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I’m a soldier
in a war
sold to the highest bidder
Biding my time
getting high
but not getting
anything out of
life

A lifer
a loser
lost his way
was on his way
on a journey
was earning
a living
was living
a life
in spite of
spitting in the face
of all I was faced with
Couldn’t face up
to the need
I was feeding
A hole
from which
my soul
was bleeding
Unknown reason
harboring this treason
give it time
it will season
Belief system
the Devil
finds pleasing

No matter
how much I tried
and from everyone hide,
including myself,
what was
deep inside
If I went
and made
an attempt
a fool I'd be,
wasted time spent
A lament
at controlling
the tide
And each day
from the next
more and more
of me died

There was a time
when all my efforts
went unheeded
and instead
succeeded
But these courtships
did not breed
or plant the seed
Instead was seething
to be
leaving
Escaping from me
with each breath
I’m breathing

A horrible time
indeed
Unfamiliar,
making me ill
Not having free will
Undeserving
and not for me
to get
Must get angry
and upset
Breaking steps
So many
missteps
I’m falling
more than I’m standing

Steps I’ve climbed
mostly blind
by my blindfold
Its knots
I bind
the moment
I ‘rise-and-shine’
so that
in time
when rising
like yeast,
the hiding
inner self
self-defeats

Every hand folding
as I’m
raising the bets,
doesn't make sense
From where
did I get
this invisible pet
Originally set
and previously molded
in the early stages
of the morning
in a story
that’s boring
and been told
time and time again
with
lost love ones
and friends

A friendly reminder
that a
“stitch-in-time”
is not
a time saver
if the referenced ‘stitch’
relied upon
was built upon
lies
Consumed
from others
that we
self tie
but mostly
force fed
by the very hand
controlled
by my head

It’s a numbing thought;
reasons sought
Elusive?
‘yes’
but pieces
caught
My peace disturbed
by actions
brought
from a desire
to numb
so that these thoughts
will be
forgotten

Decayed
and rotten
left for days
in a
wrought iron cage
Anyone
with sage
too afraid
to consume
but 'In-Doom'
I trust
and with full ******
my smile
displayed;
Forward I go
for sins
I pay
and lie within
this bed
I've made

Not night;
thick of day
No difference displayed
Skewed indifference
to the
different
paths
that have been
laid
like the path
of destruction
from this day
back
in my wake
Bindings
can't brake
A life's mistake
Lay me down
my soul
to take
Lying in state,
a viewing,
my wake
My mind
now awake
-
Cruelty's laugh
makes me
an ***
A crass reminder
of a life
that's past
Written: July 14, 2018

All rights reserved.
Cné Jul 2017
I sit and read the HP site
and observe a teardrop's course
Engaged in deepest revelry
and when it dies, remorse.

I listen to the rustle of the rhymes
in swaying Poetrees...
And revel in the sweet caress
of every whispered breeze

The sweetness of a sentence
every stanza, works of art
The rhymes that touch my soul
and lo, the rhythm that beats from heart.

The lullabies so sweet and soft
that gentle me to sleep
The love tributes, as I nod off
while counting them as sheep.
I love reading all your words of art. Thank you, HP poets and poetess'
Melissa S Apr 2018
I come here as much as I can
Love the sounds and smells that surround me
It is just so peaceful and I love to people watch
I try and imagine how their lives are
Are they happy or in pain
Do they, like me, yell out their lies and frustrations
to be carried out swiftly in the wind                                                         ­ 
Are their disappointments and regrets
washed away by the waves as well...
Do they draw pictures in the sand of broken hearts
Do they become a beach scavenger
Searching for discarded treasures
I wonder if they come here as an escape
To renew oneself and just be
One with this constant ...our constant the sea
Heading on a girls beach trip soon to see my constant the sea :) I cannot wait!!!
Jon York Nov 2012
The one constant
in life is change
so you learn
to anticipate it
and you learn
to welcome it
and you  learn
to always
expect it.

Alone
with my thoughts
and alone
with my doubts
and alone
with my fears
but with her
I find the courage
for no more
tears.

Things change
as she comes
into range
and as  she
comes to me
we make the
exchange.

Her love
is strong
and she knows
it isn't wrong
and it is
change for her
and change for me
but we both
knew that
it was coming
because we both
could see.

We both
anticipated it
as she has
become
the one constant
in my life.                        Jon  York            2012
Madison Nov 2018
Music devours me.
Every note
Every verse,
Chips away at my existence
Until I’m lost in its rythme
Reilly Dec 2018
I'm bleeding.
There is no way to stop it
I've done this to myself
I cant break this habit.
It's not physical,
but the pain is real
These next moments are pivotal
I don't want to feel.
The river slows to a creek
and then a stream.
But it never stops flowing,
it fills my dreams.
I'm never safe
from myself it seems.
I'm bleeding.
I've never really been interested in writing poems that rhyme, it just always felt forced to me. But with this poem it came out so easily, and it seems to add to the message, as oppose to distracting from it.
If you enjoy my poetry please check out page, I try to post a couple poems a week if I can.
Jessica B Jul 2018
A constant is control
Your every surrounding contains a constant
Constantly ever changing
in what ways are we shaped by our own constant?
Our society?
How does it mold our perception?
it is but a constant
I am who I am
I can only hope that
creativity defines me
As my flaws weave through each definitive line of my life
And My colors define me with each shade of its own
It was once spoken that
“Imagination was greater than knowledge”
Because It is all its own.
Creativity is freedom ❤️
Dead Rose One Nov 2017
<>

No, He said.

I want you
wanting.

I want to taste the miracle of your desperation,
lick the sweet sweat of tense from the hairline well hid
on the back of your pleasuring neck.

I need your needing constant completion,
but not succeeding.

The airborne aroma of your desires are fiery, arousing,
stimulus sensating me by the unending beauty of dissatisfaction,
this virus desirous, infection, makes my perpetual wanting  
for an incomplete perfect woman,
forever seeking betterment,
perfectly complete.


<>
11-15-17 11:51pm
mixed up emotions re this one; who is the striver, who is selfless   and/or selfish;  can be understood in many different ways
Poly Via Nov 2018
This constant cycle of asking of how I am certain.

For once you be so certain about yourself and not question my love and certainty.

For once know I’ve been hurt and in pain as you have. else you and I wouldn’t be face to face at this particular moment

For once make love to me like you did the first time. for I still make love to you with as much want, need and intensity.

I’m exhausted but need your touch  

It’s constant.

must have your finger tips against my skin.

It’s constant.

**** over you lips pressed against mine.

It’s constant.

Sweating, realesing, breathing, exhaling in lost. Indeed it’s constant.

My constant is obvious. I leave the past to the past. The moment is first and my certainty of you is constant my love
I am immortal in my mind-
That's what frightens me.

Not the procrastination of existence,
Or the constant monologue of time,
Nor the hurried dissection of my ego and person.

It's the introspection and daydreaming.
The lie of eternity.
Probably the strangest title I've used
Jaycee May 2015
Take care of me,
Be there for me.
Never discourage me,
Love me unconditionally.
You're supposed to be my mother.
But you treat me like I'm nothing.
I'm sick of your constant disrespect,
The loss of love in your eyes that makes me want to cry,
It's itching inside of the back of my mind.
And someday I'll say goodbye to you,
You won't want me to,
But you can't make me stay.
You're not my mom.
But until then,
I'll be walking in the rain.
Nobody Aug 2017
There's no place to suffer,
no going away.
It's dark in here,
all of my days.
No smiling lights,
no happy surprise;
only this disguise
of constant lies.
I know they bother them,
my sad eyes;
they can't bear to see,
they want me to hide.
Or stay empty inside,
so they won't feel down;
still one by one,
they all turn around.
They never stay
or test their extent of pain,
they only obey
their impulse to stray far away;
and desert me to ache,
in this dark hole, they can’t take.
Where I get no relief,
not even in sleep;
so I guess save yourself,
I’ll taint that light you keep.
Burden your soul,
till you can't take anymore.
Drain you dry,
before I kiss you goodbye.
And you'll never know,
when it's all done;
I'll still be empty,
and you'll be gone.
Softly Spoken Dec 2018
There’s always a bustle here
In my ritual place of ribs and beer
The sharp scent of ****** and coriander
The acrid burr in my nose of seared flesh
Fusion food served around me
But I go for Hirata.. again.
Can’t argue with taste, and it tastes
Korean bbq and Buddha beer
A brief nod to the moments of clarity
As said by drunks
The beer bottle cool in my hand as I reflect
Beads of condensation forming on Buddhas belly
And I’m here hoping for Constant
It’s now my third attempt
In as many months to catch a glimpse
And tonight apparently the stars align
Jupiter and Mercury on the rise
As I walk in
There is a way about him
So much bluff and bravado...
reminds me of someone I once loved
There is a mischief in his smile
Something warm in his eyes
Even beyond his jokes of his ego
Too big for the Room, apparently
I don’t discourage..
He’s honest in a way that piques
So here I am
Third time lucky finding Constant
To my delight he recognises me instantly
“Lucky Buddha for the lady?”
His eyes dance..
I interpret, maybe to much
But believe he’s pleased to see me
So we joke..
We laugh
I watch him get an earful
For not concentrating on the flow
The manager in tow..
and he side-eyes me and winks
Inwardly I hi-five myself for
Timing this so perfectly
So here I am
Trying not to watch Constant flow
Trying not to blush as he looks my way
“I’m too old for this ****” I think
Then feel like a kid
When he throws a grin my way
I regular Wagamama in transit.. for the food mainly... ok maybe not all for the food
kyleigh g Feb 2018
constant paranoia
sleepless nights
bustling hospital halls

trust me
this is nothing less than horrific
after attempting to end it all

"take me home"
i whisper to no one
through my silent tears

staying in a psych ward
for just one week
felt like several years

all i can do
is worry
about if anyone will care

i think they believe
that they would be better off
if i was no longer there

my week in the hospital
was heart-wrenchingly
bleak

everyone says
it made me stronger
but i feel immensely weak
i apologize for pouring my heart out. but it's very therapeutic.
Hartaz Kaur Oct 2018
The constant vacillation around decisions that bind
The eternal struggle between heart and mind
Choose your virtues, and let them serve you
They may not confine you, but they will define you

Rise above in courage and faith
Stand your ground, bite no bait
A circle smaller, but what does it matter
True friends you acquire, unhand the admirer

You'd do away with all things shallow
If you are to rest easy on your pillow
The sun will shine bright in the morrow
And you'd rise again to be your hero
Nat Lipstadt Jun 2018
why I love certain men


it’s a raining and writing Saturday,
a washout for the beach visitors who chose their
calendar lottery tickets poorly

but hurrah and huzzah for the poet
in the no-sun-today-room with
steam collecting on his face from his 20 oz. Canadian mug,
and the rest of him cozied neath a
wooly mohair knitted and tasseled blanket,
from a now shivering alpaca goat in Turkey or Tibet

perhaps we’ll make a tiny dent
in the 1319 poems
in the ‘sorta started to do’ list

****.
new one sneaks in demanding immediate satisfaction
and threatening my mind’s incarceration unless
serviced and unleashed as the Frenchies say
Frites, immédiatement!: (french fries, now!)

I love most men; certain men more than others,
not because they are soft to the touch,
look great in thigh highs, can fix a backhoe,
or write better poetry than me,
because
they make me weep from zealous delight at
their capricious unprecedented constancy of their
honorable actions

they are soft to the core, which is itself
wrapped in a leather soldered steel
which defines them by their self questing constant,
asking themselves preface and postface,
as well, doing it in between,

what is the honorable thing?

this honor idea of which writ previous
doesn’t dissolve - indeed grows crescendo stronger,
like the miracle of the Yom Kippurs rams horn
crying out to heavens at the concluding end  
on the holiest judgement day,
a shofar miracle for it inhumanly grows ever louder,
ceasing only when nightfall marks a new day begun,
reminding both sinners and saviour each,
to inquire of their colluding selves on this forgiveness-giving day,

what is the honorable thing?

some are borrowers and some lenders,
of anything, the substance or the whom matters not,
but the bonding bonfire from which the deal is done,
is of a uncharted chemical organic chemical matter unrecognized
but millennium ancient


here I stop

the call to breakfast must be obeyed,
for it’s with lovely made, menu man-poet requested,
this is too an honorable thing to do,
and the 1319 half blood~half writs poking my eyes,
can be faced with new courage afterwards
on a perfect raining and writing Saturday
for the next one hopefully and woefully

may not come till the September (Rosh Hashanah) acorns fall

certain men will greet that fall Sabbath/ New Years Day,  
by asking of everything living and every act human

what is the honorable thing?

which by the by,

is why I love certain women too...

and all who are honorable
will read this honorific and remain
clueless as to whom it is addressed...

oh god, I do love that best

what could signal honor even more
6-23-18 11:45am
ryn Nov 2014
In solitude...
There's constant talk of the moon
And incessant wishes upon stars
Each word is cast unto paper
Unsure if they'd stretch that far

In solitude...
I embody pelts of droplets from the sky
As thunder mark the seconds that would elapse
Stagnant puddles of liquid dreams
Ever flowing in endless traps

In solitude...*
I feel the urge to lose all balance
Aloneness beckons like a long lost friend
Always strange but familiar
To see and be at the bitter end
Alaina Moore Mar 2013
Plagiarism of worthless ideals,
That you so ignorantly hold high.
Shaking in amazement,
How can you call your self alive?

Totalitarian, lethargic lifestyle.
Ignominious displays of disaffection.
Constant contradictions;
Out of your mind.

Caught up in the clouds,
Cognition of mania and level debauched.
Up to high to realize, an “open mind” with locked doors.
Maslow, Skinner, and Darwin alike, turn in their graves,
Over your lack of evolution.
8/22/17

I can't stop thinking about you. Since the first moment I met you you're a constant in my head. Why? What is it about you that leaves a lingering effect? I don't want this. I keep dreaming of you, it isn't always the same. You're the closest thing to me in some, in others you're the furthest thing I can see that's still in focus. Round and round and round and round you spin in my head. I don't even know what exactly I'm thinking of when I'm thinking of you. I spend my time thinking about not thinking about you and I'm caught in a loop of you. I hope you're ok, I hope you’re safe, I hope you've eaten today, I hope you sleep well, I hope you're healthy. When will these feelings and thoughts fade? How can I spend so much time thinking about someone to whom my existence is much too much to even acknowledge? I don't hate you for this, but it still hurts. All my 11:11's are spent on you. I wish clarity, I wish stability, I wish happiness, and I wish love for you with whomever or whatever it is...

-JCM-
laura Sep 2018
got to eat them as they darken
reddened ruby to black constant opal
berries will rot quickly if you don’t
or they’ll taste real gooey and wierdy
if you let the drupelets’ colors get
unsynchronized like summer and fall

...why am i telling you this?
because i learned that the hard way
and the days go away in the gleam
heavy showers and peak-a-boo sun
the east barely bracing for the storm
and the sweetness decaying like the leaves
o this is so sad, alexa play despacito
A presence
presenting
a continuous torment
torturing
incessantly
until, even with cessation
only a tenuous self
is present
leaving only the resin

The maniacal
manifestation
is an infestation
festering around in my head
Its existence,
a creation
created at inception,
hacking my brain
Forever a trap
creating a
maniac

Acrimonious
to all mankind
Not acting
like a man
Not one word
that's kind
Committing crimes
and getting oneself
committed
A deviation
creating a deviant
Shifted values
due to a devalued
self

An esoteric
essence
seemingly sentenced
on this journey
by judge and jury,
not by one's peers
because the many
not able
to peer
into this individuality
The duplicity
of duality
that is my reality

Challenging myself
to a dual
One in which
I both
win and lose
But in the end
not breaking even
or coming out ahead
Always ending
further back
instead

Its back breaking
and always aching
Pain from which
not capable of
faking
Effort I’m taking
Of myself making
Time for a new king
For kinsmanship
is aloof
And this man’s ship
has sailed away
Sipping a port
at a shipping port
And yet
slipping away

Deeper still
In the depth
of still water
Sinking
into the abyss
Lost and gone
But not missed
Is this the end
of our fable?
Or will our “hero”
enable himself
and in the end
be able
Deciding who to be?
Cain or Abel?
For the hurricane
is hurrying along
Its aim always the same
Constant pain
A payment he feels
for the displaced
placement
which just in case
is placed
same place
he went

Ink in the face
A disgrace
When suddenly
encased in his brain
are racing thoughts
of a plan
he’s ace’n

A label of insanity
given by those
who claim sanity
when the reality
is their thoughts are free
and optimize
a sanitized
and homogenized
batter
And in the end
it doesn’t matter

Offering suggestions
in which they
feel threatened
Pathways congested
and protested
Testing them
Even worse,
bested
A problem beset
upon them
Time to steady
the flock
Roll n’ Rock
Inoculations we’re getting
Start the injections

“It’s been an honor”
Mounting my Lipizzaner
A disarmer
A charmer
The armor
‘mi amor’
Leaving me
wanting more
But as they keep score
the task is daunting
A life that’s haunting
with such splendid decor
-
Yet, can’t take any more
Their taunting
is leaving me sore
So to the atmosphere
I open that door
and flying up above
I soar

Forever more
Feel pain no more...
Written: August 17, 2018

All rights reserved.
sofie Jan 3
He told me that
when he looked at me,
he saw himself

Back then,
it made me smile

But now I've realized
that whenever our eyes met,
he was reminded of
what a broken soul
he actually was

I was the reason for his constant suffering
Could we know hope
Without loss?
Without truth
Would all be false?
Without joy
Would we all know pain?
Questions such as these
Make life a game
Answers never found
Questions never asked
Our perceived personalities
Are our perceived masks
I'm tired of life
I'm tired of pain
But I'll continue this lie
For the sake of the game
My wounds never heal
But scars are left behind
My tears tell a story
My eyes seem to hide
Do you see my pain?
Do you know the truth?
No, you're wrong
You see what I allow you
My poker face
Wins the hand
I'm on my knees
Because I can no longer stand
You read my words
You think you know
But even these words
Can't quite show
My mind isn't quiet
My thoughts never cease
Fading away
Would cute this disease
As smiles are replaced
With the sadness that seeps in
Forgive my actions
But not my sins
No god in heaven
Can cure my sorrow
Standing on the edge
I can see my tomorrow
I see my ****
Can you see yours?
I keep mine inside
I'll never tell
For those who never knew
I'm sorry for this
But I'll continue this game
For the **** of it
Alyssa Underwood Jul 2016
O Lord Jesus,
I want to live and walk and bow
in constant awe of You,
but I am so easily distracted and waylaid.
Fasten my eyes and heart on You,
for You alone are worthy.
I am not worthy to even peek at Your beauty,
but by Your own worthiness You've invited
me to dwell forever in Your presence,
yet how often I refuse the privilege.
Why would I ever do that?
What is wrong with me?
How hard-headed and hard-hearted I must be!
Save me from my messed-up self
and from this messed-up world,
for I am sorely helpless and lost without You.
Draw me by the force of Your love
into the light of Your glory and goodness,
awaken me to the healing touch of Your Word.

Capture and change me to the core,
for only You can, my Savior.
Rid my soul of its blinding
filth, muck, rot and *******
that I may freely sing, dance,
swim and soar in the wonder of You.
Cause me to crave You with an insatiable,
desperate appetite that expels my fleshly hunger.
Teach me to ever feast on You!
I need You and long for You, Jesus,
but send the burning, ripping ache
deeper, deeper, deeper until nothing
remains but desire for You.
Come and satisfy me, O Delight of delights,
in that glorious and awestruck place
of endless fascination and total possession
where my will is finally drowned in Yours.
ayame Dec 2017
the cold breeze crawls against his skin
powerful enough to give him goosebumps
but not the kind he's been searching

he treks against the snow, hurriedly
as if time is passing by too fast
and he's afraid he might fall behind

his constant worries trail him
like an unwanted game of hide and go seek
except he is always being found

he longs for the sun, an image
destroyed by the constant winters
that ceaselessly plague his mind

but he doesn't need to hunt for
what he already has in
the palm of his hand

all he must do is wait
for the snow to melt
and spring to come again

where i will welcome him
with open arms, like the ones
he so desperately yearned for
18/12/17. for kim jonghyun, an inspiration of mine who passed before his time. you've worked hard. don't worry anymore.
Mystic Ink Plus Nov 2018
You are my favored
Hallucination
I don’t want to get rid of

Nothing compares to you
Close to thought
The One, my saviour
Genre: Romantic
Theme: Brevity of the words
Zersrol Sep 2018
I feel so driven
Feels like the past has flown by
In a flash
But I’m still in my coma
My coma of obsession

It may seem fast to the car
But I’m seeing everything slow
My mind is racing
but my body is slow

Every time I feel driven
I turn the wrong way
My heart is in constant pain

But the car is in a constant disarray
Always so fast
But never up to my speed

I feel so slow
But really
that’s how I should be
Since thou I may never plead
What I dream
I made this about a obession I have over a girl. As naive as I am, this is how I feel and I wish not to feel this way but instead I can’t stop because I hold myself back. Her name was like a car. Enjoy❤️!
Macgyver Oct 2018
Ambitious bastions always tout
progressive plans when they're about
while within they hide and pout
from novel things that may prove out.

And while inventing goals to follow
their ancients habits hold them hollow
as in vain wary workers wallow
force fed lies and hooks to swallow.

They hunt for those who work past five,
that trudge to work, endure the drive
who will sacrifice their personal live
until ambition can't survive.

Yet if you strive, you're constant told
do not do more, do not be bold
just fill your seat, forever hold
your tongue until you're dead and cold.

To subsist we're forced to hide,
only in others can we confide,
all success pushed to the side
as managers act bona fide.

Since those of meager measure make
hope of meeting metrics fake
interloping leaders take
their toll until hard workers break.
King Panda Jun 2016
this is my excavation to
the days coming along
running hands with laughter
throwing it down on the table
straight
flush
okay, cool


sister, these things don’t matter
when we’re twisting into the sun
with pants that are too short
the fountain rich with
iced chai
tangled with the peculiar
the beautiful
through these moments
I commend
our hearts for finding each other

love is always on the move
as sure as shoe shine
as mahogany
like timidity to relinquish
to let the universe take hold
and instill this emotion
into my body
fit it all in my heart
O, singer of love
fit it all in my heart
the knell
the reverberation
the cotton that lands
on your hair
the sunscreen stuck in my ear

we are a sketch of two travelers
sleeping under stars
the fire
finally dies down
the rapture of the universe
is overwhelming
everything flows
everyone is connected
and this music we hear
is constant
like gentle waters falling

this too, sister
makes my cane solemn
and I draw you in the sand
only to watch the tide
wash you next to me
the emotion
wrangled in English
simply means good
simply means
a full listen and
dear sister
because everything begins
and will be remembered always
as love
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