THE WODEN WESTFIELD CHRISTMAS PARADE




SUE’   HI AND WELCOME TO THE WODEN WESTFIELD CHRISTMAS PARADE

MARKING THE START OF SANTA’S JOURNEY, HERE, AND AT PRESENT

THEY ARE CLEANING THE FLOOR WAY, SO THEIR AIN’T ANY ACCIDENTS, MATE

AND ME SUE LONGWAYS HAS PETE WITH A CAROLD FROM US

PETE’  WE WISH YOU A MERRY CHRISTMAS

OH YEAH A JOLLY CHRISTMAS

A VERY MERRY CHRISTMAS

IN THE SOUTH OF CANBERRA TODAY

GOOD PRESENTS WE’LL GIVE

TO EACH OF OUR KIDS

YPU SEE WE WISH YOU A HAPPY CHRISTMAS AT

WODEN WESTFIELD TODAY

SUE’   THAT WAS A GREAT SONG AND NOW

HERE IS ANOTHER CAROL FROM PRUE

PRUE’   OH YEAH THE CHRISTMAS BELLS

OH ******* WHERE ARE THE KIDDIES

I CAN’T FIND THEM OH NO

AND THEN AS I WALK AROUND WOOLWORTHS YEAH

I FOUND MY KIDDIES, YEAH I DID

EATING CHOCOLATE AND MOTHER HAD TO PAY THE BILL YET AGAIN

SUE’  ME SUE LONGWAYS WILL BE BACK AFTER THIS BREAK BOBBYE SANTA LAND

THE KIDDIES ARE HERE

PART 2
SUE’   AND WELCOME BACK TO THE FRESH FOOD SECTION OF WODEN WESTFIELD AWAITING

THE START OF THE SANTA CLAUS PARADE

AND WHILE WE ARE WAITING, NEVER HESITATING WE ARE REALLY REALLY WAITING

TO START IT, HERE IS A YOUNG DUDE JINGLE BELLS, FROM BILLY

BILLY’  YO DUDES, WE ARE DASHING THRU THE EARTH, LIKE A YO SURFER SHARK

WITH ALL THE PRESENTS IN THE BACK, AND A GREAT BIG DOG THAT BARKS

YO LEAVE ME ALONE YA DOG

I WANT TO SEND YO SURFER TO SWIM

ON EVERY BEACH OF THIS GREAT BIG WORLD

AND RIDE THEV WAVES, THAT’S GREAT

JINGLE BELLS YO JINGLE BELLS

THE CHRISTMAS SHARK HAS COME

TO GIVE THE KIDS AND ADULTS GIFTS

AND ***** TO GET US BLIND

YA SEE WE HAVE XXXX AND VB TOO

AS WELL AS CHAMPAGNE YIPPEE I AY

YEAH THESE JINGLE BELLS ARE  RINGING DUDES

YEAH ON THIS CHRISTMAS DAY

YO, YA HERE THE CHRISTMAS BELLS

ARE RINGING WITH A LOUD SONG

AND THE REINDEER DOES A **** IN THE PADDOCK

AND BOY DOES IT MAKE A PONG

YA SEE YO SURFER SHARK IS COMING UP TO SAY

OH WHAT A WONDERFUL TIME OF YEAR WE HAVE

I WANT TO CELEBRATE CHRISTMAS EVERY DAY

JINGLE BELLS YO JINGKE BELLS

THE CHRISTMAS SHARK HAS COME

TO GIVE ALL THE KIDS AND ADULTS GIFTS

AND ***** TO GET US BLIND

SUE’    SORRY BILLYI MUST STOP YOU NOW, AS THE PARADE

HAS STARTED, WITHN A MONSTERLOOKING REALLY COOL

AND A FEW KABGAROOS AND REINDEERS AND A MARCHING BAND

AND ALSO SANTA WITH A BEAUTIFUL MRS CLAUS

THAT THIS CITY JAS EVER SEEN, AND WESTFIELD WODEN, IS COMING ALIVE

WITH HEAPS OF CHRISTMAS CHEER, AND THE MONSTER ISN’T A MONSTER

IT’S AN ALLIGATOR, OR EVEN SHREK, ******* LOOKS LIKE SHREK

YEAH IT’S RADICALLY AWESOME, AND THERE ARE A FEW PRETTY CHEER GIRLS

AND ALL THE BLOKES SAY, THEY ARE SOOOO HOT BABY

AND MRS CLAUS IS WAVING TO EVERYONE DANCING ALONG HAPPILY

TO EVERY CHRISTMAS SONG PLAYED BY THE GREAT BAND

MAN, SHE IS SWAYING FROM SIDE TO SIDE, DUDES

IT IS RADICALLY AWESOME DUDES

AND SANTA YELLED OUT, MERRY CHRISTMAS ON THE BOTTOM FLOOR

YEAH THIS IS COOL, AND IT’S THE ALLIGATOR, WHO IS THE FINEST COSTUME ANIMAL

AS WE ARE MAKING A GREAT TRAVEL AROUND THE WODEN WESTFIELD PLAZA

AND I SEE THE ELVES KEEPING CLOSE SHOWING THEIR CHRISTMAS SPIRIT

AND EVERYONE IS WAVING THEIR HANDS AS THE PARADE WENT ON

AND WE JUST PASSED A KID WITH A SUPERMAN SUIT ON, HE’S COOOL MAN

YEAH THIS IS RADICALLY AWESOME DUDES

SANTA GIVES ALL THE MEN CUDDLES AS HE TRIUMPHS THROUGH THE MALL

AND AS WE DRAW TO LINCRAFT ESCULATOR, THEY MOVE ON FORWARD

TO MAKE A STOP AT EPIC HAIR SALON

WHERE THEY MADE A TURN AROUND AND ME SUE LONGWAYS

IS HAVING A WOW OF A TIME

AS THE BIG SHEEP DOGS AND OWNERS, AND THE BEAUTIFUL CHEER GIRLS

AND THEN SANTA PATTED ME SUE LONGWAYS, ON THE SHOULDER

YOUR MY OFF SIDER, SUE LONGWAYS, AS ME SUE LONGWAYS IS WEARING

A SANTA SUIT FOR AAA YOUTUBE TV

AND NOW WE ARE HEADING TO THE ESCULATOR, NEAR THE BIG W ENTRANCE

AND THE BAND PLAY RUDOLPH THE RED NOSED REINDEER

HAS A VERY SHINY NOSE, AND IF YA EVER SAW IT, YA CAN EVEN SAY IT GLOWS, LIKEW A LIGHT BULB

ALL OF THE OTHER REINDEERS USED TO LAUGH AND CALL HIM NAMES, LIKE PINNOCHIO

THEY NEVER LET POOR RUDOLPH, JOIN IN ANY REINDEER GAMES, LIKE MONOPOLY

AND THEY GET TO THE NEXT DOWN LEVEL; AND THE BAND PLAYED

HERE COMES SANTA CLAUS HERE COMES SANTA CLAUS

RIGHT DOWN SANTA CLAUS LANE,BLITZEN AND ***** AND ALL THE REINDEERS

PULLING ON THE REIGNS

AND SANTA AND THE ALLIGATOR AND THE GINGERBREAD MAN WAVED

TO ALL THE KIDDIES AS THEY MAKE IT THROUGH

CHRISTMAS IS HERE AND PEOPLE ARE EATING LUNCH AS

WE ARE PARADING THROUGH THE FOOD COURT, OH YEAH

AND ME SUE LONGWAYS, THINKS THIS IS COOL, MAN

EAT MY FLAMING SHORTS, LIKE BART SIMPSON SAYS

AND SANTA AND THE ALLIGATOR ARE WALKING PAST HUNGRY JACKS AND MACCAS, YEAH MATE YEAH

YA KNOW, HAVING A WOW OF A FLAMING TIME

AND THEN THE BAND PLAYED

YOU BETTER WATCH OUT, YOU BETTER NOT CRY

YOU BETTER NOT POUT I AM TELLING YOU WHY

SANTA CLAUS IS COMING TO TOWN

AND THE REINDEER AND THE ALLIGATOR AND THE CHEER GIRLS, TEEN OR TWEEN, OH YEAH

AND WAVING TO EVERYONE WAVING TO EVERYONE

AND ONE LADY HAS THE GIFTS, SANTA WILL GIVE THE KIDDIES

AS THEY SIT ON HIS KNEES

AND WE PULL UP HERE AT MUFFIN BREAK

AND NOW WE ARRIVE AT SANTA’S WORKSHOP

AND ME SUE LONGWAYS IS EXCITED AS SANTA MEERTS HIS FIRSTKIDS IN THE LINE

ARE THE MOST EXCITIBLE KIDS IN WODEN

AS WE VWATCH THE KIDS EYES COME OUT WITH TOTAL AMAZEMENT

AS THE KIDDIES CHEER SANTA SANTA SANTA OI OI OI

WE ARE CHEERING ON OUR SANTA CLAUS, YEAH AND THE DOGS WALK ON THEIR PAWS

AND THE CROWD GOTN THEIR PHOTOS WITH THE GINGER BREAD MAN

AND NOW HERE IS BOBBHY WITH HIS SONG

BOBBY’   JINGLE BELLS JBATMAN SMELLS

ROBIN LAID AN EGG

THE BATMOBILE LOST IT’S WHEEL

AND THE JOKER GOT AWAY

JINGLE BELLS BATMAN SMELLS

ROBIN FLEW AWAY

WONDER WOMAN LOST HER *****,

FLYING QANTAS AIRWAYS

SUE’   AND WE LOST OUR MAN WHO SANG OUR JINGLE BELLS YOUNG DUDE SONG, SO WE CAN’T BRING HIM ON

BUT IT’S TIME TO GO AND PARTY DOWN IN SANTAS VILLAGE

A single tear.from mother.Africa.
Igbo ?
Kenya.
Jamaica. The.Caribbean diaspora.
Warm.and.easy.... Belize....coool trade winds.

Banana republic. UNU..IS WE
UNU IS YOU.
UNU is unity.

THE BOXING DAY SALES



WHAT CAN I SAY ABOUT THE BOXING DAY SALES

WELL, THE MALL IS OFTEN A PLACE FOR PEOPLE TO

DO THEIR STUFF, BUT BOXING DAY EVERYONE

IS PUSHING OVER EACH OTHER

THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH GOING TO THE MALL ON BOXING DAY

BUT BE PREPARED, IT’S LIKE ALL HELL BROKE LOOSE

YA SEE, PEOPLE BUY THINFS THEY NEVER USE

AND THE MOTHERS BUY KIDS LUNCH, NEVER GETS EATEN

KIDS RUNNING AROUND, SAYING YEAH WE AIN’T AT SCHOOL

LET’S CELEBRATE LET’S CELEBRATE

YOU SEE BOXING DAY IS THE FRANTIC DAY

IF YOU LIKE THE REGULAR DAYS AT THE MALL

NEVER GO ON BOXING DAY

CAUSE, THEY CALL IT BOXING DAY

CAUSE PEOPLE AT THE MALL BOX YOU OUT OF THE WAY

TO EXCHANGE THE TACKY COAT YOUR MOTHER BOUGHT YOU

TO A STYLISH RED LEATHER COAT, LOOKS BETTER AND COSTS THE FUCKEN EARTH

YA SEE IN MELBOURNE, THE BOXING DAY TEST, WITH AUSTRALIA AGAINST THE REST

AND THEN IN SYDNEY, IS THE SYDNEY - HOBART YACHT RACE, AND THAT IS RAD

AND OFTEN PEOPLE ARE CAMPED OUTSIDE SHOPPING CENTRES

TO GET FIRST GRASP AT THE BOXING DAY SALES

WITH ME, I SHOP FOR THE MOMENT, SOM I DON’T GET DISSAPOINTED

I DON’T NEED TO FALL ASLEEP OUTSIDE WESTFIELD BELCONNEN MALL

I AM USING PANADOL CAUSE ATHENA’S METHANE IS POUNDING

BUT THAT IS PREVIOUS LIFE TRAUMA, YA SEE THE PARACETAMOL IS REALLY GETTING IN

AND I CAN FEEL, WITH THE COCA COLA, AND REGULAR BRUSHING

THERE WILL BE ON INFECTION IN MY MOUTH, I DON’T WANT THAT

I PUT MY VIDEOS ON SOCIAL MEDIA TO ATTRACT A COOLER KIND OF PERSON

YA SEE, I DON’T NEED THE FIRST THINGS IN THE BOXING DAY SALES

I GET WHAT I WANT OUT OF LIFE, I REMEMBER A SONG

THE FESTIVAL OF SYDNEY IS OUR DAY, SYDNEY SYDNEY SYDNEY OI OI OI

I HAVE MY HOME NOW, SO I DON’T NEED TO HANG AT THE MALL AS MUCH

BUT CURRENTLY I AM DOING A TAPESTRY ON PATRICK DUNBARS LITTLE LEAGUE BASEBALL

I FEEL COOL, I FEEL ON TOP OF THE WORLD, LOOKING, OVER CREATION, LOOKING

THE ONLY SOLUTION I CAN FIND, AND AS I SANG FINE, PETER BUCHANAN

A MATE IN WOODBERRY IN THE 1970S, DID A REALLY COOL FINNNEEE

WITH A DEEPER VOICE, HE WAS COOOL MAN

I FAKED HIM TO PROVE A POINT TO THE YOUNG DUDES SAYING

JUST BECAUSE THE OTHER YOUNG DUDES UNDERSTOOD DAD’S WAY

DOESN’T MEAN I DID, HE LOOKED LIKE A REAL PAIN IN THE ***

TAKING MY COOL KID AWAY, BUT MUSTN’T DWELL, WE MUST HAVE FUN

I AM OFF TO THE CAVALRY MATCH TOMORROW, TO SEE THE FIRST

BUT I AM LEAVING AFTER THE FIRST MATCH, NO BUSES IN THE NIGHT

AND THE BOXING DAY SALES BRINGS OUT THE RIFF RAFF THE ROUGHER TYPES

AND THE CHEAP SUPERMARKET PUDDING JUNKIES LIKE ME WHO NEED TO GO TO THE MALL TO LEAVE THE HOUSE

BUT BOXING DAY SALES ARE FUN, IF YOU AIN’T IN THE INITIAL LINE

THAT CAN BE FRANTIC

Made it to art school, but you always knew you were too

coool

so you popped that gum in your mouth and blew out breath that was fresh, but found yourself in quite a mess, quite a beautiful, beautiful

mess

you loved some of the books, but what could they teach you? you love some of the teachers, but what could they preach to you?

escape artist made it out alive! HA

you walked in lowly to the art supply store bought yourself a drawing pad and a guitar, what a SCARE! what for, what for

you live on canned beans and stick to the paints and strings and the occasional
fling

your creations become serious and the songs become more profound, as your wild apartment blooms into a garden of spinning wheels

of spinning wheels

You take up a job where daydreaming is acceptable, and move on out of the way of your superiors when they walk in the room, punch in your time card, then continue on those silent a musings

jesting

throughout the day, throughout the day

you read very little and listen to even less but create a lot and thank the good lord for that!

The place smells of fumes and the streets beckon you, but you lay on top of the creations, high on it, high on it, high, high, high

high

YOU WHIP! YOU BANG! YOUR HEART IS SOBER FEEDING THE INSANE, you scrap everything

burn it
in a tin
can

and the clothes too

and your beard is long

you shave that too, yes

bloom, bloom,, bloom, bloom,

the next day you are ravenous and you eat five dollar burritos, two of them, you shave your head, in a  tank top

you are on fire, a wild vulture

DOO, DOO DOO DOO, DOO


THE WILD VULTURE IS ALIVE

NEW YORK CITY IS BURNING

FIRE ANTS, FIRE ANTS, FIRE ANTS

NEW YORK CITY IS BURNING

AND THE WILD VULTURE IS ALIVE

Keeping cool
Is an act of a brilliant mind

That knows far better
How to use his brain

Spike Spiegel kicks his friend in the guts
"What part of no don't you get."- Bonaro
"Well, I've learned that Vicious is better."- Jet
"Well, I'll take your advice when I beat him."- Spike
"Yeah, both of you are crooked in some ways."- Jet

Spike thinks on his life beyond the brushing in the sunsets
Time machines are great you know. Welcome
What, you find any of them on Ganymede?
Taking those sunsets and northern lights for granted.
Some of the Cowboy Bebop characters are too old for the ******* of Earth
"What are we doing in the courtesy of Earth? Let's go Red Dragon
THat's why Jet, Vicious can be beaten by Martian like me
"I thought you like music and fairies."- Spike
"Bonaro's my name."- Jet
"****, don't remember that Venusian guy anymore.
Spike wonders about the time past if he is so alone
Jet should have met Bonaro
Recco was a crazy disciple
"Coool."- Edward
"Spike listens into your cyborg rantings."- Jet
"Jet, what part of no don't you understand. Besides the kid has no respect."- Spike
"She might find something."- Jet
"Edward's woo hoo."- Edward puzzled
"Faye."- Spike
"Jesus hit him already."- Jet
"Yeah, probably."- Faye appears completely unaware

im so much better than youuuu
Im a ten your a twoooo
Im a queen your a fool
Im a throne your a stool
Youll never be this coool Wooooah
You wish you were meeeeeee
YEAH YOU WISH YOU WERE ME