The time is too late
Flee from me hate
I now open the gate
The time is too late

It's already begun
Radiant is the sun
I now cease to run
It's already begun

Dishearten my fear
Falls not my tear
For you, my dear,
Dishearten my fear

Warning: Use dis list in context.*

You decide on which side you fall.

disappear
disregard
disaster
displace
disqualify
disrepair­
disturb
dissipate
disability
dispose
dismal
distribute
distrust
­disturb
discriminate
discuss
disdain
disguise
dishearten
disinher­it
disown
disparage
disagree
disgruntle
disclose
discolour
disput­e
disarm
discover
disassemble
disadvantage
disallow
dispossess
di­scontent
discontinue
disrespect
disincline
discomfort
disrepute
d­ishonest
disillusion
dishonor
dismiss
disobey
disjoin
disappoint
­discipline
discord
discern
discrete
disfigure
disconnect
disappro­ve
discharge
disbar
disease
discord
disfavor
disengage
disassocia­te
discipline
discount
disembody
displace
dissaray
disembowel
dis­combobulate
discredit
discourse
disentangle
disenfranchise
disemb­ark
discard
disburse
disbelief
discover
disable
disagree
disinteg­rate
dismay
dispense
dislodge
disclaimer
disapprove
dissatisfy
di­srupt
dispel
dislike
dismantle
disloyal
disbatch
disrobe
disperse­
display
disaprove
disciple
disavow
disconcert
disinfect
disorder­
dismal
dismember
displease
dissemble
disunity
dislocate
distort
­distrust
distress
dissolute
disassociate
distill
discect (?)
distemper
distain
distasteful
distraught
dissolve
dissonant
d­issuade

And dis isn't de end.

The leeching color from my eyes
My parched mouth puckered
My joints are stiff, stubborn and brittle
Creaking like exhausted floorboards
Wringing my fists, white ands shriveled
Twisting my hands, skinned and raw
I'm ill with desperate thriving
Too weak to carry on, don't have the choice
Veins laden with liqueur, thinning hopes and regret
Pulsing pulsing pulsing
Bones fluttering with birds of bad omen
Scalp rid of hair to make place for the thorny crown of vanquishment
Blood diluted with bitter disappointment,
Sloshing, smearing through my mucked-up system
Aching from the deadly drone of existence
From small victories, large defeats
I'm the mortar, they're the pestle
Clobbering into my hollowed life.

The hammer of that thing
Routine so dull and tedious
Pounding and pounding and pounding
When you can't even scream or weep
Thud thud thud
My temples scream with dank submission
My brain is reeling, hurling from the vertigo of it all.

Morning, noon & night
The dead avenues, the empty buzzing
Beats hammers in my brain
Throb throb throb
I'm quivering with numbness.

I'm mature now, I'm ripe
So ripened and rotten
Adult things, adult preoccupations pulsing around me
It seems like person really only has two choices
Get in on the aimless hustle or be forsaken
I've taken it all up
Rent, coffee, wine, cigarettes and newspaper
Forgotten pills
Unpaid bills
Thump thump thump
Anguish, pain, woe and misery
Turbulence and stress, the banging hammer.

I'm a drunkard, a wanderer
With a beaten, battered suitcase
Days like these, weeks like these, when all the weapons are pointed at me
I'm a ***, an outcast
A pigeon in the pummeling rain
Dribble dribble splash
The ache is a relentless thing.

My job, my rent, my house
My walls limp with memories stuck with rotting glue
Wallpaper torn, curling at the edges
The cold hard floor radiates and screams
The couch, cold & hollow
Incrusted with bits of filthy grime
The dead radiator hisses like an angry snake
The shades down, no sunlight
No life seeping through the venetian blinds
And my clothing sits in the chairs
Like the dead emptied out
The blankets are thin, frayed and tattered
As hope is
The moths, on the other hand, are alive and well
They weave webs of moribund rot
Interlacing me into their strands of decay.

Surrounded by the coldhearted, they snarl
And their laughs abash, dishearten the pure
Bruising me relentlessly
They are so tired, mutilated
either by love or no love
All their bleak and sunken eyes
All their weak and drunken souls
All their meek and shrunken hearts
Vultures with neckties
Weasels in frocks
Collared beasts, that's all they are.

The mournful poet with the shrapnel wound
Was so wrong
I guess he wanted to be lyrical, but his words led astray
Time is not water
It does not flow easy, smooth and transparent
It drags you into dark alleys and batters the hell out of you
Punches you in the ribs, rips your skin,
Jerks you by your hair, stabs you, disfigures you
Leaves you crippled and broken, gasping for air.

Sweating in a rocker
Lanky skeleton hands clasped, praying- for what?
I'm not living, or dying
I'm simply crawling backward
Or no, I'm not crawling, I'm being dragged,
Through nights of lonely perfidy, breathing the beaten dusty air
The dark wind wailing, ebbing through the frail curtains
Laying in bed, too wretched to move
When memories, of heaven and hell,
Droop like broken shades
Across the window of my mind
And ****, I can feel my soul slowly dropping down through the mattress
My stomach is heaving, my teeth clenched and gritted
But not with fear, no, it's too late for dread
And it *****, because we realize we were all so caught up in a life in which we can find no meaning...we end up wrong and graceless and sick
We're born shriveled and alone, we die shriveled and alone
No matter what.

You go on your own
But you don't want to
Its crowded and loud
And the groaning and moaning
Only serves to dishearten you

You're told that is good to go
But the pain your body feels
Tells you that's not so
You can leave if you want
But you don't want to appear weak

When you finally decide to quit
Your body beaten down and sore
There is no sense of accomplishment
Just the nagging pain in your limbs
That tells you you can't take much more

You shuffle your feet
As you head to the door
Trying not to show any pain
And concentrating on not falling to the floor
As you get into your car
And wonder,

Why did I join a gym?

Yes.
I know.
It is irrational for me to think like this.
I poke holes, second guess
and jackhammer at my own foundation.
But, you see, I do care even when
I come off as crass or I dishearten
your image of me.

I
Just
Can't
Stop
Myself

These destructive feelings
and urges towards relationships
are deep rooted in a fear
of abandonment.
I'm a battered man.
Batting below average.
Yet, every chance I get
I bunt or try to get hit
because that's more comfortable to me
Than swinging and missing.

But I do care. I really just don't know how to show it.
I hold on too long to brief moments
that seem to pass from memories
as if I stole them. I'm just nostalgic.
It's the little things that are big to me
and the silly stuff that resonates profoundly.

I do understand though.
The burden of my depression
rests solely on my shoulders.
It's not something I can brush off or
roll over. I just hope that you all
bear with me as I tunnel my way
out of this insanity.

By Joseph Childress

I have a few free words
To say
Before I'm closed off
In Pelican's Bay
Unnatural Life
An imprisonment threat
To society
With a promise
Kept
Behind steel cages
The metal ribs dishearten soul
Confined solitary
On compounds
That house double dorms
Of noise and solitude
Silently roaring
In a single cell

Once pink now tawny wallpaper peels inside a closet, ballerina
dreams shucking off like husk. Little cartooned princesses cling.
Last holders-on from a 1950's design scheme with all good
intention, twirling memories glueyness is backed seemingly
to astound or perhaps dishearten. In "the boy's room," you
find in the closet an equally petrified, yet opposite motif papered.
It's animated baseball. I remember how quotes such as, "Never
let the fear of striking out keep you from playing the game,"
did don those walls back in the day. I think it was Babe Ruth
attributed to that one. He and I were supposed to have shared
the same birthday, but I must confess, it stopped right there.

Eventually, that was all figured out, and I have no lamented
grievances for what parent's wishes were for their children's
would-be assigned roles. It was and is still popular to choose
decided decors as such. Who is to know how Bobby may envy
tiny dancers chosen for his sister's room or how Sue might prefer
basketball or even hockey? Even more politically correct
consciousness is a confusing choice. Who gets the dinosaurs
and who gets the daisies? In any case, no one papers the
closets anymore. So, when the time comes for cleaning out
old spaces and memories, future grudges might be less frequent.

Creator, for you are that and more,
Of that precious life unknown before,
We celebrate, clap hands, and shower
With praises, for ‘tis you we admire.

The sounds of your child’s brazen cry
Do not dishearten, but with a sigh,
A breath, of acknowledged encumbrance,
And your power soothes into a trance.

As your child dreams on, you smile
A knowing kind of love, grace and style;
These are your modes of admiration
For the child of your creation.

Be godlike, preserver of nature;
Whenever your child is unsure,
Reassure him with your wit and charm,
Your tender care, to keep him from harm.

i can only write poems about whatever things dishearten me;
i can never bring myself to write anything about you.

loneliness
dejected from being alone
cast down
dishearten
lost spirit
sadness
gloom
sorrowful
distress of the mind
emptiness of the heart
suffering of the soul
loneliness

Powder of ashes like snowfall in winter

The air and army withered in a splinter

Smoky-grey flaky leaves dead and forgotten

Each cobblestone tinted and tainted

Things of dishearten

I stand in the middle of a big large road

With ashen embers resting on my lashes

My coat and tote limp from the bashes

People lay, some far away and some grey,

The death spell cast on all the bay

I feel a tug in my heart,

Shocked at the sight

Cursed fates for a deadly plight

I stand alone, guilty for having survived

No goodbyes or funerals to leave me teary-eyed

The carpet of carcasses in front of me lay

Left me with loud realization of a lonesome foray

I wished I were blamed for their unjustified departure

Or for my survival inexplicable in any form of literature

The sky now looks a faded rotten orange

With the embers settled like a thick mat on the ground

Suddenly the sound of tip tap made me jump

From my lost thoughts.

My coat and tote comes back to life

I feel a tug and around my calf a hug

The most innocent eyes looked up at me

And said, “Mommy, I want to go home please…”

Myths and legends,
That’s what you’ll get in your dreams today.
Sleep on your broken glass floor,
scream! Scream!
Look at all the fake faces on the floor,
designed by your deep-tempted blood.

Slip onto the corner of 5th,
come lay on the grass from our divine god,
come drink the coffee of ethics,
let us peel your LSD skin,
***** the dishearten world,
look into our dispirit world,
do you belong? .

Go sleep with the drunks,
let them play with you,
lets relive all the hipster days,
when liquor was quicker,
gave us that heterogeneous slur in the chops.
We can smoke all the hale cigarettes
on this earth, but that’s just a myth.

______________

Each day is a test, we must give always our best
At times we are so dishearten, but we've never seen the rest
We painted different colors everyday
Red, blue, yellow but at most white and gray

Each day is a trial, we often collide with betrayal
Parents who don't care to call, friends who are not loyal
We always pray, for us to get bump to a better day
Lovely and pretty not like this a life that is full pity

Each day is a class, a lesson to trust
A teacher at his greatest, a handbook that is finest
It'll get better someday if only we'll learn from the best
Else we will not able to see the rest...


Written: October 15, 2014 @ 6:15

Mysterious Aries

half-hearted fluctuations
my worries deserve a standing ovation
the feelings never really go away do they?
even though I see you physically
I know you’ll never ever love me
toughest of luck knowing these things
if only the rejection didn’t have to sting
why do I wonder if you like me
if not a flirtatious moment was ever shared
confirmation is scented, it all makes sense
you never once nor will even care

What avails of this sidereal year?
If not my love with me ever.

What if the flowers spread and disperse?
Even they make the earth paradise.

What though sweetest your incessant loving be?
If now you're receding from me.

What lies behind your heart to reside far?
To me it seems all, you rift through the clouds like a lone star.
Is it a gentle pride?
It’s your fallacy my beautiful bride!

Afraid of your restless youth and irresistible trait,
I am drawn so close to you; so no one can drift us apart.
My thoughts in your mind should often come across
A timeless true love in your mind brighter than luminous stars
That you never forget.

Playing hot and cold never dishearten the resolute.
Give and take in love is an enchanted gift
Never drift away from true love otherwise pain will grow in rift.

Where have you been all this while?
Your sweet incessant love beguile.

Setting moon besets, between us flitting moments
Wretchedness came upon in disappointments.
The days, the moments and the years all unfetched begone.
All this time, our feelings had never lain dormant and forlorn
There you dear staring at me willingly,
Yet looking upon your grace continually.

It was my father who left me,
To discover a place of his own,
Lonely, but dishearten I felt,
For a place called “unknown.”
Baffled was I,
As to why he suddenly left me,
I trembled alone in fear,
Was I a goner soon to be?
Where have my hopes gone,
Withered away to stone,
Leaving nothing but the past,
For a place called, “unknown.”
Why do I feel resentment?
My father had a horrifying tone,
Had left me heartbroken,
For a place called, “unknown.”
My heart beats like thunder,
As I shiver to the bone,
My father ruined me,
For a place called, “unknown.”
Where will I go from here?
Too much my father had shown,
A martyr my father will always be,
For a place called, “unknown.”

It was my father who left me,
To discover a place of his own,
Lonely, but dishearten I felt,
For a place called “unknown.”
Baffled was I,
As to why he suddenly left me,
I trembled alone in fear,
Was I a goner soon to be?
Where have my hopes gone?
Withered away to stone,
Leaving nothing but the past,
For a place called, “unknown.”
Why do I feel resentment?
My father had a horrifying tone,
Had left me heartbroken,
For a place called, “unknown.”
My heart beats like thunder,
As I shiver to the bone,
My father ruined me,
For a place called, “unknown.”
Where will I go from here?
Too much my father had shown,
A martyr my father will always be,
For a place called, “unknown.”

It was my father who left me,
To discover a place of his own,
Lonely, but dishearten I felt,
For a place called “unknown.”
Baffled was I,
As to why he suddenly left me,
I trembled alone in fear,
Was I a goner soon to be?
Where have my hopes gone?
Withered away to stone,
Leaving nothing but the past,
For a place called, “unknown.”
Why do I feel resentment?
My father had a horrifying tone,
Had left me heartbroken,
For a place called, “unknown.”
My heart beats like thunder,
As I shiver to the bone,
My father ruined me,
For a place called, “unknown.”
Where will I go from here?
Too much my father had shown,
A martyr my father will always be,
For a place called, “unknown.”

It was my father who left me,
To discover a place of his own,
Lonely, but dishearten I felt,
For a place called “unknown.”
Baffled was I,
As to why he suddenly left me,
I trembled alone in fear,
Was I a goner soon to be?
Where have my hopes gone,
Withered away to stone,
Leaving nothing but the past,
For a place called, “unknown.”
Why do I feel resentment?
My father had a horrifying tone,
Had left me heartbroken,
For a place called, “unknown.”
My heart beats like thunder,
As I shiver to the bone,
My father ruined me,
For a place called, “unknown.”
Where will I go from here?
Too much my father had shown,
A martyr my father will always be,
For a place called, “unknown.”

It was my father who left me,
To discover a place of his own,
Lonely, but dishearten I felt,
For a place called “unknown.”
Baffled was I,
As to why he suddenly left me,
I trembled alone in fear,
Was I a goner soon to be?
Where have my hopes gone?
Withered away to stone,
Leaving nothing but the past,
For a place called, “unknown.”
Why do I feel resentment?
My father had a horrifying tone,
Had left me heartbroken,
For a place called, “unknown.”
My heart beats like thunder,
As I shiver to the bone,
My father ruined me,
For a place called, “unknown.”
Where will I go from here?
Too much my father had shown,
A martyr my father will always be,
For a place called, “unknown.”

Why are you invading this space in my mind? This place where my most intimate thoughts of you live, I can't close my eyes without seeing your face painted in my memory.. Your eyes piercing through my soul, your words in my head. I'm trying to escape you. I hate that can't live without the sweetest taste of you.. Echoes of silence of the words we shared.. Fearing the wanting of you... Someone else filled my shoes. Empty spaces in the places you've once layed in.. I ask that this soul bared to you is handled with delicate hands... Those hands that's once touch this flesh.. Kissing the lips of death of the love that has died inside of you. Crazy for all of you... Letting go of the hopeful beginnings I thought we could share... Misunderstanding these emotional turns... Upside down in this world we live in.. Why couldn't we just shun out those dishearten words told by those who couldn't understand.... Bare hands hold me in the mist of grief... I carry your heart with me... I won't let go until time allows me... Until time sets me free of the love we have shared.. Free of all things that surround you... Free of all of things that remind of..... You.

Her eyelids art now closed
Yet I shalt wake them up
By a chalice of mine love
Sealed taped and shut
Dancing on the moon wings
With mi amour' at hand
Lovers of ancient delicacy's
Strong and tithed by crayons
Crayons of red
To equal out to
The blood upon ourn hearts
Whilst the rest shalt scorn us
And ****** us with darts
We walk alone
The high veil
With a cloak to shun the rest
Making love inside a cosmos hole
Making it ourn best
No solitude
All openness
A long and sought out night
Candles to be ourn lantern ways
Delighted us by sight
No frights nor goons to dishearten us
For this is ourn own tale
Wherein nothing comes between us
una reina y rey ​​de amores grial!!!!

It was my father who left me,
To discover a place of his own,
Lonely, but dishearten I felt,
For a place called “unknown.”
Baffled was I,
As to why he suddenly left me,
I trembled alone in fear,
Was I a goner soon to be?
Where have my hopes gone,
Withered away to stone,
Leaving nothing but the past,
For a place called, “unknown.”
Why do I feel resentment?
My father had a horrifying tone,
Had left me heartbroken,
For a place called, “unknown.”
My heart beats like thunder,
As I shiver to the bone,
My father ruined me,
For a place called, “unknown.”
Where will I go from here?
Too much my father had shown,
A martyr my father will always be,
For a place called, “unknown.”

There is one moon
On this earth
Which I look at
Most of my night

Since I was a little girl

It always seems so beautiful
And mysterious

Something to be discovered
Whenever I look at it

Always seems unreachable
Even when it came to stay so near

Close to my heart
As I reach out to discover
The darkness wrap me
And I lost sigh of where
The moon was last at

I stayed up every night
Looking at constellation of stars
But I see no moon

And it dishearten me
As it seems I have slipped away
S
    l
       o
          w
               l
                  y

Without meeting the moon
which I've seen since I was a girl

DON'T LET RESULTS DISHEARTEN YOU.
Christian faith is ease not anguish.
It reveals a high example.
Jesus shows us how we should be
and behave to be His blessed ones.

He would like us to be warriors,
to defend His creeds and teachings.
He was not afraid of fighting
even when it meant His torture.

He was counting on His Master,
Who conferred on Him great power.
All His gifts could give the spirits
which might not yield instant profits.

Christ could do what was perfection
but if failure bled His forehead,
He would say," l did my utmost;
the results come from my Father."
BY JOSEPH ZENIEH
ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
____________

I want to break the tiny bones
in my fingers and crunch my hands
into crumples of blood and skin.
I want to break all of my possessions,
I want to shatter glass and crunch it
into tiny shards with my palms.
I want to cause a collision,
to run my car into another,
to watch matter bend and implode.
I want to hear the echo of inconvenience,
to discomfort and dishearten.
I want to set the world on fire
and to reciprocate the feeling of contempt
I hold with a tight grip.

I am a mountain
My edges untamed
These forests entangled
Are thoughts in my brain

These caves in my rock
Where silly things dwell
These spaces all within me
Hold feelings as well

Now slopes may dishearten you
For it's such a steep climb
But grasp the roots of faith
And you will scale them in time

I am a mountain
From where you stand, I look grey
But if you climb a little higher
You'll see where worlds of color lay

I hope you know that him not wanting to be with you is not because you're unlovable, undeserving, undesirable or undateable.

Please do not let one man, or any of them, ever leave you feeling that their inability to love you in the way you want, need and deserve means that you will never find the romance you're after.

Sometimes, and of course, he will never admit this but, you scare him most beautifully. He's scared because he knows that you're the real deal, and maybe, right now, that's not what he wants.

You don't want to be with a man who has to lose you to finally wake up to himself and realize you are in fact what he wants, or, on top of that, a man who wouldn't even care if he never hears from you again.

The cruelest thing he can do is be afraid of you and your love, but leave you in the dark and questioning everything you are and everything you're worth because of his uncertainty.

We grow attached quickly, we get our hopes up when deep down we know we shouldn't, we hope that they'll want us in the same way we want them and we make them our everything.

When things don't work out, we end up wondering why we're not enough and why it is that the ones we always seem to want never want us back. we take it to mean that no man could ever love us for us.

If only we could realize that the person we're chasing after isn't the one for us. I'd like to think the one who is, is the one who will consciously choose us every day and there will be none of this wondering and wait for nonsense with them.

The one for us will fill us up with so much love that we'll never feel that we'd need to change for him or that we could never be the only woman he acknowledges and adores.

Please take a moment to accept that no matter how much you care for him, how much you want him in your life and how much you want him to want you, it doesn't mean that he's the one for you.

He may be the one you desire, but is he the one you deserve? You deserve someone who will realize how pure your heart is and how much you're willing to do for them and would never dream of risking or losing that.

You may think he's the guy of your dreams and he ticks all the boxes, he's the one you' be proud to show off to the world, he's the one you will never be able to find again, but is he really all of those things and as dreamy as you make him out to be when he treats you the way he does?

You don't deserve the guy who is inconsistent and indecisive. The guy who is sending you mixed signals. The guy who is endlessly coming up with excuses. The guy who makes promises he can't keep. The guy who keeps letting you down.

Remind yourself that him not wanting to be with you means that the love of your life is still out there and if it means you had to meet him and have your heart broken and your spirits crushed to realize that, then at least you can walk away with a clearer idea of what you do what in relationship.

Letting go of him and the hopes you built up in your mind will be hard, but you need to pinpoint when someone is taking you for a fool and for granted and to know that you're destined for more than that. The love you want is out there, don't let him make you believe it isn't

Believe in true love even though you feel so far away from it or it seems impossible that it exists. Don't let these men play with your heart and your feelings to the point where heartbreak and hurt are all you begin to except people.

Maybe he's looking for something or someone else, and that's perfectly fine because who says he's the only person in this world you but you? Who says that he should be all you know when there's a bigger world out there beyond him that you refuse to see and explore?

You know what you have to offer, you know that when you love,  you love fully and unapologetically, you know that one day you can make a man really happy and that you have a heart that’ll never turn cold no matter how broken it is, so don’t let these men dishearten and discourage you.

Don’t let them change or crush you just because they weren’t looking for something deep, real and meaningful as you are. The attraction and connection you had with him is something I promise you, you can and will find in someone else.

Keep in mind that some people have no shame or regret in breaking other people’s hearts for their selfish reasons, and not because they’re the perfect catch or confident but because they need an ego boost and someone to make them feel less lonely until someone else comes along.

Some people lose out on beautiful things, experiences and people all because they don’t seek, or are incapable, of building a true connection with it and instead, see it as something temporarily fulfilling rather than everlastingly enriching or enough for them.

He isn’t one of a kind, he’s just the kind of guy you thought you had to be with and your heart truly desired at one point in time.

You’re not just letting go of him, you’re letting go of everything you imagined he was and everything you saw in him that you felt you needed, but you’re well and truly better off without.

Let’s hope he one day finds what he’s looking for when he’s finally ready because we both know you’ll find it one day eventually and when you think of him, it won’t hurt as much as it does now.

Believe that your ability to love and feel deeply will one day be appreciated rather than taken advantage of