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Cassia Jul 2018
It feels as though you drift away
As if you're bored with me
It feels like I should disappear
If we can never be

But even so I'll let you choose
I don't know why, but yes
I'll let you choose because I know
You'll choose what you think's best

Despite the distance there will be
I'll be okay, at least
I'll create a world inside my mind
Where we can be at peace

Inside that world I'll fly away
Leave the chaos far behind
I love the real and adore the false
So I'll blur the lines of time

This is the last time we shall speak
With open hearts in true
So with that knowledge I'll just say
I'm still in love with you
jane taylor May 2016
enter
unnoticed
like a whisper
in my soul

cradle me
in your arms
don’t leave
me here

alone
inside my skin
howling
hollow wind

fill me up
drink me in
or
i’ll disappear

©2016janetaylor
Shofi Ahmed May 2017
The rose will disappear
in the shadow of the night
for a moment or two.
Just for a cool break
only to bloom on the Moon!
Esther Krenzin Nov 2018
A fragile shell of what once was,
decimated beyond comprehension.
Shards of a old life slipping away,
into the silent empty space.

Memories of loved ones,
eluding desperate hands that reach and seek--
For what is buried beneath the dust.

Submerged in perpetual darkness,
the stars have lost their light,
the moon has lost its glow.
Every infinitesimal shard of your very essence,
is engulfed in the empty space.

The empty space that exists outside time,
awareness,
and matter;
Hides in the desolate corners of your mind.

A invisible fog covers your soul,
stealing it away like a thief in the night.
And you are left unreachable,
a blank page in a book full of blotted ink.

The ones who loved you with every breath in their lungs,
surround and overwhelm with tear filled eyes.
Utterly helpless as you disappear.

Years pass,
and
you
Fade.
Vanish.
Evaporate into the empty sky.
Dead to yourself.
Dead to the world.
Dead to the ones who loved you most.

And though your gone, an empty space lingers in your wake.

-Esther L. Krenzin-
-Roguesong-
For Grandpa, who was diagnosed with dementia when I was five. He has disappeared and I cannot see anything but a broken shell.
She Writes Oct 2018
I am a gentle rain
On a cool spring day

I will provide you sustenance
Help you grow

Gone as quick
And softly as I came
Hungry Panda Oct 2018
I look down at my hands
There I see they seem to be fading away
I feel like a pill dissolving in a cup of water
I can no longer see my hands
Just a blur of my wrists
The fading continues
Why do I have to leave when everyone else can stay
I am leaving
Leaving forever
I try to call for help
But no one answers
I see everyone else carrying on
but no one talks
No one helps
I can tell they know I am here
Side glances
Whispers
They know I need help
Maybe they just don’t want to
Maybe they don’t want to be needing help too
Loneliness isn’t contagious
I am fading more
Now I know they want no part of me
Now I am almost gone
I will be gone forever
I wonder what they will do
When I am gone
I don’t think they will care
If they don’t care when I need help
Why would they care when I don’t
Druzzayne Rika Jul 2018
Colours mixing with each other
there is a new colour born
a new shade
taking the new shape
blinding the landscape

spiralling out of control
not in hold
spilling its content
without intent
ripping over
and under
unclear
emptying till it disappears
it is gone now.
Marisol Quiroz Jun 2018
i think i might disappear today,
take to the water and wind.
sink to the ocean and fade away
until i have become nothing.


— it’s quiet at the bottom of the sea
I do not know what exactly I desire in this complicated world, only that there are moments in which I wish I didn't exist.
Death is too complicated,  I would rather just
disappear.
into a slumber that lasts for the rest of my life.
life is too difficult, nor is it any fun, I'm not even sure it ever was.


Love is the only thing worth living for, and even that hurts.
w y n n e Mar 2017
57
disappear for a bit, those who look for you, keep them.
Hannah May 3
Sometimes I wish I could disappear
They never guessed this would rip me in half,
This is ripping me in half.
But it’s fine,
It’s just fine.
I can’t get high anymore,
I can’t get high because I need more and more and more and it’s never enough. It’s never enough to forget.
It’s never enough to forgive.
I can taste the metal of a barrel.
I can taste the metal in my dreams—
this is all the life I’ll ever need.
David Hutton Dec 2018
Just imagine if I disappeared,
Would your memory of me be blurred?
Rusting away in your mind,
Leaving me behind.
A face you had known, a name you had heard.
B Elizabeth G Jul 2018
As I lay down in the soaked grass,
The mud squishing into every crevice and nook,
I imagine myself melting.

Like leftover snow in early spring,
When the first showers come and erase the remains of winter.

I am the winter.
The rain dissolves me with every drop,
Until I am nothing but an element
Absorbed by the earth.

And the world forgets I was ever here...
September Roses Jun 2018
Aghhhhhhhhhh
Why is everything so co.mpli.cated.
        Why is nothing how it should be

Nothing good lasts for ever
well it seems to me like nothing good lasts a ******* second

Everything is
Spiralling
Out
Of
Control
          
         Everything was good a week ago
    A month ago
    
Ok maybe not good but better

         Because this ******* life has
        given me the ******* lemons
And although I'm used to ***** lemonade
it's like life still enjoys pelting me with the leftover ones
      
          Until
        I want
    To disappear
Go away
Cat Lynn Apr 17
I am not here, I am not there
You will not find me… Not anywhere

I have not run away, I have not disappeared
I am close. I am closer then I appear

Not sure how to type what I feel
When all of these feelings just make me feel so lost and ill

This is not a rebellion. This isn’t out of frustration
You are not the enemy; I have nothing against your radiation.

In the night I have gone like the wind
But I am alive and well, this is not out of sin.

I am not gone, just hidden away for a while
You know all my locations, all my places, you know my style.

I could be anywhere, but you know where I go
I am not gone; I’m just no longer home… I’m solo

My number code now a mystery, but you know my accounts
You know and have more then what you realize. You have the amount.
You know my people, you know my spots
Although I am physically cold, my heart is burning hot

Forgive me for the pretty little lies, and for my acts and stories
My wrong, my bad, I am sorry. I greatest my apologies.

I am not fooling around with strangers, or with the fools of this earth
I am safe, and I am close by. I am not shutting you out, I’m building my own turf

Watch the black now fade away, the spikes dim and become dull
For I am independently going on this journey on my own, it’s quite the hull

I’m sick of disappointing, I’m sick of the back and forth, I want to truly know
Jesus in the desert for days, Moses on the Mountain, and Elijah with the birds sought Him alone.

Days, and weeks of isolation, alone with Him.
I want to know!!! I Need to seek and find!!! I am so sick of guess’n!!!

As far as I can tell, this is God’s leading, and if it isn’t, He can work it all out
I won’t know until I take the first step into this unfamiliar world. I promise I am safe and sound

Trying to be discerning, and wise with every step I take, as far as I can tell
I can’t hear him when many are shouting. When too many feel the need to yell.

Not abandoning the problem. I’m not abandoning His Call
I am looking for peace and answers. I want to be his Princess. He won’t let me fall.

I don’t hate you, there is no anger or disappointment in this heart
I swear I leave in peace and love, for I am hurting with this part

Dad, I know everything you said and did was only out of love
I know you didn’t mean to hurt and scar me, so I hid my scars with gloves
I know I disappoint, but I contain no anger. I need a moment and time
To ask and then receive, and to seek what I am trying to find
Answers

Mom, you are wonderful and beloved, I’m sorry if I made you feel so worried
I promise you; I am fine and safe and treasured and in good care. Please have no fury
I loved working alongside you and doing what I could to help
You did so much for me, and prayed like a warrior, breaking every spell
Blessing, that is what you are ♥

Rachel, it’s time for me to be trained on how to be a woman of service
I am on my knees like I’ve seen you done so many times. I’m encouraged
I’m sorry… But He has shown me his leading… So, I am just walking forward
I may not know where it takes me… But I swear it is HIM I am walking towards
Boldly

Dennae, I am praying for you and the things you struggle and ache with. I know the look
I’m going to miss your *******-up phrases and your unintentional jokes
But I need to go on a journey with my Savior for a while to know Thy way
He will change your heart, and your desires, you keep seeking His face.
Everything will change when you pray

Amy, I am sorry, but I tried to do what I could to be there for you
I tried to be the big sister I needed to be. I did what I could so you could see Him through
I love you little one. He has an amazing job planned for you ahead.
He has not forgotten nor abandoned you. Because for you, he bled.
Remember His Love

You can come, and see, and visit! You know where you can stop by
I am not dead; I can assure you, that I am very much alive.

Take care of my baby fluff, and the fish down below
Trying to follow His leading, and not drench myself so low…

Time to grow up, time to discover and learn.
He is the greatest teacher; He will protect me from the fires that burn

Gone indeed… But to really seek and discover what is in store
Alone and Solo, I depend on Him to really speak and show. My body on the floor

Don’t be worried, scared, or frightened, for I am in good hands
I love you; I miss you. You are not locked away from my stands

From the darkness, I escape, but only to seek the light
Forgive me, my beloved family… but I need to take this step… I’ll be alright

I may have crossed the line
But I know as long as I seek Him… and Surrender to Him, He’ll make everything fine…

Till I can see you again, Beloved Family
April 13, 2019 - 1:00 am

My Move-Out Poem Letter to my family before I left...
Ashley Chapman Jul 2018
Pressesd tenderly,
your carnal flower opens,
its butterfly released,
hovers like a hummingbird
drinking from the bill.

Oh, I too would steal you away
and cage you happily,
to get under your black-fringed skirt; 
to see that pretty dress,
fly off once more,
and see you bare;
burned now forever in my banks,
a first sight,
of dark curls!

As I think of it,
my desire stirs,
but of us
I have already masturbated twice:
jammed,
hips pinned,
sliding over our wet perspiring bellies,
in our jungle heat:
'cause in the firmament of our embrace
- it's hot -
where glued we **** into each other,
stoking flames,
until sleep,
when we disappear from each other.
My mind crowds,
with niggling neurotic inanities;
yours with manic dreams where bed-wetting criminals in cages beg to be freed,
before better spaces overtake.

When I awake,
I am lying next to you,  
Gwen over the horizon of your fertile valley,
a mountain,
white and reposed.
You,
murmuring desire for me.
****!
I can't wait to answer.

It is late,
late morning,
and we are all half asleep.
You have your back to me,
as we lie,
rubbing feet,
stroking hands,
(the oiled bulb at the end of a finger),
your fine shoulders,
(that delicate but persistent bone in your wrist that stretches with pointed elegance);
as quietly inside,  
(warmly enveloped),
my couched *****,  
rocks us:
each diffusing into the other
like the early morning brew.

Lust and love,
closing-in,
which for a good while on edge had been:
the weeks,
days,
hours;
faint promises from afar;
sometimes a little closer,
our shadows in daylight cross,
as one over the other storms;
and once (or twice),
a sleeve brushes,
even better,
hair crackles,
as a speaking lip touches lobe,  
and for a moment,
taking in the other's scent,
a hint sublimely overpowers.

And these,
dearest of fancies,
are just some,
with which to penetrate your mind,
as you have mine:
the energy of my yielding tenderness,
inviting you to complete me,
as I spread for you with desire.

Much later,
those daring looks you have,
the way you walk our stage:
your beautiful elongated face,
those quick-fire arousing eyes,
your sultry self-assuredness,
your pre-possessing self.

I could talk about your couple,
of generosity,
reaching up,
beyond mere comprehension:
of the fact that I like Gwen
(his love gift for you, me);
but actually,
in truth,
I prefer to take this moment to make love to you;
to say how wrapped I am,
folded in your limbs,
in our mingling sweat;
how with your joy,
you touch my desires,
into yours,
so they flow,
run rather:
honeysuckle from your blessed nymphae.

You love my smell,
you say,
and I dream of gathering you in pheromones,
of drugging you,
of intoxicating you,
so once again you will find me,
take me,
have me.
Entice you once more like a creature from its shell:
Come!
where I can ravish you,
all of you,
lay naked to me,
flesh,
sinews,
everything,
your very bones;
those fine elbows,
those knees I would like to ******* over;
wash their smooth surfaces in my come:
from these cliff heights,
rain ***** on the rocks below.

To once more cast aside your socks and get at your toes,
to pour oil on 'em,
to rub and squeeze' em,
while in the moist cavern of your insides,
we ****,
half washed over by our own tide.
And as we do,
I quail,
speaking sweet nothings of appreciation;
from full lips,
your sounds return,
the hypnotic rhythm of your breath:
I engorge and in our labyrinth,
- the maiden and the bull -
we consume ourselves.

There,
Sweet Lentiform,
you did it,
you got me rolling in flesh,
lusting after your intimate parts,
wanting you in bed as I know you must have me:
pulling me on you,
kissing and biting;
my arousal in your palm,
pops,
as you run a curved finger over my nethers.

Lying,
lying,
side-by-side,
lying prone,
lying ******,
never unconsumed,
because,
please,
please us,
with more;
so rarely,
unfucked even for a pause,
nothing doing more than sleeping and carousing;
our sustenance barely enough to keep us at it,
an occasional comic thrown in.
Oh,
God,
throw the ******* comic at me,
will you?
Beat my ******* flesh with it if you like.
Anything to see you standing in all your pearly naked glory!

And if you can,
keep texting me,
so I can hang on your every word like a ******* puppy!
Beautiful
long-haired,
skin tight,
upright,
wise,
gorgeously wild,
woman ...
Now pull me by my **** into your **** -
where I love it best.
Jordan Rowan Aug 2015
Let's get some sunlight
Let's start a bar fight
We'll take our problems and forget we have to solve them
Let's take two tabs
Let's start a **** lab
We'll cover up insecurity with promiscuity

Let's sleep 'til Sunday
It's only Monday
I have to work at 2 but I think I have the bird flu
Let's call the drug store
Ask for a couple more
Insignificant reality crashes into banality  

Let's make a hash pipe
Out of Brite Lites
We'll quote Pulp Fiction with Ezekiel's conviction
Let's start a fight club
Where we can make love
Punch me in the ear and then I'll disappear

Let's start a new life
But after midnight
There's a whole universe waiting to be uncovered first
Let's make a difference
Let's make new friends
Let's go where the wind blows but first I have to put on clothes
Eleanor Sinclair Dec 2018
Do I dare say that I wish I was invisible
That people didn’t look at me and on the streets I could walk peacefully
No shady eyes or stares
Perhaps it’s my paranoia and perhaps nobody cares
The thing that gets me the most about life
Is the insurmountable amount of hype
I get it’s a gift and believe me, I’m grateful
But this distasteful existence I lead is starting to get to my head
Like the smell of cigarettes in my mothers car
No matter how far the drive I would hold my breath and hope to survive
I kind of feel like life is this way
Because despite my actions day to day I still wonder why I’m here and what is it that I walk on the street and fear
Is it the people and their perceptions
Or is it me and how I view myself
Fearful of astral projecting it onto everybody else
If they thought of me the way I think of me then holy hell what a different world this would be
I can’t understand why I float about here in space
But in case you were wondering I’m here for love and it doesn’t matter if you call me a disgrace
I think the man I’m in love with is from heaven above
And yes it’s unconventional, after all we live in to separate worlds
But he sees me for me and not my childish comments as a girl
For a second can you think what it would be like to not exist?
That’s a crisis all in itself and scientists are always ****** when you ask them what comes next in life for the dead
They can’t wrap their head around not being here
So they discount the new studies that come out every year
I don’t know what to believe and I really don’t care
Just get me away from this place so I can leave and be fine
I want to disappear like an erased pencil line
James LR Jul 2018
This has happened all before
first once then twice then by the score
The stars begin to disappear
Impassioned by their hoary fear
They fade with age as morning calls
To all those who have yet to fall
Beneath the crystal sands of time
They sink to rest with heavy sigh,
And dimming down their milky light
The stars wink out with the night
cupid Apr 29
there's a boy
you see him before you fall asleep in class
his presence kisses your eyelids as you drift away from the droning words of the teacher
he sits in the back of the room, hands tangled in his hair
the next day he doesn't sit in his little corner
he sits next to you
he smiles at you and introduces himself as a name you don't remember
he smells like a few things that don't mix
original old spice deodorant
peach and cinnamon
and ax spray
he grins with canines that are just a little too sharp
he talks with a voice that's a little too far away

there's a boy
you read his writing, poetry and songs
he writes a little too heavenly and too fast
you watch him laugh, he has too many enemies
he drinks a lot of energy drinks, mostly peach and mango and he only chews cinnamon gum
he always talks to you
you make him feel better when he's on edge

there's a boy
you realize you do and don't know him at the same time
he doesn't like bright lights and he's always dizzy
it took you a long time to notice how covered in scars he was
you asked him to sit away from you and he does
he moves back to that little corner
its like his own world over there, he almost disappears
you miss him and the day you mean to tell him that
he's gone

there was a boy
he was like icarus and romeo
you don't remember his name except his old desk still says
mercutio
this may be my favorite
i just want to disappear
get a chance to eat the warming scones from the oven
and just melt away in stars and sky of navy and grey;
i just want to disappear
to fly and to leave anywhere i want or desire or dream;
i'm dreaming of melting away from where i am
for i am floating already,
why can't i just disintegrate altogether;
altogether
yes a distant memory;
forever alone isn't something you would think of until
it actually happens;
although it's not something you realize unless you've
tried love and
and been scared, afraid of what the
person on the other end of the letters is thinking;
i just want to disappear
far away into the hands of someone who cares
not just about my picture but my pulse,
someone who looks not just at my eyes but at each
individual colouring strand inside
my plain brown eyes;
i just want to disappear so no one will have to face
my retched thoughts and unattainable dreams;
i just want to disappear so my friends won't have
to look at a scared
                            pathetic
                     ­              unhappy
                                          awkward
lonely person and have sympathy for me if they even do;
which if i were on the outside of my slinky body
i wouldn't;
i wouldn't just want to leave but disappear for it
seems that it's what i'm best at;
i just want to disappear
from my picturesque world that you couldn't
even take a nice picture in;
i just want to disappear
from my ocean of held back tear,
my shield of fearlessness,
a fake smile that a murderer would wear,
the impression i have on the other lives of people,
and just
i just
want to disappear,
to run away,
and to not have to cause any drama or half broken feelings to anyone,
to not correct people for their non-existent flaws that are really
my own
personal balled up feelings;
i just want to disappear,
fly away into the clouds and heavens of an unreal dream;
i just,
i,
i just want,
i just,
i just want to,

i just want to,

i just want to disappear,

disappear

away

fly away

and never come back
never have my flimsy feet touch the beautiful ground
never let my ruined soul harm a single cell of
anyone worth anything to a single thing;
i just want to disappear
i just want to disappea
i just want to disap
i just want
i just
i






- nameless and remaining
at times of depression of what externally makes me sad i read some audrey hepburn quotes and cried my eyes out while trying to type this into my computer because for some reason i was feeling inspired? i don't have a clue what i'm doing with my life right now so this poem in a literal representation of how it's all going. love this ** Jules
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