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Is it wrong for me to hate you?
Its so hard not to love you.
Everytime I try to move on with my life..
You just have to go and make things all right.
Just know I don't need you.
Do note how bad I want you.
Because when I'm gone.
Thats the end of our song.

Is it wrong for me to say this?
Why is it so hard to move on?
If I  said none of this.
Would you still play along?
As if we're still in love.
Like we never even stopped.
Maybe I should've stop.
Forget what I said, its dropped.

There is something that we love about us.
Its a shame that we both mask it with lust.
Guess we were never meant to be.
That future will stay a mystery.

I remember how we were.
Just years ago.
The world was our own.
And i held you so high.
Stars in your eyes.
How I fantasized.
Until you ****** it up for us.
So now, I'm gone.
Can't take this pain no more.
So tonight I'll give my loving.
But tomorrow I leave with yours.

Is it wrong for me to say this?
Why is it so hard to move on?
If I had not said any of this.
Would you still play along?
As if we're still in love.
Like we never even stopped.
Maybe I should stop.
Forget what I said, its dropped.

There is something that we love about us.
Its a shame that we both mask it with lust.
Guess we were never meant to be.
That future will stay a mystery.
I feel really good about this one! haven't written in months...enjoy all! Thoughts opinions?!?! Im just hoping no one forgot About me. I fell into a bad state of depression but it inspired me to write through my struggles and aftef waiting so long to write something i finally found enough courage to do just that. Thank you all again.
the angels are the sound
we hear when we make love
you say its profound
i say its profane
you say its love
i say its in vain
still i wish you'd hold me closer
and take away my pain
you say i'm a fool
i say you are too
so lets make love
and maybe then
we'll cool down a bit tonight
There is no more happiness
Only the pain
Exist without meaning
I'm trapped in my brain

Each day brings a struggle
I don't want to meet
A white flag; I surrender
Accept my defeat
Written: October 7, 2018

All rights reserved.
[Anapestic Tetrameter format]
Umi Dec 2017
When everything dies an angel plays a tune
When everything leaves me is it bad to assume
That hatred is what keeps me strong ?
Though I could be wrong...
First mother then father now even my grandpa
Have all disappeared...like the lirycs of a forgotten song
Another day ends in defeat, another time I end up beat
Whats the point of ever even trying ?
If I would say that I am okey I would be lying
Its fine to die...we are all the same
Here hold this determinded flame...
Its all I have left....
Will someone take my hand ?
Or did my life already begin to end,
Like my father who has pathetically killed himself
A Umi who is left without any friend
Is worth nothing at all, maybe this is the right time, to take my fall
I cant take this anymore, not the blood I bled,
My vision begins to slowly turn red
Is this what is called fate ? Is this what I get ?
But we are not our past...not our fears..
Please someone rest with me...
Let me breathe and set me free,
Even if this wretched world with all its flaws might be beautiful
I don't want to be part of it anymore,
I want to rise into the heavens and soar..
I want to be free
HELP ME

~ Umi
B Sonia K Dec 2018
Blowing a wind of change
The air rises
As each season passes
The weather is full of surprises
The silent wanderer,
Slaming through the gates
Its force
Almost breaking the nights and days

The cloudy fog arises to announce the morning
Same as every other day, it seems boring
The roads ahead unseen
The air as cold as ice
And dry as desert sand
And we can't see the stars
The weather,
Unpredictable as they come.

Night and day yet unbroken
Standing tall in the face of changes
We're beyond defeat.


©2018 Busola S. kolade
KHAYRI RR WOULFE Aug 2017
I can't hold on,
I can't let go...


I keep on breathing
But each breath is suffocating.
My heart keeps pounding
But in my own blood,
I'm sinking.


I wanna hold on,
I wanna let go...


Smiling if I'm sad.
Frowning when I'm glad.
The past feels like a dream,
The future, a nightmare.


I'm not holding on,
I'm not letting go...


Here's the feeling I can't express:
There's a fret I can't suppress.
Words, thoughts
I've been screaming to you
Come back as whispers
Like I'm talking to my echo.


Tired of holding on,
Afraid of letting go...


I don't wanna die
But I keep on killing myself.
I need a reason to live.
I need the sun to wake me
From my restless sleep.


I can't hold on,
I can't let go...


Hands stuck in the solid air,
Standing on waters, crystal clear.
Hanging on to the nothingness,
Begging for help from the emptiness.


If I did hold on,
If I do let go...


If I fall deep into the sea,
I only wanted to see:
If I disappear,
Would anyone care?
Shed a single tear?
Pull me up here?


As the gravity drags me deeper...
As the light vanishes from my sight...
As the waters conceal my tears falling...


As I keep on holding on,
As I finally let go...
As I talk to my echo...
And drowning...
Written
11 September 2016

Revised
15 November 2018

Copyright
© Khayri R.R. Woulfe. All rights reserved.
Dev Nov 2018
They think I'm a *****-up
I tell myself "well that's fine"
"I'll just prove them wrong"
But with each attempt I make
It only proves them right
CautiousRain Mar 2016
Dance with me and pay the price,
it's no big deal, the music's nice,
a twirl, a tap, why won't you glide?
I promise not to hurt your pride.

My heels click and stomp about,
your feet intact, without a doubt,
but something cracks, between us both,
a shattered, silent, bond-broken oath.

My smiles full of blind deceit,
your trust denied in fast defeat,
I've grown tired of this masquerade,
now you wish you hadn't stayed?

I can't believe you thought you'd be my match,
that we'd make it out without a scratch,
but jokes on you, and me too,
this was our final dance, so enjoy the view.
You thought you could dance with me, but we weren't even dancing to the same song. No wonder you walked all over me, we could never be in rhythm. We were never dancing the same steps.
noren Mar 19
A damaged soul
needs time to heal and get up.
But it is often mistaken for a slain soldier
that lies in the gory battlefield
and trampled upon.

It's defeated, but it doesn't die
It remembers every feet that trod on it
But finds power in the struggle to overcome
the pain of being mistaken - deep within  
It fights another battle which it can't fail to win.
Tanzim Ahmed Aug 2018
The Battle always chooses me
Defeat me
Destroy me
And shatters my heart into pieces
Just to conquer my mind with dark thoughts
Once again.

But I never give up.
I heal
I rise
I fight
I win
Just to get defeated by my battle
Once again.
You win once, you get defeated twice
That's life :)
.
Follow me on Instagram: __poems.poison___
vera Jan 28
when shall i learn that a line must be drawn
for the sake of my sanity
how can i accept my own demise due to my service of others?
i must wash my hands clean of the guilt i possess
for i harm no one as greatly as myself

i swim in oceans of my misery and drown in pools of my sorrow
terror fills my lungs and breaks away at the tissue in them

¨careful!¨ i scream
i cannot allow myself to fall victim to my own mind
the racing and pumping of my thoughts breaking down the barriers i have built
there is nothing left to protect my self-esteem
no armed guards to stop the negativity in its tracks
no brick wall to block the sadness from reaching me

dangerous. is the only world i can use to describe my thoughts
a battlefield of mines bursting with anger
sticks of dynamite, disguised as flowers to lure and destroy
the question is, who are they meant to hurt?

are they meant to agitate me further to turn my back on myself?
refusing the possibility that happiness can be found?
or are they meant to bring pain to others?
to keep me in control of the opinions and decisions of my peers?
does she aim to help or control?

perhaps, my mind is losing track of what i was thinking
allowing me room to doubt myself
is my mind trying to convince me that i am the parasite in the lives of others,
feeding off of their souls
i believe she is right
to tell me that i do things in order to gain
she tells me, that i do not wish to help, only to hurt

i understand now that i am up against myself
left up to my own devices
no one is under obligation to assist me in battling my demons
i will struggle and fight, until my last breath
to let my own mind defeat me, is to allow defeat inside of my own fortress

i will never be unarmed again
- a parasite of my own
Converging night of  a hideous
dream, hitting like midnight
migraine in wintry winter,
pursuing  ferociously,
but all  
a mirage race of fleeting illusion!

Fear in rampaging arrow
Vomiting death in fire downpours​!

Faith in power devouring ravenously
Bringing down walls of death
Exalting valleys
Straightening crooked places
Smoothening rough places
Bringing down proud places.

It's the defeat of a proud putrid night!
Heavy Hearted Aug 2017
to turn into  the whole wide world, the one that I design,
the one with lights of glistening gold
and wonder undefined.
Is to ignore the very brutal truth, on one's own accord,
ignorant and powerful, a
mistake one can't afford.
So here I am, as usual, how deeply I deny,
that "everything isn't so bad"
I stumble in the lie.

..maybe one day i'll get to see, right through the guise of gold-
the one disguising my whole life
the one denial upholds

Goodbye tomorrow- stay away- I wish to be no more.
my heart contorted, my mind deflates as
my soul and spirit tore.
response to Karen O's "Hello Tomorrow"
Deadwood Jawn Nov 2018
Oh my!
             He is in terrible agony.
                  The weight of his sorrow poisons his anatomy.
                            Worthless..
                ­                     Pathetic..
                               Us­eless..
                      Underhand..
                  Aband­oned..
            He feels all these things.
       Let me place my hand on my heart and his;
I can feel it.

Oh my..
Darkness oppresses his resolve;
many demons have followed him.

                                    "H̫̩̪̪͕͈̀a̸̙͔̺̜̞̮̤r̮̗̀m­͍̭̯̟̫͓ y͢o̴͉̱͓̞͚͖̞u͎̣͙͈̺r̨̠̦̰̼̼s̠͎̬̤̹̖̩e͙͘  lf̯̱.̻͉̤͈̘͙"
          
    ­                                                                 ­   "K̫̹̺̻̣̬̯i̫͎̳̦̩l͇͙̞̳̘l̰̪̳̗̠̙̜ ͉̝̺͙̥͇͟y̕ͅo̙̮͓ͅu̟r̹̞͍̠̫͇̗s͓̞͇̥͚e̥̳͖  ͕lf҉̩".̙͈̠̼̭͇ͅ

      ̥"Ma̭͎­k̷̜̰̙̗̖̼e̘̣̳ͅ ̲̲t͍̯͕̱̞̼h̲̥̭e͎̼̰̣̭̹̥m̨̞͕̩̺ ̤̭̲̀ć͇͎a͎ŕ̬̦̳̱̬̞ͅe͕̥̦̗̯̻.̸̰͍͓"


They are tormenting him.
                       My sweet John.
                               As he lays down with constant tears:
                                       Suffering and anguish..
                                              He needs healing.
                            Love and affection..
              He is yearning.
Desperately pleading for endearment.

She threatened to be a ghost and to be far away from him.
Yes.. my sweet John;
how terrible that must've been.
No wonder you feel pathetic and lowly..
My lovely child..

You cry.
                        Lash.
                                            Grit.
              ­                                                Tear.

          ­                                                      Your breath is hot.

                                            Your muscles twitching.

                        Your body shuddering.

Your eyes deadening.

You cry out to your loved ones;
                                 none give you the love you so desire.
                                            You feel cheated..
                                                My darling.. Oh..
                                                      I will heal you now..
                                   Do not resist sobbing upon hearing my words.
                                Sob for me, sweet child.
                            Let me feel your tears now.
                    I am the one who will heal you.
              Bury yourself into my compassionate arms.
          Listen to my heartbeat.
     Come onto me.
   I will sing for you.
You weep louder.
You're convulsing.
Your mouth trembles.

Please leave me and him alone.
Allow him to rest.
I will heal him the way he loves.

John, my love.
                 Let me carry your frail body.
                                   Please let yourself cry.
                                         There is no longer any more danger.
                                   You're lifeless...
                  What has happened, poor child?
Severe marks scattered on the body...

Ravaged.
                          Scratched.
                                                          Scarre­d up.
                                                             ­                             Burnt.

                            ­                                                              You­r hands
                                                                ­                      are callused.

                                                      ­  Your feet are broken.

                              Your knees are blackened.

Your elbows are grazed.
Your wrists bleed.

I will bandage you, sweetheart.
There is no painful disinfectant.
My love will heal you.

Pour your soul out to me.
I adore you, John.
I cherish you, Jawn.

I am your angel;
the one you desire.
I will give you anything, my love.
You don't need them anymore.
Written during a time of horrible suffering. Enough to trigger off despair. I believe I could feel an Angel present.. saying loving words to me..
Kara Jean May 26
The deeper I go the cheaper my soul
I feel the suffication of my existence setting in
How easy it is to hide
No one gives a **** about your cries
Jesus blessed my sin, I'm just hell bent
Here's to the broken life again
CK Baker Mar 2017
its amazing what we’re capable of when pressed;
lunar launches
and shaman healing
hail marys
and fortunes of gold
heavy hauls
and broken borders
war, compassion
and treaties of peace

all those wild and lofty regressions from the mean;
soul re-settings
(from deadly deeds)
scores and scriptures
liberty and peace
walls, asylums
(in the jaws of defeat)
channeled spirits
of warmth
and love
and connection

and sometimes, it’s just a little fodder;
pyramids and viaducts
aqua-lines and chunnels
spider climbs
and deep dives
base jumps near the high wire
gardens and divine art
and even water boards
(for beauty is in the eye of the beholder!)
have a look around
and let gratitude be your guide
Jack Jul 2018
Defeat,
Tired and worn down.
Her tears on a timer,
Ticking with each beat.
Impulse for sanctuary,
It doesn't wither away.
Striving for simplistic,
But it doesn't go that way.
Casting dark spells to try and make it go away.
But unfortunately it just won't go that way.

(C)
He was the ocean; handsome, but yet, Impulsively damaged. He had a sandy heart to correspond his sandy eyes, the moon dismantled that omitted pride he carried at a dead weight; shoveling and reshaping it, so people would see a sandcastle statue assembled in strength. But his washed-up soul and unannounced insecurities were aware of its genuine purpose,
this beach alongside his pupils;
quicksand, he'll sink so slowly in.  Waves in his hair like ripples on his cheeks, skipping stones land at his defeat, he left notes in bottles for you, sank multiple ships for you, because he hasn't the heart to say he's desiccating with the arrival of the stars.. Retracting scars are not too far from gasps for air,  foaming words of crisis by writing in the sand, signaling a light as the last one in him died. You wouldn't understand, the calm before the storm, as valve after valve puncture him. So intoxicating as it drains him, and from within, he's drying out. Sunburns stain him, a smile restrains him,
in an inescapable drought--
All feedback is welcome
So this was posted here a couple weeks ago and, when I went to revise it, it was drafted and came out as new, I guess? :)
Em MacKenzie Mar 13
My light eyes only see the dark
immune to clear blue skies,
indifferent to a bright spark,
and the bloodshot lines in the white
reveal my own confessing script,
the things I couldn’t say that I write,
I couldn’t walk away so I tripped.

You’ve broken me into small parts
reflections of which I no longer resemble,
I’ve looked for replacements in cars, boats and go carts,
but there’s no use to try and reassemble.
If you have my mind, my heart and soul,
tell me what does that leave over for me?
You know I showed you my scars but hid my mole,
but I still don’t know exactly what you see.
Because it starts where it will end
and finishes with infinity,
the primary colours were made to blend
but I’m lacking all creativity.

Your blank stare is elusive as the wind,
sometimes I question if it’s even there
but then I think I catch sight of a grin.
And while I’m drowning in your eyes,
trying to catch the ocean in a glass,
I’ve underestimated the size
and forgot the impact of the last.

I’ve been plagued with a sickness
one that’s lacking any small remedy,
poetic justice sees complete bliss
always inevitably evolve into tragedy.
My eyes are shrivelled, lacking tears
something had to overflow the canal,
still the boat floats and it steers
avoiding reasoning and all rationale.
Because it starts where it will end
and finishes with infinity,
and I’m too beat to pretend,
that I wouldn’t ’t rather be lost at sea.

Life, life has always been too long
but it seems forever with you is too short.
While I reflect on the choices I made that were  wrong,
I’m told it’s now too late to abort.
Life, life has always been too long
but I only started living when I found you.
Because it starts where it will end
and finishes with infinity,
you’re word was broken, it could never bend,
but it seems I’m the only one that’s still fighting.

Because it starts where it will end
and finishes with infinity,
there’s nothing in this world we can’t mend,
but I think it’s time that I stop investing.
Pieces of me
thrown away
like trash
Never consulted
Never asked
The direct result
of another’s conviction
or more commonly seen
consequences
from blind ambition

Paranoid
The fix is in
But no invitation
for me,
former me
or forever me
and all of my imitations
beset by my
limitations

Forwardly I lean
step in between
lines upon lines
hidden;
can’t be seen
Falling ill
Now trapped
by its machine
And from my vein;
My blood I spill

A still surface
with sticky sheen
amber tones
from which
I glean
a reason
Thrilled
What it might mean
A hunger
that
can not be filled

Nothing but lies
giving me chills
A shell
with values
not instilled
Instead
it’s dread
Their words
I’m fed
"Nutrients"
to fill my head

My outer skin
Its layer
thin
Not to attacks
No single act
or prayer
could patch
and fill it in
A hole
that’s black
is my first sin

A game
in which
no way to win
and no ending
once it
begins
With opened eyes
commence to see
The dorsal fins
surrounding me

Head starts
to spin
What could have been?
It doesn't matter
in the end
because
there's nothing
here for me
A demon-like reality

Where what you seek
Placed at your feet
The icing; sweet
Choices; not three
Have cake or eat
One choice not two
But want to eat
and have it too

All efforts
to retrieve the treat;
An outcome that
ends in defeat
A princess swept
off of her feat
But this feature
princess;
a creature
Spirit of
a soulless seeker

Deceitful speaker
Flames;
he’ll eat ya
Offers pain
Can’t heal;
life drained
Then reaching out
to use
life-line
but with each ring
hope further wanes

An answered call
done just in time
The chills
running all down my spine
Stand tall
just like Douglas-fir pine
With racing thoughts
filling my mind
I will be saved
Free from it all
God must exist
No time to stall
In battle
warriors
may fall
but no man's ever left behind

Only to find
With said spent dime
A dynamite kind of answer
-
A type
that might
cause strife
Can't plan for
Needed answer
Plight
like cancer
New chance to live
Worldly romancer
On planet Earth
A tiny dancer

A romantic thought
to think
fight fought
Instead a sinking ship
just dropped
This life?
If could
an ‘OUT’
would opt
No more
can take
Just make
it stop
Written: April 17, 2018

All rights reserved.
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