUSTY OUTBACK TO THE GREAT CONCERT HALL,THERE IS NOTHING QUITE LIKE A DRINK WHICH
IS MORBID OR DREAR, IT’S SITTING PLAYING POOL IN A PUB WITH NO BEER
I AM GOING BACK AGAIN TO NEPTUNE PUB, YEAH, NEPTUNE PUB, YEAH WHERE WE HAVE FUN, YEAH
WE’RE GOING BACK AGAIN TO NEPTUNE PUB, THE PLACE WITH THE MOST METHANE SMOOTHIES, YEAH
I WOULD LOVE TO HAVE A BEER WITH BRIAN, I WOULD LOVE TO DRINK BEER WITH HIM
WE DRINK IN MODERATION, DUDES, AND NEVER, NO NEVER, GET ROLLING DRUNK
WE DRINK ALL OVER THE COSMOS, WHERE THE ATMOSPHERE IS SUPERB
I WOULD LOVE TO HAVE A BEER WITH BRIAN, CAUSE THAT’S FAR FROM ABSURD
AND THEN BARRY ALLAN CAME UP AND SANG 1 2 3 4 YOU SCHITZOPHRENIC, FROM YA FIRST DIAGNOSIS TO YA CURRENT SITUATION
WITH MEDICATION, YOU CAN GET REFORMED, OH YEAH MATE YEAH YOUR SCHITZOPHRENIC
DAD SAID, I AM NOT GOING YOUR LIKE ME AND MUMMY, ANYMORE, DON’T BE SHY BRIAN, TEASE MY NEXT LIFE’S NAME
I CAN UNDERSTAND WHY YOU TEASE, ME, BUT DON’T FORGET THAT GIRLS AND BOYS ARE EQUAL, OK
THEN THE GUY THAT NICKED MY LUNCH SAID, OK, WE’LL LEAVE YA ALONE, YA NOT LIKE US, BUDDY, OK
JUST REMEMBER, ME, IF YA EVER TRY TO BE LIKE US, YOU WHEN YA LIVED IN WOODBERRY, I’LL TEASE YA AGAIN, OK
Jan 30, 2015
Jan 30, 2015 at 6:49 PM UTC
Eve the dweeb and I are cool
But you is just a Fool
We are the crown jewel
You is just the crown
But do not frown
We are just in Sun Valley Town
You are a Clown
But don't frown
Apr 22, 2010
Apr 22, 2010 at 7:18 AM UTC
Thousands of grains of rice boiled and resting
on the lining of unconsumed human veal. No one can **** the dweeb
who suckered that one kid at the party out of drugs
with the help of the cutest girl there. He knew how to hurt
the best in the world with one word.
Sweet tea and *** goes much deeper than the ribs
and out the back door much faster than a deadbeat dad. The stomach
rumbles the world far worse than a string of serial rapists on trial.
World hunger is a yo-yo doing pendulum swings over summer BBQs
drinking and popping *** and candy from the local radio station.
“I'm sorry I felled you. I should have done better by you. I love you.”
Vague women with just five minute existences of commitments, those Senators of Love
vying for second and third terms
before they sink into those holes in South America you hear about
in the news.
Men know nothing but control. Women know nothing but control.
Numbers know nothing.
Collapsed tunnels in the mind of Prometheus
before calendars and Twitter and liquor
just the dark and blunt
objects
Jan 21, 2014
Jan 21, 2014 at 12:52 AM UTC
*****
****
*****
*****
Nerd
Punk
******
First words out of your mouth
On the last day of my life
So moments before I pass away
I'll take the time to write them all
On the skin you feared would give you ***
******
Transvestite
Dweeb
*******
Seriously?
You don't remember it
The moments we bumped into each other
In almost every bathroom
Stuffing my face into the fresh ****
You just so happenly dropped
And had all your friends **** on me
As you flushed the toilet over and over again
I'm suprised
You were just joking about it in 5th hour
So allow me to introduce myself again
Hi my name is...
Not going to finish the statement
You usually do with
Queer
***
Short ****
My name has become whatever you decide to call me
And never once do you ever use the same one twice
But today I've kept track
Every name
Every moment in my high school history
Hell even in elementary and middle
You've been there every step of the way
Bullying me even more
Pounding me in the playground
Well I guess I'll show you what you called me
With the bruised body you left me
But I'll finish this off with my actual name ************
My name is Robert Guerrero
I was a poet, the voice to all the people
You thought were your stepping stones to success
Now I'm the corpse you left nameless
Feb 4, 2014
Feb 4, 2014 at 2:48 PM UTC
We were both in dance class,
all I did was stare at your ***
while I plunked on the piano.
I was such a dweeb back then,
actually I still kind of am,
but I felt like I had no
chance with you.
But here I am today
with no women in my way
my roommates were still my wingmen.
Apparently you thought I was cute,
in your spandex you felt like a ******
and were to afraid to give me your number then.
Today is my final chance
to see if we can make this last
and let me take you out.
You look great in your summer dress
I'm in my Sunday best just so I
can find what you're all about.
Feb 13, 2013
Feb 13, 2013 at 3:04 AM UTC
Mr. Sensitive
I’m so sensitive to her needs.
I’m so sensitive, I can’t believe,
That she is really going out with me,
When I am such a dweeb.
She is so beautiful and sensitive.
She is so sensitive and sweet to me.
She is so wonderful, I can’t believe,
That she is such a dweeb.
She’s a dweeb, yeah, but she is all mine.
She’s a dweeb in need and you know she’s right.
She’s a complete dweeb and she’s out of her mind;
This lovely dweeb is this nerd’s sunshine.
(C)2016 Aa Harvey. All Rights Reserved.
Jun 14, 2018
Jun 14, 2018 at 5:05 PM UTC
How could a dweeb like me get a girl like you? How could a nerd like me get the hottest girl in school?
Its a mathematical error, a scientific problem. We've broken the laws of nature, such things were never ment to happen.
Yet we are here, and still going strong. With a passion that seems to burn all night long.
The 8th wonder of the world is how such a beauty and majesty, could withstand to kiss a guy like me so passionately.
Feb 19, 2010
Feb 19, 2010 at 6:55 PM UTC
i am a young dude
a very cool young dude
i am happy all the time
then a bully came up to me
and said
i will take your young dude away
you see i go to the movies
and i see a flick that is grand
and then this bully came up to me and said
i will take your young dude
i don’t want that for i am cool, man
the coolest dude in the world
i said you can’t take my young dude away
because you are a spas
i am a young dude
a cool young dude
i love life oh yes i do
then this bully came up to me
and took my young dude away
i love life oh yes i do yeah
i will party like a young dude does
sure i might be disabled
but i am better than this bully
oh yeseree
i might be a spaz i might be a geek
or even a dweeb
but no bully in their right mind
will ever take my young dude away
Jun 8, 2016
Jun 8, 2016 at 6:27 AM UTC
That guy out there doing his own thing:
Yea, he's my hero.
Jun 20, 2015
Jun 20, 2015 at 1:01 AM UTC
I write things that are stupid
and she likes to disagree.
I think these rhymes are putrid
yet, they fill her up with glee.
Nov 7, 2013
Nov 7, 2013 at 10:01 PM UTC
we’re all the same
i am like my dad
i am like my mum and siblings
i am not a dweeb or freak
i am a cool party dude
who loves to party hardy won’t stardy
i am never tardy, in fact, i am a smart a lek
i am the coolest dude in canberra
but i am an adult who really loves to party
a big man sat next to me with his big tattoos and said
hows ti going mate, you have a few great tattoos on ya, don’t ya fella
he said yeah mate i have, i am here to be tough, mate
i am here, mate to have fun, with beer coke and spirits, mate
i will mix you beloved coke with bourbon and get ******
we like to party we like to party
all day and all night
i party on and don’t wanna fight
cause, i am a nice person, a good bloke, so to speak
i never want to fall in a heap
my old best mates don’t wanna be my mates anymore
i mucked with them, cause i and they were cool, i was a little young dude
i hated the mates, who wanted me to fight, i can’t stand fighting, i am nice
my mate pat helped me, he was like a second daddy to me, i liked that dude, where is he
i asked pat to go to a nightclub, the firehouse, and blind beggars and private bin and hungry horse
i went to *** black to pl;ay a computer game, yeah i was radically awesome
look what i done, i fooled my dad and my mum, cause why do they treat me like them
get that stupid guy who nicked my lunch out of my head, unless he treats me like a little young dude
for i am reformed now, i don’t stare wrongly anymore
i still call patrick my best mate, ok, dad was weird, ok
but we’re all the same
Feb 22, 2015
Feb 22, 2015 at 5:56 AM UTC
Trading dishes in sinks for less than it feels,
The fingers become too shriveled to bleed if cut.
Partitioning the mind into three distributions:
Voluntary hand- and motor-functions,
Involuntary goal-oriented guidance system,
And forty percent for the rest.
I take up smoking once more
To talk for fifteen minutes
With a sickly dweeb and serious nomad,
Saying nothing of our kicks,
But planning the weekend outloud For the sake of hearing the ambiance
Before the background
Becomes the out front.
Sep 25, 2014
Sep 25, 2014 at 1:54 PM UTC
Upper
***
Middle
Class
Dweeb
Devoid
Of Motivation
Without Inspiration
To Do
Literally
Anything
With my
Pathetic
Self
I
Hate
The Human
Tease of Life
And Its Dull
Reality
void
Apr 26, 2018
Apr 26, 2018 at 12:25 PM UTC
The hardest part of my day was finding a reason not to
And most nights, that reason was you
Most of the time, you weren’t even there
You were miles away with someone else
Yet you always picked up, or called right back
You listened, you laughed, you made me smile
You let me bleed through the airwaves, you were patient
You never judged though we knew who’s fault it was
(Mine)
You talked me off so many ledges, when all I wanted to do was jump
You saved me so many nights, just by being you
You ended every phone call with “I LOVE YOU!”
Not some secret or shy I love you
No you preached it loud and proud
As if you wanted the world to know it
It made me want to say it louder
But I was afraid of the word
Afraid I wasn’t good enough for you
So afraid, that I didn’t realize just how much I loved until it was too late
You even saved me the first day we met
You were always a superhero
You saw how hurt I was, how shamed I was in the face of her betrayal
Took me by the hand and whispered “Don’t worry, I’ll be your Girlfriend for the day.”
My heart grew two sizes that moment
(Something else grew, but we won’t talk about it)
We made her boil with jealousy
and she ran away in defeat
but you didn't let go there
You held me close through the cemetery
Partly out of fear, but we were both afraid, just of different things
I think that’s why “we” never happened
Why we always loved from afar
I was a dork, you were a dweeb
Our awkward behavior collided like peanut butter and jelly
Like peas and carrots
Like mac and cheese
I still feel it now
At least the memory of it, the shadow of it
Even that’s enough to keep me warm
I still hear your laugh ringing in my ears
And those baby browns
The way you’d smile when I’d pull up
Made me feel like a movie star
I’m a ***** guy, yet your pretty eyes and woman curves
Made me rethink who I was
I just wanted you beside, in front of, on top of me no matter what
I wanted to wrap your little heart in bubble wrap
And cover your ears in love songs
But you wanted stable, I didn’t even know the meaning of the word
I was afraid I’d fall, you were afraid you’d join me
Thus I loved you from afar, and forever will
No, it’s not fair, ******
But the world ain’t a fair place
You know that better than most
And knowing someone as beautiful, as courageous,
As kind hearted as you could love me
Is more than enough to make me believe my dweeb is still out there.
I owe you a lifetime for that, many in fact,
So many nights I would’ve jumped were it not for you.
Oct 9, 2017
Oct 9, 2017 at 5:28 PM UTC
what is a word, what is a geek
it’s someone who is stupid or stuck up
you see a nerd is a self obsessed word for someone obsessed
what is a dweeb, a real dweeb
shut up geek ya dweeb, you really big dweeb
in there **** you girl you big girl
i was born a guy, so i am no girl
you see i like computers, so i might be a nerd
i like sport, so i can see the commotion of why people don’t like me on the computer
shut up turk, you are a fool, what is a turk, anyway, it’s just a word that people use
to get the better of people
what is a **** what do you say if someone calls you a ****
or ******** my head doesn’t look like **** your head looks like a ****
you see what is a dweeb, does it sound bad, it sounds like a word you don’t wanna use
i go to the mall and have a milkshake and you hear the word dweeb ringing around ya head
you see dweeb is not a problem word
everyone knows about the fact that you shouldn’t worry being called a turk or dweeb or geek or nerd
because really they are just words that should be ignored
what is a faggert, just a word young dudes use to be different to the coward calling old men
you see it’s the same as crazy people, who try to keep little cool kids from the family
you see i don’t know what a faggert is despite being told
i hate when men bash women or women bash men or men **** kids and women and women **** kids and men
i don’t like being treated like an animal, i wish they would treat me like a human being
**** is a word and faggert is a word and dick is a word, i don’t get offended by it
i never get offended except for people who have got the wrong impression of me, you see they are crazy people, aren’t they
i like music especially heavy metal, i like sports especially baseball and aussie rules and rugby league and cricket
i do what i wanna do, nobody can tell me to shut up, unless they wanna look like my daddy
dude, i am the coolest dude in canberra and i like sky fire it’s radical
Feb 21, 2016
Feb 21, 2016 at 1:44 AM UTC
We lay our coats down at the feet of Saul,
And stones we hurl, curses and stones:
libtard,
Fascist, snowflake, reactionary, slime
****** demoncrat, shrillary, trumptard,
Republicrap, boomer, millennial,
****** ***** alt-right, leftie, scumbag,
Crayon-people, ***** tape-worm, muppet, dweeb,
Sock-puppet, Russkie, **** trash, and creep
And thus we deny the Cornerstone when
We lay our coats down at the feet of Saul
Apr 19, 2018
Apr 19, 2018 at 2:53 PM UTC
***I think I'm beggining to see what love is
I'm starting to grasp just how bad it hurts to let go
To see them happy is your world
That's all you really want to know
Someday you might meet again
And ask them how they are
And your heart will shatter completely
Because, they've made it so far
Yet right now, knowing that
I love him just that much
To let him go, no second thought
And slowly forget his touch
I'd give up every chance i had
To try this all again
But in the end he'd get hurt
We all know only one can win
I love him, that dork of mine
He is all I'll ever need
I loved him, through thick and thin
He wil always be MY dweeb
But I'd let that all slip away
I'd risk my own joy
To let him grow
To a strong man, from simple boy
I'll forever wonder
What we could've had
But being his once again
Do you think it'd be bad?
I love him unconditionally
I'd give him all he desired
Cause truly he is
The best guy I've ever acquired
Talk to me world
Should i set him free?
Let him move on?
Allow him to forget me.?***
Sep 10, 2014
Sep 10, 2014 at 11:46 PM UTC
Delirious with exhaustion,
both mental and physical,
the young woman dropped herself,
hard and fast, with a mix of
hopelessness and frustration which caught the nursing mother three seats to her left off guard.
The new mom shifted herself so that her back was to the young woman.
The young woman sat motionless for many minutes, staring out at the planes.
I was curious. I was two seats to her right.
I asked,
"Rough flight?" like the dweeb I am.
She turned and looked at me.
Eyes washed red with lack of sleep still burned icy blue as they sized me up.
She smiled almost.
Then she got up and walked away.
I will never know her.
Aug 24, 2017
Aug 24, 2017 at 8:42 PM UTC