"disolving" poems
Wandering, passion full of reality deep, moving in motion, forgetting, just motions expression, time breathes out every cell, though someone says evil chains infect you from end to main, telling you insane, eyes wander through the moment, your life is breathing, skin sometimes grows and gets older
Knives on the table clatter while people force and dishone you
Breathing life like wind, body transfers movement, light shining out your actions, though fading and disolving, touches the future, in a divine moment more real than time, nothing else is seen nothing else is life
May 9, 2016
May 9, 2016 at 7:30 AM UTC
I was walking around aimlessly
In my dream last night
When I finally reached the hill
Between the end of the world
And the beginning of it;
And I climbed that hill
While the light was disolving into the dark
And the sky was blue and red
While the trees were silhouettes
Against the dark clouds.
Then the wind started blowing
And I felt sad and happy at the same time;
I closed my eyes and let it take away
Pieces of my restless soul—
I was dying, but never have I felt more alive.
When the last piece was about to fly
I woke and realised—
The wind was you
And I was no longer alive.
Forever cursed to wander
Between death and life.
Forever will I chase the wind
To get my soul back.
Jan 17, 2017
Jan 17, 2017 at 5:44 AM UTC
~~~@~~~
i break
my chrysalid womb
into a realm
without
protection
my wings
are wet and stunted
cyan jewels lie dew'd
tourmaline
clusters upon the
veins
i'm only beginning
to learn the
nature of flight
i'm at my
most vulnerable
please
protect me
but don't assist me
in my struggle
to break
FREE
~~~@~~~
**it took me
disolving time to
emerge
from my own
beautiful
amorphous mess
while I drew
my imaginal discs
i dreamt
of flowers
and their
everlasting
bursting colors
the
celestial skies
and soft
empowering
spring
breeze**
~~~@~~~
as i push apart
my place of
safety and security
i find the life
pumping
into my
wingspan
the colors of the
world
entrance me
i am no longer
dreaming
as i drink in
my natural
but still
foreign
home
~~~@~~~
**riveting pain
with each
s p r e a d
of these
newly acquiesced
defenseless
delicate
appendiges
this
m e t a m o r p h a s i s
has just begun
my
j o u r n e y
to self discovery
paved with
wrestling and scuffling
everlasting
flight
and
wondering**
~~~@~~~
for it is in the
p a I n
we find
g r o w t h
and in the
s t r u g g l e
against
the
safe and secure
that we
at last
find
F R E E D O M
~~~@~~~
dajena m
soulsurvivor
(c) october 10, 2014
Oct 10, 2014
Oct 10, 2014 at 4:18 PM UTC
I felt like I cried too much just then, with my head in your lap and my cheeks stinging with salty tears.
I want to die today, but I can't bring you with me.
I can't bring you with me in the bleak narrow curvings of my soul absent doubt.
I hate hating myself so much.
When I look in the mirror I judge from predisposed and painted self doubt.
I trim my frame with unrealistic absurdities that make matters worse by setting them self up for failure to begin with.
I do not think one should continue to prevent them self from cutting off their own airflow to preserve another being's feelings.
Though the act of suicide is selfish, and abstaining from the act to keep others from blaming themselves is in fact selfless; however perpetual self loathing is almost as demanding a lifetime of guilt that comes out of wishing you could have done something to help.
I sit on the inside looking out. And more of the time I am perched in there, I am looking around, from within.
Disolving the interior and remembering the good old walls.
What happened to those willful walls and forgiving storage areas? Nothing is ever good enough; like a mingy white room-once coated twice, but over time has been repainted in folding colors, creating a texture that was not meant to gain, nor pleases as a result.
I want all of the excuses and laziness and hastiness to melt away and the chaos that sits with darkness at the corners of everything, to fall away as toxic as they are, and I want to sit outside of myself and watch in praise and humble patience.
Jan 18, 2010
Jan 18, 2010 at 1:21 AM UTC
I see fire
Inside your soul
The ache of distances
Bleeding passion into movement
The wide eyed terror of not
Being there
To see you wake
To share the shaking agony of lonely
Longing to taste your breath
The night burns with the smolder
Of your love
Raw skin
Relishing the intensity of devotion
Of lost time
Shaking on the afterglow of starlight
Disolving me once more
Glazed eyed and clinging
Clenching the stuttering maddness that has possessed my heart.
Only to have you fall
Leaving you behind
The night chokes my breath
And I drown in the wake of fear
Breaking heart to the shadow of chilled sheets
****** to dream of love
To hear the tinkling laughter of memory
Where you walk
Standing in all your glory arms open
Lips cracking that ****** cocky smile
That brings me to my knees
I fall into the flame
Of resentment
I hate you
Just a little in your ability
To smite me with love
To shake me down to the echoing void
Where all I feel is the loss of you
It eats away the corner of my sanity
******
I can't think without the your image
Name or memory
Touching the most intimate integral parts
The bits that are hidden from the main line thought process
You infect me with love
And hang me
With my own hands on the despair of absence
Where I would do anything
Say anything
Take anything
To touch
Hear
Or be
Where you are.
You wreck me
Running headlong
Into the wall
Dec 19, 2013
Dec 19, 2013 at 12:54 AM UTC
Look at me
I'm an illusion
Breathing air
From your lungs.
Look at me
I'm a song
You used to love
But not anymore
Look at me
I'm the dream
You once had
In your open eyes
Look at me
Slipping through your fingers
A flower in the sand
A drunk on the sidewalk
Dying like the hopes
Of those who thought
That love
Will one day
conquer the world.
Look at me
Now
A naked ghost
Searching for a place to go
Away from your storm
Away from your soul
Away from all I used to know
Look at me
breathing
disolving
My own illusion
Becoming.
Sep 22, 2016
Sep 22, 2016 at 4:40 AM UTC
Sowing seeds of kindness
Kindness breaking down barriers
Barriers disappearing into streams
Streams flowing into laughter
Sowing seeds of laughter
Laughter erasing all sadness
Sadness disolving into ripples
Ripples widening into smiles
Sowing seeds of smiles
Smiles lifting all heaviness
Heaviness turning into happiness
Happiness wanting more joy
Sowing seeds of joy
Joy nullifying all defeat
Defeat turning into victory
Victory demanding more sowing
Dec 14, 2020
Dec 14, 2020 at 9:48 AM UTC
Love, if I cry it will not matter,
If I weep you will not suffer.
Honey, when you laugh; I do not care
and when you flinch, I do not move.
Death, Yes you! Take my husband well,
For he is none more than the word pitiful.
Unto thine I am a classic material-
Mearly here for thine image.
Unto thine woed, am I?
For I do not blink
and not do I smile;
I am far past filled by thine not feeling.
I am a cotton dropped on floor-
soaking in everything I touch,
Everything I breathe;
Whilst feeling any feeling at all.
I am a whiteboard marker pen, getting used up daily dry.
I am salt in the bath-
slowly disolving,gone.
I am the darkness in the night,
Giving way to another day.
May 15, 2014
May 15, 2014 at 3:15 AM UTC
It's funny
Time is wasting
We laugh, it's funny
The world is drowning
It's funny when you think it
It's funny when you say it
Moments are disolving
Nostalgia is a drug
It's funny that we're plastic like dolls
Laugh all we want, time is in our hands
To numb the pain, take a handful and swallow
Pills make the world look funny
It's funny
It's funny
They chanted, they all were nostalgic and dying
People were drugged with nostalgia, the world drowned, and time was gone
It's funny
It's funny
Time echoed back
It's funny how they thought they were in control because
Time laughed at us
Time waits for no man
And no man waits for time
It's funny, said we
Feb 13, 2018
Feb 13, 2018 at 2:34 PM UTC
i break
my chrysalid womb
into a realm
without
protection
my wings
are wet and stunted
cyan jewels lie dew'd
tourmaline
clusters upon the
veins
i'm only beginning
to learn the
nature of flight
i'm at my
most vulnerable
please
protect me
but don't assist me
in my struggle
to break
FREE
~~~@~~~
*it took me
disolving time to
emerge
from my own
beautiful
amorphous mess
while I drew
my imaginal discs
i dreamt
of flowers
and their
everlasting
bursting colors
the
celestial skies
and soft
empowering
spring
breeze*
~~~@~~~
as i push apart
my place of
safety and security
i find the life
pumping
into my
wingspan
the colors of the
world
entrance me
i am no longer
dreaming
as i drink in
my natural
but still
foreign
home
~~~@~~~
*riveting pain
with each
s p r e a d
of these
newly acquiesced
defenseless
delicate
appendiges
this
m e t a m o r p h a s i s
has just begun
my
j o u r n e y
to self discovery
paved with
wrestling and scuffling
everlasting
flight
and
wondering*
~~~@~~~
for it is in the
p a I n
we find
g r o w t h
and in the
s t r u g g l e
against
the
safe and secure
that we
at last
find
F R E E D O M
~~~@~~~
dajena m
Write of Passage aka
soulsurvivor
(c) october 10, 2014
Mar 23, 2022
Mar 23, 2022 at 6:28 AM UTC
When the rain is falling from my eyes.
My heart is a rock - My face is a sigh
I want to tell this world goodbye
But look at your little face and smile
Tenderness and love seep softly through
Disolving the pain
Suddenly my tears become heavenly rain
Aug 22, 2016
Aug 22, 2016 at 3:00 PM UTC