My shoulders are tense
hands nervous
silence is air- constant and needed

right now
silence is smog
seizing my lungs
demanding on my eyes

my mind, frantic
tells my eyes not to surrender
amongst this deafing silence
people are all around

I must
relax and breathe
wait,
for sound is invetiable - abrubt but equilibrium
it is true- life is about
the smiles and the frowns

I see you sitting opposite me
In the café I couldn't find.
All this flashing time concealed within.
Life carved a few more shallow lines of laughter around your smiling eyes.
Small flutters of emotion play so slightly on the harp of my nerves.
Not the once great rushing torrents I had.
Unwanted and alone.
Your kiss was a tonic.
A sweet poison.
Addictive and stupifying.
I will always respond to your touch
I will akways want it.
The river tgat flows between us is wooshing and whirling with joy, pain and sorrow.
Deafing to me
Silent to you.
You stand at the opposite bank
Moored with experience and knowledge.
And I gaze at you
I see your past through my merky minds eye.
Dumbfounded by youth.
Your crossing, each stone layed a loss, a fling, an insipid mistake.
You crossed to the otherside.
"Come, come" you call
"Join me" you beacon
But I am only learning to lay the stones for my bridge.

Is this how it starts? is this how it all begins? a fight between 2 parents with kids left t c who wins, The deafing sound of voices shoutin about whos in the wrong, I'm done with all the fightin iv fought this war for far 2 long.  
My hearts feels like it's broken,
The airs so thick it's hard t breath,
Wha am I t do now? is it me who's supposed t leave? is it me who needs t go?is it me am I tha bad?
Was this the way it started when she left us with me dad?
But she walked out n left us,she gave up without fight,I remember all the details from tha sad upsettin night.
I was 6 Leanne was 9 R John was only 3, they both stood in the kitchen dad pretendin t make the tea,
Then they began t talk real quite like we weren't suppose t no,but we knew that's never how it stayed an voices began t grow.  Us 3 kids just sat there while the shoutin carried on, then me mum turn t me dad an said her love 4 him ad gone,the shouten stopped he grabbed her arm n marched her t the door,he pushed her out n turned his back her left cryin on the floor.
Back then things didn't get explained n kids never asked why,adults knew wha was best never believed grown ups would lie,
Now I sit here on my own without my baby's here with me,how could I let this happen?why the **** did I not see?
But I won't give up this isn't it coz this is not the end,
my kids r more important than u or any so called friends.
Your stupid to try an fight me,
To make me look like I'm like her,
The only thing she gave me are my looks an curly hair.
I swear u will b sorry u can not take what's in my heart,
I pity those who cross me I'm gunna finish whatever u start.
A mothers love is endless,it's strong n it comes free,ur makin a mistake to try an take my kids from me.
I will never give up fightin until there back were they belong,
the question is can u fight back can u pretend t b as strong

Tears are the silent explosions of every deafing scream you feel inside.

Voices I hear them in my head
Terrorize the waking moments ahead
Hisses of horror deep within I dread
Scornful sorrow inside my head

Behind my smile a painful lie
Of darkened torment in the sky
Sometime the voice of an Angel consouls my being
Praying for my soul collecting the tears am weeping
Deeper in demons live hiding from the light
A hollow abyss I see darkening my sight
A shallow gulp I clench with fear
Then the Demons talk in my ear
"Your Soul is Mine for the taking my dear"
A screech a bang then deafing sound
I feel my body sinking underground
...Is it over? I ask myself ... I hear footsteps coming ahead

A man with a red scarlet a beard and sandals appear
His eyes like the blazing thunder his mouth has a double edged sword
He speaks to the voices and they hear his words
My Guardian Angel assures me he is a holy man the sanctified one
He has come to remove the demonic voices that linger in my life
He asks me gently if I desire holy healing
I bow before him ...suddenly am weeping
The Christ has come to rescue a wounded sheep
He tells me now all the voices will fall and flee
...He puts me under sleep...
A huge white light eminates from his tunic and garments
He touches me on the shoulder and speaks softly
Then with the might of a overpowering force
THE VOICES ARE GONE...the only one remains
Is the one in your heart

The voice of the Holy Spirit The Father and the Son they are 3 in one.
Just remember I have healed you and just as I have healed you I have the power to do the same for others.
Therefore, come now go and sin no more he said.

THE CHRIST IS WON THE BATTLE JESUS THE SON OF GOD.

Don't bore me with your repetitive words
Telling me you love me,when you can simply just show me.
Let your actions speak. Turn up the tangible volume that drowns out the distractions of the siren song.
Touch me,hug me,kiss me. Hold me,talk to me,show me.
Give me Constructive criticism verbally, phyically and mentally.
Be that missing piece of puzzle that complete me.
My passion screams a plea so deafing. That it goes unheard.
Silence,empty hearts,dwelling in the frozen dark wilderness,seeking shelter from the warm nourishment ignited by love sincere flames.

The days, just going past
Everyday time races fast
All brush me off from sides
Within my own fear, I hide
Each step seems weaker
For I am a time seeker
As I try to reach the flowing lights
My vision blurs and I lose my sight
I recover slowly to stable my vision
My mind is locked as it resides in its prison
All I see is the nocturnals creatures in prey
The colors of nature has turned to grey
I rub my eyes to get back the color spectrum
In vain, my ears beat the deafing sounds of drum
My heart is alive, beating
But my brain and vision is cheating
My frame is almost afall apart structure
Breath! Breath! till I capture
The flowing lights
Which I seem to chase on every nights
No! I am not insane
But I also don't feel sane
I am a victim of social wrath
All torn and weak, almost walking to my death...


©sim

You were the ever deep blue destructive tides crashing into my ever crumbling moss covered walls over a mythical lilac sky

Breaking me down to my core ripping away the moss breaking down the stones as if you didn't know they would fall to ruin under your ever growing waters drowning deeper and deeper into deafing silence struggling, gasping for a single breath of air hoping you might pull me out

But the memories of tired brown eyes behind thin glasses to your lightly calloused finger won't let me leave

Once our souls mixed and became a tricolored whirpool of emotions only to fade into calm water before the storm knowing our "love" was being washed away and never finding shore