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Jess Fleming Apr 6
It’s more complicated than just forgetting,
the last time I saw you in that shirt
you had one hand on the steering wheel
and the other on my thigh as we drove down the dirt roads of our small home town
having a destination in mind but not caring when we got there.
It’s not as easy
as singing along to that old rock and roll song your parents played on repeat that weekend we spent with them
in that log cabin in the mountains
where we ate foil packs and slept out underneath the stars every night.
I’m way past remembering who left last because it’s more complicated than counting the butterflies as they fly past
that bush in the front yard
of your grandparents’ house where we spent what seemed like every day
that summer we couldn’t get enough of each  other.
I can’t seem to forget the time you let me give you a haircut
after I had drank an entire bottle of wine
on an empty stomach because I refused to eat the dinner you made
out of fear I’d get fat and you wouldn’t love me anymore.
Now I realize, it didn’t matter if I ate that second cookie,
if I searched the sky for constellations with you,
or dreamed of living in the city because it doesn’t matter. You didn’t love me and I can’t go back

to arguing over whether we wanted  Spongebob or StarWars mac and cheese.
I cant go back to thinking the blankets on your bed will protect me from the monsters in the closet.
Your arms were both a comfort and a weapon as you pulled me closer
grabbing my waist as sweet apologies flooded from your lips as the rain fell around us
coating me in memories and regret.
I wanted to forget tonight and every night
with you.
The pitter patter of rain drops hitting the pavement provided background noise as your hands danced across my body.
The thunder cracked and I realized no amount of blankets could protect me from the monsters in the closet
because they were inside us.
searching for one another.
“Forgive me” you whispered kissing my hand like you did that first night we spent alone

in your room. You said you were sorry
but your green eyes couldn’t be more unapologetic.
The thing is this time I couldn’t just forget.
It wasn’t that easy
because you were more complicated than that.
imtooawake May 13
I love you.
Three words
which change everything
For better or for worse
May give you wings or break your heart
Can make you smile or cry
Could be a way to the new life or quicker death
Connect or break people apart
Can be a reason for peace, more likely war
Said in a serious manner
                 but more often without seriousness
Be careful before you say them aloud
Alaina Moore Mar 2013
Plagiarism of worthless ideals,
that you so ignorantly hold high.
Shaking in amazement,
how can you call your self alive?

Totalitarian, lethargic lifestyle.
Ignominious displays of disaffection.
Constant contradictions;
out of your mind.

Caught up in the clouds,
cognition of mania and level debauched.
Up to high to realize, you're an “open mind” with locked doors.
Maslow, Skinner, and Darwin alike, turn in their graves,
over your lack of evolution.
I do not know where I am going,
for I have no clue where I've truly been.
I  would like to see the world in its entirety,
but I am so scared of the unknown.
I want to be lost in the sea of people I know,
but I want to be exceptional.
I think of you,
but I know I will never have you.
I need security,
but I ruin what I have.
I write fickle things,
but I yearn to weave beautiful words about important issues.
I hate myself,
but I love being different.
Marla Sep 9
Every time someone calls me
I fizz away.

Whenever people neglect me
I calmly stay.

Mirrors line the walls
in every nightmare.

The only thing worse
than your stare
is my own.

Hold your breath
and sing.

Whisper your secrets
until a truth is heard...

You must die to return
the way we did at birth.
Lynnia Jul 2018
I don’t understand you
You’re not like me
I walk with caution
You’re flying free
I sit alone
You yell out loud
I hide away
You stand tall and proud
I thought you were shallow
That you lacked a heart
In one night, all those things
shot away like a dart
Then the very next day
I had to take it all back
You made the same mistake
Same foresight you lack
You’re contradictory
Just a flip of a page
From abrasive; young-minded
To older than age
I still don’t understand you
We’re not even close
But I hope someday I get you
When it matters the most.
Some things I just don’t understand...
Deovrat Sep 23
teachings and preachings
are confined only
upto written
audio visual

from the
deeds of

a good person
though each one
having inside a demon
busy in preaching
evils to everyone

@deovrat 23.09.2019
Grey Dec 7
Why is it
That I am nothing compared to you

And yet
You call me your everything?
Traveler Feb 2015
To open the mind
I light a candle
To bring about change
I open my heart
To resolve my doubts
I examine my own
Judgmental contradictions
Then and only then
Does peace and tranquility
Have a place to dwell...
re to 12-18
Monisha Jul 24
Moments of life,
Moments to explore,
Moments when I go crazy,
Moments when I need more.

Moments that are mine,
Moments that I do not own,
Moments that are heightened,
Through thoughts and no thoughts alone.

Moments penning poetry,
Moments by the sea,
Moments smelling  flowers,
And the thorns pricking me.

Exquisite Joy
and Exquisite pain,
Moments with another,
feeling his grasp on my mane.

Moments where my thoughts are in knots,
Moments of release where I see just stars and dots.

And then sweet oblivion,
And floating gently above the  tree,
Moments where I open my body and soul,
And am bound and totally free!
Sophia Apr 2018
a tear drops from her eyes
and it brings no cause
though it quivers with emotion

and the stars do not shine brighter
when polished with her briny tears
but dim their glow and listen
to her sobbing
but wait
her capillaries will burst!
stop it!
stop it!

its translucence
its opaqueness
the inherent contradictions it produces
and the images it emanates

so while her eyes may open
they are unfocused
and gone
and the click of their judgements is obscene
because her soul has escaped

where has it gone?
she swears she saw it just a moment ago
just a moment
just a moment
just a moment
Alec Astaire Nov 2018
I finally tracked him down: the person within me who could live without you
So I made him a cup of tea and he began to prattle
About the demonic conductor of my symphonic heartbeats,
And the chthonic tranquility you once deposited into my life stream.
He sniggered at how, even now, I still attempt to draw from that diluted reservoir
In an attempt to discover anything more glorious that a utopian delusion,
An unwarranted euphoria derived from what someone might call the “good times”-
If I gave you the benefit of the doubt and admitted there really was a time your love wasn’t fictitious.
But, I digress
Because I wish you the best
Even if the good times discarded are times I should regret
There was a time when you uncovered my covert capacity for unexpurgated bliss-
The likes of which I had dismissed
As myth or at the very least unrealistic to attain.
Even if all of the solace I find in our memories is disingenuous,
I still thank you for way you fooled me.
And that’s why I screamed at him.
After the nightcap, I chased him out of the house for even flirting with the idea of his own existence.
For I have not the fortitude to meet with him for more than just a few moments.
Right now, I choose to cherish our memories until I forget that I love you,
Until the day I’ll be ready to unite with my harbinger of recovery.
Chris Chronister Oct 2013
Pulling on wings
Slowly and delicately
I hear the screaming
Expressing my fears
I continue to pull
This hurts me
I hear the crying
My sadness is appreciated
This enables me to continue
I am feeding myself
I want to cut deep
I need this
Contradictions are my life
Duality defines me
I want to hurt you immensely
I want to be the only one
The only one who can heal you
I need you to love me
I am slowly dying
I want you to bleed with me
But I will feel guilty
I have pain to give
I will always try to hurt you
I will always love you!

© Christopher Chronister. All rights reserved
Free verse poem written from the perspective of someone ending a relationship but wanting or even needing the other person to ache for reconciliation.  It pains the person leaving and he/she can not fully let go, thus holding the other person's heart hostage.  Some people need to be needed but resent it at the same time.
Andrew Rueter Sep 2017
My mind is foggy
Though I'm not groggy
A mist emerges
My peace it purges
I see contradictions
And feel convictions
That inflict conflict
And indict convicts
So I accumulate cumulus clouds accordingly
To fog my marshy mind more horribly
My brain becomes a banshee
And screams from my mist
She shrieks an awful list
Of everything wrong
And everyone gone
Her voice blasts through my cerebral stratus clouds
And her voice echoes within the silent static crowd
The clouds I gathered to block her wailing
Are completely empty and always failing
They look so absolutely grand and solid in the sky
They're just water vapor that form droplets in my eyes
Öüi Nov 2018
You are a strange kind of beautiful
The type that not all men can handle
You are fire and ice, something spiteful
But I am attracted for reasons I cannot tell
You are a mess of contradictions
But I can see something beautiful
Something that others cannot see for some reasons
But I know that what awaits me is something wonderful
And if I would be so bold
I'd ask you to trust me and show me everything
Show me all your imperfections and I will never fold
Show the beauty within you and I will love you with my everything
I'm ready to fight in the front line
I'm willing to lay down my life for you
I will keep you safe all the time
And never let anyone take you or hurt you
I'll be your soldier
I will fight until the war is won
I'll be your lover
And we will write a story of our own
First poem. IJVS
Kenya83 Oct 2018
Eternal tug of war will come what may
Non-religious, I pray, for the comfort of day
Then hope for night to take the pain away
Fear holds me paralysed
Stuck in the mud of yesterday, today
Weight of the worlds contradictions fall
What if it’s my own heart I betray?
Myra Aug 3
Oh how these times are contradictory to the fire in my soul!
That once was a fearlessness is now a sinking hole
I once dodged lovers who made me feel like I walked on glass
That everything I did was wrecking what we had
The people who make you feel unfit or that you need to be three steps ahead
I recorded such brokenness and my heart whispered "Never again."

I've let down my guard so quick and fell comfortable too fast
And still I was hurt despite a different approach from my past

How to live?
How to love?
Can I walk on eggshells with a partner,
Or is being too cautious too much?

Contradictions of the heart
When I'm experiencing two points of view
What is so easily kept inside my head
Is stirred by thoughts of you
pitch black god8 May 2018
are you generally happy?

a semi-innocuous query
now actualized as a two sided bladed poker,
hot stabbing me smack dab in
the chests hollow crown bullseye,
continuously,  as in all life long, and eternal longing for a

it fits inside a pubescent aged wound that
refreshes with every breath;
a life long struggle for an accurate definition,
be a general of genuine happy,
that alone would deliver, bringing on bright day satisfaction

as a human, one operates on parallel continuums;
slide slipping on well oiled poles that over the years,
their lengths, increasing with add-on extender poles
formed by
twisty turny slips and falls of sundered hearts and sad loves,
marriages nicknamed Titanic, children found and lost,
complications responsibilities that are denied meeting the words  
  “The End”

a life that many would envy, questioning what’s wrong
with you dude, are you blinded to the riches yours,
reality is
shoulders permanently bent, a spine that’s held together by
spit and solder and curved by wearying wearing longing for
a straightness that is also called crooked unobtainable
and a piece of a peace that comes and goes
like a highway billboard that you pass too fast to be fully read

the body is corroding and worser yet to come and that’s a hand
you selected - luck of the self-selecting-drawing -

the opioids of the mind offers are rejected

the clarity of painful self exploration valued overall -
the place where the poems come from,
and go to die,
a landscape of a scene repeatedly visualized
but never been and never left,
the crazy contradictions come in two flavors;
vanilla smiles and chocolate weeping of tears that have
etched pathways cheek-chiseled

the city is a struggling strife for most,
the next red line on the side
of the measuring cup  and
everyone has a cell, a credit card,
and a measuring cup
here I stop can’t finish  
someone missing alerts me
to their real worlds troubles
making my complaints super superficial but
the silent running of the stilleto
cuts shallow
repeated hourly
the cut color,

pitch black
Simone Zona Nov 2017
She sits in stoop, low over the sodden earth
Pressing herself  to leave an impression in the muck
some sort of public confession,

That she actually exists.
Swallowing whole all things dead and dying, but
Her own unsubstantiated concept of
Living, defying her purpose
In insipid contradictions

To her needless desperation to grow.
To prove her own mass substantial
Absorbing into herself all things that seem too real,
That threaten her absoluteness
That threaten to have existed before her
Vilene Joubert Oct 2015
The darkness finally pulls you in
Whilst you lay there pondering about your sins

Knowing who you were before
Realizing what you have become

Embracing both worlds
Figuring out
Who would win...

You know who you want to be...
Falling back within
The darkness sinks you in..

Wishing these contradictions
Would just come to an end..

How did you become so weak
Yet strong in sin

Not ready for this world
Changes are so scary...

You don't want to be boring
Yet this life has no meaning

Once ambitious
Now just lost
Drowning in confusion...
Jaxey Feb 25
I hate you for making it impossible to hate you
- j

P.S. Why am writing this again?
god why do i need you so much
Ksh Nov 2
First among many.
That was me, to you; the first from the last.
The last among many.
That was you, to me; the last from the rest.
Quite a nice position, wasn't it?

A woman of many talents,
of many stories that were too late told,
of hardships in silence buried.
A lifetime of rollercoasters,
of standing on a pedestal
and being struck to the ground,
heel to skull, teeth to pavement,
threatening to never let up.

Yet you did, and have not spoken of it since.

Do the words 'too little, too late' ring any bells?
Does the phrase 'less is more' still hold true?

In my mind, I see you in an ocean of darkness
Helpless, and friendless,
suffering in silence.
Yet, you're hardened by years of experience,
of hurt in the dark, of scars in the night.
You, an old dog,
and one of your oldest tricks --
licking your wounds in isolation,
willing the world to do its worst
as you weathered the storm,
one that you've already withstood before.

I can only describe you as an Inverse;
a woman who,
ignoring her own palms skinned to muscle, to bone,
built ramps and laid bridges
to give children enough space to run;
who, turning her back from a life of rejection and hate,
showered everyone with only gratitude, and love,
and everything that she knew she deserved but never received.

You, who brought words to life
in a language so deeply underappreciated,
have rendered the world speechless.
You, who have shown strength
in the face of adversity,
have rendered your blood weak.

A woman of contradictions,
contradictions of the best kind --
for even in death, we celebrate life.
To my late grandmother, who I wish I could have shown more appreciation to when she was still alive. I love you, lola. I wish with all my heart that you knew exactly how much.
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